You and I
by Natascha Romanoff
Summary: A collection of Romanogers one shots.
1. Let's get it on

"I think we can call that mission a success!" Sam annoucend when the quinjet got back to HQ. They had been tracking down rebels in Somalia and handed them over to authorities. No colleteral damage and no one of them team was hurt.

So yeah Natasha had to agree that it was a success. She landed the jet on the airfield and followed the others out to the armory where all their suits and weapons were stored. She handed her batons and Glocks over and left to get a shower. Wanda was already there and humming a song in the stall next to her. Natasha didn't have a problem to shower where the guys showered but since Wanda joined they had their own shower quarters because Wanda had a more conversative upbringing and they didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable.

Natasha rinsed the dirt and sweat off her body and out of her hair and changed into a shirt and one of her beloved yoga pants. Wanda was already done with blow drying her hair and waited for her.

"I think the guys want to watch a movie in the lounge. You wanna come? Sam wants to introduce Bucky to Top Gun." Wanda gave her one of her smiles and slid her jewellery back on.

Nat had to suppress a smirk. "No, thanks. I need to look over some files with Cap."

"You two always work so hard. I kinda feel guility that we don't help you with the paper work."

"It's okay. That's a part of leading a team." She grabbed her phone out of her locker. "I'll see you tomorrow at breakfast."

Steve was already in his office and sitting at his desk when she got in. The blinds were close and he had his desk lamp on.

"Hey."

"Hi Nat." He smiled briefly at her and looked back at the file on his desk. " Looks like we captured every important head of that rebel group."

"That's good." She walked over to him and he pushed his chair back from the table.

She sat down on the desk and Steve got up and pushed her legs apart to stand between them. "Hey." He whispered huskily. God, his voice was so fucking sexy.

She grabbed his hoodie and pulled him down to kiss him. He placed his big hands on her waist to press her body against him. "Oh that's so much better than Top Gun." She gasped out when he began to trail wet kisses on her neck.

He chuckled against her skin and began to remove their clothes.

* * *

"Are you seeing someone?" Rhodey asked her when they were on their way back to the Avengers compound after a meeting with General Talbot who was bitchy because he had hoped to finally meet Captain America but Steve tried to talk Tony out of recruiting Parker for the Avengers. That kid still went to high school!

"Why? You asking me out?" Natasha laughed and pulled her blouse out of her skirt but she still didn't feel any better. Why were suits so fucking uncomfortable?

He shook his head in amusement. "No, no. I have a friend who might be someone for you."

She raised an eyebrow at him. She wasn't looking for anyone because she was already seeing Steve but that was their little secret. "Really?"

"Yeah. We served together. Great guy and good looking. Name's Josh Weisz." He pulled his phone out of his suit pocket. "You wanna see a pic?"

She shook her head. "No thanks. I'm not looking for something right now. I already have enough on my plate babysitting you guys." She smirked at him.

"I guess you do." He laughed and put his phone back into his pocket. "Lemme know if you change your mind."

I won't, she thought to herself. She liked what she had with Steve way too much to look somewhere else.

Back at the compound Rhodey went to the gym and she left to get to her quarters. Every Avenger had their own apartment except Steve who shared his with Bucky. Which meant that they always met at her place. She entered her security code and let herself into her apartment. The smell of baked goods greeted her. She walked into her kitchen and Steve was there and putting dishes back into her cupboards.

He turned around when he heard her high heels on the marble floor. "Hey." He beamed at her and her heart was fluttering in her chest.

She walked over to him and pressed her lips against him. Steve returned her kiss hungrily and lifted her onto the kitchen counter. "How did it go with Tony?"

He pushed her skirt up and growled when he saw that she was wearing stockings. She found out pretty early when they started this that he had a thing for stockings and garterbelts and she wore them often to drive him wild. He played with the lace of her stockings. "Well, he dropped his idea of home schooling him here but he wants to have a summer camp for Peter. He even started to look for bunk beds online."

"That's Tony." She rolled her eyes.

"How did it go with Talbot?"

She rolled her eyes again. "He was pissed that he had to meet with us peasants and not you but we managed to get everything done." He brushed his fingers over the inside of her thighs and she sighed happily. "What's in the oven?" Her kitchen smelled amazing.

"Apple pie. But it's not done for another thirty minutes." He grinned at her and then sank to his knees and buried his head between her thighs.

Oh that felt so good. She was sure this Weisz guy couldn't compete with Steve's talented mouth.

* * *

Tony wanted him and Bucky to test new training bots and they were punching their way through them in the gym.

Natasha and Wanda left for a trip with Pepper yesterday to celebrate her engagement with Tony. Nat sent him a pretty hot picture of her in her bikini and he could confirm that she did not look terrible in them at all. He desperately wanted to ask her what they were. Were they just hooking up or could he call her his girl? He was so distraced that one bot got a hit on him and he fell to the ground.

Bucky laughed. "Captain America defeated by some robot." He clapped his thigh and told FRIDAY to shut the simulation down.

He got up and walked over to the bench and grabbed two water bottles and handed one to Bucky.

"Thanks, punk."

They sat down on the bench and gulped the water down. They filled out Tony's question for the bot's evaluation on their Starkpads.

Bucky was already done and looking at him. "Hey what's that on your neck?"

"Huh?"

"You got a mark on your neck."

He looked at his reflection in the windows and could see a fading purple mark on his neck. Fuck! Nat left that there yesterday before she left with Wanda and Pepper. But he couldn't tell Bucky because they agreed to keep their thing between them. Well Nat asked him to and he went along with it.

"One of the bots must have landed another hit." He lied and hoped that he was convincing. Didn't Nat tell him ages ago that he was a terrible liar?

Bucky lifted an eyebrow at him. "Is there something you wanna tell me?"

"Nope." He found his sneakers really interesting right now and stared at them.

"You know I can tell when you're lying, right?"

"I'm not lying!"

"Oh Stevie, we both know that's a hickey." Bucky grinned at him smugly. "And I already have a suspicion who left it there."

"You're talking bullshit." He got up and threw his towel around his shoulders. Would Nat end things with him if word got out they were...well what were they exactly? They were having sex and he was in love with her. But did she feel the same or did she just want to have fun?

* * *

"Hey Cap!" Sam jumped on the couch next to Wanda who smacked him with a pillow.

Steve was sitting in an armchair and looking at Nat who was playing chess with Bucky at the table and from the tone of their voices they were both insulting each other in Russian but Bucky had this fond and amused look on his face that made Steve uneasy. Did Bucky like Natasha?!

"Steve!" Sam threw the pillow at him.

"Yeah"

"Have you already heard who's gonna move in?"

He furrowed his eyebrows. He had no idea what Sam was talking about. And no one was moving in without his approval or knowledge! "What are you talking about?"

"Sharon Carter is gonna live here. She's gonna be the CIA liasion. Weren't you crushing on her?" Sam grinned at him.

Sharon. _Peggy's niece._ The woman who he thought was just his neighbour and he tried to like her because he thought that Nat was with Clint. And then Clint suddenly had a wife and kids and the new Avengers moved into the compound and one evening Nat took his virginity and they had been sleeping together eversince.

He glanced at Nat who was still concentrated on her game with Bucky but he knew that she was listening. The Black Widow never missed anything.

"I wasn't crushing on her!" He huffed out and Wanda giggled. He suspected that she knew who he was really crushing on because of her powers. She was giving him these small and knowing smiles for two weeks now.

"You went to get coffee with her!" Sam argued. Yeah, he did because Nat told him to call her and he pretty much did anything she told him to. The correct expression for that was whipped if he wasn't wrong.

"Yeah and we talked about Peggy the whole time." He opened his book to signal that he was done with the toptopic and when he looked briefly over to Nat he could see the corner of her mouth twitching up. And something told him that it just wasn't because she annouched check mate to Bucky.

* * *

He and Nat were raiding a lab for a biohazard virus that a HYDRA splinter group was developing. Tony and Buck were with them and dealing with the HYDRA soldiers upstairs.

"I think that's it!" Natasha pointed at some kind of glass showcase with a vile in it.

"We found it." He informed Tony and Bucky through the comms.

"Roger that." Bucky replied.

"Maybe it's sex pollen!"

Nat groaned. "There's no such thing as sex pollen!" She looked at him like can you believe this guy? and he smiled at her. They still hadn't put a label on their relationship but Nat told him that she was only interested in him and that was enough for him for now. It had to be. He knew he should be happy that she even admitted that to him.

Suddenly the glass burst and the vile was broken. Someone fired a shot at it. "There's a sniper somewhere in the labs." Gas was surrounding him but he didn't feel anything. Maybe this virus was a bust and they came for nothing.

Then there were choking noises and he looked at Natasha who sank to her knees and wrapped her hands around her throat. She stared at him with big eyes and he felt hot and cold at once.

"Natasha?" He picked her up and ran to get her out of that lab.

She tried to answer him and only gasps left her mouth. She couldn't proberly breath and he feared that she would suffocate.

"Nat's hurt." He yelled and suddenly Tony flew down the hallway and took her from his arms.

"FRIDAY, scan her!"

"Her airways are swallowing and her lungs are filling with fluids."

Oh god both could kill her. Tony took with Nat off to get to the quinjet where they had medical supplies. He prayed to anyone listening that they could save her.

Het met Bucky outside and they both ran as fast as they could to the jet that was hidden in stealth mode in the forest a mile away. Before they entered the plane Bucky placed his hand on his shoulder. "She'll be okay. She's tougher than all of us combined."

"I..." He couldn't say it.

Bucky smiled at him. "I know, pal. It's written all over your face everytime you talk about her or she's in the room."

They walked up the ramp and Dr. Cho was on the screen and instructing Stark what to do. Natasha was out but stabil for now and they flew her to the next hospital were she was treated.

She would fully recover and he thanked Thor and every other deity for it. He didn't know what he would do if he lost her.

* * *

She hadn't been this close to death in ages and it changed something in her. Wasn't that what near death experiences did to people? They changed their diet, made up with someone or quit their job to chase after some dream?

Well, she wanted to do something she never did before. And it was the scariest thing she would ever do. She would tell Steve that she was in love with him and would offer him her heart. She knew that he wouldn't be sleeping with her for months if he didn't have some kind of feelings because he wasn't the guy to have meaningless sex but there was still a big chance that his feelings for her weren't love.

She got discharged from the hospital and was back at the compound. It had been quiet for the last two weeks and they didn't need to assemble. She tried to use that break for ways to confess her love but everything she came up with was either way over the top or just dumb. And there was still her fear of reaction.

She ran a few miles on the treadmill and came to the common kitchen to make herself a smoothie. Steve was already there and eating sandwiches. The amount of food both he and James ate each day was insane.

"Hi." He beamed at her and put the rest of his sandwich down.

He had mustard on his chin and she walked over and wiped his off his face. He looked confused and then smiled when he realized what she was doing. "Thanks,Nat." He looked around and then sucked her finger into his mouth to lick the mustard of.

God, he was so sexy. And cute. And funny. And kind. And stubborn. And smart. And so so sweet and good to her. "I love you." It just slipped out. That was not how she wanted to say it. Fuck!

Steve looked surprised and she tried to get ready for his rejection. But then his whole face lit up and he beamed at her. "Really?"

"Um, yeah." She smiled shyly because she got hopeful. "Should I say it again? I should say it again."

"If you want to." He smiled. "I want you to."

She nodded and hoped her voice was full of her love for him. "I love you, Steve."

"I love you, too. I have for a long time now." He cupped her face and kissed her.

This evening she took Steve's hand before they walked into the common room and snuggled against his side while they watched Stranger Things with the rest of the Avengers.


	2. Valentine's magic

_This oneshot takes place after Age of Ultron and before Civil war. Bucky lives with them at the compound anyway. He just showed up one day, okay. Just roll with it._

Wanda knew she wasn't an actual witch that could cast spells and turn people into toads. She was one hundred percent sure because she tried. But she still loved everything about magic and read Harry Potter countless times and watched Charmed in her room at HQ. She wasn't a witch even though they named her Scarlet Witch.

She read a lot of books about magic and witchcraft which amused Steve and Sam who sometimes brought her magic books from their missions. Natasha on the other hand knew surprisingly a lot about magic and witchcraft and when ever she asked her how she knew so much she just shrugged her shoulders and said a spy had to be able to blend in anywhere. She really needed to ask Clint when he came to visit if Natasha ever had to infiltrate a witch coven.

Next week would be Valentine's day and it was the first one without Pietro. He always gave her a gift on Valentine's day and made her promise that she would always be his date no matter if she had a boyfriend or not. Pietro was a ladies man but Valentine's day was reserved for her. She smiled sadly at the photo of her and her twin when they were ten. He was gone for ten months now and it still hurt so much. She didn't think it would get any easier. But she didn't want to be sad on Valentine's day and decided to work on a little project. She may couldn't cast love spells but her powers still were able to spread a little love. She still didn't really understand how her powers worked but she knew that she could sense the feelings of others and even control them. She couldn't change feelings but she could give them a push.

For example she knew that Steve and Natasha were in love with each other but both didn't make a move.

It didn't matter how many not so subtle comments both Sam and Bucky made, Steve wouldn't ask her out.

It didn't matter that Hill teased Natasha endlessly about Steve, she didn't tell him how she felt.

Rhodey just told them both separately that they could be glad that Stark wasn't that much around to witness this longing gaze and pinning contest. Steve blushed while Natasha glared at Rhodey when he told her that. She really liked Rhodey. He was direct but also had a calming presence. Whenever she felt overwhelmed she joined him in his medition sessions and he helped her calm down.

So her plan for this Valentine's Day was to get Steve and Natasha together. She just needed to come up with a plan and use her powers at the right time. And she needed to exploit the fact that all the other Avengers had a sweet spot for her and couldn't say no to her.

Steve and Natasha practically chased them through the woods for hours and Bucky was the only one besides their leader and second in command that didn't almost die. She, Sam and Rhodey almost didn't make it back to the compound. They were sweating through their clothes and heavy breathing. Natasha didn't have one drop of sweat on her body and still looked like she just came off the run way. She was walking in front of Steve and Wanda caught him looking at Natasha's ass. He blushed when he saw that he got caught and she just grinned at him.

They all showered and then met in the common kitchen for breakfast. Steve was flipping pancakes while Bucky made coffee. Natasha was already sitting at the table and reading something on her tablet. She looked up and nodded at her when she walked into the kitchen.

Sam and Rhodey came in not much later and they ate Steve's pancakes and talked about the movie they watched last night.

Time to set her plan into motion. "So... What are we gonna do on Valentine's day? It's my first one in America."

Sam smiled at her. "Kid, those are for people who are dating. None of us are dating." She could see out of the corner of her eyes that Steve looked at Natasha during Sam's statement. She hid her smile behind her coffee mug.

"I know that, Sam. But wouldn't it be nice to celebrate it anyway? To show how much we appreciate each other? Dress up and have a nice dinner?"

Natasha looked at her like she knew what her actual plan was. She sometimes wondered if Natasha could read minds too.

Rhodey shrugged his shoulders. "Why not. As long as we don't invite Tony or we'll have to spend the evening listening to him telling us how great he is.""

Bucky shoved the rest of his pancake into his mouth. "I'm in. I look good in a suit."

Steve sighed. "If we don't get called in, we can have a little party. Nothing too fancy though, Wanda."

She nodded and grinned. The plan was set in motion.

Next, she needed Bucky's help. Steve gave them the afternoon off and she found Bucky in the library of the facility. She knew that he was trying to catch up on all the things he missed while he was the Winter Soldier. She liked Bucky. He reminded her of Pietro.

* * *

"Hey Bucky."

He looked up from his book and put a bookmarker in it before closing it. "What's up?"

She walked over to him and sat down on the other couch facing him. "Can I ask you something? It's about Steve."

He placed the book down. "You can ask but there's a chance I might not answer it." She knew how protective Bucky was of Steve even though Steve was the stronger one of them now.

She smiled briefly at him. "It's nothing bad. Why does Steve not ask Natasha out on a date?"

Bucky laughed and threw his head back. "That obvious, huh?"

"Well, I can read minds. But he's not that subtle with his feelings. Everytime Natasha walks into the room Steve's whole face lights up. It's really cute."

Bucky crooked his head to the side and mustered her. "Wait, is that why you want us to have this Valentine's party?"

"Yeah." She nodded. "That's a reason but I also really want us to have a nice evening."

"Okay. Back to your question. I think that Steve still feels like that little shrimp he was before the serum when no woman looked twice at him. He doesn't think that a woman like Natasha who could have pretty much any man would go for him."

She lifted an eyebrow. "Could have any man?" Was Bucky interested in Nat? She watched enough CW to know that love triangles were a huge pain in the ass.

Bucky seemed amused. "I wouldn't say no if Natasha would make a move on me if Steve didn't have feelings for her. I'm just saying that girls as beautiful like her never saw how great Steve was and ignored him. I think he's scared that Nat's the same."

"She's not." She knew for a fact that Natasha was in love with Steve.

"I know. She isn't the only one that knows how to read people."

"So you're gonna help me?"

"You got a plan?"

She nodded and leaned forward to tell him about it.

* * *

Sam and Rhodey were the weekend over at some military convention and she was alone with Steve and Nat at the facility. Bucky liked to drive around to explore the area and left around noon. She liked it that he always got her something from his trips. Like candy or something. She lost her brother and he lost his sister and they both found something in each other to fill that gap.

She was about to walk around the corner to enter the long corridor when she saw that Natasha was standing on a ladder and fixing a light. Steve came from the other direction carrying files under his arm and Wanda did something she normally would never do but there was no doubt in her mind that Steve was fast enough to be there in time.

She gave the ladder a telekinetic push and Natasha lost her balance and fell. Steve threw the files away and ran towards her and just as Wanda knew he caught Natasha just in time.

"Um, thanks." Natasha sounded embarrassed and Wanda quickly took a few steps back so they wouldn't see her.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I don't know how that happened though."

"Good thing I was there to the save the pretty lady from her certain death."

"You did not just say that." Natasha laughed.

Their voices got quieter and she saw them through the windows walking down the parallel corridor. Well, Steve was walking because he was still carrying Natasha in his arms.

She said something to him and his cheeks turned red and he put her down.

This could be easier than she orignally thought it would be.

* * *

"When do you know you're in love with someone?"

Natasha stopped eating her burger and looked at her with wide eyes. They were in the shopping mall that was close to HQ and after spending a lot of money in the stores, they decided to get something to eat.

"Where's that coming from,Wanda?" She looked at her wary.

"I was just wondering. I've never been in love before." That was true. Due to her powers she knew how romantic love felt and she had to realize she never felt that for someone before.

"And you come to me for that?" Natasha actually sounded really surprised.

"You're my only female friend." She shrugged. "Have you never been in love,Nat?"

Something flickerd over Natasha's face and she was tempted to use her powers to find out what it was but it felt like it would be an intrusion. She was about to cross enough boundaries in the next days.

"I don't know." Natasha finally said. Was she lying or was she really not aware that she was in love with Steve?

"You don't know?"

Natasha observed the people behind Wanda and then looked at her with a hint of sadness in her eyes. "It's not like a grew up in an environment that encourage those feelings. I was not made for this stuff. You should ask Sam or Rhodey. They've had healthy relationships. I'm sure they can answer your question."

She seemed uncomfortable and Wanda was quick to change the topic. Maybe it wouldn't be that easy after all. Natasha was a tough nut to crack.

* * *

Two nights before Valentine's day she waited until she could be sure that Steve and Natasha were both asleep in their apartements in the private wing of HQ. She stood in front of their doors and let her energy enter their sleeping minds and gave them romantic dreams about each other. She didn't know what they were dreaming about but she just made sure it showed them their deepest desire- each other. She was kinda glad that she didn't know what they were dreaming because she didn't want to stumble into a sex dream or something.

Bucky helped her by turning off the surveillance because she had no idea how to do that without frying the security system with her powers.

The next morning only Steve showed up to their daily morning run and when Steve asked FRIDAY where Natasha was the AI told them that she was still alseep. Steve seemed worried because she was a early riser but FRIDAY assured that her vitals were normal.

Bucky came over to her. "Must be one hell of a dream you gave her." Bucky whispered into her ear and grinned.

"What are you two talking about?" Sam wanted to know.

"Why? Feeling unsecure, Wilson?" Bucky smirked and joined Steve in their routine of running laps around them and yelling "on your left" and "on your right". Usually Natasha would eventually elbow them in the rips and bring them to fall but she wasn't here today and so she, Sam and Rhodey had to endure their game. She was tempted to hit them with something but despite Steve and Bucky having a soft spot for her only Natasha could get away with punching them for some reason.

Natasha joined them at the breakfast table and seemed absent.

"Nat, are you okay?" Steve sat down next to her and looked at her with worry on his face.

"Huh?" She looked up from her plate. "Yeah, yeah. Just slept longer today."

"Had a nice dream?" Bucky asked and Wanda really wanted to kick his shin under the table but he was too far away. They were trying to be subtle here!

Natasha looked like someone slapped her. "It was one of those dreams that are really great and but you know they will never come true." She said with sadness in her voice.

"I know what you mean." Steve mumbled under his breath.

Crap that was so not how she had pictured it.

* * *

Today was Valentine's day and Steve and Natasha were in a meeting with General Talbot and the Secretary of Defense. Wanda used the time to prepare the final phase of her plan.

Thankfully the meeting took longer than scheduled and she and the rest of the Avengers left before Steve and Natasha to get to the restaurant where they were supposed to have dinner. In truth they didn't really left and she was glad that Sam and Rhodey weren't too disappointed that they wouldn't go to a fancy restaurant. And FRIDAY turned out to be a great partner in crime.

They hid in the bushes and watched Talbot and the Secretary leave. FRIDAY informed them that Steve and Natasha went to get changed for dinner. They had prepared a candle light dinner for them and FRIDAY promised to not let them leave the building.

They left their hiding spot in the bushes and sneaked back to the building. Wanda closed her eyes and searched with her powers for Steve and Natasha and when she found them she did something she would normally never do. She opened the door to their bottled up feelings making it impossible for them to ignore them any longer. It was like she opened a flood gate. Their feelings were now so strong that she could sense them without concentrating.

"Okay, I'm done." She said to the guys.

"Let's hope it works!" Sam pulled the collar of his coat up. "What now?"

"How does steak and horror movies sound?" Bucky asked. They did plan something to do while Steve and Nat hopefully would get together.

"Sounds great." Rhodey answered and offered Wanda his arm.

And that's how Wanda spent her first Valentine's Day in America with three handsome dates.

* * *

Steve just got out of the shower when something felt different. Maybe it was because it was Valentine's Day but all his feelings for Nat were just bursting out of him. He was glad that he wouldn't spend the evening alone with her but that the others would be there as well. Otherwise he would probably confess is love for her.

He chose to wear a suit without tie because Wanda said that she chose a fancy restaurant that had a dresscode. This was actually his first real Valentine's Day. Okay there were four other people but he still got to celebrate the day with the woman he loved.

There was suddenly a knock on the door. "Steve!" Natasha sounded agitated.

He opened the door and his breath got caught. She looked so beautiful in her black dress. "Wow, you look amazing." His heart was pounding so hard that he wa afraid she could hear it.

"We're locked in." She said with anger in her voice.

"What?"

"We can't get out. FRIDAY won't let us."

"What?"

Was that the only word he knew? "FRIDAY, what's going on?"

"Something is trying to get into my framework and I shut down everyhting to fight it off. I'm sorry Captain Rogers but until I manage to handle this, the place is on lockdown."

"And now?" Oh god, he couldn't be alone with her! He would do something stupid like kiss her or tell her he loved her and she would laugh in his face. Because a woman like her would never go for a guy like him.

It somehow looked like Natasha was figthing a battle inside her. "I'm starving."

He nodded. "Me too. Let's see if we can find something in the kitchen. I can't believe the others get to enjoy a fancy meal while we're stuck here."

They got to the kitchen and the table was covered with a white cloth and candles. Huh?

"Un-fucking-believable!" Natasha exclaimed when she saw the table. "They set us up!"

"What?"

"There is no attack on FRIDAY! They told her to lock us in!" Natasha crossed her arms and was practically fuming.

He touched her shoulder to calm her and felt a spark going through his body. Natasha's reaction told him she felt the same. Their was this energy between them now.

"Nat?"

"Please don't." She whispered.

"Don't what?"

"Just go to your room and forget everything." She looked at the ground.

He couldn't and he started to believe that maybe he was wrong and Nat did fesl the same. Every fiber of his body was concentrated on her. He was dizzy on the love he felt for her. He remembered being drunk and it almost felt like that. Only so much better.

"Natasha." He felt brave and cupped her cheek with his hand. His whole body was on fire. He was always able to bottle up his feelings for her but he couldn't fight it any longer. Something in him opened the flood gate.

She looked up to him and then grabbed his collar and crashed their lips together. He was startled at first but then kissed her back with everything he got. He always thought their first real kiss would be soft and gentle but this kiss was desperate, passionate and hungry. And he realized that he wasn't the only who had hidden his true feelings.

They pulled apart when they were both out of breath. Natasha's lipstick was all over her chin and her lips were swollen.

"This is a bad idea. This isn't gonna end well." She took a step back.

He followed her. "Who says it's gonna end?" Her eyes widened and he kissed her again before she could say anything.

They skipped dinner and went straight to her bedroom. It was the best Valentine's Day of his life.

He let Natasha train the others the next day and even Bucky was out of breath and sweating and cursing.


	3. Steve's girl

_Steve gets hit with an alien beam and thinks Natasha is his girlfriend_

* * *

One minute their fearless leader was standing tall on top of a building giving them orders on how to defeat the small army of aliens that came from a planet that no one besides Thor had ever heard about. The next minute Steve got hit by a purple beam and fell of the building. Natasha's heart stopped because she thought that Steve was falling to his certain death but Sam flew around the corner and managed to catch him.

Steve was unconscious and was brought to the Tower while the rest of them continued to fight off the aliens. In the end the aliens were inferior to them and fled away in their spaceship. Queens was saved but they were all worried about Steve.

Bruce was already done with his examination when she and Sam came to the infirmary to check on Steve. Tony briefed the major on the small invasion with Thor's help who was only sixty percent sure that Loki wasn't behind it.

Steve was still out in the hospital bed. "How is he?"

"He has no injuries. Nothing shows up on the scans. Unless Thor can tell us what that beam did we have to wait until he wakes up." He looked at Steve's medical file. "His vitals are strong. He should wake up soon."

Sam thanked Bruce and she left to take a shower. She hoped that Steve would be okay after he would wake up. The Avengers would be lost without him and she didn't want to lose one of the few friends she had. She didn't want to show it in front of Sam and Bruce but she was really worried. Who knew what that beam thing did to Steve. What if he wasn't Steve anymore?

She visited Steve the next morning who still remained unconscous. "You really need to wake up soon! Tony's eyeing your postion and with him as leader... We probably start the apocalypse or something."

Bruce came in and smiled kindly at her. "It's good that you're talking to him." He checked the monitor that showed his brain activity. "He reacts to voices. That's a good sign!"

He was about to leave but she stopped him. "Bruce? I think his eyelids are fluttering. Is he waking up?"

Bruce pulled a small flashlight out of his pocket and flashed Steve's eyes. "Steve? Can you hear me?"

His eyes opened and looked from Bruce to her. His eyes were really pretty. Did she notice that before? He looked at her in a way he never did before but she couldn't place what she saw in his eyes.

"Steve? How are you?" Bruce asked. "You scared us all a little bit."

"What..." His voice was hoarse."What happened?"

"You got it with alien tech and were out for a day."

Bruce looked at the monitor again and then checked his blood pressure. "Everything looks good. How are you feeling?"

Steve suddenly took her hand and laced their fingers together. She was too surprised to stop him. "Great knowing that my girl is by my side."

WHAT?

Bruce gave her a surprised look. "Oh I didn't-"

She shook her head lighty to tell him that they weren't together.

"Steve?" Bruce looked at him. "Who's your girl exactly?"

He lifted their interwined hands to his lips and pressed a kiss to the back of her hand. She felt a light shiver running down her spine. What the fuck was going on? "Natasha of course." Steve laughed like Bruce asked him a stupid question. "Nat is my girl. The most perfect girl in the world." He gave her a loopsided smile and she stared at him. She liked those words coming out of his mouth way to much.

"Um." Bruce coughed and the spell was broken. "I need to borrow Natasha for a minute. Excuse us."

She followed Bruce out of the room. "What the fuck happened?" She asked him.

"That beam must have changed his memories or gave him fake ones."

"Of me being his girlfriend?" She scoffed.

"Maybe that's not the only thing he remembers differently."He looked at her with an excusing look. "I don't know if telling the truth might hurt his brain. We can't trace anything in his brain but there is obviously something."

"Do you expect me to play his girlfriend?" Her voice got higher than she intended. She couldn't do that. Lie to Steve and play a role.

"I'm sorry but I think it's the best way to protect his brain."

She growled but agreed to the farce in the end. Bruce was the expert. He had seven PhDs and she had zero.

She really hoped Steve thought they were in the early stages of dating and she could get away with a few cheek kisses and hand holding from time to time until he remembered.

Bruce wanted Steve to stay another day at the infirmary and that gave her time to tell everyone what happened and to get them to play along. Tony looked way too happy about all of this and only after some colorful death threats he promised to hold himself back. Thor hadn't heard about anything like this happening before but he theorized that it would wear off after a few days.

The others visited and Steve showed no sign of altered memories with them. Of course it would only affect her. Fucking aliens! Sam tried to test the waters and asked Steve questions that she couldn't ask because she should have known the answer to those questions as his girl.

"He says you guys are together for three months. You wanted to keep it as a secret at the beginning." Sam told her after his visit. Damn that did sound like her though.

"Did he mention if we were...intimate?" She could say that she had her period but that gave her only a week. What if his weird amnesia would take longer?!

"You know he doesn't talk about stuff like that."

"Yeah." She was trained to play different roles. She could slip into any character but right now she was freaking out. "What am I supposed to do?"

"I don't know, Nat" He squeezed her arm. "I'm sorry. But is it really that bad?"

She was sure her eybrows were touching her hairline.

"You and Steve? I think you'd be great together."

"It's not like that between us. Never has been and never will be. I don't see him that way"

Sam looked like he didn't believe her and a small part of her didn't believe herself either. "Just think about it. Maybe it's a sign."

* * *

She was glad that Steve thought they were only dating for three months and not that they were living together. That way she could stay at her own floor. Steve got discharged by Bruce and as his girlfriend she naturally walked him back to his floor. She was just glad they didn't run into anyone in the elevator. She wanted to leave after she made sure that he didn't need anything and sat down on his couch but he smiled at her and patted his lap. Why did she feel like a dog right now? He probably thought that was something they did. She sighed an inaudible sigh and walked to the couch and sat besides him. He looked disappointed.

"You just got out of the infirmary." She explained and leaned her head on his shoulder to calm him. She thought a thoughtful girlfriend could react this way.

Steve wrapped his arm around her shoulder and she had to admit it felt really nice to be snuggled against him. He brushed his fingertips over her naked underarm and she became goosebumps. Fuck, what was going on?!

He turned the TV on and they watched the news and a documentary about Henry VIII. She checked the time and it was past 10 pm. That was a suitable time to leave, right? She entangled herself and faked a yarn. And she cursed herself for missing his body heat.

"I'm gonna go to bed now." She announced and stood up.

Steve got up as well and smiled. "Good idea." He grabbed her by the waist and pulled her against his chest. Was it wrong that she liked this side of him?"Let's go."

She was staring at his lips so it took her brain a moment to grasp what he just said. Wait, what? Did he mean together?! As in having sex? Girlfriends have sex with their boyfriends, you moron!

Steve was looking at her lips and leaning down to probably kiss her. He closed his eyes and got closer. Yup, he was definitely gonna kiss her. She was about to close her eyes but then she snapped out of it.

She pulled away and Steve gave her a concerned look. "You okay, doll?"

Her whole body melted at that nickname. Get it together, Romanoff. None of this is real.

"Um, I'm on my period." She lied and hoped that sex was off the table.

"Okay. Do you need me to make you a hot -water bottle?" Of course he would be that kinda boyfriend who would take care of his girl when she was on her period.

"No, thank you." She forced a smile out."I just need some rest. I see you tomorrow."

She left so fast she was surprised she didn't break the sound barrier. How was she supposed to pretend to be his girlfriend when she desperately tried to bury her feelings for him for ages? She was so royally fucked!

* * *

Steve showed up the next morning at her doorstep with ingredients to make pancakes. She was still in her pyjamas but Steve didn't seem to be bothered by that. Right, he probably thought he'd seen her in her pyjamas before.

He made pancakes in her kitchen and she watched him from the kitchen counter sipping on her coffee. They had breakfast before but never like that. He sat down next to her at the kitchen counter with the finished pancakes.

"Mm, they are really good." She moaned between bites. She could get used to Steve making her pancakes every morning.

He smiled at her. "I'm glad you like them, doll." There was that nickname again!

Steve suddenly leaned towards her and wiped something of her chin. He licked it off his thumb-chocolate syrup. He was still leaning towards her and so close that she could feel his breath on her face.

Okay Romanoff, you should really lean back. Like right now!

But instead because she was a fucking moron she moved closer to him and Steve's gaze fell from her eyes to her lips and then back to her eyes. He closed his and cupped her face with one hand. And like already stated she was a fucking moron and didn't pull away when he pressed his lips against hers.

She just couldn't. It felt way too good. He kissed her softly like she was something special and she couldn't stop kissing him back. Why didn't they kiss before? They could have been doing this for years!

He pulled away when they were both out of breath. They kissed for so long that her lungs were burning. He rested his forehead against hers and then kissed her again. This time deeper and when his tongue licked over the seam of her lips she opened them to let him in. She grabbed the collar of his shirt and pressed him closer to her. She couldn't think about anything else besides Steve kissing her. Nothing else mattered.

He pecked her lips and smiled at her. He whispered her name softly and she got chills all over.

"Steve" She whispered back in a way she never heard her voice before.

But then something changed and she could practically see how something snapped in Steve and he remembered again. "Oh God, I'm so sorry." He pushed her away and jumped of her kitchen chair.

She tried to ignore the pang of rejection in her chest. "Steve? Who am I to you?"

He turned around and looked sad. "You're not my girlfriend. I am so sorry I pushed you into that role, Nat. I don't know what I was thinking. It made me think I had what I always wan-"

"It's not your fault."

He tried to give her a smile but failed. "I'll get out of your hair. I'm sorry I kissed you. That was way out of line! You were just trying to help me."

He was already out of the kitchen and probably already halfway out of her apartment when something snapped in her. She was afraid of what she felt for him and where it could possibly lead but she knew that she wanted to keep kissing him. And she was the Black Widow and the Black Widow was not afraid of anything!

She ran out of her kitchen and he was already by her door. "Steve, wait!"

He turned around and she threw herself into his arms and kissed him. He tensed for a moment and she thought she made a horrible mistake but then he kissed her back. He wrapped his arms around her and turned to press her against the door.

"Really?" He smiled at her in the most beautiful way.

"Really!" She pulled his head down and kissed him again.


	4. Green-eyed monster

_She should be happy that Steve finally went out with one of the women she tried to set him up with but for some reason she wasn't._

* * *

It was Friday night and she didn't know what to do. She zapped through the channels but nothing good was on. Normally she would do something with Steve but he told her this morning at the Triskelion that he wouldn't make it because he asked Kristen out from Statistics. She almost dropped her cup of coffee when he said that he was going on a date. She had been throwing names at him for months and every time he turned the woman down. She thought the same thing would happen with Kristen but it didn't. He asked her out and like she knew she would Kristen said yes.

She should be happy that Steve finally went out with one of the women she tried to set him up with but for some reason she wasn't. She was annoyed that she was sitting at home like some wallflower while Steve went out and was probably having the time of him life.

Clint was on a mission in Cambodia and she didn't really have any friends besides him and Steve. Maybe she should just take a hot bath and then read some novel in her bed but she wasn't an old lady yet. She was 30 years old, she should be having the time of her life as well.

She pulled a body and a leather skirt out of her closet and drove to the hottest club in DC. There was a line at the entrance but she knew the bouncer and he let her in without her having to wait an eternity. The music was loud and she could almost feel it vibrating through her body. She immediately went on the dancefloor and moved to the beat. She was just having fun dancing on her own when some dude decided that he had to grab her waist and rub against her ass. She stepped with the heel of her shoes on his foot, turned around gave him an innocent smile and left.

She went to the bar to order a vodka tonic when another guy thought he should try his chance with her. He was a nice-looking guy but she wasn't in the mood for a hook up. She emptied her drink and left the club. It was only 11:33 pm and she didn't want to drive home yet. She knew that a bakery that sold cake-pops was still open and not that far away.

She drove to it and waited in line to order when she heard Steve's voice. What the hell was he doing here? She looked over her shoulder and Steve held the door open for Kristen who looked smitten by it. She rolled her eyes, Steve held the door open for pretty much anyone. It was not that special. It was almost midnight and they were still on their date? It must be going well then.

"Miss?"

She turned around to realize that it was her turn to order. She said what she wanted and paid for her order. The girl handed her the box of cake pops (she ordered way too much and had enough for the entire weekend) and she hoped that she could leave without Steve and Kristen noticing. She was already at the door when Steve called her name out in surprise.

She turned around. "Hey. I didn't see you there." She lied and smiled at them.

Kristen grabbed Steve's arm almost possessively. Weird. "Romanoff, what a surprise."

"Yeah." Steve gave her one of his boyish smiles. "Are you alone here? Do you wanna join us?"

She almost laughed at the face Kristen made. That woman was not happy with Steve's suggestion.

"I was just leaving." She grabbed the door knob. "I see you guys at work. Have a nice night." She waved at them and then left the bakery.

Would he take Kristen home or go home with her? Why was she wondering about that? She got into her car and raced home.

* * *

She was sitting in the cateria poking with her fork through her lunch ( would it really kill Fury to give an actual cook clearance to work here?!) when she saw Steve coming in. She hadn't seen him all morning and ignored his call on Saturday. He spotted her and walked into her direction when someone yelled his name. Kristen!

She was sitting with a few other agents at table at the other end of the cafeteria. Steve gave her an excusing and sheepish look and walked to Kristen and her friends. Why did she feel she was in high school and the quarterback just rejected her to sit with the other popular kids? She clenched her jaw and finished her over-cooked pasta.

She ran into Steve later that day when she was on her way to her office because Hill kept on pestering her to finally write the report about the Lima mission. She hated paperwork but Hill was her superior and could put her on the bench if she wanted to.

"Hi, Nat." He smiled at her kindly."Did you do something different with your hair?"

"No."

"Oh, well it looks nice." He was about to walk away when she called his name. "Yes?"

"There is this new art gallery with pieces I think you like. You wanna go there later?"

Steve smiled and she thought he would say yes but then his smile dropped a bit. "I can't, sorry. I promised Kristen to help her with something."

 _Of course_. She was disappointed but gave him a small smile. "Don't I know how to pick them? Have fun." She walked to her office before he could say anything else. Would Kristen take all his free time now? Probably.

Why should he hang out with her if he could go on dates. Great she managed to make a another friend besides Clint and then Steve dropped her to get some.

* * *

As far as she knew Steve went out on two more dates with Kristen during the week until they got called on a mission in Mongolia. Fury wanted them to take out a small terrorist group that threatened to wipe out a minority in the region. Steve hated kill missions but he knew that they were sometimes necessary. They couldn't show up with a big team without drawing Russia's attention and Fury wanted to avoid that at all costs. Captain America and Black Widow were more effective than an entire SWAT team.

The terrorist group didn't have a lot of members but an impressive amount if weapons of war that were most likely provided by Russia. They had taken out all members within twenty minutes and destroyed their arsenal. They couldn't immediately fly back to the Triskelion because a storm was coming and they didn't get the clearance to take off.

They had to take shelter at the safehouse a few miles away from the terrorist group cell. Well house was an exaggeration. It was more a cabin than an actual safehouse because SHIELD was rarely in Mongolia and a high function safehouse wasn't necessary.

The cabin was well hidden in the woods and no one would find it without the coordinates. Steve opened the door and she followed him inside. She was starving and wanted to head straight for the kitchen to check the inventory, every safehouse had canned soups and other duarable food.

There was no kitchen, just a kitchenette because the cabin was only one room. With one bed. She could basically feel the panic radiating of Steve. It wasn't the first time they were alone at a safehouse but the first time with only one bed and Steve came from a different time.

"You can take the bed." He immediately offered. "I'll take the floor."

She looked at the bed. It was big enough for the both of them but she didn't want to make him uncomfortable. "Thank you, Steve. That's very sweet of you."

He blushed and smiled at her shyly. She smiled back and raided the kitchenette for food. She found tomato soup and noddles and threw both into a pot. Steve was in the bathroom getting out of his uniform and into more comfortable clothes. Was it bad of her to be happy that they were stuck here for a night so she could finally spend time with him without having to worry that Kristen was going to foil her plans. He got out of the small bathroom and she went in to get out of her catsuit and slipped into yogapants and a SHIELD hoodie. When she came back Steve was already pouring the soup into bowls and they ate it in silence sitting on the bed. The soup wasn't the best she ever had but it was okay.

She rinsed the bowls in the sink and put them put into the cupboard. When she turned around Steve had already build his "bed" on the floor and her back hurt just from looking at it. She knew that he was as a soldier used to sleeping on hard grounds but his place for the night was just inacceptable. Sweet Steve left most of the pillows and blankets on the bed for her and only grabbed a thin wool blanket to cover the floor.

"Steve?"

"Yeah?"

She walked over to him and picked up the wool blanket and threw it over the only chair in the room. "You can't sleep like that."

"It's okay. I want you to have the bed." He went to get the blanket again.

She grabbed his elbow to make him turn to her. "We can both sleep in the bed." He looked ready to object so she quickly added that they could put a pillow border between them.

"Steve, please. Don't let me be the girl who let Methuselah sleep on the hard and dirty floor." She batted her eyelashes playfully at him.

His mouth curved into a smile. "I am not that old! Okay, we share the bed."

Just like she promised she put a pillow and a rolled blanket between them and laid down on the left side of the bed. Steve got under the blankets on the other side and said good night. She wished him the same and fell soon asleep.

The next morning she woke up with a warm body pressed against her back. She panicked for a moment but relaxed when she realized that it was Steve and that they were in a safehouse in Mongolia. She snuggled more into his embrace and was already dozing off again when she noticed something. Why the hell was she cuddling with Steve? And why did she like it so much? Steve sighed in his sleep and buried his face in her neck. His breath against her skin sent a shiver down her spine and she felt herself getting aroused.

No, nope that was wrong. She moved slightly but he wouldn't let go of her and pressed himself completely against her. She gasped when she felt something poking her lower back. Holy hell, God bless America! She was really tempted to rub herself against him but that would have been completely over the line and probably assault and so she entangled herself from him without waking him up.

She splashed water into her face when she got into the bathroom and tried to put herself together. Was she sexually attracted to Steve? No! That was ridiculous! He was Steve. Dorky Steve. Steve who made her laugh and brought her a caramel latte everyday to work. Steve who had such a sweet smile and the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen. Steve who... Fuck, was she... Did she have feelings for him? Was that the reason why it bothered her so much he was going on dates with Kristen? Because she was jealous?

There was a knock on the door. "Nat? You okay?"

"Yeah!" She changed quickly into her catsuit. "I'll be out in a sec!"

They left shortly after because they got the okay to fly back to the States. Natasha didn't talk much because she was trying to sort out her feelings and thoughts. She was pretty sure she was falling in love with Steve and any chance she might have had she blew by setting him up with Kristen. Boy, she was such a dumbass. She liked waking up in his arms, she wanted to do that again. She wanted to do more than that.

"A penny for your thoughts." Steve interrupted her train of thoughts.

"Huh?"

He smiled at her kindly and she cursed the butterflies in her stomach. "You looked pretty deep in thought. Just curious what's going in your mind."

She felt her cheeks getting warm. There was no way she would tell him what she had been thinking about.

"It's nothing." She waved him off. "Hey, how is it going with Kristen?"

She could swear that Steve grimaced for a second. "She's nice..."

She felt a but coming. Please let there be a but!

"But I don't know..." He blushed a bit and looked to the ground. "She's not the one I want to take on dates and she seems to know that."

There was another girl?! Seriously?! She had spend months looking for someone right for him and he already had someone in mind?! "Who is it?"

He blushed even harder. "I'd hoped she would have find it out on her own."

What the fuck was that supposed to mean? "Tell me her name and I set you two up." Why did she just say that? She didn't want Steve to date another girl! She wanted him to take her to her favourite bakery and share a box of cake pops and then take him home.

He sighed and played around with his seatbelt. "I only went out with Kristen because I realized the girl I want doesn't want me or she wouldn't try to set me up with every girl in SHIELD ." His face was now completely red. "You never threw your name in the ring, Nat."

Wait, what?! Her eyes widened in surprise and her heart started racing. "What?" She whispered.

"I kept hoping that you would ask me out but I realized that will never happen. So I thought I should try to go out with one of the girls you suggested. That was probably not fair to Kristen."

He liked her too? She set the plane on autopilot and unbuckled her seat belt. She got up and sat down on his lap. He looked up at her in surprise and she cupped his face. "To be honest I only recently realized that I like you more than just a friend." She admitted and he beamed at her.

She pressed her lips softly against his and he wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her back.

"So does that mean you'll go out with me?" He whispered against her lips.

She laughed, what a dork! "Yeah, I'll go on a date with you." She kissed him again and let Steve explore her mouth.

Look, did she plan to have sex with Steve for the first time on the cot in the back of a SHIELD quinjet? No.

Did she regret having sex with Steve for the first time on the cot of the back of a SHIELD quinjet? Hell no!

And did she blush and giggle like a schoolgirl when Steve picked her up for their first date and told her she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen? Maybe.

* * *

 **Send me some ideas or prompts and I might turn it into a one-shot if the muse tickles me**


	5. It's always been you

_On the flight to Siberia Bucky helps Steve realize some things._

 _Minor spoilers for season 2 of Jessica Jones_

* * *

They still had hours until they would land in Siberia to face off an army of Winter Soldiers. Steve didn't know what Zemo wanted with them but it definitely wouldn't be something good. Facing whatever waited for them in Siberia would have been so much easier if the other Avengers would be with them. He hoped he and Bucky were enough to handle this mission. And then he had to deal with whatever happened to his friends. He felt a pang in his heart when he thought about Natasha. He should have taken her with them. He should have thrown her other his shoulder and ran with her to the quinjet. But no he left her behind. What would happen to her now? She had so many enemies because of her past, what if she got arrested and would be deported to Russia?

He looked over to Bucky who had been silent since they boarded the plane and left Leipzig. He had no idea what to ask him. Where have you been in the last two years? Didn't you know I was looking for you?

"Steve?" Bucky suddenly broke the silence.

"Yeah?"

"What will happen to your friends now?"

He sighed. "I don't know. I'll deal with it." He didn't want Bucky to feel guilty about that.

"I don't know if I'm all of this worth."

"None of this was your fault."

"I know. But I still did it."

They had been silent for some time and Steve's thoughts wandered back to Natasha. Would he ever see her again? Was she on the run now? He highly doubted that he could find her if she went into hiding.

Bucky suddenly spoke up again. "That redhead at the airport. What's her name?"

Steve was suprised at that but answered him nonetheless. "Natasha Romanoff."

"Why did you kiss the blonde when you got that redhead?"

"What?" Where had that been coming from? God, he didn't even think about Sharon at all in the last hours. Why had he kissed her? He knew it was wrong the moment their lips touched.

"I saw how you looked at Natasha when you thought you had to fight her in that hangar. You looked like someone ripped your heart out. You didn't have that expression when you had to fight your other friends."

"It's not like that between her and me." He wanted it to be like that between him and Natasha but he knew that she didn't feel the same. She was even the one who encouraged him to date Sharon who turned out to be Peggy's niece and that alone was fucking weird. He wouldn't be surprised if Peg would raise from the dead to punch him in the face.

"But you want it to be like that between you and her." Bucky stated with conviction.

He was tempted to deny his feelings like he had done so many times when Sam asked him. But he couldn't lie to Bucky. He never could and he didn't think he could start now. "Yes. But it's onesided. She doesn't see me that way."

Bucky gave him a sympathetic look. "She told you that?"

"Um, no. I just know."

Bucky rolled his eyes. "You just know? Who are you, Nostradamus?! How do you want to know that if you never made a move on her, punk?"

"I just know, okay!" He felt himself getting angry. Natasha not returning his feelings was a sore spot for him. He wasn't mad at her, no of course not but it still hurt him that the woman he was in love with didn't return those feelings. "She never showed any interest in me like that. She actually wanted me to ask Sharon out. The blonde I kissed."

He was sure that Natasha didn't love him when they had met during his search for Bucky in India. He hadn't seen her since DC and when she had suddenly been standing in front of him with a smirk on her face he knew that he loved her. She had tracked him down to give him more intel about Bucky and they had spend the day together. Exploring the town and getting caught up with people celebrating the Holi festival. He had thought that she wanted to leave but she grabbed a paint bomb and threw it a him. She laughed at him and they spent the afternoon throwing paint pulver at each other. Someone pushed Natasha and she landed in his arms. She looked up at him laughing and she was so beautiful in that moment and he felt bold and leaned down to press his lips against hers. Natasha stopped laughing and stepped out of his embrace. It felt like someone punched him in the gut, she didn't want him like that. Natasha left shortly after and they never spoke about that day ever again.

"Steve? You still here?"

He blinked a few times. "Yeah. Sorry, I got carried away."

"I think Natasha has feelings for you."

He arched an eyebrow. "And why would you think that? You don't know her!"

"No, I don't. But I know that she just risked everything to let you escape. Her freedom and for a spy that means everything. She wouldn't have done that for anyone. But she did it for you. And I think she did it because she loves you."

No, that couldn't be true. Natasha probably did it because she thought she owed him for something. That how she worked. "I don't think so."

Bucky gave him a small smile. "Just let that thought sink in for a second."

Did she really help them because she loved him? Maybe she did love him but that didn't have to mean that she was _in love_ with him. There were different kinds of love. The love he had for Bucky was different than his love for Natasha. But she did sound heartbroken when he asked her on the phone in Vienna if she was going to arrest him. Maybe Bucky was right... But what if he never would get the change to ask her. He somehow had the feeling that everything would be different after Siberia and facing the Winter Soldiers.

* * *

Ten months later

Natasha walked through the entrance of the apartment complex she lived in carrying her shopping bags. The supper Oscar was fixing the lights of the hallway and his son Vido was playing on the floor with his toys.

The kid saw her and waved. "Hey Savannah!"

She smiled at him and checked her mail box for mail but of course it was empty. Not that anyone knew she was back in New York. She had dyed her hair blonde, put in brown contact lenses and spoke with a southern accent.

"Hi Vido." She walked over to him and his dad. Her new persona Savannah was friendly to her neighbours. Not too friendly because she didn't want anyone to recognize her but she didn't want to seem suspicious by ignoring everyone in the buidling.

He held his toy up. She looked at it and realized that it was a Captain America action figure and tried not to show any emotion. She remembered how Steve was against of giving his likeness for the dolls but changed his mind when she told him that he would make a lot of kids happy and that he could donate the money he would get from the sales.

"Do you know Captain America?" Vido suddenly asked her and she thought for a second her cover was blown. Did a ten year old kid see through her?

"What?" She laughed and hid her nervousness.

"Do you know Captain America? Lots of people pretend that he doesn't exist anymore since he's now a war criminal or something." Vido said and played with little Cap's shield. She knew from her one visit to Tony that he now had the shield and she was too afraid to ask why he had it. "I still think Captain America is a hero. I hope he comes back. He's my favourite Avenger!" Vido announced.

She smiled at him again. "Well, I never met him but he's my favourite Avenger too." Only the first part of that sentence had been a lie.

Oscar was done with the lights and came down from his ladder. "You wanna join us for dinner, Savannah?"

He was a nice and attractive man but he wasn't the one she wanted to have dinner with. "Thanks for the invite but I have already plans." She smiled briefly at him and walked to the elevator.

She leaned against the door when she got into her apartment trying to control her feelings. She did her best to not think about Steve but seeing Vido with his Captain America action figure didn't exactly help. She missed him so much even though she had no right. It took her some time to admit it to herself but she was in love with him and his absence in her life was almost painful for her. She didn't know where he was. All she knew was that he had send Tony a burner phone. She wondered if Sharon got one too or if they were together now somewhere. It was like someone punched her in the gut when Sharon excitedly told her that Steve had kissed her when she contacted Sharon so she would help Steve break the others out of the Raft. Of course, Steve would fall in love with a perfect girl like Sharon and not some broken assassin with an ugly past like her.

A week later she ran into Vido and his dad again. The wall in the hallway needed new paint and Vido helped Oscar. She was with her back to the door when it opened because she was checking her mail (she only got catalogs and maybe she would buy herself some new clothes) and Vido was telling her a story about school. Funny how her only friend now was a ten year old kid.

Vido suddenly stopped his story and when she looked up from the cataloge he was staring at something behind her with wide eyes. "Oh my God! That's Captain America!"

What?! She heard a shh sound behind her and turned around. It really was Captain America and her heart skipped a beat. Steve's hair was longer and he was sporting a beard now and holy fuck he looked so fucking good with this look.

"Hey." He whispered to her and gave her a small smile. How on earth was he here now? How did he find her?

"Papá! That's Captain America!" Vido muttered behind her under his breath.

"Shh!" She heard Oscar say. "I'm sure he doesn't want everyone to know that. Come." She heard footsteps and Vido asking his dad how Captain America knew Savannah.

"Hi." She finally whispered back and didn't know what to do or to say. Why was he here? Did he have a mission for her?

"Could we maybe go to your place before more people realize I'm here?" Steve asked and scratched the back of his head.

She got out of her trance. "Sure."

They got to her apartment in silence and thankfully no one crossed their path. She hoped that Vido would keep his mouth shut. Ross was still out there wanting to arrest them. She unlocked her door and turned around to ask him how he found her when he was suddenly cupping her face and kissing her. Her eyes widened in surprise but she kissed him back after a moment because his lips on hers was the most amazing thing she ever experienced. She stood up on her tiptoes and looped her arms around his neck to pull him closer to her. She had no idea why Steve was kissing her but she didn't care as long as he kept kissing her. She heard the door close, Steve probably kicked it shut, and he wrapped his arms around her waist. No one had ever kissed her like this before. If she had to describe the perfect kiss it would be this one. She licked over the seam of his lips and he opened them to let her tongue in. He was right he didn't need pratice. She sucked on his lower lip and he moaned softly into her mouth. She was such an idiot for claiming that everyone needed pratice. He was a fucking natural! She never wanted to stop kissing him. His hand travelled to her ass and he slid his hand into her back pocket. He got probably shy and wasn't brave enough to grab her ass. Maybe he did need a little practice after all. She smiled into the kiss and was about to slide her hands down his back to his behind when something hit her. He did have practice! With Sharon! He was with Sharon! What the fuck were they doing!

She pulled away from the kiss and Steve immediately followed her to kiss her again. She shook her head and took a step away from him. His lips were swollen and wet from her kisses and his hair tousled from her roaming hands and he had a confused look on his face. "I'm sorry, Nat. I thought you wanted it too."

"I did, I do." She admitted quietly and Steve smiled and moved closer. "But we can't!"

His smile dropped. "Why not?"

"You know why!" She couldn't look at him. She was a lot of things but she didn't want to be a cheater.

"No, I really don't. I hoped you felt the same!"

She looked at him and she couldn't decipher what she saw in his eyes. "What about Sharon?" She asked him.

He seemed confused. "Sharon? What about her?"

"Aren't you two a couple?"

"What? No!"

She knew that he was telling the truth. He would never lie about something like this. Had she been reading way too much in his kiss with Sharon?

"Why are you here, Steve?"

He smiled at her softly. "Because I missed you. So fucking much." He paused and cupped her cheek and she leaned into the touch. "And because I love you and I'm kinda hoping you feel the same." He looked at her nervously.

She grabbed the collar of his jacket to pull him down, she pressed her lips against his and kissed him softly. "I love you." She whispered between kisses and he smiled against her lips.


	6. Saint Patrick's Day

_It's Saint Patrick's Day and Natasha uses the holiday to get what she wants from Steve._

* * *

Today was Saint Patrick's Day and Natasha promised to come by his place to help him pick out some of his drawings for a charity auction for a children hospital here in Brooklyn. He heard how people were walking through the streets and celebrating the holiday. Maybe Nat would go with him to some bar later to get green-coloured beer. He was an American with every fiber of his being but he still wanted to do something nice to honour his Irish parents.

His doorbell rang and he got up from the floor where his drawings were scattered around to answer his door.

Nat was on the other side of the door smiling brightly at him. She wore jeans and a green sweater under her leather jacket and had a cloverleaf-headband on her head. He couldn't help but grin at her she looked adorable.

She turned her face slightly and pointed at her cheek. "Kiss me, you're Irish."

"That's not how the saying goes."

She tapped her cheek again. "Kiss me, you're Irish."

He faked an annoyed sigh so she wouldn't realize how much he would enjoy giving her a kiss, even if it was only on her cheek. He pressed his lips on her soft skin and quickly pulled back before she noticed how much he had liked that. He knew that she was just teasing him and he didn't want to show her that he wanted to kiss more than her cheek. It would just complicate their friendship and her friendship meant everything to him.

She smiled at him and walked past by him into his apartment. She had helped him find the place in Brooklyn and spent countless hours with him in hardware stores, furniture shops and at IKEA to make this apartment a home. He sometimes wondered if she knew that he felt more for her than friendship.

She slipped out of her boots and jacket and sat down on the floor picking up some of his sketches of Prospect Park and inspected them. He joined at her on the floor and just watched how she looked at his drawings and stacked the ones on a pile she thought were appropriate for the auction. The cloverleafs on her headband whipped everytime she moved her head and he wished he had the courage to ask her out on a date. But even if he did find the courage to ask her, he was sure that she would say no. She never showed any sign that she wanted more than friendship from him and a woman like her would never go out with a guy like him. Nat was so out of his league and he should just be thankful that she was his friend.

"These are amazing, Steve!" She praised and his cheeks were getting warm. "But do you have more personal ones? These are just sketches of trees and buildings. Did you maybe draw us? I'm sure drawings of the Avengers made my Captain America would make lots of money!"

He did have a sketchbook full of sketches of his team mates. But he didn't really want to show her that book because the majority of those drawings were of her. She looked at him intensely and he feared that she somehow could read his mind.

"You do have some sketches of us, don't you?" She grinned.

"Um,yeah!"

"Show me!" Her face lit up and he couldn't say no. He got up and went to his bedroom to get the sketchbook. He prayed that she would overlook the fact that so many of the sketches were of her.

He walked back into the livingroom with the book and Nat made grabby hands and he gave it to her laughing. Would he ever be able to say no to her? Probably not.

She flicked through the book and the first few pages were sketches of the whole team and portraits and so far she didn't show up more often than the others but that changed after a few more pages and he saw how Natasha furrowed her eyebrows and he couldn't tell what that meant. Did she see through him and now realized that he was in love with her?

"These are beautiful, Steve." She breathed out and then pointed at one page. It was a drawing of her that showed her laughing with her nose wrinkled and her head thrown back. He remembered that moment clearly. He had told her a story and she had laughed a full belly laugh and he realized in that moment that he loved her and he thought that his love for her was noticeable in the way he had drawn the picture and he hoped she wouldn't notice it.

"Please don't sell this one, Steve. It's... It's too personal..." She whispered out.

"Never." He promised and for the first time he allowed himself to wonder if maybe his feelings weren't onesided. His heart almost stopped beating when she leaned forward and pressed her lips briefly on his cheek. She hadn't kissed him on the cheek since DC and every fiber of his body was on fire. He was almost embarrassed that a simple kiss on the cheek would cause such a reaction in him.

"What was that for?" He managed to rasp out.

"Because you're Irish!" She grinned at him but he swore that he saw more in her eyes.

They chose to add a few more sketches of the team to the pile and he put them into a portfolio. "I'm gonna drop them off at the gallery. You wanna come with me? Maybe go to a bar afterwards?"

"Sure." She nodded.

The gallery wasn't that far away from his place and they decided to walk. They dropped the portfolio off and walked by people in green who celebrated Saint Patrick's Day.

Right in front of the bar Natasha stopped and tapped on her cheek again. "Kiss me, you're Irish!"

He playfully rolled his eyes at her but leaned down to do what she wanted. Did he imagine things or did her breath hitch when he kissed her cheek?

The moment was ruined when some random guy tipped her on the shoulder. "I'm Irish, too!" He yelled and was about to lean forward to probably kiss her.

"No, thanks!" She harshly said and pushed him away and walked into the bar.

The guy wanted to follow her but Steve blocked his way. "Don't!" He growled. "You heard the lady. Get lost!"

"Sorry. Didn't know she was your girl!"

The guy left. Steve almost yelled after him that Nat wasn't his girl but she collected three cheek kisses from him today and didn't want that guy to kiss her. Probably because he was a stranger, he reminded himself. But maybe, just maybe she wanted him to kiss her because she liked him more than just as a friend? Was that possible?

He turned around and Nat was already at a table with two green beers. It looked like she rejected another guy who wanted her to kiss him. Steve decided in that moment to try something. If he would get rejected, he could just say it was Saint Patrick's Day.

He walked into the bar and slid into the booth to sit next to her. She seemed a bit surprised that he didn't choose to sit on the other side of the table but she didn't tell him to sit somewhere else.

"Kiss me, I'm Irish" He said and tapped with his finger on his lips.

Natasha grinned and leaned forward. "I thought you'd never ask." She whispered against his lips and then gave him the best kiss of his life.


	7. Public display of affections

_Nat is the one who gives Steve and Sam their gear back_

* * *

Tony would probably be pissed that she took a detour into the armory of the CIA base after talking to T'challa but she owed Steve one. She knew that Steve had contacted Sharon which hurt Natasha but Agent Carter couldn't sneak their gear out without raising Ross' suspicion. And a little voice in her head told Natasha that she wanted to be the one to give Steve his shield back. Yes, she had said that it was the government's property but Steve was the only one worthy of carrying it.

Ross didn't suspect a thing and let her burrow a car when she said that she wanted to meet one of her contacts to help them track down Steve and the others. She disabled the tracking device so no one could follow her. Better be safe than sorry.

She had to laugh at the choice of their getaway car. Steve really wasn't made for stealth missions. Three buff dudes in a tiny car wasn't noticeable at all. He was leaning against the door of the car and seemed suprised when she got out of her car. Right, he expected Sharon.

Steve crossed his arms over his chest. "Are you here to arrest us?"

Ouch, that hurt. "No!" She snapped and opened the trunk of the car. "I was actually going to give this back to you but if you don't want it..."

His face softened. "I'm sorry, Nat! I didn't mean it like that." He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "Things are just weird now. I shouldn't have said that."

"We might disagree on the Accords but I'm still your friend, Rogers!"

He smiled at that. "I know."

Steve got his shield and Sam's wings out of the trunk and put them into the one of the VW. Sam waved at her and Barnes avoided any eye contact and pushed his hands against Sam's seat.

Steve walked back to her in front of the VW. "Thank you, Nat! You didn't have to do that. Ross will probably be pissed if he finds out you gave us our gear back."

She just shrugged her shoulders. She had dealt with worse men than Ross.

Steve pointed at her neck. "I'm sorry that he... The Bucky I know would never..."

She couldn't resist the urge to touch him and placed her hand on his arm. He was just wearing a T shirt and her hand touched his skin. "Shh, it's okay. I know what he's going through. I know that he wasn't himself."

Steve seemed relieved at that and nodded. "Thank you for understanding. I'm really sorry though." He seemed to think about something. "There's still room for one more in the car."

That offer suprised her more than anything that had happened in the last days and she was really tempted to join them. "I know I'm small but I think you three have already taken up all the space ."

Steve looked disappointed but nodded. "Okay. I just thought that with you giving us our stuff back... You maybe changed your mind."

She sighed. Didn't he see that she could accomplish more if she stayed on the Accords' side? That she could look out for him that way? "I'm sorry. I meant what I said. Signing the Accords is the only way to stay in the game."

Steve wanted to say something but she continued. "I know we disagree on this and I think it's mostly because you're a stubborn ass!" Steve grinned at that. "But I still got your back, no matter what. Don't forget that!"

Steve smiled and took a step towards her and lowered his head. She was about to ask him what he was doing when he cupped her cheek and pressed his lips against hers. She was a bit confused but then she grabbed his shirt and kissed him back. She didn't know how long they kissed, maybe a minute, maybe ten minutes but that kiss was definitely in her personal Top 5 maybe even Top 3.

She had to pull away when her lungs started to burn and rested her forehead against his. "Was that your second kiss since 1945?"

"Shut up!" He laughed. And then he said softly, "Yes."

She had to smile. She really liked the fact that she was the only woman who got to kiss him in this century. She wanted to kiss him again but a low whistle snapped them out of their moment.

They looked over to Sam and Barnes who were grinning smugly at mostly Steve.

"I thought public display of affections made people very uncomfortable!" Steve huffed out.

She snorted. "Clearly your pals didn't get the memo!" She pinched Steve in the ass and saluted Sam and Barnes at the same time. Sam clapped and even Barnes seemed quite amused by that.

"Hey!"

She smirked at Steve but then got serious again. "I have to go now."

Steve nodded. "I know. We..."

"Don't tell me where you're going."

"Okay." He scratched the back of his neck. "Can we talk about what just happened? Maybe over dinner when this is all over?" He was blushing and couldn't look her in the eyes. Moments ago Steve was kissing her and now he was back to his flustered self. She couldn't help but find it charming.

"Are you asking me on a date knowing that you have to be on the run for an unknown amount of time?"

Steve got even redder. "Um, yes?"

She grinned. "Lucky for you I find the wanted man thing kinda sexy."


	8. Trouble in paradise

**_For Sportsfan64; sorry you had to wait so long! I'm not so sure if that's what you wanted but I hope you like it!_**

 _Steve and Natasha have been dating for a few weeks when they get into their first fight_

* * *

Dating Steve was something completely new for Natasha. Sure, she had been with men before but she wouldn't have called those guys her boyfriends. But she guessed Steve was now her boyfriend after he sheepishly asked her after their fourth date if he could call her his girl. Her first instinct was to say that she didn't belong to anyone but she knew that Steve didn't want to own her but just wanted to know where this thing between them was heading. Seven weeks later she was still surprised that he had found the courage to ask her on a date and she was even more surprised that she had said immediately yes.

But things changed between them since they started dating. She loved the changes in their private life, cuddling on the couch watching movies, holding hands, being able to kiss Steve whenever she wanted and her personal favourite was to wake up next to him in the morning.

But she didn't particularly like the changes in their professional life. It seemed now that Steve would always make sure that she was out of any possible danger during missions. Really, it didn't matter if she was there with them or sitting somewhere drinking a cocktail. Did Steve suddenly forget that she was the Black Widow?!

Like right now. While the rest of the team was going up against HYDRA thugs who got their hands on Chituari weapons, she had to wait outside and guard the entrance. Steve ordered her to stay there to not let anyone escape and so far not one Nazi came running through that gate to meet her wrath. She was bored to no end while the other Avengers got to kick ass inside that warehouse. Look, she got that Steve wanted to look out for her but she wasn't some damsel in distress! She didn't need his fucking protection! She had been living this life far longer than he had!

Finally there was some movement! A car raced through the gate and she shot the tires to stop it while running towards it. Three men got out of the car taking something with them and tried to get away by foot. She followed them into another warehouse. One man tried to get a jump on her but she shot him as soon as she spotted him. _Two to go._

She checked the first floor of the building but the two other HYDRA thugs were nowhere to be seen. She carefully walked up an old staircase and shot the second one before he could use his alien weapon on her.

She had no idea why Steve wanted her to keep her out of danger, she was clearly crushing it!

She walked over the wooden floor to find the last guy when she heard a loud crack coming from the wood. Uh oh! She wanted to shoot her Widow lines into the ceiling to save her from falling but it was already too late. The floor broke and she crashed down.

She blinked her eyes open to a panicked Steve who removed wooden planks that had buried her under them. Her head and back hurt and she was pretty sure she had broken her left ankle.

"Did you get the guy?" She asked hoarsely.

Steve ignored her question. "What were you thinking going after them alone?" He growled out while checking her body for wounds.

Excuse me? Why was he snapping at her? She had been following his fucking orders? "You told me to watch the fucking gate, Captain!" She spit out. "Three hostiles were fleeing with alien tech so I went after them!"

"Why didn't you call for back up!" He asked. "I would have come! You know that!"

She pushed his hands away when he checked her leg for broken bones. "I don't need you to hold my hand, Rogers! I've been doing this job far longer than you! I know what I'm doing!"

His jaw was set. "Really? You just fell 30 feet down! You could have broken your spine or worse!"

She originally wanted to tell him that she probably had broken her ankle but there was no way she was going to admit that now! When he was being such an ass! She sat up against the debris and crossed her arms. "There are always risks in our line of work. Just because we're dating doesn't give you the right to put me on the fucking bench! I can't believe you're using your position as leader to order me to stay out of danger!"

"Nat..." Steve sighed and rested his hand on her hurt ankle. She did her best to hide her pain. "That's not what I'm doing... I just..."

She held her hand up. "Save it! I don't need you patronizing me! I know you're from a different area but I really thought you weren't a sexist!"

Steve gave her a perplexed look. "What?"

"You clearly think I can't hold my own because I'm a girl and now that I'm _your girl_ you think you're the boss of me?" She didn't realize that shetalked herself in rage."Are you expecting me to wait for you at the Tower with a home-cooked meal after you come back from a mission? Do your laundry and then spread my legs for you?" Okay, that last part might have been a bit too much.

Steve looked like someone slapped him. "What the fuck, Natasha?! Do you really think that about me? Do you really think that I don't see you as my equal?"

She was still pissed. "Well, I don't see you putting Clint on gate-watch and sitting in a nest and observing is pretty much his expertise! Or any of the other guys! And the only thing that seperates them from me is that I'm the only girl on the team and the one you're fucking!"

Steve looked now as furious as she felt. "Do you really think that low of me?"

She laughed dryly. "I think the question is if you think of _me and my skills_ that lowly? Newsflash: I don't need you to look out for me!" She clenched her jaw. "I don't need you, period!"

"Fine!" Steve snapped. "Then I guess you don't need my help getting out of here. Don't think I didn't notice that your ankle is broken! Have fun limping out of here!" He got up and walked away. He turned around when he got to the exit. "Ever thought it was never about you needing me but me needing you? You're right, you're different from the other team members. I need you to be safe not because we're _fucking._ " He said that word in disgust. " Everyone who was ever important to me is dead or gone and I don't want you to join that club! I need you to be safe because I love you!" He walked out of the gate and Bruce came shortly after in to check her ankle.

She was too shocked to say anything. This was the first time he said that he loved her and he practically spat it out to her.

* * *

Steve avoided her like she was the pest in the next day. He didn't speak to her during the flight back to Manhattan and then left the Tower to stay at his place in Brooklyn probably knowing that she couldn't go after him. She couldn't drive on her own, Happy was too afraid of her to drive her, and Tony and JARVIS didn't let her borrow one of the self-driving cars because of safety reasons because they were still in the test phase. Pah!

But even if she did find a way to get to Brooklyn, did she even want to see that stubborn ass? Just because he loved her didn't give him the right to treat her differently! No, she didn't want to see his face. She didn't need him. It was better that way. Steve's feelings for her got him clearly compromised. Maybe she should just call Coulson and ask him if he got a place for her at SHIELD. That way no stupid boyfriend would be there to boss her around and put her on the sidelines! A little voice in her head wondered though if Steve was even still her boyfriend.

They had a team night a week after the mission where she had broken her ankle and Steve didn't come. She hadn't tried to contact him and he didn't call her either so she had no idea where he was when the others asked her.

"Trouble in paradise?" Tony asked with a raised eyebrow.

"None of your fucking business!" She said and limped back to her floor. She couldn't wait for Dr. Cho to arrive to fix her ankle with her wonder machine.

Dr. Cho fixed her ankle two days later and she was technically capable of driving or taking the subway to Brooklyn but she was too stubborn and proud for it. Why should she give in? She was totally in the right!

She was on the common floor raiding the library for something to read when Tony walked in to ask her if she had heard from Steve.

"No. Why?" She asked with her back to him checking the shelves for a good book that she hadn't read yet.

"He and Wilson went after another Barnes lead and haven't checked in yet."

She turned around. "What?" She had no idea he was on a mission. "Is he okay?"

"I was hoping you could tell me." Tony gave her a small smile. "I'm sure they're fine. Maybe they found Barnes and hadn't had the opportunity yet to check in with us."

Tony left with that and she stayed behind with a bad feeling in her gut. Why couldn't she stop thinking that something had happened? God, what if their last interaction was that fight?

Another day passed and either Steve nor Sam contacted them. She visited Hill in her office and forced her to give her the info on their mission. Someone who looked like Barnes was spotted in South France. What the fuck was Barnes doing there? Looking for a vineyard?!

A day later a quinjet landed on the roof of the Tower and the medical staff rushed to get there. Natasha was confused and followed them. She could only think of two people who could have been on that quinjet and her gut twisted in knots thinking that something could have happened to Steve.

She ran to the roof and saw through the windows that Sam pushed a gurney down the ramp and of course Steve was on it. He was out and his face was covered in bruises, blood and dirt. Fuck! Bruce pushed her gently out of the way and greeted Sam.

"What happened?"

"We got into a trap. Cap got me out but went back into the building to secure HYDRA intel. Then there was an explosion." Sam paused to collect himself and then looked at her. "It took me two days to find him."

She bit her lip and willed herself not to cry. Bruce told the medical staff to bring Steve to the infirmary and to get the OR ready. She didn't know what to do and ran away.

"Wait!" Sam yelled after. "He needs you!"

 _Ever thought it was never about you needing me but me needing you?_ Steve's words echoed through her mind.

She couldn't handle any of this right now and took one of the cars and just kept driving. Her phone beeped with calls and messages but she ignored them. She didn't need the team to make her feel bad for bailing on Steve.

She didn't really know where she was when she couldn't stop herself anymore from thinking about Steve. Was he okay? Was he badly hurt? Shouldn't the serum have healed his wounds after two days? He must have been injured badly if the serum hadn't done its job yet. What if he would die? He couldn't just leave her behind!

How dare him for keeping her out of danger but throwing himself into any dangerous situation he could possibly find!

How dare him for making her love him!

Wait, what? She never used the l-word when she thought about her feelings for Steve before. Sure, she knew she liked him a lot and was into him but she didn't realize until now that those feelings were love. Did he worry like that about her as well on any mission? She didn't like to admit it but he could take more than her thanks to his serum. Her waterdowned version didn't make her strong enough to throw Harleys into tanks. It didn't excuse him putting her on the bench during missions but he did it because he didn't want anything happen to her.

What the fuck was she doing? She took an illegal u-turn and used the GPS of the car to get back to the Tower. JARVIS informed her when she entered the elevator that Steve was stabil and had woken up. God, how long had she been driving around? He had to think that she was done with him after seeing that she wasn't sitting by his bed waiting for him to wake up. Did her pride ruin things between them?

She ran to infirmary and stopped at the frame of the open door of Steve's room. Sam was there and talking to him. They both looked up. Sam seemed angry and Steve... She couldn't really read his expression.

Sam got up and walked past by her without saying a word. Well, she probably deserved that.

"I'm sorry." Steve said. "It wasn't okay for me to give you orders that kept you out of battles. I shouldn't have used my positon as leader for that. It's not that I don't think of you less. Hell, I know what a great fighter and agent you are. You never cease to amaze me with your skills in the field." He paused to take a deep breath. "It's just that everyone's gone. Peggy is dead and Bucky... Who knows if I ever find him. Just the thought of losing you... I can't bare that. I know you don't need me, Nat. I do. But I need you! I need you more than you can imagine. You're the only good thing in this crazy world!"

He looked like he expected her to bold out of the door and to never come back. And she was ashamed to admit that a very small part of her was tempted to do so. She walked over to the chair next to his bed and sat down. She hoped that she could form her thoughts into words. "I can understand why you did it. Doesn't mean it was okay." She added quickly. "I know you don't want me to get hurt because I don't want you to get hurt either but we both have a job to do." He nodded. "I'm sorry I snapped at you and I'm even more sorry I wasn't sitting by your side waiting for you to wake up. I was scared, I think. Scared that you won't make it." She sighed deeply. "Truth is I do need you. I need you to stay alive because you idiot made me fall in love with you."

Wow, Natasha that had to be the worst love confession in the history of love confessions.

Steve didn't seem to terribly mind though because his whole face lit up. "So, you're in love with me?"

She rolled her eyes. "I think I just said that."

"In that case I'm gonna let the part where you call me an idiot slide." He grinned and held his hand out. She took it and interwined their fingers. "I love you too, Natasha."

They were silent for some time and Steve played with her fingers. "The next mission we have, you're in charge." He eventually said and she looked surprised up. "And if you want me to stay here and wait with a home-cooked meal for you than that's what I'm gonna do."

She had to laugh. Things would be okay from now on. They would probably be pissed with each other from time to time because they were both reckless assholes but she was sure that they would make it work.

"You can't even really cook, Steve!"

"True. But I can order a mean pizza!"

* * *

 _Nat and Steve may seem a bit OOC but it was the only way I could make this one-shot work._


	9. You're all I need

_Peggy dies and Natasha tries to be there for Steve._

* * *

"I still think you're cheating, Maximoff!" Sam accused after he lost another round of ping pong despite claiming he was the master champigon of that game. Wanda smirked at him and bowed. Natasha who was sitting on the window seat laughed and continued to read her magazine.

Steve looked from her back to Sam who clearly wanted him to be on his side but he was referee and he didn't see Wanda cheating. "Sorry, but she won fair and square!"

Sam pouted and begrudgingly got his wallet out to give Wanda her fifty bucks. "Don't blow it all on candy, kid!"

Steve watched the scene in amusement and wanted to go over to join Natasha on her window seat. He had been trying for weeks now to find the courage to ask her out on a date. She was his best friend and he wasn't so sure if she felt more than friendship for him and he didn't want to make things weird between them but he just had to know if she wanted to date him. He was now in love with her for years and he needed to know if there was hope. He gave Sam a look and he left with Wanda the room. The kid probably knew with her powers what he was about to do since she gave him a knowing smile. He walked over to Nat when his phone beeped with a message. He was tempted to ignore it but in their line of duty they couldn't ignore their phones.

He opened the text message and his heart stopped. _She's gone. In her sleep._

He knew immediately who _she_ was. _Peggy._ Peggy was dead. She was gone, the only person left from his original time was gone.

"Steve?" He looked at Natasha. "Everything okay?"

He shook his head and ran out of the room. He didn't know where he was going until he stopped on the staircase. Peggy was dead. It didn't matter that she had lived a long life, it wasn't fair that he only had a few visits with her after he got out of the ice. There was still so much that he didn't know about her and now he would never hear her tell him those things.

A small hand was suddenly on his shoulder and he turned around. Natasha was three steps above him and now taller than him. "Steve, what's wrong?" She asked softly.

"She's gone." He sighed out and he saw on her face that she knew who he was talking about.

"Oh, Steve. I am so sorry!" She pulled him into a hug and he rested his head under her chin. She stroked his back and he enjoyed being in her arms. He didn't know how long they stood like this in the staircase and if Natasha got tired she didn't say so and held him and let him cry quietly on her chest. He didn't notice how hard he clutched her until she made noises of discomfort. He needed her so much in that moment. His old world was completely gone with Peggy's death and Nat had always been the only thing that made sense in this new world.

"Sorry." He released his hold of her but she still had her hands on his arms.

"It's okay." She gave him a soft smile and despite everything his heart fluttered at the sight proving how strong his feelings were for her. "Do you need anything, Steve?"

He wanted to hold her more, he wanted to kiss her and tell her he loved her before she would be gone as well. "No." He said instead. "I just want to be alone."

She nodded and rubbed his arms. "Okay. But now that you are not alone, Steve. We are all here for you. I'm here for you." She gave him one last nod and walked away.

* * *

Steve stayed the rest of the day at his quarters and didn't join them for dinner. Natasha told the rest of the team about Peggy's death and they all wanted to help him. But how could you help someone who lost the last connection to their old life and more importantly the woman they loved without ever having the chance of a life together. Natasha knew what role Peggy had in Steve's life and she didn't think he would get over that loss.

Sam helped her put the dishes away after dinner. "You should go to him, Nat. He needs you."

She shook her hand and put the forks back into the drawer. "No, you're what he needs right now. You always know what to say to make people feel better."

Now Sam was shaking his head. "No, believe me. You're the only one who can comfort him right now. You're what he needs, Nat!"

He looked so convinced about it that she didn't want to disagree. She made a few sandwiches and took the plate with her to Steve's quarters. Natasha was a bit surprised that FRIDAY just let her in but that thought vanished when she found Steve in his bedroom. He was on his side laying on his bed and starring at the wall. She couldn't tell if he noticed her presence or not. She didn't really know what to do. She wasn't made to comfort others. It wasn't in her DNA but she wanted to take away his pain. She hated to see him like this. He was hurting and there was nothing she could do to ease his grief. She put the plate with the sandwiches on the dresser next to her and walked over to Steve.

What could she say to him? Was there even anything you could say to a guy who lost the love of his life? She hated herself for feeling jealous in that moment. This was not the time to think about her feelings for Steve. Steve's heart had already been taken and now it had died along with Peggy.

Out of instinct she got out of her shoes and climbed onto his bed and spooned him. Steve tensed for a second but then he grabbed her arm to hold her hand against his chest.

She knew it was wrong but she enjoyed holding Steve in her arms. She fell asleep and when she woke up it was dark outside. She checked Steve's clock on his nightstand and it was 3:21 am. They had been laying on this bed for over seven hours. She raised her head to check if Steve was sleeping. He was and she was tempted to go back to sleep but it wasn't right to hold the man she loved in her arms when he was mourning the loss of the woman he had loved. She entangled her arms from his and snucked quietly out of his room. She put the sandwiches in the fridge and left him a note telling him where he would find them. He could eat them as breakfast.

Her heart broke for Steve. She couldn't even imagine what he was going through. If Steve died... No, she couldn't think about something like that. Just the thought about losing him was too much.

* * *

Peggy would be buried in London and her family asked him to be one of the coffin bearers. Of course he said yes, he wanted to honour Peggy and her legacy. Steve had hoped that Natasha would come with him but Fury needed her for something and she left three days before he and Sam took a flight to London. Tony was already there and let them stay at his town house. He always forgot that Tony knew Peggy too and that she had watch him grow up.

Guests from all over the world had already arrived and Steve left Tony and Sam to meet the other coffin bearers. Nephews and great-cousins of Peggy.

It hit him again that Peggy was truly gone. That she would never call him dramatic again and or ask him if he finally asked Natasha out on a date. He terribly missed her and the only solace that he could find was that Peggy was reunited with her husband. He had always seen in her eyes how much she had missed him when she had talked about Daniel. At least they were together again.

After they set Peggy's coffin on the altar he turned around to go to his seat in the first row. Sam and Tony were there and Tony was fighting with his tears. Tony had told him this morning that Peggy had talked some sense into Howard from time to time to be a better father to him. Steve still had a hard time wrapping his head around the fact that Howard had been a bad father. Tony's Howard sounded so different from the Howard he knew.

He didn't recognize her at first with her black hat that covered most of her hair but next to Tony sitting was Natasha. She gave him a small smile and he sat down next to her. He was suprised to see her here and so thankful that she knew that he needed her and that she managed to finish whatever Fury wanted from her.

He took her hand and laced their fingers together. If she was surprised by it she didn't show it and put their interwined hands on her lap.

He kept looking at their hands in her lap when Sam nudged him. He looked at him and he pointed to the altar. What was Kate, no Sharon doing here?

Sharon began her speech and looked at him when she revealed what connection she had to Peggy. They were family! Sharon was Peggy's niece! And despite that knowledge she flirted with him when she had been his neighbour? Was her connection to Peggy the reason why Fury ordered her to watch him? Had he been hoping that Steve would fall for Peggy's niece? He might have had a little crush on Kate back then but now that only freaked him out. In another universe he could have been her uncle!

Did Nat know about this? And still told him to ask Sharon out?

He looked from Sharon to Nat who didn't show any reaction. Did she or did she not know?

The service was beautiful and a great tribute to the amazing and wonderful woman Peggy was.

Steve stayed on the church bench after the service and Nat was still there holding his hand. "Steve?"

"Did you know?" He turned to look at her. "That she was her niece?"

"I never knew her last name." Natasha answered and he believed her. He didn't think she would lie about that to him.

"I'm glad you're here."

She squeezed his hand. "Me too. I didn't want you to be alone."

They both knew that he hadn't been alone because of Tony and Sam but it still meant the world to him that she was here to support him.

She let go of his hand and kissed his cheek. "I'll give you some privacy to say goodbye to her."

She left the church and he was alone with Peggy's coffin. He got up from the bench and walked over to her coffin to place his hand on the flag. Those would be his final words to her. He sighed and bid his farewell.

* * *

Natasha had been gone for three weeks now and Steve was worried sick. All he knew was that she went undercover for Fury and could be off the grid for some time. He knew that she was the best at what she was doing but he was still worried. He just lost Peggy, losing Natasha would be unbearable.

He couldn't sleep so he went to the common kitchen to make himself a hot milk with honey. Since Natasha left for her mission he had been having nightmares that something had happened to her. He hoped they were just nightmares and not some kind of vision. He would lose his mind if something happened to her.

He stopped dead in his tracks when he stepped into the kitchen. He thought he was hallucinating but she didn't disappear after he blinked his eyes a few times. Natasha was standing with her back to him and roaming the fridge.

"Nat?"

She turned around and smiled at him. "Hey soldier!"

His gut twisted in knots when he saw her face. She had a black eye and a cut on her right cheek. He curled his hand into a fist and tried to stay calm. Someone had hurt her! He had to find them and make them pay!

"Hey, it's okay." She said with a soothing voice. "You should see the other guy. Well, you would have to go to the morgue for that."

"Good!" No one deserved to get away with hurting her. He sometimes surprised himself with how protective he was of her.

She had found the leftovers from dinner and lifted the container up. "You want some?"

He shook his head and she dug her fork into the pasta.

"I can heat that up for you." He offered and walked around the kitchen counter to stand next to her.

"No, it's fine." She said between bites. "Thank you but I'm too hungry to wait to eat."

Nat never told him about the missions Fury sent her on and he didn't think it would change now.

She put the fork down after a few more bites and looked at him. "How are you, Steve?"

 _Good now that I can see with my own eyes that you're safe._ "Um, fine. You?"

She suddenly placed her hand over his and gave him a little smile. "If you wanna talk about Peggy, you can. You know that right?"

Oh, that was what she meant. "I do, thank you."

"I can't imagine how you feel. Losing the woman you love."

"I don't love Peggy." He paused, not that wasn't right. "I mean I do love her but not like that. We never had the time to fall in love with each other. I thought we would have the time for that after the war but then..." He looked at Natasha whose eyes were full of sympathy and he almost told her that she was the woman he loved. The woman he was in love with. That he had to sleep in the ice for seven decades so he could meet her. Just like Peggy had to stay in the SSR to meet her Daniel.

Nat gave his hand a light squeeze. "But she was still very important to you."

"Yes, she was."

She put the rest of the leftovers back into the fridge and wished him a good night. She was already by the door when he found the courage to ask her what had been on his mind for months, well actually years. He missed his chance with Peggy, he didn't want to miss his chance with Natasha.

"Nat?"

She turned around. "Yeah?"

"Do you want to go with me tomorrow to that little Italian restaurant in town?"

She furrowed her eyebrow in confusion. "Steve, that's a place where you go when you're on a date. Not when you're out with a friend."

Maybe he should have phrased that clearer. He took a deep breath. "Natasha, will you go on a date with me?"

Now she seemed even more confused. "What?"

"It's okay if you don't want to. If you don't see me that way..." He started to feel embarrassed. Of course, Natasha wasn't romantically interested in him.

"Steve, stop. I'd love to go on a date with you." She smiled. "Will you pick me up at seven?"

He couldn't believe what she just said. Did she actually agree to go on a date with him? "I'll be there on the dot."


	10. Do you have a girlfriend (AU)? Part 1

**Sportsfan64, I was working on your prompt but then this came out instead. I hope you like it anyway:)**

 _AU:Lila thinks that Auntie Nat needs a boyfriend and asks the handsome stranger at the supermarket if he has a girlfriend._

* * *

Natasha loved her goddaughter Lila very much. She was her little sunshine and the girl had her wrapped around her finger. So of course Natasha said yes when her best friend Clint asked her if she could look after Lila and spend the day with her.

Lila wanted to make cupcakes and since Natasha didn't have everything they needed at home, they went to the supermarket. But Lila took off when she had her back to the child for one minute and now Natasha was frantically searching for the little girl. Why did supermarkets have to be so fucking big?! What if someone took Lila or she walked out of the store and was now running around the streets?

Natasha had already checked the candy and toy sections but she didn't find the kid there. Oh God, where was she? She wanted to go to the register so they could help her find her when she suddenly saw a little girl in the vegetable isle. Not really Lila's favourite place in the supermarket but it was definitely her. Then she saw that Lila wasn't alone, a blond man was kneeling down and talking to her. He looked really good from what she could see but creeps could come in all shapes and sizes. She walked faster to get to her goddaughter.

"That sounds really great Lila but shouldn't we look for your aunt? I'm sure she's worried!" The man's voice was deep and smooth.

But wow, Lila clearly hadn't been listening when her mother told her about stranger danger.

"Lila! There you are!" Natasha was relieved that she was okay and seemed to be safe.

Lila turned around and smiled. "Hi Auntie Nat! This is Steve!" She said and pointed behind her. "He likes dogs more than cats and he's single!"

She had said the last part like a mother who was desperately looking for a man for her daughter and not like a seven year old girl. Okay, she knew she had been single for a while but it still wasn't that long that her freaking goddaughter had to try to set her up. Was that the reason Lila disappeared? Had she been running around the store looking for men? God, how embarrassing!

Steve stood up and blushed slightly. Okay, he looked really cute and woah he was tall and muscular! "Um, hi. Your niece came to talk to me. But I told her that we should look for you!"

Yeah she heard that part and Steve didn't seem like a creep and she decided that he wasn't dangerous for Lila.

Lila beamed at Steve. "Isn't she super pretty? And she's a ballerina!"

Steve blushed even harder. "Yeah, she is."

Since it wasn't a Nancy Meyer movie she took Lila's hand and told her to say bye to her new friend. Lila looked disappointed but did what she was told.

Steve gave them a warm smile. "Bye Lila. Bye Natasha."

She ignored how nice her name sounded on his lips and nodded at him before she walked back to the isle where she lost Lila.

* * *

Steve was with his best friend Bucky at Starbucks when he saw the beautiful red head from the supermarket again. He had been amused when the little girl tipped on his waist and asked him if he was single and that her aunt Natasha was very pretty and if he wanted to go on a date with her. He mostly wanted to reunite the girl with her aunt but he would be lying if he said that he hadn't been smitten with the woman when he saw her.

Natasha was walking by the window and he prayed that she would walk into the Starbucks and his prayers got answered. She came through the door and walked straight to the counter to order.

"You seeing anything interesting?" Bucky asked and turned around to look into the direction he was staring. "Oh wow! She's gorgoeus!"

"Remember the girl I told you about from the supermarket?"

Bucky turned back to face him. "You mean when a little girl asked you on a date?" He grinned.

Steve rolled his eyes. "No! She asked me to ask her aunt on a date! That's her!"

Bucky's eyes widened. "And you didn't? Hell, I wouldn't blame you if you proposed right on the spot!"

"She looked really embarrassed by the whole thing. I didn't want to make her more uncomfortable." That and he wasn't the best with women. His last relationship was years ago and he didn't have the courage like Bucky to go to women and flirt with them. And most women who flirted with him knew who he was and were just interested in his fame and money. Steve was a successful artist whose pieces sold for a lot of money and he had connections to a lot of important people. He wasn't an idiot, he knew that those women found that more interesting than him.

"Well, then try your luck this time!" Bucky encouraged him. "How likely is it to run into the same person again? Especially in New York?"

Bucky had a point but even if he did find the courage to walk over to her what was he supposed to say? He was horrible at this and she probably didn't even remember him. A woman like that must meet men all the time.

He looked back from Bucky to Natasha. Her order had been called out and she turned around with a cup and a bag in her hands. Her eyes scanned the room briefly and they stopped at him. Did she remember him? Should he smile or wave? Quick Steve, do something!

Natasha's gaze lingered on him for a few seconds but she made no sign that she knew who he was and walked out of the coffee shop.

"Great, Stevie. "Bucky said dryly. "There goes your chance at true love."

"Shut up and eat your muffin!"

* * *

Her friend Pepper invited her to a gallery opening of a very talented artist according to Pepper. Natasha wasn't really into the art scene and the weird people that came along with it but she hadn't been out for some time and Pepper said there would be an open bar. Who was she to say no to free booze?

She didn't really know what people wore to art galleries and she decided to wear a simple black dress that clung nicely to her body. Who knew maybe she would meet someone and Lila could stop bugging her about men. Natasha started to think that Clint was behind the whole thing because really what seven year old thinks their aunt needs to date?

Pepper picked her up with her fancy car and thanked her for coming with her since her husband Tony was out of town. "I want to buy a few pieces and I need a second opinion."

Natasha laughed. "And you pick me for that? You know I have no clue about art! I can spot a Monet but that's it!"

"But you have good taste, Nat! I think you'll really like Steve Rogers' pieces. He does paintings and sketches. He's a good friend of Tony. Have you two ever met?"

Steve Rogers? That name didn't ring any bell. "Nope, I don't think so."

Pepper nodded. "Well, remind me to introduce you two. He's been travelling the world for a year and now back in town. I'm sure you get a long."

"Didn't you say he was a friend of Tony?" She liked Pepper's husband just fine and he made Pepper happy and that was what was important but Tony sometimes infuriated Natasha to end.

Pepper laughed at that. "He's not like Tony, don't worry." Pepper parked the car and gave the valet her keys. Woah, a lot of people were here! Pepper gave her a funny look. "You're currently single, right?"

Oh no, please not Pepper too! "Why?"

"Steve is a great guy, maybe you two hit it off." And with that Pepper linked their arms together and walked with her into the gallery.

This was the second Steve someone tried to set her up with. Oh God, how many Steves were there in New York her loved ones could find?

Pepper met two friends to talk about another artist Natasha had never heard about and she started to feel dumb. She didn't know any living artists besides Banksy. So she left Pepper with her friends to talk about art and went to the bar to order a martini. She had a feeling she would be talking to the bartender quite a lot today.

"Hi." Someone besides the bartender was talking to her. She turned and a good looking man was standing next to her and smiling at her like he knew her. But she definitely didn't know him. She didn't think she would forget such a handsome face. "You don't look like you're into art that much."

"That obvious?" She laughed. "I'm the plus one of an artsy friend. What about you?"

"It's my best friend's work so I'm here as moral support." He offered her his hand. "James Barnes."

She shook his hand. "Natasha Romanoff."

Barnes smiled again at her like he knew something she didn't. Or was that his way of flirting? "Have you met my friend yet?"

"Steve Rogers? No, but apparently we have mutual friends."

"Really?" Barnes seemed amused by that. "What a small world! Well, it was nice meeting you, Natasha. I'm sure you'll run into the star of the evening."

She raised her drink at him and then finished it. She should probably look for Pepper. She couldn't spend the whole night at the bar, she didn't want to be rude. She spotted Pepper with a small group of people who seemed pretty taken by a tall and blond man. Was that the artist?

Pepper saw her and waved at her. The man turned around and... Fuck! That was supermarket Steve! What was he doing here? Wait, was supermarket Steve Steve Rogers? Crap, she hoped she would never run into him again after Lila hit on him for her. He probably thought it was super weird that a child walked over to him and asked him if he wanted to date their aunt.

And by the look on supermarket Steve Rogers' face he remembered her. Oh great! And they both knew Pepper and Tony! God, Tony would never let her live down the fact that Lila tried to set them up.

Pepper waved again and Natasha gritted her teeth but walked over to them. Better get this over with quick so she could go back to the bar. The others excused themselves and only Pepper and Steve were left.

"There you are!" Pepper said and looked way too excited. "Steve, this is-"

"Hi Natasha." Steve gave her a kind smile and she felt a little less embarrassed.

"Hi."

Pepper raised an eyebrow. "Wait, you two know each other?"

Natasha grimaced slightly but Steve didn't seem bothered. "Not really. We have a common friend, don't we?" He smiled again and he really had a great one.

Pepper was still confused. "Did Tony introduce you?"

Steve shook his head. "No, Lila did."

That supermarket thing happened two weeks ago and he remembered both their names? Pepper now seemed even more confused. "Barton's daughter? I didn't know you knew Barton, Steve."

"I don't."

Natasha almost laughed at how confused Pepper was. She clearly tried to make sense of this situation but didn't seem to succeed. Well, how could she. "Okay, I have no idea what's going on but I'm seeing the major over there and I have to talk to him about something." And with that Pepper was gone and she was left alone with supermarket Steve who was also an artist and so famous that the freaking major was here.

"How's Lila?" Steve asked and he seemed geniunely interested and she really shouldn't find that hot. A guy like him had probably a model in every city waiting for him. Was he really single or did he just say that to Lila because he thought that was what she wanted to hear?

"She's good. She actually looks for you when she's with her mom at the grocery store." Fuck, why did she tell him that?

Steve smiled again. "Well, it is the closest one to my place, so I'm sure I'll meet her again."

She was glad that Steve didn't seem freaked out by that. "So, this is your work?" She asked lamely.

"Ha, yeah." He laughed out and then he blushed. "Do you like it?"

"They're great but I should tell you that I have no clue when it comes to art." She admitted. "And I checked the price tags. I can't really afford anything here but I guess it means your work is good."

Oh Lord, did she just offend him? But Steve laughed." Believe me I'm surprised people want to spend that much money. But if it's any consolation, half of it goes to charity."

Oh boy, now that was something that she found really attractive! Did the guy have any flaws?! Steve suddenly groanded while looking at something behind her. She turned around and caught the guy from the bar earlier giving Steve a thumbs up. Okay what was that about?

She looked at Steve who scratched his neck. "Um, I maybe told my friend about the supermarket thing and he called me an idiot for not asking you out. And then I saw you last week again but I was too chicken to speak to you."

He was now fully blushing and she couldn't help but find it adorable. "And what about now? Are you gonna ask me now?"

"Depends on your answer." He gave her a boyish grin.

She smirked back. "Well, you never know that answer if you won't ask."

"Do you wanna go out with me?" He looked around and he suddenly seemed like he didn't like this party at all. "Maybe now?"

She was surprised that he wanted to go on date immediately but what the hell. They were both dressed for the occasion and she was sure Pepper wouldn't be mad at her for leaving the gallery with the guy she would have definitely tried to set her up with. "Yes. I just have to Pepper that I'm leaving."

Steve beamed at her and her chest fluttered lightly. She had to give it to Lila she really knew how to pick'em.


	11. Do you have a girlfriend? (AU) Part 2

_Here's a short sequel to "Do you have a girlfriend?" since you guys seemed to enjoy it and I had fun writing it._

* * *

She got to talk to Pepper right after she was done talking to the mayor. "Do you mind if I took off?"

"You wanna already leave? Let me say good bye to Steve and then we can go." Pepper naturally offered. She was such a good friend because Natasha could see that Pepper wanted to stay longer.

"You can stay, Pep! You don't have to come with me."

Pepper crossed her arms. "Of course I'm coming with you. I'm your ride and I don't want you to waste money on a cab!"

Natasha had to smile. Pepper knew that she was saving every penny for her dancing school and didn't want her to spend money. She searched briefly for her date and he was talking to his friend who looked very pleased. He was probably congratulating Steve that he asked her out.

"That's sweet but I kinda have a date." She admitted and Pepper now had a similiar look on her face like Steve's buddy.

"You kinda have a date?" She smirked. "With whom?"

Natasha rolled her eyes. "With the artist himself if you must know."

"So you're getting a private display?"

"We'll see." She laughed and gave Pepper a kiss on the cheek.

Steve was already waiting for her at the front door and smiled brightly at her when she came to him. "So what do you wanna do?"

"I don't really know my way around Manhattan. I'm a Brooklyn guy through and through."

She didn't think that any restaurants had open tables on a saturday night and she decided to do something she never did with stranger before. "If you want, we can go to my place. Cook something." She rather go to her place than his, it made her feel safer.

"I'd love too." He smiled and hailed a cab that brought them back to Brooklyn. They walked to the supermarket they met in two weeks ago and Natasha almost suspected Lila to be there but it was already to later for her to be outside. They got everything for pasta alfredo with chicken and Steve insisted to pay.

She suddenly feared that a rich guy like Steve would find her small apartment shabby or something. Not that she was ashamed of it, she loved her two bedroom place but Steve probably had a penthouse or something.

"It's not the Ritz." She warned him before she unlocked the door and they stepped inside.

Steve looked around. "You have a beautiful home, Natasha."

She believed him. She didn't really know him but something told her that he was always honest. "Thank you."

He walked over to the wall where her couch was and where she had framed pictures of her performances when she was a dancer. "Wow, so you're really a ballerina?"

She laughed. "You thought Lila was just trying to sell me to you? I was one. I retired last year and I'm opening my own dance school next month."

"That's really impressive!" He kept looking at her photos. "Where is your school gonna be?"

"Two blocks from here. You knew Jerry's gym?" Steve nodded. "He retired and sold it to me."

She walked over to take the shopping bag with the groceries out of his hands. He was looking at the photo of her and Lila where she gave her ballet lessons. "So does your niece ask a lot of men for you out?"

She knew that her cheeks were turning pink. "God, I hope not. I think you were the first."

Steve gave her a warm smile. "Well, I'm glad she came up to me."

And just like that she felt less embarrassed and silently thanked Lila. The girl had a good taste in men, it seemed.

Steve followed her into her kitchenette and they started to cook. They both kinda looked ridiculous her in her dress and he his suit in her small kitchen but Steve didn't seem to mind and let her put an apron on him. And maybe her hands lingered longer than necessary when she tied the knot of the apron. They talked about everything and anything while they made pasta alfredo. He was an only child and lost his parents like her. He joined the army after high school with his friend Bucky and got out after two tours and went to art school. He seemed impressed that she was originally from Russia and came alone to America.

"Wow, someone should make a movie about your story, Natasha!"

"Ha, please don't. Lila thought for some time that I was related to Anastasia after she saw the movie." She laughed and opened the wine bottle.

He took the wine glass she handed him and she swore she felt a spark when their fingers touched and she didn't seem to be the only one affected, judging the way Steve's breath hitched.

He helped her set the coffee table (her apartment was too small for a dinning table) and they sat down on her couch. She took the first bite and they had made a really good dish together.

"Mhm, it's good." Steve moaned between bites and that moan affected her more than it should. Look, she was already attracted to him, he didn't need to make sounds that reminded her of something completely different than food. God, had it really been that long since she got laid?

"Yes, it is." She agreed and did a little moan of her own to see his reaction. He gulped lightly and she was pleased that she wasn't the only one not thinking entirely about food.

"Pepper said you travelled the world?"

"Yeah, I did. I just needed to get out and clear my mind. I got a lot of inspiration for my work."

He told her a funny story that happened to him in Japan and she realized that she was really into him. He was kind, charming, funny and seemed to be really interested in the things she said. Well, and he was fucking handsome like some Greek god. He was almost too good to be true. He had to have a flaw.

"Do you have a wife, three kids and a golden retriever in Idaho?" She suddenly blurted out. How could a guy like that be single?

"What?" He choked on his wine and she automatically patted his back. "No! I don't! What makes you think that?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "I just don't get how a guy as great as you is single. Are you a serial killer?" Well, he probably wouldn't answer that if he was.

Steve now seemed amused. "No, I'm not. And what about you? How is a woman as beautiful and charming as you single? Do you have a wife, three kids and a golden retriever in Idaho?"

She laughed. "No, I don't. I don't know. I guess the guys I dated weren't that into me."

"Then they're idiots!" Steve said and suddenly the atmosphere changed. Really, the apartment could catch fire in that moment, she wouldn't notice.

"They are?" She asked quietly.

Steve nodded and didn't break eye contact. She leaned foward until his face was only a few inches away. "What about you? Why are you single?"

"Haven't found the right partner yet." He rasped out and his gaze fell to her lips.

She pressed her lips against his but he didn't kiss her. Oh God, had she read this completely wrong? "I'm sorry!"

She wanted to pull away but Steve's hand suddenly cupped her cheek. "Don't be. My brain needed a moment to process it. I can't believe you want to kiss me!"

He seemed genuinely surprised. What kind of women had he dated in the past? She closed her eyes. "Kiss me, Rogers!"

He chuckled. "Yes, ma'am." And then they finally kissed proberly and she wasn't one who used clichés but it really felt like fireworks went off. She sucked his lower lip into her mouth and he pulled her closer to him and she ended up in his lap. One hand was on her back to press her against him and his other played with the hem of her dress. She grabbed the collar of his dress shirt and was insanely happy when he licked over the seam of her lips and he used her soft moan to slip his tongue into her mouth.

Steve was an amazing kisser, she wanted to kiss him all night.

His hand slid under her dress to caress her thigh and his calloused fingertips felt so good on her skin. She wanted him to touch more of her but Steve suddenly stopped and removed his hand from her thigh.

What, why?

"Sorry." He whispered against her lips. "I got carried away."

He took his hand and slid it back under her dress. "Keep going."

"Are you sure? We should probably stop. I don't want you to think you have to..." He blushed but kept his hand on her leg.

There was no doubt in her mind that the night would end in her bedroom if they kept making out. "Are you still going be here tomorrow morning?"

"Of course!" He almost seemed offended that she could think he would sneak out after they slept together.

"Good." She whispered and slanted her lips over his while starting to unbotton his shirt.

He softly grabbed her hands. "I don't want this to be an one time thing."

She smiled and pecked his lips. "Me neither."


	12. Do you have a girlfriend? (AU) Part 3

_Third and final part of "Do you have a girlfriend?"_

* * *

Natasha already suspected that supermarket Steve would be great in bed but woah he was an incredible lover. She hoped he had been impressed with her as well.

And just like he said he was still here when the sun on her face woke her up. She blinked her eyes open and checked if Steve was still asleep. He was and she wanted to use the chance to quickly brush her teeth and hair to make sure that she looked good. She was just about to entangle herself from him when he opened his beautiful blue eyes. She noticed the night before that they had fleeks of green in it.

"Hi." He mumbled in his deep voice. "You're so beautiful."

"I am?" She was sure that her hair had turned into a bird nest during the night and she probably had eyeliner smeared around her eyes.

He brushed his finger over her nose and lips and she tried to hide a shiver. "You are. I fee like I'm still dreaming." He gave her a dopey smile. "Am I still dreaming?"

She had to grin. He clearly was a charmer but she somehow knew that he meant every word. "No, you're not. Good morning, Steve."

He captured her lips in a sweet and long kiss. "Morning, Natasha." He kissed her again. "Can I take you out for breakfast? There's a great place a few blocks from here."

"You mean Julie's?" That little café was one of her favourites. He nodded and pecked her lips.

She got out of bed and looked over her shoulder to see Steve admiring her backside. He blushed when she caught him and she just laughed. It wasn't like he hadn't seen her naked the night before when he basically worshipped her body and she was glad that they both didn't want it to be an one time thing. Because Steve was definitely a keeper. He was smart, funny, talented and kind. And on top of that he was handsome, had the body of a god and was really good in bed. She could really see herself falling in love with him because she wanted to know everything about him.

"You wanna join me in the shower, handsome?"

He eagerly nodded and she couldn't help but feel flattered. It was nice that a man like him desired her and seemed to be not only interest in her body but also in everything else about her. He asked her if he could come to the opening of her dancing school and she knew that he would be there. Even if the opening was still a month away.

She changed into jeans and a sweater and Steve got back into his suit but stuffed his tie into his pocket. She checked her phone and Pepper sent her a text asking her how her date was with a winky face. She decided to text her later because wasn't she still on her date?

Steve looked at his phone and rolled his eyes before putting it back into his pocket.

"What's wrong?"

"Just my friend pretending to be worried because I didn't come home last night. I'm staying at his place until I found an apartment here."

They decided to walk to Julie's and Steve took her hand and she let him. It felt new but also so familiar like she had held his hand before. She wasn't really one to hold hands besides Lila's but holding Steve's hand felt really good. She could get used to this.

He held the door open for her and pulled her chair out. "You trying to seduce me with your good manners?"

Steve blushed lightly and she already knew that teasing him would be one of her new favourite things. "Aren't we past that?" His blush was getting deeper but he also bit his lips, possibly remembering last night and this morning.

"My ma always told me to treat a lady right."

She gave him a smile. "She would be proud."

"Thanks."

The waiter came and they ordered from the menu. She was stealing bacon from Steve's plate when someone called her name.

And then again. This time it was a child. "Auntie Nat?"

Her eyes widened and she turned around. Clint and Lila were standing in the entrace of the café waiting to be seated. Lila let go of Clint's hand and ran to her.

"Hi Auntie Nat!" The child smiled and wrapped her small arms around her. Lila didn't seem to notice yet that Natasha had company.

"Hi Lila" Steve said and smiled kindly. "Do you remember me?"

The kid's whole face lit up. "Steve! Did you get a dog yet?" She looked around. "Is the dog here? Is it a puppy?"

Steve laughed. "I haven't had the time yet."

Clint was suddenly standing next to Lila and extended his hand to Steve. "Clint Barton. Lila's dad and Nat's best friend. Lila talks a lot about you."

"Steve Rogers. Nice to meet you."

Natasha wondered if Clint was going to play big brother or not. He seemed to postpone that for another time when Lila asked them if they could sit with her and Steve. She loved the girl but she wanted to be with Steve alone. She was hoping he would spend the whole Saturday with her.

"Oh pumpkin." Clint laughed lighty. "They are on a date."

Lila wrinkled her cute nose. "I thought dates happen only in the evening? They do in the movies mommy watches."

Clint's eyes wandered over Steve's suit and he probably knew that it was the same outfit from yesterday. "I think this is part two of their date." He grinned smugly.

"There are parts of dates?" Lila seemed confused. "That sounds dumb."

Clint took his daughter's hand. "Look, a table is free. Say bye, kiddo."

Lila did as her father told her to but not without asking Steve if he would come as well when Natasha came over next time. Steve smiled and said immediately yes.

"You don't have to come, you know." She told him after Clint and Lila were gone. This thing between them wasn't even a day old. He probably didn't want to hang out with her family yet.

He reached his hand over the table to hold hers. "I want to."

She smiled and had a feeling this was the start of something beautiful.


	13. Bruce is back

**_For NacyBadVamp_**

 _Steve's in heaven until Bruce comes back._

* * *

Steve's life was perfect at the moment. He couldn't remember a time where he had been happier in his life than he was now. He could help and protect people as Captain America, Bucky was back and safe at the compound and the girl of his dreams was moving into his quarters. Really, this was the time of his life.

He sometimes still couldn't believe his luck that Natasha Romanoff was his girl. For the longest time he thought that he was the only with feelings but then one night while they had been on a mission in Canada she got into his bed saying that it was too cold and he should share his warmth with her. And then she was suddenly kissing him and his heart almost jumped out of his chest. He'd thought since Tony's party that Natasha had feelings for Bruce and he had lost her to him but then Bruce took off after Sokovia and Natasha and he got back into their routine they've had in DC. And then that night she kissed him and told him that she couldn't fight her feelings for him anymore. That happened six months ago and now he was helping her carrying her stuff into his quarters at the base.

He watched Natasha put her make up in the vanity they bought for the bedroom and couldn't stop smiling. He never dared to dream that he would ever get to have this with her. Watching make up free Natasha in his sweater and some yoga pants walking around a place that belonged to both of them. She smiled back at him when she saw him in the mirror of the vanity.

"What's gotten you in such a good mood?"

He walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her. "Just you."

She rolled her eyes playfully and turned in his arms to kiss him. He loved kissing her. "I think we should inaugurate the bed." She whispered against his lips.

"That bed isn't new." They did buy new furniture but the bed was still the old one that came with the quarters. He checked his watch. "And it's only 7 pm. Do you really wanna go to sleep already?"

"You're so cute sometimes." She kissed him again and slipped her tongue into his mouth. "We should celebrate this step in our relationship." She said after a wink and her hands moved to his belt.

 _Oh._ That was what she meant with inaugurating the bed.

* * *

He was still on cloud nine the next day when they met the others for breakfast in the common kitchen. Bucky and Sam were as always bitching at each other but Nat assured him that they secretly liked each other and would probably be pissed if someone else would talk like that about the other one.

"So how was the first night at your place?" Bucky asked and wiggled his eyebrows. He had to be the only person besides Clint who wasn't afraid of Natasha. Not that Steve was afraid of her but he knew better than to make her mad. One day he forgot her favourite ice cream after a trip to the supermarket and she wouldn't let him into her quarters (or pants) for two days.

Natasha smirked and threw her butter knife at Bucky that he caught between his hands and used it to spread butter on his toast.

"Captain Rogers?" FRIDAY interrupted before Nat and Bucky would get into an actual fight.

"Yes?"

"A quinjet is nearing the facility. It appears to be one of our own."

That couldn't be right. Every quinjet they had was in the hangar. The whole team was here. And even if Tony dropped by he preferred to take a private jet since his semi retirement. So who could it be?

He saw out of the corner of his eyes that Natasha was getting pale. Where they about to get attacked? He wanted to send Rhodey up in the air to potentially shoot the jet out of the sky when Natasha spoke up.

"It's Bruce." She whispered and he couldn't tell what was going on in her beautiful head.

* * *

Natasha was right. It was Bruce and the quinjet the Hulk took one and a half years ago to disappear. Steve wasn't sure what to do. He was glad that Bruce was okay and back but he didn't know what it would mean for Natasha because she hadn't looked or talked to him since the quinjet entered the air space around the base.

Bruce awkwardly walked down the ramp of the quinjet to the field where the team was waiting for him. Tony had been informed and he was on his way to the base. Bruce looked around until his eyes landed on Natasha and he clearly looked happy to see her. It was like the others didn't even exist in that moment. Suddenly fear was running through Steve's veins. Would Natasha leave him to be with Bruce? Did he have to step aside so Banner could take his place by Natasha's side?

"Hi guys!" Bruce greeted but only looked at Natasha who looked to the ground.

"Good to see you." Steve felt the need to say. He was the leader and no matter how confused he was with Bruce's arrival, he had to welcome Banner.

"Thanks, Rogers." Bruce smiled shortly at him and then looked at her again. "Nat?"

She eventually looked up. "Hi Bruce."

Bruce looked at the group. "Don't get me wrong, I'm glad to see you all but could I maybe talk to Natasha? Alone?"

Sam looked immediately at Steve who forced himself to smile. "Of course. We'll just go back inside." He didn't want to leave Nat alone with him. He had to know what they would talk about. What they would do. Would they get back together?

They walked back inside and sat down on the couches in the common room. Everyone looked at him, even Vision looked at him with sympathy in his eyes. Great, he didn't need their pity. They tried to involve him in a conversation to obviously distract him but he couldn't pay attention to it. He kept looking outside the window to see when Nat and Bruce would come in but they didn't show up. He scanned the field with his eyes but he couldn't see them anywhere. Where were they? What were they doing?

"I'm in the gym." He announced and got up from the couch. He needed to punch something.

"Steve!" Sam yelled after him but he ignored him. He wanted to be alone. Would he be single by the end of the day? Would Nat move back into her quarters or even worse move in immediately with Banner?

He didn't even bother to wrap his hands and started to beat up the punching bag. Stark had developed bags Steve couldn't send flying through the gym. Where was Natasha? Was she with Bruce? Would she leave him for Bruce? Did she even love Steve? He had told her two times already that he loved her in the last six months and Natasha only smiled and kissed him each time. He always thought that she didn't say it back because it wasn't easy for her to say these three words but what if she didn't say it because she didn't love him? What if she only loved Bruce and Steve was only the rebound?

He gave the punching bag a hit with everything he got and it flew across the room. Tony clearly needed to work on that.

Of course Natasha would go back to Bruce. They never talked about Bruce and he assumed that she had been over him but he started to think that she would drop him like a hot potato to be with Banner. Banner had seven Phds and was one of the brightest minds in the world and Steve...well, he couldn't compete with that. He was just a kid from Brooklyn.

He sweat through his clothes and needed a shower. He didn't want to use the one in his quarters. He didn't want to run into Nat who could already be clearing out her stuff because she was leaving him.

He walked to the showers in the locker room and punched a locker out of anger and jealousy. His hand was throbbing but he ignored the pain. God, he wished Banner had never come back. And what had he been thinking when he told Banner to pursue Natasha at that party before Ultron attacked? He didn't want Banner to go after Natasha romantically but Steve had already been in love with her and he had seen how she flirted with Banner and he only wanted Nat to be happy. Which meant that he would have to grit his teeth and watch the girl of his dreams be with someone else. He should call Fury and ask him if he had a long term mission in the Himalayas for him or something.

He stepped under the shower and let the hot water run over his body. Would Natasha and Bruce get married one day? Did they expect him to come to the wedding? He faced the wall washing his hair and was about to turn around so the hot water could run down his tense neck and back.

He turned around and Natasha was suddenly standing before him. Completely clothed. How did he not notice her getting into the shower?

"Did you hit a locker?" She crossed her arms over her chest and stepped under the water stream with him.

"Yes." He grunted and wanted to turn his back to her. He didn't want her to break up with him in a fucking shower. And he felt vulnerable with him being naked and her fully clothed.

"Steve? What's wrong?" She raised her hand to touch him and he took a step back. Natasha winched and he felt immediately bad.

"Where's Bruce?" He asked with a clenched jaw.

"Talking to the others. Getting to know James." She looked at him carefully. She was trying to read him. "Steve? Are you...are you jealous?"

He hated it that she could see right through him. "Are you getting back with him?" He whispered defeated. He didn't want to hear it but he knew he had to.

"What?" Her eyebrows almost reached her hairline. He felt a little bit of hope. "No! What makes you even think that?"

"You two were together before he left and I-" She placed a finger on his lips to silence him.

"First of all, Bruce and I were never together. There was weird flirting and an awkward kiss." He grimaced at that and she cupped his face. "An awkward kiss that I mostly used to push Bruce off a cliff so he would turn into the Hulk. Not my proudest moment."

Her hands left his face and he missed her touch. She pulled her wet shirt over her head and got out of her jeans. He almost forgot that she wearing clothes in this shower.

She was now only in her underwear when she cupped his face again and brushed her thumbs over his cheeks. "Let me make one thing very clear. Bruce and I were never together and we'll never be." She looked to the tiles on the floor and seemed guilty. "Bruce was just an escape. I knew it would never work and I used him to stop myself from getting what I really wanted. Who I really wanted." She gave him a short kiss and he felt hopeful again. "It's always been you, Steve. I was scared of my feelings and their depth and tried to run away from them. And you."

"Then why did you flirt with Banner that evening? And what about that lullaby?" He had hated it that she used that technique to calm the Hulk down. It looked so intimate.

She sighed. "I tried to distract myself from you. I didn't want to give into you. I thought going after Bruce would be easier. We're both monsters. We're-"

"You're not a monster!" He objected. She could never be a monster.

She chuckled grimly. "Tell that the people I killed."

"Nat-"

"And about the lullaby. I only learned it to control the Hulk. I never wanted to be so scared again like I was on the Helicarrier when the Hulk went after me." She admitted.

He tilted her chin up so she would look at him. "Hey. You don't have to be ashamed."

"I'm a horrible person. I only used Bruce. That's what we were talking about. I was apologizing and telling him about us."

"You told him about us?"

She looked confused. "Of course!" She reached behind her back to unclasp her bra and it fell to the floor. She was smirking at him when his gaze met her eyes again. "I don't know what made you punch a locker and destroy that punching bag but there is nothing to be worried about. I'm not leaving you for Bruce." She shimmied out of her underwear. "I'm not going to leave you!"

"Yeah?" He wrapped his arms around her and all that tension, confusion and rage was gone. He could breathe again.

"Yeah." She gave him a sweet kiss and his knees got weak. "Steve..." She took a deep breath. "I love you. Only you." She said quietly.

He was probably grinning like an idot. She finally said it! "I love you, too."


	14. Into the woods (AU)

For Rembrandtdt. I was working on your prompt and then I got kinda carried away. I hope you still like it. It still has Steve with his Infinity War look. I just added a flannel shirt.

 _AU: Natasha rents a cabin in Upstate New York to work on her second novel when she notices her handsome neighbour._

* * *

Natasha drove the short driveway up to the little cabin she rented to hopefully find the peace and inspiration to write her second novel. When your first novel about a Russian spy/ballerina was a surprising New York Times bestseller and Netflix wanted the rights for a mini series the pressure for your second book was enormous. So her publisher Fury told her to take some time off, stay away from Manhattan and take her laptop to this little town that no one ever heard about. Really that town only had three hundred people living in it and a tiny supermarket and a diner, nothing more. Which meant that Natasha had to eat everyday at that dinner or she had to try to cook herself which could end in her burning down the cabin. One of the things she loved so much about New York City was that she could always order food or go out. Fury should have told her that she would have to provide for her own.

She got her two suitcases out of the trunk of her car and walked to the cabin. It wasn't big but it had two rooms and a whirlpool on the porch. Apparently this area was very popular with hipsters. God, she hoped she wouldn't run into one. The woman who gave her the keys to her new home said that a nice and young man lived down the road and would definitely not mind helping such a pretty girl. Natasha was not interested in nice and young men at the moment and too stubborn in general to ask anyone for help. She dropped her suitcases on the bed and got back outside to get the rest of her stuff and the groceries out of the car. She was smart enough to buy a few frozen pizzas and threw one in the oven and put her stuff away.

She found a folding table after her lunch and dragged it along with a chair on the porch to use the good weather to write outside. She put her laptop and a coke on the table and waited for inspiration to strike. Writing had been so much easier when no one expected her to write a bestseller. Hell, when she worked on her first novel she never thought it would get published!

She had a wonderful view from the porch into the forest. God, were there bears and wolves in those woods? Did Upstate New York have wild animals? She should have looked into that before she booked this cabin and now she was too afraid to google it. Maybe she should write a book about a young woman who got mauled by a bear.

* * *

She managed to write down some notes for a few ideas that could be turned into a story but she mostly spent hours looking at an empty word document so she decided to explore the area. Not that she was an outdoorsy person but she did feel like she should at least set a foot into the forest surrounding her from time to time. She put on a warm jacket and sneakers and chose a trail that led her to a beautiful lake and she was lucky no one was here. She sat down on a bench and got a sandwich out of her backpack and just enjoyed the view.

She was almost done with her lunch when she noticed that she was in fact not alone. A man was a a couple of feet away from her standing in front of an easel probably painting the lake. She didn't think a man with an easel meant any danger and she let her eyes gaze back to the lake. It really was wonderful out here and maybe she would turn into an outdoorsy person after all.

She looked at the man again and had to admit that he looked at least from afar quite handsome. His blond/brownish hair was a bit longer than she usually liked on guys and combed back and he had a beard and she personally thought that only a few men could sport one but this guy looked really good with one. He looked at her and waved when he saw that she was looking at him. She awkwardly waved back feeling like she just got caught, collected her stuff and left so the guy could paint his picture and she wouldn't embarrass herself even more.

She wondered on her way back to the cabin what colour his eyes were because she couldn't tell from where she had been sitting. She chided herself for thinking about a man. She wasn't here to get laid, she was here to write her fucking novel.

It was already early in the evening when she noticed that her fridge was empty and she realized that she had to drive into town to get something to eat. She thought about going to the diner but she wasn't in the mood to deal with the locals. There was this group of old grandpas who liked to flirt with any woman under sixty and she didn't have the nerve for that tonight. She would just jump into the supermarket grab some frozen dinner and a bottle of wine and then drive back to her little cottage to watch a movie.

She put more in her shopping cart than she originally planned but that way she had at least food for a couple more days. She only realized that she went a bit overboard when she tried to carry the shopping bags to her car. She had her arms full and the bags blocked her sight and she only noticed she was running into someone when she already smacked into the person.

"Oh God, I'm so sorry!" She yelled and kneeled down to get her stuff back into her bags.

"No, I'm sorry!" A very deep and rich voice replied. Natasha looked up and it was the dude from the lake who looked even better up close. He was tall, muscular and was basically doing that red flannel shirt a favour by wearing it. And she finally knew what eye colour he had. Blue.

He kneeled down as well and helped her get her groceries back into her bags. Oh God, this was so embarrassing and such a cliché!

"Thanks." He handed her a shopping bag.

"Do you need help with that, ma'am?" Oh boy, had anyone ever called her ma'am before?

She put her chin on top of her bags and hoped that way they would stay in her arms. "Nope, I got it. Thank you."

He gave her a kind smile. "Okay, I would have carried these for you. Have a nice evening."

She kind of wanted to talk to him more because he looked very handsome and she liked his voice a lot and he seemed like a nice guy so far but she wasn't here for romance or a hook up. She needed to work on her book and not be distraced by cute guys. She wished him a good night as well and walked to her car.

* * *

She decided to take another hike the next day and walked down the road to get to the rail she picked out. A house was next to the entrance of the hiking path and the guy from the lake was in the front yard chopping wood. He really gave a lumberjack vibe and she found it attractive which surprised her. The man looked up and smiled at her and she decided to walk to him to introduce herself.

"Hi!" She stopped a few feet away from him. "I'm Natasha."

He offered her his hand. "Steve Rogers, ma'am."

His skin was both calloused and soft and she wondered what he was doing for a living. It had to be something with his hands. "Nice to meet you, Steve. Sorry for running you over yesterday."

"That's fine." He chuckled and asked her if she wanted something to drink.

"No, thanks. I'm on my way to the waterfalls actually."

"Oh, they're really great. Have fun." He smiled at her again and she had to admit that he was beautiful when he smiled.

Steve was right, the waterfalls were breathtaking and she took a few pictures to send them to Fury so he would hopefully enjoy them and stop bugging her to send him pages of her new book.

She walked past by Steve's house on her way back but he wasn't outside and she didn't want to knock on his door or something. He might thought that would be weird since they didn't really know each other at all.

She hoped she would see him again, maybe a little romance would inspire her to write more.

* * *

Two days later when she was about to go to bed there was a knock on her door. Natasha froze on the spot. Who could that be? She didn't know anyone here and she highly doubted that one of her friends would drive up here from Manhattan for a spontaneous visit.

She tiptoed to the door and grabbed a pan on her way. She looked through the peephole and it was lumberjack Steve with a rifle on his shoulder. Oh God, was the handsome stranger here to kill her? She only had a frying pan and a few hours of self-defense classes before she got bored and quit. She wished in that moment she was more like the Russian spy she created for her first book. Black Widow would have knocked Steve to the ground before he knew what was happening.

"Natasha?" He didn't sound like he was here to kill her. But then again, how did someone sound who wants to kill you?

She didn't answer him because she didn't get why he was here at midnight with a gun.

"Are you there? Are you okay?" Okay, why would he ask her that?

She opened the door but let the chain on and poked her head through. "Hi?"

"Did you check the news?" He seemed relieved when she opened the door a bit.

"Um, no?" She had no idea what was going on.

"Someone broke out of the prison a few miles from here. He's armed and dangerous." He paused. "And a serial rapist. I was worried about you. Martha told me she rented you the cabin and that you're all alone here."

"Do you want to come in?" She asked because she didn't want to be alone now. She was kinda glad she didn't know until now that a criminal was roaming the woods because she would have probably lost her mind out of fear. She shouldn't have quit those self-defense classes. She should go back once she was back in Manhattan.

"Only if you're okay with it. I can stay here outside, you don't have to let me in."

His kindness touched her. He would stay here to look out for her and didn't expect her to let him in. She smiled at him and then closed the door to get the chain off. "Come in." She opened the door and stepped aside so he could come in. "And thank you, Steve."

He smiled at her. "You don't have to thank me."

She orignally wanted to go to bed but there was no way that she could sleep now. She offered Steve tea and got into the kitchen to make it. Was she an idiot for letting Steve into her place? There was still a chance that he was lying about the whole fugitive thing but she didn't think that was the case. She somehow knew that he was here because he was worried that something could happen to her.

Steve sat on the couch when she came back with the tea and she took a seat on the armchair opposite to him and without realizing it they talked the whole night. He told her that he was a carpenter and artist and moved here a few years ago after he left the army and didn't want to go back to Brooklyn because it reminded him too much of his best friend who died in Afghanistan. She told him that she lost her parents when she was a child and grew up in a Russian orphanage and moved to the States as soon as she turned 18. As it turned out he actually had read her book which kind of embarrassed her but he assured her that he liked it and hoped she would sign his copy. She didn't know how many hours they talked but she felt like she had known Steve her whole life. She always had the problem to open up to people but she didn't have that problem with Steve.

It was already morning when her stomach growled and she got into the kitchen to make breakfast for her and Steve. He came into the room when she was putting the fried eggs on plates.

He held his phone up so she could see the text. "They got the guy. Caught him in a town on the other side of the lake." He put his phone in his jeans. "I guess, I can go now."

"No!" She said that way too quickly and loud but Steve didn't seem to mind. "At least eat breakfast with me! As a thank you for staying with me!"

He smiled and took the plate she offered him. Just like the night before they had a pleasant conversation and she had to admit that Steve was the kinda guy she could see herself falling for. He was fucking hot with his beard and that whole lumberjack thing he had going on and his personality matched his good looks. Guys like him were pretty rare. She hoped that he had the same impression with her. She knew she was beautiful but maybe he didn't like her spirit or he was already in a relationship.

He even helped her do the dishes after breakfast!

She walked him to the door and thanked him again for looking out for her.

"No problem, Natasha! I really liked spending the night with you." He blushed when he realized what he said. "Um, I mean... You know what I mean."

So, maybe he was interested in her.

She decided to test her theory and licked her lips. Steve's gaze fell immediately to them. Bingo! She got on her tiptoes and gave him a peck on the lips. "Thanks again."

"Sure..." His eyes were stiil closed and she took that as the sign he liked that she kissed him. So she did it again, this time longer. And this time he kissed her back and pressed her against the door. She was a bit surprised that he took the lead but she didn't mind one bit. Not when his lips and body felt so nice pressed against her.

"Can I cook for you tonight?" He asked between kisses.

She looped her arms around him and jumped up and Steve immediately caught her. "Yes." She wrapped her legs around his waist and explored his mouth with her tongue.

"Bedroom's on the right." She whispered against his lips and hoped that he didn't think she was too easy but she really wanted him right now.

"Are you sure?" He searched her eyes and she nodded. He kissed her again and walked with her wrapped around his body to her bedroom.

The lasagna Steve made for her that evening was amazing by the way.


	15. Hi neighbor! (AU)

**_I'm happy you guys liked the last one shot so much!_**

 _AU: Steve tries to find the guts to ask out his pretty neighbor._

* * *

Steve knew he was probably being a creep but he hadn't seen his neighbor for a couple of days and he was just worried about her. He wasn't stalking her, okay. And that's why he was now standing in front of the mail boxes despite having checked his for mail ten minutes ago. Natasha had to come home soon from work and he had seen her with a new guy a couple of times and he just wanted to make sure that she was okay.

He stood there for another ten minutes when the front door finally opened and he heard her laughter. She was on the phone talking to someone and smiling and laughing. Okay, so she seemed okay. He knew that she hadn't had the best luck with guys (she told him so after they run into each other in the hallway after a bad date) and he had feared that the new guy was bad news. But she looked happy and he wondered if it was because of that guy. It probably wasn't nice of him but he hoped that it wasn't because of the guy and she had dumped him. Not that he would ever admit that.

Natasha saw him and waved at him. She ended her phone call and checked her mail box. "Hi neighbor!" She gave him a bright smile and his heart fluttered. Yeah, he had a crush on her. How could he not? She had to be the most beautiful girl he had ever seen and her character seemed to be swell as well.

"Hey Natasha." He smiled back. "How are you?"

"Good!" She brushed her silky red hair behind her ear. "I got a promotion at work. More money is always good." She laughed to herself. "Uh, and I got a cat!" Her eyes lit up at that. "Her name is Liho."

He never really liked cats but he really liked Natasha. "That's awesome!"

She nodded and she turned to take the elevator. "Don't bother, Natasha. It's out of order."

"Again?" She sighed. "Great!" She said dryly and got out of her high heels. "There's no way I'm walking the stairs in these."

She asked him if he was headed for his apartment as well and they walked the five floors together. She asked him about work and congratulated him when he told her that he would illustrate the new children's book of a famous author.

He thanked the universe everyday that their apartments were on the same floor and facing each other. Natasha wished him a nice day and disappeared behind her door. Another chance passed where he didn't ask her out. He had to think of Bucky who already told him that he would ask Natasha out if Steve didn't do it soon. He had seen it enough how women couldn't resist Bucky's good looks and charm. Steve knew that he was attractive since his growth spurt in high school but he still had a hard time when it came to girls. He was thirty years old and he've only had one real relationship that ended years ago.

* * *

"Stop!"

Steve just got the door open to go on his morning run when someone yelled at him. No, not someone. Natasha was yelling at him.

"Stop! Come back! Liho!"

He couldn't react when something tiny and black ran past by him into his apartment. He followed the movement with his head and when he looked back into the hallway Natasha was standing in front of him. "Oh God, I am so sorry that Liho ran into your place! Do you mind if I come in for a second to look for her?"

Liho?! Right, her cat. "Come in." He stepped aside and Natasha was already in his apartment. At least his army training made sure that his place was tidy and he didn't have to fear that she would find old pizza boxes and think he was disgusting.

"Liho!" She was running around his place and making kissing noises. "Liho! Where are you, you stupid cat?!" She turned around to look at him. "I am so sorry for this. This is so embarrassing!"

He waved her off. "Don't worry about it."

He helped her looking for her cat and they found her sleeping under his bed. Both their arms were too short to get the cat and Natasha suggested to shoo her away but Liho looked really cute curled into a sleeping ball under his bed.

"Did you already have breakfast?" He could use the time they would wait for Liho to wake up to get to know her better.

She shook her head. "No, but I don't want to overstay my welcome. It's already bad enough that my cat broke into your place." She laughed quietly and blushed a little bit. She looked really cute with pink cheeks.

"Ah, it's fine." He hoped he was giving her a charming smile. "I really don't mind."

Natasha helped him with breakfast and told him a bit about her and he soaked up every information she gave him. She had been the PA of billionaire Tony Stark and now got a promotion and worked in PR at one of his firms. Her parents were from Russia and unfortunately died shortly after her birth and she grew up with a foster family. He told her that he was raised by a single mom and that he spent every Sunday at his mom's house.

"You probably think that's lame." He said remembering how one woman made fun of that when he went on a date with her after Bucky had been trying to set him up with her for weeks.

She put her coffee down. "What? No, why would I think that? I go camping with Nick and Clint every year for a week. Um, Nick's my foster dad and Clint's my foster brother."

She gave him a warm smile and he thought that this might be the right time to ask her if she wanted to do something together. "Natasha-"

"Meow!" Liho chose that moment to pat into the kitchen and rubbed her head against Natasha's leg. Of course the cat would wake up when he was about to ask her out.

"There you are!" Natasha laughed and picked her cat up. She kissed the cat's head. "Thanks for letting her sleep here."

She offered to help him with the dishes but he told her that it was fine. She thanked him for breakfast and left his apartment with her cat in her arms. And he somehow had the feeling that Liho had known that he was trying to ask Natasha out and interrupted him. But that was impossible, right?

* * *

Bucky convinced him to go with him to a new bar where according to him the hottest women in New York were spending their nights. He was aware that he hadn't been out in quite some time and so he decided to come with him. Not to flirt with women but to spend time with Buck and their friends Thor and Sam who would meet them at the bar. He hadn't seen both of them for some time since he had been working on the illustration for the children's book.

He was locking his door when Bucky greeted someone. "Hello to Steve's beautiful neighbor!" _Natasha._ Steve had been hoping they wouldn't run into her so Bucky couldn't hit on her. Where was Liho when you needed her?!

"Hi." Natasha didn't sound like she seemed charmed by Buck. Steve turned around after he locked the door and he tried his best not to stare at Natasha. She looked incredible. Her hair was in big waves, her make up made her eyes even greener than they were before and she wore a glittery top and tight leather pants. She took his breath away. Oh no, was she going on a date?

"Hey Natasha." He hoped his voice didn't sound too breathless.

She smiled at him. "Hey Steve." Her eyes travelled over his body and he almost swore that she looked like she liked what she saw. "Going out?"

"Um, yes. With friends." He thought it was important that she knew that he wasn't going on a date. He wanted her to know that he was available. For dates. With her.

"Well, have fun." She nodded at him and then walked down the stairs. The elevator was still broken.

"You too!" He yelled after her and he could hear her chuckling.

"Didn't even pay attention to me." Bucky murmured under his breath, sounding quite offended. He was right, Natasha didn't pay much attention to Bucky but she talked to Steve so maybe she was interested in him as well?

* * *

He had been out of town for a few days and just got back an hour ago when someone knocked on his door. Natasha was on the other side of the door with a bun on her head and wore old jeans and a shirt.

"Hi!" She smiled brightly.

He was surprised but happy to see her. This was the first time she knocked on his door. "Hi!"

"Um, I'm sorry to barge in on you like that but you could maybe help me?" She smiled sheepishly at him. "You're my only friend here."

She considered him her friend? He had to smile at that. "Of course, I'll help you! What do you need?"

"I have to bath Liho and give her medicine but she's too sneaky. I need someone to hold her. Could you help me?"

He had the feeling the cat didn't like him since she ruined the moment when he wanted to ask Natasha out a few weeks ago but he would never turn Natasha down when she needed his help. "Sure!"

Liho as it turned out was a freaking beast pretending to be a tiny cat and she managed to get out of his arms a few times but he didn't mind the scratches that much because Natasha laughed so beautiful that it was worth it. He didn't know if bathing a cat always took two hours but they got Liho clean and gave her her medicine.

"Thank you so much, Steve." Natasha touched his arm and he tried his best not to show how much he had liked that. Liho was glaring at them from the top of her cat three. Natasha walked into her open kitchen. "You wanna order something? My treat!"

"Yeah, sure. Thanks!"

She got three flyers from her fridge and gave them to him when she came back to the living room. "Sit." She patted the spot next to her on the couch.

He did as he was told and made sure to leave enough room between them. He didn't want to make her uncomfortable.

"What are you in the mood for?"

"Huh?"

She chuckled and pointed at the flyers in his hands. "Pizza, Chinese or Thai food?"

"Can't go wrong with pizza." He handed her the flyer of the Italian place.

"Ain't that the truth!" She took the flyer and called the place to order. And he realized that he got to spend even more time with her and he silently thanked Liho for being a little beast.

He ended up staying the whole evening at her place eating pizza, drinking beer and talking about God and the world. Natasha was not only beautiful but she was also funny, witty and smart. She had a wicked sense of humour and he was already falling in love with her.

She arched her back and yawned and he couldn't help but find her adorable in that moment. But she was clearly tired and he took it as his cue to leave.

He got up from the couch. "Thanks for the pizza."

"Thank you for helping me with that little monster." She nodded her head into Liho's direction.

Natasha walked him to her door and gave him a short kiss on the cheek. "Good night, Steve."

"Yeah, good night." He managed to blurt out and hoped he wasn't blushing. His skin was still burning where she kissed him. He could still feel her lips on his cheek.

* * *

Steve had been trying to come up with the courage to finally ask Natasha out because he started to think that she liked him too. She called him her friend and wasn't friendship the best foundation for any romance? He was working on a few sketches for the New Yorker when he decided to walk over to her apartment, knock on her door and ask her if she wanted to have dinner with him.

Natasha was locking her door when he got out of his own. She had two big bags with clothes on the floor and was about to pick them up when she saw him and gave him one of her beautiful smiles. The butterflies in his stomach were dancing and he was sure he was grinning like an idiot.

"Wait, let me help you with that." He took the bags and and she thanked him. "Are you going on a trip?"

"Ha, I wish! No, my washing machine broke and I have to use the laundromat until my new one arrives. Apparently Amazon Prime hates me."

"Use mine!" He practically shouted it at her. Oh God, how embarrassing!

Natasha's eyes widened but she seemed amused. "That's very sweet but you already helped me with Liho. I don't want to exploit you."

He was already walking with her bags to his door. "You're not! I got a machine and you can use it."

"Okay, thank you." She followed him into his apartment. "That's really nice of you."

He showed her his washer and left her alone so she could put her laundry in it. Who knew if she had underwear in her bags and he didn't think he had the right to see it. He heard the washing machine and a few seconds later Natasha appeared in his living room.

"Thanks again, Steve." She smiled and then her eyes stopped at his desk. "Wow, did you draw these?"

"Yes."

She walked to the desk and inspected his sketches. "These are amazing! You really are talented."

He was now standing next to her and could smell her perfume. She smelled divine. "Thank you."

She turned to face him and they were only a few inches apart. She was looking up at him and had a little smile on her face. "So..." She placed her hands on his arms. "Are you gonna ask me out or do I have to do it?"

Had he been so obvious? But she didn't look like she didn't want him to ask her. "Will you go on a date with me?"

Her smile grew wider and she was suddenly a bit taller and her hands wandered from his arms up to his neck to pull him down. "I'd love to." And then she pressed her lips on his.

* * *

Liho is the name of the stray cat that tries to warm its way into Natasha's heart and apartment in the comics (in case you didn't know)


	16. The future queen

**_For SilverInk. IvoryQuilt , I hope I fulfilled your request!_**

 _Au: Grand Duchess Natalia Alianovna of Russia travels to London to meet her future husband Prince Steven, the heir to the British Crown._

* * *

Natalia had always been the pride and joy of her father Czar Ivan and naturally she would be the one out of his three daughters to marry the future king of England to strengthen the bonds between the British Empire and Russia. She had never thought about marriage before her father came to her chambers and told her personally about her new future as the wife of a king. Natalia knew that she would have never become the monarch since she was the fourth in line and had always hoped she could breed horses and dance ballet in a small castle near St. Petersburg. And maybe she would have had a fine husband and they would have filled the castle with children. But Natasha as her family called her knew that she had duties as the daughter of the czar and naturally thanked her father for offering her the chance to become the future queen of England. She had never left continental Europe before but now she was on a ship crossing the Northern Sea with her older brother Alexi and her younger sister Wanda to come to England where she would meet her betrothed and they would marry in the next month. Her older sister Maria who met Prince Steven once assured her that he was a handsome man but she couldn't tell her if the prince was a kind man. Natasha personally thought a kind man was more important than a handsome one.

The Queen welcomed her and her siblings and told Natasha that her son was already looking forward to meet his bride. She forced herself to smile and was shown to her new chambers. After the wedding she would be living with her husband in a castle outside of London and they would move back to the palace when Steven would become king. She hoped that Prince Steven would be a good husband and their union would be more than a political one for England and Russian. Natasha always wanted a marriage made of love for herself and she wasn't sure if this would be one. She didn't know Prince Steven, she'd seen portraits and heard stories but she had no idea if he was a man she could fall in love with. And there was this tenacious rumor that Prince Steven originally wanted to wed Lady Margaret who he grew up with. Did her future husband's heart already belong to another?

She was informed that she would meet her fiancé in the royal gardens where they would have the privacy to get to know each other but Natasha knew that their every move would be watched. Her sister Wanda helped her into her gowns and braided her long red hair around her head, her brother Alexi was on his way to meet the king to talk about the dowry.

"You look beautiful, sister!" Wanda smiled at her. "I'm sure the Prince will be delighted when he sees you."

"You think?" She watched herself in the mirror. She had been told a hundred times that she was beautiful girl but what if Steven didn't like red hair? She was told that Lady Margaret was brunette.

"Of course!" Her little sister assured her and wished her good luck when a court lady came to their chambers to escort her to the royal gardens. Natasha did her best to calm her nerves. She was moments away from meeting the man she was going to spend her life with. She prayed that he would be happy with her. She was young, educated and a virgin, all the things a good wife should be.

A tall and well build man was with his back to them when they reached the garden. "Your Royal Highness, this is the Grand Duchess." The court lady introduced her and then left.

Prince Steven turned around and her breath got almost caught in her throat. He was beautiful, his eyes were a beautiful shade of blue and his hair was golden like the sun.

He gave her a polite smile and gave her hand a kiss. "How lovely to finally meet you, your Highness."

She nodded and tried not to blush at the kiss. She had never been alone with a man who wasn't related to her before, let alone had a man touch her like that. "Indeed it is."

They walked side by side through the gardens. "I hope your travels have been pleasant? And please call me Steven."

"Yes, they have been." She gave him a small smile. "Then please call me Natalia."

He smiled and nodded. "Very well, Natalia. I hope England will make you happy. And I hope that I will make you happy. I heard tales about your beauty and I can only add to them. You are a vision."

She felt her cheeks getting warm. "Thank you, Steven." He wanted to make her happy, that sounded promising.

* * *

The king and queen wanted to have a banquet to celebrate her arrival and her engagement to Steven and gifted her a beautiful gown and a tiara. Wanda helped her getting dressed and Alexi escorted her to the ballroom. Wanda was still too young to attend such an event and made Natasha promise to tell her everything later.

"You look lovely as always, dear sister!" Alexi complimented her and offered her his arm before they entered the ball room.

She blushed lighly. "Thank you."

The doors opened and all eyes were on her. Judging her if she was the right fit for their future king, she hoped they thought she would be. Those people could make her life quite uncomfortable if they wanted to.

"Natalia!" Steven came towards them and kissed her hand. She hadn't seen him since their stroll through the garden. "You look stunning!"

"Thank you. You look very handsome." She managed to breathe out. She had no experience with men and she was well aware that her future husband was experienced. He was a few years older than her and no one expected a prince to stay untouched until marriage. She thought it was a bit unfair but she did like the idea that Steven would be the only man to lay with her. She hoped that he wouldn't have mistresses but she knew that there would be nothing she could do if he did.

Alexi snickered beside her and looped her arm around Steven's. "I take it she's in good hands?" Her big brother asked darkly and she wanted to roll her eyes. Alexi took his job of being an older brother to three sisters very seriously.

"Of course!" Steven replied immediately and smiled at her. "I will always take care of my wife."

"Good." Alexi grunted and left to find his seat.

"Let me apologize for my brother's behavior." She began but Steven shook his head in amusement.

"You don't have to, Natalia. It was his job to protect you." He pulled her chair out for her when they reached the table. "And now it's mine." He whispered into her ear and she prayed that she was hiding her shiver. Steven said he wanted to make her happy and now he told her his job was to protect her. She watched Steve the whole evening and she decided that he was a man that she could fall in love with. He gave her a bright smile after his father's speech and she thought to herself that she was maybe already falling for him. She hoped he felt the same, it would make their marriage so much easier.

* * *

Natasha was sitting on a bench in the royal gardens reading about her new family's history. She was educated about the British Crown and spoke English flawlessly but she had to know everything about the country she was going to be queen of one day.

"Your Highness?" A woman was standing before her doing a curtsy and then smiled kindly at her. "Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Lady Margaret."

The woman her financé was potentially in love with. She eyed her carefully. Lady Margaret was beautiful and seemed to be of Steven's age. She was a real woman and not a girl like Natasha. Natasha knew she had the body of a woman but she was still so inexperienced in so many things. Margaret oozed elegance and elegance.

"What a pleasure to meet you!" Natasha faked a smile. "I heard so much about you!" She hoped she could bait Lady Margaret with that but she showed no reaction.

"May I?" Margaret pointed at the bench and Natasha moved to make room for her. She just had to get to know the woman who maybe hold Steven's heart. She had to know how to win it back. Maybe she was naive and too romantic but she wanted her husband to love her. Her parents had been in love and they had been so happy until her mother died. She wanted that too.

Margaret smiled at her and Natasha wanted to like her, she seemed nice. "Steven has told me quite a lot about you." Margaret chuckled lightly. "He's quite smitten with you!"

"He is?" Natasha blurted out. Why was Lady Margaret telling her this?

"Oh, yes. He was so worried that you wouldn't like him." She gave Natasha a warm smile. "I assume you've heard stories about me and Steven. But do not worry, none of them are true. We grew up together and we are the greatest friends but there is no romance between us. My heart belongs to another, Daniel. I hope to wed him soon."

Now it was Natasha's turn to smile. She believed Margaret, she had no reason to lie to her since Steven could have a relationship with her and Natasha couldn't have done a thing about it. "Thank you for telling me this, Lady Margaret."

"Please call me Peggy, Your Highness."

"Then I insist that you call me Natalia."

Natasha felt like she made her first friend here.

* * *

A few days after her encounter with Peggy a servant escorted her to the royal stables where Steven to her utter surprise was waiting for her with two horses.

"I heard you loved horses?"

She smiled and nodded. Two servants helped her into a gown that was more fitting for horse back riding and Steven helped her onto the horse. Her horse was a beautiful dark stallion named Fury. She felt a connection to him immediately.

"Is it suitable that we are doing this?" She asked Steven after they left the stables and she realized that no one was coming with them.

"As long as we stay in the gardens of the palace." He assured her with a smile. "We won't get in trouble, Natalia. My mother even suggested it so we could get to know each other better. We are going to spend our lifes together after all."

Steven made his horse canter and she and Fury chased after him. Steven kept turning his head to smile at her and she couldn't help but grin back. For the first time she felt completely happy and at home in England. He led her to a pond with a waterfall surrounded by a field of flowers. It was so beautiful here.

"This is my favorite place." Steve said smiling. "And by the look on your beautiful face you seem to agree."

She knew she was blushing and gave Steven a coy smile. She wished she knew how to behave in a man's presence. He descended from his horse and walked over to her to help her. She put her hands on his shoulders and he had his hands on her waist and she hoped she wasn't blushing even harder now. No man had ever touched her there before. Steve helped her down and their hands didn't move one inch. He looked down at her, he was so much taller than her.

He smiled and looked at her like no one had before. "Can I kiss you, Natalia?"

She nodded because she wasn't sure if her voice was still working. His smile got wider and he lowered his head and pressed his lips against hers. Did Steven know this was her first kiss? He moved his lips slowly against her and then the kiss was already over. Out of instinct she followed him when he pulled away.

Steven chuckled lightly and caressed her waist where he still had his hands. "We can take it slow, Natalia. We have all the time in the world. We don't have to rush anything." He cupped her cheek with his hand. "I don't want you to think you have to do certain things because you think it's your duty to me."

She was incredibly relieved by that. She had been scared when she thought about the wedding night and what was expected from her. But now she wasn't so scared anymore, Steven would be patient and gentle.

"Thank you, Steve." She bit her lip. "Steven, I'm sorry." She had no right to give the future king some kind of nickname.

But he smiled and gave her a brief kiss that made her stomach flutter. "Don't be. I like it." He stroked her cheekbone with his thumb. "Can I call you Natasha?"

She nodded and wondered if it was okay she would kiss him this time. She looked from his eyes to his soft lips and then back at his blue eyes. Steve nodded lightly and she stood up on her tiptoes to press her lips against his. He sucked on her lower lip and a moan left her body.

She pulled immediately away from him. "Oh God. I must apologize!"

He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "No need. It just shows me that you liked it."

Her face felt warm. "Yes, I did." She admitted and looked at the grass. She never felt anything like this before.

He tilted her chin with his hand up. "I have something for you." He got some small out of his saddlebag and offered it to her on his palm. She gasped when she saw what it was. He wanted to give her a beautiful gold ring with a round emerald in the middle. "The stone reminded me of your eyes, Natasha."

"Thank you!" She breathed out and Steve slid the ring on her finger. "I love it."

"I hope this ring represents the beginning of a long and happy union." He kissed her again and Natasha had to admit that she really liked kissing. "There's only you from now on, Natasha. I will always be loyal and faithful to you."

She believed him and couldn't wait to start her new life as his wife and queen.

* * *

 _Fury, I'm sorry I turned you into a horse!_

 _Writing Natasha as a blushing virgin was harder than I thought it would be but it fitted the story better since woman had to stay pure and innocent until marriage._


	17. I don't love you but I always will

**For Sportsfan64 and Miss. Dre, I combined your prompts since I thought they would fit together. I hope you both like it!**

 _Natasha desperately tries to fight her feelings for Steve until the words just slip out._

* * *

There were a lot of things Natasha Romanoff didn't do. She didn't giggle, she didn't go to stupid sport games, and she definitely didn't go shopping at IKEA. She hated that place, it was always full with people and screaming kids, the furniture always looked the same and no one needed so many fucking candles. Electricity had been invented for a reason, people!

So when Steve Rogers asked her if she would come to him to IKEA because he needed bookshelves and other stuff, she said immediately no. She was still waiting that someone proved her wrong in her theory that IKEA was hell's precipice. One wrong turn and she was pretty sure that you would end up in front of satan.

"Please Natasha!" He gave her his puppy eyes over coffee after a debriefing with the Avengers and Fury.

She tried to stand her ground which was hard when Steve was looking at her like that. "Nope, no. I'm not setting one foot into that hellhole! Take Barnes with you!"

"You know he can't leave the Tower yet and I want my place in Brooklyn be ready when he can." His hand was suddenly on top of hers and she hated herself for enjoying it so much. "Please Nat. It's gonna be fun. I'll make you pancakes afterwards!"

She sometimes wondered if Steve knew that she had a soft spot for him. She were honest she would at least admit that it was more than a soft spot. "Ugh, fine! But you better throw lots of chocolate chips into the pancakes!"

Steve grinned widely and gave her hand a squeeze before he let go of it. "Deal!"

She still hated IKEA after their trip but she did find a cute lamp for her bedroom and Steve seemed to know that it was smarter not to say anything about it. At least she didn't buy those fucking candles. Having Captain America has your friend also meant that he didn't need any help carrying up the packages (he carried two bookshelves, a sideboard and a bed for Bucky's room up at once) and so she carried the chocolate chips (she brought her own in case Steve was cheap with them) and enjoyed the view of his ass while he walked up the stairs in front of her. She'd been around the globe more than once and seen a fair amount of nice asses and Steve had the best one she'd ever seen. She really wanted to sink her teeth into his bottom but that would mean that she had to tell him that she had a thing for him (again if she were honest she would admit that it was more than a thing) and he had to have a thing for her too and then maybe he let her bite his ass.

"Nat?"

She looked up from Steve's ass and hoped he didn't know what she had been thinking about. "Huh?" She thanked her training for giving her the skill to control her blushing.

"Could you maybe get my keys?" Now Steve was slightly blushing. "There in my front pocket."

She didn't smirk at him because he was already embarrassed enough and dug her hand into his pocket. Did she imagine things or did his breath hitch? She got the keys out and unlocked the door to Steve's apartment in Brooklyn. A lot had changed since the last she had been here. She knew that Steve was renovating it for him and Barnes so they could live here together. She would never forget how happy Steve was when they finally found Bucky two months ago.

"I assume you want my help to get that furniture up?" She followed him into the living room where he put the packages on the ground.

"That would be nice but you don't have to." He took the chocolate chips out of her hands. "Let's have pancakes first."

Steve's pancakes were delicious as always and she let herself persuade into helping him with the furniture and she took great pleasure when Steve began to curse at the instructions of the bed. The bookshelves were no problem for them but they were already trying to assemble Bucky's bed for an hour.

"It's like they don't want us to get that bed done!" Steve growled and stared at the manual. "I'm starting to understand your aversion against IKEA."

"Thank you!" She tried to connect two beams of the bed frame. "You think Tony would be good at this?"

"And then never hear the end about how we can't even build a fucking bed?" Steve huffed. "No, thanks!"

She nodded, Steve was right. Tony would be having a field day with this. After another hour of cursing they got the bed done. "Your pal better be thankful to us!" She said to Steve when he put the mattress on.

Steve smiled at her. "I'm sure he will."

Natasha got out of her boots and crawled on the bed.

"Um, what are you doing? Are you tired? You can sleep in my bed. I still have to put sheets on this one."

She patted the empty room beside her. "Come on. We have to make sure it doesn't crash down any minute!"

Steve chuckled but got into the bed. Natasha jumped on the bed a bit and rolled around to make sure their construction was stable. Steve was laughing at her and she loved the sound of it. She bounced and then smacked against Steve's side. He was still laughing and then rolled on his side to face her. He stopped laughing and had this look on his face he sometimes had when he thought she wasn't looking.

He brushed a strain of hair behind her ear. "Hi."

Her heart was hammering against her rib cage and every voice in her head told her to get out of this bed. "Hey."

Steve's gaze fell to her lips and his hand moved from her ear to her cheek. He stroked her cheek and leaned in closer. No, what was he doing? And what was _she_ doing? No, no. This was wrong. She couldn't give into Steve. It went against everything she was told.

She jumped out of the bed in one movement and got back into her boots. She didn't have the courage to look at Steve. She probably had hurt him. "Thanks for the pancakes!" She yelled over her shoulder and ran to the door.

"Natasha!"

She ignored him and shut the door behind her. She knew that Steve had some kind of feelings for her. He wore his heart on his sleeve. But she couldn't kiss him. It didn't matter what she felt for him, it didn't matter that she was in love with him. Love was for children and children were weak. And Natasha would never be weak again.

* * *

Steve had been keeping his distance since their almost kiss. Not that she could blame him for it. She had been sending him mixed signals for months now. She had been so close a few times to give in and tell him what he meant to her. She wanted to kiss him senseless, she was starting to lose her fucking mind. Steve was always in her thoughts and dreams.

She came back with Tony from a conference and was too tired to go back to her place and decided to stay at the Tower for the night. She was hungry and JARVIS informed her that there was take out in the common kitchen. Already in her outfit for the night ( a shirt she stole from Steve months ago) she patted to the kitchen and found pad thai in the fridge and dug in.

When she looked up from her food Steve was suddenly in the kitchen. "Um, hi." She looked at her (his) shirt but didn't say anything about it.

She almost choked on her noodles. "Hi. I hope you're not here for the pad thai?"

"No." He shook his head and walked to the water kettle. "Making tea for Buck and me."

"Ah." She kept eating and hoped that she would be somehow able to disappear. They hadn't really talked since that afternoon and she didn't know what to say. Love was never something she was supposed to feel. It was compromising and she didn't want to go soft. And she couldn't afford to be soft, it was what would got you killed in this job.

"Nat?" Steve was suddenly beside her. "Do you want a tea?"

She put the food container down. "No, thanks. I'm heading to bed now."

Steve's hand was suddenly on her wrist and he spun her around and she collided with his strong chest. "Natasha, talk to me. Am I the only one who-"

She couldn't talk about this. She wasn't a woman of words, she was a woman of action. She cupped his face and crashed her lips on his. Steve made a surprised sound but then he kissed her back. And oh boy, what a great kisser he was when he wasn't ambushed on an escalator. He tilted her head into an better angle and deepened the kiss. She nibbled on his lower lip and used his sigh to push her tongue into his mouth. Kissing him was amazing, she wanted to kiss him forever.

Steve pulled away when her lungs started to burn and smiled brightly at her. "Finally." He whispered and kissed her temple. "I knew I wasn't the only one with feelings."

 _Feelings_. There it was. Had she been another woman, she would have confessed her love for him and taken him to her room but she was just Natasha who had always been told that love was for children and she never got to be one. "I shouldn't have kissed you. I'm sorry."

Steve's face fell and she felt like someone punched her in the gut. She moved away from him and threw the container into the trash. "Let's forget that ever happened." She didn't turn around on her way out of the kitchen to see Steve's face.

* * *

Steve was now completely avoiding her and she had to fight the urge to go to him and tell him how sorry she was and that she loved him. She wanted to be with him but she was taught that she would be better off on her own. God, she was so fucked up.

Barnes seemed to know what happened between her and Steve because he kept looking at her funny and came up with really weird excuses why Steve didn't come to the teambonding events anymore. They could be glad that the Avengers didn't need to assemble because that would have ended badly with two Avengers not talking to each other. Another reason why she could never tell Steve that she loved him.

Today was Tony's birthday party and Natasha knew that Steve couldn't avoid her today. She had been thinking about not going to Tony's party but he was her friend and not going because Steve would be there was something a teenager would do and not a grown woman.

She got into the dress she bought on her shopping trip with Pepper and Maria and put her hair into a low bun. She painted her lips in a dark red and caught herself hoping that Steve would like the way she looked. Nope, it didn't matter what he thought.

People were already dancing on the bar when she came to Tony's penthouse and her eyes scanned the room for Steve. No!, she chided herself. Stop that, you can't lead him on. Or yourself.

She saw Banner and walked over to him. He told her about doctors without borders and she did her best to focus only on him. But her eyes did wander around the room and she spotted Steve talking to Sharon. What the fuck was she doing here? And was she hitting on Steve? _He's mine!_ She thought darkly and surprised herself with her possessiveness.

"Anyway, that's why I can't wait to travel to Haiti." Bruce finished his story. Right, he was talking to her.

"That's great!" She said absently and kept watching Steve and Sharon. Sam joined them and gave Sharon a brief kiss. Wait, what? Were Sam and Sharon a thing? Had she been jealous for no reason? Not that she was allowed to be jealous with the way she dealt with her feelings for Steve.

She danced with Tony since it was his birthday and than with Pepper who turned out to be an amazing dancer and later after a few (okay many) shots she got on the bar and danced there. People were cheering and for the first time in months Steve wasn't on her mind and she just enjoyed moving to the music. She missed her step, lost her balance and fell. Fucking vodka!

Strong arms caught her and of course he would be the one to catch her. She looked up at Steve. "Hey!"

"Are you okay? Are you hurt?"

"Nope!" She giggled and cursed the vodka. She did not giggle! "Your eyes are really pretty!"

"Thanks." He said awkwardly and he was still carrying her. Where the other people even still here?

"I hate it that you don't talk to me." She slurred out. "You're my favorite person." God, Natasha stop talking. "Ya lyublyu tebya!" Ah, fuck! She said it! Fuck, fuck, fuck!

"What?" Steve put her back on the ground. "What did you say? You gotta speak English with me. Or French."

Thank you, Jesus! "Nothing." She said quickly and then got nauseous. "Sorry!" She covered her hand with her mouth and ran to the nearest bathroom to pray to the porcelain god. She definitely had too much to drink. She washed her mouth and got out of the bathroom.

Barnes was blocking her way. She didn't even notice he was at the party. "Steve may not speak Russian but I do. Stop playing with him and tell him finally that you love him!" He clenched his jaw. "Do you even know how much you're hurting him? He loves you so much and you keep pushing away. Stop that!"

Bucky was already on his way back to the party. "I have no idea what you're talking about!"

He looked over his shoulder. "Steve's not the only one with enhanced hearing!"

Fuck! She hoped that Barnes would keep his mouth shut. She really didn't want to kill Steve's best friend.

 _Do you even know how much you're hurting him? He loves you so much and you keep pushing away._ Barnes' voice kept haunting her dreams that night.

* * *

Another week passed where Steve avoided her like the pest but they had to assemble to take down a HYDRA cell in the Ukraine. The thugs had a lot of firepower but they overpowered them within an hour. Steve only spoke to her to give her orders and stayed away from her as far as possible. They got the job done but they couldn't act like this on every mission. She had to talk to him. She had to lie and tell him she only saw him as a friend. That way both of them could move on and Steve could find a nice girl that wasn't as fucked up as she was. She just hoped that Barnes had kept his mouth shut.

She was walking over the field of the HYDRA base when she suddenly heard a shot and then another one. A bullet grazed her hair. Someone was firing at her. She looked around but had nowhere to hide. Fuck! Someone threw themselves on her and tackled her to the ground. "Don't move!" Steve hissed into her ear and covered her head with his hands. His whole body was covering her and no bullet hit her. But there were still gunshots and Steve was grunting in pain. God no, they were shooting at him! Not him, she tried to move to turn them so the bullets would hit her but Steve pressed her even harder into the ground. He was so much stronger than her and she was trapped. The gunshots stopped.

"Steve?" She whispered and her heart was racing. "Steve?"

No answer.

"Guys!" Sam yelled and Steve was suddenly not on top of her anymore. "Steve! Fuck!"

Natasha rolled onto her back and looked around. Blood was on the ground next to her and Steve's eyes were closed. Sam moved Steve and his eyes widened in horror. "We need evac now! Cap's hurt pretty bad!"

What? She crawled to Steve. He had multiple wounds in his back and legs. "Steve!" She screamed and fear was running through her veins. "Steve!"

The quinjet landed and Rhodey and Sam put him on a stretcher. She ran after them and nearly knocked Rhodey out of the way to get to Steve. He was like this because of her. He could die because of her. Steve was so pale and he looked so lifeless. What if he died? He couldn't just leave her!

Sam rolled Steve on his stomach and cut his suit open. "We have to stop the bleeding until we're in Germany."

"Nat? Are you hurt?" Tony's hand was suddenly on her stomach and when he pulled it away it was covered in blood. She looked down and saw the blood. Weird, it didn't even hurt. One bullet must have went straight through Steve and hit her. She put her fingers into her wound and could feel the bullet. Tony tried to push her onto another stretcher. "No! We need to help Steve!"

She pushed Tony out of the way and helped Sam to temporally close his wounds. The adrenaline rush vanished and she started to feel the pain but ignored it. She moved to Steve's head and brushed his sweaty hair out of his face.

His eyes fluttered. "Steve?"

"Nat?" He groaned and blinked his eyes open briefly. "You're safe!" He sighed and closed his eyes again.

"Steve? Open your eyes for me!" She bend her knees so her head was one the same level as his. "Steve? I...I love you. Please don't die!"

Steve's eyes opened. "I love you." Then he closed his eyes again.

"Um, are we supposed to pretend we just didn't hear that?" Tony asked and Rhodey smacked his shoulder. "What?"

The OR was ready for Steve when they landed in Berlin and she wanted to go with him but Sam (that traitor!) told the doctors that she had been shot as well and they dragged her to another OR. She was trying to shake them off but one nurse had an iron grip on her (really, did that nurse get injected with the super serum as well?!) and then Sam told her that Steve would never forgive her if she didn't get that wound treated so she yielded up to her fate. After a few colorful threats they gave her only a local anesthesia to get the bullet out. She changed into the clothes one of her boys dropped off at her hospital room and joined the others in the waiting room.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Tony snapped at her. "You're supposed to be resting! You got shot!"

She glared at him and he offered her his seat. They had to wait two hours until they pushed Steve out of the OR and were told that without the serum he would have died. Even with the serum it was a miracle that he survived. Only one person was allowed in Steve's room for now and Sam, Rhodey and Tony immediately said it should be her. She had the nagging feeling it had something to do with what they had witnessed on the quinjet. Great, now four people knew that she loved Steve. She really hoped Steve had been too out to realize what she had said.

She waited another hour by his side until his eyes fluttered and he opened them after a few minutes. "Steve? Should I get the nurse?"

"You love me, huh?" He was grinning at her.

Fuck! So much for hoping that he would forget that. Should she lie? Lying to Captain America after he almost died because of her was probably even low for her. "Yes." She whispered and looked at her hands on his bed. "But I'll get over it."

His big hand was suddenly covering hers."I don't want you to get over it. Nat, look at me." He said softly and she did. "I love you. I've loved you for so long."

She shook her head and pulled her hand away. "No, we can't. I can't. I can't be weak. Love is for children!" She stood up and the fast movement made her wound throb in pain. She had to sit down again.

"Nat? Are you hurt?"

"It's fine."

"Why is loving me making you weak? My love for you makes me strong!" He said fiercely and tried to grab her hand.

"Steve, you almost died today. That's the opposite of being strong!"

"I will always take the hit for you!" She opened her mouth. "I'm not finished. I wasn't talking about what happened today when I said that loving you makes me strong. Natasha, I was losing my mind after waking up from the ice. I hated it here, I hated very goddamn minute here. The only time I didn't hate it was when I was with you. You gave me the strength to adapt to this world, you helped me see the beauty in this world. I would be so lost without you."

"Steve..."

"I love you, nothing can change that. And I want to be with you. I never wanted anything more in my life. But I would never pressure you into anything. If you don't want to be with me then I have to accept that."

"I don't know how to do any of this." She admitted. "I wasn't raised to be loving or wanting any of these things."

"I don't know how to be in a relationship either." Steve said and she could see the hope in his eyes. "I wouldn't even notice if you muck things up."

What if Steve had died today? She wouldn't have been able to live with the guilt but she would have also wondered for the rest of her life what could have happen between them. "I probably will push you away from time to time."

"Well, I've been told that I'm a stubborn son of a bitch!"

"I could run away."

"Good thing I'm faster than you."

"I have a truckload of issues. I'm probably a handful to date."

Steve lifted his arms shortly up. "Good thing I have two!"

Despite herself she had to laugh at his joke. "I've killed." She mumbled.

"So have I."

"That's not the same and you know it." He had killed to protect, she had killed to just spill blood.

"Natasha, stop trying to make me not wanting this. It won't happen. I love you and I always will!"

She laced their fingers together and decided to ignore everything the Red Room taught her. It was time to do what Natasha wanted. "But don't say I didn't warn you."

Steve's face lit up. "Does that mean you want to try?" He seemed excited. "You want to be my girl?" She nodded not trusting her voice right now. She never had belong to anyone. She always had been alone but the idea of being his warmed her heart. _I have no place in the world._ Maybe her place in this world was by Steve's side.

Steve beamed at her. "Can I get a kiss?" He smiled sheepishly.

She laughed and leaned over him to give him a soft kiss. "Thank you for saving my life today, Steve."

"Thank you for bringing me back to life after the ice. I love you."

She took a deep breath. "I love you, too."


	18. Shall we play a game?

_**For Sportsfan64**_

 _Natasha and Steve play a game to see who gives into their feelings first_

* * *

Natasha liked playing games. Didn't matter if it were actual games or mind games, she loved them and she won them.

She didn't really remember how it started but she was now playing a game with Steve and she damn well was going to win it no matter how upset she was when she saw Steve playing it. Somewhere between working for SHIELD and helping Steve adapt to this world they both started to have feelings for each other. But they both were too stubborn to make a move. Or maybe she was too stubborn and Steve wanted her to set the pace because she clearly had commitment issues (the shrink at SHIELD made her well aware of that). They were dancing around each other for months now, flirting with each other and practically everything they did together could count as dates if one of them would actually say the word. But they also tried to push the other into admitting their feelings by flirting with other people. Well, she was flirting so Steve would finally snap and kiss her senseless (and do other things to her...) while Steve was being his charming and sweet self to every woman he met. She sometimes wondered if he did it to make her jealous or if he didn't even know that he was flirting with them. She knew that Steve was a kind man and could be oblivious to women's intentions but she also knew that Steve Rogers was a little shit and was waiting for her to snap and kiss him senseless (and boy did she want to do other things to him!).

She needed to find a guy to flirt with that would really make Steve fume.

Tony? Like anyone would ever believe she could have a thing for him and Pepper was her friend so Tony was a fat no.

Bruce? God no, for so many reasons.

Sam? Too loyal to Steve.

Fury? Jesus fucking Christ NO!

That only left Clint who was married but no one sides her and Fury knew that. There had always been rumors at SHIELD that her and Clint were a thing so why not use that to make Steve jealous. She needed him to be the first one to give in. And she was still mad at Steve for flirting with that waitress who he apparently saved during the battle of New York. So what? He saved tons of people that day! But of course Steve being Steve was nice to her and took a selfie with her and talked to her for over ten minutes while Natasha had to sit there waiting to finally fucking order! She almost thought that Steve would finally break because she made sure to wear a top that showed a bit of her lace bra and she did notice how Steve's gaze sometimes fell to her cleavage before he blushed and quickly looked away. She had already been imagining Steve pushing her against the elevator wall as soon as they were alone but that clearly didn't happen not after he was flirting with that waitress.

Thankfully Clint was currently in DC because he was needed at the Triskelion and she used that chance to work on her plan to make Steve finally snap. She should probably wear only sexy underwear from now on since he would hopefully very soon ravish her and she wanted to leave an impression. She tracked Clint down at the shooting range testing a new bow and she didn't even have to scare anyone away since they were the only ones down here.

"Hey Clint!"

He didn't turn around and shot an arrow naturally hitting his target right between the eyes. "What's up, Tasha?"

"Would it be cool if I tell Steve that we're hooking up?"

The next arrow hit the ceiling. "What the fuck?"

"Can I tell Steve that you and I are hooking up?"

"I heard you the first time. Why on earth would you want to tell him that?" He asked and then rolled his eyes. "Oh God, are you two still doing this weird thing where you're not admitting you have the hots for each other and flirt with other people?"

"Maybe. So are you cool with that?"

"No, I'm not. And like he would believe that! Just knock on his door in a trench coat and let it fall to your feet to reveal some lingerie. Or wear nothing at all, whatever floats your boat. I'm sure he can't resist you and you two can stop this stupid thing." Clint shouldered his bow. "I heard the story about that poor Level 4 agent who you flirted with before training and Cap later almost broke him in the ring out of jealousy. Just tell the guy that you like him. We both know he won't turn you down!"

"But that would mean that I would give in and I don't lose. Ever!" She left the shooting range thinking about guys she could make Steve jealous with. Agent Ward? No. Rumlow? Oh God no, even though she knew that he would be game. Maybe Trip, he was cute. Yeah, maybe she should hit on Trip. He seemed like a guy who liked to flirt.

She was on her way looking for Trip when she spotted Steve talking to Sharon in the hallway. Sharon was telling Steve something and kept touching him while playing with her hair. God, could she be any more obvious? Steve smiled down at her and laughed after Sharon was finished with whatever boring story she just told him.

She decided to look for Trip later so she could now interrupt Steve and Sharon. "Steve." She gave him a nod and then looked at Sharon. "Carter!" She thought it was important to remind Steve that Sharon was related to Peggy.

"Natasha, hi." Steve's eyes sparkled and she knew that he knew that she had been watching him with Sharon. Of course he did. Fucker!

"Agent Romanoff." Sharon gave her a polite smile but she could see that she was bothered that she interrupted her talk with Steve. Ha!

"Good that I run into you, Carter! Agent Koeing is looking for you." She lied.

Sharon grimaced and walked away. But the she looked over her shoulder before she stepped into the elevator. "Just text me when you want to get that coffee, Steve!"

"I will!"

So he was going to get coffee with her? Why did he even bother getting to know another woman? They both knew that they would get together (if one of them would finally give in!). "Are you visiting Peggy together?" She asked innocently. "How lovely!"

Amusement flickered briefly over his face. "No, no. I just thought that we should get to know each other better. Maybe I should have asked her out to dinner. What do you think?" He grinned at her, clearly baiting her.

"I think I should get home to get ready for my date with my ex. You remember Matt? He's in town and why not have some fun." Matt was not in town but Steve knew that they used to have a thing and judging by the way his jaw was clenching he clearly bought it.

"Didn't you end things for a reason?"

"I'm not saying that we're getting back together!" Steve looked visibly relieved. "All I'm saying is that we could have some fun if ya know what I mean!" She winked at him and his face darkened.

She wanted to leave but he grabbed her arm. "Natasha..." He looked deeply into her eyes and she was sure that he would finally kiss her. But then he grinned. "Have fun!" He let go of her arm and walked away. Fuck, did he see through her?

She drove home and spent the evening on her couch watching Netflix. She texted Steve the next day if he wanted to go with her to a food festival but he wrote back that he was finally having that coffee with Sharon.

Fuck, fuck, fuck! What if he hooked up with her? She knew that the others (mostly Tony) thought that Steve was a blushing virgin but she knew the truth about him and those USO girls, Steve told her about it himself and she knew that he hadn't been lying about that. What if the chemistry between him and Sharon would lead to them spending the night together? Natasha knew that she and Steve weren't together and she had to reason to feel that way but she hoped that he wouldn't sleep with Sharon. It would change things between them. She only flirted with other guys, she would never have sex with them. The only one she wanted to sleep with was Steve. But what if Steve didn't feel the same way about her? Maybe he just liked flirting with her and didn't want to change things between them. Maybe he was actually into Sharon and wanted to see where things could go between them. What if Natasha had only imagined things and Steve didn't want her like that. One reason why she didn't make a move was that she didn't want to lose the game (and she started to think that maybe she was the only one playing it because Steve wasn't interested in her) but another reason, the main reason, was that she didn't have the guts to make a move on him. She didn't really know how real relationships worked and she was bit scared and hoped that Steve would initiate more between them. She decided that she would stop playing this game, that way she didn't really lose because she didn't give in but she also could protect her heart if Steve wanted Sharon and not her.

* * *

Natasha didn't see much of Steve in the next days and she kept wondering if he went on more dates with Sharon. Maybe they were already an official item. Her stomach twisted in knots at that thought. She tried to find out what was going on between Steve and Sharon but the SHIELD gossip had nothing on them. She hoped that was good sign and nothing was going on between them. Why did the Red Room have to fuck her up so badly and she couldn't just go to him and kiss him?

Fury sent her with Steve to Mexico to check out one of El Chapo's cartels that was last located outside of Mexico City. She wanted to ask Steve if he was dating Sharon but she couldn't find the words. Mostly because she didn't want to hear him say yes.

They were hiding in the hills observing the area for the cartel when Steve suddenly broke the silence. "How did your date go?"

She looked up from her rifle. What was he talking about? "Date?"

"Your date with Murdock?"

Oh, right. "Um, he cancelled." She lied and turned her head to look through the lens of the rifle. So far no movement. She started to think that the intel was outdated and the cartel was somewhere else.

"He's an idiot." Steve whispered quietly. Wait, did he really think that date was real? She thought he had seen right through her when she told him about it. Should she ask him about Sharon?

She didn't ask him about Carter in the end and they spent the whole night hiding on that hill waiting and nothing happened. The sun was already up when they decided to drive back to Mexico City. Natasha was mostly annoyed that Fury sent them on a fruitless mission and her body ached from laying on the ground for hours.

She put the sniping rifle in the trunk and then sat down behind the wheel. She made it clear to Steve quite earlier in their partnership that she would be driving, always.

"You already know what you'll get Tony for his birthday?" Steve asked her while they drove through the Mariposa Monarca reserve. Right, Tony's birthday was right around the corner.

"Haven't really thought-" She stopped speaking when she saw a few butterflies. Wait a minute, wasn't there something about butterflies and Mexico? She drove off the small round and followed the butterflies.

"Nat, what are you doing?"

"You'll see!" She kept following the butterflies and could see more and more of them. She stopped the car when she couldn't drive any further into the forest and got out.

"Natasha!" Steve got out of the car as well but she wasn't looking at him. She walked further into the forest. "Nat, wait! Where are you going?"

She stopped in front of giants firs that were covered by thousands of butterflies. She remembered their name again, they were monarch butterflies. She was surrounded by butterflies and the beauty of it made her laugh. There had to be millions of butterflies in the area, it was breathtaking. She turned around to Steve. "Isn't it beautiful?" She could barely see him through the butterflies.

He had a look on his face she'd never seen before. "Yeah, it is."

She turned away from Steve to watch the butterflies again. It was truly remarkable and she wasn't mad at Fury anymore for sending them to Mexico. Who knew if she would get to see it otherwise.

Steve's hand was suddenly on her arm and he turned her around. She wanted to ask if everything was okay but then his lips were on hers and her brain stopped working. All she could think about was Steve finally kissing her senseless and pressing her against his body while millions of butterflies were flying around them. She wasn't a sucker for romance but that sounded pretty fucking romantic to her. They kissed until they were both out of breath and she had to break the kiss.

Steve stroked her cheek with his thumb. "I couldn't wait any longer."

She was probably grinning like an idiot but she didn't give a fuck. "Kiss me again, Rogers!"

He smiled at her and slanted his lips over hers and he really was an amazing kisser. She wanted him to kiss every inch of her body. "So you're not interested in Sharon?" She had to make sure.

"What? Of course not!" He brushed her hair behind her ear. "There's only one girl I want!"

Happy with the answer she wrapped her arms around his waist and leaned her cheek against his chest. "Hey, you kissed me! I won!"

Steve chuckled into her hair. "I feel like I won as well."

Natasha drove them back to Mexico City where they took a regular plane back to DC and she and Steve informed SHIELD that they would take the next days off and she drove them straight in her Corvette to her place where Steve kissed every inch of her body and he finally did all the things to her she wanted him to for months.

* * *

 _Thank you for your reviews, faves and follows!_


	19. Roommates

_Natasha's apartment is flooded and Steve offers her to stay at his place._

* * *

Steve just got back yesterday from a mission with Natasha and he only was now at the Triskelion to sign papers regarding the mission and then he would enjoy his day off. Maybe he would drive around Maryland with his Harley or read up on all the history he missed during his time in the ice. He was just walking past by Natasha's office when he heard her voice. What was she doing here? She usually let him deal with the paper work and only was at the Triskelion when she had to be and just like him Fury gave her the day off.

"Fuck!" Natasha sounded agitated. "You were my last hope, Clint. You could have told me sooner that you sold your place!" There was a pause. "I already tried that! Guess I have to crash here for now. Yeah, yeah. Thanks for nothing!"

Steve felt the need to make sure she was okay. Why would she have to crash here? He had been to her place a few times, her apartment was amazing. He stepped into her office and noticed several suitcases and duffel bags. "Um, are you moving in?"

She turned around looking like she didn't notice him standing in the door frame. "Hi. Well, kinda." She plopped down on the couch groaning. He now saw the pillow and blanket on the couch and the couch didn't look like a good sleeping place.

"Nat, why are you sleeping here?"

"My whole apartment got flooded. The pipes burst and now everything's ruined." She pointed at her suitcases. "That's all I could save. It will be weeks until I can go back and all the hotels are booked and Clint sold his apartment weeks ago, so I have to stay here."

"You can stay with me." He said out of reflex but he meant it. She couldn't stay here and he had a guest room.

"Steve, that's very kind but I don't want to bother you." She said and folded her blanket.

"You're not. You can stay with me."

She seemed like she was thinking about his offer. "You sure?"

"Yeah, it's gonna be fun!" He grinned and helped her get her stuff back into her car.

* * *

He went with Natasha to her apartment and he was shocked when he saw the state it was in. Apparently the pipes burst while they had been on their mission and Nat came home to this. Her furniture was destroyed, the wall paper hanging off the wall and the wood floor was ruined. He felt so bad for her when she was told that it would take weeks to fix everything.

"As soon as I find somewhere else to stay, I'll be out of your hair." She said standing in her destroyed living room.

He shook his head. "Nat, you can stay as long as you want. I really don't mind. And I will help you with your apartment." He didn't know how to ask her without offending her. "Um, do you need money to replace everything? I can loan you some."

"That's not necessary but thank you." She gave him a smile and walked over to her bookshelf. Steve really didn't think a lot of books survived the flooding. The planks of the wooden floor suddenly broke and he was thankfully fast enough to catch her before she could visit her downstairs neighbors. He slung his arm around her waist and pulled her against him so she wouldn't fall. "Thanks, Steve!" She patted his arm and he let go of her.

They both looked through the hole into the apartment below them. The supper was staring back. "This will take longer than a few weeks, Miss Romanoff."

"You think?" Nat snapped back and then looked at him. "You wanna get some drinks?"

"It's 10 am."

She shrugged her shoulders. "I really need a drink right now."

On their way to his place he could convince her to let him buy her a milkshake instead of a drink. He really thought 10 am was a bit too early for alcohol.

* * *

Sharing an apartment with Natasha was great. He really liked her company and she spent the evenings with him on his couch going through his list of things he had to catch up on. But spending so much time with her also made it harder for him to ignore his feelings for her. He realized months ago that he liked her more than just a friend but she didn't seem to feel the same so he tried his best to bury his feelings for her but it was not easy now that they were practically living together and it sometimes felt to him like they were a couple.

Like right now he had a really hard time not to swoon. It was still early in the morning and he was about to leave for his run when Natasha patted barefoot into the kitchen. She wore sleeping shorts and a thin top and he quickly looked back up at her face when he noticed something poking through her top. He had no right to ogle her like that.

"Oh, morning." She arched her back and yawned adorably. "Didn't see you there."

"Morning, Nat." He had ask her if she wanted to join him on his morning runs but she had told him that she had no intention of letting him run lapse after lapse around her. He would have slowed down for her, okay! She poured herself a glass of water. "Do you want me to get breakfast after my run?"

She rubbed her eyes. God, it shouldn't be allowed for a lethal assassin to be so cute! "Oh, yes! Can you get me a cinnamon bun?"

"Of course."

She walked out the kitchen into the hallway to her purse and got her wallet out. "Nat, you don't have to give me money. I asked you. It's my treat."

She shook her head and shoved a few bills into his hand. "No, you already let me stay here for free. Please let me pay for breakfast."

He still thought that he should pay but he also knew that arguing with her was pointless. He always gave her what she wanted. He always would. "Okay, I'll be back in an hour or so."

Natasha gave him way too much money and he got her a box of those macarons she liked so much. She was showered and had already set the table when he came back.

He handed her a latte. She looked at it. "Oh, I only drink it with almond milk."

"I know and four pumps of vanilla."

She seemed surprised but gave him a small smile and took a sip. "Thank you."

"No, thank you. You paid."

By the time Natasha finished her cinnamon bun he had already ate three croissants. He really cursed the serum sometimes. "I met someone."

Natasha licked the frosting of her fingers. "Really, tell me about her."

"What? No, not like that." He shook his head. He hadn't realized that his sentence could be interpreted like that. "No, Sam Wilson. Met him on my morning run. Seems to be a nice guy."

Natasha looked at the box of macarons and eventually opened it to take one out. "That's great! You should have a friend that has nothing to do with SHIELD."

"I guess so." Nat pushed the box over the table and he chose a chocolate macaron. "Hey, you wanna go to the movies tonight? There's a special screening for Back to the future. Haven't seen that one yet."

"I'm sorry I already got plans tonight. Maybe tomorrow?"

He wanted to ask her about her plans but he had to take a shower and then head to the Pentagon to talk with some people for Fury. He stayed the whole day there and talked with countless generals. It was already evening when he finally got home and ran into Nat in the hallway. She looked amazing in her black dress. Wait, why was she dressed like that? Was she going on a date?

"Hey, Steve!" She greeted him. "I made a casserole. You just have to reheat it. I'll guess I see you tomorrow."

"Um, yes. Have fun!" He yelled after when she was already walking down the stairs. Was she going on a date? Of course she was. She was a beautiful woman and he saw how men and some women looked at her. Hell, he tried his best not to look at her like that too.

He felt like an idiot but he was awake in his bed waiting for her to come home. He couldn't shake the feeling that she was out there on a date with some guy. He knew he had no right to be jealous and she owed him nothing but he was still in his bed listening for sounds that would announce her return. He finally heard the door getting unlocked and her high heels clicking on the floor. Then the sound was gone so she must have gotten out of her shoes. She seemed to be alone, he had no idea how he would have reacted if she brought some guy with her. He didn't hear anything else until his bedroom door suddenly opened. Did something happen to her?

"Nat?"

"Steve, are you still awake?" She poked her head into the room.

"Yes. Are you okay?" He sat up on his bed.

"I don't know." She walked into the room and he could smell gunpowder. She must have fired a gun recently. "Um, can you maybe watch some TV with me?

"Sure." He got out of bed and walked over to her. "Nat, what happened?"

"It's classified." She simply said.

"Were you on a mission?"

She nodded and then left his room to go to the living room. He followed her clueless what to do. She seemed distraught but he knew that she didn't like to talk about her feelings. He sat down beside her on the couch and they watched infomercials in silence.

The next day he tried to find out at SHIELD what her mission was but Sitwell reminded him rudely that he wasn't cleared for that information. He was tempted to go to Fury but the Director was out of town. Great, he would probably never know what had happened last night and why it made Nat act so strange.

* * *

The next days were besides a two day mission in Texas uneventful. Natasha seemed back to normal and her supper had informed her that she could go back to her apartment in two weeks. Steve was happy for her but he was sad that she would leave so soon. He liked having her around, it was probably the closest he would ever get to her.

Natasha came back from her yoga class in the evening when he was in the living room watching Disney's Snow White, one of the few movies he actually knew and were from his time. She had a unreadable expression on her face when she saw what he was watching.

He thought it was a bit weird. "You wanna join me?"

She blinked a few times before she answered him. "Sure." He didn't know why but her smile seemed forced. Did she hate the movie? He personally loved it. He remembered how blown away he was when he had watched it with Bucky and he couldn't stopped talking about the drawings and Buck said that one day he would work for Walt Disney. God, how much he missed his best friend.

Natasha took a seat next to him on the couch and watched the rest of the movie with him. She didn't say anything and kept staring at the screen. It was a bit creepy if he was being honest. They watched Cinderella afterwards and Natasha's whole demeanor changed. He really didn't know what to make of it.

A loud noise coming from Nat's room woke him up in the middle of the night. He grabbed his shield and ran to her room. The lamp had been knocked off the nightstand and Natasha was tossing around in her bed. But she still seemed to be sleeping. Was she having a nightmare? Should he wake her? Then his eyes spotted something that he didn't understand at all. One of her wrists was tied to the headboard with handcuffs. Why would she do that to herself?

He put his shield down and walked over to her. "Natasha, wake up." He shook her shoulders gently. She didn't react and he ripped the handcuffs apart so she wasn't tied to the headboard anymore.

That woke her up. "No! What are you doing!"

"Why were you handcuffed?" He looked at her wrist that had red marks. "You're hurting yourself that way!"

"It's just something I do, okay!" She pulled the blankets over her shoulders like she needed to protect herself from him. That hurt. "Just let me sleep."

"Nat, you had a nightmare. It must have been pretty vivid if you knocked the lamp down."

"I'll buy you a new one."

"Natasha, please talk to me."

"I want to sleep. Good night." She pulled the blanket over her head and he knew she was done talking to him. He just wanted to help her, goddamnit!

He was more than surprised when the door to his bedroom opened and Natasha came in. He didn't know what to say so he stayed silent when she stopped in front of his bed. She walked to the empty side of his bed and slid under the blankets.

"We had to handcuff ourselves to the bed." She whispered into the darkness. "Back in the Red Room. I still do it sometimes." She paused. "Snow White was the movie we watched on repeat to learn to speak English without a Russian accent. It set me back."

"Oh Nat. I'm so sorry I made you watch it!" He wanted to comfort her but he didn't know how. How did you comfort someone who grew up in hell?

"You didn't know. And I... I like watching movies with you." There was another pause. He wondered if she didn't know what to say either. "Last week when I went out... I had to kill another Widow."

"Natasha-"

"It's okay. It had to be done. Can I..." Her voice got really quiet. "Can I sleep here?"

"Of course. You know you can."

"Thank you." She whispered and to his relief she soon fell asleep. He couldn't sleep, he couldn't stop picturing a little Natasha being handcuffed to a bed. She had been through so much and yet she got out on the other side. He never told her but she was the person he admired the most. He let Natasha steal the blankets during the night and pretended to be asleep when she woke up. He didn't think she saw through him because she gave him a brief kiss on the cheek before she got out of bed. That small gesture sent a bolt of electricity through his body and he could still feel her lips hours later.

They never talked about that night again.

* * *

"So do you want Forest morning or-" He read the other label. "Or Ireland's luck. God, who comes up with those fucking names?"

Natasha looked at both paint buckets. "They are the same color, Rogers! They're both green!"

They were at the hardware store picking out colors for her apartment. Natasha wanted to hire someone to paint her place but why waste money when he could help her?

"No, they're not. This one is a lighter green. And this one is more of a seagreen.

"Okay." She didn't look convinced. "Let's go with the Forest morning. I don't want any leprechauns running around in my kitchen. I'm gonna look for copper spray paint. Meet me at the register?" He nodded and she left to find her paint. She wanted him to spray a tree on the wall in her kitchen and he really hoped he could do it. He never worked with spray paint before.

Someone chuckled behind him and Steve turned around. An old man (Steve was sure he was still older than the guy) was standing behind him looking at the different paint buckets. "You and your girlfriend remind me of my wife and I. You two are gonna live together for the first time?"

"She's not my girlfriend." But I want her to be, he added in his mind.

The man was smirking at him like he knew what he was thinking. "Could have fooled me. You should make a move on her, son! Girls like her are rare!"

"Steve!" Natasha was suddenly standing in front of the isle and he hoped she hadn't heard the man. "They have Captain America wallpaper here! Do you want it? My treat!"

He rolled his eyes. "You know I don't."

She laughed and walked away. He heard the man gasped behind him. "Oh my God! You're... you're him!"

He didn't really like it when people recognized him when he wasn't in uniform. "Yeah."

"God, and I gave you dating advice how embarrassing! Forget what I said and... and thank you for your service." The man stumbled out and then quickly left.

He tried his best with the tree and was over the moon when Natasha told him that she loved what he he spray-painted and his heart was racing when she gave him a kiss on his cheek as a thank you. Maybe he should spray trees all over her place so she would give him more kisses.

* * *

Today was the last night Natasha would be staying at his place and he already felt miserable thinking that he would be alone again and didn't get to spend so much time with her anymore. He loved having her around and he was so used to her being around him. He had known he had feelings for her before she stayed at his place but now after the last weeks he knew that he was in love with her. But he also knew that he would never have a chance with her. She was so out of his league.

He got home and a delicious smell greeted him when he opened his front door. Curious, he walked into the kitchen and Natasha spun around and smiled at him. "Hi!"

"Hi!" He greeted back and hoped he wasn't staring at her. She looked so beautiful in her little black dress. "You didn't have to cook, Nat. We could have ordered something."

"Nonsense! I wanted to make you something as a thank you for letting me stay her for so long." She told him to sit at the table and he did as he was told.

Natasha's dinner was incredible and he couldn't stop complementing her cooking skills. She smiled with a light blush on her cheek at him. She was vision like this. He insisted to do the dishes since she already had cooked and she eventually let him. He was just finished when Nat tipped him on the shoulder and he turned around.

She was biting her lower lip and looking up at him through her lashes. "Can I try something?"

"What?"

Her hands were suddenly cupping his face and his breath got caught in his throat. Was she going to do what he thought she was? She must have rising on her tiptoes because she was taller now and then pulled his head down and kissed him. Her lips moved softly and carefully against his like she really was testing something. He had the feeling she was more testing herself than him.

She pulled away and licked her lips. "Did you like that?"

"Yeah." He managed to breathe out. He still couldn't believe she kissed him. What did that mean?

"Me too." She smiled a little smile. "Can we do it again?"

He nodded and she was already pulling his head down again. They kissed longer this time and he really couldn't think of anything that felt better than Natasha's lips.

"Natasha, why did you kiss me?" He needed to know. Was he not the only with feelings?

"Because I like you." She looked at her hands and he never seen her like this before. She almost seemed shy. "And I wanted to kiss you. Um, for some time actually."

He tilted her head up so she would look at him. "I like you, too." That earned him a smile. Well, it was more than liking, he loved her but he didn't want to overwhelm her. "And I wanted to kiss you for some time now as well."

Her smile grew wider and she pulled his head down to kiss him again. This time she licked over the seam of his lips and he happily opened them to let her tongue in. They kissed until they were both out of breath. "Why now?" He asked her with his forehead rested against hers.

"I didn't want to make things weird between us if you weren't interested in me like that. With me staying here." She whispered and rubbed her small hands over his chest.

She probably had a point and he was just glad that she kissed him. He was sure that he would have never found the courage to ask her out. He wrapped his arms around her waist to press her closer to him. Their kisses got deeper and more heated and he couldn't stop a moan leaving his mouth when she pressed herself against his growing arousal.

"Bedroom?" He asked hoping he wasn't reading the moment wrong.

"Yes." She jumped up to wrap her legs around his waist and he carried her to his bedroom to make sure that her last night here would be a memorable one.

* * *

 _THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR REVIEWS!_


	20. Getaway

_**For LoneWolfOneill**_

 _Tony checks in on Steve and Natasha who are supposed to be on a mission but what he'll find out will traumatize his innocent eyes forever._

* * *

Tony was bored. He technically had enough to do but there was no one currently around to annoy. His ladylove was on a business trip in Tokyo and Rhodey back at the Pentagon. Barton was posing as a scarecrow or whatever people did who had a farm (like really who had seen that one coming?) and Thor was somewhere in space. That left Spangles and Red but the two left for a mission three days ago and there was no word from them. Maybe he should put the suit on and help them? Natasha had said something about a rebel group in South America when he asked them about the assignment while Cap only stuttered something about the mission being classified. Weird.

"JARVIS buddy, hack into SHIELD and find me the intel about Cap and Red's mission."

"Yes, sir."

Minutes passed and JARVIS found nothing. Weird, there was usually nothing that JARVIS wouldn't find. "Can you trace the quinjet they took?"

"Last location was over the Indian Ocean, sir. Stealth mode must have been activated after that."

Last time he checked the Indian Ocean wasn't anywhere near South America. What was going on? Did Fury send them on some super secret mission? And why did Steve blush when he asked them where they were going. Were they in trouble? Did they need his help? He told JARVIS to call Fury who told him to not bother him and that he had no idea where they were and no they were not on a job for him and then he chuckled and hung up. He had no idea what to make of it. Sure, Fury could lie to him but Tony thought he had been telling the truth. Were they looking for Barnes? No, they would have taken Wilson with them and the guy was in DC (Tony hacked his phone to check).

Tony was not bored anymore. He was worried about his friends.

* * *

"Steve?" Natasha singsonged and pressed a kiss on his back. "I know you're awake!"

He chuckled and turned around to pull his girlfriend on his chest. "Morning, doll."

He felt her smile against his skin. "Morning, Steve."

He could hear the ocean through the open windows and had to thank Natasha again for deciding that they needed a getaway and came up with the fake mission so they could enjoy a week on a private island from someone who owed Nat a favor. He wanted to never leave again. This was truly paradise and despite what Nat had claimed a year ago she looked incredible in a bikini and it really taken all of his willpower to not drag her back to the house to make love to her. They tried to make love on the beach yesterday but he swore that one turtle was watching them and he got self-conscious and couldn't perform. Nat just laughed at him and let him drag her back to the house where no turtles were watching.

He drew circles on her naked back. "What do you say about breakfast in bed and then we'll make love again and then go to the beach?"

"Still convinced the turtle was watching?" She looked up at him clearly amused.

"I know what I saw, Nat!" He huffed out. Did she still not believe him? He gave her beautiful bottom a light squeeze before he got out of bed to make breakfast for them.

Natasha rolled onto her back and watched him put underwear on. "You don't have to get dressed for me, handsome." She licked her lips. "It's not like you're gonna wear it long. Or are you scared the turtles will ogle you?"

He rolled his eyes at her. "No, but I also don't want hot grease on my..." He knew he was blushing. "You know what."

She smirked. "It's cute that you still get flustered after all the things we did."

He stuck his tongue out and walked to the kitchen. He couldn't stop smiling, he was so happy. Natasha was his girl and they were on vacation. Life was perfect.

* * *

"I circled their location to a radius from 30 miles. There seem to be several islands in the area." Tony was told by JARVIS. He checked the map on the screen in the quinjet. He flew to the Indian Ocean because he needed to make sure that Steve and Natasha were okay. Pepper would kill him if Natasha was in danger and he didn't help her. He looked at the map again. Those islands could be the perfect hiding spot for bad guys.

"Okay, I'll check the area with the suit."

JARVIS landed the jet in Bali and Tony took off to find Cap and Widow. He checked the first islands in the radius but no trace that they had been here. Wow, those islands were really beautiful. Maybe he should buy one for him and Peps.

According to JARVIS he had searched half of the islands when he spotted an island that seemed to be some kind of resort. Probably belonged to a rich guy like him. He could see two people on the beach, looked like a man and a woman. The guy was lifting up the girl and twirled her around. Cute. Tony was glad that he included stealth mood to his suit and the two lovebirds wouldn't notice that Iron Man was watching them. They might thought he was a perv.

The woman laid down on a beach chair and pulled the man on top of her. Wait, a minute! He was now close enough to see the hair color of the woman. He thought she was a brunette but now he could see that she had red hair. Was that...? No! That's not possible. The dude had blond hair and a really defined back. No, that wasn't... No, that could not... That would mean that they...

He flew closer and the man was kissing the woman and throwing her bikini top over his shoulders. He moved his head to kiss her neck and Tony could now clearly see the woman's face. It was Natasha! And that meant that the guy kissing her neck and sliding one hand between her legs was Capiscle. Oh God, no! No! He did not need to see Starspangle banging Mother Russia.

"OH MY EYES!" He yelled.

Steve turned around and looked frantically around shielding Natasha with his body. Right, he was still in stealth mode and they couldn't see him.

"Maybe it's your turtle!" Natasha suddenly had a gun in her hand. "Show yourself!"

"Relax, Red!" He said and turned stealth mode off. "It's just me."

She lowered her gun and Steve grabbed a towel to cover her naked upper body. How long were these two a thing anyway? And also Captain America was not a virgin?!

"What are you doing here?" Natasha snarled and wrapped the towel around her. Steve was blushing and trying to hide the tent in his shorts. Really, Tony's innocent eyes didn't have to see this whole scene. He almost felt like he caught his parents in the act. God, he needed to bleach his eyes to forget the whole thing.

"What am I doing here?" He landed on the beach and walked closer to them. "What are you doing here? What about the mission? Is your mission to bang Captain America?"

"Tony!" Steve found his words again. "Don't talk to her like that."

"What? It was a serious question! I search the whole fucking Indian Ocean for you thinking you two are in trouble because no one knew about the nature of your mission and then I find Captain America feeling up Black Widow!"

"I'm sorry we lied, Tony." Steve said and looked a bit guilty. "We just wanted to have some time alone."

"How long is this-" He pointed between Cap and Natasha. "How long is this even going on? And who knows about this?"

"Six months and only Sam knows."

"Six months?!" They had been together or were just banging for half a year?!

Natasha seemed annoyed." Can you leave now? We were in the middle of something!"

Tony grimaced, he had seen enough for that something. Yikes! "I hope you know that I will tell everyone about this!"

She shrugged her shoulders. "Do that. We were gonna tell you eventually about us."

Steve smiled at that and Tony figured that Nat was the one who wanted to keep their thing between them. He told them to have fun but not too much fun which made Steve blush and took off.

Wait a minute! Sam bet that Spangles and Red would get together within the year. He said that two months ago when he had already known that they were at least banging. That fucker!

* * *

Steve carried Natasha over the threshold into the tower. She had said that it was just an old cheesy tradition but he could see on her face that she liked it that he had insisted. He thought it was important that he carried his wife over the threshold. Wife, Natasha was now his wife. They hadn't planned the whole thing or even talked about marriage but then Natasha asked him if he wanted to get married and they stopped on their way back to the States in France at a little catholic church that also owed Natasha for some reason a favor and they got married in a beautiful small chapel. They bought wedding rings in Paris and were now back in New York. Some might thought it was bit fast after only six month of dating but he knew that he would always love her.

"Welcome home, _Mrs. Rogers_." He kissed her temple. He had tears in eyes when she told him that she wanted to change her name to let go of her past and to embrace their future. He would have never asked her to change her name.

She chuckled lightly and smiled at him. "Are you gonna carry me all the way to your floor, _hubby?"_

"You know I will!"

She laughed and he almost dropped her when he turned around the corner and the whole team minus Thor was waiting for them. There was no way they could know about the wedding.

Tony was carrying a cake in his hands. C _ongrats on the sex_ was written in on it. He rolled his eyes at him.

"Told you I would-" Tony raised an eyebrow. "Why are you carrying Red? Did your sex marathon break her?"

He wanted to say something but Pepper was faster. "Honey!" She chided and slapped his arm. Then she looked at Nat's left hand and smiled. She must have spotted the thin wedding band on her finger. He wanted to buy her a bigger ring with diamonds but she insisted on the simple white gold one.

"Oh my God!" Clint shrieked. "I can't believe I wasn't invited! Lila is gonna kill you!"

Tony looked confused. "You wanted to be invited to their sex marathon? You're married, dude! And what does your child have to do with this?"

Clint rolled his eyes at Stark. "It's good we don't keep you for your eyesight!" He walked over to them and Steve let Natasha down. "Congratulations you two. I hope you'll let Laura throw a party for you or we will never talk to either of you again."

"I second that!" Pepper said and came over to give them a hug.

Sam seemed to have connect the dots. "Oh that's so awesome! I'm so happy for you!"

"Thanks, Sam."

"It was quite spontaneous!" Natasha added.

"Can someone tell me what's going on?" Tony asked. "And why are you two not mad at the cake? I only ordered it to annoy you!"

"They got married." Pepper explained and wanted to know everything about the wedding.

"They're WHAT?" Tony shrieked and the look on his face was priceless.

* * *

 _I hope you guys like the last one shot since it got no feedback. It was the first Romanogers one shot I ever wrote and I forgot about it until I found it on my laptop._


	21. These little gifts (RATED M)

_Thank you SO MUCH for your reviews!_

 ** _For Rembrandtdt. Sorry you had to wait so long for your one shot. I hope you like it!_**

 _Steve keeps giving Natasha these little gifts and she doesn't get why. (RATED M!)_

 _Just imagine Steve with his Infinity War look because I developed an unhealthy obsession with it. This one shot is rated M, if that isn't your cup of tea wait for the next one. It won't have any smut in it._

* * *

Natasha moved into the Tower six months after the fall of SHIELD. Tony invited her immediately after DC to stay at his now their Tower but she still had to deal with her past catching up to her after she dumped everything on the internet. And she had hesitated to live with others. Tony, Bruce and Clint were all living there and she knew that Tony also invited Steve and Thor but one was looking for his brainwashed best friend and the other one was romancing Dr. Foster in London.

As it turned out living with the others wasn't as bad as she thought it would be since everyone got their own floor and she could stay there if she wasn't in the mood for company. She liked her floor, Pepper really had a knack for interior design.

She just got back from a mission for Fury and wanted to steal one of Clint's cold brewed coffee drinks from the fridge on the common floor to wake herself up when she spotted a tall man with blond brownish hair to his ears who had his back to her. Was he an intruder? Or was he a guest? She had been gone for two weeks, a lot could have happened in that time. She didn't think an intruder would get past by JARVIS.

She placed her hand on her gun ready to pull it out of her holster if he was hostile. "Hi?"

The man turned around and her eyes almost fell out of their sockets. That wasn't just some man, it was Steve. Steve with longer hair and a beard! And woah, he looked really good. Like really, really good! Okay Romanoff, get it together! Steve smiled brightly at her and came towards her. The last time she had seen him was when she gave him the file on his buddy Barnes. Had that really been eight months ago? He wrapped his arms around her and lifted her off the ground. She was surprised by this greeting but she discovered that Steve's strong arms around her felt really nice. He set her down and was still smiling at her. Had he always been so attractive? Yes, Natasha and you were always aware of that, she reminded herself.

"It's so good to see you, Nat!"

"You too." She really meant it. She had enjoyed their time in Washington and she did miss him sometimes in the last months. She always found things she wanted to show him because she knew he would like them.

"I was about to make me something to eat. You want some?"

She nodded because she realized that she hadn't eaten in over 18 hours. "Did you find Barnes?"

His smile vanished a bit. "No. I'm starting to think that he doesn't want to be found. Maybe he'll come to me in the end."

"I'm sure he won't miss the giant tower with the huge A on it." She was proud when Steve laughed at her joke. He made wraps for them and she watched with appreciation how his back muscles were moving under his tight shirt. Did he buy the size on purpose or was he really not aware how they showed off his body?

He handed her the plate with a smile. "I'm really digging your new look, Rogers."

His cheeks turned slightly pinked and she was pleased that she still had that affect on him. She just loved to see him flustered. "Thanks. I think I'll keep it for some time. Makes me kinda incognito."

"You should. The girls are gonna love it, believe me."

Something flickered in his eyes. "You think?"

"Yeah."

He seemed pleased with that and she didn't know why. Did he call Sharon?

* * *

She just finished her 10k on the treadmill and was heading to her floor when she ran into Steve in the elevator. He greeted her with a smile that almost blinded her.

"Hey."

"Hi."

"Good thing I run into you." He handed her something in his open palm. "I forgot to give this to you yesterday. I hope you like it."

She took the round wood box from his hand and opened it. It was a music box with a ballerina. The finale andante of Swan Lake filled the elevator. It was so beautiful.

"Steve." She whispered. "I can't accept this."

He smiled at her. "Of course you can. I found it in Prague and had to think of you. Don't worry it didn't cost much. Do you like it?"

She didn't know why but she had to fight back tears. It was such a thoughtful gift and it was so Steve to get it for her. "I love it. Thank you."

"I'm glad you do." The elevator stopped on the floor with Tony's lab and he got out. "I'll see you."

"Yeah." Once the elevator doors were closed she didn't have to hide her dopey grin anymore. She pressed the box against her chest and told JARIVS to delete the footage of what just happened. She didn't need anyone to see how touched she was. And then she grinned again because Steve had clearly thought about her during his trip around the world.

Natasha felt the need to thank Steve for the music box but she didn't know how. But she got an idea when she saw the notification that the MoMa had an exhibition with artists she was sure Steve would like.

She found Steve with Clint on his floor watching Die Hard. "Hi Nat!" Steve beamed at her and she was shocked when she noticed something flutter in her chest. Was she having heart problems?

"Hey guys." She plopped down on an arm chair while Clint shushed her. His obsession with Die Hard was really annoying. Pretty much everything they had done for SHIELD was more impressive than that whole franchise combined. She threw a pillow at Clint and he was so into the movie that he didn't catch it.

She rolled her eyes and Steve smiled at her. She handed him the flyer she had printed out for him. "You wanna go?"

"With you?"

"Um, yes. If you want my company. I'm not really educated in art though. Just enough to fool targets."

"I just want your company." Steve said and Natasha was confused when Clint looked from the screen to her with a smug grin. What was he grinning about? Steve looked at the flyer again. "You wanna leave now?"

"Sure."

Steve left the room to change his clothes. Clint was watching the movie and still had a grin on his face.

"If you wanna say something, say it." She was annoyed.

His grin grew wider. "Nothing, nothing. You'll figure it out."

She wanted to ask him what the fuck he was talking about but Steve came back in jeans, shirt and a black leather jacket. With that outfit and his new facial look and hairstyle he looked really hot. She already knew that he would turn a lot of heads at the museum. She suddenly wondered how his beard would feel against her skin and if he would like it if she tugged on his now longer hair. God, what was wrong with her? She couldn't think about him like that!

"Are you okay, Nat?" Steve asked with a worried look.

"Yes, of course." She got up from the chair. "Let's go." She didn't need to look at him to know that Clint was grinning again.

* * *

A splinter group of HYDRA thought they could overthrow the government and the Avengers were needed in DC to stop them. They were easily dealt with and Natasha didn't see why they had to assemble. The FBI could have done it on their own. The only thing that occurred was an explosion that threw her against a SWAT truck and her back hurt from the impact. Thankfully Tony had his own masseur at the Tower who helped ease the pain but it still hurt a little.

She was back on her floor when she noticed a little basket in front of her door. She looked inside and found bath bombs, salts and heat plasters for her back. She already had a suspicion who left her the basket and when she read the card her suspicion was confirmed.

I'm sorry you had to take the hit.

I hope this will help with your back.

Steve

She smiled at his thoughtfulness and took the basket inside to try out the bath bombs in her whirlpool. This and the heat plaster really helped and she caught herself wishing Steve would put it on her naked back. Really, what was going on with her? Why did she have such thoughts about a team member? She put on some Netflix to stop thinking these inappropriate thoughts about her friend but sent him a text to thank him for the gift.

Fury needed her again to handle something in Europe and when she got back from her mission Tony told her that Steve and Sam left for Russia to check out a potential lead on Barnes. She was a bit disappointed that Steve wasn't here but she hoped for him that he would find something on Barnes.

Steve got back three days later when she had breakfast with Tony, Bruce and Clint on the terrace of the tower. He didn't look like the mission was a success and she wanted to go to him and hug him but the fact that they weren't alone stopped her.

"No luck?" Bruce asked softly when Steve joined them at the table.

"No." Steve stared into the distance and then looked at her. "I got something for you."

"Huh?" She almost choked on her coffee and ignored the look Clint threw her way.

He pulled a tin can out of his duffel bag and placed it next to her pancakes. "You always complain that the tea here is garbage. I got you some from Russia."

She looked at the tin can and then at him and a warmth spread through her body she never felt before. She never openly complained about the tea here and always drank the tea Bruce offered her but Steve still noticed that she didn't really like it. "Thank you." She smiled at him and opened the box to look inside. Her smile grew wider. "That's my favorite kind."

"Your smile made the trip worth it." Steve said and looked like he surprised himself for saying it.

She couldn't look at Steve and the fondness in his eyes anymore and averted her gaze to the others. Clint was grinning again, Tony's eyes wandered between her and Steve like he was trying to make sense of something, and Bruce was just smiling softly at them.

She thanked Steve again and continued eating her breakfast. Why did Steve keep giving her gifts? And why did she like it so much?

* * *

Coulson asked her and Clint to help track down Ward who was apparently HYDRA and that's why she and Clint were currently sitting on a stake out in an old Ford in Nebraska (of all fucking places!).

She used the time while there was no movement to think about stuff she could gift to Steve. Maybe new pencils for him to draw? She had to google which one were the best ones.

"Is that your special Russian tea?" Clint asked with a grin and pointed at her Starbucks cup.

She rolled her eyes. "You know it isn't, jerk."

"So what other gifts did you get from Steve?"

"Huh?"

"I know about the tea and I saw the music box in your bedroom. And I know you didn't buy that yourself and I didn't give it to you so that only leaves Steve."

"Maybe Tony gave it to me." She bit into her bagel.

Clint scoffed. "Oh please. He would probably give you lingerie that matches your Natalie Rushman cover." He took a sip from his coffee. "So what else did you get from Steve?"

She got the music box, the basket with stuff for her back, the tea and he gave her a book yesterday he was sure she would like. She couldn't wait to get back to the Tower to read it.

"Nothing." She lied.

"You know that I can tell when you're lying?"

"Really? You seemed to buy it when I told you that I like your new haircut."

Clint pressed a hand on his chest. "How cruel of you! You already figured out why Cap keeps giving you gifts?"

What was the point in keep pretending she didn't get gifts from Steve. She shrugged her shoulders. "He's a nice guy. He's Captain America for god's sake."

"And yet me and the others don't get personal gifts. Come on, you can figure this one out. Why does a guy give a girl nice things?" He sipped on his coffee.

She could only think of one reason why a man would do that. "Steve wants to fuck me?"

Clint spit the coffee out and it splashed against the windshield. She was so not gonna clean that. "What? Jesus, Nat! That's what your mind goes immediately to?" Clint wiped the coffee of the shield with the sleeve of his jacket. Yikes, she really didn't now what Morse saw in Clint that made her wanna marry him. But she did see why Bobbi divorced him. "This is Steve we're talking about. I mean I'm sure he hopes to um fuck you in the future but I think he's trying to court you."

"What?"

"You haven't noticed that Cap's sweet on you? Don't you see the way he looks at you? He looks at you like you hung the moon." Clint gulped down the rest of his coffee. "It's cute."

She could only stare at her best friend. Was he right? Did Steve _like_ her? Was that the reason she got gifts from him and the others didn't?

She almost thanked Ward for choosing that moment to arrive at the warehouse but she didn't because he was a Nazi but she was already looking forward to beat the crap out of him.

* * *

She didn't have much time to think about Steve and his possible feelings for her because two hours after she and Clint got back to the Tower after dropping off Ward at the Playground James Buchanan Barnes showed up the tower and surrendered.

Steve almost knocked down Tony on his to the elevators when JARIVS announced his best friend's arrival. She didn't know why but she ran after him and managed to jump into the elevator before the doors closed. Was Barnes himself or the Winter Soldier? She checked her thigh holsters to make sure that she could protect Steve if Barnes turned out to be hostile.

"I can't believe he's here." Steve whispered and she saw that his hands were shaking.

The need to comfort him was overwhelming and she took his hands into her own. Steve looked surprised but then he smiled at their hands. The elevator doors opened with a ping and she let go of his hands only to find out that she missed the feel of his skin against her own. Did s _he_ possibly have feelings for Steve?

Barnes was standing in the entrance area with worn out clothes and dark circles under his eyes. He looked miserable, she could hardly believe in that moment that this was the guy who put two bullets in her. Steve got out of the elevator and she put her hands on her guns ready to draw them to protect Steve. Her mind flashed back to the moment when she found Steve half dead on the shore of the Potomac River, she knew that she would kill Barnes if he ever did that to Steve again.

"Buck?"

"You got a beard now." Barnes noticed and apparently that was enough for Steve who ran to him and gave him a bone crushing hug. He seemed to be himself and she let go of her Glocks.

Steve let go of Barnes and turned around to her with a bright smile on his face. She couldn't help but smile back, his happiness was infectious. "Natasha, this is my best friend Bucky."

Barnes gave her a small and shy smile and she had a problem to believe the stories Steve told her about how charming Bucky was with the ladies but then again that was before HYDRA. She waved at him because she didn't know if he wanted her to touch him. "Hi, I'm Natasha Romanoff."

"You were with Steve in DC." His eyes widened in horror. "I shot you!"

"It's okay. I know that wasn't you."

"I'm sorry." He said and then turned to Steve. "I'm sorry I shot your girl."

Steve's cheeks got really red and she felt her own getting warm. "She's not...She's just my friend."

Barnes didn't look completely convinced. "Okay. I'm still very sorry for hurting you, Miss Romanoff!"

"Please call me Natasha."

Steve spent from now on a lot of time with Bucky to get him settled in and she didn't get more gifts from him. Not that she wanted more presents from him. She just missed having him around but she was definitely not jealous that Steve was always with Bucky. No, she totally she wasn't!

* * *

She could count on one hand the times she saw Steve in the next weeks. He was busy with getting Bucky's name cleared and finding the right people to help him with the things HYDRA did to him. She knew that Sam and Tony had spent some time with Bucky and both said that he made great progress. Natasha herself hadn't really talked to Bucky yet but she figured that he would stay at the Tower for good so there would be enough time to get to know him.

The weather was nice and she decided to read her new book on the terrace of the tower and maybe get a light tan. She really was as white as a ghost. She stopped at the door, Steve was on one of the lounge chairs with a sketchbook on his lap drawing something. He was deeply concentrated on whatever he was drawing. She noticed with pleasure that he used the pencils she dropped off at his doorstep a week ago.

She stepped on the terrace. "Hi, Steve."

He looked up and his lips curved into a smile. She really hoped he would never shave off the beard or cut his hair short again. She really liked this look on him. It made him look more like Steve Rogers and not Captain America. "Hey, Nat! I feel like I haven't seen you in ages. Thank you for the pencils."

"I'm glad I picked the right ones. I didn't know there were so many different kinds." She patted to a lounge chair and sat down. Steve's eyes traveled over her bare legs ( she put on jeans short and a tube top so more skin was exposed to the sun) and seemed to like what he saw. He blushed lightly when he saw that she caught him looking and quickly looked away. She hid her smirk. She had come to realize over the last weeks and since her talk with Clint that she possibly had feelings for Steve and it was nice that he seemed to be at least attracted to her.

"Where's Barnes?" Steve was usually where Bucky was and she didn't see him anywhere. Unless he was hiding behind those palm trees but she highly doubted that.

"In Langley. CIA wants to talk with him about HYDRA." He closed his sketchbook. "You wanna do something together?"

"Why? Because your pal has no time for you?" She sounded more bitter than she intended. She didn't want him to know that she was bothered by that.

He looked guilty. "I'm sorry I wasn't around. Bucky needed me but I still should have found time for you. I'm sorry, Nat."

"It's okay. I get it. Don't worry!" She opened her book where her bookmark was. "Let's just enjoy the sun for now, okay?"

He gave her a small smile and continued to work on his drawing. The silence between them was comfortable and she wondered what Steve was drawing. She couldn't see it from where she was sitting.

A rain drop fell on the page she was currently reading and she looked up at the sky. Dark clouds were about to cover the sun and then suddenly it was pouring. She jumped up and ran inside. Steve was right behind her but they had both not been fast enough and were soaked.

They looked at each other and both burst out in laughter. Wet hair was falling into her face and Steve brushed it out of her face. A shiver went down her spine when his fingers touched her skin. He looked like he felt it too. "We should get dry." She said and Steve nodded. "We can go to my floor." He nodded again and followed her to her apartment. She didn't know why she said it and she knew that Steve was well aware that she had no dry clothes for him on her floor that he could change into.

She got to the lining closet and threw a towel at Steve that he used to dry off his wet hair and beard. His wet shirt clung to his body and she could see every well defined muscle underneath it. She bit her lip and tried to calm herself. She wondered if Steve had similar thoughts when he looked at her. She used her towel to wring out the water in her hair and when she looked up Steve was watching her every move. She could have sworn that he looked at her with hunger in his eyes.

"Natasha." He breathed out and something snapped in her and she threw the towel out of her hands and ran to him. She cupped his face and crashed their lips together. Steve's hands grabbed her waist and he pulled her against him. He kissed her with desperation and a need like he was drowning in her and her knees almost gave away. This was nothing like the kiss on the escalator to throw Rumlow off. He sucked and nibbled on her lips and his hands were everywhere. She walked backwards to her bedroom and Steve followed her willingly not breaking their kiss. Her kneecaps hit her bed and she fell on it pulling Steve with her.

He pressed kisses all over her face. "You're so beautiful." His lips moved back to her mouth and his hands caressed her naked waist. She was so glad she decided to wear a tube top today so she could feel his hands on her body. "So so beautiful." He kissed her lips. "So perfect." He kissed the corner of her mouth. "I think about you all the time." His lips brushed against her jaw. "Everything you do amazes me." He placed wet kisses on her neck and her breath hitched. "You are amazing, you know that?" He sucked on her pulse point and she moaned. His lips and his beard felt so good against her skin. He kissed her collarbone and then moved to the top of her breasts. She grabbed the long strains of his hair and he sighed against her skin. So he liked that, good to know.

She pulled his head up by his hair and the look in his eyes almost knocked the air out of her lungs. He looked at her with hunger and wanton but she could also see something else in them. Something she never thought she would deserve. Especially from someone as good and kind as him. She saw something she always thought was just for children.

He pecked her lips and she wanted to complain that it wasn't enough and then he pressed his lips on hers again and licked his way into her mouth. Her hands slid under his shirt and she roamed her hands over his back and she could feel his muscle react to her touch. He sucked on her tongue which made her press her hips up and she could feel his hard length through their pants. Steve growled and she loved that sound. She pushed her hips up again to feel some friction against her throbbing cunt. She couldn't remember a time where she wanted someone as much as she wanted Steve. He pressed his hips against her and she wrapped her legs around his hips so he had better access.

"Should we stop?" He asked against her lips. "Natasha sweetheart, look at me."

She opened her eyes. "You've done this before."

He grinned and pecked her lips. "You sound so surprised about that."

"Well, there had been rumors."

He pressed his hips down and she moaned. "Sorry to disappoint, ma'am."

She rolled her eyes and laughed at him. "I wouldn't call it that."

He smirked and caressed her cheek. "Do you want to stop? Tell me if this is too fast for you."

"Is this...is this a one time thing?" She hoped he wanted more than just to fuck her once or maybe more than once. There also had been rumors about his stamina.

"I don't want it to be a one time thing. I wanna take you out." He gave her a boyish smile. "I was hoping you would teach me how to dance. "

"We'll do all those things." She kissed him. "Now we have to get rid of our clothes."

He laughed but pressed her down into the mattress when she tried to flip them. "I was hoping you want to be my girl."

His eyes were so soft that she almost melted. "Is that why you gave me all those gifts?"

"Yeah, but I also wanted you to have nice things. No one give them to you but you deserve them."

She probably shouldn't cry when she wanted Steve to rip her clothes off.

"So you wanna be my girl?"

Not trusting her voice right now she touched his cheek and nodded. He rewarded her with the most beautiful smile she had ever seen and they kissed softly like they hadn't been making out furiously a few minutes ago. Their kisses grew more heated and she impatiently tugged on the hem of his shirt and Steve leaned back on his knees to pull it over his head and she used the moment to get rid of her top and bra.

His fingertips brushed over her breasts and she shivered. "Beautiful. So beautiful."

He leaned back over her and kissed his way from her mouth to her tits. She arched her back off the bed when he bit lightly on her nipple while his hand cupped her other breast. She was already on fire and they barely started. He circled her nipple with his tongue and then closed his mouth around it to suck. Her hands went to his hair and she tugged on it again causing Steve to moan around her breast. He let it go with a wet plop and then put his attention to the other one. He placed wet kisses on her belly and stopped when he reached her waistline of her jeans short.

He looked up at her and she nodded eagerly. She didn't care if she seemed desperate, she really needed Steve to touch her between her legs or she would combust. She was sure that she was soaking through her underwear. Steve plopped her button open and she lifted her legs so he could get her shorts off of her. He kissed her above her knee and his lips wandered up her inner thigh. God, she was already losing her mind and he hadn't even so much as touched her cunt. He groaned because he probably saw that her blue panties had a dark and wet spot between her legs.

"Oh God, Nat!" He growled and before she could say anything he kissed her over her panties. She almost didn't recognize the sound she made as her own voice and pressed her cunt into his face. His tongue darted out and outlined her folds over the fabric.

"Steve!" She whined and her hands moved to her breast.

He looked up and his eyes got even more darker when he saw that she was playing with herself. "I know, doll." He tugged on the waistline of her panties. "Were these expensive?"

"What?" He tugged on them again. "I don't think so."

"Good." Then he ripped them apart and threw them over his shoulder. Holy fuck! She wanted to come up with a witty retort but she could only moan when he buried his face between her legs. The combination of his mouth and the light scratch of his beard drove her wild. She had to hand it to Steve, he really knew how to eat out a girl and by the sounds he made he really enjoyed it.

"Oh fuck! Don't stop!"

He licked over her folds, circled her clit with his tongue and then pushed a finger slowly into her. He rubbed on her inner walls until her loud moan told him he found her sweet spot. He added another finger and thrust them in and out of her and sucked on her clit hard. She was already so wound up that when he rubbed her g-spot again she saw stars and came with his name on her lips. Steve kept moving his fingers in and out of her and kept licking at her clit and another orgasm washed over her soon after she came down from the first one.

"Oh God!" She groaned when she felt Steve licking her clean. He looked up at her with a boyish grin and he pressed a kiss on her inner thigh. He wiped his face on her sheets and then crawled back up to her. He kissed her deeply and she could taste herself.

"Good?" He didn't sound smug (well maybe a little bit) but more like he wanted to make sure she had liked it.

"More than good!" Her voice was already hoarse from all her moaning and screaming. "It was fucking fantastic."

He gave her a dopey grin and kissed the tip of her nose. "Good. I enjoyed it, too. You taste amazing."

A thought crossed her mind and she had to laugh.

"What's so funny?"

"I can't believe Captain America just went down on me and made me come two times."

He pinched her waist. "I would prefer it if you'd call me Steve in the bedroom. And you're welcome!"

She flipped them and smiled down at him. "Oh yes. Thank you very much for that." She got off of him to get him out of his jeans. There was a giant bulge in his boxer briefs and she licked her lips in anticipation. She palmed him through his underwear and he closed his eyes and groaned. She pulled his boxers down and her mouth watered at the sight before her. He definitely had the most gorgeous cock she had ever laid eyes on. She couldn't wait to know how it would feel inside her.

She brushed her fingertip over his length and Steve shivered under her touch. "Feels so good, Nat."

"What do you want?" She wrapped her hand around him and she could feel him pulsing under her skin. She already knew that his veins would rub against every right spot inside her.

"Wanna be inside you." He rasped out and bit his lip when she started to stroke him. God, he looked beautiful like this.

"Mouth or cunt?"

"Jesus, Nat!" Steve moaned and looked at her through hooded eyes. "Wanna come with you."

She really wanted to hear him say cunt but she figured there was still time for that. God, all the things they could try! "You'll have my mouth later." She promised and smirked when he groaned. She told him to sit up and lean against the headboard and he did.

His hands moved to her waist when she straddled him and slid her cunt over his length. They both moaned and she rocked her hips a few times to coat him with her wetness.

"Natasha." He breathed out and kissed her.

"I know. Me too!" She moaned and then lined him up at her entrance and sank slowly down on him. Oh God, the feeling of him inside her was incredible. He stretched her and filled her completely and perfectly. She tried to keep her eyes open to watch Steve's face. He bit his lips and his pupils were so wide blown that the blue was almost gone. His hands dug hard into her waist but it didn't hurt, it felt amazing.

"Nat, you..." He struggled to find his words. "It feels..."

"I know, I know." She rolled her hips and they both gasped. She never felt anything like this before. She pulled on his hair to kiss him. They kept kissing while she moved her hips and Steve's hands on her waist helped her find a rhythm. She tried to move slowly to drag this out as long as possible but she could feel that Steve was as desperate as she was and he was two orgasms behind.

He started to thrust up to her and it was both too much and not enough. The way he felt and moved inside her was out of this world. He moved his head to her breasts to kiss and suck on them. He was throbbing inside of her and she knew that he was close but probably waiting for her. Her hands traveled between her legs and she started to pinch and rub on her clit. She used her other hand to pull Steve's head up because she wanted to kiss him again. His thrusts grew harder and she slammed her hips down to meet him.

"So close." He whimpered into her mouth.

"Yes."

Steve's hand pushed her own out of the way and he pressed down hard on her clit matching a hard thrust. White, hot pleasure was running through her veins and she barely noticed how Steve spilled into her following her over the edge. She came down breathing hard from her high and had to rest her head on Steve's shoulder.

That had to be the best sex of her life.

She lifted her head and Steve was smiling at her. She brushed the hair that fell into his face behind his ear and kissed his nose. He helped her move up so he could slip out of her. They both moaned at the loss and laid down on the bed again facing each other on their sides.

"Wow!" Steve's hand stroked up and down her arm.

She grinned at him. "Yeah."

They didn't leave her bedroom the whole afternoon and she was already impressed with his stamina and his determination to make her come as often as possible. Steve Rogers really knew how to treat a lady.

They did manage to separate after hours of lovemaking (she really had no other word to describe it) to get ready for their first date. Steve played the Captain America card and got them a table at a rooftop restaurant with view over the Hudson. The food was great but the company was so much better. The rain was gone and it was a warm summer night so they walked through Central Park back to the Tower.

"I think I'm falling in love with you." She admitted when Steve walked her to her door.

He cupped her face and kissed her. "I think I already have."


	22. Jealousy, turning saints into the sea

_Natasha and Bucky seem to get along very well and Steve's not jealous. Not at all! And why do people keep telling him he's an idiot?_

* * *

Steve was finally done talking to the Prime Minister of Japan and wanted to eat something before he would go to bed. The phone call took longer than expected since Steve had to convince the Prime Minister that Tony would never again try to reenact Godzilla with the Hulk and that took a few hours because the man was understandably pretty mad. He walked through the private building of the Avengers facility to get to the common kitchen since he was sure that neither he or Buck remembered to go grocery shopping and their fridge was empty. It was already way past midnight and he was sure that everyone was already asleep and he would run into no one because after that phone call he was in no mood to talk.

He made himself a few sandwiches and stole two of Sam's chocolate bars and was on his way to the apartment he shared with Buck when he heard noises coming from the living room in the common area. He wanted to check quickly if everything was okay and then eat his snack in bed. The door was open and he saw Bucky sitting on one of the couches watching some horror movie. His best friend had trouble sleeping and nightmares and Steve walked in to make sure if he needed him. He almost dropped his plate with the sandwiches on when he saw that Bucky wasn't alone. He was with _her._ He hadn't see her before because she was laying down on the couch and the back of the sofa had been covering her from where he had been standing. Finding Natasha here wasn't that shocking, she had insomnia like pretty much everyone who lived here but what shocked him was that she had her feet in Bucky's lap and he was massaging them.

"Hey punk." Bucky turned his head still kneading Nat's pretty foot. "Wanna join us? We're watching Scream."

Natasha turned her head and gave him a small smile. "How did it go with Prime Minister Abe?"

He did his best to not stare at her feet in his best friend's lap. He never had have the chance to massage them. "Situation is handled."

"That's good." She nodded and turned her head back to the screen.

"Natalia says her feet hurt from wearing high heels and I told her to stop wearing them." Bucky said and Natasha poked her toe into his thigh and he laughed. Steve knew that Natalia was technically Nat's formal name and Natasha a nickname but it seemed so intimate when Bucky called her that. He did it since he moved into the facility and apologized several times for shooting her.

"But then people would realize that she's a midget if she starts wearing flats!" Buck laughed at his own joke until Nat's foot kicked him in the head.

Natasha patted the couch next to her head. "Come sit with us, Steve. You can make sure I don't kill James if he keeps talking."

"I was just gonna eat that and then go to bed. See you tomorrow!" He quickly left the room and got to his apartment. Was this a thing between Natasha and Bucky? Meeting in the middle of the night and Bucky rubbing her feet? Why did she never ask him to massage her feet? He would do it in a heartbeat!

* * *

Steve was called on a mission two days later and took Sam and Wanda with him to deal with a situation in South Asia. Natasha had to handle something from her past and told him before he left that she wanted to take Bucky with her. He didn't show it but he was surprised by her request but agreed to it. They could have each other's back and he felt better knowing that Buck was with her. He was always worried when Nat went on one of her solo missions.

They had to stay longer in South Asia than expected and Natasha and Bucky were already back when they returned. They were in the common kitchen cooking and Natasha was laughing and Bucky seemed pretty pleased with himself.

Steve clenched his jaw at the sight. He tried to get a grip. He should be happy that Bucky found another friend in Natasha. And if she was more than a friend to him, well good for them.

"You okay there, Cap?" Sam asked him and he was bit startled. He had completely forgotten that Sam and Wanda were with him.

"Of course."

"You sure?"

"Yes!" He hissed and when he looked at Wanda she was giving him a funny look. He shook his head and walked fully into the kitchen.

"Hey guys." Natasha greeted them. "James and I are making Stroganoff."

Wanda clapped her hands and walked to the kitchen isle. "I haven't had it in ages!" She got a spoon out of the drawer and tried it. "Mm, very good!"

Bucky smiled at her and asked him and Sam to set the table. They did and all of them ate the dish Buck and Nat made. It really tasted good and he had two servings.

He left after dinner to deal with the paperwork that came with every mission. Nat's report on her mission with Bucky was already on his desk and he read it before he got to work on his own. They had been in Russia taking out a small group of terrorists that had connections to the leftovers of the KGB. They posed as a couple to get their way into the organization. He was proud of them that they took out the cell within two days but did they really have to pretend to be a couple? Had that really been necessary?

There was a knock on his door and he hoped it would be Nat but it was Sam who poked his head through. "Need help with that report?" The door got opened wider and he stepped into Steve's office. "Wanda is knocked out. Poor kid could barely keep her eyes open, Bucky's carrying her to her quarters."

"Sure, I could use some help." He held up the file with Nat's report on her mission with Buck. "You wanna read it?"

Sam shook his head. "No, they already told us about their thing in Russia. Pretty impressive how they took down that terror cell."

He nodded absently. Would Natasha have asked him to come with her if he hadn't been needed in South Asia? Or had Bucky been her first choice right from the beginning?

"Does it bother you that they pretended to be an item to get into that gala?" Sam asked.

He knew he was shaking his head too strong. "No, of course not! Why would it bother me?"

Sam raised an eyebrow and gave him a pointed look. Sam had pretty much since the moment he met Natasha asked Steve if he had feelings for her. And his answer was every time no, she was just his friend!

"It's okay if you're jealous about that. I noticed how close Nat and Bucky got over the last months. Guess their shared life experience makes them kindred spirits."

Steve thought back to a conversation he had with Natasha two years ago in car on their way to New Jersey. She had asked him what he wanted her to be and he had asked her to be his friend. He couldn't just change his mind and ask more from her, it wasn't fair to her. And he had a feeling he was already too late to win her heart.

"They would make a great couple."

Sam snorted. "You really believe that? _You?_ I see the way you look at her, Steve! You don't want her to date your best friend."

He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his noise. "I have no idea what you mean. And it only matters what she wants. And what Buck wants."

"You're an idiot." Sam said and took a mission sheet to fill it out.

* * *

Steve was lifting weights in the gym while Bucky taught Wanda some self defense moves on the mat. She was a bit grumpy that she had to learn how to fight in case she couldn't rely on her powers. Natasha entered the gym in one of her tight yoga pants and only a sports bra and he almost dropped the weights at the sight she made. She had an incredible figure and he was only a man. She nodded at him and then walked to the windows to roll her yoga mat out and started her workout. Steve tried his best to focus on his own workout but he couldn't stop glancing in her direction. He didn't know how the positions she bent her body in were called but she looked really good doing them.

"Stop staring!" Buck chuckled and was suddenly next to him on the other bench press. Shit! He just got caught ogling the woman his best friend seemed to try to court.

Steve didn't say anything in return but kept lifting his weights. He had been at it for some time and built up some sweat when Nat was suddenly hovering over his face and looking down at him with a smile.

"Hey, Steve! You want to go with me to Joe's tonight? He's gonna move some tables and there'll be dancing. I'm sure it's gonna be fun!"

Why was she asking _him_ to go with her dancing? Shouldn't she ask Bucky? And also he didn't know how to dance, didn't she know that? Had Bucky turned her down and now she was asking him as some kind of rebound? He got angry at that thought.

"No, thanks!" He said a little too harsh because he noticed how Nat slightly winced but then quickly collected herself.

"You want me to go with you, Natalia?" Bucky asked. Did she not ask him first? Did Steve just make a stupid mistake?

Nat threw him a look and then her eyes went to Bucky. "I haven't gone out in ages, so yeah. Let's go together, Barnes."

Bucky gave her a charming smile. "Great! I'll pick you up at eight, okay? Don't worry, I still got the moves, doll!" He moved his hips and she laughed.

"If you say so. See you tonight, James." With that she left without acknowledging Steve again.

"You're an idiot, punk." Bucky said and went back to lifting weights.

Steve knew he was probably crossing some serious lines but he just had to watch the security footage of how Bucky picked up Nat at her door. Buck was wearing slacks and a dress shirt and Nat wore a pretty black dress, she looked stunning but then again she was always beautiful. He really thought Bucky had more manners but that jerk really didn't give Nat flowers or chocolate when he picked her up. He should really put more effort in their first date. Steve spent the evening reading files about people who could be potential recruits for the Avengers but the couldn't stop thinking that he would have given Nat flowers and chocolate if he had gotten to be the one to take her out. Well, she did ask him and he said no and it wouldn't have been a date if he would have be the one going with her.

"Sergeant Barnes and Miss Romanoff have returned, sir." FRIDAY informed him and he checked the time. It was way after midnight. Must have been a great date. FRIDAY put the security footage without him asking her to on his screen and he saw how Buck walked Natasha to her door and she smiled and gave him a kiss on the cheek before she walked into her quarters. Would he have gotten a kiss too if he had gone with her? Bucky walked down the hallway probably to get to the apartment he shared with Steve but he wasn't smiling from ear to ear like Steve thought he would. Punk just got kissed by Natasha Romanoff, why wasn't he over the fucking moon?

* * *

Steve hadn't been with them when they had to raid a HYDRA cell so he had no idea what was going on when Bucky ran with Natasha in his arms through the medical wing, Wanda and Sam right behind him.

He had been in the infirmary for his regular check and his heart almost stopped when Bucky practically burst through the door with Natasha. "Where's Cho?"

"I'm right here, Sergeant Barnes." Helen motioned for Bucky to lay Natasha on a bed. What had happend to her? She was pale, sweaty and seemed delirious. "What happend?"

"She must have inhaled something. Some kind of virus." Sam said from the door, he and Wanda made room for the rest of the medical team. "She's got a high fever, shivering fit and tachycardia."

Dr. Cho took Natasha's temperature and grimaced. God, that couldn't mean anything good. "How high was her fever on the way to here?"

"102,5" Wanda answered and Steve saw how scared she was. He wanted to say something comforting but he was scared shitless himself. He'd never seen Natasha like this before.

"It's now 105,8."

Fuck! Her fever was so high that she could die from it.

Cho turned to her team and told them to hook Nat on fluids and to take a sample of her blood to find out what caused this. She also gave her something to sleep and Natasha stopped moaning and twisting in pain. She was moved to another room and Steve watched her through the blinds praying that she would be better soon.

"What exactly happend?" He asked Wanda because Bucky took off after they brought Nat to her room and Sam left to pick up Banner in case Dr. Cho's expertise wasn't enough.

"Everything was fine. We already secured the Chitauri weapons while Bucky and Natasha did one more swipe through the building and then ten minutes later they both came back and Natasha was fine and then she suddenly collapsed right before us. One moment she was smiling and then everything went to hell." Wanda sounded like she was trying to hold off tears.

"She's gonna be okay, kid."

"You don't know that." She was right, he really didn't. And he didn't know what he was gonna do if she wouldn't be okay. Living in a world without Natasha seemed pointless.

He didn't know if he had been standing there with Wanda watching Nat for minutes or hours but he knew that Bucky still hadn't come to check on her. "Where's Buck?"

"Probably drowning in guilt. He was out of his mind during our flight back. Kept saying that you will never forgive him for this."

"Huh?" He couldn't quite follow.

"He thinks, I could see it in his mind, that it's his job to look after Natasha when you're not there."

What on earth was that supposed to mean? "You should all watch each others back during an op!"

"And we do. But I think Bucky thinks he has to especially make sure that Nat's safe." Yeah, cause Buck was sweet on her. "Because he knows... he knows what she means to you." Wanda mumbled out.

His head snapped into her direction. WHAT? Should he try to deny it? Probably pointless with a girl who was some kind of empath. He decided to take another route. "I'm sure he wants to make sure that she's okay because of what she means to him."

Wanda gave him a funny look. "Do you really believe that? Do you think that Bucky has feeling for Natasha?"

"I don't think that, I know that." He grunted and chided himself for being bothered by that while Natasha was so sick.

"You're an idiot." Wanda said and turned her head back to watch Natasha. He really wished people would stop calling him that!

Cho joined them a few minutes later with a stoic look on her face. "We got the results from her blood test. It doesn't look good. HYDRA developed a lethal virus that will kill her."

And just like that Steve's whole world crumbled down and he wanted to scream and punch. Not her!

"Isn't there anything you can do, Helen?" Wanda's voice was barely a whisper.

"Possibly. I want to give Romanoff a blood transfusion. I want to give her your blood, Captain Rogers. We hope that your serum destroys the virus."

"But you said yourself that I couldn't donate blood because of the high risk that the patient's body would reject it. You said it was too dangerous to try it!"

"Yes, but she will die without the transfusion. This might save her. It can't get worse for her, Steve."

He looked from Cho and Wanda to Natasha who was still asleep and would possibly sleep forever. She wasn't moving but her eyes moved under her eyelids and her face was covered in sweat. He couldn't lose her, he would do anything to help her. "Okay, let's do it."

Helen nodded and he got into Nat's room and sat down on a chair next to her. Not wanting to waste too much time, Dr. Cho connected his IV directly to Natasha and Steve watched how his blood flowed from his arm into hers. He prayed that her body wouldn't reject his serum and it would heal her.

"Now we wait." Cho removed the IV and left him alone with Natasha. He wanted to hold her hand but he wasn't sure if she would have been okay with it so he didn't do it in the end. He was offered that someone of the medical staff could sit with her but he declined. He couldn't just leave. He needed to be here. What if these were his last moments with her? The thought filled his eyes with tears and he quickly blinked them away. What if he would never get the chance to tell her what she meant to him? He couldn't go there, he had to have hope. She would be okay, she was one tough cookie like Clint always used to say. Nat would be okay, she had to. He couldn't do this without her.

"Steve?"

Bucky's voice got him out his trance and he turned his head to the door. Buck was standing there guilt all over his face. "How is she? Is she gonna be okay?"

"I don't know. They gave her my blood. They hope the serum will fix her."

Bucky walked into the room and stopped in front of Nat's bed. "She looks so small. She's even tinier than you were before the serum."

"Yeah, I know." He had to smile.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect her. I should have... I don't even know when she got in contact with that virus. I shouldn't have let that happen to her. I'm sorry."

"Buck, this isn't your fault. It's no ones fault but HYDRA."

He didn't look convinced but nodded probably to please him. Bucky gave Nat one last look before he turned to leave.

"No, wait!" Steve got up even thought he didn't want to leave Natasha's side. "You should sit here. Since you're... You should be the one being here when she wakes up."

Bucky gave him a puzzled look and then rolled his eyes. "So that's why you're acting so weird. Steve, do you think that Natalia and I are a thing?"

"Well you are, aren't you?"

He shook his head. "No, we are not and we never will be. We're friends. We both know what's like to be weapons. It's nice to have someone who understands something no one ever can. Believe I'm not the one she's interested in. And I'm not interested in her."

"Oh, okay." He had been so sure that something was going on between them but Bucky didn't look like he was lying.

"And believe me when I say that you should be the one waiting for her to wake up. She wants you here, I know that." With that Bucky left and Steve was even more confused. What did that mean?

He stayed the whole night sitting by her bed and he almost crushed Dr. Cho with his hug when she told him that her fever was sinking and the serum was working on destroying the virus.

"There's a chance that she'll be enhanced as well."

"What?"

"The serum is regenerating itself in her body. It's likely that it won't leave her system. We have to wait and take a few more test."

He looked at Natasha in shock. God, what if they had turned her against her will into a super soldier? She wouldn't die but her life was about to change and she had no say in the whole thing.

Two hours later Natasha opened her eyes and he completely forgot the whole enhancement thing. "Nat?"

"Thirsty" She rasped out. He quickly got the water glass and held the straw against her lips. She took a few sips and then pulled away. "Thanks."

"How are you?"

"Tired. My body hurts but it's okay. I've had worse." She suddenly grabbed his hand that was on her bed. "Thank you for being here."

"You don't have to thank me. No place I'd rather be!"

She smiled brightly at that and he felt like he won something special. Maybe he did have a chance at winning her heart.

Dr. Cho chose that moment to come in and told Natasha everything she had told him two hours ago. She also added that the reason she didn't reject the super soldier serum was that she already had the Red Room serum running through her veins. Cho didn't think that Natasha would be as strong or resistant as him but she would still get the advantages of the serum.

"So I can rip logs in half?" Natasha asked with a smirk and Cho looked confused.

"I guess that's possible." Cho took a sample Nat's blood and left.

"You're okay with this? Being enhanced?" He still felt bad about changing her body without her consent.

She took his hand again. "Yes, I am. I would have died if you didn't have given me your blood so thank you for saving my life, Steve. And I don't see how me being stronger and faster is a bad thing. It's an advantage, I don't mind."

"Okay." He took a deep breath. "Are you in love with Bucky?" Just because Buck said she wasn't, didn't mean it was the truth.

She raised her eyebrows. "What? Where's that coming from?"

"Well, you let him rub your feet and you pretended to be a couple and then you went on date with him to Joe's."

"He just massaged my feet because they were hurting. We had to pretend to be in item because the theme of the gala was endless love." She looked suddenly angry and hurt at the same time. "And I did not go on a date with James! He took pity on me because the guy I asked out said no."

Wait a minute, he was the guy who had said no. "Um, Natasha..."

"So no, Bucky is not the super soldier I'm in love with but I can take a hint." She let go of his hand and crossed her arms over her chest. "I know when someone doesn't want me."

 _Bucky is not the super soldier I'm in love._ Did that mean that...

Oh God, he truly was an idiot! "Natasha, I... I'm sorry. I thought this whole time you and Buck were getting close." Well, here goes nothing. "And I was so jealous about that. Because... Because I'm in love with you."

He didn't know what he expect but it was definitely not Natasha looking even angrier. He had been kinda hoping that he would get a kiss. "Then why did you say no when I asked you out? Do you know how hard that was for me? I kept telling myself for months that I shouldn't do it and then I finally find the courage and you turn me down and now you're saying that you love me?! Seriously? After thinking I'm in love with your best friend?"

"I'm sorry I thought you only asked me because Bucky said no. I really wanted to go with you but the truth is I also don't know how to dance."

"I would have taught you."

"I know. I'm sorry. I never thought I would have a chance with you. Especially with Bucky in the picture."

"He was never in the picture."

"Yeah, I know that now."

"You're an idiot, Rogers."

He smiled. "So I've been told."

Natasha was grinning back. "Good." She moved in the bed to make room and patted the spot. "Come. You can be my pillow."

He chuckled and got out of his boots and crawled under the blankets with her. God, it was like she was made to fit into his arms. She wrapped her arm around his waist and placed her head on his chest.

"I can't believe it takes me almost dying for you to figure things out."

"Yeah, sorry about that. But since I know, can you please never do that again?"

"I try." She looked up at him with mischief in her eyes. "So what does a girl around here have to do to get a kiss?"

He grinned. "Well she could tell me again that she is in love with me. That might get her what she wants."

She rolled her eyes and then smiled softly. "I love you, Steve."

God, it felt so good to hear these words from her. He brushed her hair out of her beautiful face. "I love you,too." And then they finally had their first real kiss and he went to heaven.


	23. What's new pussycat?

_Wanda accidentally turns Steve into a cat._

 _I don't even know what came over me, I guess this qualifies as crack._

* * *

Natasha just came back from a trip to DC to talk with the senate and was glad that she was finally back home. A few months ago she found a house near the Avengers facility and bought it. Most Avengers moved out once the facility was more like a new SHIELD and no one except Steve and Vision wanted to stay there. Rhodey lived just down the street and Sam's house where he lived with Wanda was only a five minute walk away. Natasha loved her house and she spent a lot of time decorating it the way she wanted. She drove up her short driveway and parked her car. She got out and a cat was running towards her meowing loudly and bumping its head against her shin. She almost dropped her purse. This cat did not belong to her and she had zero experience when it came to animals.

She starred down at the cat. "Go away! Go back home!"

She tried to get to her front door but the cat kept walking in front of her feet and she was scared that she would hurt it with her high-heeled boots. She somehow managed to get inside but she could still hear the cat from the other side of the door. She wanted to leave the cat outside thinking it would eventually go away but she did felt guilty. A storm was coming and maybe that cat didn't even have a home. Like always when she didn't know what the right thing to do was she thought about what Steve would do. He definitely wouldn't let that poor thing sitting outside with a storm coming. She sighed and opened the door.

"Okay, you can came in but don't pee anywhere! Got it?"

Was she imagining things or did that cat just nod at her? She shook her head and took a closer look. Were all cats this big? It almost reached her knees, was that normal? And did call cats look so muscular? Really that furball looked like it worked out. And the fur also was interesting, it was a mix between blond and brown. And the cat's eyes were blue with flecks of green. Did all cats have so beautiful eyes? They reminded her of something but she didn't know what it was.

"Are you hungry?"

The cat walked into her kitchen. Okay, did it know where her kitchen was? Now that the cat was walking in front of her, she could see that it was a male. She still wondered how he knew where her kitchen was. Maybe he smelled it. She followed the cat into the kitchen and looked through her cabinets. She could have sworn she had seen here canned tuna a few days ago.

"Bingo! You want some tuna?" Wow, she really was talking to a cat. She was grateful that she was living alone and no one could see her like this. She put the tuna into a small bowl and filled another with water and placed it on the floor where the cat was devouring both.

"Oh poor thing! You really don't have a home, do you?" Maybe she could convince Clint that the kids needed a cat. She couldn't take care of an animal, she sometimes wasn't home for weeks or months. Once the cat was done eating he looked at her with wide eyes. Should she get some blankets to make a bed to sleep for him? She would call Clint tomorrow if he had place for a cat at his farm. She put a frozen pizza in the oven explaining to the cat that humans needed to eat as well (dear Lord was she turning into a crazy cat lady?!) and went upstairs to find old blankets and towels for the cat. He followed her into her bedroom and watched her going through her lining closet pulling out an old blanket. Suddenly the cat jumped on her dresser and bumped his head against a sketch of herself that Steve made her for her birthday.

"Woah, buddy! Stop that!" She grabbed the cat and placed him back on the ground. "A friend made that for me. Don't destroy it."

She turned around to get comfortable clothes out of her closet and when she looked over her shoulder that freaking cat was again on the dresser putting his paw on the sketch. "No, no! Get down!" She grabbed the cat again and put him back on the floor. "Stop that! That drawing means a lot to me. If you keep doing that, I'll have to kick you out!"

That threat seemed to work since the cat just starred at her and looked like it was furrowing his eyebrows. Could cats even do that? She unzipped her dress and let it fall to the floor and when she picked it up and looked at the cat, his eyes were wide and he ran away. What was now going on? She quickly changed into the hoodie she had stolen from Steve but never told him about it and yoga pants and followed the cat.

"Hey buddy, where are you?"

She walked down the stairs and found the cat waiting for her in the hallway. Her oven made a ping sound telling her that her pizza was done. She got it out of the oven, poured herself a glass of wine and sat down in front of the tv. She patted the spot next to her and the cat jumped on the couch. She probably would have to deal with his hair on her sofa later but she wanted to see if cats really purred like everyone said. She watched Breakfast at Tiffany's since she now also had a cat with no name and after she was done with her pizza she pulled the cat on her lap and petted his fur. Cats really did purr and the sound was so soothing and relaxing. In fact it was so relaxing that she fell asleep on the couch with the cat on her lap.

The thunderstorm woke her up and she could feel the cat's heart beating wildly in his chest. "Poor thing. That thunder must be so loud for your tiny ears." She had to admit that the cat was really cute. She carried him in her arms upstairs and out of pity she let the cat sleep in her bed. She remembered how scared she had been during thunderstorms as a kid and no one in the Red Room had comforted her.

The buzzing of her phone woke her up in the middle of the night. The cat was sprawled on top of her and had his little face buried in her neck. God, it was so cute but she suddenly chided herself for not checking if the cat had any fleas or tics. She really hoped the little dude was clean.

She answered her phone. "Yeah?"

"Nat, have you heard from Steve?" Sam's voice sounded panicked and she immediately shot up forgetting that a cat was sleeping on top of her. The cat jumped and kinda looked pissed for getting woken up.

"No. Why? Did something happen?"

"He went hiking with Wanda yesterday and on their way back he was suddenly gone."

"And you're just telling me this now?!"

"I didn't know if you were back and we didn't want to worry you."

Well, she was worried now. More than worried, Steve would never just leave Wanda without saying anything. "What did Wanda say?"

"Said that they were almost out of the woods and talking about her powers and then he was gone."

"Maybe Wanda did something to him? Unintentionally?"

"Could be. She isn't ruling it out but she's also not sure what she could have done."

"I just hope Steve's okay!" She sighed out and wanted to get out of bed. They had to look for him. Maybe he was still in that forest. The cat was suddenly jumping on her lap and putting his paw on her face. Um, was that something all cats did?

"Wanda said they were talking about her powers and then about animals. Steve told her his mom used to have a cat and then Wanda wondered if she could get her own and Steve was gone."

The cat stood on his hind legs and now had two paws on her cheeks. God, she really had no time for this now! Steve was missing! She looked at the cat and those eyes... She knew those eyes. What did Sam say? They were talking about Wanda's powers and cats? There was a chance she was losing it but the cat had the exact same eye color as Steve.

"Steve?"

"Meow!" The cat bumped his head against her chin. That was a yes, right?

"Nat?" Right she was still on the phone with Sam. "You still there?"

"One minute." She dropped the phone on the bed and looked at the cat. She couldn't believe what she was going to say next. "Steve, if this is you, I want you to blink at me twice."

The cat blinked twice and seemed excited. Oh God, that was Steve! Wanda turned Steve into a freaking cat!

She pressed her phone against her ear. "Steve's here and he's a cat!"

"What?"

"Wanda turned him into a cat!"

"We'll be there in five minutes." Sam promised and hung up.

Now that she knew who the cat was she was trying to wrap her head around the fact that Steve Rogers was currently a little furball. She couldn't help but feel bad for him,turning into another species but must be fucking weird.

"I'm sorry this happend to you, Steve. If it's any constellation you make a cute cat!" Steve meowed and she got out of bed and Steve was following her downstairs. The sound of his little paws patting on the wood floor was too freaking cute!

Sam and Wanda were already at her front door when she got into the hallway and she let them in. Sam stared at the cat in disbelief while Wanda just looked guilty.

"I had no idea I could do this." She whispered and kneeled down to pet Steve. "I'm so sorry!"

"Are you hundred percent sure that's Steve and not just some stray?" Sam asked her.

"Yes." She looked down at Steve. "Steve, bite into Sam's shoelace!"

"Holy fuck!" Sam exclaimed when the cat did what she told him. "It's really Steve!"

"Can you fix him? Turn him back?" Natasha asked Wanda.

The girl shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. I'm not even sure how I did it in the first place."

That was just great! Steve couldn't stay a cat forever! The team needed him. She needed him!

Sam spoke up. "I think I know how to fix it!"

Both she, Wanda and Steve looked at him. "And how?"

"Come on, you know how this works! True love's kiss!" He grinned at them.

Natasha couldn't help but laugh at that. "Yeah, sure. Let me just find his one true love. You know there is no one and I highly doubt he will find a woman as a cat!"

"Um, there is someone." Wanda whispered and Steve's paw was suddenly on her leg like he was trying to stop her. "Ouch, stop that! Your crawls are really sharp!"

Steve let go off Wanda's leg. There was someone? How did he find someone without her knowledge? Did he really manage to keep a secret from her? "Who is it? Actually never mind. We don't even know that will work. I mean this is not some fairytale and Wanda's not a real witch."

"She turned Steve into a cat, she's a real witch!" Sam insisted and gave her a funny look. "Do you have a better idea?"

Well, she really hadn't but true love's kiss sounded so ridiculous. But she really wanted to know who Steve's girlfriend was. Was it someone who worked at the facility?

Wanda petted Steve on the head. "I'm sorry but I don't know how else to fix this." She said to the cat. "I think we should try this true love's kiss theory."

Natasha sat down in the defeat on the stairs. "Fine, maybe magic is real and can turn Steve back. So who do we have to call to get the girl here?"

"We don't have to call anyone." Wanda said and Steve meowed and it almost seemed like he wanted to drown Wanda's words like that.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Sam looked annoyed. "Isn't it obvious? Steve gets turned into a cat and who does he run to? Where does he seek shelter?"

Huh? Well, Steve came to her but that didn't mean... Her house was pretty far away from the forest for a cat. The facility was closer. So did that mean that-

"It's you, Natasha." Wanda said softly. "Steve's in love with you."

She stared at Wanda and then at Steve who was hiding behind Sam's legs. Was it true? Was Steve in love with her? "Steve?"

Sam grabbed Wanda's arm gently. "I think we should leave. Let them deal with this on their own."

She barely noticed how the door closed behind Wanda and Sam. Did Steve love her? And was what she felt for him love? She knew that her feelings for him were different from what she felt for Clint but she never really knew what romantic love felt like. He was her friend, her best friend and she knew it wasn't normal to think about kissing your best friend and to do other things to him that would probably make Steve furiously blush if she told him about it.

She looked up and Steve was hiding behind the basket she stored her umbrellas in. "Steve, I can still see you!"

His little head poked around the corner and he meowed. God, she would be devastated if she would never hear his voice again. Or get to eat Chinese take out with him while they were going over mission reports in his office. Or he would never ask her again with red cheeks if she could pose for a sketch. Her life would be so sad without his presence in it. But she also knew that she would take care of him if he stayed as a cat.

She patted the space next to her. "Come here. Please."

Steve jumped on the staircase and looked at her with wide eyes. "You don't have to be embarrassed about that. I just think that your taste could use some improvement. There are so much better choices out there."

He shook his head and she had to smile. It felt nice to know that someone like Steve could love her. She picked him up and held him in front of her face. "Okay, let's give it a try." She kissed his forehead and waited. Nothing. She kissed his forehead again and cat hair got stuck to her mouth but Steve didn't turn back. "I'm sorry. We'll go to the facility later for some tests, okay?"

She pressed Steve against her chest and walked with him back to her bed. She didn't think that it would've worked but what if science couldn't fix this and Wanda would never find out how she did it? She should probably get some books on cats and a cat tree for Steve.

She laid on her side and Steve rolled himself into a ball and looked at her with his beautiful eyes.

"I'm so sorry. I don't know how to help you, Steve." She closed her eyes. "I promise no matter what will happen, I will always be there for you."

* * *

She woke up the next morning with a heavy and muscular arm draped over her stomach. Did she bring someone home last night? No, she came back from DC and there was this cat...

Steve! She yanked her eyes open and looked to the side. There was no cat in her bed but a human super soldier! Thank God!

"Steve!" She shook him and he tried to push her hand away. "Steve, wake up. You're not a cat anymore!"

He blinked his eyes open and then rolled onto his bed. "Oh thank God! I thought this was a permanent thing! Remind me to never talk to Wanda about cats again!"

She was so happy that he was back that she could kiss him. And that was what she did. She cupped his face and kissed his lips. Steve made a startle sound and didn't kiss her back. Wait, why was he not kissing her? She thought he was in love with her!

She broke the kiss and pulled away. God that was so embarrassing. "Sorry." She mumbled and wanted to get out of bed. She should probably call Sam and Wanda to let them know that Steve was human again and to tell them to go fuck themselves for making her think that Steve loved her.

Steve's hand was suddenly wrapped around her arm. "Did you just kiss me because I'm me again or because you want to kiss me?"

"Both?"

"Do you want to kiss me again?"

"Maybe? I mean, yes. I do want to kiss you but only if you kiss me back. Otherwise it's a bit humiliating."

He leaned forward, cupped her face and kissed her breathless. "I can I take you on a date?"

"Yeah." She kissed him again because boy that was now her new favorite thing in the world. " You wanna go to a cat cafe?"

He laughed and she was so happy that she could hear his voice again. And a few minutes later she found out that Steve's purrs were so much better cat purrs.


	24. Favorite person

_Everyone tells Natasha that Steve has feelings for her. She doesn't believe them until she finds Steve's sketchbook._

* * *

Natasha paid the cab driver and shouldered her duffel bag. The first thing she would do was to take a long and hot bath and then order some Thai food and eat it in her bed. She had been the last two weeks in Columbia taking out a cartel for Fury. The mission was a success but her whole body hurt and she was tired. She was glad to be finally back in Manhattan and to sleep in her own bed. She walked up to the third floor, unlocked her door and dropped her duffel bag. Home sweet home. She heard noises coming from the living room and her body tensed. She was about to pull her gun when she identified the noises. They were coming from the TV, Dog Cops was on. Clint's favorite show which meant that he was here.

She walked into the living room where Clint was laying on her couch with a pizza box on his stomach watching his show. "Hey Tasha."

"Don't get any grease on my sofa!" She warned him because her couch was a gift from Pepper and therefore probably expensive. "Couldn't you have broken into another apartment?"

"I didn't break in, you gave me keys. Remember?" He shoved the last pizza slice into his mouth. "Bobbi and I are taking a break."

"Again?" She lost count of the times these two got together and then broke up again. But she knew that if they weren't together at the moment meant that he wanted to stay at her place.

"She says she needs some time for herself whatever that means." Clint shrugged and tossed the pizza box on the coffee table. "Cool if I stay here for some time?"

"You've got your own floor at Stark Tower!"

Clint grinned at her and probably thought it was charming. "You're not living there for the same reason I'm not living there, Tasha. Besides your place is so much nicer."

He was right about the first part. They were both spies and a prominent address was dangerous. And she didn't like the fact that JARVIS was everywhere. A spy needed their privacy.

"How was Columbia?" He made room for her on the couch but she didn't sit down. Just because Clint was here, didn't mean she wouldn't have her hot bath.

"The usual."

She told Clint that she was gonna take a bath and was already hallway out of the living room when he called her again. "Yeah?"

"Cap showed up today by the way. Looked really surprised when I opened the door. Almost jealous." Clint laughed a little. "Anyway, I'm supposed to tell you to call him when you're back. He said you knew what it was about."

She did. She promised him that she would teach him how to dance after they had watched Dancing in the Rain together and he admitted that he couldn't dance at all. But why would Steve look jealous? If he wanted Clint as his roommate, he could totally have him!

The bath was like heaven for her sore body and she felt so much better snuggled into her fluffy bathrobe eating her Thai food that Clint got her while she was in the bathroom.

"Tasha, can I ask you something?" Clint asked from the other end of the couch not taking his eyes of the TV.

"You can. Doesn't mean I'll answer."

She didn't need to look that he was rolling his eyes. "What's going on between Captain Abs and you?"

"Nothing."

"Really? You haven't noticed that you two are always hanging out? And when you're not there Steve talks about you all the time. He even wanted to contact Fury to make sure that your mission went well."

He did? Well, how would she know that if she wasn't there?! "He's my friend. You and I hang out a lot too if we're not working or you're back together with Bobbi."

"True, but I don't look at you like you're the greatest invention after pizza."

What the fuck did that even mean? "Is there a point to any of this?"

"I think you should ask Steve out on a date."

She had to laugh at that. In what universe would Steve Rogers want to go out with her. He would probably say yes because he wouldn't want to hurt her feelings but she didn't think that he would do it because he wanted to. And she definitely didn't want to go on a date with Steve.

"And I think you should watch Dog Cops less. It's clearly bad for your brain."

Clint threw a pillow at her that she easily caught. "He won't say no. He fancies you."

Sure and Loki was actually a peace-loving new age hippie.

* * *

When Steve asked her to teach him how to dance she assumed that it would happen in his apartment but they didn't stay at his apartment and walked to a senior center where an old Cuban gentleman gave dance lessons. She was more than surprised by that. He could have just gone alone, he didn't need her company. He would have found a dance partner in no time with the way the old ladies were looking at him. And they actually offered to dance with him even though she was standing right beside him!

She felt bad for thinking it but Steve was truly a bad dancer. He stepped on her feet constantly and his eyes were fixed on the ground.

"Hey, look at me."

He did and seemed embarrassed. "Told you I would be no good at it."

"You're trying too hard. Dancing is a lot like fighting, Steve. Listen to your body and the music. Let me lead for one dance and just follow me, okay?"

He nodded and she took over the lead and after a few moments things were better. He didn't step on her feet but he was still staring at his own. It was kinda nice to know that Captain America was not good at everything. After a few more tries he could at least dance a decent waltz. He was no Fred Astaire but there was potential.

"Thank you for doing this, Nat."

"No problem. I was a bit surprised though that you want to take dance lessons."

"I like that they have an actual band."

Coming from his era, he probably preferred live music to a record.

It was bound to happen and someone recognized Steve and asked him if he could help them move something into the basement. Steve being Steve said of course yes and excused himself to help them. He truly was too kind.

A woman used that chance to talk to her. Agnes was her name if she remembered correctly. "You and your boyfriend make a really cute couple."

"He's not my boyfriend."

The lady raised a thin eyebrow. "Does he know that? Because the way he looks at you makes it seem like he's your boyfriend."

"I think he was mostly staring at his feet."

Agnes seemed amused by that. "True. But he did look at you from time to time and he was clearly smitten with what he saw. I think my husband stopped looking at me like that thirty years ago." Um, was she supposed to say something about that? Except that the woman clearly had a bad sight if she thought that Steve looked at her like he was her lover. "And I was there when he signed up for the class last week and Betsy asked him if his plus one was someone special and he blushed furiously." Well, Steve blushed a lot. It was kinda cute.

She was saved by Steve from this weird conversation when he came back and they did one last waltz and then the class was over. Steve asked her if she wanted to get something to eat which she happily answered with a yes because she was starving (Clint staying at her place meant that the fridge was pretty much empty all the time because he ate everything but didn't go grocery shopping). Right before they left to get burgers Agnes was winking at her and she fought the urge to roll her eyes.

It also didn't help when the waiter who looked like he should play a grandpa in a Disney movie told Steve what a beautiful girlfriend he had and Steve got as a red as a tomato. And when she informed him that she wasn't his girlfriend the man said that Steve should change that immediately.

Really, what was it with old people today?

* * *

Sam was in town and she and Clint met him and Steve for some drinks in a hipster bar in Brooklyn. They had been trying to recruit Sam for the Avengers for some time now but he didn't want to leave his veterans behind and was still undecided to join the team. But tonight they were just four friends having a good time.

"So you're telling me that you two never hooked up?" Sam still couldn't believe that she and Clint were never a thing.

"Please, would you hit that?" She pointed at Clint who made offended noises.

"I'm a total catch, I'll have you know! Just ask Bobbi!"

"That's why you two are on a break again?" She teased and Clint stuck his tongue out. Very mature!

Steve was mostly quiet during that conversation but seemed happy that she and Clint were never a thing. Probably because it would have caused problems on the team. She was a strong believer of don't fuck where you work.

Clint and Steve left to get more drinks and Sam smiled at her in a weird way. Was that his way of flirting? She really thought he would be smoother than that.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"You got something on your mind, Wilson. Spit it out!"

"Fine!" He laughed. "But don't kill me! You and Cap, it's nice. I wondered when something would happen between you two."

Not him too! She was getting sick of people assuming there was something going on! There wasn't! Didn't people realize Steve could do so much better than her? "Sam, there is nothing. Whatever you think you're seeing, it's not there!"

"So you two aren't taking dancing lessons?"

Well yeah, but it was more that Steve took them and she tagged along. She already knew how to dance, thank you very much! "So?"

Sam narrowed his eyes. "He never told you about finding the right partner?"

Um, no? She had no idea what Sam was talking about. Steve asked her to teach him or to come with him because she was pretty much his only female friend. Sam looked like he wanted to say more but Steve and Clint were heading towards their table with new drinks.

"You guyswanna play darts? Clint asked clearly thinking he would win.

Sam immediately said he would be on Clint's team which meant that she had to team up with Steve. Not that it was a burden or anything because they beat Sam and Clint easily. At one point Steve had his hands on her naked shoulders and she felt a shiver running down her spine. She was surprised how much she liked the feeling of his big and warm hands on her skin. And what shocked her was that when he pulled his hands away she wanted them back on her body again. What was that all about? She usually didn't like it when people touched her.

* * *

Going with Steve to the senior center for dancing was a lot of fun even though the old people still didn't believe her when she said that they weren't a couple. Did they ask Steve the same questions or was she the only getting bombarded with questions why she wasn't climbing that man like a tree? She almost spit her coffee out when 89 year old Betsy asked her that during a break. But she did catch the men grinning at her while Steve was sporting a cute shade of pink on his cheeks.

They did the cha-cha today and she was in a really good mood but that changed when they walked out of the senior center and Tony was leaning against his car and grinning at them. How did he even know they were here?

"Hey you two!" He waved and put his sunglasses on his head. "Did you tango enough for the day?"

"What are you doing here?" Steve sounded annoyed. Not that she could blame him.

"Fury called. He needs us to assemble. Thought I'd pick you two up."

Tony tried to tease Steve with dance movie references that he didn't get since she was pretty sure he never saw any of the Step up movies. As it turned out Dr. Doom was trying to take over DC and the Avengers were needed to take out his doombots. It took them two hours but then DC was free of any hostile robots. Natasha sprained her ankle when one doombot threw her off their back and she didn't quite manage to land safely on her feet. She didn't want to go to the hospital because she didn't think it was necessary but she gave in when Steve asked her with puppy eyes to do it. He looked like he wanted to come with her but the press had some questions for him so Tony went with her. She didn't really get why because she was sure that he would have loved to pose for photos.

"You didn't have to come with me." She said to him while they waited for her to get an x-ray.

"I know. But let Spangles get some love from the press. I'm sure Coulson is happy when he gets new pics for his Captain America scrapbook."

She had to smirk at that. There was probably some truth to it.

"I actually came with you because I wanted to talk to you about something. It's not like the two of us are spending a lot of time together. I thought I could use this to get you alone."

"You realize that makes you sound like a serial killer."

Tony laughed. "I'm sure you can still take me out even with a bad ankle."

True.

"So what do you wanna talk about?"

"Steve." He said bluntly.

Not him too! Well, maybe he meant something else. "What about him."

Tony took a deep breath and had this smile on his face he had every time he thought about Pepper. "You know how it is when there's someone perfect for you right in front of your eyes but you don't realize it for years?"

"No."

He raised an eyebrow and she already didn't like where this conversation was going. "Really? You haven't noticed that Steve wants to be with you? It's pretty obvious that he has feelings for you. I'm surprised you didn't notice it yet." He gave her a calculating look. "Or maybe you have."

She snorted. "You really think someone like Steve wants to be with someone like me?"

"Pepper wants to be with me."

"Yeah, but you're not a murderer."

Tony gave her a sad smile. "Some people would disagree with you."

She didn't know what to say to that. It was true that his weapons killed people but he wasn't the one who pulled the trigger or killed them with their bare hands like she had done so many times.

"Anyway." Tony coughed. "I think you should give him a chance. You two could have something great. I'm so much happier with Pepper by my side."

The nurse walked in and told her that she could get her x-ray. Why did everyone assume that she liked Steve as well?

* * *

Thankfully no one wanted to talk with her about Steve or give her some advice about him in the next weeks and she was more than happy about that. She was in Brooklyn and decided to stop by Steve's place to see if he was home and wanted to go with her to a food festival. Someone just got out of Steve's apartment complex and she used the chance to get in. She jogged up the stairs to the second floor and knocked on his door.

"Hi!" Steve greeted her with a bright smile. "What are you doing here?"

She couldn't help but smile back. "I was in your neighborhood and wanted to ask you if you wanna go check out a food festival with me."

"Sounds great! You wanna come in for a moment while I change?" He stepped aside and let her in. She now noticed that he was wearing sweatpants.

She waited in his living room while he went to his bedroom to change his clothes. She took a look around but everything looked the same. Except for the sketchbook on his coffee table. It was the one she gave him for his birthday and never had seen again. She thought that he didn't like it and didn't use it because he used another one when he sketched the team but it looked like he did use it after all. She always had been noisy and she felt a bit bad but she really wanted to know what he used the book for.

She opened it and the first drawing was of her. So he did use it for his art. If memory served her right it was of her the day Coulson introduced them on the helicarrier. She remembered how excited Coulson had been that they finally found Captain America and she had been surprised how attractive he was in person. She turned the page and the next drawing was of her as well. And the one after that. She flicked through the pages and all of the sketches showed her. The last one was her in the dress she wore last week for their tango lessons. She took a closer look at the drawings and was amazed by the details Steve put into them. Some were colored and he really captured the color of her eyes perfectly. Was this how Steve saw her? And why were only drawings of her in this book? She wasn't vain but she looked beautiful in those sketches, strong and powerful. Were they all right? Did Steve like her?

"Hey Nat, do you think -" She still had the book in her lap when he came into the living room. "Fuck!"

She looked up and Steve looked mortified. Like he didn't want her to see these sketches. Why? They were breathtaking.

"I'm sorry. I probably shouldn't have drawn you without asking." He basically stumbled over the words.

"Why am I the only one in this book?"

"Um, because it was gift from you?"

She knew he was lying. And here she thought he was always honest. "So if Tony would have given it to you, it would only contain sketches of him?"

"No."

"Why am I the only one in this book?" She asked again.

He took a deep breath. "Because you're so beautiful, Natasha. I can't stop drawing you. You're so perfect and...and I want to bring that down on paper. I think about you a lot. Truth is I think about you all the time."

She was hardly perfect or beautiful. She knew she had a pretty face but her insides were ugly and tainted with all the blood she had spilled. "No, please don't say something like that."

"Why not? It's the truth. That's how I see you!" He walked over to her and took the book out of her hands. "Do you not know how amazing you are? How happy I am that you are in my life, Nat? How dancing with you for two hours every week is the highlight of my week? That I signed us up for those classes because I was scared I would do something dumb like try to kiss you if we were alone?"

She didn't know how to process all of this. No one had ever said such lovely things to her and the worst part was that she wanted him to keep talking because she liked hearing those things from him.

"Don't you know that you're my favorite person?" Steve smiled at her shyly.

Oh boy, she was sure that if she tried to get up from the sofa in that moment her knees would give away and she would fall. "I...I don't know what to do, Steve."

He nodded. "It's okay. I probably just unloaded a lot on you. You don't have to say anything. Just think about what I just said, okay?"

"Okay."

"Do you still wanna go to that food festival?"

She didn't think she could spend time with Steve right now. She was way too confused. She shook her head and Steve didn't seem mad. She left his apartment and took the subway. She was so deep in her thoughts that she missed her stop and had to walk back to her apartment. She was glad that Clint and Bobbi had made up a few days ago and she had her place to herself again. She wanted to be alone.

So Steve had feelings for her. He thought she was beautiful and perfect. Considered her his favorite person. Did that mean he was in love with her? Or about to fall in love with her? God, no one prepared her for something like this! She spoke seven languages, knew how to kill someone using only a paperclip and was educated in history and arts but no one in the Red Room thought it had been necessary to teach her how to deal with something like that! She tried to watch some TV to distract herself but that didn't work. She flicked through the magazines on her coffee table but nothing caught her attention. Did she like Steve? He was her friend and the one she trusted the most besides Clint. She knew that she found him good looking but his mind and intellect were so much more attractive than his handsome face and hot body. And he smelled really nice. Wow, Natasha really? He smelled really nice? Would she like it if Steve would call some else his favorite person? The answer was a strong no. Who was her favorite person? Clint? No, she sometimes had to fight the urge to kill him with his own arrows. Steve never annoyed her. She liked spending time with him, she always felt so good when he smiled because of her. His smile was so beautiful and the way his whole face lit up when he smiled took her breath away. She was...She was a complete idiot. She grabbed her keys and phone and hailed a cab to get to Brooklyn. She hoped he was home and didn't go to the food market on his own.

A woman with a stroller opened the front door and Natasha held it open for her and then went into the building. She ran up the stairs and knocked on Steve's door. She waited a few minutes but no one opened. She wanted to call him but her phone died. Great, just fucking great! Should she wait here? Knock again? Maybe he was taking a shower or napping.

"Natasha?"

She turned around and Steve was standing in the hallway. She took a deep breath and ran to him. Steve's face was a mix between confusion and hope and she cupped his face when she reached him and pressed her lips on his. Steve smiled into the kiss and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"You're my favorite person, too." She confessed after she had to break the kiss because her lungs started to burn.

He was beaming at her and her heart was racing. "Yeah?"

She nodded and he rested his forehead against hers. "You wanna get some ice cream?

"Yes." She took his hand and laced their fingers together.

It looked like she would have to say yes next week when Agnes would ask her again if Steve was finally her boyfriend.


	25. Natasha wants a date

_Natasha wants to date Steve and tries everything to get him to ask her out._

* * *

Natasha always got what she wanted. It always had been this way and she always knew how to get her way. But then she set her eyes on Steve and everything changed. She wanted him and tried lots of things to get him but nothing worked. She wanted Steve to take her on nice dates and sent him pretty much everyday signals but he just didn't ask her! Yes, she knew that she could just ask him herself but just once in her life she wanted that the cute and nice boy asked her out. But he didn't and she tried everything!

She asked him to help her move furniture because men loved to think that they were needed by women and of course he helped her because Steve was a kind man but he didn't ask her out. And when she arched her back sexily off the couch he just asked her if her back hurt!

She made sure to wear lots of cute summer dresses around him and she did catch him looking at her legs but he didn't ask if they wanted to go on a date. She made sure to smile at him a lot and play with her hair when he was around but Steve didn't seem to get her signals.

She dragged him onto the dance floor when the whole gang went to one of Tony's clubs but as it turned out he was a bad dancer and only whipped on his feet. And he looked down right scared when he saw how the others were grinding their bodies at each other. But he did grab her waist and spun her around when another guy tried to dance with her, so that was something.

She asked Steve to draw her which he immediately agreed to (it almost seemed like he wanted to do that for ages) and she posed a whole afternoon for him and the drawing was truly amazing and she thought there was a moment where he would ask her out but no of course he didn't.

Really what did a girl around here had to do to get ask on a fucking date? She wanted the whole dating experience with the guy picking her up, dinner and movie, walking through Central Park, she wanted to get walked to her door and then get a good night kiss. And she wanted Steve to be the one who would take her on first real date. Truth was she never really was on one and she only realized that she wanted a real date when she noticed that she had feelings for Steve.

He should feel fucking honored that she admitted to herself that she felt more for him than friendship! And the thing was she knew that Steve liked her too. She knew how to read people and the signs were all there! Yet he didn't do anything! Why?

Her next plan had been to top it up a notch and try to appeal to his visual senses more. She knew that Steve came to the roof of the tower frequently when the weather was good to draw. So she chose a bikini that showed off her body and he did stare at her when he saw her and clearly liked what he saw but he didn't ask her out nor did he put sun screen on her back when she sweetly asked him to. He just stumbled something out about having to meet Tony and practically ran away. Great! Okay maybe that was a bit too much for him. He did come from a different era where women weren't so forward.

She was so desperate that she actually asked Clint for advice but all he could come up with was that she should break into his place and wait for him naked in his bed. That would probably end in sex and she wanted to go on a few romantic dates before that happened. Well, it was more likely that Steve would run away than join her in his bed. And she wasn't that desperate yet to try Clint's idea.

She didn't had the time to think about ways to get Steve to give her what she wanted because Fury needed her for a mission. She told Clint her location like they always did to get the other one out if they needed evac and she left the tower in the early morning when it was still dark outside. She thought about saying goodbye to Steve but decided against it. She practically threw herself against him in the last weeks and he probably needed a break from her. She infiltrated a human trafficking ring in Singapore in the next two weeks and helped bring them down. It felt good to get the people out of their clutches and she was proud of herself. She took a regular flight back to New York and kept looking for Clint at the airport because he promised to pick her up but the dude didn't show up. She groaned and rolled her trolley to the exit. Looked like she had to take a cab to the Tower. She was about to walk to one of the waiting cabs when a hand suddenly covered her own on the handle of her trolley. Did someone really try to take it away from her? She wanted to ram her elbow into the thief's chest but he caught it. Surprised she looked around and Steve was behind her.

He pointed at her ears. Right, she had headphones on. She pulled them off her head.

"Hey, Nat. I've been calling your name for quite some time now." He laughed. "I thought you were ignoring me."

"Sorry!" She let him take her suitcase.

"Barton couldn't make it so he sent me to pick you up. I hope that's okay."

"Of course."

They walked to the airport parking lot where one of Tony's SUV was waiting for them. She expected Happy to be sitting in the driver seat but no Steve drove himself and she had to smile to herself. She didn't know why that made her so happy. He told her on the drive to the Tower what happened in the last two weeks and apparently Tony and Bruce burned the lab down. She couldn't say she was surprised by that. Steve stopped at a drive-thru because he insisted that she needed something to eat and she could barely keep her eyes open while she ate her muffin in the passenger seat.

"Nat?"

She blinked her eyes open. Did she fall asleep? "Huh?"

"We're here."

"Okay." She stumbled out of the car. The long mission, the flight and the jet lag were taking their toll on her body. She leaned against the elevator wall and barely noticed how JARVIS welcomed her back. She also didn't really notice how Steve picked her up and carried her to her bedroom. Did he really kiss her forehead before he left or was that already a part of her dream?

She didn't see Steve in the next days because he'd gone after a lead on Barnes. Murdock needed her help with something and she ended up going on a fake date with some rich guy who had ties to the Russian mob. She hated the irony of it, she wanted for months to go on a date and here she was on one with some gross dude who didn't even try to hide how he hoped the night would end. As if she would let that slimy guy get under her dress. Murdock got what he needed and she left the restaurant but not before she poisoned the guy's drink. He sold young girls into sex slavery so it wasn't like he didn't deserve what was coming for him. She took her high heels off when she got into the elevator and told JARVIS to take her to the common floor. She wasn't tired yet and wanted to play one of Tony's video games. Steve was in the common kitchen drinking a smoothie when she walked in.

"Hey! I didn't think you were already back. Any leads on your friend?"

He shook his head. "No. But what else is new."

"You'll find him. I know you will."

He gave her a small smile. "Thank you. I think I needed to hear that."

She smiled back because she always had to when he was around.

"Did you go out?" He pointed at her dress. "You look great by the way. I mean you always do."

"Thanks. Someone needed a distraction."

"I'm sure it worked!" His eyes wandered over her body. This is the time to ask me out, Rogers! But of course he didn't and she huffed. "You okay?"

She wanted to yell at him but didn't. She did have some dignity after all. "Yup." She said instead and left to get to living room to play some video games. Steve sat down next to her when she saving a princess from an evil troll. She threw a controller into his lap and changed the game to Mario Kart. She leaned to the side every time there was a turn in the road and one turn was especially sharp and she leaned into it again but lost her balance and landed with her face in Steve's lap. Fucking fantastic! She would download every virus into JARVIS framework if he didn't delete the security footage of that. Steve froze and she wished she somehow learned the ability to teleport. She had to put her hand on his knee to get her face out off his crotch.

"Sorry!" She never had been so embarrassed in her life before.

Steve's face was only a few inches away from her. When did that happen? "It's okay." Then he closed the gap between them and brushed his lips against hers. Her brain stopped working and her lips automatically moved against his. She should have fallen with her face into his lap ages ago! Steve broke the kiss first and caressed her cheek with his thumb. She still had her eyes closed and when she opened them he was smiling at her. And then she did something she really didn't think she would do after they finally kissed. She freaked out, jumped up, threw the controller against Steve's chest and bolted out of the room. She was this close to Steve hopefully asking her out and she ran away? What the fuck was wrong with her?

She quickly ran to her floor and got out of her dress and jumped in the shower. Would Steve have asked her out and she blew it by running away? Did he just want to kiss her and nothing more? No, she was sure he liked her too. She got into a hoodie and yoga pants after her shower and didn't bother to dry her hair. She had to fix this before Steve would lose his interest in her. She ran away because she was scared that it would now get serious between them, didn't she? Maybe that was the reason he didn't ask her on a date? She realized that she could probably asked herself a thousand questions or she could confront herself and Steve. She walked back to the common floor but Steve was gone.

"JARVIS, where's Steve?"

"On his floor, Agent Romanoff."

She took the elevator to get to Steve's floor and rang the door bell and prayed he would open the door for her. There was a chance that he was mad at her and didn't want to see her.

But Steve did open the door.

"Hey. Can I come in?"

"Sure." He stepped aside and she let herself in.

"I'm sorry for earlier."

"For the kiss or running away?"

"For running away." She sighed and looked up at him. He didn't look mad more confused. "Why aren't you asking me out?"

"Because you told me when I started at SHIELD that you don't date. You said you don't date at all. And I don't want anything casual with you. I want to take you on dates and hold your hand and plan a future with you but you made it perfectly clear back than that you weren't interested in those things. I'm sorry I kissed you. I got weak."

She stared at him with wide eyes. She did say that to him when she tried to find girls for him and he asked her why she never went on any dates. Back than she meant it but not anymore. "I changed my opinion on that topic because of you."

"Yeah?"

She nodded and Steve smiled at her. "I know it's late but there is this diner that makes the best apple pies in the whole city and they're still open. You wanna go there now?" He brushed her hair behind her ear. "I don't think I can't wait until tomorrow to ask you out and take you on a date."

"I'd love to go there with you." She remembered that she was still in a hoodie and yoga pants. "I should probably change first."

"You don't have to. You look beautiful in everything."

She smiled and Steve got a kiss for that statement.

Her first real date was sharing an apple pie with Captain America in a 50s themed diner and it was perfect. Steve walked her to her door and gave her a goodnight kiss and asked her to take a tour with him on his bike tomorrow.


	26. The Bet

_Bucky and Sam bet on who gets Steve and Natasha get together first._

* * *

Bucky was more than grateful that the Avengers took him in and helped him clear his mind and gave him a chance at redemption. He really was but he really didn't need to get chased by Natasha Romanoff through the woods as a training exercise. He really didn't! That tiny woman was fast, ruthless and sneaky as hell and every time he thought he shook her off, she jumped down a tree onto his back or hit him with paintball bullets. How did she do that? Wasn't he supposed the best at what he was doing? He was tired and sweaty when Natasha finally called it while she still looked good with only a light shine of sweat on her skin that made her actually glow. Natasha smirked at him clearly pleased with herself that she almost killed him and they joined the others in the gym where Steve had Sam, Wanda and Rhodey climbing up a wall while timing them.

As always Steve's face lit up when Natasha entered a room he was in and Bucky tried his best not to roll his eyes. Not that Steve ever admitted to him that he had the hots for Romanoff but everyone with eyes could see it. Steve was still watching Natasha when Sam complained that he reached the top of the wall and Steve didn't stop the time or he even looked. Wilson needed a lot of reassurance from Steve, he was insecure like that. But he did grin when he saw what or rather who got Steve's attention. Natasha seemed oblivious to it even though Bucky was pretty sure that it was just a farce and she knew exactly how Steve looked at her.

Natasha pulled her hoodie over her head revealing a sports bra and announced that she would hit the showers. Steve looked like he wanted to join her but of course he was too shy to do anything. The punk jumped out of planes without a parachute but couldn't ask out the girl he wanted.

Steve ended the training exercise and left the gym with Wanda and Rhodey in tow. Only Sam was still here, great. Bucky walked to the glass fridge in the gym and got a water bottle out. After that training he needed to get hydrated. He really wondered sometimes if Romanoff was trying to kill him.

Sam walked over to him. "How was the training from hell with Nat?"

"I'm still alive. For now."

He chuckled. "Yeah. First time she did that to me, I laid down on the floor and waited for the sweet embrace of death. But it didn't come and she chased me another round through the woods as punishment."

Bucky had to laughed. That did sound a lot like something Natasha would do. But than again torturing Sam was definitely something he could get behind.

Sam was complaining again. "I can't believe Cap missed how fast I climbed up that wall. It was practically in super speed."

"He had something more interesting to watch. Or should I say someone."

Sam grinned at him. "So you noticed it too?"

"I don't think there is anyone here at HQ who hasn't notice it yet." Really, Steve had constantly hearteyes when Natasha was around.

"I feel like as his literal wingman I should give them a little push!" Sam said and took a water bottle out of the fridge.

What did Sam have to do with that? If anything, _he_ should give them a little push. He was Steve's best friend for almost a century and had tried to find him a girlfriend before. "I think that's my job."

Sam smirked. "Please, Steve told me about your unsuccessful tries to score him a date. It's my turn!"

He would rather rejoin HYDRA than have Sam get Steve and Natasha get together. "No. I'll do it. I know what the dames want."

Sam snorted. "If you really did that, then you knew that they don't want to be called dames!"

"It's more respectful than chicks." He got an idea. "Why don't we both try to get them together and see who has more success."

"You mean a bet?" Sam's eyes were lighting up.

"Yeah."

"Okay. One week to get them at least to kiss." Sam held his hand out.

He took it. "Okay. Winner gets to decide what the loser has to do."

Sam smirked. "Oh, I'll come up with something, hobo. Don't worry."

"Like you're going to win, birdbrain!"

* * *

Wanda's 21 birthday was the next day and she convinced Steve to let the whole team to go to a bar in the next town to celebrate. Even Hill came with them. Fury stayed at the base but did give Wanda a present. But Stark topped Fury's gift, well he topped everyone's gift because he sent her a fucking horse. Bucky thought a bar was the perfect place for Steve and Natasha to get close. Maybe they would even make out and he would win the bet today. He took the flask with Asgardian mead that that alien guy Thor left for Steve to make sure that Steve would be a little bit more loose than he usually was.

Natasha was with Wanda at the bar helping her to decide which would be the first drink she would ever order and Bucky caught Steve admiring Natasha's backside. She wore tight leather pants and a top (he thought they were called bodies) that basically showed off her whole back. Could Natasha even wear a bra underneath it? Wait, that wasn't any of his business. He also noticed that Steve was not the only one who had his eyes on her. Several men and a few women seemed captivated by Natasha. Not that he could blame them. If Steve wasn't head over heel for her and Bucky hadn't shot her twice, he would have definitely tried to see if he had a chance with her.

Natasha and Wanda came back with a pink drink for the birthday girl and Natasha carried a tray of shots. Everyone took one and they congratulated Wanda again. Sam and Rhodey shared a few funny anecdotes about their 21st birthdays until Wanda dragged Natasha and Hill on the dance floor to dance with her. Bucky took the chance while Steve's eyes were clued on Natasha to pour a bit of the Asgardian mead into his bourbon. He hoped that would make Steve join Natasha on the dance floor. Hill came back to their table after a few songs but Wanda and Natasha clearly had some fun and jumped on the bar to dance there. People were cheering and Steve couldn't take his eyes off Natasha. Bucky was really impressed that she didn't slip off the bar with her high heels, Wanda's feet seemed more secure with her flats.

Steve finished his bourbon and ordered another one obviously unhappy with the all the attention Natasha got from her mostly male audience. Bucky decided that Steve could use a little bit more of courage and poured a big gulp of mead into his drink. Hill saw it and raised an eyebrow but he shook his head and she thankfully didn't say anything. Wanda and Natasha left their adoring fans and came back to their table. The birthday girl was smiling from ear to ear and looked for the first time today actually happy. Right, she was a twin and she missed her brother on their birthday. Natasha took another shot and Wanda managed to convince Sam and Rhodey to dance with her.

Natasha sat down next to Steve. "How are you enjoying yourself? I know it's past your bedtime.

He rolled his eyes and Bucky tried not to laugh, Steve would have probably reminded him that he was a year older than him. "Hilarious, Nat. I'm sure I'm not enjoying myself as much as you do."

That sounded kinda bitter and Natasha raised an eyebrow. A guy came towards them and asked Hill if he could buy her a drink. She said yes and excused herself to go with the guy. A few minutes later another man showed up at their table and asked Natasha to dance with him. Before she could answer Steve gulped his bourbon down, stood up, grabbed Natasha's hand and dragged her to the dance floor. Bucky wouldn't believe what was happening if he didn't see it with his own two eyes. Steve pulled Natasha with her back against his chest, placed his hands on her waist and moved to the beat of the music. And he wasn't that bad at moving his body to the music. Natasha seemed surprised but then covered his hands with her own and moved with him. Bucky should really take a picture of this, there was no way anyone would believe him. He scanned the room and saw that Hill was watching them and she looked practically shocked. Good, he had at least one witness. He looked for Sam in the crowd and found him staring at Steve and Nat who were now basically grinding at each other. Holy shit, how much Asgardian mead did it put into Stevie's drink? Sam looked at him and he raised the flask with a smirk and Sam clenched his jaw. Looked like he would win that bet tonight. Oh, the things he could make Sam do as punishment...

Natasha leaned her on Steve's shoulder and looked up at him. He looked down and it appeared that he lowered his head. _Yes Stevie, kiss her! Come on, I know you want to!_ He leaned in closer and Bucky could already smell his victory when Steve suddenly pulled his head back, quickly walked away leaving Natasha on the dance floor alone and came back to the table. What the fuck was he doing? Natasha looked confused and a little bit hurt before she controlled her facial expressions and went to join Wanda's little dance party.

"What the fuck, punk!" He yelled when Steve was back at the table.

"What?"

"I saw you two dancing. Why didn't you go in for the kiss?"

Steve blushed and Bucky realized that he thought that no one saw what happened. "Not like this." He whispered and the music almost drowned his words. "I don't want it to happen here."

Okay, he could understand that. Steve was romantic and kissing his dream girl for the first time on a full dance floor was probably not how he imagined it.

* * *

Natasha seemed to be mad at Steve , not that Bucky could blame her, and kept her distance in the next two days. But there was a tactical training exercise organized by a military contractor and the whole team flew to Manhattan to do it. They chose someone outside the Avengers circle so they would have no clue what would expect them. The guy was someone Sam knew from his army days and his firm had a good reputation and his guys didn't make a big fuss over the Avengers being there.

He had to hand it to Anvil the training op felt real and they got to try some new things in the "field" without fearing getting someone killed. The whole thing took almost a whole day and they were all exhausted after the last scenario. Bucky couldn't wait to get back to the Tower to lay down on a flat surface and watch some TV.

Sam left to say hi to his old friend and came back with him in tow. Sam made a beeline for Natasha who was sitting on a table and eating a cookie. "Nat!" Sam waved at her and oh no, Bucky had a clue what he was gonna do because he could see now that his friend was really handsome. "That's my friend Billy. Billy Russo. He owns the place." Sam was trying to make Steve jealous with this Russo guy. He looked over to Steve who was talking to Rhodey and hadn't noticed yet what was happening.

Natasha jumped off the table. "Nice to meet you. Your guys know what they're doing." She shook Russo's offered hand.

"Thank you!" He smiled at her with perfect white teeth and Bucky could see that Russo was clearly interested in Natasha. Fuck! "To be honest we were all freaking out a little bit when we realized who exactly hired us."

He zoned their conversation out because he was telepathically trying to reach Steve so he would turn his fucking back around. He didn't want Sam to win the bet but he also didn't want that Russo guy to score a date with Natasha. _Steve, someone is about to hit on your girl!_ Should he go over and interrupt? No, he and Sam both agreed not to intervene with the other one's plans. _Steve! Turn your fucking back around! Natasha just laughed at something that guy said. Steve!_

He didn't think he sent his thoughts to Steve but he did turn around eventually and clenched his jaw when he saw Russo and Natasha talking. He raised his shoulders and walked over to them in his Captain America mode. Good, Steve wanted to intimidate the man.

But it didn't seem to work because Natasha agreed to meet Russo later for drinks. Steve almost looked heartbroken and didn't say anything on their way back to the tower. Sam looked guilty and Bucky had the suspicion that he didn't think Natasha and Russo would go out. Had the bet been a stupid idea? The last thing he wanted to do was to cause his best friend pain.

Steve left to hit the gym while Natasha excused herself to get ready for her date with Russo. Bucky had the feeling she only said yes because she was still hurt that Steve didn't kiss her on Wanda's birthday. He had talked earlier to Sam and they both agreed to drop the bet because they didn't want to mess with their friends' feelings. It wasn't okay.

Steve was still in the gym when Bucky went to the floor they shared when they were in Manhattan. Around midnight he heard Steve roaming around the apartment and he thought about going to him to let him talk about what was bothering him but before he could get out of bed he heard how the front door of closed and then nothing. Where did Steve go? Did he go back to the gym?

"Jarvis?"

"Yes, Sergeant Barnes?"

"Do you know where Steve's going?"

"I believe he left to pick up Miss Romanoff."

 _Interesting._

He tried to stay away to wait for Steve's return but he was too tired and fell asleep. He woke up around ten a.m and Steve wasn't in the apartment but Bucky wasn't surprised since Steve was an earlier riser. He wanted to take the elevator to get to the common floor to see what kind of breakfast he would have. He pushed the button and waited but the elevator didn't come. Weird. The display showed that the elevator was coming up and then it was going down. Was the elevator broken?

He pressed on "surveillance feed" on the touchscreen and it showed him the inside of the elevator. His eyes almost fell out of their sockets. Natasha and Steve were occupying the elevator and making out like there was no tomorrow. Natasha was pressed against the elevator buttons and Steve's roaming hands on her back kept pushing them explaining why the elevator kept changing its direction.

Boy, was Bucky happy that he and Sam dropped their bet because Sam would have made him suffer.

* * *

 _Thank you so much for your reviews, guys! Keep'em coming:)_


	27. Age is just a number

_Steve thinks Natasha is lying about her age and older than she says she is._

* * *

"When were you born?" Steve asked Natasha after they were done with their training in the gym of the Avengers facility.

She was drinking water with her back to him and turned around. He watched her face carefully trying to find out if her facial expressions would confirm his theory. She put her water bottle down. "1984."

Her face didn't betray her but Steve was sure that she just lied to him. He had this theory that he wasn't the only one on the team who didn't look their real age.

"How old are you?"

"Don't you know that you're not supposed to ask a woman that?" She gave him her signature half-smirk."You're also not allowed to ask how much a woman weighs or if she came after an underwhelming round of sex."

He knew that she added the last part to make him flustered and to distract him from his original question. Yes, he did think about sex with Natasha, definitely more than he should but that was not what this was about. And the fact that she just made a sex joke strengthened his theory that she was lying about her age.

"How old are you?"

"I just told you my birth year, can't you do the math?"

"You know that you have not one single wrinkle for being 33 years old? Not one." He had really good eyes thanks to the serum and her skin showed no sign of aging. Normally women in her age had fine wrinkles around their eyes and on their forehead but there was nothing. She didn't look a day over 25 if he had to guess an age.

"Botox." She replied coolly. "And a really expensive anti-aging cream."

He just knew that she was laying. He'd seen the photos SHIELD took of her before Clint was sent to kill her. She looked exactly the same and those photos were over ten years old. Not even botox could do that and she could still move her facial muscles.

Natasha left the gym without saying another word. Not that he thought that she would immediately admit to him that she was older than she claimed. Why would she? Her passport and files said that she was born in 1984 but those could easily be faked. Zola did say at Camp Lehigh that she was born in the eighties but the scientist only knew what had been on the SHIELD and HYDRA servers and someone could have fed them wrong intel. Someone like Fury. If anyone knew how old she really was it had to be Fury. And Clint. Those two definitely knew her real age. But Clint wouldn't tell him the truth out of loyalty to Natasha and Fury wouldn't tell him because he loved to have the upper hand. Some people collected baseball cards, Fury collected secrets.

The thing was he itched to know if he was really the only one on their team who didn't age. He suspected for some time now that the Red Room gave her a serum similar to his. Natasha did things that a normal person shouldn't be able to do. She could keep up with him in training and during their morning jogs she sometimes raced him and was almost as fast as him and that should have been impossible for her. Except if she was enhanced herself.

He liked the idea that Natasha could be by his side for a long time. All the people he had found in the last years would sooner or later die of age. He wouldn't, the serum coursing through his veins made sure of that. There had always been this theory and Dr. Cho confirmed it after some tests, he wouldn't age for a really long time (maybe even never). He would have never gotten to grow old with Peggy if he didn't went under. So he liked the idea that Natasha would stay as youthful as he did and maybe they could stay together. Did he need any more proof that they were meant to be?

He had no idea how he could find out her real age if she didn't tell him herself. He wasn't as sneaky as her and she had the ability to see right through him especially now that she knew that he was onto her.

The DoD asked him to visit soldiers overseas and he spent the next four weeks in the Middle East being reminded of his time with the Hollowing Commando. He missed them and he missed Natasha. They hadn't been apart that long since they moved into the facility and he got used to seeing her beautiful face everyday. When he came back Natasha wasn't there and Sam could only tell him that she had to deal with something personal. He didn't know where she was and he had no way of reaching her because she left her phone at the base and he had no clue how to contact her the way Clint did. So he had to wait here and hope that she was okay. He used the time to train Wanda, Sam, Rhodey and Vision and got them more in sync during Natasha's absence. He hoped she would be proud of him when she came back.

They had a small mission in Toronto that went well and two weeks later Natasha was back without saying where she had been or what she had done. He really shouldn't be surprised by now that she practically never shared anything about herself. She didn't seem different so he figured that whatever she did in the last two weeks went well for her.

He was surprised that she showed up at his door when he was about to go to bed.

"Everything okay?" He was a bit concerned because she had never done this before.

She went for his couch and sat down. "Remember when you asked me a few weeks ago when I was born?"

"Yeah." He sat down next to her but left enough space between them so she wouldn't feel crowded. Was she going to tell him the truth?

"I don't know when I was born. Fury gave me that birthday. November 22nd was when Clint spared my life and Fury chose a year." She stared at the wall behind him. "I went to Russia to find my birth certificate but couldn't find anything. All I know is that I was born in Stalingrad."

Volgograd had been called Stalingrad until 1961, did that mean he was right? "Natasha?"

"You were right about me. I don't really know exactly how old I am but I'm older than 33. Way older. If memory serves right than I'm at least in my seventies, maybe even in my eighties." She brushed her hands over her body. "Don't I look great for my age?"

"Why didn't you tell me?" He asked softly.

She smiled but it didn't reach her eyes. "I did horrible things most of my life. I have four or five decades of murder and mayhem under my belt. Not really something you wanna confess to Captain America."

He reached for her hand and he was pleased that she let him hold it. "I know that it wasn't your choice, Nat. It doesn't matter what you did. When you did have a choice you turned your life around and now you're helping people and that's what matters."

"You really believe that?"

He smiled. "I know that."

She had the same look on her face she had when they had been in Sam's guestroom and he told her that he trusted her. It broke his heart a little bit that she seemed to be amazed when people said positive things about her.

She turned the TV on and they ended up watching Golden Girls. She pointed at the screen. "I should look like that by now."

"So should I." He laughed and felt good that he wasn't the only one who would stay young for a long time. Everything was so much easier with Nat by his side. "I hope you know that means you can't make any fossil jokes about me anymore!"

She grinned at him. "I'm still younger than you. I know that for sure."

He rolled his eyes at her. He only noticed now that they were still holdings hands but Natasha didn't seem to mind and he didn't let go off her hand.

"When we do look like them-" She wasn't looking at him but at the TV. "You're gonna move with me to Florida to enjoy retirement?"

His heart was beating faster because of what she just said her. It could take decades until they both looked their real age and she thought they would still be in each other's life? "Yes. I'd go anywhere with you."

She kept looking at the screen but he saw her smile and gave his hand a squeeze. He just knew they were meant to be and they had all the time in the world to end up together. And somehow he knew they would.


	28. It's a small world (AU)

**_Widow Witch, I was already working on this one shot and changed a few things and I hope you like it._**

 _AU: Steve has his first one night stand and wakes up alone the next morning. He thinks he'll never see Natasha again until his mom introduces him to her new boyfriend Nick Fury and his daughter._

* * *

Steve had never done this before. He never had sex before with a woman he just met a few hours ago but he was immediately attracted to Natasha and her fierce spirit. He couldn't believe his luck when this incredibly beautiful woman walked up to him and Bucky and actually flirted with him and not his best friend. Steve didn't even want to come to this new bar and Bucky practically had to drag him out of his apartment but he was so glad that he went with him in the end. Natasha was gorgeous, smart and had a dry humor he found incredibly attractive. He couldn't say no when she asked him if he wanted to get out of here and they ended up at his place. And thankful he was that Bucky gave him as a joke a box of condoms and Natasha didn't notice that he hadn't had sex in a very long time. His last relationship ended years ago and he was terrible when it came to women (even Bucky gave up on trying to set him up with his female friends). But then there was Natasha and the night they spent together was truly amazing.

He woke up with a smile on his face and turned around to see if Natasha was already awake. He could make her breakfast and maybe she had time to take a walk so they could get to know each other better. He was already smitten and he wanted to know everything about her. But the space next to him was empty. Maybe she was already up. The sheets were cold when he touched them, maybe she took a shower and was making breakfast now. He got out of bed, slipped a new pair of briefs on and walked to the kitchen. No beautiful redhead. He checked the bathroom and she wasn't there. He looked for her dress that he had gotten her out of in his living room last night but it wasn't on the couch anymore. Natasha left. He checked his apartment for any notes but she didn't leave any. She left and he had no number, no nothing. He didn't even know her last name. God, he was such an idiot. He thought that last night was the beginning of something and she just wanted sex. And this was New York City, he would probably never see her again.

Bucky, of course, was proud of him for having an one night stand (he slept with her not thinking it would be one) and said that he should feel good having slept with such a beautiful woman. And that it was time for him to finally get laid again (Buck might had a point there, he almost forgot how great sex was). And that it wasn't such a big of deal and people had meaningless sex all the time.

The thing was that it wasn't meaningless to Steve. He felt a connection to her right from the start and thought their night together proved it. He was so sure that she was a girl he could fall in love with but she only used him for sex. Because that's how he felt. He felt used. He would have never slept with her if he knew that she just wanted sex with him. Sex meant something to him and he only slept with her because he never felt so much for someone he barely knew before. He really thought they were at the beginning of a relationship.

His phone vibrated and got him out of his thoughts about Natasha. He checked the screen and it was his mother reminding him that he would meet her new boyfriend Nick this weekend. At least his ma had found someone to share her life with.

* * *

Steve showed up his mother's door stepp at exact one p.m on Sunday in his blue dress shirt and grey slacks (Ma said that they would go to a Broadway show later) and with flowers for his mother.

She opened the door with a bright smile and gave him a warm hug. He loved his mother very much. After his father's sudden death when Steve was still a baby it had always been just the two of them. His mother was all he had and he wanted the best for her. He hoped that Nick Fury could give that to her or they would have a problem. Sarah Rogers deserved the world and Steve would make sure she would get it. She had always supported him, he had her support when he joined the army and then later when he went to art school and tried to find a job as an illustrator. She always believed in him and she was the first he called when he landed a job at the New Yorker. Since then his career went smoothly and he made enough money for him (and his mother in case she needed special care later).

"Steven!" She kissed his cheek before she let go of his embrace and then tugged on his hair. He had let it grown out a bit and grew a beard." You look like a lumberjack, dear. How are you, sweetheart?"

"Good. I'm good. And you?"

"Everything's great!" She smiled again and he could see that this Nick guy made her happy. She looked up at him because Sarah Rogers was a petite woman with a beautiful and kind face and her hair was still blonde even though she was already in her sixties. "Have you met someone?" She asked innocently.

He had been hearing this question now for at least three years now. And his answer was always no. His ma already asked him if he was gay and that she knew this really cute guy from her yoga class who was in Steve's age. He told her that he wasn't gay but she didn't look like she immediately believed him. This time he had met someone but that was apparently a night of meaningless sex (a lot of it to be honest) but he would never tell his mother about that. "No, I haven't met someone."

She took the flowers out of his hands and thanked him. He followed her into the kitchen. "You know that Nick has a daughter? Two years younger than you and really, really beautiful."

Oh no, would his mother really try to set him up with her boyfriend's daughter?

"She's coming to lunch, too."

Yes, she definitely would. God, he already felt sorry for him. And the woman.

Nicky Fury was a tall and impressive man who also served in the army and now owned a successful security firm. He seemed a bit grumpy and not very talkative but Steve could see that he adored his mother. His eyes (well more like eye, Fury lost one eye in combat) were full of love and they kept smiling at each other. So far Fury made a good first impression.

The doorbell rang. "Ah, that must be my kid. Always late, the little one." Fury laughed and got up when his mother wanted to get up. "I'll get it."

Fury left the dinning room and his mother raised an eyebrow. "Did he pass your test, sweetheart?"

He laughed. "Am I that transparent?"

She smirked at him. "No, darling. But I'm your mother and I know how protective you are."

"He seems nice. And he makes you happy. I can see it. That's all I want for you, ma."

She reached over the table and squeezed his hand. "That's all I want for you, too."

Fury came back and Steve heard the clicking of high heels on his mother's wooden floor. He was looking forward to meet his daughter because he figured they would see each other now from time to time. Fury moved to the side to reveal his daughter. Steve almost dropped his water glass. That was Natasha! What the fuck was she doing here?

Natasha stared at him with wide eyes and looked like she wanted to bolt. She probably thought she would never see him again.

"Steve, this is my daughter Natasha. Well, adoptive daughter. As you can see we're not blood related." Fury chuckled lightly. Fuck, so Natasha truly was his kid. He hoped that she was just dropping something off and would leave and wasn't Fury's daughter.

Natasha forced a smile and offered him her hand. "Nice to meet you, Steve. Your mother told me a lot about you."

So she was gonna pretend they didn't know each other? Fine. "Hi." He simply said and his mother gave him a funny look. She probably thought that he was being rude. Did Natasha know who he was when she hit on him?

Lunch was interesting to say the least. His mom's food was good as always but Natasha wouldn't look at him. She talked to his mom and her dad but not to him. Ma seemed to notice something because she kept looking between him and Natasha. What was he supposed to do? He couldn't tell her that one week ago they had sex and Natasha left in the middle of the night.

They took a cab to Broadway to watch a afternoon show of My Fair Lady, his mother's favorite musical. Fury saw someone he knew and left shortly to talk to them while Natasha excused herself to go to the ladies room.

"Are you always like this when you meet a beautiful woman?" His mother hissed to him while they looked for their seats.

"What?"

"No wonder, you're still single!" She sighed and sat down. "You barely look at her or talk to her. She's a nice girl, Steve. And single!"

She did sound like a nice girl except that she sneaked out after their night together. He learned from his mother and Fury that Natasha worked at Tony Stark's company as a manager (youngest one ever hired as Fury proudly pointed out) and gave dance lessons for underprivileged kids. She came originally from Russia and was adopted by Fury when she was seven and spoke four languages.

"Don't you like her, Steve?"

"I don't know her, Ma!" He hoped that was enough for her. He really didn't want to tell her the truth. _I don't really know her but I know that she has a beauty mark on her left breast._ Yeah, that wouldn't fly well.

Sarah Rogers smiled at him. "Well, I'm sure your paths will cross more often from now." She took his hand and gave it a squeeze. "You know, Nick told me that Natasha always had bad luck with guys. She's deserves someone nice and kind. Someone like you."

He tried his best not to snort. Maybe she wouldn't have bad luck with men if she didn't sneak out in the middle of the night! "She's your boyfriend's daughter. I don't think I should date her. It's weird."

She shrugged her shoulders. "I don't think so." Her eyes twinkled. "Just imagine how gorgeous your kids would be!"

"Mom!"

"Just kidding!"

Fury came back and took the seat next to his mother which meant that Natasha would have to sit next to him. Great! She came back a few minutes later and the look on her face told him that she wasn't happy with the seating either. She stared the whole show at the stage,was she really going to ignore him forever? Steve had the feeling that their parents were in it for the long haul and they were both in each other's life for good.

The show was over and Natasha looked ready to leave the first chance she got but her dad invited them to dinner and she was forced to spend more time with him. Again, she spoke mostly to her dad and his mother but she did seem interested when she learned that he was an artist and worked for the New Yorker.

She looked at him for the first time. "Did you make that sketch about Harvey Weinstein?"

He was actually shocked that she talked to him. "Um, yes. I did."

She nodded. "That was good. I liked it."

He didn't need to look at his mother to see that she was pleased. Probably thought that the ice was finally breaking. Before he could react his mother told Natasha that he would take her home and she left with Fury in a cab. _Thanks, mom._

Natasha walked away without looking at him. He ran after her. "Hey, where are you going?"

"Home?!" She looked annoyed.

"Didn't you hear my mother?"

She rolled her eyes. "You don't have to bring me home, Steve. I'm a big girl, I can get home on my own."

"New York at night is dangerous." He didn't want to spend more time with her but his mom expected him to get her home safely and that's what he was gonna do.

"I have a black belt in several martial arts. I think I will be fine." She turned around and began to walk away again and he grabbed her arm to turn her to face him. "What?" She snarled and they both stared at each other with heavy breaths. His gaze fell to her lips and when he looked up again her eyes were on his lips too. There is was again, this pull between them. They both went for the kiss at the same time and practically devoured each other's mouth in the middle of the pave walk.

He wasn't proud of it but he spent the night with her again. They didn't really talk to each other and ended up at her place because it was closer. He wasn't surprised that he was alone when he woke up the next morning. Natasha already left without any note. At least now he knew her full name and where she lived. And their parents were dating on top of that. He got back into his clothes, made her bed and left to get to work.

His mom sent him a text asking him if he got Natasha home safely. Well, he did. And than he had sex with her. Two times. Not that he would tell his mother that.

* * *

Two days later his mother called him to invite him over to a barbecue next Sunday. He just knew that Natasha was invited as well and he wondered if she'd show up knowing that he would be there. He had luck because apparently she was on a business trip and couldn't make it. Fury was there, Buck was too and a few other people Steve didn't know. He hadn't told Bucky that Natasha was Fury's daughter and he really thought that he could keep it a secret from him for some time but his hope was destroyed when Bucky came with two beers and a shit eating grin on his face to him.

"So." He handed him a beer. "This Coulson guy, Fury's co-worker, just showed me a picture of Fury's 65th birthday party. You know who was in that picture?"

He took a sip and didn't answer.

"So you know!" Bucky laughed. "Oh god, this is so funny. You had an one night stand with your mom's boyfriend's daughter!"

Was is still an one night stand?! Was it now a two night stand?! He didn't say anything and started at his feet.

"Stevie?" Bucky poked his thigh with his finger. "Did you have sex with your stepsister again?"

"Oh God, don't call her that!"

"You didn't say no!" He poked him again. "Did you two hook up again?"

What was the point in denying it? "Yes. Last Sunday after we spent the day with our parents."

Bucky laughed so hard he almost fell off the garden chair. His mother came asking them what was so funny and Bucky thankfully came up with a lie.

* * *

Steve wasn't proud of it but three days later Natasha showed up at his door late at night and he slept with her again. He knew that it wrong and that she was probably just using him but he couldn't say no to her. It was like she was pulling him into her and despite them not really talking about anything his attraction to her got only stronger. Of course the next morning she was gone and again he felt like a moron. And he wasn't proud of the fact that it happened eight more times in the next two weeks.

His mother met him after work because she wanted to buy a gift for Bucky's birthday and needed his input. Bucky had already told him that he could totally invite Natasha to his party.

They went to a record store to find something for Buck. "Why don't you take Natasha with you to James' party? Nick said that she barely has any friends. She has problems to connect with people. To open up."

No shit, he thought to himself. He already realized that Natasha only wanted sex from him and nothing more. The problem was that he wanted more from her. He wanted to take her to dinner, maybe get his bike out of the garage and drive up with her to the Hamptons. The sex was amazing but he wanted a real relationship but Natasha would probably stop sleeping with him if he told her that. And despite feeling used in the morning, he really liked sleeping with her. Yeah, he knew that made him a dick.

"Steve?"

"Huh?"

"Why don't I give you Nat's number so you can ask her if she wants to go to James' party?"

So his mom had her number and got to call her Nat. He was having sex with her and didn't have her number or called her Nat.

"Sure."

She smiled at him and found a record he knew Buck would love. She invited him to dinner and told him more about Natasha. She seemed to think that he didn't like her and tried to sell her to him. Natasha was left at a Russian Orphanage and lived there until Fury met her during a trip and adopted her. The kids made fun of her and she only had one friend named Clint who died in a car crash when Natasha was sixteen. She survived with a knee injury that ended her dancing career before it really started. She got married when she was 18 much to Fury's dismay and her husband turned out to be an asshole. He knew that his mother didn't tell him everything about that marriage but he could fill in the gaps. She only told him that Fury took care of it and he briefly wondered if Fury killed the guy. He felt bad for Natasha and for the first time he understood why she was the way she was. She was scared that she would get hurt. And he also knew that he couldn't sleep with her anymore after what he just learned about her. It didn't feel right after how her ex-husband had treated her.

His mom gave him Nat's number and he texted her the next morning explaining how he got her number and asking her if she wanted to go to Buck's party. To his surprise she said yes and asked him what she should get his best friend. He texted back that she didn't need to bring a gift (Bucky would probably be already over the moon if he saw who Steve showed up with).

 _Can I come over tonight?_

He sighed deeply. He knew what she meant by that and he was ashamed at how much he wanted to sleep with her. But he couldn't. He wanted her to know that she could trust him and that he liked more of her than just her body.

 _Not tonight._

She didn't text back and he wasn't surprised.

He wanted to pick her up so they could go together to Bucky's place but she said that she would meet him there. He was actually surprised that she still wanted to go because he turned down another booty calls. Maybe she did want more from him than sex. He was even more surprised that Natasha was already there when he came to Bucky's party. She was talking to Sam who seemed really into her and Steve clenched his jaw at the sight. He knew that she could flirt with anyone she wanted because they never said their thing was exclusive but it still bothered him that someone was hitting on her.

"Hey, punk!" Buck greeted him and thanked him for his gift. "And thank your mom again for her gift."

"I will."

Bucky grinned. "I talked to your friend again. She didn't remember me from the bar where she picked you up. Looked like she had only eyes for you."

Natasha nodded at him as a greeting but didn't come over to him. Hours passed and he still hadn't talk to her, he only saw her a few times talking to people. Bucky asked him to get more beer from the basement and two arms wrapped themselves around him from behind when he was downstairs.

"You wanna have some fun?" Natasha said huskily and slid one hand into his pants.

He grasped her wrist gently and pulled her hand out. "Not now."

She turned around and looked up at him. Even in her high heels, she was still so much smaller than him. "Don't you want me anymore?"

"Of course, I do."

"Then why do you turn down every chance at sex with me?" She looked angry. "What changed?"

He couldn't tell her the truth. He couldn't tell her what his mom had told him about her. "I..."

Her jaw was tight. "You know, don't you? You know my sad life story and now you don't want to fuck me anymore. Does it make you feel better that you stopped banging the poor girl who's screwed up? Do you want a medal for that?"

"What? No!"

She looked furious. "I don't want your pity! I just wanted your cock!"

"Jesus! That's not what this is about. I like you! I want more than sex!"

She laughed ugly and the sound made his stomach twist in knots. "Please, no man wants more than sex from me."

"I want to go on a real date with you,Nat-"

"Don't call me that!" She snarled and walked up the stairs.

"Natasha, please wait!"

She didn't and stormed up the rest of the stairs and shut the door behind her with a bang. She left the party and ignored his calls and texts. Did she only offer him sex and nothing more because she thought that was what he wanted from her?

He didn't know what to do. She didn't answer him when he called her and all his texts stayed unread. He could go to her place but that was intrusive. He didn't want to talk to Fury about Natasha because he feared that Fury would kill him. Everyone could see that Natasha was his everything. And he didn't want to talk to his mom about his relationship with Natasha or rather the lack of one.

He was surprised when his mother was waiting at his door with a basket of muffins after he came back from his run. "Hi." He kissed her cheek and let her in. "What are you doing here?"

"I made muffins and thought you wanted some."

He knew there was more to it but he needed a shower first. She had the coffee ready when he came back into the kitchen. "How was James' party?"

He almost choked on his coffee. "Good. He really liked your gift."

She nodded. "Have you heard from Natasha?"

"No." He answered truthfully.

"I have." The tone of her voice told him that she knew something was up. "She told me about you and her." She looked uncomfortable. "That you two were having... having a sexual relationship."

He grimaced. His mother had been a nurse and gave him the talk and told him to always make sure that the girl gave her consent and they never talked about sex again. She never asked and he never told her about his sex life.

"What did she tell you?"

"That you two knew each other before we introduced you because you...spent the night together and then continued to sleep together after you two met again." She eyed him. "Do you really just want sex from her?"

His eyes widened. "No! God, no!" God, it was so weird to talk to his mom about something like this. "I actually thought the night we met had been the start of something but she was gone the next morning."

"She thinks you only said you want to take her on a date because you know what happened to her. Out of pity."

"No!" He was probably talking way too loud. "That's not true! The truth is I'm falling in love with her. I think I do since the moment I first saw her. I want to be with her. Really be with her and not just sleep with her every couple of days."

His ma smiled at him. "Then you should tell her that."

"I'm trying! She won't answer her phone!" He was frustrated. He finally found someone and then everything got so complicated.

"Give her some time. She's been through a lot and doesn't trust easily. Do you want me to talk to her?"

God no. He wasn't a child anymore. He was still shocked that Natasha actually told his mom the truth. But then again, his mom was persistent. She told him to have patience and left after coffee.

He followed his mother's advice and stopped calling Natasha. He did send her one more text telling her that he would be there for her if she needed him. She didn't answer but he did saw that she at least now had read all his texts.

* * *

His ma and Fury left for a cruise and she asked him to look after her house while she was gone. He was just watering the plants in her garden when he heard a noise from the house. Was someone breaking in? In the middle of the day? He grabbed a shovel and walked carefully into the house. Something shattered and he heard curses. He put the shovel down because he recognized the voice and didn't want to scare her.

Natasha was kneeling on the kitchen floor picking up broken glass. She cut herself and cursed again.

"Hi." He stopped at the door frame.

Her eyes widened in shock. "Hi." She sucked on the wound on her finger and he went to the cupboard to get his mom's first aid kit out and pressed a bandage on her finger. "Thanks." She looked somehow embarrassed. "Your mom said I could borrow her cake tins. The kids from my dancing glass want to have a baking sale. I knocked a glass down while looking for them. I'm sorry."

"It's okay. It's just a glass." He got the dustpan and brush out of the pantry and cleaned up.

"Thanks. I could have done that."

He knew where his mom kept her cake tins and got them for Natasha. "Here."

"Thank you." She had the tins under her arm. "Um, bye."

"Wait!" He hadn't seen her in weeks and he missed her so much. "Can we talk? Please?"

She put the cake tins on the table. "Okay."

Wow, he actually expected her to just leave. "I meant it when I said that I wanted to date you. I wanted to ask you on a date since the moment I saw you."

"Really?"

"Yes! I was hurt when I woke up and you were gone. I thought...it had meant something for you,too."

"Then why did we only have sex and never talked about more?"

"Because I thought that sex was all you wanted from me. When you showed up at my mom's house you barely looked at me or spoke to me. And then we ended up in bed. I thought that's all you wanted. And I went with it because I like you so much. I thought I gave you what you wanted from me."

"I thought that, too." She closed her eyes. "I thought you were just playing me. At the bar and then later. You were so nice and so gentle with me and I was sure that it was all an act to get me into bed. No guy has treated me like that before. After my marriage...which was hell on earth...the men I met... they all just fucked me and then left. So this time I left before you could because I couldn't bare to see how you really were. And then you are suddenly sitting in Sarah's kitchen and I realize that the son she spoke so highly about was my hook up. And I was confused and conflicted because I knew I didn't deserve such a great and sweet guy. So I tried to ignore you but I couldn't resist you and slept with you again. The next morning I freaked out and left before you woke up." She opened her eyes again and stared at the kitchen table. "I tested you, Steve. I'm sorry for that. I kept sleeping with you ,well because sex with you is amazing." She gave him a small smile but it vanished quickly. "But I also wanted to see if you would ask me out or if we would do something that wasn't sex and I got so excited when you asked me to go with you to your friend's birthday. But I freaked out again and you probably realize by now that I have intimacy issues and that's why I wanted to meet you at your friend's place and not go together. And I wanted to have sex there because that's the only thing I know how to do. I don't know how to show affection. And when I realized that you knew about my past I snapped. I thought you just saw this broken and abused girl that you didn't want anymore. You only said those things out of pity for me."

"No, I didn't."

"I know that now."

"You really are a great and sweet guy." She picked the cake tins up again. "That's why this shouldn't go any further. I'm too fucked up for you. I don't know how a healthy relationship works. I never had one."

"Natasha, please. Don't just leave." She just stood there and he took that as his cue to keep talking. "Can we just try? Go on a date? It doesn't even have to be a date. Let's just do something together."

"Our parents are dating. I wouldn't be surprised if they got married." She raised an eyebrow. "We will probably be in each other life for a long time."

"I hope so."

She looked amazed by that. "You really mean that, don't you?"

"I do. And I'm always honest."

She chuckled lightly. "Okay, okay. I'll definitely need help to make all those cakes."

He smiled at her. "Good thing that I helped my ma as a kid when she baked."

"Can you come over later to help me?"

"Yeah. I'll be there at 5."

They made six cakes and shared a bottle of wine and for the first time they actually talked to each other about their lives and things they were passionate about. He stayed the whole evening and kissed her cheek before he left. They didn't have sex that night and they kept it that way the other times they met after that evening. They didn't even kiss on the lips but he thought it was the right path for them. They had to build a foundation and to get to know each other and Natasha seemed to agree because she made no move that indicated that she wanted to sleep with him.

They went to art galleries and museums together, tried new food, took a bus tour for tourists through Manhattan, she helped him pick out a new couch for his place and he took her to Coney Island where she kissed him when they were on top of the Ferris wheel. He took her home and she kissed him again before she disappeared behind her door. He was probably grinning like an idiot on his way back to Brooklyn.

His mother and Fury were back and invited them both for brunch to show them all the pictures they took during their cruise. They came separately and he didn't know how to act in front of their parents. Were they together now? Did she want people to know that they were seeing each other? Natasha was already there when he showed up and greeted him with a smile. His mother watched them with big interest during brunch but they sat opposite each other and Natasha asked mostly about their trip. But she did sit down next to him and put his arm over her shoulder when they were about to watch the photos of the cruise. His mother was beaming brightly at the sight while Fury raised his eyebrow and looked at his daughter. She nodded and Fury seemed okay with it. His mom had taken so many photos that they spent three hours on the couch watching them but he didn't care. He was so happy that Natasha wanted their parents to know that something was happening between them.

"If I see one more photo of a seagull, I'm gonna go crazy." He sighed after they left his mom's house and were walking together to the subway station.

"Yeah, your mom's really great but 493 photos of birds is a bit too much." Natasha agreed and then she took his hand and laced their fingers together. "Steve?"

"Yeah?" He was still staring at their hands.

"Do you wanna go to the Hamptons next weekend?"

"You wanna take photos of seagulls?"

She laughed. "No. I wanna take a trip with my boyfriend." Her voice got quieter. "That's what you are, right?"

"Well, I really wanna to be your boyfriend."

"Good." She smiled. "Then you're hired."

"Um, should we book two hotel rooms or-?"

"One. Just one."

"Are you sure?"

They reached the platform and she wrapped her arms around him. "Yes. Do you want to come to my place?"

"Yes."

They ordered Thai food and spent the night together. And when he woke up the next morning Natasha was still there wrapped in the blankets she stole from him during the night. And he honestly couldn't care less about the fact that she was a little blanket thief not when she smiled at him after she opened her eyes and kicked him out of bed after a few kisses to make her pancakes.

A year later his mother suggested a double wedding but he and Natasha said simultaneously no. They got married at the hotel in the Hamptons they had spent their first trip in and his ma was over the moon when they told her and Fury six months later that they would become grandparents. Even Fury was smiling.

Despite Bucky's best efforts they did not name their daughter James ("Come on, even that Deadpool actor called his daughter James!"). Nicole Sarah Rogers was born three weeks after Natasha's birthday and the most perfect thing they both had ever seen.

Nikki was just as beautiful as her mother and he knew he would never love anyone as much as he loved his two girls.


	29. Assumptions

_Thanos is defeated and everyone thinks Steve and Natasha are a couple since they spent the last two years in hiding together._

* * *

They won. Steve still couldn't believe it. Together, united as one, they stopped Thanos and his army and saved the entire universe. Vision gave his life and Steve was sure that it would take time for Wanda to move on but they were lucky that no one else besides Vision was lost. Some parts of Wakanda got destroyed but that could be rebuild.

"Hey punk!" Buck walked into the suite T'challa generously let him stay in at the palace and stopped next to him to look out of the window. "This country is truly something, isn't it?"

"Yeah." Wakanda was beautiful. Steve was sure that the damage Thanos bought on Wakanda would be fixed in no time. He turned to look at Bucky who now reminded him so much of the Bucky he knew when he was a little kid from Brooklyn. "I can't tell you how good it is to see you again. To know that you're free."

Bucky gave him a smile. "Yeah. Shuri is really a genius. I can never repay what she and T'challa did for me."

Steve clapped him on the shoulder and they looked out the window in silence. It just felt good to have Bucky by his side again. He missed him so much after just getting him back and then losing him again. But now there was the hope that they could stay together and fight side by side again.

"You're going to that victory party tonight?"

Right, he completely forgot. T'challa invited everyone to celebrate Thanos' defeat and to say goodbye to Peter Quill and his team. Tony would probably be there as well... He had been in Wakanda during the battle but he had a different mission than Steve and didn't fight on the battle field so they hadn't really seen each other. God, that would be one awkward encounter but he also didn't want not to go the party to see everyone again. He knew that Thor was here and he hadn't seen him in years.

"Yeah, I'm going."

"Great. Me too." Bucky looked around the room. "Where's your girl?"

"My what?"

"Your girlfriend?!" Bucky looked him with a duh! look. "Beautiful woman." Bucky held his hand in front of his chest. "About yea height. I think she used to be a redhead. Now blonde."

Was he talking about Natasha? "She's not my girlfriend!"

"Look, I get it if you want to keep it a secret and I won't tell anyone but it's pretty obvious you two are together."

"We're not together."

Did Steve want to be with her? Yes,if he was being honest but they were not together and probably never would be. They had been friends for six years and he had been in love with her for at least four years but shouldn't something happened between them by now? Natasha always stroke him as a woman who would go after what she wanted and she clearly didn't want him. They had spent the last two years with each other, hiding together, fighting together and nothing had happened. They even slept under the sky watching the stars and nothing happened and that had been a very romantic night. Natasha was clearly not interested in him like that. She probably had been waiting for Banner and now that he was back...

"Fine, if you don't wanna tell me, then don't." Bucky sighed. "But I do remember you pulling be to the side before we flew out to the battlefield to make sure to not let Romanoff out of my side."

That was true. He had asked Bucky to do that because Natasha loved to run into danger and he couldn't bear the thought of losing her. It wasn't like he didn't think she could hold her own, oh no she saved his ass more than once but he knew that Natasha didn't value her life a lot and would have sacrificed herself if she thought it was necessary. Thank God it didn't come to a situation like that. He didn't think Bucky would have been able to stop her. There was no force on earth that could stop Natasha Romanoff when she was set on something.

"She's my friend. I didn't want her to get hurt."

"Mhm." Buck didn't sound convinced. "You know what's funny? She actually pulled me to the side too and told me that she would rip my human arm off if I would let anything happen to you. Not that I needed the threat cause I'll always look out for you but I like it when a woman gets protective over her guy. She seems like a swell gal. Bossy and kicks ass, exactly your type." Bucky grinned.

"I'm not her guy! I swear to you there is nothing going on!"

"Maybe, but you didn't deny that she wasn't your type!" Bucky smirked.

Fuck!

* * *

Natasha sat down on the bed Wanda was laying on and starring at the ceiling. "Hey, kid. How are you?"

"I don't know." Wanda looked at her with sad eyes and Natasha's heart broke for her. "I know he didn't die in vain and saved us all but it still hurts so much."

She brushed her fingers through Wanda's long hair hoping it would give her some kind of comfort. She knew how much Vision had meant to Wanda and while they all mourned his death, she knew that it was especially hard for the young woman. "I'm here for you. We are all here for you."

Wanda nodded and closed her eyes. Natasha was aware of the fact that she wasn't really good at comforting people but she would try her best for her friend. Wanda opened her eyes and gave her a small smile. "At least not every couple got separated."

She couldn't quite follow. Who else was an item? Maybe that Quill guy and Gomora and she was pretty sure that Thor was crushing on Valkyrie.

"I'm glad that you and Steve finally found your way to each other!"

WHAT? She and Steve were most definitely not a couple. "Wanda, we're not together!"

Wanda scrunched her nose. "You're not? You're telling me you spent two years on the run and nothing happened between the two of you?"

"Nothing happened." She would be lying if she didn't wish something would have happened and she had been tempted more than once to just grab Steve and kiss him but that would have been wrong. He deserved so much better than her.

"Do you want something to happen?" Wanda asked with a small voice.

Natasha wanted to lie but she just couldn't. It was wrong to lie to someone who just lost someone she loved. "Sometimes, but it does't matter. We're better off as friends."

The young woman sat up and eyed Natasha carefully. "Why? You both obviously want more. Why don't you just give into your feelings?"

"It's complicated. I could never be enough for him."

Wanda reached her hand out to hold her own. "That's not true. You're all he wants and needs."

Was that true? Would she make Steve happy if she told him how she really felt about him? No, she shouldn't. It would be only a matter of time until her past and issues caught up on them and would destroy everything. "It's better this way, believe me."

Wanda shook her head softly but changed the topic to T'challa's victory party and asked what she would wear. Queen Ramonda allowed them to borrow something from her closets since none of them had any clothes remotely appropriate with them and Natasha was really looking forward to see the queen's private collection.

Natasha found a beautiful dark green dress made out of sequins that clung nicely to her body and showed of her cleavage. Queen Ramonda was so kind and gifted it to her. She couldn't even remember the last time she wore such a beautiful gown. The last two years she had only worn ordinary and bland clothes and her catsuit when the situation called for it. And as it turned out the palace truly had everything and red hair dye was delivered to her room. They saved the world, hell they saved the whole fucking universe, the time of hiding was over.

* * *

T'challa gave a beautiful speech and everyone cheered loudly when he was done. They truly won. The universe was safe. Steve still couldn't believe it, there were moments in the last weeks were he was sure that they would lose.

Thor came towards him with a small smile on his face but his eyes were haunted. Vision was not the only one who gave his life, Loki was dead as well. He died to save Thor's life and Thor was sure that Loki was truly dead this time. Steve's heart ached for him, he lost his father, his planet and now his brother.

"Steve!" He shoved a shot glass into his hand. "Have a drink with me! Believe it or not but this Wakandian liquor tastes almost like Asgardian mead!"

"To Loki." Steve surprised himself because he didn't forget that Loki once almost destroyed New York but he was Thor's brother.

Thor raised his glass. "To Loki!"

They watched in silence the party. Bucky was talking to Shuri and Okoye and Tony and Bruce were talking to Parker and Quill and his team. Natasha and Wanda weren't here yet. He wondered if Wanda would even come. Everyone would understand if she wasn't in the mood for a celebration party after losing Vision.

"It's nice." Thor suddenly broke the silence.

"Hm?" He didn't know what Thor meant.

"It's nice that you and Natasha are together now." Thor smiled at him softly. What? "To be honest I never understood that thing between her and Bruce. Don't get me wrong I like Bruce but he's not right for her. I always thought you and her would be perfect together."

 _You spend two years in hiding with a woman and now everyone thinks you're together?_ "We are just friends, Thor."

The Asgardian seemed amused. "Really? So you two haven't been on the run together for the last two years? And didn't I see you stop Thanos with your bare hands when he was about to strike down Natasha?"

He thought no one had seen that. He knew it was suicidal but rather him than her who got killed by Thanos. He was still surprised that he actually managed to hold him off.

"I saw Thanos coming for Natasha, too." Thor explained. "I was on my way to protect her but then you swooped in and I thought I had to save your ass too but you actually stopped him. I had problems to fight him off and I'm stronger than you."

"I guess it was just adrenaline."

"Your friend Wilson had another explanation for that." Thor was grinning and he already knew he wouldn't like Sam's explanation. "He compared it to a mother lifting a car to save her child. Love is quite powerful, my friend."

See, he already knew he wouldn't like Sam's explanation. "It was just the adrenaline."

"Sure." Thor grinned and refilled his glass. "To adrenaline, then."

He really liked Thor better when he was floating around in space. Thor excused himself when he saw Valkyrie walking into the room and made his way over to her. Steve wanted to find Sam to have a word with him about his explanation. How did he even know about that? He saw Sam talking to Bucky and both looked pissed and amused at the same time. God, were they still bickering with each other? Maybe these two were in love and they were just flirting? Maybe Steve should walk over and offer Sam this explanation.

He wanted to walk over to his two friends but then he glanced at the double door and his jaw almost dropped to the floor. Natasha was walking in and looked breathtaking. She was so beautiful in her green dress and her hair was red again. God, he missed her original hair color. She looked good with the blonde but red was just her color. Wanda was by her side and she looked really pretty as well but he had only eyes for Natasha. He thought about going to talk to her but Tony beat him to it and made a beeline straight for Natasha. Wanda saw him and quickly left to join Bucky and Sam. He saw Natasha sigh and then she walked towards Tony.

* * *

Oh great talking to Tony was just what she needed right now. It already took her some time to get Wanda out of her room after she had a set back and was crying for Vision. Natasha held her and let her cry and then she could convince her to go to the party for an hour. The girl needed to see that not everything was lost and that because of Vision all these people and everyone in the universe were now alive because of his sacrifice.

"I see I don't have to call you Blondie anymore."

"Tony." She hoped a waiter with vodka would come her way but it didn't look like it was her lucky day.

"How were the last two years?"

"Not good." Everyone had to hide, they couldn't see the others and she had spent the last two years trying to talk Steve out of his guilt and had to make sure that he wouldn't do something reckless and stupid like trying to take on the UN.

"Yeah about that. I'm sorry." Tony narrowed his eyes. "I didn't see the full picture back then. Didn't realize what damage the Accords could cause."

Okay, she definitely hadn't seen that coming.

"And I shouldn't have been so harsh to you at the hospital." He looked at her. "But tell me the truth. Had you been playing me the whole time? Were you on his side the whole time? Why did neither of you tell me you were a couple? Is that why you let him and Barnes go? Because you didn't want your boyfriend get arrested?"

"Steve's not my boyfriend!"

"You got married?!" Tony looked shocked. "Well, I guess you didn't have much to do in the last 24 months."

For a self-proclaimed genius Tony was sometimes really dumb. "No, Steve and I are not a couple! And we did had a lot to do in the last two years. We traveled around the globe helping people even though the government wanted to lock us up."

"I know." He sighed. "FRIDAY was quite busy with deleting your faces from traffic and security cams."

That was...that was typical Tony. "Thank you."

He waved his hand at her. "Don't sweat it. But why are you two not together? Traveling around the world sounds romantic. And we both know that the Bruce thing was just a distraction. For both of you. He was trying to take his mind of Betty and you... Well, we both know who you were trying to distract yourself from." He pointed his head to the windows and there was Steve standing in a blue tuxedo and trying to stare at them inconspicuously. He was failing at that. God, he looked delicious in that tuxedo and his beard and longer hair. It had been her idea for him to let his hair grow and that had to be the best idea she ever had.

"You're drooling, Romanoff!" Tony chuckled and she glared at him which made him only chuckle more. She must have lost her touch in the last years or after facing a giant purple all powerful alien nothing else seemed scary anymore.

"Have you talked to Steve yet, Tony?"

"No. But I will. I see things clearer now. But not tonight. Tonight we'll celebrate our victory." He smiled at her and then left to talk to Bruce.

God, she had to talk to Bruce at one point, didn't she. The truth was Tony was right. She never cared for Bruce, at least not in the way she pretended to be. She wasn't proud of it and it just proved that she was a bad person. She only used Bruce to distract herself from Steve and her feelings from him. And she let Steve believe that she was still hung up on Bruce so he wouldn't try to make a move on her. Well, she highly doubted that Steve was smooth enough to make a move but she knew that he harbored some kind of romantic feelings for her. She could see it in his eyes, he always wore his heart on his sleeve.

She wanted at least to say hi to Steve and thank him for saving her when Thanos was about to attack her but he was now talking to T'challa. She could wait.

* * *

T'challa told Steve that they would start to rebuild the destroyed parts tomorrow and the damage in New York and Edinburgh was already half gone. In a few weeks nothing would remind the world that it had been very close to its extinction. The Accords were forgotten and they were no longer fugitives. They could go home. God, he didn't even know where that was anymore. Should he go back to the States? Should he be Captain America again? Did he even want that? Bucky already told him that he wanted to stay in Wakanda for some time, he loved the people and the country. Should he stay here as well? And what were Natasha's plans? Would she go back? Was their time together now over? Where was Natasha even? Had she already talked to Bruce? Would they get back together?

"Are you still here, my friend?" T'challa asked amused and stopped his train of thoughts.

"Yes, of course. I'm sorry, Your Majesty."

The king waved him off. "It's fine. Do you already know what you're going to do now? You don't have to hide anymore. The world loves you again."

Maybe he should get a dog. Retire, get a dog and move to Brooklyn. Yeah, that sounded nice. Or maybe he should get a cat. Natasha liked cats, maybe she would come visit him if he got a cat. "I don't know yet."

"I'm sure you and Miss Romanoff have talked about that, haven't you?"

Well, not really. He knew that Natasha was hurt that the Avengers and her home were taking away from her and he kicked himself everyday for being the reason for that. So they never talked about what could happen because he didn't want to give her false hope. "I don't know what she'll do."

"You haven't talked to your girlfriend about your future, Captain Rogers? Aren't you the man with the plan?"

That song would haunt him for eternity, wouldn't it? And why did everyone think Natasha was his girlfriend? "We're not an item."

"You're not? Oh, I assumed... I'm sorry." T'challa looked actually flustered. "Are you sure? I'm positive I heard my sister call you a power couple."

Yeah, they definitely would make one. "No, we're not together."

T'challa smiled. "Well, _now_ you're not. Things can always change. Have a nice evening." With that he left him to talk to other guests. Steve wanted things to change between them but Natasha didn't seem to share the sentiment.

* * *

Natasha spotted Bruce standing alone at a bar table and she decided that she had to talk to him now or she never would. The flight to Wakanda had been more than awkward and she owed him an apology for pushing him off a cliff and turning him into the Hulk for three years.

She walked over to him and he gave her a small smile. "Hey."

"Quite the party, isn't it?"

He looked around. "Yeah. I don't think I'll stay long. It's a bit too much. I don't want the other guy to come out."

"About that-" She began but Bruce stopped her.

"I know what you're going to say and it's okay. The Hulk was needed to stop Ultron and then I ended up helping Thor and his people. It's really okay."

"You really are a great guy."

"Yeah, yeah but not great enough for you."

He really cut right to the chase, didn't he. "Bruce-"

He smiled. "Don't worry. You and I...it would have never worked. We were just fooling ourselves. Betty ended things and you were running away from your feelings. Looks like you still are."

"I'm sorry, Bruce. For everything."

"I know. Me too. And I'm sorry I didn't say it to you back at Barton's farm but you are not a monster, Natasha. You never were. You are a good person and you deserve to be with the man you want. And I think he wants you too judging by the death glare he's giving me right now." Bruce nodded at something behind her and she turned around and saw Steve watching them. He quickly looked away when he realized that he got caught. Cute.

Bruce emptied his drink."I'm going to bed now. It was nice to see and talk to you again." He gave her a warm smile. "Listen to your heart, Natasha. Just this once. You deserve to be happy."

Should she go over to Steve and tell him that he had nothing to worry about? That Bruce was never a threat? That it had always been Steve? Nope, she couldn't do that. She had no problems to piss of Thanos but she couldn't find the guts to tell her best friend that she was in love with him. She helped herself to a vodka bottle and decided to explore the Royal Gardens for a while. She could catch up with the rest of the team later.

* * *

Steve watched Bruce leave the party without Natasha. Did they not get back together? Natasha took a bottle of vodka and left through the doors that led to the Royal Gardens. Was she sad? Should he follow her? He should follow her. Maybe she needed him to comfort her. Did Bruce turn her down? Did he honestly think he would find someone better than Natasha? What an asshole! Natasha was perfect in every single way!

He was about to go after her when Peter Quill blocked his way.

"Captain America!" He clapped his shoulder. "I can't believe you're still alive! I'm such a fan of you! Why did they had to defrost you after I left earth?"

Um, he had no idea how to answer that. It wasn't like he had any saying in when they would find him.

Gamora and Mantis appeared besides Quill. Mantis smiled at him kindly. "Don't talk to him now, Peter. He wants to go after his love."

Right, the woman was an empath. Great, just fucking great. He had to make sure he wasn't around Mantis when Natasha was with him or things would get weird.

Gamora sighed. "Mantis, we talked about this. Don't talk about the feelings of others in public."

"Right. Sorry, Captain." She leaned over and grabbed his collar to whisper in his ear. "She feels the same."

What? She...she did? He wanted to ask her more but Gamora sighed again and then dragged both Quill and Mantis away with an excusing look. Natasha loved him too? Could that be possible? He just had to know. He practically ran out of the ballroom to ensure that no one would try to talk to him and searched the garden for Natasha. She was sitting on a bench, sipping on her bottle and looking up the sky.

He slowed his tempo and walked to her. She didn't turn around but he knew that she knew that it was him. "Hey."

"Hi. Can I sit down?"

He could swear that he heard her sigh. "Of course." She made room for him on the bench.

"Thanks." He sat down and watched her watching the stars. "Nat?"

"Hm?"

"I saw you talking to Bruce."

"Yeah, we had some stuff to talk about." She was still looking at the sky.

"What stuff?"

Natasha chuckled. "Since when are you so nosy?"

 _Since I'm in love with you and wanna know everything about you._ "Just wondering." He shrugged his shoulders.

"We both apologized and agreed that we should be friends, if you must know."

They weren't back together and it looked like they were done for good. Oh, he could hear the angels sing. "Natasha-"

"You look really good in your suit." She was now looking at him. "Did I ever tell you I like your hair like that? And the beard suits you."

He was probably blushing. "Thank you. You look...you look beautiful, Nat. I mean you always do, of course." He stumbled out. God, how did Bucky do it back in the day? "I missed the red."

"Yeah, me too." She smiled and then looked back at the stars.

Bruce and Natasha were done and Mantis told him that Natasha had feelings for him. He had to make sure. He had to know. He took her hand and laced her fingers together when she didn't pull away.

"Steve..." She whispered. "We shouldn't..."

"I'm so fucking tired to do the things I should. I want to live my life the way I want. And I want to be with the woman I love." He heard her gasp. "Nat, I love you for so long now. And I think you love me, too."

Her voice was barely audible. "I do. That's why I can't be with you."

Now that didn't make any sense. "That's bullshit. I know why you think that and let me tell you I don't care about your past. I don't give one single fuck about that. You changed so much and did so many amazing things. I love you for who you are."

"People will judge you."

"I don't care about anyone but you."

"Steve-" He stopped her by pressing his lips against hers. He pulled away after a few seconds thinking she didn't want him to kiss her but then she grabbed his face and slanted her lips over his. He could feel that she poured everything into the kiss. She looped her arms around his neck and landed half in his lap while she explored his mouth with her tongue and sucked on his lips.

She broke the kiss, heavy breathing. "I...I love you." She said it so carefully that he realized she had never said those three words before. She rested her forehead against his. "I've never really dated anyone before."

"Neither have I." He pecked her plump lips. "See, perfect match."

She laughed and kissed him again. "Do you wanna continue this somewhere else?"

He stood up and pulled up her against his chest. "Yes."

* * *

Steve woke up with a naked Natasha on his chest. They didn't go back to the party and went to his room. And then...Natasha made a man out of him. He had been embarrassed that he had no idea what he was doing but Natasha guided him and showed him how to make love to her. The night had been truly perfect and he still couldn't believe that they were finally together. Natasha was finally his and he was hers.

He began to play with Natasha's hair and she pressed a kiss on his chest.

"Morning, beautiful."

She raised her head to look up at him. "Good morning, tiger." She grinned and he was sure that he was blushing. "Don't be embarrassed, Steve. Last night was amazing and I'm already looking to many, many repeats of it."

"Yeah?"

"Yup." She rolled on the mattress and he moved to face her. She smiled at him and gave him a soft kiss. "I'm sorry it took me so long."

He brushed a strain of hair out of her face. "We're together now. That's all that matters." He kissed her and rolled her onto her back. Maybe they could repeat last night now.

"God, Steve! Why did you leave your tuxedo jacket on the floor? Don't you know how expensive these suits are? I thought your mother raised you better than this!" Bucky's voice was suddenly coming from the living room of the suite. He stared at Natasha unsure what to do and she only grinned and hid her face against his chest.

"Are you still sleeping, punk? It's almost ten!" He heard how the door got opened. At least the blankets were covering them. "Get out of bed! We have stuff to do! Why is there a dress on your floor? Wait a minute!" Bucky stopped, he was in the room now. "Did you...OH MY GOD! Why didn't you say something! I don't want to see this! Oh dear God!"

Natasha was now fully laughing and he had to join her. It was kind of hilarious, he had to admit.

"This is not funny, guys! Thank God I walked in now and not later when you two were going at it!" There were steps again. "Use protection, kids!" He yelled and then the door was shut.

"Well, I guess now everyone will know." Natasha was still laughing.

"Are you okay with that?"

She smiled up at him. "Yes, I'm very okay with that."

* * *

 _Bucky always announces himself from now on to make sure that_ _his poor eyes don't have to see_ _Steve and Natasha in a compromising position._

 _I wanted to get this one shot done before Infinity War comes out and crushes my soul._


	30. Cat sitter Steve

**_Natasha's cat in the comics makes another cameo._**

 _Natasha has to leave for a mission and asks Steve to take care of her cat Liho._

* * *

The truth was Steve was head over heels in love with Natasha, he had been for some time now. He had feelings for her ever since they worked together in DC but he never said anything because he didn't want to ruin their friendship in case she didn't feel the same.

But he also had the suspicion that Natasha knew about his feelings because she sometimes used the fact that he couldn't say no to her. Like right now when she asked him sweetly over dumplings in Chinatown if he could look after her cat while she had to do something for Fury and had to leave the country for sometime. And because he loved her and wanted to make her happy he said yes. Even though he hated that cat and he was pretty sure Liho hated him too. That ferocious beast always bit into his ankle when he visited Nat and made sure to sit between him and Natasha during movie nights to make sure he couldn't even try move closer to her. Maybe he was getting crazy but he could swear that Liho was looking at him like she knew that Steve's thoughts about Natasha were sometimes pretty inappropriate.

"Thank you so much again for this, Steve." Natasha lifted Liho up to cuddle her and then sat her gently down on Steve's hardwood floor. "Be nice to Steve, okay?"

Liho meowed and took off to explore his apartment. He hoped the little monster wouldn't destroy his furniture. He walked Natasha to his door and told her to be careful on her mission.

"I will, don't worry." She kissed his cheek and he fought against the urge to grab her and kiss her senseless. "Bye, Steve."

"Bye, Natasha." He watched Natasha disappear behind the elevator doors and closed his apartment door. He turned around and almost shrieked because Liho was sitting behind him and looking up at him like she knew that he wanted to make out with her mom.

So far Liho mostly ignored him and and only paid attention to him when she wanted something (food) from him. The fucking cat actually nodded her head at the feeding dish like she thought he didn't know where to put her food. He did know where to put her food, thank you very much. He really didn't understand why Nat loved that cat so much but he loved Natasha so he had to be nice to Liho.

He tried to get into Liho's good graces by buying her expensive cat food and trying to play with her but she just stared at the toy and then walked away and he swore that she was looking him right in the eyes when she dug her claws into his couch. He clenched his jaw and picked up his phone to call Natasha. He wanted to hear her voice. He decided to facetime her and hoped she had the time to answer.

She picked up after the fourth ring. "Hey!" She smiled brightly and it looked she was in a fancy hotel room. "How's my sweetheart?"

He thought for a hot second that she meant him but Liho's loud meow reminded him that she was talking about the little monster. Liho jumped on his shoulder and Natasha laughed.

"Hey, sweetheart. How are you? Is Steve treating you well?"

Liho looked she was actually listening to Natasha and meowed again. "You should ask if she's treating _me_ well!" He complained and the cat made a tiny growl. Okay, did that little monster actually understand humans?

Natasha's face lit up in amusement. "Is Liho treating you well?"

"No! She hates me!" As on cue the cat bit into his ear and he had to shake her off. "See!"

"I'm sorry!" Nat laughed out. "Liho, don't bite him again! I have to go now, Steve. Sorry. Talk to you soon!" She waved and before he could say anything she ended the call. He hoped that she would be soon done with her mission and would come back to pick up that furry beast.

Liho seemed to remember her mom's words and stopped biting him but she still scratched his couch with her sharp claws. Maybe he should call Nat again but she was on a mission and phone calls could put her in danger. He did send her a pic of a sleeping Liho two days later and he had to admit that a sleeping Liho was kinda cute. Natasha sent him a photo back and he almost dropped his phone when he opened her text. The photo was of Natasha in a bikini and a summer hat. Was that woman planning on torturing him? And what kind of mission needed her to wear a bikini that showed of her perfect body? She sent another text explaining that she was in Cannes going after a drug lord. Not that he would ever admit it and he made sure that Liho was still sleeping but he went to his office and printed the photo out in case he lost it on his phone.

Liho had now completely destroyed his couch and he really wondered why Nat had made him drag the cat tree from her apartment to his for the time the cat was staying here. He never saw her use that tree.

Natasha was gone for three weeks now and he missed her terribly. And Liho seemed to miss her too. The cat was so depressed that she even forgot that she hated him and slept on the end of his bed during the night. It was kind of sad to see the cat like that. Everytime Liho heard something in the hallway she ran to the front door thinking it was Natasha and waited. But it wasn't her and Liho trotted back to the living room and jumped on the bookshelf to look out the window. Was there something he could do for her? He tried to play with her but she was still mostly ignoring him. Except that this night she didn't sleep on the end of his bed but laid down next to him and pressed her back against his arm. Okay, sometimes Liho was cute.

Another week passed and Liho now let him pet her and stopped scratching his couch and used her cat tree. He was making breakfast when someone knocked on the door. Liho ,who had been watching him, peaked her ears up, jumped off the kitchen counter and ran to the front door. She had so much speed that she almost smacked into the door.

Could that be Natasha?

He opened the door and it really was her. She was smiling and had a light tan that made her skin glow. She was leaning forward but Liho jumped up and Natasha barely caught her. "Hi, my little furball!" She kissed the top of her cat's head. Liho was purring and rubbing her head against Natasha's chin. "Oh, I missed you, too!"

She was running her hand through Liho's fur and looked up at Steve. "You grew a beard!"

Yes, he did. Did it have anything to do with the fact that Natasha mentioned a few months ago that she liked men with beards? No, of course not!

"Hi." He was probably grinning like an idot but he was so happy that she was back and he could see with his own eyes that she was unhurt. "Good to have you back."

That earned him a chuckle. "I missed you, too."

He was surprised that his heart didn't jump out of his chest at that. "Yeah?"

She put Liho down and the cat was rubbing her body against her Nat's leg. "Don't act so surprised, Rogers!" She pressed a kiss on his cheek and he hoped she didn't hear him swallow.

"Um, I was just making breakfast. You wanna join me?"

"Oh, yes. I'm starving!"

She followed him into the kitchen and watched him finish the french toasts. "How was the op?"

"Good. Took longer than I thought though." She stole a strawberry from the bowl and grinned when he frowned at her. "Oh, and I met Leonardo DiCaprio at a party in Cannes and he hit on me! Even though I'm not a twenty year old Victoria Secrets model. Was kinda nice for my ego."

He hid his groan. Great, so now movie stars were his competition? It was already annoying enough that pretty much every guy in New York drooled over Nat when they were somewhere. He didn't need that Titanic guy to join that club. "Did you go out with him?"

"He's not my type."

Thank God! "Um, who's your type?"

She smirked and stole another strawberry. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

Yes, he really did. He was hoping that he was her type because she was totally his. They ate breakfast at his kitchen table with Liho sitting on Natasha's lap. She told him more about her mission and that she actually saw Fury in person. He complained that Liho was a little monster and that it took her pretty much the entire time she was at his place to warm up to him which Liho kind of confirmed with a loud meow. Natasha laughed and promised to pay for the damage her cat caused.

"That's not necessary, Natasha."

She licked grease of her lips and he did his best to not stare at them. "Please, Steve."

"It's okay. I don't want your money."

"I could just buy you a new couch and break into your place. Wouldn't be the first time."

"True." He laughed. She had broken in before. "But how do you get the couch to the fourth floor?"

"I hire someone." Her eyes lit up. "I'll just ask Thor!"

Right, he was back on earth and would help her. Thor was still amazed that Natasha had managed to trick his brother and adored her because of it. "Please don't spend so much money on me."

"Fine." She put Liho on the floor who protested loudly. "Stop it, you've been mean to Steve! Let me make you dinner at least, Steve."

"You can cook?"

"Well, I'm no Julia Child but no one died of my cooking. Well, at least no one I didn't want to." She winked and Steve was only half sure that she was joking. He agreed to come to her apartment tomorrow night and Natasha left with Liho after breakfast. Without Liho in his apartment, it was pretty quiet and he actually missed that little monster.

* * *

He had been thinking about getting Natasha flowers but that meant he was assuming something and he wasn't. He couldn't, it wasn't fair to her. She just wanted to do something for him because her cat wrecked havoc on his couch and not because she wanted to have a date with him. So he didn't got her flowers but he took the stuff he got for Liho in the last weeks to give it to her. He didn't need it anymore. He definitely wouldn't get his own cat.

Since it wasn't a date he put on jeans and that shirt Natasha made him buy because it brought out his eyes according to her. He almost put on slacks and a dress shirt but it wouldn't be a date as he constantly reminded himself to not get his hopes. It wasn't the first time they spent the evening together but it was the first time Natasha cooked for him.

He rang her doorbell and a few moments later she opened the door in jeans and a blouse with a floral print. She was smaller than usual and he realized that she was barefoot. Liho came towards him and he expected her to bite into his ankle like she always did but she only rubbed her head against his shin and trotted away. Looked like the last weeks together made the cat hate him less.

"Hey." Natasha flashed him a smile and kissed his cheek. "Come in."

He put the bag with Liho's toys on the dresser in her hallway and Natasha peaked in. "Wow, you really spoiled her."

"Hah! Not really, she mostly ignored me and the toys. I think you'll have more success getting her to play with it."

She smirked over her shoulder and told him to follow her into the kitchen to try her boef stroganoff to see if she had to add more spices. She fed him a spoon and it really tasted amazing. He told her so and she gave him a sweet smile that made his heart flutter.

"Thanks! Table is already set. Sit down, I'll be there shortly." She got two dishes out of her cupboard.

"I can help you."

She shook her head. "Nonsense. You're my guest."

He knew that arguing was pointless and left the kitchen to sit down at her dinning table in her living room. Liho looked at him from the top of her cat tree and then rolled herself into a ball and closed her eyes.

Natasha came in with two steaming plates and placed one in front of him. "I brought this wine from Nizza." She explained when she poured it into his wine glass. "I got a whole box. Try it."

He took a sip and it was amazing. He didn't want to know what Natasha had paid for it. She poured herself a glass, sat down and they ate. They talked about his search for Bucky, Fury and his attempts to find HYDRA cells in Europe, and Sam's plan to move to New York.

"So you and Sam..." Natasha grinned over the rim of her wine glass. "You two are pretty close..."

He rolled his eyes. "We're not a couple."

"Would be okay if you were."

"I know but I'm not gay."

She dipped a piece of bread into the sauce. "Can I ask you something? Why did you never go out with one of the girls from SHIELD? You would have liked them, I picked them out very carefully."

He had hoped she would never ask him that. _They weren't you._ He couldn't tell her the truth. "I don't know. Guess I wasn't ready. And it didn't help that women most see Captain America when they look at me and not Steve Rogers."

She had a look on her face he couldn't read but it left her face quickly and she poured them another round of wine. She also made mousse au chocolat and they ate it on her couch watching TV. Liho joined them and laid down on Natasha's lap.

"She's not that bad." He admitted when Liho let him stroke her back.

Natasha laughed softly. "I knew she would warm her way into your cold heart!"

"Hey, I do not have a cold heart. She's just a little monster."

"I know. You have a kind heart, Steve. I've always known." She looked sad and he wanted to ask her why but Liho suddenly jumped up and patted to the kitchen. "I guess someone is hungry." Natasha got up and followed her cat to feed her.

Not wanting to sit alone on her couch he walked into the kitchen as well. Natasha was currently trying to get something from the top of her shelf and he had to smile at the sight. She was about to climb on the kitchen counter when he walked up behind her and grabbed the canister for her.

"Oh, thanks." She turned around and he now noticed that he was in her personal space. Their chests almost touched. Natasha wasn't looking into his eyes but staring at his lips. He leaned down and she closed her eyes and he could already feel her breath on his face-

"Meow!" Liho screamed and the moment was ruined. That cat still hated him!

Natasha looked almost flustered, grabbed the canister from his hand and turned to Liho. "Right, you want your treat, don't you?" She gave Liho two treats and left the canister on the kitchen counter. She turned around to him. "It's late. You should probably go and get your sleep. You're pushing one hundred."

"Natasha-"

"You should go."

"Do you really want me to?"

"I...you should go before we do something that you...that we regret."

Why would he ever regret anything when it came to her. "What do you think will happen if I don't leave?"

She smiled but it didn't reach her eyes. "We're gonna have sex. We've been dancing around it for ages."

That was the first time she admitted that there was something between them. "And you don't want to sleep with me?"

"Oh, believe me I do. I really want to. But you can't have sex with me. You'll regret it."

"I won't." He stepped closer to her and her back hit the edge of the kitchen counter when she tried to pull away. He stopped immediately. "Don't you know how much you mean to me? That you're always on my mind? I just don't want to sleep with you. I want to be with you."

"Steve-"

"Is there any chance you want the same?"

She bit her lip. "I can't stop thinking about you."

This had to be the greatest thing he had ever heard. "Yeah?"

"Yes, but it's bad. I shouldn't feel about you in that way. It's wrong."

He felt bold and cupped her cheek with his hand. "No, it's not. You have no idea how happy you just made me!"

"I make you happy?" She asked with a small voice.

He brushed his thumb over her cheek. "Yes, so fucking much."

She chuckled at him cursing and then she leaned up and kissed him. "All I want for you is to be happy, Steve."

His mind was still blank from the fact that she just kissed him. She pressed her lips to the corner of his mouth. "Steve?"

"Sorry, I just blacked out. Can you kiss me again?"

She threw her arms around his neck and he lifted her onto the kitchen counter. She sucked his lower lip into her mouth and wrapped her legs around his waist to press him closer to her. He was pretty sure he went to heaven. They kept kissing and her hands moved to the buttons of his shirt. He pulled away.

"Too fast?" Natasha asked him with her hands on his first button.

He cupped her wrists with his hands. "Is this...do you just want sex from me?"

She looked at their hands and then at him. He'd never seen her eyes look so soft and open. "No. I want...Ugh, I'm not good at this. I want you to love me. I know it's self-"

"Hey." He moved his hands to her face. "I love you."

She smiled. "You love me?"

"Yeah." He kissed her forehead and he heard her sigh. Had anyone ever kissed her forehead before? "So is there any chance you love me back? Or am I making a fool out of myself right now?"

Her smile grew wider. "No, you're not. I love you." She kissed him softly. "I love you."

He was grinning so much that his cheeks started to hurt but he didn't care. He had finally what he always wanted. He kissed her deeply and her hands unbuttoned his shirt. He eventually carried her to her bedroom because there was no way he would make love to her for the first time in her kitchen with Liho watching. He had the feeling that the cat would bite him in his naked ass if she saw what he would do to her mom.

That night he slept better than he had in years with Natasha's soft skin pressed against his and her arms and legs wrapped around his body. It didn't even bother him that Natasha drooled on his chest during the night but did bother him that Liho somehow broke into the bedroom and thought his face was the right sleeping place for her.

* * *

"Do you think they'll like each other?" He asked Natasha while he followed her up the stairs to their house in Brooklyn.

She looked over her shoulder while unlocking the door. "They have to. We just have to get them used to each other. Don't worry, honey. I'm sure it will go well."

He tightened his hold on Dodger to make sure he wouldn't drop him. It took him weeks but he finally convinced Natasha to adopt a dog. He was just worried that Liho would make Dodger's life a living hell. He didn't want to get into a fight with his wife about their pets.

Liho greeted them at the door and stared at the dog in his arms. He carefully put Dodger down and Liho just kept staring and then turned around and walked away.

"See?" Natasha kneeled down to pet their dog. "They will get along. We just have to have patience."

He pulled Natasha up and kissed her. "You're the boss, Nat."

She grinned. "And don't you forget."

He rolled his eyes. "I know. Happy wife, happy life."

Her grin got wider and he decided to kiss it off her face. He was tempted to continue this in the bedroom but Dodger jumped up their legs and Natasha picked him up and walked through the house to show him everything. He followed them but neither Natasha or Dodger were paying attention to him. He probably had to get used to the fact that he was now the number three in his wife's life after Liho and Dodger. The dog licked her face and she laughed so beautifully that he couldn't see a problem with that.


	31. Summer nights

_Clint invites the Avengers to his farm and Steve sees Natasha in a way he's never seen her before. And Sam helps him to realize something._

* * *

Steve watched Natasha roll her eyes at Sam who carried three duffel bags to the quinjet. They were going to Clint's for the weekend and he also didn't understand why Sam thought he needed so much stuff. They would only spend two nights there. Wanda and Rhodey followed Sam; Wanda wore a backpack while Rhodey had only one duffel bag.

"Are you planning on moving in?" Natasha teased Sam when they were all on board.

"You gotta be prepared for everything, Romanoff."

She shook her head lightly and walked to the cockpit. He sat down in the co-pilot's seat and used the quiet to read the book he's been wanting to start for weeks now. He could hear Wanda, Sam and Rhodey laughing in the background but he enjoyed the comfortable silence here with Natasha. She was humming a song he didn't recognize and he listened to her voice and kept reading his book. He was halfway through when they landed in Rhode Island where Clint's farm and family were hidden.

The whole Barton clan was waiting for them with waving hands and smiles on their faces. The greeting was warm and Laura immediately pushed Nate into Wanda's arms and the girl had little smile on her face while carrying around the child that was named after her brother. Lila grabbed Natasha's hand and dragged her to the stables to show her the pony Clint got for the kids.

Steve, Sam and Rhodey followed the rest of the Bartons inside where they were shown to their rooms (he had to share one with Sam and Nat one with Wanda while Rhodes got one for himself) and drank iced in the kitchen. Clint tried to convince them to help him remodel the veranda but Rhodey was the only one who genuinely wanted to help. Steve never had a knack for anything crafts related besides drawing. They would have a barbecue later in the evening and he was already looking forward to it. He couldn't remember the last time he had good spareribs.

Natasha and Lila came back and Natasha went upstairs with her to change. He almost choked on his iced tea when they came back. Natasha looked so different. Still incredibly beautiful but different. She looked soft. Her hair was in braids around her head and she wore a summer dress with floral print and brown summer boots. He'd never seen her in such a look before. Hell, he'd never seen her in a dress before that wasn't a gown. She looked good like this, she looked cute.

He wondered briefly if Natasha could read his thoughts because she smirked at him and then poured herself and Lila glasses of iced tea. Lila asked Wanda if she could braid her hair as well and both girls left to get to Lila's room.

Natasha leaned against the kitchen counter and talked to Laura in low whispers he even couldn't understand with his enhanced hearing.

"So when do we get to drive the tractor?" Sam asked Clint with a grin on his face.

Clint laughed and told Sam and Rhodey to follow him. Laura excused herself to put Nate down and he was alone with Natasha.

She joined him at the kitchen table and crossed her arms under her chest which pushed her breasts up. When did he start to notice these things?

"Your hair looks nice like that."

"Yeah, maybe Lila will be a hair stylist one day."

"Maybe." They smiled at each other and again he enjoyed the silence between them. Just being in her presence made him content and he felt at peace. He couldn't imagine leading the team with anyone else. She was his right hand, his second in command, his best friend. Natasha reached into the fruit bowl on the table and plopped a grape into her mouth. He really liked to know how those plump lips would feel against his skin. Woah! Where did that come from?

Cooper asked them to play soccer and that's how the whole gang ended up on the field in front of the house running after a ball. Cooper chose his aunt, dad and Sam to join his team and Steve, Rhodey, Wanda and Lila tried to beat them but the four of them were really good and Natasha turned out to be an excellent player. Not that he was surprised, Natasha was good at everything. She was blocking him so he wouldn't get to the ball but somehow their legs entangled and they fell to the ground. She landed half on top of him and was laughing with strains of hair falling into her face. She looked like an angel and he was itching to bring the sight on top of him on paper. He didn't even realize he had his hands on her lower back and was staring into her eyes until someone whistled and Natasha tried to get up but his hands stopped her from it.

"Steve?"

"Um, right. Sorry." He let go and she stood up. He immediately missed the warmth and the feeling of her body. Okay, what was going on with him? Did Laura put something into the iced tea?

Sam grinned at him before he offered him a hand to help him up. They continued the match but Steve's team had no chance to catch up and Cooper's team won. The losers had to make the barbecue while the others watched them. And Clint didn't hold back with his commentary on how to rightfully grill and Wanda used her powers to hit him with a corn. The barbecue was delicious and Steve was happy to eat surrounded by friends and enjoyed the warm summer night.

They sat around a fire and ate stick bread and after the kids went to bed Clint brought out the moonshine ( Steve pretended not to notice how Natasha let Wanda sip from her glass from time to time) and Rhodey and Sam told horror stories from their boy scouts time. He couldn't stop looking at Natasha. The fire gave her skin a warm glow and she was smiling the whole time and laughed a few times at Sam and Rhodey's stories. Had she always been this beautiful? He knew that she was beautiful, he wasn't blind but he was starting to think that she had to be the most beautiful woman on earth. Really, how could anyone compete with that angelic face?

Sam suggested to play Never Have I Ever and Steve was more than relieved that the others turned it down with loud groans. He knew that this game was mostly about sex questions and he had no intention to let the others know about his lack of experience. Stark's jokes were already bad enough, he didn't need to confirm that he really was a virgin.

Clint told them how he met his wife with Laura correcting him a few times when he tried to appear smoother than he really had been. He kept glancing at Natasha and she caught him and hold eye contact until Wanda whispered something into her ear and it almost looked like Natasha was slightly blushing. He didn't even know she was capable of that.

They called it a night an hour later and all went to their rooms. Sam was already in his bed when Steve came back from his shower.

"Did Nat seem different to you?" He asked him when he slid under the blankets.

"No. Why?"

"I don't know." He really didn't. He had no idea what was going on with him. "She looks different today. Really pretty."

"When's Natasha not pretty?"

True. "Yeah. I guess I just saw her differently today."

Sam flipped the lamp on the nightstand on. "Today?"

"Um, yeah?"

Sam's eyes widened. "Oh my God. You really didn't know, did you? I always thought you never wanted to talk about it but you didn't realize it. Wow!"

"Huh?" What was Sam talking about?

"Steve, don't tell me you're now only realizing you're in love with Natasha."

Sorry, he was supposed to be what with Natasha? That was completely ridiculous! Natasha was his friend! She was his friend, his right hand, the person he trusted most in the world, the person he would do anything for if she asked him to. The person who's laughter was his favorite sound in the world. Oh God!

"I'm in love with Natasha?"

Sam chuckled and sat up on his bed. "Took you only two years to realize that. I actually thought you two were already together when the whole SHIELD/HYDRA debacle went down."

So he was in love with Natasha? When did he fall in love with her? Was that something people knew? "How come you knew this and I didn't?"

"Well, to be fair I always assumed you didn't want to talk about it. To me it was pretty obvious. I mean you should have seen your face every time Nat called you during our search for Bucky. And the way you talk about her, like she hung the moon or something. And you talk about her a lot! And I see the way you look at her." He laughed a little. "And I certainly see the way you look when a guy hits on her."

Wow, who would have thought the trip to Clint's farm would be such an epiphany for him. Now that he was thinking about, he couldn't believe he didn't realize sooner that he loved Natasha. But it didn't really matter because he was sure that she didn't feel the same. She was still trying to set him up with women who worked at the Avengers facility. He had almost dropped his cup of coffee when she had suggested that he should ask out Hill. That would have been unprofessional. And weird. So fucking weird.

"Please don't tell anyone about this, Sam."

"I won't. Don't worry. But maybe you should tell Natasha." He gave him an encouraging smile.

He shook his head. "No! She doesn't feel the same."

Sam scoffed. "I beg to differ. I might can't read her as well as you but that woman called you the time when we were away. And not even to talk about Barnes or missions or anything. I heard you two talk about anything and everything. And have you ever noticed that all the girls she suggests for you are not really the right fit for you?"

He had actually a point there. She chose great women but there was always something that was a deal breaker for him. Did she do that on purpose? "What am I supposed to do?"

Sam shrugged his shoulders and turned the light off. "Don't know. But you have to make the first move. I don't think she'll ever tell you the truth about her feelings for you on her own."

Great, he was terrible when it came to those things!

* * *

The girls drove into town the next day and Clint and Rhodey managed to talk him, Cooper and Sam into helping them with the veranda. Together they renewed the floor and and set up a porch swing. They were admiring their work when the girls came back from their trip.

"Are you gonna call him, Auntie Nat?" He heard Lila asked and his ears perked up. _Call who?_

"I don't know, kiddo."

"But he was so handsome. And he has a dog!"

Natasha laughed. "We'll see."

Clint greeted his wife with a kiss. "How was the shopping trip?"

"Good. Lila, Wanda and I found some clothes and Natasha found a guy. Well, he found her."

He clenched his jaw and saw out of the corner of his eye that Sam was giving him an amused look. _Not helping, Sam!_

"He just gave me his number." Natasha shrugged and handed Lila a shopping bag out of the trunk.

"I didn't know you were looking for someone." Rhodey said. "I have a friend who you might like."

"I'm not looking for anything." Natasha clarified and he was relieved. "He just talked to me and asked me to call him. Which I won't do. I don't even live in Rhodes Island."

No, but _he_ lived down the hall so that was a point for him, right?

Steve chopped more wood so the Bartons had enough for the winter and he watched Natasha running around with Lila and Cooper. She looked so carefree and happy. He really had to insist that she would take a few days off on the regular to visit her family.

They had another barbecue in the evening and this time he and Rhodey gave Clint unasked commentary on how to probably grill. Clint stuck his tongue out which made Lila giggle. This evening was as great as the last one and they laughed and bonded. The Bartons were really great and he was happy for Clint that he had his family.

Everyone wanted to go to bed but Natasha decided to stay outside to watch the stars. Sam nodded into Nat's direction and Wanda's smile on her face told him that Sam was not the only who had known about his love for Natasha.

"You mind some company?" He asked and put a blanket on Nat's bare legs.

"No, no. Sit down."

They watched the stars for some time and listened to the crickets. "Nat, can I ask you something?"

"Technically you already did. But sure, shoot."

"Why are still trying to set me up?"

She was still looking at the sky. "Because you deserve to have someone in your life. A good and kind woman by your side."

Didn't she realize he already had that? With her? "Then why are all the women not the right match?"

"Shouldn't I ask you that?" She snorted. "You always find a flaw."

"I don't want you to look for a date for me anymore."

She turned to look at him with surprise in her eyes. "Okay. You found someone?"

"Actually yes, I have."

Something flickered in her eyes but it was gone as soon as he spotted it. Was is jealousy? "And who? If you don't mind me asking."

He was wondering if he should tell her the truth when he saw a shooting star and got an idea. "Look!" He pointed at the sky. "Make a wish! You made one?"

"Um, sure." Natasha looked confused.

"You wanna know what I wished for?"

Natasha raised an eyebrow. "I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to tell."

"Well, I kinda have to so it comes true."

"Okay?"

He really hoped he was being romantic and not creepy. "My wish is that you'll go on a date with me."

Natasha blinked a few times at him. "What?"

Well, at least she didn't start laughing. "I really want to go out with you. It took me some time but I finally realized that I already have the right partner by my side. You."

She was still staring at him. "Steve, you don't actually mean that. You should ask out Maria. Or Wanda."

"No! I only want to take you on a date."

"I...I should go to bed." She stood up but her legs got caught in her blanket and she lost her balance and ended up in his lap. Their faces were so close that he felt her breath on his skin. Her hands wandered to his shoulders. "Where would you take me?"

He felt hope stirring in his heart. "We could go to the ballet. We can do whatever you want."

She smiled a little. "The ballet sounds great. I haven't been there in ages." She looked into his eyes. "Is that really what you want?"

"Yes." He assured her. He had never been more sure of anything before. "Do you want that too?"

"Yes." She whispered. And then she kissed him. And for the first time in a very long time he was truly happy.

* * *

 _Thank you for your reviews, faves and follows! They mean a lot!_

 ** _Remember not to spoil Infinity War! #thanosdemandsyoursilence_**


	32. Stupid game!

_**For LoneWolfOneill. I don't think this is what you had in mind but I hope you'll like it anyway.**_

 _Steve and Natasha are getting closer and she doesn't realize how close until they play a game on Ellen to raise money._

* * *

Natasha slipped out of her high heels and turned the lights on in her apartment in Tony's tower. She had a wonderful evening but her feet hurt and she wanted to take a hot bath to ease the ache in her feet. She didn't come very far because Clint was sitting on her couch and whistling at her when she walked into the room.

"Woah, Tasha! Looking good! Where were you all dressed up like that?"

She looked down at the black ball gown she was wearing. "At the theater. The Bolshoi is in town."

"You went alone?"

"No." She unzipped her dress and let it fall to the floor. The dress was uncomfortable and it wasn't like Clint hadn't seen her in her underwear before during one of their missions.

His eyes were on her face. "Hot date?"

"Ha!" That was actually funny considering who went with her. "No. Steve came with me."

"What?! You both dressed up and went to see a ballet?"

She hung her dress over her arm planning to put in back in her closet. "So?"

"How's that not a date?"

"Because it was just two friends going out, nothing more."

"Aha."

Clint didn't sound convinced but she didn't care. Her bath tub was calling her.

* * *

Steve patiently waited for Sam to finish his final round of their morning run in Central Park. He already finished his 5k like twenty minutes ago but who was counting.

"One day I'm gonna be faster than you!" Sam yelled when he reached the bench Steve was sitting on.

"Something tells me that's never gonna happen." He grinned at his friend and crossed his arms behind his head. It was really nice not to be the slowest anymore. Before the serum a 5k run would have probably killed him.

"I don't know why I ever thought Captain America was a nice dude."

He only laughed at Sam.

"You wanna go with me and my cousin to a Knicks game? Stark lets us use his box."

That sounded like fun. He hadn't actually been to a basketball game before. "When's the game?"

"Tomorrow night."

"Oh, sorry. I already got plans."

"With whom?" Sam actually sounded surprised that he had already plans. Should he be offended?!

"With Nat. We're going to a concert here in the park."

" _Oh,_ I see how it is. I didn't know you were dating. Why didn't you tell me that before?"

"What?" Since when did going to a concert together was dating? "We're not dating, Sam."

"Fine, don't tell me." Sam got up. "Race you back to the tower?"

"Sure, eat my dust." He ran off and heard Sam cursing behind him. He still didn't get why he thought that he and Natasha were dating. They just did things together as friends. He went to the movies last Monday with Sam. Had that been a date as well? No.

* * *

Pepper was walking into the common kitchen when Steve had lunch with Natasha, Tony and Clint. She was wearing one of her business suits and Steve was surprised that she was here at this time of the day. She was usually at her office and wouldn't show up until dinner.

"Just the people I was looking for." She smiled and sat down next to Tony who gave her a quick kiss.

"What are you doing here, Peps?" Tony asked. "Not that I'm happy that you're here and not at your desk."

"Remember that we were thinking about doing charity? Being more public so people would trust you guys more after Ultron?" Tony looked at his burrito but Pepper kept talking. "So I just got off the phone with Ellen."

"No!" Natasha said immediately and Steve was confused. Who was Ellen? "No, I'm not going on her show!"

He couldn't follow. "Who's Ellen? What show?"

"Ellen DeGeneres. One of the most popular people in the world. She has her own talk show with high ratings and millions of views on YouTube. Going on her show will get you lots of good PR, Natasha!" Pepper said with a stern voice to Nat who rolled her eyes.

"Nothing is stopping you from going. I'm sure the people will love to see Captain America and Iron Man play some stupid games and talk about stuff. I'm not going."

"Hey, I'm also here." Clint threw into the round.

"I thought you retired?" Natasha shot back with a smirk. "And you can't go, you have a family to protect."

Clint sighed in defeat. "You guys better get me some Ellen underwear!"

What? They were supposed to bring him Ellen's underwear? He must have looked confused because Pepper explained that the woman had a fashion line.

"Natasha, you have to go! You're the only woman on the team and representation matters!" Pepper told her with a smile.

"Are you forgetting Wanda?"

"She's not ready and you know it."

Pepper was right, Wanda was in therapy to move on from her brother's death and to heal from HYDRA. They couldn't drag her on national television. He looked over to Natasha who was gnawing on her lower lip.

She clenched her jaw. "Fine, I'll do that stupid show but I'm gonna complain the whole time."

Pepper clapped her hands. "Excellent! I don't even have to ask you, Tony. You love to see your face on TV."

"You know me so well, darling!"

"Steve?" Pepper gave him a small smile. "Are you in?"

He hated being in the spotlight. He had felt like a circus clown when he had to do the USO tour. "It's for charity?"

"Yes." Pepper nodded. "The money goes to the children's hospitals in New York and Los Angels."

He couldn't really say no now, could he? "Okay, I'll do it."

Pepper looked happy and stood up. "It's gonna be great, I know it. The show will be taped next Monday. I let the staff in Malibu know that we're coming."

They agreed to spend the weekend at Tony's mansion before they would do the show on Monday. He really hoped he wouldn't embarrass himself. He went after lunch to his floor and watched some clips from the Ellen Show on YouTube. He hoped he wouldn't have to take off his shirt.

* * *

Natasha enjoyed the ocean view from Tony's mansion in Malibu and the drinks but she was so not looking forward to appear on a fucking talk show. Those were for celebrities and internet sensations and not for assassins. She would really stand out compared to Tony and Steve. One was a billionaire and the other America's golden boy. And she was a former Russian spy. It should have really been Sam or Rhodey in her place but Pepper thought it would be better if the original Avengers would appear on Ellen. Clint couldn't go because he had to protect his secret family, Bruce was MIA and Thor was somewhere in space looking for Infinity Stones which only left her. Fucking fantastic! At least Pepper promised her to go with her to Beverly Hills to do some shopping with Tony's credit card.

Happy drove them Monday morning to the studio where the show was recorded and Natasha could see how nervous Steve was. He was playing with his water bottle and tapping his foot. Tony on the other hand looked pleased that he would be the star of the whole thing even though Natasha suspected that Steve's flustered self would steal many hearts today. She was not nervous or pleased, just annoyed and hoped that it would be over soon.

Ellen introduced herself and she was a really kind woman so Natasha promised herself to pull herself together for the show. It was only twenty minutes and then their segment would be over. Tony would play some 5 seconds game with her and then she and Steve would join them and talk a bit and then play a game to find out who knew who the best. She would probably lose that game because she only collected data that was helpful for their missions and not what Tony's favorite ice cream flavor was. Who cared? They had JARVIS for these kinds of things.

Tony was already onstage and she and Steve were waiting for their cue. She could practically feel how nervous Steve was.

"Hey, don't worry. The audience is gonna love you."

He gave her a forced smile. "Okay."

"It's already over in fifteen minutes and you're helping kids that way."

He nodded. "I know. I just...I just don't like the attention. I never wanted this to be part of being Captain America."

She squeezed his arm. "I know. Take a deep breath and just consider this as a mission."

The producer gave them the sign that they had to walk in and the audience was screaming so loud she feared her eardrums would burst. She wasn't an idiot, she knew the people were screaming because of Steve and not her. She smiled and slipped into her Natalie Rushman persona to charm the people. Natasha Romanoff wouldn't be able to do that. Natalie was here to sell the Avengers.

They joined Tony on a white couch and talked with Ellen about life at the Avengers Tower and how they all got along with each other. They shared some anecdotes about Thor exploring "Midgardian" habits and how he once almost burned down the common kitchen with his pop tarts. Ellen wanted to know if she and Steve were currently seeing someone and when they both said no, Ellen jokingly said that they should date each other. She thanked Thor that Clint wasn't here because he would have had a field day with this after claiming she and Steve were going on dates.

"So I wanna play a game with y'all to get to know our heroes a little bit better." She handed them three tablets. "I'll ask you a few questions and you use that to write down the answers,okay?."

She and Steve nodded while Tony already announced that he would win that game. She personally suspected that Steve would win since he genuinely wanted to know things about the others. He was the kinda guy who knew your favorite brand of tea and always had some at his floor. He probably didn't even do it on purpose, it was just something Steve did.

"Okay, first question. What college did Tony graduate from?"

She actually knew the answer to that question and so did Steve.

"When was Steve born?"

Another one she knew. She sometimes wondered if they mainly picked Steve for Project Rebirth because of his birthday. Captain America being born on the fourth of the July? They had probably been clapping each other on the shoulder for picking him.

"What's Natasha's favorite color?"

Tony guessed black which was wrong. Steve guessed cornflower blue which was correct.

Both she and Steve got the next question about Tony wrong. How was she supposed to know that he had a flamingo as a kid?!

"What's Steve's favorite dessert?"

Tony flipped his tablet. "Gotta be apple pie, right Cap? Don't disappoint America!"

"No, it's not."

It was tiramisu and she guessed right. Of course she did, they had made it together a few times and then shared over movies. Clint would probably think again that it had been dates.

Tony couldn't answer any of the questions about her or Steve but they both answered each one correctly. Was she getting sloppy? Had she let her guard down so much that Steve noticed these things about her? He knew her favorite color, book, movie, drink (it was not martini like Tony guessed but gin tonic), show and favorite city. She never told him these things directly, he must have figured them out on his own. He was more observant that she had been giving him credit for.

"So it's a tie between Captain America and Black Widow." Ellen announced. "Sorry Iron Man. but you're out." Tony pouted but he seemed amused that she and Steve knew so much about each other. "You two really know each other. I mean it's your business but you guys should totally be together." Ellen joked and the audience was practically hollering. Steve blushed and Natasha did her best no to go ballistic. Pepper would probably be mad if she killed Ellen DeGeneres. She was almost as beloved as Steve by the American people so she would probably lose her American citizenship if she killed America's sweetheart. She forced a smile and tried not to immediately bolt when Ellen said goodbye to them. She and Steve were both carrying the Ellen merchandise they won and she couldn't wait to throw into the trash. But she probably shouldn't do it here. That would be rude. At least Pepper and Ellen's producers thought that the appearance would get a lot of donations for the children's hospitals.

"I'm never doing that again." She hissed to Pepper on their way to the car. She hated the whole fucking segment. She didn't want people to know what her favorite book was but now they would. Only Clint had known it and apparently Steve and soon Ellen's viewer.

Pepper just smiled at her sweetly and linked her arm with Tony. "This will shine a really good light on the Avengers. It makes you more human and people will love that you know so much about each other. They will realize that you are really friends and in this together." She said when they were in the car.

"I thought it would be worse." Steve sighed. "I'm just glad I didn't make a fool out of myself."

"We totally have to make an Avengers Instagram account and let you pose in that Ellen underwear, Steve." Tony said with a smirk on his face. "We're gonna break the internet with that!"

She didn't have to look at Steve to know that he was blushing. "No, no social media, Tony. We can't be too accessible for the public." Steve decided and he was right. They weren't celebrities, they had to run high risked ops.

"So where do you wanna start our shopping trip?" Pepper asked without looking up from her phone. "I was thinking Louboutin? I need new shoes."

She was in no mood for a shopping tour. "Actually, I have to go back to New York." She lied and didn't know why. "Happy, can you drop me off at the airport?"

Pepper looked a bit disappointed but nodded. "Okay. Another time then. Should we all leave? This way you don't have to take a regular flight."

Tony reminded her that they had a business dinner tonight. Steve offered to come with her but she declined and Happy drove her to the airport after he dropped the others off at some fancy restaurant. She had luck and got a ticket for the next flight to New York. She still didn't know why she was practically fleeing. She boarded the plane and six hours later she was back in New York. She didn't want to go to the Tower and took a cab to her safe house in Brooklyn. She hadn't checked her phone yet and when she did she saw that Laura had texted her.

 _Just saw you guys on Ellen! Is there something you wanna tell me about you and Captain America?_

She ignored the text and took a hot shower. Since she hadn't been at her place in Brooklyn in ages she had no food here and had to order something to eat. She picked her phone up to place an order when she saw that Clint sent her a text.

 _For not dating Steve, he sure knows a lot about you._

She ignored him and ordered Chinese. She sat down in front of her TV and was briefly considering to watch the Ellen Show but decided against it and watched some Netflix while eating her spring rolls. Her phone lit up with a text from Steve.

 _Hope you had a safe flight back home. I know you hated the show but you did really good. So many little girls will look up to you because they finally have a female superhero! I know I look up to you, Nat. Good night and see you soon._

Wow, why did he have to be so sweet? She wanted to ignore his text as well but she couldn't. She sent him a brief thank you and went to bed.

* * *

JARVIS found a trace on Barnes and Steve left right after LA to go after him. Natasha was relieved that she wouldn't have to see him for some days. She still didn't like it that he seemed to know so much about her. It made her feel exposed. She felt vulnerable with him seeing through her. Her walls were her only protection and Steve somehow was tearing them down.

She helped Murdock and his new super friends with something in Hell's Kitchen and when she returned to the Tower one week later Steve was already back. Without Barnes. She personally wasn't a fan of him (he was the only one who managed to ever shoot her and then he did it twice) but he was Steve's friend and she wanted him to have Barnes back in his life.

She took a tub of Ben and Jerry's out of the freezer and made her way to Steve's floor. JARVIS let her in and she found Steve sitting at his desk looking over files. Probably about Barnes.

"You wanna share this with me?" She held the ice cream up.

Steve smiled and stood up from his desk. "I'd love to."

She got two spoons from his kitchen and they sat down on his couch. "You already heard that we collected five million dollars with our appearance on Ellen?" He asked her. "They can do lot for the kids with that money."

That was true and she wasn't so angry anymore about the whole thing. But she meant what she said, she would never do it again. "That's great."

"Why were you so upset after the show? I know you made that up. Having to go back to New York."

She stopped herself from widening her eyes. How on earth had he seen through her lie? "Hm? I don't know what you mean."

He laughed and dug the spoon into the tub. "Sure, you do. We both know that you were upset and wanted to leave LA as quickly as possible. I just don't get why you got so upset. You were awesome on that show. Hey, you won the game!"

"So did you." She said bitterly.

Steve furrowed his eyebrows. "And that bothers you? That you weren't the only winner?"

So he didn't know everything about her. That was good but she was also disappointed that he realize what she meant. "No. Just forget it."

"No, you were clearly upset and I wanna know why. You're my friend."

Lying even more to Captain America was probably treason and she didn't want to go back to Russia. "I didn't realize you knew so many things about me."

Steve's face fell and she felt like someone punched her in the gut. "And that bothers you?"

"Well, yeah. I don't like being this exposed to someone. I'm very careful with what I let people know about me and I didn't even notice that you knew all that stuff. You probably know even more than that about me."

"Oh, I didn't know." His cheeks turned pink. "I love to learn new things about you. I wanna know everything about you."

Another reason why they were so different. Steve wanted to know everything about her because he cared and she wanted to know things about others to use it later against them if she had to. How did they ever end up becoming friends?

"Natasha?"

Oh God, she was still staring at him. How embarrassing! "Yeah?"

"I hope you know that I'll never use anything I learn about you against you."

He knew her so well! "I know, Steve."

"Natasha?"

"Yeah?"

"I've been thinking...about what Ellen said and some things Sam said to me recently. We've been doing a lot of stuff that could count as dates..." He rubbed the back of his neck. "Do you want to go on an actual date with me?"

 _No._ "Yes." Wait, what?! What just happened? Why did she say yes? What was wrong with her? She didn't want to go on a date with Steve! _You know that's not true._ A voice whispered in her head. Steve's whole face lit up and she couldn't take her yes back. She just couldn't.

"Really?" He was excited. "Wow, that's great. What do you wanna do? There is this rooftop restaurant looking over Central Park. It looks really...romantic."

He really had thought about this, hadn't he? And she now realized that she had been freaking out about Steve knowing so much about her because it meant that they were getting closer. "Okay. Yes, that sounds lovely. You wanna go there tonight?"

"Yes!I pick you up at seven."

He did and even got her flowers. The restaurant and the food were amazing and they ate ice cream on their way through Central Park back to the Tower. Steve walked her to her door and she gave him a short kiss as a thank you for the great date.

Two years later Ellen DeGeneres sent them personalized bathrobes and an endless supply of Ellen underwear for their wedding. Steve did not pose for Instagram but he did pose for his wife in their honeymoon suite.


	33. I can't remember to forget you

_**For nocapla5.**_

 _Steve and Natasha spend a night together and he thinks they're finally getting together but Natasha ignores him from that moment on and he doesn't understand why until he finds out the truth and it might be already too late for them._

* * *

Steve hadn't really been surprised that he woke up the next morning alone. He wasn't surprised but it still hurt him that Natasha left him during the night. He had been looking alone for Bucky because Sam was needed back in DC and then Natasha was suddenly standing in front of his motel room. She gave him new intel about Bucky and he offered her to stay here when she told him that she hadn't looked for a place to sleep. Natasha seemed different that evening, more open and honest. He was over the moon when she suddenly kissed him because he had realized during his trip with Sam that he was in love with Natasha. He didn't know when he fell for her but he knew that his feelings for her were love. They couldn't stop kissing and he slept with her.

It had been his first time but he was too embarrassed to tell her and kept quiet about it. He thought that night had changed something between them and their friendship would change into something more but she was gone the next morning. He didn't know where she went and he had the feeling that she already left Poland by the time he woke up. He wanted to talk to her but he had no phone number to reach her and he also thought that a personal conversation seemed more fitting after what happened between them. He was even tempted to fly back to the States when he heard Tony casually mention that Natasha was currently staying at the Tower. He wanted to go to her to talk about everything and maybe ask her out on a real date because Natasha deserved more than a night in a motel room but he was getting closer to Bucky and he needed to find him.

Eleven days later he tracked down his best friend in Moldavia and Bucky remembered him. He was so happy that he completely forgot about what happened with Natasha and stayed with Bucky in East Europe to destroy HYDRA cells. Bucky had set backs and it took Steve weeks to convince him to come back with him to the States to get the help he needed. Bucky never talked about what HYDRA made him do and he didn't ask. Steve only told him that he didn't had to worry about legal actions since he was already granted amnesty after the world found out who the Winter Soldier really was. He had Bucky expected to be more excited about that but he was guilt-ridden and reminded him of Natasha. Would she be there when he and Bucky flew back to New York next week? Tony was so kind to lend them a private jet so they didn't had to take a regular flight. Would they have even made it through security with Bucky's bionic arm?!

He had been thinking about staying with Buck at the Tower but he feared that the technology would remind him of HYDRA and decided against it. The psychiatrist ,who had helped Natasha after she deflected and Clint after Loki, agreed to come to Steve's apartment for Bucky's appointments. They would go to the Tower though after they landed because Tony had to look at Bucky's arm to see if it needed fixing because he said that the arm sometimes hurt.

The private plane landed on the roof of the Tower where Tony and Sam were waiting for them. Bucky had been nervous during the flight but he assured him that they were friends and he would be safe and had nothing to worry about.

"Does the redhead live here too?"

Steve snapped his head so fast in Bucky's direction, it was a miracle he didn't got whiplash. "Huh?"

"She was with you in DC. I shot her. I've shot her before DC, I think. Is she your friend?"

He didn't really know that anymore. "I don't know if she's here."

He introduced Bucky to Sam and Tony and Tony went with Bucky to his lap to fix his arm. He and Sam went to the common floor in the mean time to catch up. Sam told him that he was going to lead the VA in Brooklyn and was moving from DC to New York. He was happy that Sam was going to live here.

"Have you heard from Natasha?" Sam asked him.

"No." He hadn't heard from her in over three months. She hadn't really stayed in contact with him before they slept together but she did call him from a blocked number from time to time to tell him that she was still alive. "You?"

"A few weeks ago. I come home from work and she's sitting in my living room. Girl almost gave me a heart attack. She said that she had to deal with something in Washington and I let her crash in my guestroom. She looked she wanted to talk about something but she didn't and two days later she was gone. Haven't heard from her since."

Should he tell Sam the truth? It felt like a betrayal to Natasha but he hadn't heard from her or seen her in months and he had to talk about it with someone. Bucky didn't know Nat and he didn't want to burden him with his problem. Sam on the other hand knew Natasha and he didn't have to deal with healing from HYDRA.

"I slept with Natasha." He blurted out before he could stop himself.

Sam almost dropped his bagel. "When?! Sorry, that's none of my business."

"It's fine." It actually felt good to finally talk about it and Sam had way more experience with women than he had. "When I was in Poland. She tracked me down one night with new information on Buck and then it... it just happened. She was gone the next morning. Haven't heard from her since."

"That would explain why she completely ignored my question if she was in contact with you." Sam bit his lip nervously. "I hope I'm not crossing any boundaries but... was that the first time you had sex?"

"That obvious, huh?" He rubbed his hands over his face.

"You did mention you never had luck with the ladies before the serum and then the war happened and when we met it was pretty obvious that you had only eyes for Nat. And you're not the guy to fool around with girls when he has feelings for someone. Did Natasha know it was your first time?"

He didn't really know. On the one had she probably knew that he hadn't much experience because he had been pretty nervous but on the other hand he didn't think she would have slept with him if she had known that he was a virgin. "I have no idea."

"You love her, don't you?"

"Yeah. But it doesn't look like she feels the same. She probably just wanted to unwind. It didn't meant as much to her as it did to me." He really hoped that she would be there the next morning. He thought that finally things changed between them and she let him in. He still wasn't used to sex being a casual thing.

"Maybe. Maybe not." Sam said. "I have the feeling she doesn't even know what she wants. I'm not saying sneaking out was okay but it's probably what she does. Did you ever meet a boyfriend? Or a guy she was seeing?"

"No." He had thought after the Chitauri invasion that Clint was her boyfriend but they both insisted that they were just friends and he believed them.

"I don't want anyone to know what happened between Natasha and me."

"Of course. I wont tell a soul."

Tony fixed Bucky's arm and they left in the evening to get to Steve's apartment in Brooklyn. Tony had been so kind to send some of his staff to clean his place and go grocery shopping. They already ate at the Tower and were about to go to bed after they unpacked their stuff. Bucky didn't have much and Steve planned to order some clothes for him online since he didn't think Buck was ready to go to a mall.

"Steve?"

"Yes?" He was about to go to his bedroom.

"Thank you for everything. I can never repay you."

"You don't have to. I know you would have done the same if the roles were reserved."

* * *

Bucky made a lot of progress in the next weeks and befriended Tony and Sam. He and Buck spent the morning at the Tower to talk about Buck's progress and him and Sam potentially joining the Avengers when Clint suddenly walked through the door. He didn't know why but he checked the door twice to see if Natasha was here as well but she wasn't. He still hadn't heard from her and he wasn't so sure anymore if he wanted to hear from her. He started to regret that he spent the night with her.

"Katniss!" Tony greeted him. "How are you?"

"Good, good." Clint sat down at the table and poured himself coffee. "Had to handle something for Tasha here in town and thought I stop by." He looked at Bucky and offered him his hand. "You must be Barnes. I'm Clint Barton."

Bucky shook his hand. "Nice to meet you. Steve told me about you."

Clint laughed a little. "I hope only good stuff."

So Natasha wasn't in New York? Did Clint know where she was? Was she even in the country? He looked at Clint wondering if he knew that he and Nat had sex. Clint showed no sign that he did but then again he was a spy and knew how to play people.

"Where's Red by the way?" Tony asked and Steve was glad that he didn't have to ask. "I got some new toys for her."

"Doing the Eat, Love, Pray thing but with mayhem and murder." Clint answered casually which Steve couldn't understand. Was she travelling around the world killing people? Enemies who wanted her head? Or was she now an assassin for hire?

"Murder?" Bucky asked uncomfortably.

Clint nodded. "Well, yeah. Fury gave her a list with HYDRA members and Tasha is taking them out one by one."

At least she was ending bad people.

Tony tilted his head. "Why aren't you with her? I thought it was the two of you against the world."

Clint looked almost uncomfortable for a second. "I retired after the whole SHIELD debacle. If Nat needs me, she'll let me know."

Bucky left with Tony to go his lab because Buck had taken a liking to engineering and Tony was teaching him things.

That left Steve alone with Clint at the breakfast table. He was dying to ask him about Natasha. How she was, if she told Clint about what happend between them, had he seen her recently, did she look like she missed him, did she have feelings for Steve? He couldn't get one word out. Even if Clint knew the answers to his questions, he didn't think he would tell him.

Clint refilled his coffee mug and checked his phone with a frown.

"Everything okay?"

"What? Yes, of course." Clint smiled briefly. "How are things with Barnes? He's getting settled in?"

Steve told him about Bucky's progress and that he was thinking about joining the Avengers when the psychiatrist gave her okay. Clint left after breakfast when he got a text that caused him to frown again. Was it Natasha? Did she need help?

Two weeks later Tony managed to track down Loki's scepter that had been stolen by HYDRA during the fall of SHIELD from the Fridge. Thor came from London with Banner in tow who had been in London for work and apparently the two were now best friends. If Steve didn't know better, he would say that Tony was jealous. Sam would look after Bucky while Steve was in Sokovia. They were about to take off when a chopper landed on the roof and Clint got out. And then Natasha. His heart almost stopped at the sight of her. Her hair was shorter but she was still so fucking beautiful and despite what she had done he was still in love with her.

"I thought you wouldn't make it." Tony said and ushered them into the quinjet. Natasha greeted the group with a nod and managed to not look at him during their flight to East Europe. She stayed with Clint in the back of the jet and they were whispering to each other.

They took down a HYDRA cell and got the scepter back without any casualties. They were already on their way back to Manhattan when Tony suggested to have a party before Thor would take the scepter back to Asgard. Natasha was again in the back of the quinjet talking to Clint.

Tony said he wanted to throw a small party but there were easily a hundred people here. Bucky decided to stay in Brooklyn not trusting himself around so many strangers. But Sam came and they were both standing at the banister looking down at the party. Natasha was wearing a tight black dress and talking to Hill and Rhodey.

"Did you two talk?" He knew immediately who Sam was talking about.

"No." He sounded bitter. He was bitter. "She's been avoiding me like the pest. Hasn't said one word to me." He would have never slept with her if he had known what would happen afterwards.

"That sucks, man. I don't know what to tell you. Natasha is different than most people. I don't think she'll talk to you unless she wants to."

"Yeah."

Sam told him that Bucky came to one of the VA meetings and considered going again. He excused himself when he saw someone he knew. Steve was thinking about going to Natasha, Hill and Rhodey but she would probably just leave so she wouldn't have to be close to him.

"Captain Rogers?"

He turned around and Kate, no Sharon was standing in front of him. How did she know Tony? "Sharon, hi. Please call me Steve."

"Steve." She smiled and they talked a bit about her new job with the CIA. She touched his arm from time to time and played with her hair. He knew how to read that, she was interested in him. And when she asked him to get coffee with him, he said yes. He looked over to Natasha who was laughing about something Rhodey said. It was time to move on.

* * *

Steve got coffee with Sharon, he went to the movies with her, they spent a Saturday afternoon at the MoMa, and he took her to a nice restaurant. Sharon kissed him on the cheek after their coffee date, and he got a short kiss after the movies and the visit to the MoMa. She invited him to come inside after they had dinner and he was aware what she was implying with that but he couldn't. He wasn't ready to take that step again. Not how his friendship with Natasha ended after they had sex. Sharon looked disappointed but nodded when he said that he had to go and kissed him good night. He knew he wasn't supposed to compare women but Natasha's kisses had been so much more passionate. He hadn't seen Natasha since the party two weeks ago but he knew that she was in town. Tony mentioned that she and Pepper had met for drinks the other night.

It was only half past ten when he got home from his date with Sharon and Bucky was in the living room watching The Lion King. He developed a thing for Disney movies.

"Hey punk!" Bucky looked at his phone. "You're back early. I kinda assumed you would come back in the morning." He smirked at him.

He shook his head and got to the kitchen to get a beer. He joined Bucky on the couch and watched the movie with him. Natasha was the one who started watching Disney movies with him after she told him to his amazement that Walt Disney had built an entire empire with his work. They got to Lilo & Stitch until SHIELD turned out to be HYDRA.

Bucky looked at him when the credits were rolling. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Why are you going out with that Sharon? You barely talk about her and when you do you don't seem very smitten."

"She's nice." Wow, Steve that sounded really excited.

"Is there someone else?"

Steve shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know. There was someone but that didn't work out."

"You wanna tell me about it?"

"We worked together, became friends and then slept together. She left during the night and now ignores me."

If Bucky was surprised that he wasn't a virgin anymore, he didn't show it. "It's the redhead, isn't it?"

"Yeah."

"You get all tense when someone of your friends mentions Romanoff. You have feelings for her?"

"Yeah, I can't stop loving her. Even after months of no contact."

"That's not fair to Sharon."

He sighed. "I know."

He called Sharon the next morning to tell her that he couldn't see her anymore. She told him that she already had the feeling that he wasn't into her and asked him if they could be friends. Sharon was way nicer than he deserved.

He almost had a heart attack (could he even get one?, someone should look into that) when he walked into the gym at Avengers Tower and Natasha was there beating the living hell out of a punching bag. He almost wanted to leave but he was tired of this game and just wanted to get a workout. He was actually curious to see what Natasha would do when she noticed his presence. Probably ignore him and leave.

She kept punching her target and he walked past by her to get to the weighs. He knew that she knew he was here but she showed no sign that she was acknowledging his presence. He clenched his jaw in frustration and started to lift weighs. Natasha kept beating the shit out of the punching bag and he heard her pant and moan which reminded him of the sounds she made during their night together. It had been four months and it was about time that he snapped. He dropped his weighs and stormed over to her.

"What the fuck, Natasha?!"

She ignored him and kept punching.

"Natasha!" He practically screamed her name.

"What?" She asked annoyed not stopping what she was doing.

He felt himself getting angry. "What does it take for you to look me in the fucking eyes?"

She stopped her workout and turned to look at him. "Happy?"

"Why haven't you talked to me in four fucking months?"

"Why do you care?" Her voice was cold as ice. "You've been quite busy."

Her words had double meaning but he didn't know what it was. "Natasha, we had sex!"

"I know. I was there."

"Why did you just leave in the middle of the night?"

"Why do even care about that? You clearly moved on." She walked over to the bench, grabbed her gym bag and was gone before he could say something. What was that supposed to mean? He wasn't the one who ignored her for months!

He ran after her and grabbed her arm. "Stop running away! We need to talk about what happend! Did that night mean nothing to you?"

"People fuck all the time. It's no big deal." She answered coolly, shook him off and jumped into the elevator before the doors closed.

He had been nearly killed by Bucky in DC but this hurt worse. This whole time he still hoped she had feelings for him but she clearly didn't. It was almost like she hated him. He should have never slept with her. It had ruined everything and he didn't even know why. Even if it was just sex for her, it didn't explain why she was so cold to him now.

He couldn't say he was surprised when he heard two days later that Natasha was out of the country helping Fury with something.

* * *

He was invited to a conference in London and both Pepper and Hill thought it would be a good idea if he went there to give a speech. He reluctantly agreed and flew to London. The speech was a success and gave the Avengers good press around the world.

He was back at his hotel suite after a dinner with the Prime Minister and the Secretary of State ( who mentioned her single daughter quite often) and walked through the living room to get to the bathroom when suddenly someone attacked him. Well, he wasn't sure if it counted as an attack when a person was pressing their lips against your own. He knew from the first touch who was kissing him- Natasha.

He pushed her away. "What the fuck?"

"I like it when you curse." She smirked and then kissed him again.

He pulled away. "Stop it!"

She looked angry. "Don't you want me?"

He ignored her question. "What are you doing here?"

"I was in town. You didn't answer my question, Rogers. Do you want me?"

He knew he was about to make a stupid mistake. But she was here, actually talking to him and at least for now she wanted him. And if that was all she would offer him, he had to take it. "Yes, of course."

She smiled and attacked his lips again. Then everything was a blur of clothes getting thrown around the room, smashing each other into walls and then landing on his hotel bed where they gave into their earthly desires. It wasn't gentle like their first night, they were both angry and bit and scratched each other while chasing their release.

He closed his eyes and pretended to be asleep afterwards and a few minutes later he felt Natasha slip out of the bed. He opened his eyes when she was putting her bra on. She had to leave without her underwear because he ripped them apart earlier.

"Leaving so soon?"

Natasha stopped her movement but didn't turn around to face him. "I didn't think you were awake."

"Would would have stayed otherwise?"

"I shouldn't have come."

"But you did. Twice, I think." At this she did turn around and raised an eyebrow. He knew that had been uncharacteristic of him but he didn't care.

"What do you want me to say, Rogers?"

She called him Rogers again. He had been Steve when he had been inside her half an hour ago. "Why did you show up here? Why are you doing this to me?"

"It takes two to tango, Rogers. I didn't force you!"

"That's not what I meant and you know it."

She stood up and walked to the door frame where her pants were on the floor. She slipped into them and then looked up at him. "I guess...I needed you. I'm sorry, Steve. This isn't fair to you. It won't happen again. I promise. I know you have a girlfriend. I'm sorry I made you cheat on her."

Last time he checked he had no girlfriend. The one woman he wanted to be his girl was clearly not interested in that label. "What?"

She was already out of the room so he followed her. She was in her shirt and boots when he walked into the living room. She looked sad and he didn't know why. She just wanted sex from him and he gave it to her. What was bothering her now?

She slipped her leather jacket on and turned around. "Bye, Rogers."

If he had know that he wouldn't see or hear from her for one whole year, he would have ran after her, naked or not. But he didn't and he watched her close the door behind her leaving him confused and hurt.

* * *

Steve had been going out with a few women in the next twelve months and two times he spent the night with them. He wasn't really proud of it because he did it mostly to stop thinking about Natasha and he wished the whole time it was her with him in bed not his date.

The Avengers relocated to Upper New York where Stark had built a facility and Sam and Bucky officially joined the team. They saved two siblings during a HYDRA raid in Sokovia and Wanda and Pietro Maximoff joined the team as well. They were really a great addition with their powers.

He had been training the recruits (the plan in the long haul was to turn the Avengers into an agency like SHIELD) when a quinjet landed on the airfield. He was more than surprised because no one briefed him that someone would arrive today. He watched how the ramp was getting lowered down while Dr. Cho and her team were running towards the jet. Okay, what was going on? Clint pushed a gurney down the ramp while Fury was holding an IV bag. His eyes moved to the person on the gurney and his heart stopped beating. He almost didn't recognize her because of the bloody state of her face but that was definitely Natasha. What had happened? He ran towards them and followed them into the medical wing of the facility.

Clint pushed her directly into the OR and came a few minutes later back with Fury.

He looked at Fury who had a look on his face he'd never seen before. He looked heartbroken. "I have to make a few calls." And then he was gone.

"What happened?" He asked Clint who sat down in the lounge and rubbed his hands over his face.

"She ended a ten year long nightmare." He gave him a sad smile. "She might not look like it but she won."

He took a seat next to Clint. "Is she gonna make it?"

"I don't know. It's pretty bad."

He closed his eyes for a moment. He had been mad at Natasha for disappearing for a year. No one knew where she was and Tony often joked that she had ran off with Clint who also had been MIA for the last year. But none of the pain he went through mattered now. He still loved her, he would probably always love her and now she could leave him for good. "What happened to her?" He needed answers. And he needed to find whoever did this to her so he could kill them.

Clint sighed and leaned back against his chair. "She doesn't want me to tell you but she's not here to stop me, is she."

He looked at Clint signaling him to continue.

"First of all, I know what happened between you two. She told me." That actually surprised him. He really thought that was a secret Natasha would take to her grave. "You probably think she doesn't feel anything for you because of the way she acted and ignored you but that's not true. I think she's in love with you."

He felt like someone hit him with a tank. That couldn't be possibly true. Why did she leave him if she loved him? "What?"

"Natasha was married before she joined SHIELD."

"What?!" He had no idea.

"Have you ever heard of the Red Guardian?"

He nodded. He stumbled across that name when he had been looking for Bucky. The Red Guardian had been the Russian answer to Captain America. But not once Natasha was mentioned as his wife. "He was her husband?"

"Yeah. They didn't exactly marry out of love. The Red Room offered Natasha as a bride and he accepted her. He didn't love her, he was obsessed with her. Probably thought it was love though."

Rage was coursing through his veins. "Did he do this to her?"

"I'm getting to that part." Clint said but Steve already knew the answer. "Natasha was still brainwashed and played her part as his wife. Then she deflected and we had no idea that she was the Red Guardian's spouse. He went after her and surrounded us in an old warehouse. We fought, there was an explosion and Nat and I thought he died. She got settled in and even met someone. Nice guy. A lawyer/vigilante from Hell's kitchen. She really liked him and maybe over time she would have fallen in love with him. One night while he was out patrolling Hell's Kitchen, he got attacked and was brutally murdered. It was the Red Guardian."

"Oh God!"

"She tried to hunt him down but he knew how to hide from her. He was the one after all who trained her. She grieved Matt and moved on. A few months before Fury ordered her to spy on Stark she met another man. Just your average Joe. Had nothing to do with our line of work. She dated him for three weeks until his body was found in a junkyard."

He started to understand why Natasha had been the way she was with him.

"She stopped dating after that. She tried to find the Guardian. SHIELD helped because Fury wanted him gone, fearing he would come after Natasha. We never found him. Sometimes there were whispers that he had died and I told Natasha to go out to find someone but she didn't want to." Clint gave him a small smile. "And then she met you. And fell for you. She has been fighting her feelings for you for such a long time. She told me she got weak one night and freaked out. She was terrified that the Guardian would find out and come for you."

"I can protect myself." He was Captain America for fuck's sake! He would have protected himself. And her!

"You didn't see what he did to her other boyfriends. Even made my skin scrawl. And I've seen a lot of shit." Clint's eyes were haunted and he believed him. This Guardian must be a monster. "She avoided you at all costs to make sure that no one would think there could be something between you and her. And then she heard you were dating Carter and she was hurt but said it was good that you moved on. And then she confessed that she got weak again and visited you in London." Clint grinned a bit but it faded quickly. "She went after him after that night. She wanted to kill him so he couldn't come after you. She tracked him down two days ago and confronted him yesterday. Fury and I followed her because we already feared it would end badly. She managed to kill him but he got her good." Clint shook his head like he was trying to forget. "I thought she was dead when we found her." He whispered. "I thought he killed her."

This whole time she was protecting him. He thought she only used him and hated him but the truth was she loved him and almost died to save him. She could still die. He felt like crying so he did. Clint rubbed his back and it only made Steve feel worse. Why didn't she tell him? Why did Clint not tell him? Or Fury? He would have gone with her! He would have protected her! He loved her for fuck's sake!

Five long hours later Dr. Cho came out of the OR. He and Clint practically ran her over when they rushed to her side.

"She's stabil."

Those were the greatest news he'd ever heard!

"What aren't you telling us, doc?" Clint asked.

Dr. Cho sighed and looked at them with sympathy in her eyes. "She's stabil. But she's in a coma. We don't when she'll wake up. Or if she'll wake up."

He left the lounge and punched a hole into the wall in the hallway. His hand was bleeding but he didn't care. He didn't care about anything anymore. This just wasn't fair. He finally knew the truth, he finally had her back but she wasn't really back, was she?

* * *

She wanted to sleep longer but a voice told her that she had slept long enough. Something was weighing her down but she fought against it. She didn't want to disappoint the voice. She blinked her eyes open and everything was so bright and white. She heard beeping noises and looked around. She was in a hospital room. _What's the last thing you remember, Natasha?_ She found Alexei. She wanted to finally kill him. To protect Steve. So he didn't had to share Matt and Liam's fate. Did she kill him?

"She's awake!" A voice yelled . People rushed in and checked her vitals. Lit her eyes with a flashlight and asked her to move her limps. The people left after some time and suddenly Tony was standing in front of her hospital bed.

"Cap is gonna be so disappointed that he missed this."

"How long was I out?"

"Eleven weeks." Tony explained and dragged a chair to her bed. "You scared the shit out of us, Natasha. What were you thinking going after that maniac alone?"

"I wanted to protect-"

"Steve. Yeah, we know. Clint told us. Also told us he has a wife and kids. I'm still 59% convinced those are SHIELD agents."

Clint told them about his family? He only told them about them because of her. She felt bad about that. Clint always wanted to keep them out of this. "Where's-?" Clint she wanted to ask but Tony interrupted her.

"Steve? On a mission in Bahrain. With Bucky, Sam and the wonder twins. Clint's in Manhattan but on his way back."

She wasn't at the tower? "Where am I, Tony?"

"Upstate New York. The Avengers facility." Tony got up from his chair. "I'm gonna let you get some rest until Barton shows up." He was already at the door. "Don't ever do something like that again!"

"I won't."

Tony nodded and left.

Clint came two hours later and yelled at her, called her a reckless asshole and warned her that Laura wanted to have a few words with her. Then he started crying and hugged her. It hurt but she let him have this moment. He told her that everyone had been worried sick. Thor even interrupted his quest about the Infinity Stones and returned to Earth to check on her after Heimdall told him what happend. They didn't talk about Steve and she was thankful for that. She knew that Steve now knew the whole truth. About her past and her feelings for feeling. She wondered how much he hated her for lying to him.

Steve burst through the door two days later in his Captain America uniform. He looked like he came right after landing to her. She prepared herself to get yelled at but nothing like that happend.

"Hi." He smiled brightly at her and walked slowly into the room. "It's so good to see you awake."

She was confused. Why wasn't he angry? She lied and played him for almost one and a half year. "Um, hi?"

Steve pointed at the chair next to her bed. "Can I?"

"Of course."

He smiled again and sat down. "How are you?"

"Good. I'm still on the bench for a few weeks. I'll be out of your hair as soon as they discharge me. Don't worry."

Steve's face fell. "You're leaving again?"

"Yes?" Why should she stay? She was a liar. No one would want her to stay here and she'd rather leave on her own than get kicked out.

"Please don't leave. Not again." He whispered. "Please don't leave me again."

"Steve-"

"Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you tell me what was really going on?" He looked so hurt she wanted to cry.

"I was trying to protect you, Steve. I didn't want you to get hurt!"

"I still got hurt. By you."

She couldn't look at him. "I know I'm sorry. But I'd rather have you hate me than you being dead."

"I don't hate you, Nat."

Now she did look at him and there was no hate or anger in his eyes. "You don't?"

"No. I was angry and confused when I had no idea why you were colder to me than Siberia in winter. And then I was angry and confused when Clint told me the truth. You should have told me about the Red Guardian, Nat. I would have helped you stop him."

"No." She shook her head so violently she got dizzy. "You don't know what he did to the others. He practically butchered them. I couldn't risk your life. I'm sorry I hurt you but I'm not sorry for protecting you."

He looked like he wanted to argue but he only shook his head lightly. "Are you going to stay? There's always room for the Black Widow on the team."

"I...I think about it, okay?"

She could see that he was disappointed. "Okay." He took a deep breath. "And what about us?"

Her heart pounded hard in her chest at his words. _Us._ "Do you even want there to be an us?"

"Yes, I do. I tried to stop loving you but I can't."

"You love me? After everything I did?"

"Yes, and I don't think I'll ever stop." He smiled at her.

She couldn't tell him that she loved him. She knew that Alexei was dead but there was still the fear that he would go after Steve if she said it out loud. "I...My heart always belonged to you."

He was beaming at her and for the first time in a very long time she was happy.

"Do you mind if I go shower and get changed and then come back? We could order something and talk more?"

She hadn't smiled in months but now she had a reason for it. "Yes, I'd love that."


	34. Steve's birthday

**_As always thank you for your reviews, faves and follows!_**

 _Steve turns 100 and Tony throws him a party in Mexico. Thor brings out the Asgardian mead and Steve gets drunk and tells Natasha things he'd rather kept to himself._

* * *

Steve hated his birthday, he always had. Back in the day when his ma was still alive he hated his birthday because he had seen how sad his mother was that she couldn't buy him gifts or sometimes couldn't even make him a cake. It didn't matter that he told he that he didn't care about these things, he could see that she was ashamed that she couldn't offer him more. And after the serum he hated his birthday because everyone had a field day with the fact that Captain America was born on the Fourth of July.

And this year he was turning 100! The major wanted to throw a big party so New York could celebrate with him and he feel honored but that was not what he wanted. He didn't want to celebrate at all but if he had to then with his friends and not hundreds of strangers. He didn't know how they did it but Pepper and Natasha managed to talk the major out of it and now the plan was to fly the whole team to Mexico where Tony had a mansion. He liked the idea and was looking forward to a few days of vacation.

The whole team was here in Mexico and that's all what he wanted for his birthday, to be surrounded by the people he loved. Even Thor was currently on Earth and came with them to Mexico to celebrate his birthday. With Thor and Bucky there, he wouldn't be the oldest person in the room. Everyone asked him what he wanted for his birthday but he didn't need anything. He had everything he wanted. Bucky was back and safe, he could help people, he had a nice home and friends who saw more in him than the shield he was carrying on his back. Well, there was one thing he wanted, more than anything to be honest but it wasn't something they could just get him. He didn't even know if there was even a tiny chance that she wanted the same.

He was enjoying the view over the ocean when someone knocked on his door. "It's open!"

"Hey, punk!" Bucky walked in. "Happy birthday!"

He turned to face him. "Thank you."

Bucky gave him a hug and told him that he would give him his present later at the party.

"You didn't have to get me anything."

"I know." Bucky nodded. "That gift is only my second choice though. I asked Romanoff if she would jump out of a cake in a USA bikini but she said no."

"What?!" He looked at Bucky whose face was completely serious. "Please tell me you didn't ask her that!"

Bucky laughed. "You should have seen your face! Of course not! It might not look like it but I don't have a death wish." Bucky smirked. "But you would have liked that as a gift, wouldn't you?"

"NO!" He said way too quickly. Okay, he would have liked that very much but that was besides the point. He didn't want to objectify Natasha. Yes, she was beautiful and had a body he desperately wanted to explore but she was so much than her looks.

"Why don't you ask Romanoff to be your date for the party?"

He had thought about it but she would probably say no. He shook his head. "She wouldn't want to be my date."

"But what if she did?"

Then it would be officially the greatest birthday ever but he knew he wasn't that lucky. In what world would Natasha Romanoff date him?

The whole team spent the day on Tony's yacht where he tried his best not to stare too much at Natasha who was sunbathing on the deck. And no matter what she had said she looked incredible in a bikini.

"You're not being very sneaky if I can catch you ogling." Tony laughed and handed him a mimosa. Not that it would make him drunk but he liked the taste.

He decided to play dumb. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Tony only chuckled. "I hope you're not planning on giving up the shield to start a Hollywood career 'cause that wasn't convincing at all, Cap."

He didn't say anything in response and took a sip from his drink. He had been told before that he was a terrible liar. Natasha's eyes met his and she gave him her signature half-smirk. He really sometimes wondered if she could read minds. He hoped she couldn't because then she knew that he was in love with her and he really didn't want her to know that. It would make things weird between them and he wanted her in his life, even when it was just as a friend.

Tony's staff used the time the team was on the yacht to turn the mansion into a club. They had an amazing dinner where he got his presents and then went to the living room that looked now like a club to celebrate. He still couldn't believe what Natasha got him. He had no idea how she even found it but it was the best present anyone could have ever gotten him. He had opened the present, gasped and looked at Natasha who gave him a little smile.

"You like it?"

He was so touched he couldn't speak and nodded. He closed the present again even though the others wanted to know what Natasha got him. She somehow managed to find the only photo ever taken of him and his mother. He remembered how long his ma had to save the money for it. She died four months after the picture was taken. He told SHIELD and the Smithsonian about the photo hoping they could track it down if it still existed but they didn't find it. But Natasha did. She found it and gave it back to him. There was no way he could ever pay her back. Her birthday was in four months, he really had to start to come up with a great gift for her.

Then Thor brought out the Asgardian mead and Steve didn't hold back.

* * *

Natasha was reminiscing with Maria and Clint about the good old SHIELD days when Steve made a beeline straight to them. She was so relieved that he liked her present. She had been racking her brain for weeks to find the perfect gift for him. Steve would turn only 100 once and he was so important to her. She was thinking about getting him a new bike but that wasn't personal enough for her. And then she remembered how he tried to find the photo of him and his mother and she knew she had to find it for him. She had to call in a lot of favors and had to threaten some people to get it back but the look on Steve's face was worth it.

"Natasha!" Steve yelled when he reached them. He must have noticed that he was a bit loud." Natasha." He whispered. "Dance with me!"

"No one's dancing, Steve."

He shrugged his shoulders and was already dragging her by her hand to the dance floor. Music was playing but the others were mostly sitting on couches or standing talking to each other. "Um, I don't know how to dance." He mumbled out and it almost sounded like he was slurring. Was he drunk? No, that couldn't be. The serum burned the alcohol before it could intoxicate him. His hands were suddenly on her waist. Okay, maybe he was a bit tipsy? "Can you teach me how to dance? I always wanted to ask you!"

"Well, it is your birthday, so I guess I kinda have to." She smiled up at him because she was still shorter than him even in her stilettos. Stupid serum!

His eyebrows were furrowed. "You never have to do something you don't want to. Not with me."

Her heart fluttered but she ignored it. "I know, Steve. I was just joking. Let's teach you some moves."

He nodded eagerly and some schmaltzy song came on. She had the sneaking suspicion that was Clint's doing. He was the only one who wasn't afraid of her. She wrapped her arms around Steve's neck and swayed with him to the music. He was stiff in the beginning but with her help he was moving to the rhythm. He had potential, maybe he wanted her to teach him more dances. She really liked the idea of dancing tango with him. It was basically foreplay with the right partner. Woah, stop right there, Natasha! Steve would never talk to her again if he knew that she sometimes thought about them being naked doing things platonic friends shouldn't do. She wasn't delusional, she knew that Steve wasn't interested in her like that. She sometimes caught him looking at her like he wanted more but she knew she was just projecting.

The music changed into club music and the others joined them on the dance floor. She was more and more convinced that Steve was drunk because he spun her around, pulled her back against his chest and danced with her to the beat. His hands were on her waist and not even a piece of paper would fit between them. She liked this more than she should and tried to move a bit away but Steve had a death grip on her and she stayed where she was. Well, if this was what he wanted...It was his birthday after all.

His mouth was suddenly next to her ear. "You look amazing tonight." He laughed a little. "Well, you always look amazing." She felt his noise against her head. "And you smell so good."

Don't read anything into it, Romanoff! He just dancing because it's his party, nothing more! Steve's hand moved to her stomach and thanks to the high waist skirt and crop top combo she was wearing she could feel his warmth on her skin. His thumb moved under her top and brushed her skin.

"Okay?"

"Yeah." Her whole body was on fire. She looked around but no one was paying attention. She couldn't believe what was happening right now. Maybe she could give Steve another present in the bedroom? Okay, don't get ahead of yourself, Romanoff!

Thor was suddenly standing next to them and held up a flask,clearly unaware of what was happening between her and Steve . "Another round, Steve?"

His thumb stopped moving and he removed his hand from her stomach. He stepped away from her. "Um yes, sure."

Steve smiled at her and then walked with Thor to the bar. Clint was suddenly taking her hand and spun her around. "Looks like you're having lots of fun, Tasha!"

"Shut up!" She growled causing her best friend to smirk. Too bad Laura wasn't here to control her husband.

"You planing on giving Steve another present?" He dug his finger into the elastic of her skirt and let it snap against her skin. "You wearing his colors underneath that? Captain America lingerie?"

She twisted his arm behind his back. "Keep talking and the next thing coming out of your mouth will be your teeth!"

He only chuckled and got out of her hold. "Cute, Tasha. I guess I owe Laura a children-free weekend now."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing." His grin got wider and he left her on the dance floor with her thoughts. Steve ,as the birthday boy, was quite popular and she saw how he took shots with Thor, Tony and Sam. Thor and Steve were drinking the stuff Thor brought with him. Maybe Steve was a bit drunk after all. Rhodey and Wanda were talking to Steve the last time she saw him before she stepped on the terrace of the mansion. It was getting hot inside and she needed fresh air. She could hear the ocean and the wind cooled her down. She should probably stay away from Steve before he did something he would regret the next morning and Natasha had only so much willpower. How were you supposed to stay calm if a hot and cute super soldier was basically feeling you up on the dance floor?! She was only human after all.

"Nat!"

So much for avoiding him. She turned around and Steve was a bit stumbling when he came to her. Wow, Thor's stuff was really strong. "There you are!" He beamed at her and she ignored the warm and fuzzy feeling in her gut. That was just the alcohol. His hand was suddenly on her cheek and she caught herself leaning into his cupped hand. "You're so pretty, Nat. The prettiest! I sketch you all the time." He was giggling now. "Ups! I shouldn't have told you that. It's a secret!"

"Really?"

Steve nodded. "Yeah, but don't tell anyone!" His thumb brushed over her cheekbone and she closed her eyes. It felt so good to be touched by him like that. "I think about you all the time, Nat. You're always on my mind. You are so brave and kind. And smart. So beautiful, from inside and outside." She opened her eyes and he looked at her with fondness and awe. No one had ever looked at her like that but his eyes were glassy and a bit unfocused and she reminded herself that he was drunk and not himself. "And you're so sexy." He blushed but kept talking. "I've never seen a more beautiful and sensual woman than you." His hand moved a bit lower and now his thumb was stroking her lower lip. She didn't know what was going on but she felt like she was in a trance. "I wanna kiss every inch of your body. Can I kiss you, Natalia?"

She didn't know what made her do it. Was it the way he was looking at her, the way he touched her, what he just said or that he used her Russian name? Probably all of it combined. She wrapped her hands around his neck and pressed her lips against his. He moaned into the kiss and pushed her against the wall behind her. She could taste the Asgardian mead on his lips and tongue and it made her dizzy but she loved it. Kissing him was better than she could have ever imagined. The kiss was deep, wet and hungry. His hands were all over her body and ended up on her ass and he pressed her even more against him. He was poking into her stomach and God bless America! She dug her nails into his scalp and he moaned into her mouth. She was thinking about how they could sneak to her room without their friends noticing because she had never been more turned on in her life when they got caught.

"Hey, guys!" Sam's voice was suddenly out on the terrace. "Oh fuck! Sorry!"

She and Steve jumped away from each other and she could see Sam walking back inside. Oh God! What was she doing? Steve was drunk and she was making out with him? She couldn't take advantage of him like that! What was wrong with her? Steve looked like he wanted to push her back against the wall but it was wrong. He wasn't himself, he didn't really want this. The alcohol was making him do it.

She shook her head and stepped away from him. "Happy birthday, Steve!" She hastily said and ran back inside straight to her room ignoring Steve yelling after her. She took advantage of a drunk Captain America, that was a new low for her.

* * *

Steve woke up the next morning with a headache and emptied every water bottle he could find in his room. He already felt better after that. Last night was a great party, he got presents, had fun and then Thor shared his flask with him. And then...he didn't remember anything else. He just hoped he didn't embarrass himself.

He went downstairs to the kitchen where Sam was sitting at the table eating breakfast. The rest of the team wasn't here yet. Who knew how long they celebrated.

"Morning Sam." He went to the counter to get some coffee.

"Hiya Steve." Sam smiled and bit into his muffin. "I'm sorry again."

"Hm?"

"You know for walking in on you. Don't worry I didn't tell anyone what I saw. I figured you wanted to keep it between the two of you for now."

What was Sam talking about? What happened last night? "Huh?"

"You and Natasha?!" Sam gave him a funny look. "Making out on the terrace like horny teenagers?!"

He almost dropped his coffee mug. "Please tell me you're messing with me right now!"

"What?" Sam's eyes widened. "Oh God, please don't tell me you don't remember? How much did you have of Thor's magic juice? I've been waiting forever for you two to get together!"

He had no idea that Sam was this invested in his love life. He put the coffee mug on the table and left the kitchen. He had to talk to Natasha. What happened after Sam walked in? Did he sleep with her? Did he finally have sex with her and now he didn't remember it? He tried to remember and he thought that he and Nat had been dancing. What happened then? Did they go outside and kiss? Maybe they didn't spend the night together because he woke up alone. But Natasha kissed him since it takes two people to make out so did that mean she had feelings for him?

He was finally in front of her door and wanted to walk in but stopped himself. No, he had no right to just barge in. He knocked on the door and a few moments later it got opened.

Natasha was still in her sleeping clothes and rubbed her eyes. "Oh!" She said when she saw who was in front of her.

"Um, Nat..." God, what was he supposed to say? "Um...did we have sex?" He wanted to punch himself for asking that.

Natasha stared at him. "What? Of course not! What do you think of me? That I would sleep with you when you can't give consent?" She looked angry. Rightfully so.

"I'm sorry that's not how I meant it! Sam told me that we kissed and...and I don't remember it. I am sorry."

Natasha raised an eyebrow. "For kissing me or for not remembering it?"

"For not remembering it. And for kissing you if it was something you didn't want."

Natasha was smiling now and he didn't know how to interpret that. Was it a good sign? "You said some nice things about me. Did you mean them?"

"Um, I mean if they were nice then yes?" Oh God, what had he said last night? Did he drunkenly confess his love for her?

"Well you said that I was very pretty. The prettiest actually. And that you draw me all the time. And that you can't stop thinking about me. Is that true?"

What was the point in lying now and she kind of looked like she liked hearing those things. "Yes, it's true."

"And you said that I'm very sexy." Natasha smirked and he felt a full body blush coming. "And that you want to kiss every inch of my body. Also still true?"

He was never gonna drink Asgardian mead again! "Um...yes."

Her hands were on his arms and wandered up to his neck. "Good. You wanna kiss every inch of my body now? Maybe you'll remember it this time."

"Huh?" His brain stopped working.

"Can I kiss you, Steven?"

He remembered now. _Can I kiss you, Natalia?_ Then she had kissed him. "Yes."

She smiled brightly at him and leaned up to close the space between them. She kissed him softly and gently while pulling him into her room. He closed the door behind them and lowered her onto her bed where she let him kiss every inch of her body.

Four months later on her birthday he took her on a romantic trip to Paris where he told her for the first time that he loved her. He already knew what he would get her for her next birthday. A diamond ring.


	35. Lunch break (AU)

_AU: Steve eats every day during lunch break at the same bistro and sometimes he sees a beautiful redhead there. He really wants to ask her out but he's too shy and so he draws her._

* * *

Steve really hoped the beautiful redhead would be at her regular table eating lunch today. Sometimes she was alone and sometimes she was there with friends or colleagues. He figured that she had to work in one of office buildings like he did. Seeingher during lunch break was the highlight of his day. He really wished he had the courage to walk over to her to get to know her. She was so beautiful and her laugh made him happy.

He ordered a chicken sandwich and a soup and sat down at his table and got out his sketchbook. He was working as an illustrator but he still loved to draw during his breaks. He know how lucky he was that he got to do something he loved and made money with it. He didn't think he would got a job right after leaving the army after two tours but he did and now worked at the biggest publishing company in the country. He had a good life now and he wished his ma was still alive to see how far he'd come. His phone buzzed with a text from his best friend asking him to meet him tonight for drinks and Bucky casually mentioned that he met someone perfect for Steve. He rolled his eyes and put the phone back on the table. Bucky had been trying for months to set him up with pretty much every woman he knew but they weren't the right fit.

He glanced at the table cross the bistro near the windows but the redhead wasn't here yet. Maybe she wouldn't come today. She wasn't everyday here like him and he didn't even know why he got his hopes up. A woman like her had to have a boyfriend ( she wasn't wearing a ring on her left hand, he checked) and or at least got asked out a dozen times every day. He wasn't exaggerating when he said that she was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. And she was kind. He never spoke to her but he watched how she bought a couple of meals and gave them to the homeless people sitting in the park across the street.

Steve brought his pencil to paper and began sketching her. He didn't even know when he started drawing her but most of his private sketches were now of the beautiful stranger. His problems were her eyes, he'd never been close enough to her to see her eye color. He thought they were green but sometimes they looked blue from afar. He was currently trying to bring her curly hair to life when someone was looming over him throwing a shadow onto his paper.

"You forgot a beauty mark on my right cheek."

Fuck! He never really heard her voice before, only her laugh when she was with friends but he knew immediately who was behind him. The beautiful redhead.

"Um..." He turned around and he was sure he was as red as a tomato. He had no right to draw her, god she must think he was a complete creep.

She smirked at him and he finally knew her eye color. Her eyes were green. "I caught you looking at me a few times. Now I know why. You make me look better than I actually do, so thanks."

"What? No, you're so beautiful!" God, he sounded like a complete moron. He was surprised that she hadn't hit him with her purse yet.

She gave him a genuine smile and he was amazed that he didn't fall off the chair. "Thanks. Well, see you around, talented stranger."

He wanted to ask her what her name was or if he could give her his number but he only nodded like an idiot and watched her leave the bistro. She had a plastic bag with her that she gave to the homeless in the park and then she was out of his view. This had been his chance to talk to her and he blew it.

* * *

Bucky bombarded him with more texts telling him that this girl was out of the world and a total knock out. When he texted back asking him why he didn't date the "most perfect girl ever" not himself, Buck admitted that they went on a date but there was no spark. But he was sure that she was the right one for Steve. Did Bucky run out of female friends and now had to set him up with his failed dates?

Since he had no plans for the evening he agreed to meet Bucky and his former date so Buck would stop bugging him. He drove home after work to freshen up and changed into slacks and a blue dress shirt and took his Harley to get to the bar Bucky told him to meet them at.

His best friend was already there and waving from a table at him. Did the girl bail? Wouldn't be the first time a woman didn't want to meet him.

"Hey, punk." Bucky gave him a half hug and he sat down on the other side of the table. "Natasha's powdering her nose. She'll be right back."

Natasha. A pretty name. He'd never met a Natasha before. He didn't think it would spark with the woman but maybe he would have another friend by the end of the evening.

Bucky told him about his upcoming promotion at work and that he was thinking about learning a new language. Maybe Russian. "Natasha speaks Russian, too. She's from there originally. Believe me Stevie, most beautiful girl you've ever seen."

He was pretty sure that the redhead from the bistro was the most beautiful girl but everyone had a different taste. "You sure you want me to date this Natasha?"

"Hey, if it didn't work with me, I have to at least make sure that she finds a decent guy. And you're the best man I know, Stevie. A woman like her probably meets a lot of assholes in her life."

He ordered a whiskey when the waiter bought a bourbon for Bucky and a martini for Natasha.

"Ah, there she is!" Bucky pointed at someone behind Steve. He turned around and there was only a middle-aged woman. Was Bucky messing with him? That woman was a bit too old for him, he wanted to get married and have kids in the future. The woman moved to the sight and behind her was the redhead from the bistro. What was she doing her? Wait, was she Bucky's failed date? Was her name Natasha? Did he finally know her name?

He was still staring at her when she reached the table and sat down next to Bucky. She smirked at him, clearly amused. "Hi, talented Stranger, What a small world, huh?"

He was still so shocked, he lost the ability to speak.

"You two know each other?"

Natasha took a sip from her drink. "We eat at the same bistro during our breaks."

Bucky looked delighted. "That's amazing! I guess I can leave you two alone then 'cause I see a pretty lady over there." He took his drink and got up. "Have fun, kids." And he was gone.

"James told me you work as an illustrator?"

James? Right, Bucky. "Um, yes. At SHIELD & Coulson. For three years now."

"That's very impressive. I'm a lawyer at Stark Industries. Our buildings are right next to each other. We're practically neighbors."

"Look, I'm sorry for drawing you without your permission. That was wrong, I had no right. I'm sorry."

"Did you draw nudes of me?"

"God, no! Of course not! I would never do that!"

She smiled. "Relax, Steve. I was just kidding. I'm flattered, really. And James assured me that you are the best guy he ever met, so it's fine. The drawing I saw today was really beautiful."

"Thank you, Natasha." He liked saying her name and he really liked how his name sounded coming from her lips.

"What made you draw me?" She tilted her head. "There are more people than just me at the bistro."

He played with the napkin his drink was on. "You have such a beautiful face. My fingers were basically itching to draw you. And I saw how you got the people in the park lunch. You just captivate me, Natasha. From the moment I first saw you."

She gave him a beautiful smile. "Wow, you really know what to say to a woman, don't you?"

"Hah, actually no."

She raised an eyebrow. "Really? Well in that case, lucky me."

"No, I'm the lucky one. I wanted to talk to you for ages but I couldn't find the courage to do it."

"And here I thought you weren't interested in me like that. I noticed you too, you know?" She picked the olive from her martini and plopped it into her mouth. "I'm starving to be honest. There's this restaurant down the street that makes the best kung pao chicken outside China. You wanna go there?"

"Now?" She nodded. "Okay, let me just tell Bucky we're leaving and then we can go."

He found Bucky making out with pretty girl against a wall and told him that he was leaving with Natasha. He gave him a thumbs up and then continued to make out with the girl. He shook his head and walked back to Natasha and helped her into her coat. They walked the few meters to the restaurant talking about their jobs and he got to learn more about Natasha during dinner. Her parents moved with her to the States when she was still a toddler and worked hard to get her the best education possible. He felt a bit intimated when she told him that she graduated from Yale Law School (he was pretty sure he read somewhere it was the best one in the country) but she was so nice and funny that he didn't care that she was smarter than him. She didn't seem to care about it either and asked him to tell him about his ma. The dinner was amazing and ended way too soon. He took Natasha home on his bike and she typed her number into his phone. He got a kiss on the cheek and he watched her walk into the lobby. He knew it was pretty early but he was sure that he was already falling in love with her.

The next day during lunch break he and Natasha sat at the same table and she kissed his cheek again before she disappeared into her building. But before that she made him promise to pick her up with his Harley when they were gonna go the movies tonight. He picked her up and he liked the way she snuggled up against him on their way to Brooklyn. There was this old cinema that was perfect for a date. They shared a big pizza before the movie and he had to smile when Natasha leaned her head on his shoulder during the movie. It was crazy but he felt so comfortable with her like they had known each other for ages.

When they were outside the cinema Natasha grabbed the collar of his leather jacket and kissed softly. The kiss got more heated and deeper until Steve remembered that they were in public. He pulled away and they were both out of breath. He had to hand it to her, she was an amazing kisser.

"Don't tell me public display of affections makes you uncomfortable, Rogers." She looked up to him with a smirk on her face.

"A little bit." He admitted and she gave him a short kiss.

"So, I remember you telling me that you live in Brooklyn. You wanna show me your place?"

"You sure?" A gentleman always asked.

"Yes."

"Okay, I'd love that."

Natasha was already awake when he woke up the next morning. She smiled at him and gave him a quick kiss. "Do you have paper and pencils in your bedroom?"

"Hm? Yeah, why?" He was kind of hoping she wanted to continue where they left off last night or he could make her breakfast.

She pulled the sheets away to reveal her gorgeous naked body. She truly was a goddess. "Draw me like one of your French girls, Steve."

He snorted. What a dork! "That was terrible!"

"So you gonna draw me or not?"

He rolled his eyes at her and kissed her before he got out of bed to get his sketch book and pencils. He really owed Bucky one for introducing him to his dream girl.

* * *

 _Do you still enjoy these one shots? The last one shot got almost no feedback and a lot of people read it. I don't have to keep posting if no one enjoys them. So let me know what you think._


	36. Crossfire

_AN: Oh my God, never in a million years would I have thought that I would get that response! Thank you so, so much! Really, I was blown away! THANK YOU SO MUCH!_

 _I had this one shot in my draft for some time now and edited and changed a few bits and thought I publish it to show you that I'll keep posting now that I know that you still like these one shots._

 _A new multi-chapter story is in the works._

* * *

 _Natasha shows up in Siberia and gets caught in the crossfire between Tony, Steve and Bucky._

* * *

A week ago Natasha's life had een good, really good. She had been co-leading the Avengers with Steve and their missions went smoothly and she liked living at the base with the others. For the first time she felt like she belonged somewhere. But then Lagos happened, then the Accords, then Vienna and then Leipzig. And now everything had gone to shit. She didn't regret letting Steve and his buddy , not one bit but she regretted what it cost her. She couldn't go back, her life as an Avenger was done. That part of her life was over. Ross knew that she let Steve and Barnes escape and she was now a fugitive as well. Tony was mad at her, Rhodey could be paralyzed and Sam, Clint, Wanda were on their way to the Raft. All she wanted was for them to stay together! That was the whole fucking reason why she signed those damn Accords! She would have to call in a lot of favors to break her friends out of prison. And that Ant-Man guy of course. But right now she needed to help Steve take out these Winter Soldiers. Who knew if Barnes got a set back and then it was Steve against six. No, she couldn't let that happen. He meant too much to her to let him face that alone. She checked the GPS-tracker she threw at Steve's shield when he and Barnes passed by her in the hangar and took one of the quinjets Fury had hidden all over Europe to get to Siberia.

Steve's quinjet was already there when she landed and she spotted one of Tony's choppers. Great, so he was here as well. It was definitely helpful that Iron Man was here to deal with the Winter Soldiers but he was definitely in a bad mood, probably feeling betrayed by everyone. She walked through the snow into the facility and got her Glocks out of the thigh holsters. Zemo probably had already woken up the Winter Soldiers.

"There's a truce here." She heard Tony's voice echo through the hall. Well, at least that was something. She hoped her arrival wouldn't complicate things.

She walked around the corner and saw Steve and Tony standing in front of each other. Barnes was a few meters away on a staircase now pointing his (she was pretty sure it was actually _her_ ) rifle at her.

"Hi, boys."

Steve and Tony looked at her and Steve signaled his friend to lower his gun. Tony furrowed his eyebrow. "What are you doing here?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "Well, last time I checked I was Russian and I thought it was time to visit Mother Russia again. Fancy meeting you all here."

Tony clenched his jaw but didn't say anything. Steve gave her a little smile and she was glad that things still seemed to be the same between them. She could live if Tony never forgave but Steve hating her...That was a thought she couldn't bear.

She followed them through a corridor and mentally prepared herself for combat. Taking out five Winter Soldiers wouldn't be easy.

"I got heat signatures." Tony announced when they reached a big open hall.

"How many?" She and Steve asked at the same time.

"Uh, one."

Just one? Did Zemo leave one behind and took the other four with him? What exactly was going on here? They entered another chamber and the lights went on. In front of them were five cryo chambers and the Winter Soldiers were still in them. She took a closer look, they were dead. That didn't make any sense.

"If it's any comfort they died in their sleep." A male voice was echoing through the room. It had to be Zemo. "Did you really think I wanted more of you?"

"What the hell?" Barnes asked besides her and she had to agree. What the fuck was going on? Why bring them here to find already dead super soldiers? What was his MO?

"I'm grateful to them though. They brought you here." Zemo was now looking through the window of the control room. Steve threw his shield at the glass but it didn't break. What a coward, hiding behind reinforced glass. " Please, Captain. The Soviets built this chamber to withstand the launch blast of UR-100 rockets."

"I bet I can beat that." Tony mocked and she really wanted him to. She hated Zemo more and more by the second and she still hadn't figured out what his plan was.

"Oh, I'm sure you could, Mr. Stark. Given time. But then you'd never know why you came."

"You killed innocent people in Vienna just to bring us here?" Steve walked closer to the control room and looked at Zemo through the window.

"I thought about nothing else for over a year. I studied you. I followed you. But now that you're standing here, I just realized... there's a bit of green in the blue of your eyes. How nice to find a flaw."

Natasha didn't like where this was going. Zemo clearly still had an ace up his sleeve.

"You're Sokovian. Is that what this is about? You lost someone?"

Zemo wanted revenge. This was not good, someone hellbent on revenge was unpredictable and ruthless.

"I lost everyone. And so will you. An empire toppled by its enemies can rise again. But one which crumples from within? That's dead... forever." An old screen turned on and it showed a surveillance footage from December 1991. Fuck, she knew what the footage would show. That had been Zemo's plan all along and she had no doubt that it would work.

"I know that road. What is this?" Tony asked while staring at the screen. Steve watched Tony with unease and Bucky looked away. This was the moment that would change everything. There was no coming back from this. Zemo had won. They watched how the Winter Soldier killed both Howard and then Maria Stark before he destroyed the surveillance cam.

Tony lunged towards Barnes but Steve stopped him. "Did you know this?"

"I didn't know it was him." Steve was still a horrible liar.

"Don't bullshit me, Rogers. Did you know this?"

"Yes."

Rage was flickering through Tony's eyes and she didn't know how to calm him down. She and Steve never talked about what Zola showed them two years ago, they silently agreed to not tell Tony about it and now they had to pay the price.

"Tony?" She asked calmly but he practically growled at her.

"Did you know about this too?"

There was no reason to lie to him. "It was implied by Zola when SHIELD fell."

He clenched his jaw and put his face plate back on. The energy blast he sent towards them threw her, Steve and Barnes off their feet. Barnes opened fire but Tony deflected the bullets and disarmed him. Before she or Steve could do anything, Tony grabbed Bucky and slammed him into a wall. There was no chance to talk Tony out of it. They had to stop him before he killed Barnes out of rage. Steve threw his shield in Tony's direction to distract him from Barnes. Tony was now lunging towards Steve and she fired at him to stop him. She understood that Tony was furious and felt betrayed but they had to stop him before he did something that he would regret for the rest of his life. Killing Barnes, and possibly killing Steve, wouldn't bring back his parents. Tony picked a piece of metal up and threw it at her. She barely managed to jump out of the way. All sanity had clearly left him. He was out for blood.

Steve attacked Tony again but Barnes ran towards them and threw Tony off of Steve. Tony punched Barnes so hard that the floor was splattered with blood. A grenade shot out of his suit but Barnes dodged the attack and it destroyed the wall behind him. Pipes were exposed and bricks and metal were laying around.

"Get out of here!" Steve yelled and tackled Tony to the ground.

"No!" She yelled back and ran towards him and Tony. Steve yelled Barnes' name and he suddenly had his hand wrapped around her upper arm and stopped her.

"Let's go!" He was dragging her away and she tried to shake him off.

"We have to help him!"

"You heard him." They were almost at the exit. "We need to get to the quinjet to get more weapons." She knew that Barnes was right but it was so hard for her to just leave Steve alone with Tony's wrath. Steve was suddenly screaming in pain and she managed to shake Barnes' grip on her off and ran to him. She didn't know what she would do but she had to stop Tony before he seriously hurt Steve.

"Stop it!" She screamed when she almost reached them. She couldn't think of anything better than trying to pry Tony off Steve with her bare hands but he hit her with the full strength of his Iron Man suit when she touched his shoulder. God, that hurt! He sent her flying backwards through the room and then the air was knocked out off her and she felt pain she never experienced before. She looked down and saw a pipe poking out of her stomach. Fuck! She got impaled on one of the pipes the explosion from earlier exposed. She was shaking and bit her lip. God, it hurt so fucking much! Blood was dripping out of her mouth and she had problems to breathe. She was dying, wasn't she?

"Stop!" Bucky screamed. "Don't you see what you've done!"

She tried to keep her eyes open and saw how Tony stopped beating the shit out of Steve and looked over. She closed her eyes and when she opened them Steve was by her side.

"Nat?" Steve's eyes were glistening. He had such pretty eyes. Did she ever tell him that? "Nat, stay with me! Okay? It's gonna be okay!"

She tried to laugh but she only spit blood on Steve's suit. She really thought she would go out with more style. "You're still a horrible liar." She managed to touch his cheek despite getting weaker. She didn't have much longer, she could feel it. "It's okay, Steve. It really is. I always thought I would die alone but I'm not. Because you...you're here." Speaking got harder. He placed his hand over hers on his cheek. "You're here and that's...that's all...that matters. Your...your eyes...really pretty." She could barely keep her eyes open.

"Natasha, please! Don't leave me. I need you!" She wanted to tell Steve that she didn't want to leave him but she was too weak. "Nat, please. Fight it! Don't leave me!"

She saw something black coming towards them, a completely black figure. Was that Death? Did the Angel of Death really exist? The figure came closer and looked like a cat. What? She blinked her eyes open and saw how the face of the figure changed. Now he looked like T'challa. Huh? Why did Death take his form? She tried to tell Steve but she was too tired, so fucking tired. She just wanted the pain to stop.

"I think I can help." Death said and sounded a lot like T'challa. "We have to get her off the pipe first."

"Are you crazy?" That sounded like Tony. Why did he hear Death, too?! "That will kill her!"

"We have to be quick. I have something that will stop the bleeding for now and stabilize her spine so we can get her to Wakanda. My sister can heal her."

Death had a sister? What was going on?

"Okay." That sounded like Steve. How she loved his voice. How she loved him. She would miss him so much. Suddenly hands were on her and she was moved. The pain was getting worse and she screamed. Something was suddenly inside her and it was so cold and hot at the same time. She tried to move away but the hands were stronger.

"It's okay, Miss Romanoff. This will help you. Don't fight it."

She opened her eyes and Steve was looking down at her and then everything went black.

* * *

Bucky felt like he shouldn't be here but Steve asked him to watch over Romanoff and so he did. They brought her to Wakanda with Steve holding her small and pale hand between his own and never taking his eyes off her. Whatever that weird orb from T'challa's bracelet was, it saved Romanoff's life and made it possible to get her to Wakanda where T'challa's little sister somehow managed to heal her. There wouldn't even be a scar and Romanoff would be completely fine when she would wake up.

Shuri told him that she could find a way to remove his triggers and he believed her. What she had done with Romanoff was practically magic. He wanted to go back into cryo until Shuri had found a way but Steve asked him to stay with Romanoff while he and Stark went to the Raft to free their friends. Stark had completely changed after what happened to her and followed them to Wakanda and waited for news on her. He ignored him and Bucky was glad. He didn't know what to tell him. Howard had been a great man and he murdered him. And he killed his wife, even though she had nothing to do with it. Steve and Tony were barely talking to each other which had made the wait for news on Romanoff awkward. Steve was mad at Stark for what had happened to Romanoff and guilty for lying to him and Stark was mad at Steve for lying to him and felt guilty for what had happened to Romanoff.

Romanoff was brought to a private room after her surgery where he was currently sitting on a couch keeping an eye on her. Stark had left a letter for her because he had to return to the States after breaking out their friends. He said he was only helping Steve because he owed Romanoff.

He watched Romanoff's face. She was still very pale but she didn't look like she was on the brink of death anymore. Shuri said that she would be out for several hours until her body recovered from the shock and trauma that it went through. Getting impaled by a pipe was no joke. It still felt wrong that he was the one looking after her but he had to do it for Steve. He remembered shooting her in DC and he was sure that he shot her before that. He had read her file, he knew that she went through something similar like him. If she could get out of it on the other side, maybe there was still hope for him.

There was one thing he didn't understand though. Why did Steve kiss that blonde when he was clearly in love with Romanoff? He hadn't understand why that Wilson guy gave Steve a disappointed frown when he got back into the car. Was Romanoff his girlfriend and they watched him cheat on her? But would Steve really cheat on his girl? Or leave her behind in a hangar? Bucky didn't think so. So Wilson was probably disappointed that Steve kissed the blonde and not Romanoff. It was so obvious to Bucky that Romanoff was the woman his best friend loved. He had looked heartbroken in Leipzig when he thought that he had to fight her and he had been practically out of his mind during the flight to Wakanda.

He had to give Steve some tips about women before he went under because if he remembered correctly he had been quite the ladies man back in the day. Someone from T'challa's staff came in and informed him that Steve was on his way back to Wakanda. He looked over to the redhead and hoped Steve would be here when she'd wake up. Bucky was sure that Steve wouldn't forgive himself if he missed it. And something told Bucky that Romanoff wanted Steve to be here when she'd wake up.

* * *

Ten months later. Rome, Italy.

They were lucky and got two rooms at a decent motel outside Rome under false names. Steve would as always share the room with Sam so Natasha could have some privacy. She often complained that she could share the room with one of them and sometimes the three of them had to when they could only get one room but he and Sam were gentlemen and always made sure she got her own room or at least got to sleep in the bed and not on the floor. She called them sometimes sexists but he couldn't just bear the sight of Natasha curled into a little ball on the floor. And besides, he and Sam were soldiers, they were used to hard floors.

Sam announced that he would go back to the little cafe to see if he got a chance with the pretty waitress.

"Don't wait up." He winked. "And take me as an example and go over to Nat!" He said before he got of the door.

Steve sighed and rolled his eyes. Sam took his role as his wingman quite literally and tried to push him into Natasha's direction. What had Sam said after he and Natasha left Wakanda and met up with him in Cairo? _The girl of your dreams almost dies and you still don't tell her what you feel, dude? What will it take until you finally confess?_ He didn't like to think back to the day Natasha almost bled to death. Tony had found out the truth about his parents' death and then he almost killed Natasha by accident. Tony still felt terrible about it and Steve knew that he sent Natasha new gear from time to time. He and Tony hadn't talked since they got the others out of the Raft, he couldn't really blame Tony for that. He hadn't told him the truth and he could understand why he wanted to try to kill Bucky. Steve wanted to kill Tony after he accidentally impaled Natasha on a pipe. There was no doubt in his mind that he would have tried to kill Tony if Natasha had died. He was so incredibly grateful to T'challa and Shuri for saving Nat and helping Bucky. He could never repay them. They saved the two most important people in his life.

Should he really go over to Natasha's room? What was he supposed to say? _I love you, I've loved you for so long?_ Nope, that was not gonna happen. Things would get really awkward between them if he told her how he truly felt and the three of them made a good team. Traveling around the globe and helping people. They had to be careful so they wouldn't be made but Natasha was the best when it came to those things and they managed to stay under the radar.

He decided to go to her room and ask her if she wanted to play cards or watch a movie with him. It was rare that they had a quiet evening and he wanted to enjoy it with the woman he loved (that not she knew that she was the woman he loved).

He borrowed a bag of chips from Sam and knocked on Natasha's door three quick times and then after a pause he knocked again to let her know it was him. She opened the door a few moments later. He tried his best not to stare at her. Her brown hair (he missed the red) was still wet from the shower and she was wearing sweat pants and a wide tank top and he could see her lacy bralette thing underneath it. She really was testing him with her ability to look sexy and cute at the same time. But he was quite proud of the fact that Natasha hadn't figured out yet that he was in love with her. It had to be the greatest accomplishment of his life.

"What's up?"

"Sam left to pursue his chance at true love and I thought you maybe wanna watch a movie with me or something?"

She nodded and let him in. Natasha put her laptop between them on the bed and he let her pick a movie. She chose Singing in the Rain (he figured out a long time a go that musicals were her favorite genre) and they shared the chips he took from Sam.

"You know I still don't know how to dance." He admitted after the credits rolled.

"I thought you wanted to take classes?"

He had told her that after she didn't offer to teach him like he had hoped she would. "Well, SHIELD fell and then I had other stuff to deal with."

"Right." She shut her laptop. "You want me to teach you? I'm no Debbie Reynolds but I know a few moves."

His heart was pretty much pounding against his rib cage. "Sure, yeah. That'd be great."

She got off the bed and put on some slow music. "You can learn the tango another time. How about I show you how to sway to the music?"

He nodded and walked over to her. "Okay, put your hands on my waist." He did and she looped her arms around his neck. "Good, follow my movement."

He stepped on her feet more than once and he was so embarrassed even though she assured him that it was fine. He didn't know how long it took him but he was finally moving with Natasha in sync and she showed him how to waltz. They danced through the room and Natasha looked up at him with a little smile on her face. He wanted to kiss her so badly but he knew that she didn't want him to. She never showed any sign that she saw him more as a friend and he was okay with that. He just wanted to be around her and he wanted her to be safe.

The music got slower again and Natasha's arms went back around his neck and they swayed to the music. She rested her cheek on his chest and he was sure that she could hear his heart going crazy. They kept moving to the music and he couldn't remember a time where he felt more at peace. She was now looking up at him with open eyes and then she rose on her tiptoes and pulled his head down. Was she... She closed her eyes and pressed her lips against his. His brain stopped working for a second and then he kissed her back. It was so much better than the kiss on the escalator. Natasha's hands moved to grab the collar of his shirt and he pressed her closer against him. Not that he had a lot of experience but the kiss was perfect. She kissed him softly and with care and he realized that he wasn't the only one with feelings. The kiss grew more passionate and deeper and they landed on the bed with Natasha on top of him.

His hands somehow ended on her ass. "Sorry."

She pulled away from his lips and chuckled. "Don't be." She pecked his lips. "You can squeeze if you want to."

He did and she grinned at him. "Who would have thought that Captain America was an ass man."

"I'm not Captain America anymore." He mumbled against her full lips. "And you also have nice breasts." Oh God, did he really just say that?

She brushed hair away from his forehead. She had told him after they went into hiding to grow his hair out and to grow a beard. And he totally hadn't smiled like an idot when she told him that he looked good with a beard. "You noticed, huh? Have you been checking me out, Rogers?"

"Um, maybe?" He hoped his beard was covering his blush.

She kissed the corner of his mouth. "It's okay. I might sneak a peek at your ass from time to time."

"Yeah?" His hands were still on her ass but she didn't seem to mind.

"You certainly have a great behind. But it's not my favorite part of you. You wanna know what that is?"

He nodded unsure where this was going. Maybe she liked his eyes the best? He had been told even before the serum that he had pretty eyes.

"Your heart." She whispered and said heart almost stopped beating. "It's what makes you who you are."

"Natasha-" He wanted to tell her that he loved her but she already was kissing him and he felt how she poured everything into the kiss. She wasn't ready to hear it but he could wait to tell her. She rolled them so he was on top of her and slid her hands under his shirt. God, that felt nice.

"I've never done this." He admitted after Natasha gave him another kiss that was out of this world. Would she be disappointed by his lack of experience? That he had no clue how to make love to her?

"We can stop, Steve." She removed her hands from his back and cupped his face. "We don't have to have sex tonight. I can wait. Do you want to stop?"

"No." And then he kissed her and listened to Natasha and his body for the rest of the night.

* * *

Steve knew that Sam wasn't dumb and probably figured out that something happened between him and Natasha when he didn't come back to their room. Or maybe Sam spent the night with the waitress from the cafe.

Natasha gave him a kiss before they left her room to get breakfast. He was still on cloud nine. He couldn't believe that Natasha was finally his girl and he had made love to her. More than once, not that he was bragging or anything.

Sam was already sitting at a table in the dining room and they joined him. He looked tired, seemed like he had fun last night as well. "Look guys, I'm over the moon that you two got finally together after years of mutual pining but could you two please keep it down?"

"What?!" He asked in shock. Did Sam hear them?

"This motel has shockingly thin walls as I found out last night. Not that I'm not impressed with your stamina, Cap. Actually I'm kinda jealous but I didn't get any sleep last night! Like how did you not break Natasha?!"

Oh God, he wanted to die. He had no idea that they had been so loud last night. He looked at Natasha who grinned smugly. "You're just mad that you didn't get any last night, Sam!"

"That's totally besides the point, Romanoff! You two are buying me noise-cancelling headphones! And I'm never gonna share a room with you guys again! Who knows if you won't go at it when you think I'm asleep!" Sam looked actually horrified and Steve felt kind of bad for traumatizing him. But then again he was finally with Natasha and everything else didn't really seem to matter right now.


	37. Miracle

**_Thank you for your reviews, faves and follows!_**

 ** _This is for everyone who wanted a pregnancy/baby one shot. I hope it's convincing because I have zero clue when it comes to this topic:D_**

 _Natasha's stupid flu won't go away and she begrudgingly goes to Dr. Cho who has news for her that will change her and Steve's live forever._

* * *

Natasha had been sick for days. She was nauseous all the time, so very tired, her body hurt and she was in a bad mood. Steve, sweet Steve, made her soup and tea and took over her work at the facility and still made sure that he was a lot at home to look after her. She really didn't deserve such a great boyfriend especially when she snapped at him all the time and then started crying. Something was really wrong with her but she was too stubborn to get help. If she didn't love Steve so damn much, she wouldn't have accept his pampering as well.

She was again in the bathroom puking her soul out when Steve got home. He immediately came to her and rubbed her back. "Nat, you have to go to Helen. This is not normal. I don't think you got the flu."

She looked at him when she was done praying to the porcelain god. "No."

Steve sighed and flushed the toilette. "Please. For me. I really worry about you."

"Fine." She gritted through her teeth and cursed herself for loving Steve. Her love outweighed her stubbornness. "I'll go tomorrow."

Steve smiled. "Thank you, sweetheart." He kissed her forehead even though she probably smelled like puke since she hadn't brushed her teeth yet. "Do you want me to got with you?"

"God, no." She shook her head and Steve helped her get up and she walked to the sink to brush her teeth. "I think I'll manage that alone. Thanks, dad."

He rolled his eyes at her and kissed her hair. "You want some tea for your stomach?"

She nodded and he left the bathroom. After tea and some zwieback, they went to bed early and she fell asleep with Steve's arms wrapped around her.

The next morning she came with Steve to the facility and visited Helen to tell her about her symptoms.

"That doesn't sound like an abdominal influenza. I need to do some tests." She took her blood and she had to pee in a cup and waited for an hour in the common kitchen. She was hungry and looked in the fridge for food and found some leftovers. She opened the Tupperware and the smell of curry greeted her. She loved curry but the smell was now disgusting to her. What the fuck was wrong with her? Did HYDRA injected her with something to make her lose the will to live because she couldn't fucking eat anything?! She put the curry back into the fridge and slammed the door when FRIDAY informed her that Dr. Cho wanted to see her.

She took a deep breath and walked into Helen's office hoping she would soon know what was going on with her.

"Natasha, please have a seat." Helen gave her a professional smile and she couldn't read if Helen was about to tell her that she was going to die.

"Okay, what is it? Ebola?" She joked and Helen didn't laugh.

"I ran the tests thrice to make sure that we got it right because of your condition."

"Huh?" What was she talking about?

"Natasha, you're pregnant." Helen paused. "You are expecting a child. It explains everything, you show all the symptoms of the first trimester. I need to do an ultrasound to tell how far you are. Congratulations." She said carefully.

"What?"

"I know that must be surprising-"

"It's not surprising, it's impossible. My ovaries...and the Red Room serum destroys sperm before it..." She shook her head. "Do the tests again, I'm not pregnant!" No, she wasn't. Helen was wrong. Having a child was not something she could ever have.

"I did the test three times. Every time with the same result. You're pregnant."

"No!" How could Helen do something like that! Getting her hopes up only be crushed. A baby...Steve's baby...She shook her head again. "I'm not gonna be a mom."

"Would you please let me do an ultrasound?"

"Fine." But only to prove Helen that she was a fucking moron in her field. She laid down on the gurney, pulled her shirt up and pushed her jeans a bit down and Helen already put the cold gel on her stomach. She moved the ultrasound transducer around and then smiled. She turned the screen towards her and pointed against it. "There's your baby, Natasha." She stared at it with wide eyes. There truly was a little nub. Could she really be pregnant? Was she really carrying Steve's child? Helen flicked a switch on and the room was suddenly filled with the most beautiful sound she had ever heard. "And that's your baby's heartbeat." She couldn't hold her tears back anymore. She was pregnant, she was going to be a mom. And Steve was going to be a dad. "You're eight weeks along." Helen said and printed the first picture of her child out. "Do you want me to get Steve?"

"No, I'll tell him later." She traced the little nub on the picture. Her baby. Her little bean. "Can I stay here for a bit?"

Helen smiled and nodded. "Of course. Take all the time you need. I'll get you some prenatal vitamins and a list with book recommendations. I'll be right back."

Natasha didn't take her eyes off her baby and moved her hand to her stomach. "Hi, baby! Mommy already loves you so much. You're my little miracle. And your daddy...oh he's gonna love you so very much."

Helen came a few minutes later with prenatal vitamins (why did even have this at the facility?!) and a list with books and tips for her pregnancy. "How?" She only asked. How did she get this miracle?

"One theory is that Steve's sperm potentially healed your uterus and that it was too strong for your serum."

"Superhealing supersperm?" She snorted. Thank God Steve wasn't an arrogant man. But why did it take two years for her to get pregnant? They had a lot of sex, shouldn't she have gotten pregnant sooner? It didn't matter. Steve gave her the greatest gift and they would become a real family. She had to smile when she counted back and remembered the night their little bean was conceived. It was their second anniversary and it had been very romantic. She thanked Helen and drove back home after telling FRIDAY to inform Steve where she went.

She took her vitamins when she was home and immediately ordered every book from Helen's list. She signed up for a few mommy-to-be newsletters and spent the day reading blogs from pregnant women. Steve sent her a text telling her that he would be home soon. She quickly went to their bedroom to get an old jewelry box to put the ultrasound picture in it and wrapped it with pretty gift paper. She washed her face, put on some light make up and changed into a black wrap dress. Maybe she was crazy but she didn't want the waistband of her jeans to hurt the little bean. She was still nauseous and tired but now she knew why and she didn't care anymore. She would endure anything to have this baby.

She walked back down stairs and waited for Steve. The front door got unlocked five minutes later and she stopped herself from throwing herself into his arms. She was standing in the foyer and smiling at him.

"Nat, wow...You look amazing." He breathed out and threw his keys into the bowl on the dresser. "It went well with Helen? Are you feeling better?"

She ran towards him and kissed him until she was out of breath. Steve laughed a little. "What's going on? Not that I didn't like the greeting."

She took his hand and put the box in it. "Open it!"

"Okay?" He smiled and removed the gift paper. "What's going on? You seem so different. This morning you were so sick."

"Look inside."

He opened the box and gasped. "What?" He looked at her. "What? How? I thought...What?"

"It's a miracle. " She could tell him about his superhealing supersperm another time. "I'm pregnant." She took his hand and placed it on her stomach. "This is our little bean."

He had tears in his eyes when he kissed her and then lifted her up and twirled her around. "I love you." He bend down to kiss her stomach. "And I love our little bean. I love you both so much."

She went with Steve to Helen the next day so he could hear their little bean's heartbeat.

Her first trimester was hell but the second one was heaven. She felt good, had lots of energy and was pretty much horny all the time and she practically jumped Steve every time they were alone. He told her she was a goddess and honestly she felt like one. Then the third semester came along and she'd rather have the first one back. She couldn't move, everything hurt, she felt and looked like a whale and was almost always in a bad mood. She managed to almost make Tony cry two times.

But in the end it was all worth it. James Clinton Rogers was born on a Friday night and the most perfect thing she had ever seen. Everyone adored James and he was spoiled-rotten, just like his little sister who was born two years later. A baby and a toddler were exhausting but Steve and the kids were all she ever wanted and she was happier than she ever thought she would be.

* * *

 **FYI: The first chapter of my new multi-chapter story "Neighbor" is online:)**


	38. Girls night

_The women have a girls night at the Tower and want to know what's going on between Natasha and Steve._

* * *

Pepper changed from her business suit into a loose t-shirt and jeans shorts. She finally was done with work and had the whole evening free. SI bought up a competitor and the transition took all of Pepper's energy and time but now everything was done and she could take some time for herself. Tony wasn't in New York to monopolize her so she decided to invite her female friends over to have a girls night. She hadn't one of those since college and she was really looking forward to spend time with Natasha, Maria and Wanda. She was pretty sure that neither Natasha or Wanda ever went to a girls night and she wanted to make sure that their first one would be memorable. She ordered the best food and alcohol Manhattan had to over and had beauty specialists on stand by.

Tony sent her a text asking if they already started a pillow fight in their underwear and she lovingly rolled her eyes and told FRIDAY to stop the surveillance feed on this floor. Knowing him, he would definitely look at the footage in case there actually was pillow fight.

Maria arrived first since she was already at the Tower, followed by Wanda who took classes at NYU and would stay the night. Natasha came fashionable late as always when it wasn't job related and bought two bottle of stoli with her. Pepper was still surprised that Natasha actually agreed to this and showed up. Maybe she was here for Wanda so the girl wouldn't feel uncomfortable since she didn't know her or Maria very well.

They sat down on the soft pillows on the floor that Pepper extra bought for today and she didn't miss how Wanda took immediately the seat next to Natasha. She told them a bit about her college life and she was happy for the girl that after everything she had to go through in life, she found something that fulfilled her.

"Let's play Never have I ever!" Maria out of all people suggested causing Natasha to snort.

"What a sneaky way to ask us about our sex lives." She took a sip of her martini. "I for one do not need to know what Tony likes in bed."

Not that Pepper planned to reveal that but before she could say anything Wanda spoke up. "Um, we played that at a college party and I...well, there isn't really much that will make me take a shot."

"That's not a bad thing." Natasha rubbed Wanda's arm. "You'll get to make enough embarrassing experiences to play this game. Believe me, kiddo."

Maria nodded. "Yeah, one year of college and you'll ace this game. I know I did."

They ate, they drank, they laughed and Pepper didn't know why they hadn't done this before. The four of them really needed to do more together. It was nice to be surrounded by smart and beautiful women. They talked about SI and the Avengers Initiative and Maria admitted after a few drinks that she hooked up with Sam.

"What?" Wanda shrieked amused and sipped on her beer. She wasn't 21 yet but they agreed that with her staying at the Tower she could have some beers.

Maria shrugged her shoulders. "Happened after the whole SHIELD fiasco. We only hooked up a few times when he was in town. Dating is just not for me and then it ended."

"Did you know about this?" Pepper asked Natasha.

"Well, not officially but I didn't really care to be honest. Steve probably knows about it."

"What's the deal with you and Rogers anyway?" Maria raised an eyebrow and Pepper was actually curious herself. "You two are practically attached by the hip!"

Natasha's facial muscles didn't move at all. "We are leading the Avengers together."

"So you're telling me no long hours in his or your office ended with you two fucking on a desk?" Maria shot back and Wanda's cheeks turned pink.

"You seem to have put a lot of thought into that. You thinking from moving from Sam to Rogers?" Natasha smoothly replied.

"You didn't answer my question, Romanoff!"

Natasha laughed. "I think I did but it's not what you wanted to hear, _Hill."_

"I think you would make a cute couple." Wanda suddenly said and Pepper had to agree. Even Tony thought so and wanted to set them up but she stopped him every time. She didn't need Natasha to kill the man she loved.

"Thanks, Wanda. That's sweet." Natasha answered and Pepper was surprised that she didn't snark at Wanda. Natasha used to get angry when someone mentioned Steve to her in a romantic way. _Interesting._

 _"_ Is Steve currently seeing someone? Or are you?" Pepper asked innocently but Tony chose that moment to appear on the big flat screen on the wall behind them and asked if the pillow fight was about to start. He could be glad that he was on another continent because Pepper was positive that Maria and Natasha would have killed him for that comment if he was here.

Wanda braided their hair and the girl had really talent. She did braids that Pepper had never seen before. They watched a few episodes of Sex and the City with all three older women explaining to Wanda that dating in New York wasn't like that. They called it a night after midnight and Pepper went mentally through her calendar to figure out when they could do it again. She really had fun tonight.

* * *

Natasha walked up the stairs to her apartment, unlocked the door, got out of her clothes and boots and walked only in her underwear to her bedroom. The door was a bit open and the light was on. Did he wait for her return?

She opened the bedroom door wider and Steve greeted her with a bright smile on his face. He was sitting on her bed only in pajamas pants with a book on his lap. "Hi, doll. How was it with the girls?"

She unclasped bra and smirked when his gaze dropped to her breasts. She shimmed out of her panties and changed into his pajamas shirt that he left on the end of the bed for her. "Good. It was fun. You were right."

She took the book out of his lap and straddled his hips. His hands moved immediately to her waist and he kissed her. "Hi."

"Hi." She whispered back and captured his lips again. "So Hill wanted to know if you and I ever fucked on a desk in our offices."

Steve's eyes widened."What? How does she know?"

She laughed a little. "Relax, I didn't tell her that her guess was right. But I think we should tell them. Not that we have sex in our offices but that we are a couple."

He beamed and she felt like an ass for asking him to keep their relationship quiet for six months. "Really?"

"Really." She nodded. "Wanda thinks we would make a cute couple."

"Well, you are pretty cute." She rolled her eyes at his cheesiness but kissed him again.

His hands moved under her pajamas shirt to grab her bare ass. "So was that little striptease earlier meant to lead to more..."

"I'm already in my sleep wear." She pouted playfully.

Two seconds later Steve's hands started to unbutton her shirt and slid it off her shoulders. "What sleep wear?"

"You're terrible." She laughed when he started to nibble on her neck.

"You love me like this." He mumbled against her skin and then sucked on her pulse point.

"Yeah, I do. I really do."


	39. Come fly with me (AU)

_**For SilverInk. IvoryQuilt**_

 _AU: Natasha flies every weekend from DC to New due to work and a handsome flight attendant catches her eye._

* * *

Natasha clutched her weekend bag to her chest while she ran through the gate to get to her plane. A meeting at SI had taken longer than she planned and now she had to be fast or the plane would leave without her. She got promoted to lead the SI firm in DC but she loved New York too much to move completely to Washington and still spent every weekend in Manhattan. Her friend and boss Pepper offered her to use one of the private jets for her travels but Natasha's wasn't comfortable with so much luxury but she didn't say no when SI offered to pay for first class.

She was the last one to board the plan and they closed the door behind her. She looked for her seat and sat down getting out some papers she wanted to work on during the flight so she could enjoy her weekend. She glanced around but she didn't see him yet. Maybe he was on another flight or had the day off. She hoped she would figure out soon if he was on the flight because there was no way she would put on a sheet mask if he could see her with it.

Someone tipped on her shoulder and she looked up. No sheet mask for her today. Steve as she knew from his name tag was working today. He smiled at her. "Your usual?"

"Yes, thank you." She smiled back and tried without attracting attention to her to check out his ass when he walked away to make her a martini. Really, he could work as a model with that body and beautiful face. It wasn't very original but he was fucking hot and seemed really nice. It could just have been the guidelines of the airline but Steve was kind to everyone and even managed to calm down crying babies when the parents were on the brink of a nervous breakdown. Not that Natasha was a baby person but seeing him holding a baby in his muscular arms was quite a sight to be seen.

"Your drink, ma'am." Steve handed her the martini and his fingers slightly brushed her own. She was glad that she was wearing a blazer and he couldn't see her goosebumps.

"Thank you, Steve." She smiled at him. He even remembered to put extra olives in her drink.

"Miss Romanoff." He nodded and left to deal with another passenger. Uh, she liked how her name sounded from his lips. She wanted him to moan her first name. Thank God that no one knew that she was lusting after a stranger. She shook her head slightly and put her attention back on her work.

She had a great weekend in New York and tried not to be too disappointed that Steve wasn't on her flight back to DC.

* * *

She hadn't see Steve in the next month and was really tempted to just ask the airline where the fuck he was. Did he quit? Had he been put on another flight schedule? Could she maybe get his personal contact info? Yeah, she didn't think she would get that.

She was already at the airport when a storm surprisingly hit DC and all flights were cancelled. It was so windy outside that she couldn't even take a cab back to her place in Georgetown. Everyone was advised to stay inside. Ten people had already died. She was surprised that there weren't too many people at the airport for a Friday.

She dragged her trolley to a sportsbar and ordered a martini and a cheeseburger. Some game was on but she didn't pay attention to it and got her tablet out to get some work done. She was halfway through her burger and drink when someone sat down next to her at the counter. She was in no mood to get hit on. She looked up to tell the guy to get lost but she stopped herself when she saw that Steve was sitting next to her.

"Hey." He smiled at her and ordered a whiskey.

"Hi." She smiled back and took a closer look at him. He was in jeans, a Henley shirt and a leather jacket and long story short he looked fucking hot. "Not working today?"

"No. I was on my way back home. But then the storm happened."

"And is home...?"

"Brooklyn, ma'am. Born and raised." Brooklyn? That was only a stone's throw away from Manhattan.

"I hope it's okay that I'm sitting here, Miss Romanoff. I just saw you sitting there and thought I say hi."

"It's more than okay and please call me Natasha."

"Natasha." He repeated with a smile on his face. "My last name is Rogers by the way."

Steve Rogers, what a nice name. They talked about their work and she learned that he was working as a flight attendant until he would find a job as an illustrator. He had served and then started at the airline to make money and to see the world. He did a quick doodle on her napkin and he seemed really talented. They had a few more drinks and talked about everything and anything. He was not only incredibly handsome but also sweet and funny. How could a guy like that be single?

"Can I show you something?" He suddenly asked after insisting to pay for her drinks.

"Sure. It's not like I have plans right now." She smirked and hopped off the bar stool.

Steve laughed. "You really know what to say to a guy, don't you."

She winked at him and let him take her trolley. She followed him pretty much through the whole airport and they passed annoyed passengers who wanted to know when they could finally leave.

He stopped in front of a door and got a key out. "You don't have to stay here if it makes you uncomfortable, Natasha. I get it if you don't want to be alone with me since we don't really know each other." He unlocked the door and opened it. "But here are no angry and loud people."

He stepped aside and she looked into some unused lounge with its furniture being covered with blankets. She walked past by him into the room. Who would turn down to be alone with a guy that nice and handsome? And if he tried something she didn't want she would put him in his place.

"What are you waiting for?" She smiled over her shoulder and removed one of the blankets and sat down on the couch. Steve smiled and closed the door behind him. She got out off her high heels and Steve sat down next to her. For some reason Steve had cards on him and they played Black Jack. She claimed that she could read cards and told him about his future.

"Do you even know what you're doing?" Steve asked with an arched eyebrow.

"Nope." She grinned back and continued to turn over cards.

"So I'm not gonna be the next President with the nickname Captain America?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "Well, nothing is entirely impossible."

"And what about the beautiful woman in my future with the _nice ass_ as you put it?" He asked amused.

She collected the cards and put them back into their box. "That depends entirely on you."

"Yeah?" He leaned a bit closer. "What about the beautiful woman with the nice ass right in front of me?"

"You've been looking at my ass, Rogers?"

"Seems only fair with you always checking out mine, Romanoff." Fuck, she really thought he hadn't noticed!

Steve chuckled lightly and then leaned closer and pressed his lips softly on hers. She cupped his face and kissed him back. His hands moved to her waist to pull her closer to him and they kissed until they were both out of breath. He really knew how to kiss a girl and she captured his lips again after getting air into her lungs. Steve was more than willing and kissed her eagerly back.

"I wanted to do that for a long time." He whispered against her lips.

"Me, too." She admitted and kissed him again.

They slept together that night in the most innocent way with her snuggled against his chest. They could fly to New York the next morning and Steve picked her up on the same day for their first date. She fell in love with him right there on the steps of her apartment building when she saw his Harley.

He found a job as an illustrator six months later and after another six months they moved into a beautiful brownstone house in Brooklyn with a baby on the way.


	40. Do not disturb

_**This chapter contains sexual content. Nothing really graphic though.**_

 _Three times Natasha and Steve almost get caught and one time they did but didn't care._

* * *

Steve hadn't seen his girlfriend in weeks. Fury had sent him and Sam to the Ukraine to take out a human trafficking ring while Natasha had been in Paris to find out who were the backers. He missed his girl. Not that anyone knew that Natasha was his girl because she had asked him not to tell anyone that they were dating. And since he would do anything for her, he had agreed to it.

Fury ordered them to fly to Paris so they could take out the leaders of the ring who lived a good life built on the pain of others. For some reason Tony was also in Paris and sitting next to Natasha in the surveillance van observing the night club where the young girls were forced to sell their bodies. Steve's smile dropped when Tony snatched the plastic bag with take out out of his hand and inspected it. He had been hoping to be alone with his girl.

"Ugh, spring rolls?" Tony growled annoyed and stood up from his seat. "Alrighty then. I'm off. See ya!"

Tony left the van while Steve got into it and closed the door. "What is he-?"

He couldn't finish his sentence because Natasha grabbed the collar of his leather jacket and pushed him into the seat, straddled his waist and kissed him like her life depended on it. He wrapped his arms around her small frame and pressed her closer to him. God, he had missed her so fucking much! Had he worn that particular leather jacket because Natasha had ordered it for him and literally jumped him in his living room when he tried it on? Absolutely. Natasha was grinding her hips against him and kissing him with teeth and tongue while he bucked up his hips into her to get some friction. He had been without her for weeks and he was aching for her.

"Where can we go?" He moaned into her mouth while she moved her hips faster. "Do you have a safe house here?"

"We can't leave. We have to stay here, babe. Catch the bad guys." She stopped her movement and he groaned in frustration. He was so turned on and needed to have her. Like right now.

She pecked his lips before she got off his lap and sat down next to him and got a spring roll out of the take out carton. She shoved it into her mouth in a way that made him think about something completely different she did with her mouth that he liked a lot.

"Natasha!" He growled and got out of his leather jacket to hide how aroused he was.

"You're so cute when you're hot and bothered!" Natasha smirked and kept eating. The van door got suddenly yanked open and Tony was outside. "Haha, I knew- Wait a minute, why are you two not playing hide the zucchini right now?!"

"Did you hit your head?" Natasha asked with a raised eyebrow and got up to shut the van door.

"That was close." Steve said and grabbed a carton to fill his stomach with food.

They got the bad guys four hours later and he let Natasha beat the shit out of them because he knew that this mission reminded her of what had happened to her. As it turned out Natasha did have a safe house in Paris and they didn't even make it to her bedroom until round three.

* * *

A cold front had hit New York and it was extremely cold for October. Not that Steve was complaining. The serum kept him warm and despite being Russian Natasha felt cold all the time and pretty much clung to him when they were alone. Natasha was basically wrapped around him 24/7 since the cold front was here. He was already looking forward to Winter. He loved clingy Natasha. He knew that he was the only one who got to see that side of her.

She spent the night at his place in Brooklyn and pretty much used him as her blanket to keep her warm. He was afraid that he would crush her with his weight but she seemed to like it and wrapped her arms around his shoulders to press him closer to her.

He woke up early the next morning and they were both on their sides facing each other with his arm wrapped around her and their legs entangled. He kissed her face to wake her up. She made a tiny growl that was more adorable than scary and kept her eyes closed. He smiled to himself and kissed her lips. Her eyes were still closed but she kissed him back lazily.

"Morning, sweetheart."

Another inaudible tiny growl was made and his heart fluttered. He sometimes had a hard time believing that Natasha was a ruthless assassin. She was so cute when she was alone with him that it made his teeth hurt.

He kissed her again and pushed his tongue inside her mouth this time. She pressed herself closer to him and ran her hand through his hair. He pulled away after some time so she could get air into her lungs.

Her eyes were still closed but she had a small smile on her face. "Pancakes."

"You want me to make you oatmeal?"

She wrinkled her nose. Really, he had seen her slaughter her way through an ISIS cell, how could she be so fucking cute? "Pancakes."

"Oatmeal with lots of raisins?"

He knew she hated raisins. "Pancakes."

"And a big healthy green juice? Coming right up, doll."

She opened her beautiful green eyes and pouted. "Pancakes."

He wanted to tease her some more but someone rang his doorbell. Who could that be at seven am? He kissed her nose and got up to get rid of whoever that was. He walked through his apartment, opened his door and was greeted by Sam's face.

"Dude, why are you not dressed yet?" Sam pointed at his bare chest. He only wore pajamas pants because Natasha stole the matching shirt. And again she looked so cute in that shirt with the fuzzy socks Lila made for her.

"What?"

"Our morning run?"

"I cancelled."

"No, you didn't."

"Yes, I did. I texted you last night." Oh no, did he forget to hit send? To his defense Natasha was nibbling on his neck and shoving one hand into his pants so he had been a bit distracted.

"I didn't get that text. Why did you cancel?" Sam cocked his head with a curious look.

"I have an appointment in an hour. I have to get ready for that." He lied quickly hoping that he was convincing.

"Oh, okay. Well, then I go alone. See you, man." Sam nodded and left.

Natasha could be proud of him. He was getting better at lying. He walked back to the bedroom where Natasha was wrapped into the blankets like a burrito. He wanted to get to her and pulled at the blankets but they didn't move an inch. Jesus, how strong was this tiny woman?

"Pancakes." Her voice came from the inside the blanket burrito.

"Fine." He groaned. He'd rather gone back to bed to cuddle with her.

Her head poked out of the blankets. "Thanks, babe. Love you." And then her head was gone again.

"Yeah, yeah." He left the bedroom to make her breakfast. What was the correct term? Right, he was whipped.

* * *

Steve had been talking to countless American and Japanese politicians to do damage control after Tony reenacted Godzilla with the Hulk in Tokyo. No one got hurt and Steve was still wondering how Tony even got Bruce to do this. He didn't know with how many people he talked today but it was already evening and he wanted to get out of his office and drive home. Or better yet, he'd drop by Natasha's place. She would lift his mood in no time. God, how he loved that woman.

He was pretty sure he was the last one at HQ and shut down his computer. Maybe he should stop by the supermarket on his way to get his girl the ice cream she loved so much. His office door got opened and he was already internally groaning thinking that Tony had created another mess for him to fix. But it was Natasha who walked through the door and closed it behind her.

"Hey, soldier." She smiled and walked over to him. "Everything back to normal?"

"Yeah." He answered and Natasha sat down on his lap. He dropped his head on top of her breasts making her chuckle. "Sometimes I wanna shoot Tony to the moon."

"You're not the only one." Her hands moved to the back of his neck and massaged the tense muscles there. "We should get in contact with NASA about your idea." He smiled into her cleavage and pressed his lips on the exposed skin there. She lifted his head and looked down at him with mischief twinkling in her eyes. "Need me to lift your spirits, Captain?"

"Yeah. You wanna go to-" He wanted to take her out to dinner but he didn't get to finish his sentence because she was suddenly sinking to her knees and her hands moved to his belt.

"Nat!" His eyes widened when he realized what she was about to do.

"Yes or no?" Her hands were still on his belt but not moving.

They were the only ones still here and what sane man turned down a blow job. "Yes."

She smirked up at him and then unbuckled his belt. She was doing the most wonderful things with her mouth to him and he tried his best to muffle his moans in case the cleaning stuff was already here. He didn't need them to know that Captain America was getting head from Black Widow in his office.

Two things happened at the same time. The door got opened and Natasha stopped moving her head but he was still in her mouth. He looked at the door and Fury was at the door. Out of all people it had to be Fury! He prayed that his wooden desk was covering Nat from Fury's eyes. Steve had to admit that he was kinda glad that no one knew that he and Natasha were together because he was scared how Fury would react. He kinda feared that Fury would make him disappear if he'd ever find out that Steve was sleeping with his favorite.

"Still here, Rogers?"

"Uh-uh." He managed to gulp out. Natasha seemed highly amused and moved her tongue and it took all his willpower not to moan. "Everything's fixed."

"Good. Make sure to keep Stark in check. Good night, Rogers."

"Night, Fury."

As soon as Fury was gone Natasha began to bob her head but he gently grabbed her ponytail to stop her. She let go of him and looked up sweetly. "Already enough?"

"What if Fury would have figured out what was happening in here?"

"You getting head?"

"Natasha, I'm serious!"

"But he didn't figure it out. And even if he did, he wouldn't have said anything. It would have been more uncomfortable for him than for us. You want me to keep going?"

He told FRIDAY to lock the door. "Yes, please." Natasha winked at him and took him into her mouth again.

* * *

Aliens invaded London and the whole team flew to England to stop them. Thor said that these people were a particular vicious kind and they truly were brutal and ruthless. Steve was sweating and tired but he had to make sure that the enemy didn't leave the area they circled them in. He had a deep cut on his stomach and he already knew that Natasha would have something to say about that. He threw his shield decapitating an alien that tried to get a jump on Thor. He saw Sam, Wanda, Bucky, Rhodey and Tony all fighting but he didn't see Natasha.

"Does anyone have eyes on Nat?"

"Last time I saw her, she was running down to the Thames getting a child out of harm's way." Bucky replied.

He tried not to panic. Natasha was the best, the Black Widow was a legend. She was okay, she had to be. He focused on fighting off the aliens and they managed to kill the majority and the rest fled.

Natasha was still MIA and he was starting to get worried. Really worried because she didn't reply through the comms. Sam sent Red Wing to search for her. His stomach was twisted in knots and he felt sick. What if she was somewhere hurt and they couldn't find her? What if she needed him and he wasn't there?

"Hey, guys."

He spun around and Natasha was limping towards them with an alien head in her hand that she dropped to the floor. "Found their leader. Played a little heads will roll."

"That's why the rest of them fled." Thor said. "Well done, Natasha."

Steve didn't care about any of that and ran to Natasha and wrapped his arms around her lifting her off the ground. "I was so fucking scared, Nat."

"Sorry." She whispered and kissed him in front of the whole team. "I'll make it up to you later." She winked and captured his lips in a passionate kiss.

"I fucking knew it!" Tony screamed behind them but Steve didn't care. Natasha was safe and in his arms. The rest didn't really matter right now.


	41. The kids are alright (AU) (RATED M)

**_This was originally inspired by a prompt from LoneWollOneill and a guest review and then the whole thing developed its own life._**

 ** _This one shot contains sexual content and is RATED M!_**

 _As a single mom meeting men isn't really easy until Natasha meets her co-worker Steve._

* * *

Natasha just finished going through her last file of the day and was ready to call it a night. She packed her briefcase and checked her watch. It was five pm and maybe today she would manage to cook for her and Wanda and not have to order something. She always felt bad when she couldn't offer her daughter a home-cooked meal. She just left her office when her boss Tony Stark was coming her way with a handsome and tall man by his side. Wow, he was really good looking in that suit with his broad shoulders and muscular arms. She wasn't usually into facial hair and longer hair but that man really looked good with it. Wow, was she really drooling after some stranger?

"Natasha!" Tony greeted her. "Good that we run into you. I want you to meet someone. This is Steve Rogers. The new head of our security. Steve, this is Natasha Romanoff, head of PR."

Rogers offered her his hand. "Nice to meet you, ma'am."

His hand was soft and rough at the same time. "Hi." She didn't miss the smirk Tony was giving her and she knew that he wanted to introduce them with a plan in his mind. Listen, she loved the man and Pepper. They had done so much for her. Made it possible for her to have a career at SI and spent enough time with her daughter and she knew how lucky she was to have a boss who didn't roll his eyes when she had to miss work because her little one had a fever. And it helped of course that Wanda had Tony wrapped around her little finger. It had taken her days to talk Tony out of buying Wanda a pony and then that bastard bought her one of those mini Mercedes for children and now Wanda was cruising around it in their apartment.

"I just wanted you guys to meet each other before Steve starts here next week. We've actually been friends for a very long time." Was Tony trying to butter Steve up to her? "It's important for me to be surrounded by people that I trust. Natasha works for our company for five years now."

She did. Pepper had hired her when she was five months pregnant and needed a job to support her baby. She was all alone in New York and had no one until Tony and Pepper. "That's right." She gave Rogers a brief smile. "It was nice to meet you. Now if you'll excuse me I have to pick up my kid."

"You have a child?" Rogers asked surprised. She knew that look. Most men lost immediately their interest in her when they heard that she was a mother. "How old is your kid?"

"She's four."

Rogers was smiling. "My godson is six now. They are so cute at that age."

She was a bit surprised by that reaction. "Yes, they are. But I gotta go or I'll have a grumpy toddler and not a cute one. Have a nice evening." She nodded at Rogers and Tony who told her to give Wanda a kiss from her favorite uncle.

She was already around the corner when she heard Tony. "And? What do you say about her?"

"Oh God, stop it!"

She shook her head and got to Wanda's daycare to pick her up. Natasha's heart melted when Wanda ran towards her and flung her little arms around her neck when she kneeled down to greet her daughter. Wanda was her everything. She loved her more than anything in this world and she could confirm that a mother's love was unconditional.

"Hi, Mommy." Wanda breathed into her neck. "How was your day?"

"Good and yours?"

"Great. I drew a dragon!" She held the picture up.

"That's very pretty, Wanda! You wanna hang that on our fridge?"

She nodded with a beam on her face and she took her hand and walked with her home where she made chicken and vegetables for them and lifted Wanda up so she could put her drawing on the fridge. She bathed her daughter after dinner and tucked her into bed.

She was looking for a book to read to her when Wanda spoke up. "Claire is getting married. We met her husband today. Luke. He's strong and really tall. Why are you not married, Mommy?"

That caught her off guard. "Um, because I have no boyfriend? And I have you, my sun and stars." She kissed her daughter's forehead. "We don't need a man."

"Aren't you lonely?" Wanda asked with big eyes. "Mister Luke gives Miss Claire kisses and she smiles."

"You give me kisses. And I give you kisses." She kissed Wanda's face over and over again and she giggled.

* * *

She had to work on a new campaign for SI and stayed the night at her office. Thankfully her neighbor Clint and his wife agreed to look after Wanda and let her sleep at their place. The Bartons had a daughter who was Wanda's age and the two got a long pretty well.

The office door opened and she looked up. Rogers was looking back at her."Hi. I saw that the light was on and wanted to see if everything was okay. You're usually not here this late."

"Yeah, I have to finish the press launch for the new product." She explained and waved an arm at the mess in front of her. Her desk was covered in papers and SI merchandise. "What are you doing here? I thought you didn't have to do night shifts since you're the boss."

"Well, usually not. But Lang's kid is sick and I took his shift."

"That's...nice of you. Not every boss would do that."

Rogers shrugged his shoulders. "I'm just trying to do what's right." She smiled at that. Rogers seemed like a good guy. He looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "Have you eaten anything?"

Her stomach chose to growl in that moment and she blushed. "Um, no."

He laughed a little. "One sec, I'll be right back." He left her office and came five minutes later with a Tupperware container and a fork back. "Here."

She opened it and was greeted with the delicious smell of a lasagna. "Thank you but I don't wanna steal your food. Did your girlfriend made that for you?"

"I don't have a girlfriend." He said with a blush on his cheeks. He looked really cute like that. "No, my best friend made it. He and his husband have a restaurant. They're the parents of my godson. And I already ate. You can have that."

"Thank you, Mr. Rogers. That's very sweet."

His blush got redder. "You're welcome. And call me Steve."

"Only if you call me Natasha."

He smiled and she had to admit that he looked beautiful like that. "I'll let you get back to work, Natasha." He gave her another beautiful smile before he left her office.

She had the next day off but she needed to come in to sign a few papers and brought Wanda with her to SI. Her kid was disappointed that Tony wasn't here today because he always gave her money to buy candy. She had explained to Tony more than once that one hundred bucks was too much money for a four year old but he always shrugged and told her to put the rest to her college fund. God, her little one would be going to college one day! Wanda had been waiting for her in the entrance hall were Stan the 90 year old security guard would be playing with her until Natasha was done. When she came back Wanda wasn't playing with Stan but standing in front of Steve. God, he looked like a giant compared to Wanda. He kneeled down to be closer to Wanda's eye level. She liked it when people did that so they weren't talking down to her child.

She came closer to them. "Do you like dragons, Steve?"

"I haven't really thought about it but they're cool."

Wanda beamed at that. She was currently obsessed with dragons. "Uncle Tony says he'll build me a robot dragon!" What? She definitely had to talk with him about that. "But he told me not to say anything to Mommy."

"And your Mommy is who exactly? Shouldn't we look for her? You don't want to worry her, do you?"

"Mommy's right back. We're going to the park when she's back." Wanda moved her head a bit and saw her. "Mommy! Look who I met!"

"Oh, hi Natasha! I didn't know she was your kid." Steve stood up and smiled at her. "Got a really cute one." Wanda grinned a toothy smile.

"Yeah, I guess she's alright." She joked and brushed her hand through Wanda's hair. "Ready to go to the park, sweetie?"

Wanda nodded and she took her hand. "Say bye to Steve."

"Bye, Steve!" She waved her hand at him and he did the same.

"Bye, Wanda. And Natasha."

She smiled briefly and walked with her child out of the building. "Steve's really tall." Wanda commented and was suddenly sucking on a lollipop that Stan most definitely gave to her. "And his beard looks cool. Does he have a girlfriend?"

Natasha laughed. "He's a bit too old for you."

Wanda wrinkled her cute nose in disgust. "Not for me, Mommy! Boys are gross. Do you think he's cute?"

"I guess so."

Wanda's eyes lit up and Natasha didn't like that for some reason. "He likes dragons." She simply said like it was the only thing that counted and shoved the lollipop into her mouth.

* * *

It was the weekend and Steve decided to tag along when Bucky and Sam asked him to come with them and their kid Pietro to go to the open day of the Sesame Street. Sam and Bucky were his best friends and Pietro was his godson and so of course he said yes.

Pietro was very excited to meet his favorite characters and Sam and Bucky had to remind him more than once not to just storm off when they arrived. They got a tour of the set and Pietro was over the moon when he met Big Bird and Steve was sure that his parents took at least fifty pictures of the meeting.

"Steve?" A small voice asked behind him and he turned around to find Natasha's daughter Wanda behind him.

"Hi, Wanda." He looked around but couldn't see Natasha. "What are you doing here?"

"Mommy surprised me!" She beamed and looked around his legs at Big Bird.

"Does your mom know you went to see Big Bird?" He didn't think Natasha would let Wanda be on her own in this big crowd.

Sam was suddenly standing next to him. "Who's your friend?" He kneeled down. "Hi little lady. Where are you parents?"

"My mommy's somewhere there." Wanda pointed behind her. "Are you Steve's friend?"

"Yes, I am."

Wanda nodded seriously and it looked adorable. "Is Steve single?"

Bucky chose that moment to appear next to his husband and laughed. "Yes, he is, sweetheart. You know someone for him?"

"Yes, my mo-" Wanda didn't come further because Natasha was yelling her name and running towards her.

"There you are!" She picked Wanda up and pressed her against her body. He'd only seen Natasha in business outfits and she looked great in them but he had to admit that she looked amazing in sweater, jeans and sneakers. She was just so beautiful. "I was so worried! I told you not to wander around!"

"Sorry, Mommy." Wanda mumbled against Natasha's chest. She looked up from her kid and only seemed now to realize that he was here. "Um, Steve. Hi."

"Hey." He replied dumbly because Steve Rogers always turned into a complete moron when he talked to a gorgeous woman and Natasha had to be the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen.

"Well, hello." Bucky said smoothly and offered Natasha his hand. "I'm Bucky and that's my husband Sam. We're Steve's best friends. How do you two know each other?"

"I'm Natasha." She shook Bucky's offered hand. "We both work at SI."

"Is Bucky your real name?" Wanda asked with big eyes.

Bucky smiled. "It's a nickname. My middle name is Buchanan. Are you alone here? You two can tag along. I'm sure Pietro won't mind." Pietro was hiding behind Sam and gave them a shy smile. Natasha let Wanda down and she immediately asked Pietro if he liked dragons and then they were pretty much friends.

Natasha laughed at the sight. "Well, I guess now I have to tag along or Wanda will be mad."

He was really thankful to the kids that they bonded and that it made Natasha stay with them. He liked her, he liked her a lot. Everyone at SI was smitten with her and said nice things about her and he enjoyed the little talks they had when they ran into each other in the hallways. She was so beautiful with her red hair and green eyes and her kid was adorable. Tony had been raving about Natasha before he introduced them and had mentioned more than once that Natasha was single which he couldn't understand. How could she have no husband who adored her and her daughter? Tony mentioned that it always had been only Natasha and Wanda and he wanted to have a word with the man who left these two beautiful girls behind.

Wanda and Pietro got along so well that Bucky and Sam invited Natasha and her daughter to their restaurant for lunch after they were done at the Sesame Street and after Wanda begged her mom Natasha agreed to it. Sam quickly made a wonderful dish that the kids also liked and Steve was pretty convinced that Bucky hit on Natasha for him. Natasha seemed confused since his husband was sitting right next to him but Sam didn't mind because he himself had said more than once that Steve needed a girlfriend.

Sam and Natasha exchanged numbers so they could plan a play date for Wanda and Pietro. Great, now Sam and Bucky had her number and he didn't. Natasha and Wanda left after lunch and his heart fluttered a little when he told Natasha that it had been nice to run into them and she gave him a beautiful smile in return.

"You know, I have her number now." Bucky teased. "I can give it to you."

"I don't know what you mean."

Bucky snorted. "I have two eyes, you know. I could see how you look at her. Can't blame you. She's truly a vision."

"I thought you were gay?!"

"That doesn't mean I'm blind, punk! You want her number? Yes or yes?"

"Shut up!"

* * *

Natasha was finally done with her work and ready to leave. Wanda would stay the weekend with Tony and Pepper at their house in the Hamptons and Natasha could finally have some time for herself. She loved her little nugget but sometimes she needed a little break from being a mom. Her co-worker Maria invited her to go clubbing with her and her friends tomorrow and she was already looking forward to it. She couldn't even remember the last time she had set a foot into a club. It was definitely before Wanda. She pressed the elevator button and waited. Should she go shopping tomorrow morning? She didn't know if her leather pants and lace top were right for a night out. The elevator doors opened and Steve was in it. He looked good in his grey suit. Well, he always looked good. For the first time in years she was really interested in someone and she remembered how Tony not so subtle suggested to her that she should use her kid-free weekend to get to know Steve better if she knew what he meant. She had just rolled her eyes and pushed Wanda's little suitcase into his hands.

"Hey, Natasha." He greeted her with a smile that would make lesser women weak in the knees. "How are you? How's Wanda?" She liked it a lot that he always asked about her daughter when they saw each other.

"Good. We're both good. She spends the weekend with Tony and Pepper."

"You trust Tony with your kid?" He laughed.

She grinned back. "No, but I trust Pepper."

He chuckled lightly and that noise went straight to her core. Jesus, pull it together! She pressed the button for the first floor and leaned against the elevator wall. Steve kept a respectful distance which she appreciated. He just seemed like a decent guy and those were rare but she was pretty sure that he was not interested in a woman with a kid. One of her dates had called Wanda baggage and she threw her martini into his face before she left the restaurant.

Steve pulled a folded piece of paper out of his blazer and handed it to her. "Here. For Wanda."

She gave him a puzzled look and unfolded the picture. It was a drawning of Wanda riding a dragon. It looked beautiful. "Did you make this?"

He rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah."

"Wow, this is amazing. Wanda will definitely love it. Thank you for making this for her!" She smiled at him and he gave her one in return. The elevator suddenly made a jump causing Steve to fall on her pressing her against the elevator wall and then the elevator stopped. They were stuck and she was stuck between Steve and the wall. And he smelled really good. And his body felt really nice pressed against her. Steve looked horrified and was about to push himself away from her but she wouldn't have that. She grabbed his collar and kissed him. He made a surprised sound and she thought that she just made a horrible mistake and would be hearing from HR very soon but then he kissed her back and pressed her against the wall. God, felt it good to be finally touched by a man again. The kiss deepened and soon her tongue was exploring his mouth and he lifted her off the ground and she wrapped her legs around her waist. She shrugged his blazer off and he pressed wet kisses on her neck.

"Natasha." He moaned against her skin when her hands moved to his belt. "Are you sure?"

"Yes." She gasped out when he sucked on her pulse point. One hand slipped into his pants and holy shit it looked like she hit the jackpot. Steve was really well endowed. Steve groaned when she started to stroke him as best as she could in this angle and he pushed her skirt higher and played with her stockings.

"Fuck, do you wear this everyday?" He pressed his thigh against her core and she began to grind herself on him.

"I don't like tights." She moaned out because one hand moved between her legs. "Fuck, that's amazing." He circled her clit over her panties and she almost came right there. But she wanted more. "Steve, please."

He nodded and let her down so she could get rid of her panties and he could unbuckle his pants and pull them down. They didn't get very far though because suddenly the elevators door opened and they were greeted with Stan's shocked and amused face.

"And here I thought you two needed help. Ah, to be young again." He laughed. "I'll take the next elevator." The doors closed and the elevator started moving. She pulled her panties back up and picked up her purse and the drawing for Wanda from the floor. Had she really been about to have sex with a co-worker in an elevator? At her fucking workplace?

Steve was back in his blazer when she looked at him. "Um, I guess we got kinda carried away."

"Yeah..." She agreed and prayed that the floor would swallow her. She didn't even go on dates anymore but she jumped Steve? What was wrong with her?

"Listen." He rubbed the back of his neck and she saw that he was still hard. She looked quickly up before she jumped him again. "Do you wanna get dinner somewhere? I know this nice Chinese restaurant...We could go there now. If you have time of course."

Felt he obligated to ask her out because they almost had sex? "Steve, you don't have to do this."

"Huh?"

"You don't have to ask me on a date just because we almost hooked up." She said while brushing her hands through her hair so it wouldn't look too much like sex hair.

"That's not...I'm asking you out because I actually wanted to do that for some time now. Pretty much since I first saw you." He was blushing now and it was kind of adorable considering that she had her hand wrapped around his cock a few moments ago.

"I have a child."

"I know that."

"That doesn't bother you?"

He stared at her confused. "Why would it?"

"You truly are one of kind, aren't you?" She smirked at him.

"Does that mean yes?"

"Yes, that means yes." She answered and he smiled brightly. "Would it be okay if we just have take out today? At my place?"

"Huh?" Steve asked but then his face looked like he knew what she was implying. "Are you sure? I wasn't asking you out just to have sex with you."

"I know that." Somehow she knew he wasn't that kind of guy. "But I'm still inviting you to my place. We can talk in quiet there and I can get out of these high heels while we eat take out on my couch. And maybe we have sex later. Maybe we don't." She winked at him and he groaned.

On their way to her apartment they stopped to get Chinese and Steve admired Wanda's drawings on her fridge while she got plates and glasses for them. "She's really good." He said while looking at the dragon she had drawn of her a few weeks ago.

"Yeah. She's good at everything."

"So she takes after her mom?" Steve asked with a grin.

"Smooth, Rogers."

They sat down on her couch and talked about pretty much everything while eating their food. He didn't just ask her about herself but also about her child and he seemed genuinely interested. God, was this guy even real? She only told him that Wanda's father wasn't in the picture and she was thankful that he didn't ask more. It was a topic she didn't like to talk about. He told her about the army, how he served with Sam and Bucky and that he met Tony during one of his visits to Afghanistan. She told him that she was originally from Russia and pretty much on her own since she was a kid and that Wanda was the greatest thing that had ever happened to her.

She put her plate on her coffee table when she was done eating. "You wanna see my bedroom?"

Steve almost choked on his beer. "Are you sure? You don't have to-"

"I know. I want to. I want you." He was attractive, nice and funny. He actually seemed to care about her kid and that probably turned on every mom. And she hadn't had sex in years and she was fucking horny. "So what do you say?"

"Yeah, of course." He put his beer down. "But only if you're sure."

He was so sweet. "I am." She stood up and offered him her hand. He took it and she pulled him up. "Hi." She smiled and pulled his head down to kiss him.

"Hi." He said breathlessly after they kissed until her lungs started to burn. "Where's your bedroom now?"

She laughed and led him by his hand to her room. She turned around to face him when they were in her room and suddenly got nervous. It had been so long since she had been with a man. Steve cupped her face and kissed her softly.

"You okay?"

She nodded. "Yeah, it's just been some time for me."

"For me, too. We don't have to have sex tonight."

"No, I want you. Do you want me too?"

"Yes, of course. You have no idea how much."

She smiled and kissed him again. She wasn't nervous anymore because she trusted him and the kiss quickly grew deeper and hotter. They landed on her bed with him on top of her and she unbuttoned his shirt and he sat up to slid it of his shoulders. Wow, he had the upper body of a Greek god! Her hands moved to her own blouse and she unbuttoned it and Steve's gaze darkened when he saw her in her bra.

"So beautiful." He breathed and unzipped her pencil skirt and she lifted her lips so he could get her out of it. "Wow, just...Look at you."

She actually blushed and pulled him on top of her again so they could kiss. She unbuckled his belt and shoved his trousers down with her feet. Steve seemed to be amused by that and pushed his hands under the cups of her bra and brushed his thumbs over her nipples.

"Oh." She breathed out and leaned up so they could get rid of her bra. He looked at her in awe and she didn't feel self-conscious about her body anymore. The pregnancy changed her but Steve seemed to like what he saw. He pressed wet kisses on her neck and chest and sucked on her breast while his hand kneaded the other one. Jesus, his beard felt amazing against her skin. He kissed his way over her stomach to her waist. He placed a kiss on her hip bone. His fingers slipped under her waistline. "Can I?"

She nodded and lifted her hips so he could slip of her panties. He kissed her inner thigh and left a hickey which made her laugh. She felt his smirk against her skin and she wanted to tell him a thing or two but then he buried his face between her legs and no coherent thought left her mouth.

"Oh _fuck!"_ She bit her lip while he ate her out like a champ. He licked over her folds, his tongue darted shortly into her and she pretty much pressed her cunt into his face. He planted one big hand on her stomach and pressed her back into the mattress. His tongue moved to her clit and he lapped at it, drew circles with his tongue and began to suck on it when he pushed one finger into her. Oh God, she had missed this. One hand flew to his hair to grab it while she moaned his name. She hoped her walls were thick enough so no one could hear her. Her whole body was on fire and she could barely think. He added another finger and thrust them faster into her.

"Don't stop!" She keened and moved her free hand to her stomach where his was and laced their fingers together. She could feel him smile against her cunt and he started to rub on her sweet spot inside her and bit lightly on her clit and she was gone. She moaned his name and he thrust and licked her through her orgasm and he only stopped when she tugged on his hair because it was getting too much. Holy shit! Her whole body was covered in sweat and she hadn't felt this good and relaxed in ages. "Wow!"

Steve dropped his chin on her pubic mound and looked up at her with a grin on his face. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." She laughed and he kissed his way up her body. He smiled at her and gave her a deep kiss so she could taste herself. He was hard between her legs and after she got some strength back into her legs she shoved his briefs down with her feet. She grabbed his length and glanced down to get a look at him. Wow, she was right. He really was well endowed.

"Um, yeah...I'm a bit over average."

"A bit? You ever thought about doing porn?"

He snorted and pecked her lips. "Can't say I have. Why? Should I?"

"I don't share." She said and began to stroke him.

"Condoms?" He moaned into her mouth. Right!

"They're in my bathroom."

"What? All the way over there?"

"Well, I don't want my daughter to find them in my nightstand. And it's not like I needed them." She felt the need to defend herself.

"You're right." He kissed her deeply. "Sorry. I get them." He got out of bed and she already missed the feel of his body on her. He returned with the whole box in his hand and she laughed. "What?"

"Someone's eager!"

"Hey, I'm not getting up to get another one when you want a second round." He grinned and threw the box at her. She caught it and got a condom out. He joined her back in the bed and took the condom out of her hands and rolled it onto his cock. He really had a beautiful cock. It was so pretty, she wanted to take a picture. She laid down on her back and he settled between her legs.

"Are you sure?" Steve asked her after a long kiss and she nodded. She wanted him and she trusted him. He entered her slowly and it knocked the air out of her lungs. "You okay?" He stopped pushing into her and looked at her with worry on his face.

"Yes. It's just been a while. Keep going." She kissed him and he pushed slowly into her until he bottomed out. She felt full and in heaven. "Oh _God!" S_ he moaned and he grunted in agreement. Steve gave her time to get used to his size and moved slowly in and out of her. She wrapped her legs around his waist and crossed her ankles on the small of his back.

"Steve. More, please." She rasped out and he thrust into her deeper and harder. God, it was amazing. She forgot how great sex was. She never wanted to leave this bed again. They exchanged sloppy open-mouth kisses while they moved in sync. He rubbed every right spot inside her and she could feel him throbbing and pulsing. She could tell that he was close and she slid a hand between her bodies to reach the finish line with him. She rubbed on her clit matching his deep thrusts and one particular powerful one pushed her over the edge and he followed her as soon as the first waves of her orgasm hit her.

"That was amazing." He breathed out after they both caught their breaths.

"Yeah." She cupped his face and kissed him softly. He pulled out of her and got rid of the condom. He tugged her against his chest and ran his fingers through her hair. God, she forgot how nice cuddling after sex was.

"I don't want this to be an one night stand, Natasha. I want to date you." She looked up at him and he smiled. "I want to date you and Wanda. Wait, that sounded weird. I-"

"I know what you mean. Don't worry. Are you sure though?" She had to make sure. She was a mom. Guys usually didn't go for single moms.

"Of course. I really like you. And Wanda. I just don't want to spend time with you. I wanna spend time with you and your kid."

God, he was too good to be true. And it was good that Steve bought the whole condom box because they used two more that night. She rode him into the mattress and after a break to eat more take out he took her from behind with her biting into the pillows to muffle her screams of pleasure.

* * *

Steve understood that she didn't want Wanda to know about them until she knew that this between them was serious. She didn't want Wanda to fall in love with Steve only to have him disappear out of her life. After five months of dating and Wanda sometimes asking her what the purple spots on her neck were she was ready to tell her about Steve. Wanda seemed excited when she told her that she and Steve were more than friends.

"Do you kiss?"

"Yes." Among other things. Not that she would tell her four year old about that. Steve had visited her during her lunch break yesterday and fucked her on her desk.

"Do you like him?"

"I love him." She admitted to her kid.

Wanda's eyes grew big. "You do?"

"Yeah, nugget."

"Does he make you smile?"

"Yes, he does."

"Does he still like dragons?"

"I think so."

"Okay." Wanda nodded.

Steve came that evening to dinner and did not only have a bouquet of flowers for Natasha but a little one for Wanda as well and she fell in love with him again right there when he kneeled down and gave the flowers to her daughter. They had dinner and then later they tucked Wanda into her bed and Wanda asked Steve to read her a bedtime story. She blew Wanda a kiss before she closed the door.

Steve's hand moved to her waist and he gently pressed her against the wall next to Wanda's door. "I can get used to this."

She was beaming. "Really?"

"Yeah, really!"

Steve helped with the dishes and only after she was sure that Wanda was sleep she took Steve to her bedroom and let him made love to her. She wanted him to stay the night but she didn't want to overwhelm Wanda with so many new situations.

"Where's Steve?" Wanda asked the next morning rubbing her eyes with her little hands when she woke her daughter up.

"He left after we tucked you in." Well, two hours and three orgasms later.

"He can sleep here, Mommy." She said and she was surprised. "I know that adults have sleepovers. He's nice and you love him. He should sleep in your bed to cuddle with you."

She kissed her daughter's forehead. "Okay, next time he sleeps here. And you're okay with all of this?"

"Yes, Mommy."

Steve stayed the night the next time he came over for a movie night and it seemed like he was more into Disney movies than Wanda. He even bought a bed for Wanda and put it in his guestroom so she and Wanda could stay at his place in Brooklyn. God, he truly was perfect. She would never let him go again. Wanda adored Steve and her heart melted when Steve asked her if she was okay with it if Steve would sometimes do something with Wanda without Natasha so he could get to know her better.

Two years later Steve proposed with Wanda's help and she cried when Steve asked her when Wanda was sleeping if she could imagine him adopting Wanda after they got married. She could and they asked Wanda the next morning what she was thinking about Steve adopting her over breakfast.

"Does that mean you'll be my Daddy? Like Sam and Bucky are Pietro's Daddies?"

"Yes, Wanda. But only if you want that. Your mom's okay with it."

Wanda hopped of her chair and jumped into Steve's lap. "Yes! Can I call you Daddy?"

She smiled at the sight the two of them made. "Only if you want to, Wanda."

"I want to, Daddy." She whispered and buried her tiny face in his muscular chest. Steve kissed her forehead and looked at Natasha with tears in his eyes.

"I love you both so much." She whispered and brushed her hand through Wanda's hair and leaned over to kiss Steve.

"We love you, too." Wanda yawned and stayed on Steve's lap for the rest of breakfast.

She and Wanda changed their last name to Rogers after the wedding and adoption and the three of them moved into a pretty brownstone house with a small garden in Brooklyn. Natasha was crushed when the doctors told her that she couldn't have more children but Steve kissed her temple and told her that he was already overjoyed with their little girl. Their marriage had its ups and downs but she and Steve truly loved each other and their little girl grew into a smart and beautiful woman.


	42. I didn't want you to be alone

_Sam and Steve are hiding in Europe and Natasha tracks them down keep to her promise of not wanting Steve to be alone._

* * *

"You think anyone recognized us?" Sam asked and followed him into the small house they rented under false names outside Copenhagen. They had been in Kiev taking out a human trafficking ring after Nakia gave them the intel. The girls were now safe and the men were arrested. He wasn't Captain America anymore but he would always help when he was needed.

"Nah, I think we're good or we'd be already all over the news." He assured him and dropped his duffel bag on the floor. "You hungry?"

"Starving."

He nodded and went to the kitchen to see what he could make for him and Sam. They had been on the run for six months now and he was still worried that someone would recognize them. He had fake passport and a new look with longer hair and a beard but they still could be made. And he was worried that the others would be found and get back thrown into the Raft. Clint reunited with his family in an unknown location, Scott returned to the States and Wanda after spending a few weeks with him and Sam chose to go to Edinburgh where Vision had been waiting for her. Everyone was safe so far but he knew that could change within a second. Well, he didn't know if everyone was safe. He hadn't heard from Natasha since she let him and Bucky escape in Leipzig. T'challa had told him that he reported her to Ross and that she was now on the run too. But he didn't know where she was and if she was safe. Clint had told him not to worry too much and that being in hiding was like second nature to her but he still worried about her so fucking much. Did she need him? Was she in danger? What if she was hurt and no one was there to help her? Did she miss him? He sure did. He missed her more than words could explain. He missed her coy smile, her eyes full of mischief and the way she had always been there for him.

"You're thinking about her, aren't you?" Sam was suddenly standing at the door frame and looking at him.

"Hm?" He decided to play dumb but of course Sam saw right through him.

"You always get that certain look when you're thinking about her. Don't worry, she's fine. Probably sitting on a beach drinking mojitos or something." Sam walked in and clapped his shoulder. "She's resourceful, smart and adaptable. She's okay, I just know it." Sam looked into the cupboards and fridge and made them omelettes for dinner.

He would have send her a burner phone if he knew where she was so that she could contact him if she needed him. She could be anywhere in the world and he would never find her. No one would. He had the suspicion that Clint knew where Nat was but he didn't tell him. He just hoped that Natasha was safe. He knew what she was capable of and how great she was at her job but a man always worried about the woman he loved.

* * *

They needed to move again and chose Amsterdam as their next destination. They hid the quinjet in one of T'challa's properties near Amsterdam and rented a cottage near the beach. It was nice here and Steve spent a lot of time at the beach thinking about how things got the way they were now. The Accords, Bucky, what happend in Siberia, how Tony was doing and where Natasha was. He'd thought for a brief second today that he'd seen her eyes but the woman had short blonde hair, not Natasha's beautiful red curls. Where was she right now? Did she hate him for tearing the Avengers apart? For taking away her home? God, how did things get so screwed up? Would they ever get to go home? Was the base even home anymore? Did Tony wreck his room?

He got up, brushed the sand off his pants and walked back to the cottage. It was his turn to cook today and it was time for dinner and Sam got a bit cranky when he was hungry.

He heard Sam laughing when he walked up the stairs and unlocked the front door. Was he watching TV or talking to Wanda on the phone? He opened the door and then he heard _her._ Her deep and rich laughter filled the small house and his chest with joy. She was okay. She was safe. She was here. He ran into the living room and there she was sitting on the couch with a steaming cup of tea in her hands. With short blonde hair. It had been her eyes he saw this morning in town.

"Natasha!"

She gave him one of her signature smirks. "Hey soldier."

"She was sitting on the stairs when I came back from grocery shopping." Sam explained with a grin on his face.

"Don't make me sound like some stray!" Natasha laughed and took a sip from her tea.

Sam stood up. "Anyways, I think I'll head into town and see what's happening there. See you guys later." He grabbed his jacket and keys and left but not before giving Steve a pointed look. Sam had been begging him to make a move on Natasha for years now.

"I like your new look. Very lumberjack. I hope you have the flannel that goes with it?" Natasha grinned at him over the rim of her tea cup.

"You're blonde." He managed to blurt out. God, he was such a moron. He wished he was as suave as Bucky had been back in the day. Natasha chuckled and patted the empty spot on the couch next to her. He sat down and she put her mug on the coffee table and then wrapped her arms around him. He was a bit surprised that she did it but he hugged her back and she somehow ended half on his lap. "I missed you." He admitted with his chin on top of her head and his arms pressing her closer to him. He never wanted to let go of her again. "I was so worried about you, Nat."

"I'm a big girl." She mumbled against his collarbone. "I can take care of myself."

"I know. I know that." Natasha made no sign that she wanted the embrace to end so he tightened his hold on her. "But not knowing where you were...if you were safe...If you hated me..."

She looked up at him. "I don't hate you. I could never hate you."

"I took everything away from you. The team, your home...your family." He whispered and her hand was on his cheek. "I'm so sorry, Nat."

"What's done is done. It would have happened one way or another." She gave him a small sad smile and stroked his cheek with her thumb. Her eyes were open and soft and not for the first time he wondered if she felt the same.

"Nat? Why are you here?"

"I didn't want you to be alone."

He chuckled lightly. Of course he wouldn't hear immediately what he hoped for. "I'm living with Sam."

"Fine." She rolled her eyes. "I...I didn't want to be alone." He saw so much in her eyes in that moment that it caught his breath. She was so beautiful.

"Natasha-"

"I missed you, too." She admitted in a small voice and her gaze fell to his lips. "I don't know what to do. This is...this is all so new for me."

He cupped her face in his hands and looked into her eyes for permission. As always she understood him without any words spoken and he pressed his lips softly on hers. She made a noise in the back of her throat that sounded a lot like a sigh and then kissed him back. They pulled apart with a smile on their faces and then she slanted her lips over his again and he felt how she poured everything that she couldn't say into the kiss.

"You're not alone, Natasha." He whispered against her full lips and gave her a short kiss. She smiled with her eyes still closed. "You'll never be alone again."


	43. I didn't want you to be alone II

**_Spoilers for Infinity War!_**

 _Sequel to I didn't want you to be alone._

 _Steve and Natasha are dating and on the run with Sam until Bruce calls Steve with Tony's burner phone and Steve doesn't know what Bruce being back means for him and Natasha._

* * *

They were still in hiding, moving to another place every few weeks and taking on missions when people needed them. Having Natasha with them made things a lot easier. She had connections that he and Sam could only dream about and she knew how to stay under the radar. He wasn't so worried anymore that someone would find them. Natasha knew what she was doing.

They hadn't put a label on what they were doing but Steve liked to think that they were dating, that she was his girl. They slept with each other and started to share a room after Sam walked in on them with Natasha sitting on the kitchen counter and Steve's face buried between her legs. Sam had screamed and smacked against the door frame and came an hour later back with sanitizer forcing him and Natasha to clean the kitchen. _This is where we eat, man!_

Sam was happy for them and he was happy with Natasha. He finally was with her and he didn't care anymore that he was a fugitive. If this was what it took to finally be able to kiss her and hold her than he was more than willing to pay that price. He just felt bad for the others. And for Sam who constantly complained that he and Natasha were too loud and that it had been ages since he had been with a woman and if Natasha didn't know anyone for him.

He wondered if he was addicted to Natasha. He couldn't get enough of her. Of the sound of her voice, of her lovely smell and the way she looked at him after she woke up. He loved her. He loved her more than anything. He loved how she smiled at him with her blonde hair spilled on the pillows after they made love and her hands grabbing his beard and her playfully threatening him to never shave it off or he would lose access to get into her pants. He whispered into her hair one night when they were on their way back from Syria with Sam snoring in the back of the quinjet that he loved her. She looked at him with big eyes and then pulled the collar of his battered uniform into her tiny fists. It still amazed him how small she was compared to him because Natasha was to him bigger than life. She didn't say it back but she kissed him and promised to never leave him. He knew he had no right not after everything that happened but he had never been happier than he was since Natasha showed up in Amsterdam and kissed him on the couch in that tiny cottage.

Bucky contacted him to let him know that Shuri removed his triggers and that he was himself again. He immediately wanted to fly with Sam and Natasha to Wakanda to see him. He missed Buck so much in the last one and a half year and he couldn't wait to introduce Natasha to him. He was so proud that he had a girl like her and truth to be told he wanted to show her off. Not that one should compare women but none of the girls Bucky had ever dated were as amazing and beautiful as Nat.

But then Wanda and Vision needed them in Edinburgh and they fought off aliens who were after the mind stone. And then his burner phone rang and it wasn't Tony who called but Bruce. _Bruce was back._ He finished the call and walked back to the quinjet where Natasha and Sam were talking to Wanda and Vision. Vision didn't look so good and he knew that they had to return to the States. Bruce didn't tell him much but it looked like something big was coming and Vision needed help. Natasha looked over to him with a private smile on her face. He told her to fly the jet to the facility but not that Bruce was back. What did his return mean for them? They never talked about Bruce. Did she still have feelings for him? Would she leave him for Bruce? Did she never tell him she loved him because her heart belonged to Banner? He knew that he should worry about Vision and the mind stone and the impending alien invasion but he couldn't stop thinking about Bruce and Natasha. He remembered how hurt he had been when he saw that Natasha was interested in Bruce. Steve had been working on his courage to ask her out while he had been looking for Bucky and then when he finally saw her again she was flirting with Bruce. He still didn't understand how that happened.

"You okay?" Natasha's small hand was suddenly on his shoulder.

"Yeah. Just thinking." He covered her hand with his. _I love you. Please don't leave me._

"I'm excited to see Rhodey again." She smiled a little. "I'm even excited to see Tony."

He hadn't told the others that Tony was MIA, maybe even dead. He hoped that wherever he was that he was okay.

Rhodey was happy to see them and Natasha greeted him with a warm hug. Steve was glad to see that Rhodey could walk again and seemed to have found peace with his condition. He knew that Sam would want to talk to Rhodey later in private.

And then there he was. Bruce was standing in the hallway and Steve had never been more scared in his entire life. He couldn't see Natasha's face because she was standing with her back to him when Bruce showed up.

"Hi, Bruce." She said calmly and he had no idea what that meant. Was she happy that he was back? Mad? Sad? Confused? Would he lose her?

"...Nat."

"This is awkward." Sam murmured under his breath and he wanted to punch him but he had to agree. He had no idea how to react. He couldn't lose Nat. She was the best thing that ever happened to him.

Rhodey and Bruce went with them to Wakanda and he didn't miss how Bruce was always near Natasha. He couldn't help but grin when Bruce got owned by Shuri about what to do with Vision's mind stone. Looked like Banner wasn't that smart after all. Thanos and his army were close and T'challa asked him to accompany him to the armory where he would get his new gear. He saw before he left the room how Bruce grabbed Natasha's arm to make her follow him into to corner of the lab. What would they talk about? Would they get back together? Would he lose the woman of his dreams? He felt bad for only thinking about Natasha when the world was about to end.

He was on his way back to the lab with his new shields on his arms when Natasha was walking towards him. Was she going to break up with him? Were they ever even a real couple? She took his hand and dragged him around a corner so they were out of sight.

"Why didn't you tell me that it was Bruce who called you?" She asked with an arched eyebrow.

"I didn't want you to know he was back." He answered truthfully because he couldn't lie to her.

"Why?"

"Are...Are you going to break up with me?" He asked quietly and couldn't bare to look at her.

"What?" Her hands were on his face forcing him to look at her. "What makes you think that? Because Bruce is back?"

He nodded. "Yeah."

She sighed and kissed him briefly. "Bruce being back doesn't change anything between us. I'm glad he's back and I told him that. I also told him that you and I are together."

"You did?" He felt hopeful again.

She smiled. "Yeah. Bruce and I...we were never like we are. Never. You need to understand that. He was...I honestly don't even know what I had been thinking when I went after him...I think it always had been you, Steve. Even back then. I just was too blind to realize that."

He leaned his forehead against hers. He was so relieved. "I thought I would lose you."

"Never." She promised and kissed him. And then she looked at him with mischief and a bit of uncertainty in her eyes. "So I've been thinking...Almost everyone is here...and after we dealt with that invasion and kicked ass...do you think T'challa can officiate weddings?"

Wait, what? He was surprised his jaw didn't hit the floor. Was she asking him to marry her? "Nat, did you...did you just propose?"

Her cheeks turned pink and she never looked more beautiful. "Um, yes?"

He'd never been happier in his life before. "Yes, I'll marry you, you crazy broad."

Natasha beamed and pulled his head down to kiss him. "I...I love you."

She said it. She told him that she loved him and she even asked him to marry her. "I love you so much, Nat."

She kissed him again and walked with him hand and hand back to the others. They would defeat Thanos and then they would get married. He hoped that Buck would agree to be his best man.

He was glad that he didn't know in that moment that he would lose everything.

Bucky vanished in front of his eyes with his name on his lips. Bucky was gone. Natasha ran to him and then seconds later began to turn to dust in his arms. He tried to hold her, clutched her against his body to stop her from disappearing but he was powerless. Of course he wouldn't get a happy ending. He had allowed himself to dream about being her husband and now she was gone and he had no idea how to get her back. How was he supposed to go on without her? Why didn't he die too? Why did he have to stay here? Why couldn't he follow her into oblivion? He still heard her voice in his head. The words she whispered before she vanished.

 _I'll always love you._

She was gone. And he was all alone. She didn't keep her promise.

* * *

 _*runs away*_


	44. Road trip

**_Don't worry no one dies in this one shot!_**

 _Steve invites Natasha, Bucky and Sam to go on a roadtrip and he soon suspects that Bucky and Sam are messing with him and Natasha._

* * *

Steve was putting the rest of the equipment into the trunk of the SUV when a grumpy Natasha in a hoodie that looked a lot like it was the one he had been looking for weeks threw her duffel bag at him.

"Morning, Nat." He put her duffel bag into the trunk.

Natasha just grunted and climbed into the backseat of the car and curled herself into a ball. Damn, he had hoped she would sit next to him in the passengers seat. She wasn't very talkative because it was four in the morning and Natasha hated to get up early when it wasn't for a mission. He'd asked her to come with him, Sam and Bucky on a road trip. He was actually surprised that she agreed to the whole thing. He planned the trip so Bucky and Sam would get to know each other better and hopefully stop bitching about the other one. He asked Natasha to tag along so she could keep the two of them in check since they were both afraid of Nat. Not that Bucky or Sam would ever admit that. And he asked Nat to come with them because he liked having her around, not that he would admit that.

Bucky came into the garage next with three cups of coffee and handed him one. "Nat already here?"

He thanked Buck for the coffee and pointed at the car. Bucky nodded and opened the door and handed Nat her a cup. She mumbled a thanks and closed the door again. "I can see Nat is a joy to be around with in the early hours." Bucky laughed. "I hope that doesn't bother you since you're an early bird."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Buck smirked. "I think you already know, punk." Bucky's face fell. "I thought it would just be you, Nat and me."

"What is _he_ doing here?" Sam asked at the same time.

He grabbed Sam's backpack to put it in the car. "The four of us are doing some team bonding." He said in his Captain America voice and he could see that it worked on Sam. He should have known that Buck was immune to it. "If you don't get into this car, I'll tell Nat that you're the one who emptied her conditioner." He whispered and that seemed to work. Natasha had been furious when her conditioner was empty since she ordered that stuff from Korea and it took some time until it arrived.

Sam was closer to the passenger door and beat Bucky when it came to calling out shotgun so he took a seat next to Natasha and Steve saw how Buck was checking if she had heard them but she was already asleep with the coffee cup in her hand. Sam asked if he could have her coffee and Bucky took it out of her hand and gulped it down in one long sip never breaking eye contact with Sam. Boy, those four days would be fun...

* * *

Steve wanted to drive up to the Canadian border through the woods that were now so beautiful because of the Indian summer. He had been driving for three hours and he could go for more but Natasha woke up and decided that they had to stop for breakfast. Not that he'd cared if Sam and Bucky were against a stop because he would never say no to Nat but they were hungry as well. Natasha looked so small in his hoodie and he wondered how she would look only wearing his t-shirt and nothing else. He quickly pushed the thought away fearing that she somehow found out that he sometimes thought about her being naked.

She told him to order french toast for her and left to use the ladies room.

"Why are _we_ even here?" Bucky asked with a grin on his face while they looked for a table at the old diner. "This sounds more like a romantic getaway for you and your girl."

"She's not my girl!"

"But you want her to be!" Sam singsonged and picked the menu up. Bucky nodded and he feared that this could be the thing that he and Sam would bond over. That would not be helpful at all. He liked Nat. Truth to be told he was in love with her but he didn't know what to do about it. She didn't seem like she wanted a relationship or gave him any hints that she was into him and he was too chicken to ask her out. Things would be really awkward if she turned him down.

The waitress came and took their orders and Natasha came a few minutes later to their table with styled hair and make up on her face. How did she manage to do all of that in a small bathroom? He stood up and pulled her chair out when she reached the table and gave him a small smile as a thanks.

"Great, don't make us look bad, Stevie!" Bucky joked and filled Nat's mug with coffee.

"You don't need Steve for that." She shot back and winked at him over the rim of her mug. Bucky made offended noises and Sam rolled his eyes. And he tried his best not blush because she had winked at him. The waitress came back with their food and Natasha dug right in. After getting food and coffee into her she wasn't so grumpy anymore and seemed even a bit excited about the road trip.

Natasha took the car keys out of his hands after they were done with breakfast and decided that she would drive next. She changed the radio to 90s pop which caused Sam to groan but he stopped when she glared at him. Steve managed to call shotgun and sat next to her. She had sunglasses on and hummed to the music. She looked so happy in that moment and he already knew what he would draw next. She sometimes looked over to him with a small smile on her face and his heart was fluttering in his chest. God, he was so in love with her.

Sam suggested to play 21 questions and Nat won every round after only a few questions. He sometimes truly wondered if she could read minds. God, he hoped not! He was thinking about her all the time and some thoughts were...not very gentlemanlike.

They stopped in a beautiful small town where he booked rooms for them at a B&B. He would share a room with Sam and Bucky and Nat would get her own room. That had been his plan and he did book a three bed room and a one bed room but apparently there was a mix up.

"Sorry, sir." The young girl at the reception stuttered. "We have a double-bedded room and one king size bedroom under your name."

"That's not what I booked!"

"I'm sorry, Captain Rogers but it's in the computer and we have no other rooms."

It wasn't the girl's fault. He could share the bed with Bucky or Sam so Natasha didn't have to share the bed with one of them. He didn't want to make her uncomfortable. Bucky already announced that he wouldn't sleep in one bed with Sam and before he could say that he would share it with him, Sam snatched the keys out of his hands and walked with Bucky in tow to the room with two beds. Assholes! He was starting to think that one of them changed the booking.

He gave Nat an excusing smile. "I'll sleep on the floor, don't worry."

She shook her head and took the room key out of his hands. "Nonsense. We can share it. The bed is big enough and I'm actually glad I'll share the room with you and not with Sam or James."

That made him happy. "Really?"

"Don't act so surprised, Rogers!" She grinned and walked up the stairs to their room. He would have loved to say that he didn't check her out but that would have been a lie and he was always honest. They freshened up and met Sam and Bucky downstairs to check out the town. The looks these two were giving him just strengthened his theory that they set him up.

The town was really pretty and they checked out some shops and saw that there would have an open cinema at a park tonight and decided to go there. They found a nice restaurant for dinner and then walked to the park. They didn't have blankets with them and he offered Nat to sit on his jacket so her pants wouldn't get wet from the grass. She made room for him and he couldn't help but enjoy to sit so close to her. He could feel her warmth and smell the subtle perfume she was wearing when she wasn't on the job. Sam threw him a knowing look before he sat down on his own jacket, he decided to ignore him and asked Nat if she wanted popcorn.

"Yeah." She stood up. Wait, he was supposed to get it! "You guys want some, too?" Bucky and Sam nodded and before he could give her money she was already gone.

"I can't believe you just let her get her popcorn alone and then you're not even paying for it!" Bucky mocked. "Some kind of gentleman you are!"

He punched his shoulder. "She's paying for your popcorn, too!"

"I'm not trying to woo her!" Bucky readjusted the glove on his hand. "And I got her a coffee this morning!"

Sam decided to join the conversation. "You're gonna sleep shirtless tonight so Nat can see a show?"

"I know you two somehow fucked me over with the reservations." He said through gritted teeth. "You guys ever thought how this affects her? Forcing her to share a room with one of us?"

"I don't think she'll mind sharing one with you." Bucky grinned and then changed the topic because Nat came towards them arms full of popcorn and soft drinks. He quickly got up and helped her carry the stuff. They sat down next to each other and shared the popcorn. He wondered if Natasha felt the same tingle every time their hands accidentally touched. He should have checked what movies they would show today because he wouldn't have agreed to this if he knew that it was horror night. He jumped every time something creepy happened on screen and he saw Nat smirking out of the corner of his eyes.

"Don't worry, Captain. I'll protect you." She leaned over and whispered into his ear. It sent a shiver down his spine. Was she doing this on purpose to him?

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." She nodded. "I'll always have your back." She smiled and intertwined their fingers together. He was staring at her hands and Natasha was looking at the screen again. Was she just holding his hand because of the movie or because she wanted to touch him? He decided not to think about it too much and just enjoy this. Who knew if he'd ever get to hold her hand again. It was really nice. Her hand fitted perfectly into his. Did she notice that too?

Half way through the film she pulled her hand away and he couldn't help but be disappointed. "Steve?"

"Yeah?" He whispered back.

"I'm cold. Could you...could you-" She stopped talking and pulled his arm over her shoulder and snuggled into his side. "Is this okay?"

It was more than okay. God, he felt like he went to heaven. "Yeah." He looked over her head and saw how Sam and Bucky were watching them with smug grins on their faces. He rolled his eyes and focused on how nice Natasha felt tugged against his body. He rubbed his hand over her arm and at one point she wrapped her arm around his waist and he wondered how this was what dating her would be like. It was nice, it was more than nice. She felt perfect tugged against him and he never wanted to let go of her. But he had to when the movie marathon finished and they had to go back to the B&B. They talked about the movies and he wondered if things would now be weird between them. She didn't try to hold his hand on their way back so he figured that she didn't want to touch him more. He was sad but not surprised. Of course a woman like her wasn't interested in him. Bucky and Sam said goodnight and shut the door behind them.

"I wonder if they're both still alive tomorrow." Natasha joked and unlocked the door. "Is it okay if I get ready for bed first?"

"Sure." She smiled and disappeared into the bathroom. He got his stuff out of his duffel bag and sat down on the bed. In all those years they never slept in a bed before. On missions they took shifts so one could sleep if they had to share a room but never once did they share a bed at the same time. He just hoped that he wouldn't embarrass himself. The bedroom door opened and Natasha came in wearing a camisole and shorts and her hair in a bun on top of her head. She looked breathtaking like this.

"Bathroom is all yours." She put her clothes on a chair and slid under the blankets on the left side of the bed.

He stopped staring at her and went to get ready for bed. Natasha was reading something on her phone when he got back and laid down on his side of the bed. She turned the lights off and laid down so she was facing him.

"This road trip was a good idea."

"Yeah?"

"I've never been on one. Thanks for inviting me."

"Of course, Nat."

She smiled a little. "Good night, Steve."

"Good night."

She closed her eyes and he did the same praying he wouldn't reach for her during the night. He woke up the next morning relieved that he wasn't the one who reached for her and overjoyed that she was the one who reached for him. Natasha was sleeping on his chest with her arms wrapped around him and made cute little noises in her sleep. He prayed the loud pounding of his heart didn't wake her up. Wasn't this what he always dreamed about? Waking up with her in his arms? He carefully brushed her hair out of her face to get a look at her. She looked so peaceful and young. Was she maybe dreaming about him? Her hold on him tightened and she rubbed her cheek against his chest. He wanted to spend the whole day like this. He moved his hips a little so he didn't poke her and closed his eyes again. He was already drifting off again when a loud knock on the door startled him.

"Are you guys up yet? Hurry before breakfast is gone!" Sam yelled from the other side of the room.

Natasha's eyes opened, she blinked a few times, her eyes widened and she jumped out of his embrace and the bed. "Sorry!" She mumbled, grabbed her duffel bag and ran into the bathroom.

Natasha was already in the car when he was done in the bathroom and ate a cinnamon bun in the backseat. Sam was sitting next to her and looking at her with a raised eyebrow. Natasha glared at him and he stopped looking at her.

"Did something happened between you last night?" Bucky whispered to him when they went back inside to pay for the rooms.

"What? Of course not." He put his credit card back in his wallet.

"Natasha is acting all weird." Bucky lowered his voice again. "Did you guys have sex?"

"No, and now drop it!" He hissed and checked the GPS when they were back at the car to see if the routes were free. Natasha didn't talk in the next hours and Sam was mostly leading the conversation with Bucky throwing a few insults here and there. Sam saw a sign for a lake near by and wanted to stop there. Bucky agreed and Natasha didn't say anything. Why was she acting like this? Was is really that bad to sleep in his arms?

They got a blanket out of the car and sat down on a jetty. He didn't understand why no people were here, the weather was great. Nat rolled up her pants and dangled her feet in the water. He wanted to talk to her about last night, he wanted to apologize to her. He didn't know for what but she needed to know that he was sorry if he made her uncomfortable.

Sam found online a museum in the area with vintage cars and to Steve's surprise Bucky said that he would come with him. They took the car and promised to pick them up in two hours. He had a feeling they left so he could be alone with Natasha.

He watched the SUV drive away when he felt movement on the blanket. Natasha was standing up and pulling her shirt over her head.

"Um, Nat? What are you doing?" She started to unbutton her jeans and he reminded himself to look at her face and not at her half-naked body.

"I wanna take a swim." She got out of her pants and was standing in her underwear in front of him. "You're coming?" First she was not talking to him at all and now she wanted to swim with him? She jumped into the water and smiled at him. "Come, the water's great."

He got out of his shirt. If this was what she wanted than she would get it. He would always give her what she wanted. He slid his jeans down and jumped off the jetty. Natasha was gone when he surfaced and before he could start looking for her, small hands were on his shoulders and pushed him into the water. He heard her laughter and grabbed her leg to pull her under. They kept submerging each other until Natasha swallowed water and started to cough. He gently hit her back to help her get the water out.

"Better?"

She nodded. "Yeah. Thanks." She turned in his arms and her face was only a few inches away from his. His gaze fell to her lips and she licked them.

"Nat? About la-" He didn't come any further because she was suddenly kissing him. Her hands were grasping the hair in the back of his neck and she slung one leg around his waist to keep him close. He wanted this, he wanted her but he was so very confused.

It broke his heart but he pulled away. "Why are you doing this?"

Natasha's eyes widened and she let go of him. "Oh, God! I'm sorry! I completely misread that!" She swam back so fast to the jetty that even he had problems to keep up with her. She was already on the jetty when he caught up.

"Wait!" He grabbed her ankle and caused her to fall. "Oh fuck!" He climbed out of the water. "Shit! Are you hurt? I'm so sorry!" He rolled her onto her back and loomed over her to check for injuries.

"I'm fine. Don't worry." She tried to get up but he pushed her back on the blanket.

"Why did you kiss me?"

She didn't look into his eyes. "I thought we were having a moment. Sorry."

"No, we were having a moment." He agreed and she was now looking at him. "Why did you jump out of bed this morning?"

She sighed. "I freaked out. I enjoyed waking up in your arms and I know I shouldn't have."

"Why not? I enjoyed it."

She looked at him with big eyes. "You did?"

He brushed the wet hair out of her face. "Yeah. A lot. I would like to do it again. Well, first I wanna take you on a few dates."

Her finger was brushing over his lips. "You could do so much better than me."

"No, I really couldn't." She looked like she wanted to protest so he leaned down and kissed any doubts away. "You're the best thing that ever happened to me." He whispered against her lips and kissed her again.

They were still kissing on the blanket in their underwear when Bucky and Sam came back. They were getting back into their clothes when he saw how Sam begrudgingly gave Bucky a few dollar notes. He knew those assholes set him up!

* * *

 _I know the last one shot was quite emotional and sad but it's just an one shot and that doesn't mean that you need to insult me like one guest review did that I deleted._


	45. Veep (AU)

**For LoneWolfOneill.** I shouldn't have called the one shot Veep because the entire time writing it I heard Selina Meyer asking "Sue, did the President call?"

 _Steve Rogers, the young and single VP of the United States, sees ballerina Natasha Romanoff dancing and is enchanted by her._

* * *

"Natasha!" Her friend Maria who was also the stage manager of the Kennedy Center hissed when she came into her dressing room. Natasha was just getting into her costume for the night. "The VP is here!"

"Can you help me tie my corset?" She asked and turned around to show Maria her back.

"Did you not hear what I just said? Vice President Rogers is here!" She sounded excited but started to tie her corset for her. "Why are you not excited about that?"

"Last week Angelina Jolie was here and you didn't freak out like that!" Natasha laughed and put her tiara on. This season they were performing Swan Lake. She would turn thirty next year, she knew she wouldn't be able to dance for long. Maybe two or three years and then they would move on to younger dancers.

"Well, Jolie is not America's most eligible bachelor! I mean have you seen the guy? I would climb that man like a tree!" Maria smirked and she laughed. "And he's here with his mother! I mean what guy takes his mom to the ballet!"

"You're drooling, Hill!"

Maria stuck her tongue out and left so Natasha could get ready. She stretched her limps, met the other dancers for the prayer circle before the show and then took a deep breath and became Odette. Like always she felt free when she performed on stage and the show went perfectly and they were greeted by loud applause when the curtain fell.

"You were amazing, Tasha!" Her best friend Clint who played Prince Siegfried complimented her.

She smiled. "Thanks! So were you!"

"You wanna get some drinks?" He asked her while checking out the other female dancers. He was currently single and looking for his new girlfriend.

"You sure you wanna get drinks with me? And not with one of them?" She tilted her head towards the girls. Clint grinned and was about to say something when her manager Pepper Potts came running towards her.

"Natasha! Vice President Rogers asks if you could meet him and his mother!" She said with wide eyes. "They're waiting in your dressing room!"

"Holy cow!" Clint breathed but Natasha was annoyed. He asked to meet her but he was already in her room? Pepper looked at her like she couldn't say no so she put a smile on her face and walked to her dressing room. Probably better not to piss of the VP.

Rogers and his mother weren't actually in her room but standing in front of it. Mrs. Rogers came right towards her. "Oh, Miss Romanoff! Thank you so much for meeting us! I'm such a fan of yours!"

"You are?"

"Well, of course! The way you move...It's like magic. You're truly the greatest of your generation. Right, Stevie?" Mrs. Rogers turned to her son who just started at her.

"Right...It's very nice to meet you, Miss Romanoff." He offered her his hand. She took a better look at him and okay he was pretty handsome. She shook his hand. "Likewise, Mr. Vice President."

He smiled at her. He had a really pretty smile. "My mother has been raving about you for some time now and she's right. You are a remarkable dancer."

"Thank you, sir." Oh God, she was still holding his hand! She let go of it and tried her best not to blush. It seemed that VP Rogers also didn't realize they were still holding hands with the way he reacted. "Do you often go to the ballet?"

"No." He shook his head. "But I might change that." He looked into her eyes and she felt a little tingle inside of her.

"Really, Steve?" His mother seemed amused. "What changed your mind?"

"Sir?" A man with a black suit came towards them. "We have to leave."

Rogers smiled at her. "I'm sorry. Duty calls. It was really nice to meet you, Miss Romanoff."

"Yeah, you too. Mister Vice President, Misses Rogers." She nodded at both of them and watched them leave. She began to understand why Rogers was the most eligible bachelor in America.

* * *

VP Rogers came to more performances in the next weeks. Sometimes with his mother, sometimes alone. She only knew that he had been there because Maria told her and the security everywhere gave it away. She wondered why he came so often, was he truly that much of a ballet fan now? Did Maria hit on him and they were a thing? She had no clue and she knew that it was none of her business. She took a cab home after rehearsal and found an invitation from the White House in her mail box. Wow, that was certainly a surprise. She had been invited to attend a gala and was allowed to bring a plus one. She was thinking about inviting Clint but then thought about Maria and her obsession with VP Rogers. She should take her as her date. She looked at the elegant invitation and brushed her fingers over the expensive paper, why had she been invited? She had no contacts to the political world of DC. Did Rogers put her name on the list?

Maria cancelled last minute because of a migraine and it was too late to invite someone else so she had to go alone. She wasn't really thrilled about that but she was a grown woman she could handle it. She just hoped that other artists would be there as well so she wouldn't feel too much out of place.

She showed the Secret Service her invitation and ID and then she was escorted into a ballroom. She'd never been at the White House. She had been living in DC for three years now but she never once did a tour. And now here she was in a room full of important people and she knew no one. She did recognize a few faces but she couldn't just go over to the Secretary of State and introduce herself. She spotted a few actors and singers and was relieved that she wasn't the only non politician here.

She searched for her table and realized with wide eyes that they placed her at the table of the Vice President. So he did invite her. But why?

"Miss Romanoff?"

She turned around and VP Rogers was standing behind her. In a tuxedo and bow tie. Wow, he looked really good. "Mr. Vice President! Hi!" Oh God, she was such a moron.

He smiled at her. "I'm glad you could make it. You look wonderful tonight."

"Thank you." She was very grateful that Pepper managed to get her a Dior gown for the evening. "You looked very handsome."

"Ha, I look like a penguin."

"Well, a very handsome penguin." Did she seriously just say that to the Vice President? What was wrong with her? But Steve laughed and didn't seem offended.

"Thanks." He looked around. "Are you alone here?"

"Yes, my friend had to cancel last minute."

"Then I guess it's my duty to make you feel not so alone here." He smiled but looked unsure like he thought he just crossed a line.

"That would be very lovely, thanks." He pulled her chair out and joined her at the table. They talked over dinner about her work, his work and he told her that he drew. He made a little sketch on her napkin and he really was talented. She liked him, he seemed like a good guy. He was decent, funny and never once traveled his gaze to her breasts.

"You're not asking me if I voted for you and President Fury?" She asked with a smile, Dessert was served and she honestly didn't even notice that other people were sitting at the table as well.

"Should I ask you? What if you voted for our opponent? Not that it matters, he lost." He grinned and took a bit of his creme brulée.

She shook her head in amusement. "Don't worry. I did vote for you. It was actually my first election. I became a US citizen two years ago."

"You're originally from Russia, right?" She nodded. "You ever miss it?"

"No, not really. I was glad when I could leave." She really was. Russia was not a pleasant memory and she left it as soon as possible. Dinner was soon over and a live band started to play.

Rogers gave her a soft smile. "I would ask you to dance but I'm warning you I'm a terrible dancer and you're...well you're a freaking ballerina."

"I'm sure we can manage." His eyes lit up and he offered her his hand. He led her to the dance floor and he really hadn't been lying, he wasn't a great dancer but he didn't step on her feet and after some time they moved in sync over the dance floor. It had been so long since she danced just for fun. It was nice and dancing with him was even more than nice. She liked how his hand felt on the small of her back and how her hand seemed to fit perfectly into his. They didn't break eye contact while they danced and he gave her those little smiles from time to time that made her stomach flutter. She really _liked_ him. It was insane, she barely knew him!

"Natasha-" Steve began and a shiver ran down her spine. This was the first time he used her first name. "I-"

"Excuse me, sir but there's a situation. You're needed in the Oval Office." A man suddenly appeared next to him.

"Thank you, Coulson. I'll be right there." He gave her an excusing look and she couldn't help but be disappointed. She wanted to dance with him the whole night. "I'm sorry, Miss Romanoff. It was really nice talking to you. And dancing with you." He took her hand and kissed the back of it. Oh boy, she only saw men doing this in movies! "Coulson, make sure Miss Romanoff gets home safely when she decides to leave." He smiled at her one last time and then left the ball room.

She left after Rogers left and Coulson led her to a car that drove her home. She put the gown back in the clothing bag and sat down on her bed with her laptop in front of her. She spent the night googling Rogers. He truly was a great guy. He had served in the Army, supported Black Lives Matter and women's right and women from both parties were fawning over him. Even the women on Fox News were charmed by him. And everyone was wondering why he was still single. She found an interview with Oprah where he said that he hadn't just found the right partner yet. She caught herself wondering if she could be that for him.

A bouquet of white and pink roses was waiting for her in her dressing room when she came to work the next day. She checked the card and it was from VP Rogers.

 _I had a lovely time last night with you. I'm sorry I had to leave so sudden._

 _Would you meet me for dinner tomorrow?_

 _I hope you like the roses, Steve._

There was also a number on the card and she fished her phone out of her bag and called it.

"Hello?"

"Um, this is Natasha Roma-"

"Natasha!" She now recognized his voice. "Wow, I'm so happy you called me. I wasn't sure if I was too forward with the flowers-"

"I love them." She quickly said because he sounded uncertain.

"Really? So...Do you wanna have dinner with me tomorrow?"

Going out with the Vice President was probably not a good idea but she had liked his company so much and she wanted to get to know him. "Yes."

"I'm asking you on a date, you got that, right?"

She laughed. "Yes, I did. And the answer is yes."

"Wow, that's...best news I had all week. I'll send a car to pick you up at the Kennedy Center?"

"Yes, that would be great."

"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow."

"I'm looking forward to it, Mr. Vic-"

"Please call me Steve." He interrupted her.

"I'm looking forward to our date, Steve." She was probably grinning like an idiot but she didn't care. She hadn't been on a date in forever and Steve ( _Steve!)_ seemed so nice.

"Me, too." She could hear the smile in his voice. "Bye, Natasha."

She stared at her phone in her hand. She was going on a date with the Vice President of the United States of America! Holy shit! She had to find a dress! Oh God, she didn't even know where they would be going! She had to find Pepper so she could get her a killer outfit. She wanted to impress him, she wanted him to fall in love with her because she had the feeling that she was about to fall in love with him.

* * *

The first chapter of _Still falling for you_ the sequel to _Neighbors_ has been posted.


	46. Veep II (AU)

**Second part to Veep**. Thank you so much for your feedback! I was really amazed that you guys liked this one shot so much and wanted a second part! So here it is!:)

 _AU Natasha finds out how difficult it is to date the Vice President of the United States._

* * *

Natasha quickly changed into a black dress after the show and styled her hair into a chignon and a car was already waiting for her when she stepped outside the Kennedy Center. She got in and was driven to a nice restaurant that looked like it was closed. What was she doing here? The driver stopped the car and opened the door for her. She thanked him confused and walked inside the restaurant where a waiter led her to a table in the back where Steve was waiting for her.

He got up from his seat and walked over to her. "Hi, Natasha. Wow, you look amazing."

"Thank you. You do too." And he really did in his dress shirt and slacks. She liked this look better than the tuxedo. He seemed more like himself like this. Steve pulled her chair out and she sat down. He really had manners, his mother raised him right. "You don't have to send me flowers every day, Steve." He had sent her another bouquet today. This time it were freesias and she was amazed that he chose them because she loved them.

"Does it bother you?"

She shook her head. "No, of course not."

"Then I'll keep sending you flowers." He smiled sheepishly and her heart fluttered. Oh boy, she found one of the good ones, hadn't she? "I hope this empty restaurant doesn't make you uncomfortable but with my job...It's the only way to have a quiet and nice evening."

"No, it's okay. I don't mind."

He nodded smiling and the waiter came to take their order. Steve asked her about her show and admitted that he only went to so many performances because of her.

"Really?" She asked with wide eyes and the butterflies in her stomach were dancing.

His cheeks were slightly pink. "Yeah. I just...The first time I saw you on that stage...I was blown away by your beauty and your elegance. My mother is right...the way you move is magic."

She was pretty sure that she was now the one blushing. She heard plenty of compliments for her dancing in her life but Steve was different. "Thank you."

"And I was thinking about ways to ask you out but...well, I don't have the best track record when it comes to women but my friend told me to grow some fucking balls or he would go to one of your shows and ask you out himself."

"Did you just curse?" She chuckled. "And what makes your friend think I would go out with him?"

"You don't know Bucky, every girl wants to go out with him." She didn't know this Bucky but why go out with him if a girl could go out with Steve?

"Well, this girl doesn't." She winked at him and he smiled. "So what are you doing when you're not asking Sue if the President has called?"

He snorted. "Was that just a Veep reference? Well, like I already told you I like to draw and I work out. I have to sit a lot in my job and it's not good for me so I try balance that out. And I like to watch movies. Especially the old Hollywood ones."

"Me, too! I love Audrey Hepburn! And Cary Grant. Maybe we can watch Charade together some time?"

"I'd love that!" He smiled brightly at her and she felt all tingly. Was she already falling in love? She was about to ask him when they could watch it and that she had the movie on DVD and a really comfy couch but then that Coulson dude approached their table and she already knew that she wouldn't like what would happen next.

"I'm so sorry, but the President wants to see you. The situation in the Middle East is getting worse, sir."

Steve groaned but nodded. "I'll be right with you, Phil." Coulson gave her an excusing smile and left. "I am so sorry, Natasha. I wouldn't leave if it wasn't important-"

"I know."

"This still sucks and is unfair to you. I promise I'll make it up to you." He stood up and she did the same. He walked over to her and looked like he didn't know if he should kiss her or not. He settled for a kiss on her cheek in the end and she was disappointed. She really wanted to kiss him. "I'm sorry. I'll call you as soon as I can."

She smiled and nodded. "I know. Bye, Steve."

She watched him leave the restaurant and asked the waiter if she could have her food to go. Back at her apartment she plopped down on her couch with her doggy bag and turned CNN on. A new deal with Iran was threatened to fall through and President Fury, Steve and the Secretary of Sate were working on it. Around midnight Fury with Steve in the background announced that they secured the deal. She was still on her couch dozing off when her phone rang. She checked the time and it was way past midnight.

"Hey?" She said sleepily.

"Oh shit! Did I wake you? I'm sorry!"

"No, it's fine. Don't worry, Steve! I watched the news, good job!"

He chuckled. "Thank you. I just wanted to...I just wanted to hear your voice and apologize again. I won't lie to you, this will probably happen more than I like. I get it if you don't want that."

"No!" She said way too loud. "I get it, it comes with the job but I wanna keep seeing you."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. Dinner and a movie at my place? I make a mean lasagna." She hoped she wasn't coming on too strong.

"I'd love that. Monday?"

"Yes, Monday is good. It's my day off."

"I know."

She had to smile to herself. "Good night, Steve." She hoped she would get her kiss on the second date.

* * *

She saw it coming but she was still surprised that the Secret Service swiped her apartment before Steve came. She got it, he was important and some people could pose a threat to him. She had the lasagna in the oven and the tiramisu in her fridge and was just finished with her make up and hair when her door bell rang. She looked one last time in the mirror and was satisfied with what she saw. She looked good in her jeans and camisole and went to her front door. Steve was smiling at her and had another bouquet of flowers for her. It was the sixth one he got her so far.

"Hi." He handed her the flowers. "You look beautiful. You always do."

"Thank you." She put the bouquet on the table next to the door and cupped his face. "I want to do this now in case you have to leave again." She pulled his head down and kissed him. He smiled against her lips and then started to kiss her back. Wow, he was an amazing kisser. His hands moved to her waist and he pressed her closer to him. Uh, this was very nice as well. She nibbled on his lower lip and she wanted to use his sigh to slip her tongue into his mouth but then the timer for the lasagna went off. Great!

They pulled apart and Steve rested his forehead against hers. "We got kinda carried away."

She chuckled. "Yeah, we did." She pecked his lips just because she could and then walked into her small kitchen to get the food out of the oven. She heard Steve's footsteps behind her.

"Wow, that smells amazing!"

She looked over her shoulder and smiled at him. She put the dish on her dinning table in the living room and lit a few candles for a romantic atmosphere. She hoped that Steve liked her lasagna. She wanted to impress him, she hadn't been that smitten with a guy in forever. While she served her food, Steve filled their glasses with wine.

"To a wonderful evening. Thank you for inviting me, Nat."

She didn't think that he had realized that he had used her nickname. "To a great date!" She clinked her glass with his and he smiled. She was already a sucker for his smile.

He took a bite from her lasagna and she watched him carefully. "Wow, it's great!"

He told her about his childhood and mentioned that he told his mother about her. That was a good sign, right? "You told your mom about me?"

Steve blushed and it was adorable. "Um, yes. She noticed that I seemed to be in a good mood and wanted to know why. But I think she already knew what or rather who the reason was."

She reached over his hand. "I'm in a really good mood too since you asked me out." They smiled at each other and finished their dinner exchanging embarrassing stories. They moved to her couch to start Charade and she immediately snuggled against his side. Steve smiled down at her and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. Every time she looked up at him he was already looking at her and she leaned up to give him a kiss. She was pleasantly surprised that they weren't interrupted tonight and finished the movie.

She walked Steve to her door and kissed him good night. "I had a great evening, Natasha."

"Me, too."

"I'll be in Europe for the next days but I'll call you, okay?"

She nodded and kissed him again. "Good night, Steve."

"Good night, Nat."

* * *

Steve cancelled two dates and left two others in the next two weeks and she knew that it wasn't his fault but she was still annoyed. She tried her best not to be too bothered by it and focused on her work. The season would be soon over and she would have a few weeks off until the next season started. She originally wanted to go on vacation and dreamed about going with Steve but she knew that would never happen. Even if he could get a few days off and he wanted to go with her, there was still the risk of them being photographed. The Washington Post already got a scoop about the VP possibly dating someone and she didn't want them to find out it was her. She didn't even know if they were in a relationship and the public knowing would just complicate things.

The head of Steve's security Rumlow was waiting in front of her dressing room after her show. "Boss likes to invite you over to dinner. I'm here to take you there if you're free, Miss Romanoff."

She hadn't seen Steve in over a week. "Yes, I'll just get changed. I'll be right back." Rumlow nodded and she got into her dressing room to get out of her costume. She felt bold and changed into lace panties and bra just in case they would have sex tonight for the first time. She threw on a pretty blouse and jeans and Rumlow escorted her to the car and drove her to Steve's house. She hadn't been here before and it looked wonderful. She thanked Rumlow for driving her and walked up the driveway to knock on Steve's door but the door opened before she could do it. Steve pulled her inside and pushed her gently against the closed door.

"Hi!" He smiled brightly and she grinned back. He kissed her before she could greet him. He kissed her until her lungs started to burn and she had to break the kiss.

"Hi." She whispered and he kissed her forehead. "I missed you."

"I missed you, too." He took her hand and gave her a quick tour of his house. It was really beautiful and so much more impressive than her little apartment. "So, I've made dinner. It's not your lasagna but I hope you like it."

As it turned out Steve was an amazing cook and made a three course meal for them. She took a bite of the tuna and licked her lips. "This wasn't in your Vanity Fair profile."

He groaned. "You read that?"

"Of course I did." She smirked and took a sip from her wine. "It was quite interesting. I got a question for you."

Steve put his fork down and leaned back in his chair. "Shoot. I'm all ears."

"Did you find your best girl?" He had said in the article that he was looking for his best girl. No one called their girlfriend that anymore but she just found it charming and yes she hoped that she could be his best girl.

"I think I did." He smiled at her and her heart was fluttering. She smiled back at him and leaned over the table to kiss him.

"Can I stay the night?"

"Are you sure?"

She nodded. "Yes. I even put on nice underwear."

Steve laughed. "If you put it like that..."

She woke up the next morning when Steve walked into his bedroom with breakfast. And of course he had new bouquet of flowers for her. She enjoyed breakfast in bed with him and then a shower with him and Rumlow drove her back to her apartment. Two hours later when she was cleaning her apartment and reminiscing about the wonderful night she had (Steve was an amazing lover) her phone basically exploded. Thinking that something had happened to Steve or at work she ran to her phone and almost dropped it when she read the texts. All of her friends were asking her why she didn't tell them that she was hooking up with the Vice President. How on earth did they know about this? She hadn't told a soul about this, not even Clint!

All the news apps on her phone sent her alerts that VP Rogers was off the market. She opened one link and saw two pictures of herself. The first one was of her at Steve's door when he opened it and the next one was of her leaving in one of Steve's button downs because he had been a bit eager and ripped the buttons of her blouse off. Fuck, those pictures left nothing to the imagination. Everyone who saw them would know that she spent the night with him. Who the fuck took them? She had to call Steve to let him know that she had nothing to do with it! She was about to hit the call button when he was calling her.

"I had nothing to do with this!"

"I know, Nat. It was Rumlow. He took the photos and sold them. He's already fired, don't worry."

"What are we supposed to do now?"

"Natasha-" He sounded serious. Oh God, was he going to end things with her? "I meant what I said about having found my best girl. I'm all in. What...What about you?"

"Me, too. Steve...I...I'm falling in love with you." She admitted quietly. "Fuck, I shouldn't have said that over the phone-"

"I love you, too!" He quickly said and she had to sit down. "I know it's fast but I never felt like this before."

"I know. Me, too." She smiled to herself.

"So if you're okay with it, I will release a statement confirming that you're my girlfriend and that I ask the media to respect our privacy."

"Okay, do that. When can I see you?" She had to see him after they put a label on their relationship and confessed their feelings.

"I try to swing by tonight." He told her again that he loved her and then had to hang up. She knew it was a dumb idea but she put the TV on and flipped through the channels. Fox News thought she was a Russian spy sent to seduce the VP (she lost her Russian citizenship when she became an American for fuck's sake!) and some daytime talk show thought that a ballerina wasn't meant to be Second Lady. That she wasn't smart enough for Steve. Fuck them! She went to Julliard for fuck's sake! She spoke three languages! She got angry and turned the TV off. Maria called and told her that tonight's performance would be cancelled because paparazzi were basically bursting through the doors. Great!

An hour later the White House released a statement confirming the relationship and asked to respect her privacy. She already knew that the media wouldn't do that because the next time she looked out of her window she saw paparazzi downstairs across the street. She quickly closed the blinds and hoped that they would somehow disappear. She loved Steve and if being with him would be like that she just had to get used to it. Two Secret Service agents knocked on her door and explained that they were sent to protect her. She thanked them and closed the door again. It was weird knowing that two agents were now in the hallway for her protection. Her whole life was about to change and she was terrified. She didn't want people to dig into her private life. She didn't want that much of attention. She just wanted to dance and be Steve's best girl.

She already knew Steve was coming because she could hear the flashlights going off and people screaming his name and asking him questions. She yanked the door open after his first knock and dragged him inside.

He immediately pulled her into a hug. "I am so sorry, sweetheart."

"It's not your fault, Steve." She buried her face in his chest.

He tightened his arms around her. "I love you, Natasha."

She looked up at him and gave him a small smile. "I love you, too. That's the only thing that matters."

"They will go after you. The media is especially harsh to women. Just ask Nick's wife."

"I know but I only care about what _you_ think of me."

He smiled and kissed her softly. "I think that you're the greatest thing that has ever happend to me."

She looked up at him through her lashes. "That answer just granted you access to my bedroom. Are those agents still out there?"

"Yes."

"Then we better be quiet." She took his head and led him to her bedroom.

A month later she accompanied Steve to a charity ball and was officially introduced as his girlfriend. Not all coverage about that evening was nice but she didn't care. She only cared about how Steve had looked at her the whole night. He had looked at her like she was his everything and later at his house he had told her that she was his everything and that was the only thing she cared about. Because he was her everything, too.


	47. Dust

**_Spoilers for IW_**

 _Steve and Natasha try to cope with the aftermath of Thanos' snapping his fingers._

* * *

They were all gone. Wanda was gone. Vision. T'challa. Sam, Sam was gone. And Bucky, his best friend, his brother was gone, too. _Steve._ He could still Bucky calling for him. Bucky had needed him and there was nothing he could have done to save him. His friends, no his family was gone. Turned into ashes, scattered around Wakanda. Everyone was gone. No, not everyone, Steve reminded himself. Thor was still here. Rhodey and Banner. And _Natasha_. She was still here. And the only reason he was still standing. He felt so numb, a part of him was still in denial, still thinking that everything was just a bad dream and he would wake up any second now.

The survivors returned to the palace where Okoye had to tell Shuri that her brother was dead. He knew he should be present when Okoye told her new queen what had happened but he just couldn't. He couldn't bare to see the girl's reaction to her brother's death. He knew how much T'challa had loved his sister. That he would be at peace with him dying instead of her. That gave Steve a little bit of comfort. That T'challa didn't die in vain.

He couldn't think about the others. Why did they have to vanish? Was it really random or did they have to die because of some grand scheme? He saw Thor talking to that raccoon and comforting him. Sam would have had a field day with a talking raccoon. Despite everything Steve had to smile a little, Sam and his jokes had always improved his mood. The last two years had been hard and he was sure that Natasha would have gone on a killing spree if it hadn't been for Sam and his jokes and ability to make everyone at ease. He didn't know if he could go on without Sam's voice of reason. _I can't believe I'm now a nanny to two reckless assholes._ Sam had complained after their first week together on the run and Natasha had just blown him a kiss.

Speaking of Natasha, where was she? He looked around the palace but couldn't find her anywhere. He started to panic, was there a second wave of people turning into dust? No, he couldn't think like that. He ran through the palace looking everywhere for her until he went to look for her in her room. And there she was standing with her back to him looking out of the windows.

He didn't think and just ran to her, turned her around and pressed her tightly against his body. "You can't just leave, Nat! I thought...I thought he took you,too..I-" He stopped because he heard her sobbing and pushed her a bit away to look at her. "Nat?"

"I checked in on the others." She closed her eyes and tears were rolling down her cheeks. "Fury and Hill don't respond. Clint did. He and Cooper are the only survivors." Her lips were trembling and he pulled her into a hug again. Oh God, he didn't even think that children would vanish as well. Sweet Lila and little Nate...And Laura... He couldn't even imagine what Clint was going through right now. Or Cooper who lost his mother and his siblings. Thanos was truly evil.

Natasha stopped crying but she didn't let go of him and he was more than grateful for that. She was the only one left. Everyone was gone, except her. She was everything he had now. His only hope, he had to be strong for her. He couldn't drown in his grief, he needed to be there for her. Somehow having Natasha in his arms gave him the strength to hope again. Maybe there was a way to undo all of this. If some ancient magic could make half the population turn into dust, maybe some ancient magic could bring them all back.

"What are we going to do now?" Natasha whispered and looked up at him. God, had she always been so small? "We have to do something. _Anything_. We can't let him get away with this."

He leaned down and pressed his lips softly against hers. They were both surprised by it but she kissed him back. "We'll find a way to save them, Nat. And if we can't do that, then we'll avenge them."

He could see how determination was forming in her eyes and she nodded. "Yes, we'll make him pay."


	48. Misunderstandings

_**For hugsforlucy.**_ I tried my best to create a love triangle because I frigging hate them so I really hope I fulfilled your prompt.

 _Natasha thinks she has all the time in the world to start something with Steve until she finds out that he's started to go on dates with Sharon._

* * *

Natasha really tried to work on herself but it wasn't the easiest to work through years of traumas and brainwashing. But she wanted to get better, she _needed_ to get better so she could deserve Steve Rogers. He deserved the world and she wanted to give it to him. He deserved a woman without baggage and she worked on losing her own. She wanted him, she wanted to be with him and she was pretty sure that he wanted her, too. But he seemed to sense that she wasn't ready (aside from her bloody past, she also had commitment issues) and he didn't pressure her. There was flirting, longing gazes and occasionally touches that lasted longer than necessary. She loved his company and realized over time that he knew her better than anyone. Even better than Clint. It scared her at first but she knew that she could trust Steve. He would never hurt her or use the intimate things he knew about her against her. She wanted to be deserving of his affection so she volunteered in a soup kitchen and went to therapy. She wanted to become the woman worthy of being Captain America's girl. Clint told her that she was insane and that if Steve didn't want her the way she was now than he didn't deserve her. He just didn't understand that it wasn't about Steve deserving her but her deserving him.

She had been going to therapy for six months now and thought that she was ready to start something with Steve. Ideally she wanted him to ask her on a date because no nice boy had ever asked her out but she figured that she had to ask him since she was the one who put their whole thing on hold. She planned to ask him after today's Avengers meeting at the tower. They all had their own floors there and while Bruce lived at the tower, the rest had apartments all over New York City. She lived in Manhattan while Steve had a place in Brooklyn that she had helped him find and decorate.

The meeting went well and she waited until the others were gone so she could ask Steve out. She had found an old cinema in Brooklyn that was perfect for their first date. She, Tony and Steve were the last ones in the conference room and she just waited for Stark to finally get lost.

"So how did your date go last night?" Tony asked Steve with a smirk on his face and her ears perked up. What? What date?! Steve was dating?! And not her?!

He looked at her briefly and then back at Tony. "It was good. Thanks for letting me borrow one of your cars."

"No problem. And to which base did you get? First, second or maybe even third?" He wiggled his eyebrows and Steve groaned.

"It was just the first date, Tony. I only took Sharon to see a movie." _Sharon._ He went out with Sharon, the woman Natasha had told him to call. Sharon who wasn't a murderer and seductress. Sharon who was tall and blonde. Sharon who was basically a Barbie. Now she had found her Ken. Sharon who was Peggy Carter's niece, Natasha personally found that connection weird but apparently that was Steve's thing. She had to get out of here before she started picturing their wedding. And kids. Sharon Carter was most definitely not sterile and could give Steve Rogers children. Sharon was the perfect girl.

She grabbed her coffee and bag and stormed out of the room. God, she was such a moron! Had she really spend the last two years thinking that there was something between her and Steve? Did she really assume that Steve had feelings for her and didn't ask her out because he knew she needed time? Unbelievable. She never thought she would be this stupid. He never asked her out or tried to kiss her because he wasn't interested in her. He was interested in _Sharon._ Sweet, kind and blonde Sharon. Maybe she had to think about a career change, she clearly lost the ability to read people. She walked home, got a bottle of vodka out and ignored the black cat who frequently showed up at her window begging to be let in. She had already let someone in and that turned out to be a huge failure on her part. She took a sip from the bottle and laughed. Had she really thought that Captain America was romantically interested in _her_?

* * *

She tried to avoid Steve as best as she could. She needed time to get over her feelings for him. She still worked on becoming a better person but not for him anymore, but for herself. She would do anything to wipe the red out of her ledger and she thought going to a therapist and volunteering at a soup kitchen would help her with that.

She was in the gym at the tower to steam of some anger. She had overheard how Darcy Lewis gushed to Dr. Foster that Steve had taken Sharon to Coney Island. Last year he had taken her to Coney Island after she confessed that she had never been there and he said that you weren't a real New Yorker until you tried every ride. And now he was taking his girlfriend on romantic dates to that place. Great. She punched the bag hard. Coney Island had been their place! She hit the punching bag harder.

She faintly heard how the door to the gym opened. "Hey, Nat." Of course of all people who worked out here, it had to be _him_. "Feels like I haven't seen you in ages. You wanna spar?"

She considered ignoring him but turned around eventually, maybe hitting the real reason for her anger and frustration would help. God, she hated how good he looked in his work out gear. Did that shirt have to show off his body so nicely?

"Sure, let's go a few rounds."

She walked over to the ring and Steve joined her a few seconds later. Without any warning she attacked him and tackled him to the ground. He was surprised but shook her off and they danced around the boxing ring, circling each other waiting for the other one to strike. He looked like he wanted to say something and before she had to hear how perfect Sharon was she lunched forward using his thigh as a boost and jumped on his shoulders. She wanted to choke him until he tapped out but he let himself fall to the ground and pinned her to the floor with her hands above her head. Shit, how did she not see that coming?

"Surprised?" Steve asked with a grin and caged her with his body. "I think this round goes definitely to me."

They were really close to each other right now. Their chest were touching and Steve was pretty much settled between her legs. She could feel the warmth radiating from his body and she caught herself wishing that they were naked doing a totally different kind of _work out._ She looked up at him and noticed that he was looking at her lips and breathing heavier than it was normal for Captain America after some training. He gazed into her eyes and she saw how his pupils were dilated and he looked back at her lips and leaned his head down. He closed his eyes and she was about to do the same thrilled for what would happen next when she remembered something. Or rather _someone_. Sharon! She pushed Steve off of her and left the ring. She walked out of the gym confused and angry at herself and ignored how Steve was calling after her. She had to get a better grip on her hormones!

Stark threw one of his many parties, this time a cocktail party to collect money for a hospital. She only came because it was for a good cause and Tony always had the good stuff from Russia. She was on her second martini when Steve walked in with Sharon on his arm. She gripped the stem of her glass harder than necessary and watched how perfect Barbie and Ken looked together. Steve wore a grey suit and Sharon a beautiful dark blue dress that showed off her shoulders. She wondered when they would appear on the cover of Vogue. They were the perfect couple.

After drowning her third martini and ending up on a first name basis with the bartender it was time to visit the bathroom. She went into one of the stalls of the ladies room and pulled her dress up when the door opened and she heard Maria's voice. She didn't let that stop her and was about to pull her panties down but stopped when she heard another voice. Sharon's.

"This is just not how I pictured it would be." Sharon said with a slightly sad voice. Was something wrong?

"What do you mean? You're dating the man everyone wants! Your boyfriend is Captain America! What more do you want?" Maria lowered her voice. "I imagine the sex must be spectacular!"

Oh God, she had to get out of her! She didn't need to hear Sharon gushing about Steve's bedroom performances! "Ha! We haven't had sex yet!" Sharon sounded bitter. "We didn't even make out yet! We had four dates and I got like two pecks on the lips so far. I try to get him to go further but he always stops me. I thought it was because he comes from a different time and wants to take things slow but I think it's because of _her_!"

"Her?" Maria asked surprised and Natasha was confused herself. Was there another woman?

"You know who! Romanoff!" Natasha's heart stopped beating for a second. "He talks about her all the time! And when we were at Coney Island and I managed to hold his hand, he immediately let go of it when a redheaded woman was in front of us! It wasn't her but I knew he thought for a second that it was Romanoff. And tonight he keeps staring at her, gripping his glass every time the bartender makes her smile."

"Then why are you still seeing him?"

"Like you said, Maria. Everyone wants him and I thought the two of us were like fated. Peggy as our connection and then I was assigned by Fury to protect him..." She sighed. "I really hoped we would be meant for each other."

"You should end things with him if he makes you unhappy, Sharon."

"Yeah, I know."

Maria and Sharon left and Natasha stared at the door of her bathroom stall. Was that really true? Were things not working between Barbie and Ken? Because of her? But why the fuck did Steve ask Sharon out when he supposedly was into her? Maybe Sharon got the whole thing wrong and Steve really wanted to take things slow. He didn't strike her as the guy who would sleep with a woman after a few dates. She waited another moment until she was sure that the coast was clear and walked out the ladies room and left the party. No matter what really was going on, she was in no mood to watch Barbie and Ken.

* * *

Fury sent her on a solo mission to take out an arms dealer in the Middle East. The mission took longer than she expected since she needed more to infiltrate his organization, but in the end the mission was a success, the arms dealer and his thugs dead and the weapons secured by SHIELD. She had been so focused on her job that she didn't even had time to think about the whole Steve and Sharon (she was sure there was a nickname in there somewhere) mess. She got home after a stop at her favorite Chinese restaurant, showered and plopped down on her couch devouring her food. She looked at her laptop on the coffee table. Maybe she should take a few days off and go somewhere, sitting on a beach drinking cocktails sounded lovely.

She was just leaning forward to grab her laptop when her door bell rang. She groaned and put her dinner down. Who was that now? She just got back, couldn't they leave her alone for at least one evening?

She looked through the peephole seeing Steve's face. What was he doing here? She thought about ignoring him but he probably heard her walking to the door with his enhanced hearing. She sighed and opened the door. "Hi?"

"Sharon broke up with me."

"Okay?" Why was he telling her that? He never even personally told her that they were together.

"Can you even break up when you were not really together in the first place..." Steve mumbled and looked at her with pink cheeks. What was going on? "I should have never asked her out in the first place. That hadn't been fair to her. My heart was never in it."

"Why are you telling _me_ this and not her?"

"Because you're the reason my heart was not in it." Now he was sporting a complete body blush. What? "I shouldn't have asked Sharon out when I wanted to ask you out. I only did it because I know that you're not interested in me and I thought I had to move on...But turns out that I can't move on." He spoke so fast that she had problems to understand everything.

"Huh?" She brilliantly replied.

"It's you, Nat. I always wished you were in Sharon's place when we went out. I know I was a dick to her and I apologized already several times. But I think you should know the truth." He took a deep breath and looked somehow more collected now. "I'm in love with you, Natasha."

Her brain stopped working. "What?"

"I love you."

"And then you start dating Sharon?" She barked at him and he took a step back looking like a lost puppy. She had been miserable in the last weeks and now he dropped this bomb on her? "I spent months working towards becoming a better person so I could ask you out and then when I'm about to do it I hear that you're dating Sharon?!"

"What?" Steve stared at her with wide eyes. "You were...You wanted to go out with me?"

Now it was her turn to blush. "Um, yeah?"

Steve started to laugh. "Here I thought you didn't like me like that and then...God, I really have no clue when it comes to women."

"I guess we're both idiots." She joined him in his laughter.

"Yeah." He said softly. "Perfect match."

She smiled at that and stepped aside. "You wanna come in?"

"I'd love to."

And as it turned out Steve was the kind of guy who slept with a woman even before the first date. But only because she was the woman he loved. And her heart was beating loudly in her chest when he took her on their first date to the old cinema she had wanted to take him to when she had planned to ask him out. And he earned himself a kiss when he told her that he didn't take Sharon to this place because he knew that it was meant for the two of them.


	49. The Bold Type (AU)

**_Inspired by the show The Bold Type. Check it out if you haven't already! It''s really great!_**

 _AU: Natasha works for a women's magazine and gets the assignment to try out the New Yorker bar scene to find out where to find men without using Tinder. She meets a great guy and spends the night with him only to find out the next day that he's the new art director for the magazine._

* * *

Natasha paid for her cab and walked into the building where the office of the magazine she worked for was. She was in a good mood today, she got a free danish with her coffee, the sun was shining and there had been no traffic on her way to work. She glanced at her reflection in the mirror of the elevator. She looked good today in her outfit. She still couldn't believe she found these Louboutins on sale. She made good money at Scarlett and had a trust fund that made it possible for her to live in a two bedroom apartment in Manhattan. Life was good. She had a great job as a writer for the most successful magazine in the country and had even greater friends. The only thing that maybe wasn't so perfect was her love life. It had been months since her and Matt broke up and she still hadn't see a man that peaked her interest but that wasn't important right now. She didn't need a man to fulfill life.

The elevator doors opened on the 29th floor and she was greeted by her co-workers and friends Wanda and Maria. Maria had started around the same time she did and Wanda joined the magazine two years ago and the three of them just clicked. She knew she could be glad that she had actual friends at her work place.

"Morning, Nat." Wanda gave her a soft smile. She worked as a stylist at Scarlett and was really good at her job. Maria recently got promoted and was now head of the social media department. She remembered how shocked Maria had been when she confessed that she wasn't on Tinder. _That's the only way to meet men!_

"Hey, you two." She smiled at her friends and followed them into the conference room for the daily pitch meeting with their editor in chief Pepper Potts who was both mentor and friend to her employees. Pepper was already there and greeted them with a smile. The rest of the team showed up shortly after and they started the meeting.

"So, I have a pitch for our love column. I know that most people today find their hookups or serious partners online but my generation-" Pepper chuckled lightly. "We found love in real life. So I want one of you to go to bars and actually flirt with guys. Go out there and meet men. Actual eye contact and shy little touches. Natasha?"

She looked up from her notebook. "Yeah?"

"You're currently single, right?"

"Yeah..." Oh, she didn't like where this was going.

Pepper smiled. "Perfect. Story is yours. Go out there and hit on hot men. Okay, that's all. Get to work."

Fuck, she didn't want to meet men. She was terrible at it. She had the worst luck and only assholes hit on her. She was still amazed that she had met Matt but then he broke up with her because of his complicated history with his ex.

Maria linked her arm with her when they walked out of the conference room. "I can't believe you get paid to meet men. Consider me jealous."

"You know I have the worst luck when it comes to men!" She groaned, already wondering what kind of assholes she would meet tonight. She wanted to do it today so she got over with it as soon as possible.

Her friend gave her a sympathetic look. "I know and that's why you'll go bar hopping in Brooklyn! I hear it's full of great men!" Maria grinned. "My friend Jane met a beefcake named Thor at a Norwegian restaurant. She's totally smitten with him and claims that all the great men live in Brooklyn."

"Okay..." She thought about going to Brooklyn for her assignment. The chance that she would run into someone she knew was pretty slim and that way she could research her piece without blowing her cover. There was no way she would tell the men that she was going to write an article about them. She spent the day editing another article for the political column and left in the afternoon to get ready for her night out. She'd rather stay at home watching Netflix or have some drinks with her girls but she didn't want to disappoint Pepper. She got home, took a long shower, went through a long beauty routine and chose leather pants that made her ass look good and a top that showed off her boobs in a classy way. She had to look good to attract some guys or she could forget the article.

She took a cab to Brooklyn and went to the first bar and walked right back out when she saw the people. It was full of business men who looked like they were auditioning for American Psycho. What the fuck were they doing in Brooklyn? She thought those guys never set a foot on the bridge. She looked through the windows of the next bar and decided that it was worth a try. The bar looked nice and she didn't think it was the kinda place for future serial killers to hang out. She stepped inside and the people here looked like normal people enjoying their night.

A few attractive men were here and her stomach twisted in knots when she thought that she would have to flirt with them. She went straight to the bar and ordered a gin tonic. From experience she knew that it wouldn't take long until a guy would hit on her. Hopefully he wasn't an asshole. She took her drink with a thanks and looked around. A few groups were here and two men at a table were looking over to her. Well, one man was. He was really good looking. He seemed tall with dark hair and if she had to guess she'd say that he had blue or grey eyes. He smiled at her and raised his glass. She nodded and raised hers as well. The guy was saying something to his friend and he looked over to her. Holy fuck! He wasn't just handsome, he was beautiful! He had longer blond hair to his ears, a look she usually didn't like but this man pulled it of really well and he had a beard that gave him a rough and sexy look. His eyes appeared to be blue and as far as she could tell he was very muscular under that black leather jacket. Holy shit, why did no one ever tell her before that men like that were running around Brooklyn? But a man that attractive had to be an ass. What did her mother always say? _Beautiful men are always jerks because they never had to be nice._

She sighed to herself, if her mother was right than that man was a major asshole. He truly had to be the most beautiful man she'd ever seen. He was still looking at her and gave her a shy smile. She was so enamored by it that she gave him a bright one in return. _Please, don't let him be another asshole!_ His friend got up and walked over to her. Damn, she had set her eyes on Mister Gorgeous.

"Hi." He gave her a charming smile. "I'm James and the guy over there who's probably blushing by now is my best friend Steve. Do you want to join us?"

So his name was Steve? All the Steves she knew were over fifty and married with 2.5 children and wearing socks in sandals. "Yes, I'd love to. I'm Natasha, by the way." She offered him her hand and James shook it. He was really handsome and definitely her type but Steve...He was a completely different league. God had a really good day when he made Steve. She took her drink and followed James to their table. Steve stood up and pulled the chair out for her. Oh, he had manners. That was already a good sign.

"I'm Steve. Nice to meet you." Oh boy, his voice sounded incredible. She had a thing for deep male voices. He seemed a bit embarrassed about the whole thing and she got the feeling that he wasn't very confident when it came to women. Weird, with that face and body, the women had to be lining up for him.

"Hey. I'm Natasha. Nice to meet you, too." She smiled at him and thanked him for helping her into her chair. They did small talk and she didn't even notice that James left the table because she was so focused on her conversation with Steve. They talked about God and the world and he seemed like a really decent guy with a dry humor that turned her more on than it should and she thought it was safe to say that they were flirting. They were laughing together and leaning towards each other, touching the other one from time to time. They really hit it off. She was not only attracted to his looks but to his personality as well. He was the whole package and she wanted him. The finger brushing and knees touching set her body on fire and she was turned on beyond belief which surprised her. It usually took her some time until she was sexual attracted to someone but Steve...She wanted to climb that man like a tree.

"Do you want to get out of here?" She whispered and placed her hand on his thigh to show her intentions.

His eyes widen for a second but his pupils were dilated and she knew he wanted her too. "Are you sure?"

She nodded. "Yes, 100 percent."

He smiled and rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand. "Great. I'll just tell Bucky we're leaving." He blushed a little. "I've never done something like this before."

That made her relieved and she didn't think he was lying about that. "Me neither."

He nodded and got up to say goodbye to his friend. James was grinning at her and she rolled her eyes grabbing her clutch. Steve came back to her and took her hand leading her out of the bar. They walked a few meters and then he stopped and cupped her face with his big hands. Even in heels he was so much taller than her.

"Can I kiss you, Natasha?"

She nodded smiling and he pressed his lips softly against hers. The kiss grew deeper and hotter by the second until someone yelled that they should get a room. They both laughed and walked hand in hand to his apartment that wasn't that far away from the bar. He asked her again if she was sure when they reached his building. She liked that about him, he really was a sweet guy. She kissed him as her answer and led him by his hand to the door. They pretty much started making out as soon as the elevator doors closed and then stumbled through the hallway to his apartment. She couldn't remember a time where she wanted someone more than she wanted Steve right now. She really hit the jackpot with him, Steve was a gentle yet rough lover and she could honestly say that night was the best sex of her life. He really knew how to treat a lady and had no problem to bury his face between her legs.

She woke up the next morning very early watching Steve with a grin on her face, then collected her clothes that were scattered around his place (when did he threw her bra on the ceiling lamp?) and left her phone number and a kiss in red lipstick on his bathroom mirror. She really hoped that he would call her. She would have loved to stay longer, maybe for breakfast and/or morning sex but she had to head back to Manhattan to get ready for work.

* * *

Maria was already in the elevator when she came to work. The doors closed and she leaned over to her and seemed to sniff her. What the fuck? "Did you just sniff me?"

"You had sex last night!"

"What are you, a sex bloodhound?" How did Maria know? She had been pretty sweaty after last night because boy they've had a lot of sex (she didn't think she had that much sex in one night before) but she took a shower when she had gotten home so there was no way that she was still smelling like sex.

"So you did have sex last night." Maria grinned and pointed at her chest. "No, I'm not a sex bloodhound but your button popped open and I can see a hickey on your right breast. Nice bra by the way, La Perla?"

She looked down and quickly buttoned her blouse up. Jesus, how many people did she show her cleavage on her way to work? Maria was still grinning and Natasha decided to ignore her.

"I take it thatyour night out in Brooklyn was a success?"

She rolled her eyes and got her phone out of her bag and her heart started hammering against her rib cage when she saw that she had a text from an unknown number.

 _I would have loved to wake up with you. Last night was...amazing. I really wanna see you again, take you on a date. What do you say? -Steve._

She smiled to herself and saved his number in her contacts.

 _I'll definitely say yes to that! I really enjoyed last night as well. It was great. You were great...:)_

"That your hookup?"

"Shut up!" She smirked at Maria and followed her out of the elevator into the conference room for the daily meeting. Huh, Pepper wasn't here yet. She was usually always the first one here to make the other ones look bad. She was looking at her phone at the table waiting for Steve's text when Maria suddenly gasped.

" _Fuck me_!" She muttered under her breath and Natasha looked up to see what made Maria behave like that. Her eyes were almost falling out of their sockets because besides Pepper someone else was walking into the room. Steve! What the fuck was he doing here?

"Morning, everyone. I'm very pleased to introduce you to our new art director Steve Rogers. I hope you'll give him a warm welcome!"

Fuck me, indeed. She had sex with a co-worker last night! Steve's eyes met hers and he looked equally shocked. Oh God, what was she supposed to do now?! She had known that the new art director was named Rogers but how earth should she have known that it was the Steve Rogers she had mind blowing sex with last night.

"Are you okay?" Maria leaned closer and whispered to her. "God, that man is very woman's wet dream. He's like sex personalized."

"Just got a hangover." She lied and Wanda was also giving her a funny look. Steve introduced himself quickly and said that he looked forward to working with them. They were dismissed and she practically ran to her desk trying to calm herself. God, why did the one great guy she met have to work with her? Starting something with a co-worker who was also above her was so unprofessional and she already knew that people would gossip about her if they knew. They would say that she got special treatment because Steve was banging her. She had worked so hard to get this job, a job that let her write light and funny pieces but also write articles with important messages. She loved her job, she loved working at Scarlett...She couldn't start anything with Steve, even though he was funny and smart and the best sex she'd ever had.

Her phone buzzed with a text. From Steve.

 _Can we talk somewhere in private? During lunch? My treat?_

She sighed and typed a reply.

 _I don't think this is a good idea. Both the lunch and this thing between us. We should keep it professional._

She could see that Steve was typing for quite some time but then his answer was only one word.

 _Okay._

She started to work on her article about meeting men in real life but got distracted because she always looked up from her screen to see if Steve was close by but he wasn't. And it didn't help that every time she closed her eyes memories of last night were flashing through her mind. She shook her head and focused back on her open document. Great she misspelled four different words, she corrected them and Maria was suddenly standing behind her. "Fashion closet now!"

She got up thinking that her friend had some kind of emergency and needed her help. Wanda was already in the closet waiting for them.

"Okay, how hot is the new guy?" Maria asked with a grin and Wanda nodded in agreement. Seriously, that's what this was about?

"He's very handsome." Wanda added. "Do you think he has a girlfriend? Or boyfriend? Guys like him are never single."

Natasha bit her lip to not tell them that Steve hadn't had a relationship in over two years. Wanda and Maria continued to gush over Steve wondering how he would look without his clothes and if _everything_ was big on him and she stared at the clothes in the closet. She had answers to all those questions. He looked incredible naked like a sculpture made by Michelangelo himself and yes his junk had been very impressive.

"Hey, Nat, you okay? You've been all weird since the meeting." Maria looked at Wanda. "Our girl had an one-night stand last night."

Well, she hadn't want it to be an one-night stand but now it had to be an one time thing. Wanda smiled at her. "That's great. Good for you that you're putting yourself out there."

Should she tell Wanda and Maria that it was Steve who she'd had sex with last night? No, it was probably for the best if no one knew about it. She told her friends that she wasn't feeling so well and that she would work from home today. She grabbed her laptop and bag and left the office to get home.

* * *

Fortuna was kind to her and she didn't see Steve in the next days and he seemed to respect her request not to continue this thing between them because he stopped texting her. She was sad about it because she was convinced that something great could have happened between them but it was better this way. He was topic no.1 in the office and pretty much everyone was lusting after him, a few women had hit on him and she was very pleased when she heard that he turned them down. Apparently not everyone at Scarlett was worried about their professional reputation.

She was the last one in the office and it was late at night but she liked it when she was alone here and could work on her article in peace. She wanted to print it so she could edit it but the printer ran out of ink. She groaned and walked to the supply closet to get new ink. She was halfway in a storage box looking for pink ink when the door opened and someone came it. With the print cartridge in her hand she crawled out of the box and turned around only to see Steve behind her.

"Um, hi."

"Hi." She hadn't seen him since his first day and boy did he look good today with his sleeves rolled up and his hair a bit tousled.

"I thought I was the only left here." He mumbled out and held a box of pencils up. "I needed new ones."

"Yeah..." She was busy starring into his blue eyes. He really had the prettiest eyes she'd ever seen. He met her gaze and licked his lips. Why was is so hot in here? Didn't the AC work? She didn't know who went first for the kiss, maybe he did or maybe she did but they both tossed their things aside and crashed their lips together. The kiss made her knees weak and it was good that Steve lifted her up and pushed her against the wall next to her. They were both drowning in each other and in no time her skirt was pushed up and his pants pulled down and they had sex in the supply closet. At least they didn't do it on the copier.

She panted into his neck after she came down from her high and Steve kissed her temple softly and let her carefully down after he slipped out of her and cleaned her up with one of the stocked paper rolls.

"Do you want to get dinner? I'm sure a few places are still open." He smiled at her sweetly and she wanted to say yes so badly.

"I...I don't think that's a good idea, Steve." His smile vanished and she felt like an asshole. "We're co-workers. I don't wanna be the office slut."

"What? I've never...I would never call you that! I want to spend time with you. I want to get to know everything about you. There is something between us, don't you agree?"

"It doesn't matter. We work together, we can't start something." No matter how much she wanted it, she worked so hard for her career and reputation. "It's different for women. I'm sorry, Steve." She kissed his cheek. "That doesn't mean I don't like you. I really do." She picked the print cartridge from the floor up and left the supply closet ignoring how he was calling after her. She couldn't just risk everything for a guy she just met. And how could she have been so stupid to have sex with him again at her fucking workplace! She was just glad that there were no security cams in the supply closet.

* * *

She was proud of herself that she managed to avoid Steve in the next to weeks completely and didn't answer her phone the two times he called her. She knew she was acting like a child but she apparently couldn't trust herself around him and more sex would lead to more heartbreak. She was already mad enough at herself that she couldn't stop thinking about Steve.

Scarlett threw a rooftop party for its employees and everyone including Steve was there. They all sat along a giant table to enjoy a terrific dinner and every time she looked into his direction he was already looking at her.

"Did you notice that Rogers is gazing at you longingly?" Wanda whispered to her over desert. "He's been looking at you all evening. Did something happen between you two?"

"No." She shoved a spoon full or tiramisu into her mouth. Wanda raised an eyebrow at her but didn't say anything. Natasha spent the rest of the party watching countless women hitting on Steve. It didn't help her ego that real models were here and really interested in him. He talked to them but she didn't know if he was flirting with them. She gritted her teeth and swallowed her jealousy down, she had no reason to be jealous. She was the one who turned him down, he could do what- and whoever he wanted. As soon as it was an acceptable time to leave she said goodbye to her friends and left the rooftop. She didn't need to keep watching how women were flocking around Steve.

She just hailed a cab when someone was tipping on her shoulder. It was Steve. "You okay?"

A cab stopped and she dragged Steve into it. She gave the driver her address and Steve watched her with big eyes but made no sign that he wanted to leave and the cab drove off. She paid the driver before Steve could and he followed her up to her apartment.

"What am I doing here?" He broke the silence when they were in her hallway.

"I...I don't know. I didn't want anymore women hitting on you." She admitted with a blush. "Sorry, that I kidnapped you."

Steve grinned. "I think I'm a bit too old to get kidnapped. So you were jealous, huh?"

"Maybe."

"Look, I did some research. As long as we go to HR and sign a few papers, we can date."

"I know that."

"You do?"

"I know that Scarlett lets co-workers date but I don't want my personal life to interfere with my private life."

"Aren't you friends with Hill and Maximoff?"

"I'm not sleeping with them." She sighed and leaned against the wall. "Look, people always have a certain opinion of me because of how I look. They're surprised when I tell them that I went to an Ivy League college or that I have actually opinions about things. They will always think that I'll get preferences because of you. Because you're my superior and I'm sleeping with you. It's different for women. You'll get a clap on the shoulder and I will be called a slut."

"I didn't think about it like that. Fuck, I really wanna be with you...Do you wanna keep it a secret? I mean it's not like we're actually working together so-"

"I don't know...I hate secrets."

"Me, too." He ran a hand over his face. "Do you want me to leave?"

"No, even though you probably should. Do you want a drink?"

He nodded and followed her into her living room. They spent the whole night talking to each other about anything except work and she realized with a shock after he left the next morning that she was about to fall in love with him. What was more important? Her reputation or her happiness? He once again made it clear that he wanted to be with her before he left but he also said that he understood her hesitation. Fuck, what was she supposed to do?

She spent the whole day thinking about her job, life and Steve and a made pro and con list for or against a relationship with him. She ripped the paper apart and took the subway to Brooklyn. Sometimes a list wasn't what one needed to make a decision. He opened the door after her second knock.

"Do you want to go to HR with me on Monday?"

Steve smiled. "Are you sure?"

"Yes." She nodded and placed her hands on his chest. "I am. I want this. I want you. I want you and me to be an _us_."

His smile grew wider and he leaned down to kiss softly her. "I want that, too." He whispered against her lips and let her into his apartment.


	50. The Bold Type II (AU)

_Second part of the Bold Type_

* * *

She spent the weekend in Brooklyn with Steve exploring the borough and celebrating their new relationship with a nice dinners and even greater sex later at his place. She didn't know what it was exactly but it seemed like their bodies were made for each other. Everything was still new and exciting and yet they touched each other like they knew each other for years.

They talked with Pepper after the daily meeting in private to inform her about their relationship and she seemed happy for them. They had to talk separately to HR, and she was kind of uncomfortable with all the things they wanted to know even though they assured her that it was confidential and wouldn't leave this room and then had to sign a few papers and at least to the to company they were an official item. She still asked Steve to keep their relationship quiet for the mean time, she didn't want the gossip to start right away.

She went back to her desk and five minutes later Maria showed up. "Where were you all morning?"

"I had to deal with some legal stuff."

"Are you getting sued?"

"Ha, no." She shook her head. "Don't worry, it's nothing bad."

"You wanna get some drinks after work? Wanda already said yes."

Her and Steve wanted to cook tonight and watch movies at her place. She already emptied a drawer this morning so he could leave some of his stuff at her place and didn't need to bring an over-night bag every time he stayed over. She did wonder if they were moving too fast but she never felt this way before.

"I already have plans, sorry."

"With whom?"

"I met someone." She answered truthfully. "But it's still new."

Maria's eyes lit up. "That's great! Can't wait for all the juicy details and to meet this new guy!" She left and Natasha got to work to finish her article about meeting men in real life. She had told Steve yesterday about the piece and that it had been the reason why she had been in Brooklyn and she had been worried that he would get mad but he hadn't been and then admitted that he had read every piece she had every written. She had been so touched that she had dragged him back to his couch to show him her gratitude.

* * *

The next few weeks with Steve were like heaven, they didn't really see each other work (which was good) and spent the evenings and weekends together. Steve showed her all his favorite places in Brooklyn and she had to admit that she really liked this part of New York City. She got to know James better and met Steve's other best friend Sam. They both were really nice and didn't hold back on sharing embarrassing stories about Steve who blushed furiously and told his friends to stop.

Steve turned out to be the perfect gentleman when she mentioned that her feet hurt from her stilettos and offered her a piggyback ride home. She pressed a kiss to his neck. "Thank you."

"You don't really deserve this after laughing so much about me." He pouted and walked with her up the stairs to his apartment. She licked his neck and he groaned. "Stop that or I'll drop you."

She laughed softly and kissed his neck again. "I like your friends. They really love you."

Steve unlocked his front door and walked into the apartment. "Yeah, they especially show their love when they tell my girlfriend every embarrassing thing that ever happened to me."

Her heart was fluttering in her chest. _Girlfriend._ She loved it when he called her that. "Oh poor baby. Want me to make you feel better?" She slipped her hand into his button down.

He didn't let her down and walked straight with her into the bedroom. "Yeah? What do you have in mind?" He dropped her softly onto his bed.

"Strip, Captain, and I'll show you." Ever since he told her that he had been in the Army and was a Captain, she had started to call him Captain in bed and he really seemed to be into it. He put a little show on and soon joined her in bed where she did her best to make him feel better. And she was succeeding judging by the sounds he made.

* * *

She still hadn't told Wanda and Maria that her new mystery man was Steve which made Maria lusting after him extremely uncomfortable but she wasn't ready for the office gossip yet. She trusted her friends but she knew that it was only a matter of time until the entire magazine knew that she was sleeping with the art director. She could tell that Steve wanted to get to know her friends and she introduced him to her oldest friend Clint. They hit it right off and Clint told her later that he was happy that she finally found one of the good guys.

It was a hot friday summer night and they were sitting on her tiny balcony drinking beer and listening to the sounds of a New Yorker night. She was on his lap with her back to his chest and he was drawing circles on her naked thigh after he had pushed her dress up. She leaned her head on his shoulder and looked up at him.

"Steve?"

"Mm?" His hand slipped between her thighs and brushed her skin there softly.

She had to tell him how she was feeling. She never felt this way before but she knew what it was and he needed to know. Even if his feelings weren't the same. "I'm in love with you."

He stopped caressing her skin and smiled at her softly. "Yeah?" He titled her head and gave her a deep and long kiss that made her crave for more. "That's good because I love you,too."

The butterflies were dancing tango in her stomach and she was surprised her heart didn't jump out of her chest. No man had ever told her before that he loved her. "You do?"

He kissed her again. "Yes. I think I fell for you when I first saw you."

She turned around and straddled his waist. "I think I did too." Steve smiled brightly at her and kissed her again and they were both far too gone to move this back into her apartment and ended up making love on her balcony. She really hoped no one saw them but they did cover their lower bodies with a blanket. So even if someone did see them, they didn't see anything explicit.

* * *

Natasha couldn't believe her luck when Pepper told her on Monday morning that she would be the one to fly to Paris Fashion Week to cover it. She had never been there and would get to see every show. And it was even better that Steve would go with her as well in his job as art director. Maybe they would have some free time to explore the city together. What was more romantic than spending a summer week in Paris with your boyfriend after you told him that you loved him? Steve sent her a text after the daily meeting that he couldn't wait to go to Paris with her and that he already knew a very romantic restaurant he wanted to take her to. She smiled to herself, sent him a kissing emoji and went to the kitchen to make herself a coffee before she would get to work. She had to finish all her current pieces before Paris.

"I'm telling you that _he_ suggested her! Probably so he can fuck her internationally!" Christine Everhart, the gossip reporter of the magazine, said in a fake-whisper to someone. She stopped around the corner, her heart pounding in her chest. Who was she talking about? About _her_?

"You sure they're a thing?" Sharon Carter asked back.

"Yeah. I saw them this Friday! Fucking on her balcony! My boyfriend lives in the complex across hers. They were covered by a blanket but believe me I could tell that she was riding him!"

Fuck! She really was talking about her and Steve! And she saw them having sex! Oh, God! And of course that bitch thought that Steve was the reason she would go to Paris and not the fact that she had worked her ass off for Scarlett for years!

"Natasha is really good at what she's doing. Pepper chose her because she earned it." Sharon defended her and she was grateful for that. What was she supposed to do? Run away? No, she wouldn't give in to that bitch Christine. She straightened her shoulders and walked around the corner.

"Good morning!" She greeted them cheerfully and she could see that Christine was wondering if she had heard them. "I hope you have a wonderful day. I know I do." She filled her mug with coffee and saw how Sharon and Christine were starring at her. She smiled sweetly at Christine. "I hope your boyfriend likes our neighborhood." She took her mug and left the kitchen.

"That's what you get for being a fucking gossip." Sharon hissed before Natasha was out of earshot.

She should have known that Christine wouldn't feel bad about getting caught and the fact that she had seen them having sex was spreading like wildfire through the office. She knew that Maria knew when she dragged her by her arm into the fashion closet where Wanda was already waiting for them.

"How can you let me say this dirty stuff about Rogers in your presence when you're seeing him?" Maria asked her with wide eyes and smacked her arm. "I told you how I would ravish him."

"In my defense it was quite amusing and I might have used a few of your ideas on him." She said with a smirk but then dropped it. "So, everyone knows now, huh?"

Wanda nodded. "Yeah, I think so."

"I didn't get Paris because of him!"

"We know that, Nat." Maria assured her and Wanda nodded again. "We know how great you are at your job. Everyone knows that here despite that bitch's claims. Don't worry, I saw how Christine walked into Pepper's office. She'll set her straight."

The door opened and Steve was standing in the door frame. "Oh, I only saw you walking in. I'll leave you-"

"Nonsense." Wanda said and grabbed Maria's hand. "We were just leaving. We should all have drinks sometime." She smiled at Steve and then dragged Maria out of the closet and closed the door behind her.

"I've never been in here before." He said and walked over to her. "I'm so sorry about what happened." He hugged her and kissed the top of her head. "I wouldn't have ripped your panties if I had known that someone was watching."

"Steve, we both wanted to have sex. It's not your fault. I'm pretty sure Christine was not the only one who saw us." She looked up at him. "So, the cat's out of the bag."

"I'm sorry they say this shit about you only getting the Paris job because of me."

"Yeah...I did tell you that would happen."

"Yeah." Steve sighed and kissed the top of her head again. "It still sucks. You are such a great writer."

"I just have to ignore the gossip until the next juicy thing happens and no one cares about us anymore." She really hoped she was right about that.

Steve nodded and kissed her softly. "Yeah. You are amazing and I love you."

"I love you, too."

Some were looking at her differently but she had the suspicion that those women were mostly jealous that she was the one dating Steve and not them. Wanda and Maria were getting along with Steve and she didn't miss how they were some sparks between her girls and Steve's friends when they all went out for drinks.

Paris was incredible and she couldn't wait to go with her boyfriend on a real vacation. And she was incredibly pleased when Christine Everheart was fired because she was stealing stuff from the fashion closet. That was the new big thing now and no one cared about her and Steve anymore.


	51. Wedding bells

I actually had this one shot planned as the 50th chapter but I totally didn't notice that the last one was already the 50th. Ops! Anyway here it is

 _The day is finally here -Steve and Natasha are getting married._

* * *

She thought it was just a stupid tradition and would have no impact on their marriage but Steve insisted to spend the last night before their wedding separated so she woke up alone in her big hotel bed. Today was the day of their wedding! She was going to be Steve Rogers' wife in a few hours! Oh God! Now she was actually kind of glad that she was alone because she was beaming and giggling like a school girl. She pulled the sheets over her face and giggled even more. She was getting married! To _Steve_! The love of her life.

She got out of bed after she had her facial expressions back under control and slid her engagement ring back on. She usually slept without it since the diamond was pretty big and she didn't want to hurt herself or Steve during the night. She put her silk kimono on and walked out of the bedroom into the joining living room of her hotel suite and smiled. The table was set and covered in rose petals. So Steve had been here after all, there was no way that he would have let someone of the staff do this. She picked the card out of the bouquet and she was right.

 _I can't wait to be your husband, doll._

She smiled even brighter and smelled the flowers. She enjoyed her breakfast in peace and to her surprise she wasn't nervous or getting cold feet. No, she was just excited to get married. She looked at the clock, in four hours she would be Mrs. Rogers. She had asked Steve only a few days after he proposed if he would okay with her taking his name. Marrying Steve meant the start of a new life, becoming a new person, a better person and she wanted to do that with his name. She didn't want to be Natasha Romanoff anymore, she wanted to be Natasha Rogers. Steve had kissed her with tears in his eyes and told her that it was her decision but she could tell that he was happy that she wanted to take his name. They would be a family soon, they should have the same name.

A knock on her door interrupted her thoughts and she opened it knowing it would be her bridesmaids with her wedding gown and it had taken her months until she found the perfect one. She let Pepper, Laura and Wanda in who where already dressed up.

"How's the bride feeling?" Laura asked her after a kiss on her cheek. "Cold feet?"

"Surprisingly no. I just want to get married."

Wanda smiled at her brightly. "I think that can be arranged." She laughed a little. "I walked by Steve's room earlier and his emotions are overflowing. It takes all of his willpower not to just run to your room with Fury in tow so he can get you two married."

Natasha laughed. That was so Steve and she kind of liked the idea. Pepper raised her finger at her like she could read her mind. "No one's getting married until we get you into this dress!"

Wanda and Laura nodded laughing and her three friends got to work. They tied her into her white lace corset (she couldn't wait to see Steve's face when he would see her in it) and did her hair and make up. Wanda styled her hair into a chignon and Pepper pinned beautiful diamond hair pins in place. Laura did her make up and made sure it keep it light, to highlight her eyes and to use waterproof mascara. She didn't want to look like Bucky in his Winter Soldier days when she exchanged her vows with Steve.

"Beautiful!" Pepper clapped into her hands. "And now, the dress!"

It was a bit of teamwork and she would definitely need Steve's help to get out of it but she didn't think he would mind. She slid her high heels on and looked into the mirror. She really looked beautiful. Her dress was perfect and she already knew that Steve would love it. She chose a strapless mermaid gown made out of silk. It was simple without any pearls, lace or stones but she wanted it that way and it really clung nicely to her figure.

"You look amazing, Nat." Wanda complimented her and helped her put her diamond bracelet on that Steve had given her for their first anniversary. "Steve's gonna love it!"

"Thank you."

Pepper and Laura seemed equally smitten with her look and Lila basically freaked out when she saw her and told her that she looked like a queen. Wearing a wedding dress was really nice for a woman's ego.

She walked down the stairs of the hotel and was again so grateful to Tony and Pepper that they had rented out the entire hotel in Venice so that she and Steve could have a private wedding. No tabloid knew they were here and she would never forget the look on Tony's face when they told him why they had chosen Venice to get married. This was were they had gotten together during a mission and slept with each other for the first time. _You really could have left out the last part of that story, Romanoff!_

Clint was waiting for her in the foyer and whistled when she came into his view. "Wow, Tasha. Lila's right. You really look like a queen."

"Thanks Barton, but I'm already spoken for." She joked and took his offered arm.

Clint laughed and squeezed her hand. "You look very beautiful. Steve's one lucky man."

"I'm the lucky one, believe me."

She walked with Clint through the foyer to the ballroom where the ceremony would take place. All their friends and family were here and it wasn't a lot of people but everyone they loved was here.

The music started and the double-winged door opened. Everyone rose up from their seats and Steve was already beaming brightly at her. James was whispering something in his ear but Steve never broke eye contact with her. She knew she would never forget the way he was looking at her right now. He looked at her like she was the best thing that could have happened to him. He had never looked happier. She was already smiling so much that her cheeks started to hurt and she was sure that the pain would be only getting worse but she didn't care. Clint walked her down the aisle that was decorated with flowers and candles and she had to remind herself to walk slowly and not to run into her groom's arms.

They finally reached Steve and Clint placed her hand in Steve's. "She's your problem now, good luck!" Everyone laughed and she was about to kick him with the heel of her shoe but he kept talking. "Take good care of her. She's very special."

Steve smiled and looked only at her. "I know. I will."

Clint left and she gave Laura her bouquet so she had both of her hands free. "Hi." She whispered softly, overwhelmed with her love for him. She would have never imagined that she would have been capable to love someone that much but here she was being utterly and completely in love with Steve Rogers, waiting to be finally his wife.

"Hi." He whispered back, his voice full of emotion. "You look...Wow, just wow." He bit his lip and she actually giggled in front of everyone. Fuck!

"I heard that!" Tony yelled and she didn't have to turn around to know that Pepper was throwing her husband a death glare. "Sorry!" Tony fake-whispered.

"You two are done?" Fury asked amused. "Can we start the ceremony?" She and Steve didn't break eye contact but nodded. "Okay, good. We are gathered here today to celebrate Natasha and Steve's love. To witness them join each other in holy matrimony. I've seen them both come a long way and while it wasn't really my intention that these two would fall for each other when I partnered them up-" She remembered how Fury had dropped his coffee mug when he had walked in on her and Steve making out in the facility's common kitchen."But even I have to admit that these two here are the perfect match." Steve smiled brightly and nodded. "Two people made for each other. So I take it that you two have written your own vows?"

"Yes." She whispered and the spoke louder. "Steve, truth to be told if someone would have told me that I would fall madly in love with Captain America I would have laughed and sent them to the next hospital. And I didn't fall in love with Captain America. I fell madly in love with Steve Rogers from Brooklyn. I fell in love with your heart and your kindness. The way you see the world and people. That you are the opposite of me, that you complete me. I didn't believe in love and fairy tales until you. You are my happy ending and I love you so much. I always will."

Steve had tears in his eyes and leaned forward to kiss her. "Nah, you're not married yet!" Fury barked and Steve leaned back with a sheepish smile on his face.

"Natasha, after I woke up from the ice...Nothing made sense. I hated it here. I hated every goddamn minute here but you showed me how to live in this world. To actually enjoy my new life. You didn't let me drown in self pity, you guided me to find my own way. And you help me realize something. There was a reason why I had to sleep for seventy years. You are that reason. I had to wait for you and I would do it again. You are my soulmate and we are meant to be. I will always love you. Always."

"Natasha, do you take Steve to be your wedded husband, to live together in marriage? Do you promise to love him, comfort him, honor and keep him for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, and forsaking all others, be faithful only to him, for as long as you both shall live?"

"I do."

"Steve, do you take Natasha to be your wedded wife, to live together in marriage? Do you promise to love her, comfort her, honor and keep her for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, and forsaking all others, be faithful only to her, for as long as you both shall live? "

"I do."

She tried to blink her tears away and squeezed his hands. Laura gave her Steve's wedding ring and she took Steve's left hand. "With this ring, I marry you. With my loving heart. With my willing body. And with my eternal soul." She slid the ring on his finger.

Steve kissed her left hand after James gave him her wedding ring. "With this ring, I marry you. With my loving heart. With my willing body. And with my eternal soul." He slipped the ring on her finger and kissed it.

" I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride, Rogers."

Steve gently cupped her face and kissed her softly at first and then dipped her deepening the kiss. Their friends were whistling and clapping but she barely noticed it. All she could think about was that she was his wife. And he was her husband. _Finally._


	52. Boys night

_**For Rachel3003. I don't think this turned out the way you had it mind but I hope you still like it.**_

 _Sequel to Girls night. Steve meets the guys for a boys night and Tony has a surprise in store that makes Steve very uncomfortable._

* * *

Steve entered the lobby of Tony's penthouse where Rhodey, Sam and Bucky were already waiting for him with drinks in their hands. Tony had them all invited over for a _boys night_ saying that they had to have one after the women had a girls night. He wasn't really in the mood for Tony's shenanigans but he couldn't cancel, not when he had been the one insisting that Natasha should go to the girls night to have some fun. He'd really rather wanted to stay home, especially after Nat whispered huskily into his ear what she would do to him when he got back but he put the clothes on that she had picked out for him and drove to the tower trying not think about the fact that Natasha was currently laying in his bed and that he had seen a little bag from the lingerie shop Natasha frequently shopped at. He really wondered what she had bought. Maybe new stockings? Or a new teddy? He really liked the black lace ones.

"Punk?" Bucky looked at him slightly annoyed. "You want a bourbon, yes or no?"

"Um, sure." He walked over the bar and took the drink Bucky offered him.

"What got you so deep in thought?"

"Nothing." He said quickly. Natasha had said that she wanted to tell the others about them but he wanted her to do that on her own terms. He knew that it was a big step for her and he didn't want to announce their relationship without her being present.

Tony walked over to them. "Glad everyone's here now. What took you so long, Cap? You're usually the first one."

There was no way that he would tell Tony that he had been late because he had made out with Natasha against the wall next to his front door. She had just wanted to give him a peck as goodbye and then things _escalated_ a bit. He had started to unbutton her blouse but she had pushed him away laughing and then told him again what she would do later to him. He really, really didn't want to leave after that. "Traffic."

Tony nodded. "Okay, boys. Finish your drinks. Uncle Tony has a surprise for you!" He looked at Steve. "I think you will be especially thankful." What the fuck was that supposed to mean?

"Don't call yourself Uncle Tony." Rhodey said and gulped his drink down.

"Hey, at least I didn't call myself Daddy!"

Happy drove them to what looked like a night club and Steve already felt uncomfortable. He didn't like clubbing, he had went with Nat to one when they had been in Shanghai on a mission and everything had been too much and they had to leave.

"You wanna go clubbing, Tony?" Rhodey asked incredulously. "I think I'm too old for that."

"We're not the ones who are gonna dance." Tony replied with a wink and Sam's whole face lit up.

"No way, man!"

Steve still had no clue where they were but he was at least relieved that it wasn't a club. They got out of the car and Happy looked really sad that he wasn't coming with them. They stepped inside and he wanted to leave immediately. Tony had brought them to a fucking _strip club_! A fancy one but it was still a strip club. He had a girl at home waiting for him, this was no place where a taken man should be! Was he already cheating on Nat by just being here? He looked up the stage and a woman just got rid of her bra. He immediately looked away. Fuck, did he just cheat? The only woman he wanted to see naked was his girl!

"Best idea you ever had, Stark!" Bucky grinned, looking at the stage.

"I _am_ a genius." Tony smirked and then looked at him. "I thought it was time that Spangles finally saw a naked woman!"

He had seen a naked woman just this morning in his shower and he did more than just look at her! He kept his mouth shut and clenched his jaw. Tony thinking he was a virgin had been amusing since he had lost his virginity months ago to Natasha but this was just taking it too far. "What the fuck, Stark!"

Bucky clapped his shoulder. "Lighten up, punk. Let's get you a lap dance!"

"No!" He yelled. He was sure that was definitely cheating on Nat because she had giving him one more than once and that had been always quite sexual. "I don't want that!"

"Why not?!" Tony waved with bills in his hand and they were led to a private room. "The girls make good money here and they enjoy their job. You're not exploiting them."

"Yeah, come on, Stevie! Live a little!" Bucky encouraged him and smiled brightly at the women who came into the room.

"Pepper is okay with this?" Steve hissed into Tony's ear. He wasn't single like Sam, Rhodey and Bucky were. What the fuck was he doing here?

"Of course." Tony shrugged. "She knows I would never hook up with one of those girls. There's only Pepper for me."

He still didn't think that a taken man should be here. A pretty girl was smiling at him and came closer. "Hey, handsome."

"Hi, ma'am." He replied automatically because his mother raised a gentleman. The girl smiled brighter and sat down on his lap. She was not wearing much, only a bralette and a skirt with a slit. He kept his hands in the air and saw out of the corner of his eye that Bucky was getting his own lap dance while the others watched the two other girls dancing.

"My name's Cassandra." He was pretty sure that wasn't her actual name but he understood why she used a fake one. She started dancing on top of him and all of this was just so wrong. This wasn't something he could enjoy. Cassandra started to unbutton his shirt and he pushed her off him.

"I don't want this."

The girl looked hurt but nodded and left the room. "What the fuck, punk?" Bucky asked with a raised eyebrow and then looked back at the girl dancing on top of him. "You don't just push a pretty girl away!" He looked back at him and frowned. "Where are your dog tags? You're not wearing them."

 _Yeah, because Natasha was._ He had given them to her unsure if he was being old-fashioned and cheesy but she seemed really touched and put them immediately on. She was wearing them ever since, hiding them under her winter sweaters. "I must have forgotten to put them on after my shower." He stood up. "I'm leaving. This is...this is just not my world." He left the strip club and called a cab. He would have get to the tower tomorrow to get his bike. He just wanted to go home and be with his girl. He prayed that Nat wouldn't be too mad at him for being at a strip club.

"Nat?" He walked through the hallway but she didn't answer him. He walked into his bedroom and there she was laying on the sheets in one of his shirts, her legs bare, her beautiful hair in a messy bun on her head and reading a book. She didn't answer him because she had headphones on.

She looked up at him with wide eyes and pulled her headphones down. "Fuck! What are you already doing here?" She looked at her phone. "It's only 9:32 pm. I didn't even get ready for you yet!" She smirked. "I got this black lace teddy I think you'll really like."

"I think I cheated on you!" He blurted out and she looked like someone slapped her.

"What?" The book dropped into her lap and her face was really pale. "What?"

"Tony took us to this strip club and I saw the breast of one girl and then another started to give me a lap dance but I pushed her off and...And I am so sorry, Nat. I didn't want any of this. I left right after I pushed the girl away."

"That's it?" She raised an eyebrow. "You didn't kiss anyone? Or slept with one of those girls?"

"What? Of course not!"

She got out of bed and slung her arms around his neck. "Then you didn't cheat on me, Steve."

"I didn't?"

She laughed a little. "No, you didn't. And I don't think you ever could."

"No, I love you."

She smiled. "I know. I love you, too." She kissed him softly. "You said that it was Tony's idea?" Her face darkened slightly and he nodded." Okay." Her face lit up again and she kissed him again and sucked on his lower lip. "You wanna see the lace teddy?"

"Yeah." He gulped out. Natasha smirked and disappeared to change her outfit. That night he got his own show with his girl stripping for him and giving him a lap dance among other things.

* * *

He went to the tower the next morning to pick up his bike. Natasha came with him and looked like a woman on a mission. He didn't really know what this was all about because he was still thinking about last night and the way Natasha's body had moved to the music.

The guys were curing their hangovers with breakfast in the common kitchen when they entered the room.

Two things happened at the same time. "Is Natasha wearing your dog tags?" Bucky asked and pointed at her neck and he saw that the necklace fell out of her sweater when she was charging at Tony jumping on the table and grabbing him by the collar.

"Don't ever make my boyfriend uncomfortable again, Stark! Going to a strip club with him! You know that he doesn't like this stuff!" She snarled and Tony looked like he had trouble breathing.

"Did you...Did you just say boyfriend?!" Tony choked out and looked like a mix out of fear and shock. "Are you two a thing?"

"Yes, and if you ever pull a stunt like that again I will castrate you! Got it, Stark?"

He nodded frantically and Natasha let go of his collar. "Good." She got off the table managing to avoid getting anything from the breakfast on her clothes and walked back to him taking his hand. "Steve and I are a couple and if any of you ever make him uncomfortable again, you'll have to deal with me, got it?"

Tony, Sam and Rhodey nodded and while Bucky just grinned. Natasha led Steve out of the kitchen back to the elevator. She looked at him with uncertainty in her eyes. "I'm sorry if I crossed a line or if it was too mu-"

He kissed her. "Good to know that I have my own knight in shining armor, doll." She laughed and he kissed her again. He was pretty sure that Tony would never mess with him again knowing that the Black Widow was protecting him.

* * *

 _Don't mess with Natasha Romanoff's man!_


	53. Homecoming (AU)

**_For_ _trebleclefstories._**

 _AU: Natasha and Steve are teachers at the Marvel High School and their students think they should totally be together._

* * *

"Miss Romanoff?"

Natasha looked up from the papers she was grading and looked at MJ. It was Saturday and it was Natasha's turn to watch over the kids who got detention.

"Yes, MJ?"

"Are you single?" MJ and the five other students looked at her.

Her eyes widened in surprise. "Since when do you care about the private life of other people?"

MJ shrugged. " I don't. I'm just curious and observant. And Wanda said she would give me twenty bucks if I asked you."

Maximoff was not here so she had no idea if that was true. "Yes, I am single. Not that it's any of your business."

"Interesting." MJ smiled and went back to doing her homework. Natasha started to think that MJ only got herself detention to ask her that question since the girl never got punished or rather got caught before.

She let the kids into their weekends two hours later and had to go to the teachers lounge to get a few things before she could head home too. Her friend Clint was in New York and wanted to meet her later. She hadn't seen him in ages and was really excited that he was in town.

Her colleague Steve was in the teachers lounge sitting over some papers. He started teaching Art and History at the Marvel High School last Fall and was really popular which she could understand. He was really nice and intelligent and quite handsome with his blue eyes, blond hair and muscular body. Not that she noticed that or anything.

"Hi, Steve. What are you doing here on a Saturday?"

He didn't seem to notice that she had walked into the teachers lounge. "Hey, Natasha. Just grading some papers. It's a bit too loud for that at my place right now."

She had no idea what that meant. Did he live with someone? Did he have a girlfriend? Of course, he did. A man like that was never single. "Okay?" She smiled and collected her things. "Have a nice weekend, Steve."

He smiled at her brightly. "You, too. See you on Monday, Natasha."

She nodded and left the school to drive home to get ready to go out with Clint. He took her to some hipster bar in Queens and he asked her if she was single or seeing someone because according to him it was time for her to feel the weight of a naked man on top of her again. She smacked his arm and ordered another drink. She had enough bad relationships and dates in the past to put the breaks on the whole meeting guys thing. She wanted to be single for some time, to be on her own.

"I don't need a man."

Clint rolled his eyes. "I didn't say you should marry the next dude you're dating. But you can't tell me you don't miss sex."

"I-" Was that Steve who just walked into the bar with other other guys? "Steve?" She blurted out. She didn't think he would be the type for this kind of bar with its weird and organic drinks. He seemed more like a beer and pizza guy.

Clint turned around. "Are you banging one of those guys?" He looked back at her. "Please tell me it's the blond one. Or maybe all three?" He grinned and she kicked his shin under the table.

"I'm not banging any of them. Steve's just a colleague."

"Which one?"

She crossed her arms. "The blond guy, if you must know."

His eyes lit up. "Let's ask them to join us. Maybe you'll get laid tonight, Tasha!"

"No! Don't you dare! Put your fucking arm down!" Thankfully Clint did and Steve didn't see her. They were just co-workers, spending time outside of work just seemed...weird. She spent the evening with Clint and then dropped him off at his hotel before driving home.

* * *

"Isn't this illegal?" Peter whispered while MJ let the air out of one tire of Miss Romanoff's car. She just rolled her eyes while Shuri told him to chill. He really thought they were overstepping some serious boundaries right now. What if they got caught? Aunt May would kill him!

"We're just letting some air out, we're not slashing her tires!" Shuri replied nonchalantly. Easy for her to say, her parents were super rich and she wasn't here on a scholarship like he was and he really didn't want to lose that. "Don't you want Romanoff and Rogers to get together?" Well yeah, but he also didn't want to get suspended. He liked both of them a lot and they were cool teachers but he really didn't want to get in trouble. "They're both the last teachers to leave the school and once Miss Romanoff realizes she can't drive home, Mr. Rogers will offer to take her on his bike and boom they fall in love."

MJ chuckled. "Fall in love or bang...whatever. Miss Romanoff needs some action in her love life."

"I still thi-"

Shuri raised her hand. "Silence, white boy. And watch if someone comes our way."

Today was not Natasha's day. She splashed coffee on her silk blouse and then her heel broke off. She didn't have another top with her but she had flats in her bag that she changed into. At least she was finally done for the day and could go home. She really was in the need for a hot bath and a glass of wine.

She was in the parking lot walking to her car when she noticed another thing. One of her tires was flat! "What the fuck! Seriously?" What had she done to piss off the universe?!

"Everything okay?" Steve asked behind her.

"No, my tire is flat. And I don't have another one in my trunk."

"Do you need a lift home? I got another helmet." He offered with a smile. "I don't mind to drive you home."

It would take ages until someone would show up to fix her tire. "Thank you. But only if it doesn't bother you too much."

"It doesn't." He went to his Harley and gave her a helmet. "You've ever been on a bike?"

"Years ago."

He nodded and sat down on his bike. He asked her if she had to get something out of her car but she shook her head, put the helmet on and sat down behind him.

"You can put your arms around my waist for support."

"Thanks." She mumbled and did as she was told. She was a bit nervous to be on a bike but she really wanted to get home. Holy shit, she could feel his muscles even through his shirt and leather jacket. She told him her address and he drove off. She didn't really notice it but she seemed to snuggle herself against Steve. He brushed his hand over hers on his stomach when they had to stop at a traffic light. "You okay?"

"Yeah, just not used to being on a bike."

"Don't worry. You're safe with me, ma'am."

They were at her apartment complex ten minutes later. "Thank you, Steve." She didn't know what came over her but she leaned forward and pressed a kiss on cheek.

"You're welcome." He gave her a pretty smile. "I see you tomorrow."

* * *

She somehow ended up spending more time with Steve. They sat together during the school sport games and ate their lunch together. She had mentioned that she needed to buy a new couch and Steve offered to help her get the thing into her apartment. She ordered pizza for them after they got the couch upstairs and they ate it on her couch while drinking beer. He was a really great guy and she liked him a lot but she didn't think that asking out a co-worker was a good idea.

Today was Homecoming and she was asked to be one of the chaperones. She put on a knee-length black dress and curled her hair. The prom was for the students but that didn't mean she couldn't look nice.

Coulson, Banner, Hill and Steve were also there besides a few parents to make sure the kids didn't get wasted and burned down the gym. She wasn't even ten minutes here when she already caught Brock trying to spike the punch. She confiscated his flask and told him to meet Principal Fury in his office. That was something that all students dreaded.

"Hey." Steve walked over to her. He looked really nice in his suit, he left the tie at home and she really like that look on him. "You look amazing. More like you should be at a fancy party and not a high school dance."

She laughed. She had been surprised that Steve could be quite the charmer sometimes. "Thanks. You look pretty dapper yourself."

"Ha, thanks." He looked like he didn't really believe her. "I guess this is me trying to enjoy my first high school dance."

Was he home-schooled? "Hm?"

"I wasn't very...I wasn't really a popular kid. I was skinny and always sick and only had one friend. I didn't go because I didn't want people to make fun of me."

"Oh..." That was really sad. He was such a nice guy and it didn't seem fair that he had missed out so much. She held her hand out. "Do you wanna embarrass the kids and dance with me?"

He blushed pretty hard. "What? Um...I don't really know how to dance..."

God, he was pretty cute when he was flustered. "Steve, this is a high school dance. No kid knows how to properly dance here. Just sway with the music. And me."

He wanted to say something but then he stumbled into her. She caught him and saw out of the corner of her eye MJ passing by. Did she push Steve? "Okay, let's dance. I feel like I already just made a fool out of myself."

She led him onto the dance floor and put his hands on her waist and slung her arms around his neck. He wasn't the next Fred Astaire but he wasn't worse than the teenage boys. At least Steve looked into her eyes and not at her boobs. God, she was so thankful that she wasn't a teenager anymore. He seemed to get the hang out of it and she had to admit that dancing with Steve was really nice. Like more than nice, she wanted him to kiss her.

"15 year old me would freak out if he saw me right now." Steve smiled and blushed. "I never thought I would get to dance with the prettiest girl of the whole school."

Now she was the one blushing. "I have a hard time believing that no girl wanted to dance with you. You're pretty smooth."

He laughed. "No, I'm really not. It...it just feels natural with you. And you really are very beautiful, Natasha."

Oh boy,do not kiss your co-worker in the middle of the gym in front of your students on Homecoming! "Do you want to get some drinks after this thing is over?"

"Are you asking me on a date, Miss Romanoff?"

"I think I am, Mister Rogers."

He smiled brightly at her. "In that case...I'd love to go out with you. I wanted to ask you out for ages. I'm glad one of us had the guts to do it."

* * *

"Guys!" Ned came running towards them with a red face and looked quite excited. The whole clique went out to go bowling and Peter was hoping tonight would be the night he finally got closer to MJ. Wanda did assure him that MJ liked him but he honestly wasn't so sure. She didn't really seem to care about him.

"Dude!" Shuri punched his shoulder. "Where's the food? You were supposed to get the food! You are even more useless than my brother!"

"I was going to get the nachos but guess who was standing in front of me?!" Ned looked at them with big eyes. "Mister Rogers and Miss Romanoff. And he pinched her freaking ass!"

"What?"

"Yeah, I think they're on a date here!" Ned looked around. "There!" He pointed at the last bowling alley and it truly was their teachers. Rogers was carrying the tray with their food and Miss Romanoff was giving him a peck on the lips when he put the tray down. Holy smokes!

"I'm not surprised." Shuri announced. "They looked pretty cozy at Homecoming a few weeks ago."

Peter looked over to them again and then immediately away. They were full on making out with Rogers' hands on his favorite teachers butt. Ew, weren't they too old for that?!

MJ leaned back against the cushions of the lounge and looked pretty pleased with herself. "And all of that just because I slashed her tires."

"You didn't slash them, you let the air out of one of them." He corrected her.

"Silence, white boy!" MJ and Shuri said at the same time and were grinning at each other. He didn't think he would get closer to MJ tonight or any time soon. He looked over to their teachers and Mister Rogers had his hands on Miss Romanoff's waist and showed her how to bowl while kissing her neck. Seriously, it should be forbidden for people of a certain age to do that in public!


	54. Let's keep it a secret

_Prequel to Wedding Bells. This one shot contains implied sexual content._

 _Steve and Natasha try to keep their new relationship a secret but they keep getting caught._

* * *

Natasha still couldn't really believe it. She was Steve's girlfriend. She was his _girl._ His _best girl_ as he had said it after they finally admitted that they loved each other. They had been chasing a warlord through the canals of Venice and then both just snapped when they were back at the hotel after almost dying and ended up in bed after Steve finally told her that he loved her and she whispered back that she felt the same. They both agreed they wanted to keep their relationship a secret for now. It was the first real relationship for both of them and they wanted to live in their little bubble as long as possible. And there was always the possibility that she would kill Tony if he made any Cold War jokes.

Sneaking around was a bit difficult since Steve lived with James but also really sexy. She started wearing more skirts and dresses so Steve had better access when an opportunity presented itself to have some fun. She hadn't exactly been vanilla before Steve but she had to admit that she never had so much sex before in so random places. Not that she was complaining, not at all. Someone like Steve wanting her so much did wonders to a girl's ego. And the sex was _incredible._ Captain America really knew how to treat a lady.

But she also loved doing all the things she used to scoff at. Holding hands, watching movies together on her couch more entranced with each other than the movie, kissing for hours, going on actual dates and her personal favorite waking up together. Not that it happened often with Steve living with his best friend so she enjoyed it even more when he stayed the night. The way he blinked his eyes open sleepily and the wide smile on his face once his eyes settle on her. It really made the butterflies in her stomach dance tango when he did that. Just the way he looked at her in general. Like she was something precious. She was so smitten with him, so in love with him. He had stolen her heart and she never wanted it back.

Their next mission would sent them to Buenos Aires and she already planned to add another day or two so she and Steve could have some quality time since it would be only the two of them on that mission. She was torn between spending the extra time completely in a hotel room or exploring the city. She packed some lingerie into her duffel bag and drove to the facility. Steve wasn't on the quinjet when she entered it but she figured he went through the mission details with Hill one more time before takeoff. She was just checking her weapons when he finally walked up the ramp of the jet. She smiled brightly at him but her smile fell when she noticed that he wasn't alone. James was also entering the quinjet. What the hell was he doing here? It was only supposed to be her and Steve taking out some bad guys and then having lots of sex!

"Fury thinks we need more manpower." Steve explained with an excusing smile. Great, so now she was getting cockblocked by her boss?!

"Hi, Romanoff." James nodded and then dropped down on a seat. "Wake me up when we're in Buenos Aires."

She liked James, he was a good guy, he was a great addition to the team and him being back made Steve really happy so she was generally in favor of James but not right now. She hadn't really spent time with Steve in two weeks and she wanted to get laid!

She stormed into the cockpit and plopped down in the pilot's seat typing the coordinates for their destination in. Steve came in shortly after and sat down beside her. "I'm just as blindsided as you are. I didn't know he would come as well."

She looked over her shoulder to make sure that James wasn't watching but he had his eyes closed and headphones on. She placed her hand on his knee. "I know. I'm not mad at you. Or James for that matter. I just...I miss you."

He gave her that dopey grin that made her heart flutter. "I miss you, too. All the time." He put his hand on hers and intertwined their fingers. "I love you, doll."

She blushed a little bit like she did every time when he told her that he loved her. "I love you, too."

They spent three days in a small safe house with only one bed that Steve and James left to her and she wanted to actually cry when she watched how Steve rolled out his sleeping bag on the floor next to her bed. They were sleeping in the same room and yet she wasn't using his chest as her pillow! He couldn't even sneak into her bed since James slept in the same room with them and had like all three of them a light sleep. The mission was a success and they could finally return to the States.

She waved her hand in front of James' closed eyes but he didn't move and the snipping of her fingers didn't get through his headphones. Now or never. She dragged Steve into the small bathroom of the quinjet.

"You okay?"

Her hands moved to his belt. "No, but I will be soon. Pull your pants down, Captain." She shimmied out of her catsuit and panties and jumped on the sink. Steve finally got what she wanted and complied willingly. They muffled their moans by kissing and she wasn't the only who seemed more relaxed after they finally had sex. Steve had been a bit tense as well in the last days. They were still kissing and he was still inside her and she knew that it wouldn't take much to get him going for a second round when a knock startled them both.

"Are you two done now? Some of us have to use the bathroom for its original purpose." James said with thick amusement in his voice.

They both stared at each other with wide eyes. Fuck, they had been caught! They quickly got dressed and stumbled out of the bathroom being greeted by James' smug face. "If you tell anyone about this, you'll need another metal arm!" She threatened and he only laughed in return.

"Can't believe you're finally getting laid, punk!" He clapped Steve's shoulder and walked into the bathroom.

Steve seemed unsure about the whole thing. "Nat?"

So far they had one witness and she hoped it would stay that way for some time but she wasn't exactly mad that James now knew. "I guess I can now stay over at your place."

Steve smiled and kissed her. "Yeah, I guess so too."

James did complain that they were pretty loud and knocked on Steve's bedroom door more than once but Steve only always told him the next morning that he hadn't been any better back in the day.

* * *

It was nice now being able to spend time at Steve's place. Now they had another safe place where they could just be themselves and enjoy their love. Despite James constant complain about them showing too much PDA he seemed to be happy for them and he really seemed to enjoy to tease Steve about them being together or rather about the fact that Steve wasn't a virgin anymore.

They were together for three months now and Steve invited her to a very romantic Italian restaurant in Long Island. The chance that someone would see them here was pretty slim and she was really looking forward to a date night with her man. She took the liberty to book a hotel room near by so they didn't have to drive back to the city.

Steve raised his champagne glass. "To three months. The happiest three months in my life."

She was pretty sure she was blushing. "Yeah, to three months of pure happiness." She clinked her glass with his and they enjoyed an amazing dinner. She wondered how Steve had found this place.

They were waiting for dessert when Sam walked into the restaurant with two older people. Maybe his parents? Her eyes widened and she jumped under the table.

"Did you lose something?" He asked and looked under the table. "Do you need help?"

"Sam's here!" She hissed. What was she supposed to do now? She couldn't spend the rest of the date under the table and Sam would probably wonder why Steve was alone here.

"What?" He hissed back. "Where?" His head disappeared. "Oh."

"Cap? What are you doing here?" Sam's voice was getting closer. Shit, shit, shit!

"Um..."

"He's obviously on a date, sweetie." A female voice answered for Steve. She was pretty sure that this woman was Sam's mother.

"Hi, Mrs. Wilson. Mr. Wilson." Steve greeted politely.

"Is she right? Are you on date?" Sam whistled. "Never thought I see the day, Steve. You finally moved on from Nat? Who's the lucky lady?"

She took a deep breath and came back from under the table and sat down on her chair. "Actually..."

Sam's eyes widened. "Holy shit!" He laughed. "Finally!"

His mother took his arm. "Show some manners. Have a lovely evening, you two." She gave them a smile and led the two other men away from their table.

"So, Sam knows too." Steve huffed a laugh out.

She laughed too. "Looks like it."

They decided to take the dessert to go and celebrate their anniversary in their hotel room. She only sent Sam a text to make sure that he kept what he saw tonight to himself before she gave herself over to Steve completely.

* * *

"Thank you so much for helping us with this." Coulson said for the hundredth time mostly to Steve. SHIELD needed backup and they both flew to the playground to help them with a mission.

"No problem, Coulson. We're glad to help." Steve replied and didn't seem to notice how happy his presence Coulson made. She snickered to herself and followed both men into Coulson's office to go with the rest of the team through the mission details.

The mission led them to Serbia taking out a HYDRA base and everything went smoothly. Coulson's team was good and together they had no problem to swipe the place. SHIELD booked hotel rooms for everyone since the quinjet wasn't ready yet to take off again after HYDRA managed to mess with its system.

She waited half an hour after everyone went to their rooms and texted Steve to come to hers. He knocked on her door two minutes later and she showed him her _appreciation_. Seeing him fight always turned her on and today was no difference. They were about to start round two when someone knocked on the door.

"It's May." She said from the other side of the door.

 _Shit_. She shoved a naked Steve into the bathroom, brushed her fingers through her hair and slipped the hotel robe on before she opened the door. "Hey. What's up?"

She handed her a file. "Coulson wants the Avengers to take a look at this case. He thinks it's a number too big for us."

She took it. "Will do. Have a good night, Melinda."

"You, too." May started to smirk. "Same goes to you, Captain Rogers." She said in a louder voice.

She decided to play dumb. "What? He's not here."

Melinda's smirk got wider. "Sure. And you just happen to wear the same shoes as him? Don't think that's your size, Natasha." She pointed at the shoe peeping under the bed. Shit, she hadn't kick both of them under it. "Where is he? Hiding under the bed? The closet?"

Now it was her turn to grin. "The bathroom, actually. This stays between us?"

"Of course. Coulson had enough trouble for the day. His heart's not the youngest anymore. Good night and have fun." May winked and left.

Well, now May knew but she could keep a secret and they barely saw her. So it was okay. She got Steve out of the bathroom and pushed him onto the bed to finally start round two.

* * *

Since Sam and James both knew now, they went out with them from time to time with Sam being pretty pissed that James found out about them before him. She didn't really care about that and focused on nibbling on Steve's neck in their booth while Sam and James were bitching in front of them. Steve seemed a bit helpless like he was every time those two were fighting but her lips on his neck seemed to distract him quite a bit. So much that he threw a few bills on the table, took her hand and dragged her to his place.

The whole team was the facility in Upper New York for training and team bonding. The whole day was spent in the woods with a tactical simulation and she was pretty exhausted. Everyone went to bed right after dinner but she wanted to make herself a tea before she went to bed. Steve was already in the common kitchen when she walked in.

"Hey." He smiled at her. "I was just making you a cup of tea." He held a mug up.

"God, you're perfect." She said with a smile and took the mug out of his hand. "I love you."

He smiled fondly at her. "I love you, too."

She sipped on her tea and then placed it on the counter to kiss him as thank you. He really was such a thoughtful boyfriend. The kiss grew deeper and hotter and he lifted her on the kitchen counter to stand between her legs. She wrapped her legs around his waist and explored his mouth with her tongue. God, he was a great kisser. His hands disappeared under her hoodie cupping her breast. They had never sex here before and now was the perfect moment with everyone asleep. His hands moved to the clasp of her bra and it seemed like he had the same idea. She smirked into the kiss and pulled him closer to her, rolling her hips.

"Motherfucker!" Fury suddenly yelled and something shattered to the floor.

They stopped making out and looked into the direction where Fury's voice was coming from. He stared at them and it looked like he had dropped a coffee mug or something.

"This is what you guys do when I'm not around? Make out like horny teenagers?! You know that SHIELD has a rule against fraternization, Romanoff!"

"Then it's good that we don't work for SHIELD anymore!" She sassed back and led a flustered Steve ,who held his hands over his crotch, out of the kitchen.

"Oh my God!" He whined with a red face. "Why do I feel like Fury is gonna kill me tonight?!"

"He's not gonna do anything. Come on, let's continue this at my quarters." She kissed him until he was relaxed again and followed her to her rooms.

* * *

Steve had been on a mission in South Africa and got hurt. She ran to the infirmary as soon as she heard that he was back. He was standing in the room still wearing his suit, the shield leaning against the wall.

"Steve?"

"Just had a dislocated shoulder and a few bruises. I'm okay." He smiled at her. "Don't worry."

She ran over to him and cupped his face to kiss him since they were alone. "Thank God!" She whispered between kisses and slung her arms around his neck and he lifted her off the ground to even out their height difference since she wore sneakers today. She could lose herself in him, only he mattered to her and she couldn't stop kissing him. God, she loved this man so much. She didn't think she could live without him.

"Um, we'll come back later." Dr. Cho coughed and they looked up to see a flustered Helen and a smirking Hill. Great, now six people knew about them.

"No." She tapped Steve on the shoulder and he let her back down. "Do your check up now. I want to make sure he's okay."

"Oh, look at you being the worried girlfriend." Maria teased her and handed Steve papers he had to sign.

"Shut the fuck up, Hill!" She hissed back and watched how Helen took a look at Steve but didn't find any more injuries. Helen and Maria left the room and she was alone with Steve again.

"Are you okay with so many people knowing about us?" He asked her and rubbed the back of his neck. "I know you're a private person."

"I would have liked if we could have kept it a secret for a bit longer but I don't mind. They were gonna know eventually. And not everyone knows. Tony, Rhodey and Wanda don't know."

"Oh God, I don't want Tony to know yet." Steve groaned and she walked to the door to lock it before she closed the blinds. "What are you doing, doll?"

She walked over to him making sure her hips were swaying nicely. "Have you ever had sex in a hospital room?"

"You know I haven't." True, she was his first and she loved that fact more than she probably should. She loved it that she was the first and hopefully last person he experienced this with.

"You wanna have sex in a hospital room?"

He nodded eagerly and she couldn't help but find it endearing. She had found out pretty early that Steve Rogers liked sex _a lot._ "Yeah, I think I do."

And of course Rhodey and Wanda were standing in the hallway when they sneaked out of the hospital room two hours later with sex hair and Steve had left a purple mark on her neck. And judging by the Rhodey's smirk and the blush on Wanda's face they both knew exactly what she and Steve had been doing in that room.

Now Tony was the only one who didn't know and she really wanted to keep it that way for some time.

* * *

Thankfully Tony was almost never at the facility and he never showed up at her apartment or Steve's so they were safe. They had a dinner with the team and everyone seemed to be happy for them that _they finally got together._

All of them flew to Manhattan for Tony's birthday party. She and Steve agreed that they didn't want to tell Tony yet that they were a couple. She just didn't want Tony to make jokes about Steve that made him uncomfortable. She loved Stee and she wanted to protect him. Tony could say all kinds of crap about her but not about Steve. She wouldn't allow it. She knew that Tony was deep down a good guy and cared about them but some of his jokes just went too far.

Steve was already at the party when she went up to the penthouse. She spent a lot of effort in getting ready since she hadn't been to a party in ages and she wanted to look good as Steve's girlfriend (even if only a few people knew that little detail). She put her hair in a chignon, painted her lips red and chose a backless little dress that clung to her body. She looked really good if she could say so herself. Steve seemed to agree because he choked on his beer when he looked into her direction causing James to turn around and he smirked when he saw her. He turned back to Steve and said something that made him blush. She winked at her boyfriend and then went to the bar to order a drink. She did a bit of small talk with people that she hadn't seen in a while and kept glancing into Steve's direction. He was looking at her with heat in his eyes and it seemed like he was ready to ravish her right here at this party. That dress had been really worth that much money.

She sent Steve a text to meet her at the bathroom in the hallway in five minutes. She only got a _yes ma'am_ back and she bit her lip in excitement. She was already out of the penthouse walking towards the bathroom when she ran into Tony.

"Happy birthday." She kissed his cheek.

"Thanks." He eyed her carefully. "Is there anything you wanna tell me? Cap's been looking at you all night like he wants to eat you. Is there something going on between you two? Are you two hooking up?"

She kept her face completely straight. "Of course not. You had too much to drink?"

He checked her face and the shook his head. "Yeah, must be it. Enjoy my party." And then he walked back into the penthouse. That was close. She quickly got to the bathroom and waited for Steve. The door opened three minutes later and he pushed her immediately against the door after he locked it.

"You look amazing, doll." He kissed her deeply and pushed her dress over her waist groaning when he saw that she wasn't wearing any underwear.

She was reapplying her lipstick after he rocked her world and trying to fix the mess that was her hair. Her chignon was ruined and she decided to just let her hair fall over her shoulders. Steve watched her while he buttoned up his dress shirt. "I like this color on you."

She looked over her shoulder and smirked. "I could tell by the way you pounded me into the door."

He blushed and walked over and kissed her bare back. "I love you."

"Love you, too." She smiled and put her lipstick back into her clutch. "You go out first and then me. Okay?"

He nodded and gave her a peck on the lips before he left the bathroom. She waited two minutes and then walked out as well running into Steve and Tony who were talking in the hallway.

Tony looked from Steve to her and then from her to Steve. His eyes widened and he pointed his finger at them. "No! That can't be...Nooo.. Did you guys just fuck in my bathroom?!"

Steve looked over to her clearly waiting to see how she would react to Tony catching them. She walked over to them and kissed Steve deeply. "Yes, we did."

"You told me like half an hour ago that you two weren't a thing, Romanoff!"

"You asked me if we were hooking up and we're not. We're dating. We are in a relationship and you're not allowed to make any jokes if you wanna keep your limps."

It looked like there was a storm brewing inside of Tony like he was deciding if his jokes were worth losing his limps. "Fine. But I'll send you the cleaning bill for that bathroom." He shook himself. "Yikes. Can't believe Captain America sneaks out of a party to have sex!" He muttered under his breath when he walked back inside.

"So, now everyone knows."

"Yup." She took his hand. "Guess now we can sit down on one of those couches and make out like the other couples here."

Steve smiled and pressed a kiss to the back of her hand before they walked back into the party. They didn't make out but she did sit down on his lap and exchanged soft kisses with him every now and then. Tony watched them the whole night with a disgusted look on his face. If she had known that them being together would make him that uncomfortable she would have told him about them ages ago!

* * *

 _To that one guest reviewer: I don't write about real people. I personally think it's weird and an invasion of their privacy._


	55. Author's note

Hi guys,

I just wanted to let you know that I have a writer's block and I'm not writing anything at the moment. I'm on hiatus until I find the time and inspiration to write again. I'm sorry, guys!


	56. I didn't want you to be alone III

Third part of _I didn't want you to be alone._

 _Steve is determent to bring Natasha and the others back to life after Thanos wiped them out._

* * *

Thor voiced the theory that everyone who died after Thanos had snapped his fingers was trapped in the Soul Stone and that they weren't truly gone for good. Steve wanted to believe his theory, wanted to believe that they could save their friends. That he could save _her._ But he was still so heartbroken. He lost his two best friends and the love of his life. He didn't think that he would survive if Thor's theory turned out to be wrong and they were truly gone for good. How was he supposed to live without Natasha? The woman he would always love. The woman who made him find his place in this new world. _Beside her_.

He and Thor were the last ones still up after they returned to the palace and tried to understand what had happened a few hours ago. Shuri's screams after Okoye had informed her about T'challa's death were still ringing in his ears.

Thor put a hand on his back and gave him a sad smile. "How are you?"

"I don't know. I don't think I really realized what happened. I don't...I really thought we would win-"

"We will. We'll stop Thanos and we'll get them back."

"Natasha asked me to marry her before we went into battle." He blurted out and he remembered how nervous she had looked when she asked him.

Thor smiled a real genuine smile this time. "Aye, that sounds like her. Proposing to you and not the other way around."

"Yeah."

"You'll get her back. I know you will."

If there was even a slight chance to bring her back, to bring everyone back, then he wouldn't stop until she was back in his arms. He would do anything to get her back.

* * *

It took them two years, Tony's return from space with the sad news that Peter Parker was dead as well and the arrival of Captain Danvers to track down Thanos in another galaxy. Danvers told them something about Kree aliens and having their powers and that Fury had tried to reach her before he vanished. She was positive that she could stop Thanos once and for all and she truly did. It was a vicious fight but Danvers killed him in the end and destroyed the Infinity Stones. People who had vanished on the planet they were currently on reappeared and Danvers was sure that everyone else reappeared where they had been turned into ashes.

He wanted to leave this planet immediately and return to Wakanda to see if she was truly back. Shuri knew that they had left Earth to go after Thanos and he was sure that she would tell Natasha where he was but he hated it that he wasn't there when she came back to life. She was probably confused and he wasn't there for her.

It took them two months until they finally entered the Earth orbit again and six more hours until they landed with Captain Danvers' ship in Wakanda. The ramp wasn't even completely down when he ran out of the ship with Rhodey yelling after him to calm his horses. He smiled at T'challa who told him that the rest of the team was waiting inside the palace. He nodded his thanks and then ran as fast as he could to the private wing of the palace.

"Hey, Cap!" Sam was smiling brightly at him. "Good to see you and thanks for saving us all."

He hugged him. "You have no idea how good it is to see you! And Captain Danvers did most of the work!"

"Who?"

"You'll meet her soon enough. Where's-?"

"Nat?" Sam finished for him and he nodded. "She's in the medical wing with Barnes."

His heart started racing. "Is she...Are they okay?"

Sam grinned. "Yes, they are. Nat has quite the surprise for you." Sam clapped his shoulder. "I'm gonna say hi to everyone else and you should go to the medical wing."

"Okay." He nodded confused and let the AI lead him to the infirmary of the palace. What was going on? He walked through the palace until he finally ended up where he wanted to be and knocked on the door where the AI said Natasha and Bucky were. He opened the door and Natasha was laying on a cot with her shirt pulled up smiling brightly at him when she saw him. Bucky was sitting by her side but stood up.

"Finally you're here, punk!" He hugged him. "Thanks for saving us. And congratulations. I'll see you later." He smiled at him and then left the room.

"Hi, soldier." Natasha held her hand out and he hastily walked over to her and took it. "Thank you for everything. I knew you'd save us."

He started to tear up. She was really here. She was back. He had her back. "I was so lost without you. The last two years were hell, Nat. I missed you so much!"

"We missed you, too." She whispered and pulled his head down and kissed him. He couldn't believe he was finally kissing her again. She was really back and not one of his countless dreams of her. "I love you."

The doctor coughed and he remembered that they were in the infirmary. "Nat, what's wrong with you?"

She smiled brightly at him. "Nothing, nothing at all." She cupped his face and turned it towards a screen. "Look! That's our baby!"

What? He starred at the screen and then at her. "What?"

"It's a miracle! Me getting pregnant and then the baby surviving inside me in the Soul Stone these last two years. Time was stopped for us inside it so the baby didn't grow and I had no idea I was pregnant. I only realized it a few weeks ago. I'm three months along."

"You're pregnant?" He asked quietly. "Really?"

She nodded at the doctor and the room was suddenly filled with the sound of a steady heart beat. "That's the baby, Captain Rogers."

"We're having a baby." He whispered and kissed her with everything he had. He heard faintly how the doctor left the room. "You're pregnant."

Natasha grinned. "Where you always this slow? This is good, right?"

"Of course! This is great! We're gonna be a real family!" He kissed her face over and over again. He had the love of his life back and they were going to be _parents_. All the pain and sorrow of the last two years were gone. He was finally happy again. He had never been this happy before, actually.

"You still wanna marry me? Make an honest woman out of me before our baby comes?" She asked against his lips. _Our baby._ Wow. He was going to be a father.

"Yes." He kissed her again because he finally could kiss her again.

"You wanna marry me tonight? I had a lot of free time to plan a wedding since I came back from the dead." She cupped his face and looked him in the eyes.

"Yes. Let's get married today!"

* * *

 _I'm still not really back but I hope you like this little one shot and you're happy that Nat's back from the dead._


	57. Another bet

_Thank you for your reviews!_

 ** _For NatRose17, Sorry you had to wait so long and I hope you like it._**

 _Steve isn't allowed to engage in strenuous activities after getting shot but still tries to get Natasha to engage in them with him in the bedroom so she comes up with a bet to keep him out of her pants._

* * *

Natasha had never cried in her life before. Never, no matter what the Red Room had done to her or had made her do, she never cried. But then Steve got shot several times during a mission and the tears were just streaming down her face when she was alone with him in his hospital room and informed that he almost died. It had looked really bad for him and despite having the serum it would take weeks for him to heal. One bullet had gazed his heart and it was a miracle that he was still alive.

So she cried until no more tears were left and tried to calm down before Steve woke up. He could have died, he could have left her. She could have lost him. She reached for his hand and intertwined her fingers with his. She loved him so much. Opened herself up to him, told him everything about her and he was still here. They moved in together last month and now this happened. She had fought her feelings for him so long, not really knowing what to do. She was never taught how to love and be affectionate but Steve had been so patient with her. She remembered how he had shown up with flowers at her apartment on her birthday and she had just jumped into his arms and kissed him hard and almost angrily because he was so sweet and good and she wasn't. But Steve had just pulled away and then had kissed her so softly that it had been good that she had been already wrapped around his waist because her knees got weak. She had ran away after he had told her for the first time that he loved her and waited for her until she had got her act back together and came back to tell him that she loved him, too. He was her everything and she would do anything for him.

Two hours later Steve opened his beautiful blue eyes and she immediately kissed him softly on the lips before she gave him something to drink.

"What happened, Nat?" He managed to creak out.

"You got shot. Four times. You...You almost died, Steve." New tears were flowing out of her eyes. "Don't do that again."

"Sorry." He mumbled out and gave her a sheepish grin. "Didn't mean to worry you."

She shook her head and climbed into the hospital bed with him after he made room for her. "I think I'll always worry about you. I love you."

"I love you, too."

* * *

She liked to take care of Steve since he was prohibited to do anything too active and had to rest at their apartment. Steve was usually the one doting on her but as it turned out she could do it as well. She made him food, changed his bandages and helped him shower. She always made sure that he would get everything he could possibly need or want and went with him to every of his doctor's appointments. She never thought she could be caring but it seemed that Steve liked her doting on him. And she liked it, too. This was something that she could do for him.

Steve was pretty beat in the first week and mostly sleeping or sitting on their couch drawing or reading. But then the second week went along and he was still prohibited to engage in any strenuous activities but he still tried to have sex with her. It was kind of good to know that he was feeling well enough that he wanted to have sex but the doctors said no and they were the ones who went to medical school and not Steve. She didn't budge no matter how hard he tried to convince her. He wasn't fully healed yet and she didn't want to be the reason for his stitches popping or something even worse happening to him.

So she ignored him when he came only wrapped in a tiny towel after a shower into the bedroom or trailed kisses along her neck when she was preparing their dinner. No, she wasn't going to sleep with him!

He was almost back to full strength in the third week after his accident but the doctors still wanted him to rest and Dr. Cho explicitly said that sex was still off the table until Steve was fully cleared by the doctors. He clearly thought he knew better than Helen because he tried to get under her skirt when they watched a movie after they got home. It wasn't like she didn't want to have sex with him, she really, _really_ wanted to but she had to stay strong. His increased heart rate during sex could cause his heart damage after getting gazed with a bullet three weeks ago. Steve wasn't the only one who was horny and she really deserved a medal each time she said no to him. Because she clearly had a will made out of iron if she could say no to a super soldier who forgot to put his shirt on around the house (she knew he did that on purpose!).

She was already in bed reading a magazine when Steve came out of the bathroom in only low hanging pajama pants that perfectly showed off the v line of his hips. The Lord and Steve were really testing her! One look into Steve's face told her that he wanted to have sex tonight and she noticed that her resistance was getting weaker but she couldn't sleep with him. His health was more important than their ragging hormones! She had to come up with something to stop Steve from trying to sneak his way into her pants. He walked over to her and leaned over to kiss her. He always gave her a good night kiss but he tried to slip his tongue into her mouth. It had been so long since they even french-kissed because she was scared that it would lead to something more. He moved to lay on top of her and she was weak and let his tongue find its way into her mouth. God, that felt so good. She felt him poking her against her thigh and she really had to stop this before her brain stopped working completely. His hand cupped her breast over her camisole and she arched into his touch moaning. Okay, she had to stop this! He started to nip and suck on her neck and her mind got more and more lust-clouded by the second. They had to stop! He slipped one hand under her top and cupped her breast again. Oh, that was really nice. Why did they have to stop again? He pressed against her groin and she rewarded him with a low moan. He was hurt, that's why they had to stop. How should she- _Oh._ Steve's mouth closed around her nipple. Nope, get your head back in the game! Game! Steve was competitive and stubborn! That was it! She should just bet with him to see who could go on the longest without sex!

Steve's tongue was circling around her nipple and she was really tempted to just give into him but she knew she couldn't. "Steve?" He hummed against her breast but didn't stop his movement. "Steve!"

He released her breast with a wet plop and looked up at her with hunger in his eyes. She really just wanted to get rid of their clothes so he could take her but she was on a mission here. "How long do you think you can go without sex?"

"Five seconds?" He grinned and was about to pull her shorts down her legs.

"No, I'm serious. I don't think you would last very long. I think I can be celibate so much longer than you could. You would really give in after five seconds if I try to seduce you."

Something changed in his eyes and she knew that she had him. "I can be celibate way longer than you. You would be the one begging me to finally sleep with you!"

Of course, Steve Rogers wouldn't say no to a challenge! "You wanna bet on that? First one who gets weak and wants to have sex has to do the other one's paperwork for a month?"

"What?" Steve looked confused but then nodded. "Fine. But don't whine when you have to write more reports."

She snorted. "As if I would lose!"

* * *

Steve was cleared for work and all kinds of strenuous activities one week later and she really thought that he would accept his defeat as soon as they got home and they would have sex until they were both too exhausted to move but of course he didn't. Because Steve Rogers was a stubborn asshole and wanted to win that bet. He had stopped trying to seduce her in the last week but ever since he had got his go from the doctors he tried to get _her_ to give in. He clearly wanted to sleep with her (they hadn't had sex in one freaking month) but he also didn't want to lose the bet. And since she was also competitive and it had been her idea in the first place, she didn't give in and tried to get him to lose as well. So they were both stubborn assholes who needed to get laid.

And it also didn't help that Tony innocently asked Steve after a mission when the last time was he got laid since he was so tense all the time. Tony looked like he wanted to ask her something too but Steve snapped at him to fly them back to Manhattan.

Another two sexless weeks passed and she started to think that her bet had been the dumbest idea she had ever had. And she had done some dumb shit on her missions. She tried to get Steve to give in by putting lotion on her naked body in front of him and he watched the whole thing with interest but he didn't jump her like she hoped he would. He tried to get back to her by wearing tight boxer briefs that didn't leave much to the imagination (God bless America!) but she wasn't going to give in. She only came up with this stupid bet to protect his health. She didn't deserve to do his paper work for one fucking month!

She got her good night kiss from Steve and then rolled onto her side of the bed before she got any stupid ideas and jumped his bones.

"I love you." Steve said before he hit the lights off.

"I love you, too."

She knew she was dreaming because there was no way that Steve would end this bet on his own. He was rocking her world and she completely enjoyed this dream because she knew she wouldn't get any anytime soon. In her dream Steve was _this_ close to making her come when someone shook her shoulders.

"Nat!" The real Steve was now talking to her. "Nat, wake up!"

"What?" She blinked her eyes open and noticed how turned on she was from her sex dream. Would it be cheating if she sneaked into the bathroom to touch herself?

"I can't take it anymore!" Steve growled and pulled her against him. "Those sounds you made in your dream...I just can't take it anymore." She could feel how aroused he was against her groin and she moaned. "Please, Natasha. Enough teasing! Let's have finally sex again!"

She nodded frantically and gave him a hard and desperate kiss. She really needed him right now. Six weeks of celibacy and now that dream made her crave him beyond relief. Finally they were going to have sex again! Steve got her already out of her top and was about to remove her panties when she realized something. "Ha, I won the bet!"

"Are you really thinking about this _now_?" He growled and slid her panties off before getting rid of his own underwear.

She laughed and wrapped her legs around his waist when he settled between them. "Yup. You would be smug as well, Captain!"

They didn't leave their apartment for three days and only did when some maniac threatened to blow up Times Square. They stopped the bad guy and then immediately left to get back to Brooklyn. They had more catching up to do.


	58. Handyman

_Stuff in Natasha's apartment keeps getting broken and Steve keeps fixing it for her. And both of them don't realize that they are being set up by someone._

* * *

Natasha's bed broke down on one side and was now uneven. She had no idea how this could have happened. She had paid a lot of money for it and then it suddenly just collapsed when she got out of it one morning. She tried to fix it herself but she had no talent when it came to this stuff. She didn't want to hire someone because she didn't want to give her address to a stranger and she was too proud to ask one of her friends. Clint had been the one who had assembled her furniture while she and Laura had been shopping new curtains. But Clint was on vacation with his family and she was on her own. She briefly wondered if she should call Steve because she knew that he would help her but she didn't want him to think that she needed him. They had been in this weird stage between friends and something more for months now and she didn't want him to think that she needed a man to help her. She tried to fix the bed frame again but was unsuccessful. She kicked the bed groaning and left for a meeting with the team.

The others were already there and they talked about a potential mission in South Asia if the situation got worse. Fury wanted to send Barnes on his first solo mission and Steve being the worried mother hen that he was had some issues with that but Barnes assured him and Fury that he was ready. He left immediately after the meeting for Denver and she asked Steve if he wanted to watch a movie at her place. She kind of regretted it the moment she asked because movie nights between them were filled with romantic and sexual tension and it was only a matter of time until someone snapped. She hoped it would be Steve because she still wasn't completely sure she was ready for something _more._ Being with him would be something serious and life changing and not just some fling. But she stopped regretting it when he gave her a bright smile and followed her back to her apartment.

She had forgotten to close the bedroom door and Steve walked right into her bedroom. Wow, she didn't think that he wanted to get intimate so soon. They didn't even had their first real kiss yet. The one on the escalator didn't count. She was nervous and excited at the same time and followed him into her room and then immediately realized why he marched right into it. He didn't want to have sex, he was kneeling on the floor looking at her bed.

"How long has it been like that?" He asked and picked her screwdriver up from the floor.

"Um, since last week."

He turned around and looked at her. "You can't use your own bed for one week?" His voice got softer. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"I wanted to fix it on my own."

"Oh, Nat." He smiled softly and turned back to her bed. He fixed it within the next ten minutes and she tried her best not to get her ego hurt. She had spent at least five hours trying to fix it. She was truly a moron when it came to this stuff.

Steve sat down on the edge of the bed. "It's secure now. It won't crash down again." He got up and moved to the other side of the bed. "But I'd like to check if the other screws are loose as well."

They weren't and Steve followed her into her living room where they watched some movie. She was pretty sure that Steve wasn't watching the screen as well and focused on her. She could feel his warmth and she wanted to just grab his face and kiss him senseless. But she couldn't. She was scared. Who would have thought that she could get scared at all. And then because of a nice and sweet boy from Brooklyn.

* * *

Steve didn't mention that he fixed her bed and she was very grateful. She was still embarrassed that she couldn't do something like that by herself. Home renovating hadn't been really on the training schedule in the Red Room.

Steve, who was over the moon that Barnes returned safely from his first solo mission, would be here soon for his first dancing lesson (was this their first date?!) and she wanted to do the dishes before he showed up. She just put the last plate into the cupboard when the whole fucking thing just crashed down and her dishes just broke into a million pieces. Her reflexes were fast and she jumped out of the way before she could have gotten hurt.

Someone knocked on the door very loudly. "Nat, are you okay?" It was Steve. "I heard a crash. Are you okay? If you don't answer, I'm gonna break this door in."

She knew that he would do that. "I'm fine." She yelled and quickly got to her front door to let Steve in before she had a Captain America shaped hole in her wall. "My cupboard just...fell down. I don't know what happened."

"Are you hurt?" He grabbed her shoulders gently.

"No."

He sighed in relief and let go of her. He walked into the kitchen and looked at the mess on her kitchen floor. "Oh boy."

"Yeah." She got a broom to clean this mess up. Thankfully she got her dishes from IKEA and not some fancy store.

"It looks like the cupboard wasn't really connected to the wall. Who built this kitchen?" Steve asked picking up the cupboard and putting it on the counter. It didn't look damaged at all. Weird.

"Clint did." And he knew what he was doing. Why did that cupboard fall off the wall? Steve looked like he was wondering the same and then he looked amused. Did he- did he think she did that on purpose? "I didn't do this!"

Steve held his hands up. "Okay, okay. You want me to screw it back into the wall?"

Suddenly a totally different kind of screwing into a wall flashed through her mind and she was thankful that Captain America wasn't a mind reader. "Yes, that would be great. Thank you."

He fixed the cabinet and even went with her to IKEA to help her carry her new dishes home. Okay, _he_ carried everything and she ate a hot dog.

* * *

She went to Steve's place to pick him up so they could go to a street festival in Brooklyn together. They were still in this weird state of their relationship and she started to wonder if they missed their window and Steve lost his interest in her. Barnes was also home and she asked him if he wanted to tag along.

He shook his head. "No, I already have something to do."

Steve raised an eyebrow. "And what? You didn't tell me you had plans."

"I don't have to tell you everything, punk." Barnes replied and went back to read his book.

She just rolled her eyes at their exchange and left the apartment with Steve to go to to the festival. The festival was great and they had a lot of fun and there had been one moment where she was sure that he would kiss her but he didn't. It really looked like they missed their window.

Steve walked her back to her apartment and used the bathroom before he would would go back to Brooklyn. She was mad at herself. She should have asked Steve out on a date or kissed him months ago and now it was too late. He wasn't interested in her like that anymore. It was only a matter of time until he found the perfect girl and she was all forgotten.

She heard Steve shriek and ran to the bathroom. She opened the door and the faucet was splashing water everywhere and Steve was soaked. He chose to wear a white t-shirt today and she could see right through the wet fabric. God bless America, indeed! She licked her lips and fought the urge to just jump him.

"I just wanted to wash my hands, Nat!" He shrieked and moved his hands to the faucet to somehow stop the water. "I'm so sorry! Do you have pliers?"

She was still staring at his body when she realized that he was talking to her. "Pliers? Right. One sec." She left and came back with them and Steve fixed the faucet. She gave him a towel and his shirt that she had stolen months ago so he could change into something dry. She was glad that he didn't comment on the fact that she had one of his shirts.

"Nat, is there something you wanna tell me?"

"I'm sorry that I stole your shirt...I just-"

"That's not what I mean, Nat. The screws on your bed frame and kitchen cabinet were loosened. Same thing with the faucet." He raised his eyebrow. "Did you do that so you had a reason for me to come over?"

"What?" She got angry. Did he seriously think she broke her stuff to lure him over? To what? To seduce him? "I did no such thing, Rogers! You honestly think I would do something like this?"

"No, not really. It's not like you need a reason for me to come over..." He blushed a little bit. "But those weren't just accidents. This was deliberately."

"So someone broke in to loosen some bolts?" That sounded insane. Nothing was missing and she would have noticed if someone broke in. And who was stupid enough to break into her place? Maybe Clint but he was still in Florida with his family and Laura would never let him do something like this.

Steve suddenly shook his head. "I think I know who did this. I have to go." And with that he just left and she still had no clue who did this. She sighed and got more towels to clean up her bathroom. She hoped that Steve would tell her who was behind this so she could kick their ass.

He came back an hour later with flowers in his hands and now she was just confused. Did he break in to mess with her stuff? He handed her the flowers. "Those are from Bucky. He wanted to give them to you in person but he thinks that I should finally man up and tell you the truth.."

"Did you do this?"

"What?" His eyes went wide. "No! Bucky did!"

"What?"

"He said that he did it so you would call me for help and...and we would...I don't really wanna repeat his exact words but he hoped that you would show...your gratefulness for my help in your bedroom." Steve's face was completely red.

"He thought that I would bang you if you'd fixed my stuff?"

"Um, yes."

 _Men._ It seemed that Barnes had discovered porn. She rolled her eyes but then remembered something. "Why would he want us to have sex? And what truth does he want you to tell me?"

She didn't know how he did it but Steve got even more redder. Didn't she miss her window after all? Was he still interested? "I like you. I like you a lot." He looked really flustered. It was kind of cute. "In a romantic way."

"Yeah?"

"Um, yes. And I...And I never found the courage to ask you out because I wasn't completely sure if you liked me, too...and Buck got annoyed with me and came up with this stupid plan."

Well if anyone could break into her place without her noticing, it would be the Winter Soldier. "Steve?"

He was looking at his feet now and rubbing the back of his neck. He looked up. "Yeah?"

"Kiss me."

He started to smile. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

He stepped forward cupping her face and kissed her softly. She sighed into the kiss happy that it was finally happening. That _they_ were finally happening. And she found out later that day that Steve was a good handyman since the bed didn't break with them moving on top of it.

She put Barnes into a choke hold the next day and made him pay for her new dishes. He seemed to regret trying to set them up and living with Steve when he found out that she and Steve could be quite loud during the night and sometimes during the day. Neither she or Steve really cared about that though.

* * *

 _Updates are still going to be sporadic._


	59. I think I wanna marry you

_Steve tries to propose to Natasha but keeps getting interrupted._

* * *

He was nervous. In fact, he didn't think he had ever been more nervous in his life before and he was jumping out of planes without a parachute on a regular basis. Steve went into the kitchen to check on the roast beef he made and then went back into the living room to light on the candles on the dinner table. He patted his hand over his front pocket of his slacks and the small box was still there. He just hoped that Natasha would like the ring. And of course he prayed that she would say yes. He was going to ask her to marry him tonight. They had been together for two years now, living together for one and he thought that they were ready to take the next step. Natasha did say that there would never be someone else for her but he still was worried that she would say no. Maybe she wasn't ready or she didn't want to marry at all. They never specifically spoke about marriage before.

He never thought he would get to have this after he woke up. He had thought that Peggy had been his only chance and she had (rightfully) moved on and married someone else and had lived a long and happy life. He hadn't dreamed to get that too but then he had met Natasha and she had become his friend. And then he had fallen in love with her and she had become his family and _home_. He finally had a home. He knew that he would never love someone the way he loved Natasha. She was the love of his life and he hoped that he would be her husband one day.

The timer rang and he went into the kitchen to get the roast beef out of the oven and finished to set the table. A nice romantic dinner and then he would get on one knee and ask her. He had been thinking about the perfect proposal for weeks now. He knew that Natasha wasn't very romantic and he didn't want to make her uncomfortable with a giant proposal but he thought that a nice dinner at home was perfect for them.

He heard the front door open a few minutes later and tried to calm his nerves. He had to stay calm or he would just blurt out everything and ruin her proposal. Natasha deserved to have a perfect proposal.

"Steve?" Her voice came from the hallway.

"Living room!" He yelled back and took a deep breath. Just be cool, Steve. For once in your life be cool.

Natasha walked into the living room and smiled when she saw the table. "Oh, wow. I think I should spend the day with Pepper more often if I get greeted by this, babe."

He smiled and walked over to her cupping her face to kiss her before he ruined the surprise. Even though he kind of suspected that she knew that something was up. Natasha knew about _everything_ that was going on around her. He kissed her deeply and his chest fluttered when he heard her sigh happily into the kiss. "Hi, doll."

She smiled the smile she only had for him and then pecked his lips again. "What did you make? I'm starving!"

"Roast beef and mashed potatoes with Parmesan."

"Hm, my favorite!" She cupped his cheek and then walked towards the table. He pulled her chair out like he always did and then sat down as well. "You're so good to me, Steve."

Natasha complimented his food and told him about the meetings she had with Pepper today while eating dinner and sipping on her wine. He tried to listen to her but he couldn't stop thinking about the ring in his pocket and when the right moment was to ask her to spend the rest of her life with him.

She stole the last piece of roast beef from his plate and then sat back in her chair. "That was delicious, babe. Are you okay, though? You didn't eat that much-"

"I'm fine." He was going to ask her now. "There's actually something-" He stood up and Natasha's eyes widen. Did she already know?

"Oh fuck!" She jumped off the chair and walked past by him. What? What was going on? He turned around and saw what got her acting this way. A building a few blocks from their apartment was on fire. Their phones started to ring two seconds later and they both knew that it was time to suit up.

* * *

The next few weeks were filled with missions all around the globe and he barely saw Natasha, let alone found the time to ask her to marry him. And he didn't think popping the question on a helicarrier was very romantic.

He was more than pleasantly surprised when Natasha was packing their bags when he came home from Colombia and she announced that they would take the next days off to spend the weekend at a little cabin in Upstate New York. He knew it was her idea and trip but he thought that a cabin could be the perfect place for a proposal. He got the ring from its hidden spot and tugged it into his jacket when Natasha wasn't in the room.

He had problems to get out of his jacket without Natasha noticing the small box in his pocket because she was ripping his clothes off pretty much the moment they stepped into the cabin. He sneaked out of the bedroom after she fell asleep to hide the ring so she wouldn't find it before he could ask her. He only had to come up with the perfect moment to ask her. Maybe they could go star gazing. That was actually a good idea. What was more romantic than a sky full of stars?

Natasha didn't look very excited when he suggested it because it was getting colder now but she eventually said yes because she knew that he loved astronomy. He was pretty confident that she had no idea what he was going to do.

He did a bit of research and knew that there was a lake near by and he thought it would look spectacular reflecting the moon and stars. He was holding Natasha's hand helping her over trunks and branches on the ground since her eye sight wasn't as good as his in the dark.

"Wow, it's really pretty here." She admitted when they reached the lake. "It was a good idea."

He smiled and put the blanket on a big trunk so they could sit down. Natasha leaned her head on his shoulder and let him point out constellations. He knew that she already knew them but she also knew that he loved to talk about space and it was one of the reasons he loved her so much.

"Nat?"

She looked up at him. "Yes?"

"There's something-"

"Did you hear that?" She pulled her head away and looked around.

"Hear what?" He was trying to propose here!

"That!" She stood up and walked back into the forest and he followed her. Now he heard it, too. It sounded like some animal in pain.

"Oh my God! Look!" Natasha kneeled down. "I'm not gonna hurt you, okay? I just wanna help you."

He caught up with Nat and could see who she was talking to. A fawn was caught in a hunting trap with its leg and it looked pretty bad. Natasha came slower closer to the animal while assuring the deer that she was going to help it.

"The opening mechanism is jammed. I can't open it."

"I got it." He walked carefully closer to them to not startle the fawn. Any wrong movement could hurt it even worse. He pulled the trap with his hands apart and Nat quickly grabbed the deer and pulled it against her chest.

"We have to get him to a vet."

"Yeah. Let me get the blanket so we can keep him warm and then we'll go back. I think I saw a vet down the road near the cabin when we got here." He left to grab the blanket and they wrapped the fawn into it and then walked back to the cabin to drive to the nearest vet who examined the broken leg and promised to bring the animal to someone who knew how to take care of fawns.

* * *

He was starting to wonder if the universe was trying to tell him something. He had tried to propose two times now and he got interrupted both times. Was Natasha going to say no and that was the reason he never got the chance to ask her? No, he didn't think in that kinda stuff. He knew that Natasha loved him and he was positive that she wanted to be his wife one day.

He had managed to get tickets for the Bolshoi who were currently in town and surprised Natasha with it. He wanted to go to the ballet with her and then walk through Central Park to ask her to marry him and he prayed to anyone listening that he wouldn't get interrupted this time.

Natasha was still gushing about the performance when they were walking through Central Park with his arm around her shoulder to keep her warm. "Thank you for this, Steve."

He kissed the top of her head. "Anything for you, doll."

She snuggled closer to him. "I love you."

He stopped walked and turned her to face him. This was the moment now. "And I love you. And that's why-"

He didn't come any further because a bright beam suddenly appeared a few feet away from them and he quickly pulled Natasha behind him to protect her from whatever would come through that beam.

"Steve, chill!" Natasha sounded amused. "It's just-"

The beam was gone and Thor was suddenly standing before them. "Oh, hello my friends! I fear my brother escaped his prison and is on Earth."

Thor clearly wasn't listening when he had prayed that he wouldn't get interrupted this time.

They chased Loki around the globe until they found him in Iceland on a glacier _naked_ during some kind of weird ritual to summon some mystical force to overthrow his father. Maybe he didn't have to hit Loki _that_ hard with his shield but he was the reason Steve hadn't asked Natasha yet again to marry him, and besides Loki was a God, he could take it.

* * *

He decided to stop planning a proposal and to just ask her when the moment was right, so nothing could interfere with him asking again. He had bought the ring four fucking months ago! He had thought that they would be already planning their wedding by now!

It was Winter now and they spent most of their free time on their couch watching TV wrapped in blankets and drinking hot chocolate. Natasha was using him as her pillow (as usual) and they were watching some show on HGTV and he already knew that Natasha wanted to remodel their kitchen even though she couldn't cook.

"Steve?" She stopped the show and looked up at him biting her lip. "Do you wanna marry me?"

What? "You found the ring?"

Her eyes widened. "What ring?"

He tried to play dumb. "What?"

"You just mentioned a ring. Do you have an engagement ring, Steven Grant Rogers?" She raised her finger at him.

"Yes."

"Then why aren't you asking me?" Her face fell. "Oh, you changed your mind. I guess I can understand that."

"What? No! You have no idea how much I want to marry you!" And then he told her about the three times he had tried to propose to her.

She was smiling brightly and kissed him. "You're such a dork. Go get the ring!"

"Really?"

She nodded and he quickly left to get the ring and practically ran back with it into the living room. The apocalypse could start right now but this time he would ask her. Natasha was sitting on the couch beaming brightly and he knew that she would say yes.

He went down on one knee and opened the box to present the diamond ring. "Will you marry me, Natasha?"


	60. Undercover

_Steve and Natasha have to pretend to be a couple on their honeymoon to take out a HYDRA cell._

* * *

Steve was fidgeting beside her in his airline seat and Natasha put her hand briefly on his knee to calm him down. They were on their way to a resort in the Bahamas that HYDRA used for human trafficking and experiments. Fury sent them to pose as newlyweds on their honeymoon to take out the HYDRA cell. Undercover work was a piece of cake for her but Steve was not good at it. He hadn't been good at it at SHIELD and even after the whole debacle he was still bad at it. She was surprised that Fury chose Steve as her fake husband but she figured that it was easier to deal with HYDRA with Captain America as your sidekick.

"It's gonna be fine. Don't worry."

Steve looked at her hand on his knee, or rather at her engagement ring and wedding band, and nodded. "I know 'cause you're here."

She controlled her blush and gave him a small smile. She would take the fact that Steve Rogers could make her blush to her grave. She pulled her hand away and sipped on her champagne. Those next few days would be interesting. Steve hated undercover work and he was probably not happy that he had to pose as her husband. She figured that marriage was something sacred to him and here he was now as her fake husband with a wedding ring on his finger. But she had to hand it to Stark, he really knew how to pick jewelry. Her rings were beautiful and she really wanted to keep them after the job was finished. A girl could never have enough diamonds.

The pilot announced that they would land soon and she squeezed Steve's hand to assure him. They had left Steve and Natasha behind and were now Mr. and Mrs. Grant Matthews. She went with Natalie as her first name so Steve wouldn't get confused and could still call her Nat. She didn't want to make it too complicated for him. She had dyed her hair brunette when they still had been in Manhattan and Steve grew a beard and let his hair grow out a bit so he wouldn't be too recognizable. He looked incredibly hot with this look and she already knew that lots of women would hit on him even though he was her fake husband. Steve looked at her with a sweet smile and she ignored how something fluttered in her chest. She wondered how much of her affection for him in the next few days wasn't faked. It was her best kept secret but Natasha Romanoff was a goner when it came to Steve Rogers.

He turned his hand and intertwined their fingers. "Better get into the role, right?" He managed to look both confident and sheepish.

She nodded. "Right."

Maybe she would be the one who would have a hard time pretending to be a couple and not Steve.

* * *

Fury or probably Stark got them the honeymoon suite and she caught herself wishing that Steve would sleep in the big bed with her when he went straight to the couch in the living room of the suite. She knew that he would let her have the bed but she was really tempted to offer to share it with him but she wasn't so sure if that was something that he wanted. Or was comfortable with. He probably only wanted to share the bed with his _real_ wife or girlfriend and she wasn't either of those things. She told Steve that she wanted to take a shower while he went out to get their gear that one of Fury's many minions hid near by. There was no way that they would have gotten through TSA with Captain America's shield and her weapons. Steve was still gone when she came out of the bathroom ( that bathroom was incredible and clearly build for people to have sex in) and she decided to order room service after she had swiped the place for bugs. She ignored the warm flutter when the concierge on the phone called her Mrs. Matthews and had just rolled the tray with the food in when Steve came through the open balcony door. Thank God it was already late at night or they would have already been made. They hid the shield and weapons in the headboard of the bed so that the cleaning stuff wouldn't find them.

They sat down in the living room and discussed their plan over dinner. They would explore the resort tomorrow to find out where the backstage areas were. HYDRA lured people from poor countries with the promise of good work to this place and then sold them into slavery or sex work (HYDRA had to be financed somehow) if they weren't find worthy of their sick experiments. There were reports of missing employees but no one really seemed to care about poor non-white workers.

She wished Steve a good night and was about to go to her room but she had to tell him something. "I know this isn't your ideal mission but you can trust me, Steve."

He gave her a smile. "I know. If I get a wife, I'm glad it's you."

She didn't know what to make out of that statement. "Good night."

"Good night, Nat."

* * *

He knocked on at the bedroom door at 7 am and she told him to come in. She was already awake to hack into the servers of the hotel. Steve was already showered and dressed for the day while she was still in her camisole and shorts. She didn't miss how Steve's gaze landed briefly on her chest before he quickly looked back at her face.

"When do you wanna check out the resort?"

"Around 10, 11? It's way too soon to walk around this place right now without looking suspicious."

Steve frowned. "Why? Everyone's still asleep. No one will bother us."

"The guests are asleep. Not the staff." She closed her laptop and smirked. "We are two newlyweds. People will raise their eyebrows if we're already up."

"Why?"

God, he was so cute. "Steve, you do know that honeymoon basically just means having lots of sex, right? So we have to keep up the appearance that we are too worn out and sleeping or having morning sex. No newly married couple shows up at 7 am for breakfast."

Steve's whole face was red, it was adorable. "Right." He laughed uncomfortably. "Well, I've never been married before so..." He trailed off and left the bedroom. God, he was so cute sometimes. She was still smiling to herself while she continued to hack her way through the firewall. One hour later she had access to every computer at the resort and hoped that Stark would find something.

She got ready to spend the day as Steve's new wife and chose to wear a floral sundress and wear her brown hair in big waves. She slipped her rings on and stepped out of the bedroom into the living room where Steve was already ready and waiting for her.

"Ready, _husband_?"

His eyes traveled over her body. "You look very pretty, Nat. I mean you always do, of course. God, I don't know what I'm saying." He blushed a little and she took his hand and laced their fingers together.

"You're fine. You should complement me, that's good for our cover." She pulled him by his hand to the door. "You're doing great. I'm with you. It's just me."

Steve gave her a funny look. " _Just_ you. Right."

"You trust me, right?"

At this he smiled. "Yes. More than you'll ever know."

She felt all warm and fuzzy. Steve Rogers had that effect on her. It meant the world to her that he trusted her. "Okay, then follow my lead, _Grant_."

"Will do, Mrs. Matthews."

* * *

She kept count. Eleven women had hit on Steve while they were checking the perimeter. Eleven! And four of them were standing right next to their new husbands while flirting with her fake husband! Okay, she had eyes, he knew he looked fucking hot! And Steve, sweet Steve, got all flustered and looked at her for help and she didn't feel one bit sorry when she made not so subtle sexual innuendos and dragged him away. They found two staff entrances that were way too guarded for simple staff entrances and decided to come back later at night to take a better look.

They decided to take a break and have lunch at the restaurant at the beach and ordered lobster (Stark was paying after all).

"You okay, Grant?" She asked softly because she caught Steve staring at the ocean.

He blinked a few times before he looked at her. "Yes, of course. I just have never been on a vacation. It's really nice here."

"It is." She leaned forward and lowered her voice. "Look, we do get to have some free time. We can do some touristy stuff, if you want."

"Really?"

She smiled. "Of course. I have to show my husband a good time since we're not having sex." She winked and leaned back against her chair.

Steve's ears went pink and he coughed. God, she loved to tease him! And she was glad that he didn't know how often she thought about having sex with him or otherwise her ears would be red as well.

The waiter arrived with their lunch and congratulated them on their wedding when she casually mentioned it in hopes of free drinks. Unfortunately the elderly couple at the next table noticed how the waiter brought them free champagne and since Steve was a nice person the couple ended up sitting at their table asking them all kinds of questions about their relationship. She did go with Steve over the things they would say if people asked them private stuff and even posed with him for fake wedding pictures in case someone wanted to see them.

"How did you two meet?" Bill asked them after he had told them how he had charmed his wife Ellie when they had been in college.

"Work." She answered quickly before Steve said something wrong. "We work at the same company and then Grant finally asked me out after I gave him hundreds of signs that I was interested in him." She smiled affectionately at Steve. "Right, honey?"

"Yeah, I'm not very good at that."

Ellie laughed. "Well, now you don't have to anymore. Looks like you found the right one."

Steve looked at her with a little smile. "Yeah, looks like it."

"And how did you know that Nat was the one, Grant?" Ellie asked with big eyes. "My Bill said he knew after I chased him through our apartment with a spoon after he ate my last chocolate pudding."

Oh shit. They never came up with a story like that. Only how they met and how long they were together. Fuck! She wanted to come up with something but Steve was already speaking. "We were sitting on the living room floor playing UNO and she had already won six rounds and then the seventh round and she looked so happy and was laughing and I just knew. I'm really competitive and never back down from a challenge but I realized that I didn't mind losing to her. Never to her. Not as long as she is laughing so beautifully."

"Oh, that's so sweet!" Ellie gushed and she just stared at Steve. That wasn't a made up story. That had actually happened. She had wiped the floor with him and made fun of him and Steve had just smiled at her. She tried not to think too much about that and only on the fact that Steve seemed to get better at lying on the job.

"And when are you gonna have babies? You two would make so beautiful babies!" Ellie grinned. "I'm sure you are already practicing a lot!"

Oh, how she hated that topic. She couldn't get pregnant and she wasn't even sure if she really wanted kids. She just hated the fact that the Red Room took that choice away from her. Did Grant and Natalie Matthews want children? She realized that she and Steve hadn't worked enough on their background stories. Steve was again faster than her. "We don't want children." He smiled at her. "I'm selfish and don't want to share her with anyone."

Bill laughed. "That's probably a good idea. Our two boys are two shitheads!"

Ellie elbowed him. "William!"

"What? You know I'm right." Ellie just shrugged. Did Steve really not want kids or did he just say it because he knew that she was infertile?

Apparently old people needed their afternoon nap and Ellie and Bill thankfully left them after lunch. She had feared that they wanted to spend more time with her and Steve.

She decided that they could have a walk on the beach and check out the harbor at the same time. Steve looked happy when she suggested it and offered her his arm.

"Do you really not want kids?" She asked him while they walked on the beach towards the harbor.

He looked down at her. "I thought I wanted kids before the serum but then...I can't be _him_ and be a father and I want to help people. And I'm not even sure I wanted children before everything changed. It was just expected from you back then. Find a wife and then have kids. Do you want kids?"

"I don't know. It would just have been nice to have an actually say in the matter but no, I don't think so. I can't see myself settling down with 2.5 children and a dog. I love my job. I want to help people."

Steve wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "Nothing wrong with that."

"I guess so." She nodded her agreement even though she was surprised that he didn't want to have children. She always pictured him as the guy who wanted a family. Maybe she could make him happy after all...

* * *

They sneaked out of their suite after midnight to check out the two staff entrances that were heavily guarded. She had the suspicion that those were the places the human trafficking took place. They hid in the bushes near the first entrance to check out the perimeter. She didn't think it would get this cold during the nights and only wore dark jeans and a top. She should have taken a hoodie with her or something.

"Here, take this." Steve got out of his black hoodie and handed it to her. He was wearing a t-shirt underneath it.

She wanted to say that she didn't need it but she was really cold and she knew that Steve wouldn't consider her as weak. "Thanks."

He smiled at her and she quickly slipped his hoodie on trying her hardest not to smell the fabric. They waited for some time and then there was finally movement. Three heavily armed guards escorted four young women and two boys out of the building. Their mouths were duc-taped and they were crying. Steve got tense next to her and she knew that he was seconds away from jumping out of the bushes to help them.

"Don't. We don't have enough yet. I'll inform the Coast Guard so they can save them." She pulled her phone out of her pants to do so.

Steve's jaw was still clenched but he nodded. "Okay."

"Let's follow them."

They followed the group to the harbor where even more tied up people were being dragged onto the cruise ships of the resort. She quickly let Fury know so he could alert the authorities. Steve shifted his foot and a twig cracked underneath him. He looked at her with wide eyes and flashlights were coming towards them. They couldn't be made yet, they still didn't know how big this whole thing was.

She grabbed Steve's hand and pulled him further into the little palm forest near the harbor until her back was against one of the palm trees. "I'm sorry, Steve." She whispered cupping his face and crashing her lips against his before he could say anything. He froze for a moment but then he kissed her back. And oh boy, did he kiss her back. This wasn't the first time they kissed for cover but the kiss on the escalator had been just a quick peck and this was...so much more. Steve's tongue pushed into her mouth and and she jumped up to wrap her legs around his waist. She barely noticed how one guard came closer to them, she could only focus on Steve and the way he kissed her. Her whole body was on fire.

"It's just one of those honeymoon couples doing it against a tree." The guard laughed and walked away.

She tried to pull away even though she didn't really want to but Steve made a tiny growl and kissed her harder. She was pretty sure she was seconds away from melting. She never wanted to stop kissing him but she knew this wasn't real. Steve just got caught up, who knew when had been the last time he got to really kiss someone since he never went out with any of the girls she suggested.

"Steve." She half whispered and moaned when one of his hands slipped underneath top. "Steve, they're gone. You can stop."

His hand stopped caressing the skin on her stomach and he looked at her with wide eyes. "Oh God, I am so sorry, Nat!" He let go of her and she ungracefully landed on her feet because she hadn't thought that he would just drop her. "I am so so sorry."

"It's okay. I'm the one who initiated this. Don't worry. And it worked. They didn't catch us. We're not made."

"Yeah, right." It looked like he wanted to touch his lips but then stopped halfway. "It was just...for show."

Her phone vibrated and Fury texted her that the Coast Guard was waiting for the cruise ship to save the people. She told Steve and they walked to their suite in silence. He looked somehow haunted when he wished her a good night and she hated herself for making Steve so uncomfortable. She should have come up with a better plan than making out with him. That ruse worked 99,9% of the time but of course Steve wouldn't be really on board with something like this. Kissing meant something to him and even though this kiss meant something to her, she didn't think it was the same for him.

* * *

She was more than surprised when she woke up the next morning and Fury was standing in the living room talking to Steve.

"How nice of you to join us, Romanoff."

"What are you doing here, Nick?"

"Your op is over. FBI decided to storm the place with local authorities last night. I'm surprised you two slept through that. You can go home."

 _Oh._ Well that had been quick but if the FBI though it was the right strategy...She was actually a bit sad that the whole mission was already over. She had really looked forward to be just tourists. Steve looked a bit upset as well.

"Pack your bags. Jet leaves in half an hour with or without you two." Fury announced and then left. She quickly wondered if they could just stay here but the whole resort was probably getting shut down right now. She gave Steve a quick smile before she went back to the bedroom to pack her suitcase. Steve was already waiting for her when she came back into the living room.

She noticed that he was still wearing his wedding ring while she had already taken her rings off. It had felt weird but it had been the right decision. None was this had been real.

"Steve, your ring."

"Huh?" He looked at his hand and nodded. "Right." He took the ring off and shoved it into the pocket of his shorts. "Let's go."

"You know, I'm sure you can get a few days off for a real vacation." She said to him while they walked to the jet. "Even Captain America is allowed to take a few days off."

"Yeah. I don't really want to go on a vacation alone though." He gave her a small smile.

"Maybe Sam will go with you."

His face fell. "Sam. Right."

* * *

She only realized when she was back at her apartment in Manhattan that maybe Steve wanted to go on a vacation with _her._ A real one where they were Steve and Natasha and not somebody else. And there had been signs that Steve could be interested in her, _romantically._

She decided to take a leap of faith and do something crazy. She had to call in a few favors and owe new ones (and the smirk on Tony's face told her that he would have a field day with cashing his favors in) but she didn't care. She was trying to be romantic here.

She stopped at Barneys for a quick shopping trip and then drove to the private airport where Steve and one of SI private jets were waiting for her.

"What is this new mission?" Steve asked her when she got out of the car. Steve had only a duffel bag and his shield with him and she was glad that she had gone shopping for him. "Your text was a bit cryptic."

"Wouldn't you like to know?" She got the suitcases out of her trunk and handed them over to the steward. "We're going on a vacation!"

"Another honeymoon mission?"

"No, we're going on an actual vacation. A real one. You and me!" She smiled excitedly while Steve was just staring at her. Had this been a bad idea? "We don't have-"

Steve started to smile. "Really?"

She nodded dumbly. "I hope that's okay?"

"It's more than okay, Nat!" He was practically beaming at her and her butterflies were dancing.

"I only booked one suite and I was hoping you won't sleep on the couch this time." She was biting her lower lip hoping that he would get what she really meant.

And it looked like he did. "Are you sure about that?"

"Yes."

His smile got somehow brighter and then he cupped her face and kissed her softly. "You have no idea how happy that makes me."

* * *

 ** _This is the last one shot for this series. I have no plans for new content whether it's a one shot or a new story._**


	61. Steeb

_Natasha and Steve just started dating when Natasha gets the flu and she tries to hide it from Steve._

* * *

Natasha took pride in being independent. She didn't need anyone for anything. Depending on others made her weak and she would never be weak. She couldn't be weak. Not now when she had someone else to look after and to protect. She was still new to the whole dating thing and probably already made tons of mistakes but she had to admit that dating Steve was the greatest thing that could have happened to her. It had taken her years until she had been ready to let him in but now that she was with him and secretly calling him her boyfriend, she had to admit that she was very happy. Steve made her happy and she hoped that he felt the same way about her.

Steve wanted to take her to an art gallery tonight (and she had been hoping that he would spend the night with her for the first time) but she had to cancel. She had a fever, stuffy nose and she just felt like she was on the brink of death. She barely got sick thanks to her serum but some viruses managed to get past her immune system and here she was now with the fucking flu on the day she had been hoping to sleep with Steve for the first time. But _no,_ she had to get sick! Why did she even get a bikini wax yesterday?!

She dragged herself from her bed into the kitchen to make tea and check if she had any meds at home. She only found Tylenol but that would have to do for now. Couldn't you order medicine online now? She groaned and swallowed the pills with a big gulp of water. That would mean that she would have to go to the living room to get her laptop. And her legs were acing! She took her cup of tea and walked back into the bedroom remembering that she could also order from her Starkphone. Really, this flu seemed to make her a bit stupid. She ordered cough syrup, drops for her sore throat and nasal spray before she searched for a place that delivered chicken soup. The whole ordeal only took five minutes but she was exhausted. She just wanted to sleep but she remembered that she had to cancel her date with Steve.

What was she supposed to text him? She couldn't just tell him that she was sick. She didn't want him to feel like he had to come over to take care of her. No, she didn't want that and she didn't _need_ that. She would never be a burden to anyone and especially not to someone that meant so much to her like Steve.

She finished her tea and opened her conversation with Steve.

 _Hi, Steve. I'm sorry but I can't make it tonight:( Something came up. Rain check?_

She only had to wait a few minutes for a reply.

 _Oh, that's too bad. Can I pick you up tomorrow morning for breakfast? There's this little cafe I found that I really think you'd like it._

Damn him for being so sweet! There was no way that she was flu free tomorrow! She really wanted to see him but she couldn't. Not like this. No one was supposed to see her like _this_. Weak and vulnerable. Pathetic.

 _I'll be off the grid for a few days. I have to do something for Fury. I'll call you when I'm back._

 _Ok. Be safe!_

She felt bad for lying to him but she was too exhausted to dwell on it too much. She fell asleep and only woke up when the delivery boy rang her bell.

* * *

She slept through the whole day but barely got any sleep during the night. She was either too hot or too cold and she had coughing fits that shook her entire body. She barely got any oxygen through her nose and her throat was fucking killing her. She gave up on trying to get any sleep around three am and moved with her blankets onto the couch where she watched Disney movies until she fell asleep again.

The door bell ringing and loud knocking on her door woke her up. Who the fuck was that? She would kill them right on the spot! She finally was sleeping and than this motherfu-

"Natasha? Are you home?"

Fuck! That was definitely Steve's voice! Fuck! She pulled her blankets over her head praying that he would just go away. Why was he even here? She had texted him that she would be away for a few days!

"I ran into Fury at the Tower this morning and he said that he had no idea where you are. Are you at home? Nat?"

Ah, Fury that fucker! Couldn't he have lied? Was that too much to ask? Should she just wait until Steve would leave? Or would he kick the- A coughing fit interrupted her train of though.

"Nat? Is that you?"

She tried to stop coughing but she just couldn't. Damnit! She wrapped her blanket around her shoulders and walked to the front door. "Yeah." She creaked out. God, her voice sounded terrible! "Everything's fine. Just go, Steeb."

"Steeb?" He had the audacity to laugh! "Who's Steeb? Natasha, are you...are you sick?"

"No!" She said but her body betrayed her and she started to cough again followed by a loud sneeze. Oh, that was just fucking great.

"Sure sounds like it." He quipped and she wanted to punch him! She was basically dying here and he thought it was amusing?! She couldn't believe that she had considered to sleep with him only twenty four hours ago.

"Natasha?" He knocked on the door again. "Natasha, sweetheart please let me in. I can hear you having trouble breathing through the door."

If there was one person to rival Steve's stubbornness, it was most definitely her. "No. I don't need you. You can go."

She could hear him sigh through the door. "Sweetheart, please open the door. I just wanna see that you're okay. I worry about you. I don't even care that you lied to me. I just wanna make sure that you're okay. Please, sweetheart."

She would never _ever_ admit to anyone that it was the fact that he called her _sweetheart_ with _so much_ affection in his voice that she opened the door a bit. The flu clearly dulled her edge because one second the door was only opened enough to poke her head through and then the next second Steve was suddenly standing in her hallway, the door closed. How the fuck did that happen?

"See? I'm okay, Steeb. You can go now."

"Sure. And that's why you can't even say my name correctly and no offence, but you don't look so good." He pressed his hand against her forehead before she could move away. "Jesus, Nat! You're burning up! Did you go to a doctor?"

"No! No doctor!" She shook her head which she shouldn't have done because it made her head hurt even worse.

Steve looked disappointed but didn't pressure her. "Okay. What do you have here? Do you have a thermometer? Are you checking your temperature regularly? Did you make yourself cold calf wraps to get your fever down?"

"No." She answered quietly. "But I'b ordered cough syrup and stuff yesterday. I hab' Tylenol. That helps with feber, right?"

Steve wrapped the blanket around her shoulders tighter before he picked her up bridal style. She wanted to object but he glared at her. "You're going back to bed. Then I'm making you calf wraps and you'll try to get some sleep while I get you a thermometer and the ingredients for my ma's chicken soup."

"Steeb, I don't-"

"Can it, Romanoff!" He gently laid her on the bed and covered her with the blanket. "I'll be right back with your wraps."

She was dozing off when something wet and cold touched her leg. "What the fuc-" She tried to kick her attacker but Steve easily caught her leg.

"I know it's uncomfortable but it helped me tons of times when I was a kid, okay?" He wrapped a cold and wet towel around her right calf before doing the same to her left. "Try to get some sleep. I'll be back as soon as possible."

She wanted to tell him to just leave but something in his eyes made her stop. He didn't really looked bothered by the whole thing. "Okay." She mumbled out and Steve smiled and bent down to kiss her forehead.

* * *

She woke up to something getting gently shoved into her ear. She started to panic until she heard Steve's voice.

"Shh, it's just a thermometer, sweetheart." It beeped and he removed it from her ear. "101, 84." He sounded unhappy." Let's hope it goes down soon." She knew that he would take her to a doctor if it didn't. "The soup is not done yet but do you want something to drink? I got you Gatorade, you need the electrolytes."

She nodded and he quickly left to get her the drink. She looked over to her nightstand and saw that it was covered in cold medicine and fashion magazines. He even got her a new book! She was smiling to herself when he came back into the bedroom.

He handed her the Gatorade and sat down on the edge of her bed. "Nat, why didn't you just tell me that you were sick?"

She almost emptied the whole bottle before she handed it back to him. God, that felt good. Steve looked at her with questioning eyes. Right, he asked her something. "I didn't want to burden you."

"What? You-"

"I don't want to be a burden. I don't want to rely on someone. I can't be weak." A cough interrupted her. "I know I probably don't make any sense to you but I can't just go to someone and ask them for help. I can't ask someone to take care of me."

"You took care of me when I got shot a couple of weeks ago. You took care of me. Why don't you want me-"

"That's different."

Steve frowned. "How? You think I don't want to?"

"No, Steeb! Ste-eeb. Steeb! Goddamnit! I can't eben say your name! I don't deserb to hab someone take care of me! I got weak and I deserb to get punished!" Her face got hot and it had nothing to do with her fever.

"What? That doesn't make any sense! Nat, everyone gets sick sometimes! Hell, I was sick all the time before the serum! You don't deserve punishment just because you caught the flu!"

"You don't understand!" She yelled and she ended up in another coughing fit.

Steve handed her a tissue. "Then help me understand. I can't shake the feeling that there's more to this. Are you ashamed that you got sick?"

"Yes. No." She blew her nose and threw the tissue into the trash can next to her night stand. "Look, sickness is a weakness. And when you're weak, you're pathetic and useless. When a girl got sick in the Red Room and she didn't get better in a few days...Oksana was a year younger than me, I think. So she had to be nine. She got really, really sick. Looking back I think she had pneumonia. It was getting worse and worse and normal people would hab taken her to the hospital but they... They called it _natural selection_ and killed her in front of us."

If she closed her eyes, she could still see Oksana's sweet face. A tear was running down her cheek and Steve wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against his chest. "I'm so sorry, Nat. I am so sorry for what they did to you. And your friend. I get it now."

He let her cry for Oksana and their lost childhoods until she was too tired and fell asleep in his arms. She woke up alone in her room and she was scared that Steve had left. Did he finally realize how fucked up she was and decided that he couldn't do this. Couldn't be with her?

"Steeb?" She creaked out and had to blow her nose again.

She sighed in relief when he was in her bedroom seconds later. "Do you need anything?"

"I thought you left." She murmured quietly and felt suddenly very small.

"Never." Steve said with so much conviction that she had to smile a little bit. "Are you hungry? The soup's ready." She nodded and he left to get back to the kitchen.

The soup tasted heavenly and Steve seemed more than relived when he took her temperature again and saw that it was sinking. He came back into the bedroom after he brought her empty bowl back into the kitchen.

"Do you need anything else, sweetheart?"

"Um...do you..." God, why was this so hard for her? She patted the empty spot next to her hoping he would get what she wanted from him. He smiled softly at her and got out of his shoes and jeans. She had really pictured them sharing a bed for the first time _very_ differently. He got under the blankets and she snuggled almost hesitantly against his chest. He wrapped his arm around her and pulled her closer before kissing the top of her head.

"I want you to know that you never have to feel ashamed because you think you're weak. You're not, Nat. You look after me and I look after you. I would never leave you behind or decide that you're pathetic. You could never be anything else than be strong, powerful and beautiful."

"Eben with a runny and red nose?" She joked and snuggled closer to soak up his warmth.

" _Eben_ then." He laughed.

"So you would kiss me right now? Eben though I hab the flu?" She teased and looked up at him. "It's not like you could get sick."

He laughed and cupped her cheek with his big hand. "I let you in on a small secret. I always want to kiss you, Nat." Her pink cheeks had nothing to do with the flu and everything with Steve and she couldn't help but smile when he kissed her softly.


	62. It's a mad, mad world

_Pictures of Steve and Natasha are being published and the media goes crazy_

* * *

Natasha never really cared about her birthdays. They didn't really have a meaning when you didn't age and she didn't even know if it was her real birthday. It was just a date and year that Fury had chosen when she'd joined SHIELD. Birthdays didn't mean anything to her but she had to admit that it had been very sweet when Steve'd showed up at her doorstep and invited her to the ballet. _You only turn 90 once, Nat._

They'd had dinner and then went to Lincoln Center to watch Swan Lake. It hadn't been the Bolshoi but it had still been a wonderful performance. Steve'd walked her back home and she'd had her arm looped through his and listened to him gush over the show. It had pleased her immensely that he'd liked it, most of her friends (not that she had many) didn't really care for ballet. She'd ignored what she'd really wanted and just kissed his cheek before she'd walked up the stairs and into her building.

Because of the incredible night she'd had, she woke up with a great mood this morning and was actually kind of looking forward to the party Pepper was throwing in her honor this weekend. Maybe Steve would dance with her... She sat up and drank some from the glass of water on her nightstand. She put the glass back and picked up her phone. Her eyes widening when she saw that she had several missed calls from Steve, Laura, Pepper and Hill. What? Her birthday had been yesterday and they'd all congratulated her already! Oh God, did something happen? She got a text from Pepper in that moment to turn her TV on and call her back. Natasha got out of bed and quickly ran into her living room. She had to search for the remote but found it under her sofa. She turned the TV on and almost dropped the remote.

There on the screen were her and Steve walking through Central Park with their arms intertwined. _Captain America and Black Widow dating?_ was written underneath the pictures. Why on earth was _CNN_ reporting this? Anderson Cooper almost looked like he didn't want to cover this and she felt his discomfort. Her and Steve weren't even dating! They were just friends! She zapped through the channels and it looked like everyone was reporting about their love affair which again wasn't one! Most shows were a bit hesitant to bash her but of course Fox News wasn't. Sean Hannity was pretty much calling her a cunt without actually saying the word but he seemed outraged by the fact that a Russian spy and slut (he didn't say it but it was implied) was with America's golden boy.

Natasha zapped through the channels until she landed on The View. The hosts were of course talking about her and Steve. They were nicer but they still all seemed shocked that Captain America would date someone like _her_. Someone unworthy and dirty.

Her phone buzzed and she saw that Steve was calling her. There was no way that he had no clue about the whole mess. She couldn't bring herself to answer it. She felt really bad for him. She didn't care about what they said about her but it was also his reputation on the line. The phone stopped buzzing and she turned the TV off.

She leaned back against the cushions on her couch and took a deep breath. God, what was she supposed to do? Deny the whole thing of course and hope that Steve's image didn't get damaged too much. She probably had to take a shower and then get to the Tower to face the whole mess. Pepper and Hill were probably waiting for her. They'd definitely already talked to Steve, so why wasn't there already a statement out explaining that they weren't an item?

A knock on her door startled her and she briefly wondered if the press somehow found her address out but that was impossible. There was another knock and then a voice she knew all too well.

"Nat? Are you home?" Steve asked and she was tempted to just sit quietly on her couch until he was gone. "Can you please let me in?"

She didn't want to, but she got up and walked to her front door. She opened it and Steve looked both relieved and guilty. "Thank God, you're okay. I was worried when you didn't answer our calls."

"I was asleep."

He nodded. "So...You probably know by now what happened?"

"Yeah...I'm sorry they are dragging you through the mud, Steve."

"What?" Steve shook his head. "I don't care about that. But it makes me furious that they say these terrible things about you. I'm sorry. They are all assholes. And I'm sorry I didn't realize someone was taking photos of us."

"What's done is done." God, she hated it that he thought that it was his fault. "Did you already talk to Pepper and Hill? Explain that it wasn't a date? Is a statement already written?"

She didn't notice that they were still standing by her door until Steve let himself in and walked past by her. "I don't want to issue a statement. Well, I do want to tell them to go fuck themselves."

"What?"

Steve looked almost angry but she knew that his anger wasn't directed at her. "You think I'll tell the world we're not together after what they said about you? They just think that their horrible and false assumptions about you are true and that's why we're not dating. No! I won't give them that!"

"So you don't want to say anything about this? Just sit this one out? Steve, you're Captain America for Christ's sake! People look up to you! They'll think less of you if you let them believe that you're dating me!"

"So what? I've never cared what people think about me and I am not better than you! Let them think that we're dating! I definitely don't mind!"

What on earth was that supposed to mean? "Steve, you're never gonna find a girlfriend if everyone thinks you're with me!"

Something flickered over Steve's face but she couldn't quite read it. "Good."

* * *

Pepper and Hill were surprised that Steve didn't want SI to issue a statement to clarify things but Pepper almost seemed pleased by it. Tony had a field day with the whole mess and only stopped talking after Natasha threw a knife at him "missing" his head by a few inches. Laura sounded really disappointed when she called her back to explain that she and Steve were not a couple. Natasha caught herself sharing the sentiment. Steve would make an excellent boyfriend. She could almost understand why women in America and around the globe were mad at her for landing him which she didn't! He was such a sweetheart and would probably not complain if his girlfriend would send him to the store to get her tampons. No, he would do it and probably buy her also lots of candy. He was probably very affectionate and great in bed...Okay, woah! What the fuck! She couldn't think about her friend like that!

She'd hoped that the whole thing would die down if they wouldn't address it but the _whole world_ was still obsessed with them. Gossip magazines had whole special issues about them and she'd heard from Pepper that they offered a ton of money for interviews. They were the number one topic in talk shows and on late night. Only John Oliver asked why the fuck everyone cared about that and then talked about institutional racism. She knew she liked that guy!

She checked a few gossip sites online and every single one of them had _exclusive knowledge_ about her and Steve. Everything in these articles was completely made up and she wondered if the writers had come up with it themselves or if someone contacted them with the claim that they knew her and Steve. Just the headlines were ridiculous!

 _Falling in love at first sight! The Cold War is finally over!_

 _Find out how the soldier fell in love with the spy!_

 _Widow is pregnant with twins!_

 _Take a look inside their multi million dollar ranch in Colorado!_

 _When is Cap gonna pop the question? We know the answer!_

Fox News was convinced that she was still working for the Russians and would slit Steve's throat during the night after she seduced him. Every news outlet seemed to go through the files about her that she'd dumped on the internet when SHIELD had fallen but some people were even defending her which surprised her. They said that she had proven her loyalty to the US and helped save the world a few times. Not that she cared what others thought about her but it was nice to read those comments.

She avoided Steve mostly and was grateful that the Avengers didn't need to assemble. Were the bad guys too busy reading gossip blogs to cause trouble? Natasha asked Pepper to cancel her birthday party because she was in no mood to answer any questions about her and Steve. Not there was a lot to tell, they were just friends!

She had just been done using the gym at the Tower and was in the locker room to use the showers before she would head home. So far she hadn't run into Steve today and she hoped it would stay that way. She was just about to go to the showers when she heard voices.

"You really think they're a couple?" One female voice asked.

"I think so. No one's talking about it but I mean I always see them together here at the Tower! And he always makes hearteyes at her!" Another voice said, almost sounding bitter. Who were they talking about? Her and Steve?! No, they had to talk about someone else, Steve didn't make hearteyes at her! "I thought working as Hill's assistant would give me access to Captain America's pants but looks like Romanoff got that before me!"

Oh God, they _were_ talking about her and Steve! Was she not save from the gossip anywhere?! And who had known that Hill's quiet and shy assistant wanted to bang Steve? She wanted to snicker but she couldn't risk the women hearing her.

"God, I wish I was Romanoff!" Hill's assistant said. "I bet he's great in the sack! She's probably getting orgasms daily! I bet he's like getting ordered around in bed!"

Jesus! Hill's assistant seemed to think about Steve quite a lot! "And here I thought you were a prude, Daphne!" The other woman laughed. "She's probably just using him for sex. I bet he thinks it's love." Natasha gritted her teeth. That wasn't fair! She would _never_ do something like to him. "Well, once she breaks his heart, there will be a lot of willing people to comfort him."

"Oh yes!" Daphne giggled. "I'll comfort him anyway he wants me to!" The two women continued talking but their voices got quieter and she heard them leaving the locker room. Natasha knew that most people thought like these two but it was different to hear it from people who she kind of worked with. People who had seen her and Steve together. Hill's assistant was at almost every team meeting and she was probably imagining Steve banging her on the conference table and she wanted to comfort him once Natasha broke his heart. Not that she could break it since they weren't even a couple!

Things got even worse when Steve ran into Sean Hannity and punched him in the face telling him to stop talking about her on his show. Hannity did so, but now everyone was even more convinced that she and Steve were a couple and Steve had been defending her honor. _Great_!

* * *

Oh God, oh God! What had she done!? She couldn't believe that she actually...Oh God!

What the fuck was wrong with her!

She ran down the stairs of her apartment building and hailed a cab. The cab driver didn't look twice at her outfit and she told him to drive to Queens. She had a safe house there and she could collect her thoughts there. She leaned back into the seat and caught a sniff of Steve's smell from his Henley that she was wearing. As soon as his smell hit her, it reminded her of what had happend last night.

Steve had showed up at her door wanting to know why she was avoiding him and then...She didn't really remember what they'd said about the whole Hannity thing but at one point they started ripping each other's clothes off and ended in her bed. She pressed her thighs together remembering how amazing sleeping with him had been. Nothing had ever felt this good and natural, but she'd freaked out this morning when she'd woken up with his chest pressed against her back and got back into her jeans from yesterday that she'd found on her dresser and picked his Henley up from the back of her couch before she slipped into sneakers and grabbed her backpack. She'd had sex with _Steve_. She'd slept with her friend. With her _best friend_. What the fuck had she been thinking? Well, not much after he'd cupped her face and kissed her. What the fuck had _he_ been thinking? Why the fuck had he kissed her and undressed her? Why had he slept with her? She always thought that he was the romantic kind and then he'd had sex with his friend?

She paid the driver and walked to her safe house. She got inside and took a deep breath. Was her friendship with Steve over? Sex only complicated things! She couldn't lose him! He meant the world to her! She bit her lip thinking about the way he had looked at her and whispered her name while they had been moving as one. She realized with a shock that she wanted to sleep with him again. _No, that was bad_. Her phone started ringing and she knew without checking who was calling her. It stopped but after a few minutes it rang again. This time she did check her phone and she was right. Steve was calling her. He hung up but she got a text seconds later.

 _Are you okay?_

And she could see that he was still typing.

 _I don't regret last night. Do you?_

He didn't? Another text appeared.

 _You don't have to answer that. Just tell me if you're okay._

She leaned back against the wall and closed her eyes. Did she regret them having sex? Did _he_ want to sleep with her again? Did he have feelings for her? Did _she_ have feelings for him? Her phone beeped.

 _Nat?_

She took a deep breath and started typing.

 _I'm okay and safe._

She locked her screen and shoved the phone back into her backpack. She spent the day lying on her couch thinking about her and Steve. Sleeping with him had felt completely different than sleeping with any other man before. She wondered if last night could qualify as lovemaking. She loved Steve. She knew that. She always thought that she loved him in the way she loved Clint but she'd never slept with Clint and just the thought made her nauseous. _Yuck!_

Did all the gossip from the last weeks bother her so much because it hit too close to home? Because she knew that she was not good enough for him? That she could never be his girlfriend? That no one would approve of them because they knew that she wasn't the right one for Steve?

She had to be a grown up and talk to Steve, didn't she? She fished her phone out of her backpack and texted Steve the address of her safe house.

 _Can you come over? I think we need to talk._

His reply came almost immediately.

 _On my way._

* * *

 _Dear Gossips,_

 _remember how shocked and surprised we all were last year when the bomb dropped that Captain America and Black Widow were supposedly a thing? Well, brace yourselves because several people saw Cap and Widow getting a marriage license at a courthouse in Brooklyn this week! Looks like Captain Perfect is officially off the market:( What are we gonna call them? CapWidow? Romanogers? Write your suggestions in the comments!_

* * *

After both Pepper and Hill were sick of getting bombarded with calls and emails from news outlets around the world, they all agreed to release a statement.

 _Stark Industries can confirm that Captain Rogers and Agent Romanoff married this summer in a private ceremony. We ask to respect the couples' privacy and we won't be answering any questions regarding the Avengers' private lives in the future._


	63. Hi

_It's 1944 and Steve meets a mysterious redhead at a bar in London and is immediately drawn to her._

* * *

 _1944_

Steve almost felt guilty that he and Bucky had the evening off while brave soldiers fought on continental Europe to defeat Nazi Germany and Hydra, but it was also nice to have some drinks with his best friend after all the craziness of the last months. He was just glad that Buck was okay and looking forward to fight by his side. Just the way he always wanted it. He could finally serve his country.

Buck had chosen a bar and he followed him through the dark streets of London. It was already late and most people were at home or already in bars. Since May London was safe and people could continue with their lives. It was almost hard to imagine that there was a war in continental Europe. Steve planned to enjoy this night because they had no idea what would happen once they returned to Europe.

"Unbelievable." Bucky muttered next to him and Steve looked at him.

"What?"

"Those girls over there?" He pointed behind them at a group of young women who smiled when he looked at them. "They're not even looking at me! It's like I don't exist!"

Steve chuckled and shook his head in amusement. He hadn't thought about it when he'd agreed to do project Rebirth but it was nice that women were now looking at him, but then he remembered that they would have probably ignored him if he still looked like his old self. "Welcome to my old world."

"Yeah, yeah." Bucky grunted. "Once we're back home, _you_ have to find me dates! But we're never double dating! I don't think my ego could take that."

 _Home_. God, he would be like _this_ for the rest of his life. He could make it to thirty, go back to art school after the war. Maybe find a nice girl and marry her. There were so many possibilities for him now. But first he would make sure that he would earn that chance of a new future.

Bucky opened the door of the bar and Steve followed him inside. The bar was dark and full of smoke but it still was inviting. A few groups were sitting around tables but there weren't a lot of people here. He almost preferred it that way. Large crowds now reminded him of his show monkey days. He was just glad that Bucky hadn't seen him on stage. He would have never let him live that down.

They went to the counter and ordered two whiskeys. The bartender didn't have much to do and almost immediately gave them their order.

Steve raised his glass. "You ready to follow Captain America into the jaws of death?" He asked, half joking half serious. They had no idea what was waiting for them. And now it was his responsibility and duty to lead a group of brave and honorable men into combat.

"Hell no." Bucky chuckled. "That little boy from Brooklyn who was too dumb not to run from a fight- I'm following _him_."

He nodded and took a sip from his whiskey. It was good to know that Bucky still saw him just as Steve and not...not this _persona_. He just wanted to do what was right and was eternally grateful that he finally got the chance.

Steve looked over to the other side of the bar where a redheaded woman was sitting. She smirked and raised her martini glass before she looked away. He knew that he was blushing and stared into his whiskey.

"What's so interesting down there?" Bucky asked.

"Nothing." He looked up and judging by the knowing grin on his best friend's face he still had a pink face.

"Oh, I know that look. Did you see a pretty dame?" Bucky looked around until his gaze landed on the redhead. God, she was truly a vision. He wondered what her voice sounded like. He wanted to know her eye color because he couldn't tell from where he was sitting if her eyes were blue or green.

"Wow." Bucky whistled. "Who knew that the Brits had so swell gals!"

Did the woman hear Bucky because she looked into their direction again with a smirk on her beautiful face. God, she really had to be the most gorgeous girl he'd ever seen. Her smirk turned into a real smile when she looked directly at him. He couldn't help but smile back.

Bucky huffed. "Great another woman who pays no attention to me! I almost miss the days where you were a just a little punk. Now it's like I'm invisible!"

He couldn't really feel sorry for Bucky, not when the redhead was still looking at him. And she didn't just look at him like the chorus girls or the women who'd come to the shows, no it was almost like she _truly_ saw him. God, what was wrong with him? He didn't know the woman!

She stood up taking her drink with her and then she actually walked over. Bucky mumbled something under his breath and left him to go a table. The redhead was now standing next to him.

"Hi." She placed her drink next to his. God, her voice was so smooth and husky!

"Ma'am." He managed to get out and wished that the serum didn't just make him taller, but also gave him the ability to talk to women.

She seemed amused and pointed at the bar stool. "Can I join you?"

"Of course." He nodded and wanted to pull it out for her but she was faster.

"So you're a soldier, huh?" She said while she eyed his body and uniform.

"Yes, ma'am."

"Don't _ma'am_ me, I've just turned 20." She laughed and her laugh was beautiful.

"Sorry, ma-. Sorry. I'm Steve Rogers."

"Natalia." She said smoothly and held her hand out. He took it and her skin was soft. He probably held her hand longer than was socially acceptable and almost dropped it when he'd realized it. She chuckled and let her hands fall into her lap. She was wearing a dark green dress that accentuated the color of her hair perfectly and it clung nicely to her body. Not that he noticed that. And he finally knew her eye color. They were green, the prettiest green he'd ever seen since the serum had fixed his color blindness. "Last night before you're shipped off?"

"Something like that."

"Am I bothering you? I feel like I chased your friend away."

He looked for Bucky who was talking to a pretty blonde. "I think he's fine. And no, you're not bothering me." He wondered where she was from because her accent didn't sound British but it didn't sound completely American as well. "What brings you to London, Miss? If you don't mind me asking?"

"My family sent me to London since it seems safe now." She answered before taking a sip from her martini. "I'm from Russia though, if that's what you're asking. But I haven't been there in years."

"Your accent-"

"Yeah, my mother was American. She always spoke English with me. Have you ever been to Europe before?"

"No." He laughed. "I could have never afforded it. I always wanted to come though...I wish circumstances were different..."

"Yeah." She nodded. "War seems so idiotic. Regimes fall everyday. Just look at my country and what happend to the house of Romanov. The Nazis will learn that lesson as well. Nothing lasts forever."

The way she talked...she almost seemed sad. "Are you all alone here in London?"

She raised an eyebrow. "Why are you asking? You're trying to abduct me?"

"What? No!"

She laughed. "I was just kidding. Yes, it's just me. I kinda like it though. It's the first time I'm _really_ on my own." Her beautiful eyes appeared to be clouded for a second. "The house was quite full and strict that I grew up in. Where are you from? America is quite big, isn't it?"

"Brooklyn, New York. Born and raised." He said, proudly.

"You always wanted to be a soldier? Risk your life for your country?" The way she said it, it almost sounded like she was mocking him,

"Yes. It's an honor to fight alongside my fellow men. We're fighting for a good cause. To free people from tyranny. To give them back their freedom. I just wanna help people."

She brushed a strain of hair behind her ear. "I don't mean to offend you, Steve." She used his first name like they'd known each other for years. Wait, did he even know her last name? "You'd be surprised how many soldiers are just in it for the fame and the girls. They don't really take it seriously. Speaking of girls, is there one waiting for you at home?" She asked with a grin.

"No." He answered with pink cheeks. "No one ever looked twice at me."

Her eyebrows almost reached her hairline. "What? Are American girls blind?"

"No." He said, almost bitterly. "Definitely not. I didn't always look like this. I...I was kind of... a late bloomer."

"So what? I consider myself a good judge of character and you seem like a good guy. Your eyes never once dropped to my neckline. I'm almost offended actually."

Now he was fully blushing and Natalia laughed. "I'm sorry?"

She was smiling at him. "And you're sweet. Almost adorably cute."

"Yeah, well...women don't seem to like that."

"Then they're morons! But maybe I should be thankful for that or otherwise you would have a girl waiting for you and wouldn't be talking to me." She said with a wink. Was she flirting with him? "What are you gonna do when the war is over?"

"I'm an artist...well, not really." He added quickly when he saw her face light up. "I mean I went to art school for a year and do sketches but it would be great to do it professionally. But I also wouldn't mind staying in the Army. " Could he even just leave the Army after the war? Wouldn't that be selfish? Living a civilian life even though he had all these abilities now?

Natalia reached into her purse and handed him a pen. She shoved her napkin over to him. "Can you draw me something?"

"Um...uh, what? What do you want me to draw?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "Anything. I'm not picky. Hey, maybe you'll be a great artist one day and I can sell it." She grinned and he huffed a laugh out. That was more than unlikely but why not humor her. He thought about it for a moment and then started to move the pen over the napkin. He shoved it back to her after he was done, unable to look into her eyes.

"Is that me?" She breathed out and he looked up at her. Her cheeks were flushed and he couldn't quite tell what she was thinking. "Thank you. It's really beautiful."

"I had a beautiful model." He blurted out and his eyes widened in shock. _Jesus Christ!_

Natalia's cheeks turned even redder. "You're sweet. Thank you. I don't think I've never met such a nice boy before." She said and now _she_ sounded almost bitter. He almost asked what that meant because the way he saw it, Natalia should only meet men who treated her well and with respect. He would always treat her with admiration and respect. God, where was he going with this?! He just met her and he was going back to the front in two days.

"What do you want to do?" He asked her.

"Right now, I'm just doing...jobs that... present itself. Someone has a task for me and I'll do it. But I always wanted to be a ballerina. I have the training but...well, it will never happen." She said with sad smile.

"Maybe once the war is over and everything is kind of back to normal? You could go to Paris." He would love to see her dance one day. He was sure that she would make a great ballerina.

"No. That's never gonna happen for me. My path is already made." She moved her hand forward and her pinky touched his. She seemed to have done it unintentionally but she didn't move her hand away. Did she feel that spark too, once their fingers started touching?

"I'd love to see you dance, Natalia."

"That's the first time you said my name." She smiled and placed her hand on his. God, he hoped that she wouldn't notice his goosebumps. "What's your favorite childhood memory?"

"Huh?" Where was that coming from? "Um...Oh, I know! I was fourteen and I saved enough money to take my mother to dinner for her birthday. It was nothing fancy, just some diner and we had burgers and milkshakes...but she looked so happy. When I think of her, I'll always think of that day."

Natalia smiled softly. "That's a wonderful memory, Steve."

"What's yours?"

"It's probably silly. I think I was ten, maybe eleven and I had to walk through a forest to get to the next village and I was exhausted but I saw this deer right in front of me. We just looked at each other and I don't know...I've never felt that peaceful before or ever again. It's stupid."

"No, it's not."

She smiled a little. "Thank you."

She asked him all kinds of questions about America and his childhood but didn't really talk about herself. He wondered if she'd had a tough upbringing and didn't like to talk about her past. She did tell him a few things she'd seen in London.

"Okay guys, it's two am." The bartender suddenly yelled. "It's time for you to go home."

God, had he been talking to Natalia for three hours? He looked for Bucky who was making out with the blonde. What a surprise. They pulled apart. Bucky looked over to him. "I'm walking Lillian home. See you tomorrow!" He grinned and took the girl's hand who giggled, and they left the bar together.

"You want me to walk you home now that your pal ditched you?" Natalia asked amused.

Steve laughed. "That's nice. Do you want me to walk you home?" She raised an eyebrow and looked amused. "I mean...I just want to make sure that you get home safely." He stuttered out. He didn't mean to imply anything else. That wasn't him.

Natalia looked like she wanted to decline his offer, but then she nodded. "That's very sweet of you. Thank you." They paid (Natalia wouldn't let him pay for her drinks) and he helped her into her coat before they left the bar as well.

The guesthouse she was staying at was only a ten minute walk away. She'd looped her arm through his during their walk and his heart started fluttering. Did the few people who saw them thought that they were a couple? Natalia asked him about his mother and the way she reacted almost made him think that she'd grown up without one. But she'd said that her mother had been American and taught her English...

"This is me." She stopped and tilted her head towards the house behind them. "Thank you for getting me home safely."

"You're welcome."

She bit her lip and his gaze fell immediately to her mouth. "Would you think less of me if I kissed you right now, Steve Rogers?"

She wanted to kiss _him?_ He'd never wanted anything more in his moment. Not even to join the army. "No, I-" He didn't come any further because she was already pressing her lips against his. At first very carefully but then she cupped his face and moved her lips eagerly against his. His hands landed on her waist and he pulled her closer. So this was what all the fuss was about! He had to admit that kissing was really great! He could only focus on how soft her lips felt and how nice she smelled.

"Do you want to come up?" She whispered against his lips.

He gulped and took a step back. Was she...He'd never thought the day would come that something like this would happen to him. She smiled softly at him, her cheeks flushed and her pupils were so wide that he almost couldn't see the green of her eyes anymore. "Yes."

Her smile grew wider and she took his hand and they sneaked quietly up to her room.

* * *

Natalia was laying on her stomach on her bed and he drew circles on her naked and lightly sweaty back. He had slept with a woman. He'd never pictured it happening like this with a woman he'd just met, but it had felt right.

"Alright, I have a question for you, which you do not have to answer. I feel like if you don't answer it, though, you're kind of answering it, you know?" She turned her head to look at him.

"What?"

"Was that your first time?"

 _Shit_. He thought that it had been good for her. "That bad, huh?" He asked quietly. He'd wanted her to feel as amazing as he had felt.

"No!" She said immediately and sat up rolling him on his back to hover over him. "It was amazing!" She said with a grin. "Don't worry about that! It was just...I don't now...You seemed so nervous and actually listened to me and my body to figure what I like. For a first time that was really impressive!"

"Yeah?"

"Mhm." She murmured and kissed him passionately. He wrapped his arms around her small waist and they kissed and kissed until they were both out of breath. " _Oh_." Natalia moaned. "Feels like you're ready for the next round."

Afterwards they were both panting and on their backs looking up at the ceiling. "You're a quick learner, Rogers." She chuckled and took his hand to lace their fingers together. "I'll give you that."

"Thanks?"

She grinned at him and kissed the back of his hand. "It's almost dawn." She whispered.

"Shit! I have to be at the barracks soon. I'm so sorry!" He didn't just want to leave like that. A part of him wanted to stay here with her. To stay here with her for good but he couldn't. And he probably shouldn't. "I...I'm leaving tomorrow."

"I understand."

"Can I...Can I see you again? Tonight? Or maybe-"

"I don't think that's a good idea." She interrupted him.

"Are you staying here for longer? Can I write you?"

Natalia sighed and let go of his hand. He felt like she'd slapped him. Had he been reading too much into this? "That's not a good idea. The best thing would be if you'd forget all about me."

"I don't think that's possible."

She smiled sadly. "You're such a sweet man, Steve. The girl you're gonna marry one day is very lucky." She cupped his face and kissed him. "I'll never forget you, Steve Rogers. But you should forget about me. It's better this way, believe me."

"Natalia-"

"If things were different...If I was different...I would write you and I would wait for you but...I could never be the right girl for you."

"I feel like there is something you're not telling me. Are you married?" Had he slept with a married woman? There had to be something because she wouldn't be acting like this if she'd just wanted to get rid of him.

"No, I'm not married. I wish I could tell you the truth, but you're better off not knowing, trust me." Her eyes were glistening but the tears were gone after she blinked. "You should leave now."

"Natalia-"

"Please just leave."

He didn't want to but he respected her wish even though he felt like she didn't want him to go. None of this made any sense. He got out of bed and back into his uniform. "I'll look for you once the war is over, Natalia."

"You don't even know my full name."

"I'll figure it out."

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "It's Natalia Romanova."

"Thank you." He didn't know how but he knew that it was a big gesture of trust that she'd told him that. "Thank you."

She stood up with the sheets wrapped around her naked body. She walked over to him and cupped his face with her small and soft hands. "You're one of a kind, Steve Rogers." She kissed him softly. "I'll never forget you."

"I'll find you. I won't stop until I find you and you can explain everything to me." He promised her fiercely. Maybe he was crazy, but he wanted a future with her.

"You shouldn't, but I want you to." She laughed quietly like she couldn't believe what she had just said. "Will you run away with me after you saved the world?"

"Yes."

She smiled and kissed him again. "Then you won't have to look for me. Let's meet one week after the war is officially declared over at our bar."

He nodded. "Yes. One week after the war is over."

She was basically beaming at him and his heart was racing. "And then we'll run away together. You're going to show me your Brooklyn?"

"I promise."

She kissed him again and he'd _never_ felt like this before. He barely knew her but he'd risk _everything_ for her. Was this what love at first sight felt like?

"Promise that you won't trust any Russians."

"What?"

"Promise me that you won't trust them. They are not just trying to defeat the Nazis."

What was she saying? What did she mean? How did she know this? Was she working for the Brits? It was crazy, but he trusted her. "I promise."

"Good." She almost looked relieved. "You have to go now before anyone sees you."

"Are you in danger?" The whole thing just felt...weird.

"No, but you might be."

"What? Come with me." He pleaded.

"No, I have to deal with a few things before we can run away together." She kissed him again and he knew it was a goodbye kiss. "I'll see you."

"Yes." He kissed her one last time and then walked to the door. She watched him with a smile and he nodded at her before he walked out of the room. God, he hoped the war would be over soon and Natalia would be waiting for him at the bar.

* * *

 _2012_

He'd sacrificed his life and that fucking Tesseract was still a threat to the world. He'd died for _nothing_. He'd slept for seventy years and now he had to get the Tesseract back _a_ _gain_ _._ From a fucking alien. He'd missed living his life for _this_. God, he hated everything here. He'd waken up and his world was gone. His friends were dead. Everything was different and foreign to him. How was he supposed to catch up on seventy years?

He looked around the plane, a quinjet as Agent Coulson had explained, and thought about what else he'd lost. _Natalia._ He'd lost any chance of running away with her. Of being with her. Had she been at the bar one week after Japan had surrendered? Had she thought that he'd stood her up? Had she realized that he'd been gone? Dead? Had she found out that he had been Captain America? Had she been able to get away from whatever mess she had been in? Had she lived a good life? Had she been a ballerina?

"I gotta say it's an honor to meet you, officially." Agent Coulson interrupted his train of thoughts. Steve hoped the smile he was giving him was convincing. "I sort of met you, I mean, I watched you while you were sleeping. I mean, I was... I was present while you were unconscious from the ice. You know, it's really, it's just a... just a huge honor to have you on board."

He stood up. "Well, I hope I'm the man for the job." He had to focus on Loki and the Tesseract. He could wallow in self pity once he'd completed the mission. Maybe SHIELD could find out what had happend to Natalia. He just hoped that she'd lived a long and happy life.

The quinjet landed on the landing strip of the carrier and he followed Coulson down the ramp. He looked up from the ground and his heart almost stopped beating. No, that was not...Was he hallucinating? The woman standing at the end of the ramp looked _exactly_ like Natalia. But that was not possible! Was his mind playing tricks on him?

"Agent Romanoff." Coulson said and then pointed at Steve. "Captain Rogers."

 _Romanoff_? That sounded a lot like _Romanova_. What the fuck was going on? Was she Natalia's granddaughter? Had Natalia found a man and started a family? His stomach twisted in knots at the thought even though he knew he had no right to feel like this.

"Ma'am?" He managed to say.

"Hi." Agent Romanoff said with a smile that lit up her whole face. And he _knew_ in that moment with every fiber of his being that this _was_ in fact Natalia. He didn't know how it was possible but that was his Natalia standing in front of him. Alive and barely looking a day older than the last time he'd seen her. "I thought we said one week and not almost seventy years, Steve Rogers."


	64. Hi (Part II)

They saved New York. Together they defeated Loki and his Chitauri and stopped an alien invasion. They had been things that bothered him, especially regarding Fury and SHIELD, but Natalia trusted him and the organization so he gave them the benefit of the doubt. _Natasha,_ her name was now Natasha, he reminded himself. They hadn't really had any chance to talk to each other, not without anyone listening and he wanted to talk to her in private. He had to know if she was involved with Agent Barton.

 _Is that love, Agent Romanoff?_

 _I owe him a debt. Love is for children._

What did that mean? Had she been lying to Loki? Had she been telling the truth? He could see that she cared a lot about Barton and he couldn't hold it against her if she'd fallen for him. Everyone thought that Steve had been dead. And how was she even alive?! How was that possible? God, his head hurt!

He went back to his apartment after the shawarma and the debriefing and let SHIELD and Stark deal with the press. Steve was in no mood to give a press conference or even talk to people. Too many thoughts were running through his head. Where did Natasha go after the debriefing? Was she with Barton? Taking care of him? Who was he to her? Just her friend, or her boyfriend? Maybe even her _husband_? He hated himself for being jealous.

He took a hot shower and changed into sweatpants and a shirt and was about to make some tea when someone knocked on his door. Who could that be? He didn't want any company. Well, that wasn't entirely true. He walked to his front door and looked through the peephole. His heart started racing when he saw who it was.

He immediately opened the door to let her in. God, she was still so fucking beautiful. Her hair was shorter but besides that she still looked the same. She wasn't wearing any make up and wearing simple jeans and a top.

"Hi." She gave him a soft smile and his heart was fluttering. She was really here and alive. And she came to see him!

"Hey."

"Can I come in?"

He nodded and stepped aside. He noticed when she walked past by him that she had a file under her arm. She looked around his hallway and then turned to him.

"You probably have a lot of questions."

"Yeah, but...Can I..." God, he was suddenly so embarrassed.

"What?"

"Can I hug you?" He hadn't touched a human in forever and he missed it. The last time he'd hugged someone was Bucky shortly before he...before he'd died.

Natasha put the file on the small dresser in his hallway. "Of course." She held her arms open and he came willingly. He pressed her against his body and wrapped his arms tightly around her. He breathed her scent in and he didn't know who to thank but he was so fucking grateful that she was still here.

He felt her clutched the back of his shirt. "I never forgot you, Steve. They took everything away from me, but they could never take my memories of our night away."

 _They?_ What had happened to her? The things Loki had alluded to when he'd been talking to Natasha sounded...horrible. "The last thing I thought about before I went under-" He whispered into her hair. "Was you. And the first thing I thought about when I woke up was you. You are always on my mind."

Natasha pulled her head away from his chest and looked up at him. Her eyes were glistening and one of her hands moved to his neck. "Kiss me, please. Please kiss me before I tell you everything. Just kiss me, Steve."

He lowered his head and pressed his lips against hers. And for the first time in weeks he felt alive and not numb anymore. He was here with her and everything was okay. The kiss started slow and soft but soon they were kissing like their lives depended on it. He pressed her against the wall behind her and kissed her with everything he had. Natasha kissed him back eagerly and almost desperately and pulled him back every time he tried to pull away to let her get some air.

" _Natalia_." He whispered against her swollen lips and she gasped and crashed their lips together again. His whole body was on fire and he was finally happy again. He'd thought he'd never experience happiness again. They were both alive and together.

"Steve?" She looked at him with dilated eyes and flushed cheeks. He knew what she was asking. He wanted her too. He wanted all of her. He lifted her up and walked through the hallway to his bedroom.

They barely talked, only soft cries and moans of each others names while they gave into each other. They spent hours in his bed exploring their bodies, touching and kissing each other. It almost felt like they tried to catch up on seventy years.

They were on their sides facing each other and Natasha was tracing invisible lines on his face. "I was waiting for you." She whispered into the darkness of his bedroom. "I came to the bar every day for a whole week. I think I knew that something had happened to you but I didn't want to believe it." She closed her eyes. "I had no idea that _you_ were Captain America who sacrificed his life. I did some digging and when I realized that you were him and that you were dead..." Her voice trembled and he pulled her against him.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He mumbled against her cheek. "If I had another choice..."

"I know you did what you had to do. I was so heartbroken. I'd already pictured our life in Brooklyn together. It was silly. I mean I'd just met you but I never wanted anything that much before. I just wanted to be with the sweet boy from the bar. I was so devastated and angry at the world for taking you away from me that I went back to them."

"Back to whom?"

"The Red Room. I was a free agent when I met you and could do whatever I wanted in my free time. I was content with my life but then I met you and I wanted a different life. With you." She brushed her lips against his. "But they found out about me wanting to defect and wiped my memories again and again. Planted new, fake ones into my brain to make me comply. But I never forgot your warm eyes and sweet smile." She smiled sadly. "They couldn't take that away from me."

"Red Room?" He asked because he still pretty much understood nothing.

"The Russians took young girls from families or orphanages to turn them into spies and assassins. We were raised to be the perfect killers." Natasha moved away from him. "There was still hope for me when I met you, but when I returned to them because I didn't know where else to go... They took everything that was still good in me and turned me into a monster. And I just let them."

"No, I don't believe that. You're not a monster." He cupped her cheek and she closed briefly her eyes. He'd seen bad people and Natasha wasn't one of them. She was good, he'd seen how worried she'd been about Barton and how she hadn't hesitated to fight the Chitauri.

"I brought you my file so you can make your own opinion about me." She sat up and pulled the sheet up to cover her chest. "I think you'll hate me after you read about everything I've done. I have so much blood on my hands." She buried her face in her hands. "God, I shouldn't have slept with you. I'm sorry."

"No, don't do that. I wanted it too and I haven't felt this alive and good since I woke up. I've been so miserable thinking that I missed my chance with you. Don't take this away from me."

"I should go now." She stood up and looked around his bedroom for her clothes. "My phone number is in my file. You can call me if you still want to after you found out what I really am." She got into her clothes. He didn't want her to go but he figured that she needed space. "I've never felt like this about anyone else in the last seventy years, Steve. I want you to know that." She smiled but it didn't reach her eyes and left his apartment. He waited a few seconds and then got out of bed to read her file. He already knew that whatever was in there wouldn't change a thing. He was in love with her, he'd loved her since the first moment he'd seen her. Nothing would ever change that.

* * *

He spent the rest of the night and the whole day reading her file. He cried for her and he had to throw up a few times because of the things they'd done to her. They had abused her, tortured her and wiped her memories again and again to turn her into the perfect killer. It wasn't easy to read about what she had done for the Red Room and the KGB. The list of her confirmed kills was very long and he wondered how many were uncounted for. But it didn't change a thing for him. She'd had no free will, even when she'd met him she had already been under the clutches of the Russians. She'd never had a chance, they had taken that away from her. She had been their victim for almost 80 years until Barton had decided to give her a chance. Steve hated himself for not being able to come to that bar and run away with her. Her life could have been different. They could have been happy and Natasha wouldn't have had to go through hell.

He didn't hate her, he couldn't. He still loved her, knowing her past didn't change that. He thought he might even loved her more now knowing that she'd managed to break free and was now helping people.

He went through the papers until he found the note with her number on it. He grabbed his phone and dialed her number. He was glad that SHIELD had gotten him a phone with buttons and not one with a touch screen.

She answered after a few rings. "Yes?"

"It's me, Steve."

"Hi." She said slowly, she almost sounded like she couldn't believe that he actually called.

"I'm so sorry for everything, Natalia. _Natasha_. I'm so sorry I wasn't there to run away with you. I'm sorry I failed you."

"Oh, Steve. You did nothing wrong. You saved the world! And I did _everything_ wrong. I shouldn't have gone back to them. I should have run away on my own. But I was...I was so scared and I missed you so much. When I found out that you were dead...That was the first and only time I ever cried. My heart was broken."

He pressed his lips together to swallow a sob. "I don't hate you, Nat. I never could. You did the right thing when you were offered a chance. That's all that matters."

"I'm still working on redeeming myself. I still have red in my ledger." Just the fact that she said that, proved that she was a good person. "I'm enhanced. I got injected with a Red Room serum." She suddenly said. "Not on your level, but it's the reason I still look young. Not a lot of people know my real age."

"I won't tell a soul." He promised. Did that mean that he wouldn't age as well? Did they maybe have decades and decades of time together?

"I never told anyone about you. The Red Room never knew about you. They just knew that I tried to run away. They didn't know why. Not even Clint knows. I didn't want to share you with anyone." She whispered. "What we had that night...that dream of a life together...it was too private and precious to tell anyone else about it."

He blinked his tears away. Did she love him too? Even after all this years? "I told Bucky about our plan." He blurted out. "Not everything, just that we wanted to see each other after the war."

"I'm sorry about your friend. I read about him when I read about you."

"Thank you. I think you two would have gotten along very well." Thinking about Bucky was still so painful but he knew that Buck would want him to live his life. "Were you and Clint...are you...were you..." He stuttered out. He didn't really want to know but he had to. He didn't think that they were currently together or Natasha wouldn't have slept with him.

"No, never. It was never like that between us. I...I haven't really been with anyone since you...Not out of my free will." She said slowly and she sounded so ashamed. He almost broke the kitchen table out of rage. He hated it that she had been forced to...use her body for the Red Room. "I never met someone who could hold a candle to you. I...I thought about you every day. No other man had looked at me the way you looked at me when we were making lo- when we were intimate. I understand if you're disgusted that I...I had to sleep with so many people."

"No, no! I'm not! You could never disgust me! I'm just so furious that you had to do that. That you had no saying over your own body."

"I was worried that you might think that I'm a whore."

"I would never call you that. Or any woman for that matter." He said immediately.

"There's something else...I can't get pregnant. I can never give you children, Steve." She said slowly.

"I don't care. I only want you. I don't need children to be happy." He really didn't. He never really thought about being a father. Before the serum he'd been scared his offspring would inherit his many sicknesses and then after the serum...he hadn't really thought about it. And Natasha was all he wanted in his life. "You're everything I could possible want and need."

"You're a good man. Not many think like that. So...you want me in your life?" She asked so quietly that he almost didn't hear her over the phone.

"Of course. You're the _only one_ I want in my life. The only one I trust. I can't even tell you how happy I am that you're still alive. I-" He almost told her that he loved her but he didn't want to tell her over the phone.

"Can we just be friends for now?" She asked. "I think we should take everything slowly. You're still adjusting to a very unique situation. And I want to help you find your way in this world."

His heart sank for a moment because he'd wanted to ask her out to dinner. He almost wanted to run away with her now. To leave this new and crazy world behind them and just be together. But she was probably right and he could use a friend. "Yes. Friends sounds good."

Natasha chuckled lightly. "Don't be too disappointed. I don't wanna be _just_ friends for the rest of our lives, Steve Rogers. I spent 70 years pining after you."

* * *

Natasha helped him adapt to this new world in the next weeks. She taught him how to use a computer and smart phone, wasn't annoyed when he didn't understand something immediately and didn't mind helping him catch up on history. She considered herself an expect since she'd lived through everything and could tell him things that hadn't made it into the history books. She went shopping with him to get him a modern wardrobe and chose a new haircut for him. She came with him to his meetings at SHIELD. She helped him track down Bucky's sister and visited with him her daughter. Jamie thought Natasha was his girlfriend and she didn't correct her. She watched countless movies with him and made him watch her favorite shows. They went to Coney Island together and she blushed furiously when he won a teddy bear for her. He was so smitten with her in that moment that he almost told her that he loved her.

And he noticed that she was different around him. She was distant and cold at SHIELD, and her and Stark were constantly barking at each other when they were in the same room. She acted at SHIELD like Coulson's death didn't bother her but she'd admitted to him that Coulson had been like a father to her and his death had hit her pretty hard.

She was goofy and made terrible jokes when they were alone. She smiled and laughed a lot around him and he always felt like the luckiest guy in the world when he was the reason for her smile. She pecked his lips every time he did _something adorable_ in her words and he wanted to kiss her more but he respected her wish to just be friends for now. She had a point. He didn't want her to think that he just wanted her because she was the last part of his old world.

She wore black pants and leather jackets at SHIELD and pretty sundresses and sneakers when she was with him. She demanded that everyone call her Romanoff at work, but she smiled warmly when he called her Nat when they were alone. She told him that her favorite genre were musicals and she always sang along when they watched one. She taught him how to dance and kissed him while they were slow dancing to Elvis Presley. She spent the night with him that day.

They were intimate another two times despite being _just friends._ The first time was when he'd woken up from a terrible nightmare and called her to just hear her voice. She showed up at his door half an hour later and kissed him as soon as he opened the door whispering again and again that he wasn't alone. They made love (there was no other word for it) on his living room floor and then slept there with her head on his chest. The second time was when she came from visiting Barton and she didn't say anything but it must have been bad. They laid down on his bed for a nap and made love when they woke up. They didn't talk about the fact that they had sex twice despite just being friends but he could see that it meant as much to her as to him.

She slept with him again on his birthday after she invited him to dinner and went to an art gallery with him. Maybe they should talk about making things official between them, but to him they were a couple and the fact that she made him breakfast the next morning (pancakes shaped into hearts) and kissed him goodbye made him think that she felt the same about them.

He'd never been to her place. He had no idea where she lived. They always spent time in his apartment. They just left the cinema after a special afternoon screening of Disney classics when it started to rain cats and dogs. The sky was almost black and he already heard the thunder.

"Let's wait at my place until the storm is over." Natasha yelled and he followed her into the cab she'd hailed.

They walked into an old apartment building. "I don't have guests over. Like ever." She said with an excusing smile before she unlocked her door.

Her apartment was small and had only basic furniture but there was a whole wall covered in books. She didn't have a couch just a bed at the opposite wall of the books. His gaze stopped at the framed photo next to her bed. It was _him._ Before he'd gotten the serum, it showed him with his dog tags and he still remembered the day at the base when the picture was taken of him. The fact that she'd framed a photo of his old self and not one of him after the serum warmed his heart.

"Oh." Natasha ran over to her bed and hid the frame underneath her pillow. Her whole face was red. Why was she embarrassed?! "I forgot that was there."

"How do...Why do you have that?"

"Um..." Her face somehow even got redder. She was nothing like the Natasha roaming the hallways at SHIELD. "Uh,I...I broke into the SRR base when I had my first mission in New York...I wanted to see if they had anything about you and your photo fell out of your file and I just took it...Uh, do you want it back?!"

"No. I...I feel very flattered that you kept it all these years." He said softly and he just wanted grab her face and kiss her. His mother had always said to him that he would know when he'd found the one and he knew in that moment.

Natasha's face slowly returned to its original color. "I should probably tell you that I also still have your drawing since you already know about the photo."

He stepped closer to her. "Natasha-"

"I love you. I've loved you for so long." She blurted out and her eyes widened. "Oh God!" She gasped. "Please forget what I just said."

"I can't." He cupped her face. "I can't, because I love you. I love you since the first moment I saw you."

Natasha smiled softly and closed her eyes. "How lucky are we that we get a second chance?"

"So damn lucky, sweetheart." He whispered and she blushed. He wondered if anyone had ever called her an endearment or even told her that they loved her. "I love you."

"I love you." She repeated fiercely and kissed him pulling him with her onto her bed.

* * *

He heard his front door open while he was staring at the files Fury had dropped off earlier today. He'd offered him a job in DC and given him a range of agents he could pick from to be his partner. There was only one agent he wanted as his partner but he didn't know if she wanted the same.

"Honey, I'm home!" Natasha singsonged and came into the living room. "I got everything for chicken tikki masala." They had been cooking recipes from all over the world preferring to stay at home where no one was bothering them and it was just the two of them. She walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "Hi." She whispered and kissed his neck. He turned his head so she could kiss him.

"Hi, sweetheart."

She smiled and kissed him again. "What's this?" She nodded at the files on the coffee table.

"Fury came over. He offered me an official job at SHIELD. In DC. These are the files of potential partners."

"Am I on the list?" She asked.

"No."

"Oh." She looked hurt.

"But I want to go to Fury and demand you as my partner."

"Yeah?"

"Of course. There is no one else I trust more to have my back." He told her truthfully and her whole face lit up. He already realized that a lot of SHIELD agents didn't trust Natasha which pissed him off. Hadn't she proven herself by now?

"I want to be your partner in every part of your life." She admitted with pink cheeks. He nodded and wanted to pull her onto the couch but she shook her head. "I have to put the groceries for our dinner away."

He pouted playfully and she grinned pecking his lips and then disappearing into his small kitchen. He followed her. "The job is in DC."

"I figured. Are you okay with moving to DC?"

She put the meat into the fridge and turned around. "Are you? You love Brooklyn!"

"I do, but I also don't mind living somewhere else. SHIELD is gonna provide an apartment."

"Don't take it." She said immediately.

"What? Why?"

"I wouldn't put it past Fury to bug it. He'll probably have an undercover agent live in your building." She looked at her feet. "We could...we could look for a place together?"

"Really?" He was definitely grinning like an idiot and Natasha ran to him to peck his lips. Looked he did something adorable again.

"Maybe we can even get a house?" She asked shyly. "I've never lived in one. I always pictured us to live in a house when I was dreaming about our future."

"I never lived in a house either." He cupped her face. "I want to live with you."

She smiled brightly and kissed him. "You make me so happy." He brushed his thumbs over her cheekbones. "I told Clint that you're my boyfriend. I didn't tell him everything. He doesn't know how long we know each other. But he noticed that I was different, happier and I told him the reason."

He knew that was a big step for her. Maybe even bigger than moving in together. "I love you, Natalia." She smiled and buried her face in his chest.

* * *

 _2013_

Natasha taught him new fighting skills and prepped him on everything SHIELD related. She helped him pick members for his team and he was surprised that Barton wouldn't come back to work in the field. He'd wanted him on his team for Natasha. And he really liked to get to know the man who'd turned around Natasha's life. She'd only told him that Barton had left New York, he could tell there was more to it but he knew that she would have told him more if she could.

They found a nice and beautiful house for rent in Georgetown and signed the lease together. Natasha gave SHIELD two PO addresses because she wanted their address to be confidential. He trusted her to do what was smart and would keep them (mostly her) safe.

They both agreed to keep their relationship a secret around SHIELD. He didn't want anyone to know about his private life and he didn't want people to reduce Natasha to his girlfriend. He'd expected that to change but women still weren't regarded as equals.

He was sitting in his new office at the Triskelion going over files of potential threats in the Middle East. He hadn't been in the field since New York and he was kind of enjoying it. It had given him and Natasha the time to get to know each other and to strengthen their relationship. Natasha had already left to go home to let the new couch and their dinning room table in. As it turned out, Natasha loved to decorate and furnish their house and it took him some time to realize that this was the first time that Natasha had a real _home._ At home she was his sweet and dorky Natasha and at SHIELD she was the Black Widow. It had been weird at the beginning but he understood why she acted this way. And he felt honored that she let him see the real Natasha.

He shut his laptop and decided to call it a day. He put his shield on his back and left his office. He waited for the elevator and Fury came into his view when the door opened.

"Rogers."

"Sir." He greeted the director and stepped into the elevator.

"Going home?"

"Yes, sir."

Fury nodded. "You know you never explained to me why you picked Romanoff as your partner."

"She proved herself to be a formidable agent during the Chitauri invasion. I trust her." _And I love and trust her more than anything in the world_

Fury chuckled. "I think Coulson and Barton are the only ones who ever said these three words about her."

"You don't trust her?!"

"The last time I trusted someone, I lost an eye." Fury chuckled darkly. "Romanoff is good at her job but I wouldn't let her watch my dog."

"You have a dog?"

"No." The elevator reached the garage and he was glad to get away from Fury. "Listen Rogers, I don't know what's going on between you and Romanoff, and I don't really want to but be careful. She eats boy scouts like you alive."

He really wanted to tell Fury to go fuck himself in that moment. "I'm not a boy scout. And you don't have to worry about me."

Fury almost looked...sad. "It's not you I'm worried about."

Steve had no idea what that meant but he did wonder if Fury knew that he and Natasha were more than just partners. He decided not to tell Natasha about this weird conversation when he got home.

The smell of vanilla and cinnamon greeted him when he opened the front door. He dropped his keys into the bowl in the hallway and hung his shield up before he made his way into the kitchen.

Natasha was just taking a baking sheet full of cookies out of the oven. She'd taken a liking to baking since they'd moved into their house and she was really good at it. She put the baking sheet on the kitchen counter and smiled. "Hi, soldier." She smiled and slapped his hand when he tried to steal a cookie. "You have to wait until they're cooled down."

He pouted but she kissed the pout off his lips. "Hi, sweetheart."

Her hands slipped underneath his shirt. "Since you have to wait until the cookies are cooled down...You could use that time to make love to me on our new couch." She whispered and looked up at him through her lashes. Who was he to turn down such a great idea!

* * *

Fury had sent Natasha on a solo mission and Steve was anxiously waiting for her return. She had let him know through a secure line that only the two of them knew about that she was would be home soon. He just didn't understand why Fury had sent her alone. He and Natasha had been doing every mission together since they became partners. And it amazed him every time how _good_ she was at her job. She truly was the best and he couldn't have wished for a better partner. He trusted her with his life and heart.

He heard how the front door got opened and closed and how Natasha typed in the code (the date of the night they met) into their alarm system. He gave her a few minutes to really arrive before he would greet her.

She was getting out of her knee high leather boots when he walked into the hallway. Her leather jacket and holster were already hanging on the wardrobe.

"Hey."

She looked up and her face was...She looked defeated but she tried to hide it. "What's wrong? Are you hurt? What happened?"

She ran towards him and threw herself into his arms, almost knocking him over and kissed him with an urgency that took his breath away. "I love you. I love you." She whispered between kisses. "I love you."

"What happened?" He managed to get out when she pulled away to get air into her lungs.

"You know I can't tell you."

"You think I'll tell Fury you shared confidential intel?" He laughed a little. "Something is obviously wrong and I need you to tell me so I can help you, sweetheart."

"Is Captain America breaking the rules?"

"For your benefit? Always."

She smiled a little and rested her head on his chest for a moment. "I killed someone yesterday. Someone like me."

"Another widow?"

"Yeah. I actually helped train her." She looked to the ground. "I helped turn her into a ruthless killer."

"Nat-"

She shook her head. "Fury sent me to finish her. I offered her the same chance Clint gave me but she refused. We fought and I killed her. That could have been me, Steve. It would have been me if it weren't for you. Clint would have killed me if I hadn't accepted his offer. And I only did it because I knew that you would want me to. The sweet boy with the beautiful blue eyes would want me to turn my life around. I owe you everything."

"No, you don't. You did that all by yourself." He kissed her because she looked like she wanted to object. "You're good. You always have been."

"I love you, Steve. Even when I wasn't capable of love, even when they took that ability away from me...I still loved you. You were always with me."

He hugged her tightly and she buried her face in the crook of his neck. "And I will always be with you. I'm never leaving you again."

"Good." She breathed and pressed kisses onto his neck. "I don't think I could survive losing you a second time."

* * *

He had been furious with Fury but he couldn't tell him of course that he knew that Natasha had killed another Widow. No, he had to bite his tongue and keep working for SHIELD. He liked the work they did and he realized that he couldn't just do a normal job. He needed to go out there and _do_ something. And he knew he was a lucky guy that he could do his job with his girl by his side. They worked well together, they completed each other on the job. And he trusted her judgement when she thought that a situation had to be handled a certain way. She followed his orders without question but he always listened to her suggestions. Some members of his team seemed to be bothered by that but shut up when he shot them a glare. Natasha didn't care about what anyone thought about her and she told him more than ones that she wasn't looking for any friends at SHIELD. Not that he was. He got along with Hill and he trusted the men and women on his team to do their job right but he didn't need to spend his free time with them. He was in contact with Stark but it still kind of freaked him out that he was Howard's son.

"Ugh!" Natasha groaned behind him while she got into her running shoes. "Why do we have to go running?!" She was sashaying over to him. He really liked her in tight yoga pants. "There are so much better ways to burn calories." She ran her finger over his chest.

He grabbed her hand gently and kissed her finger tip. "You don't have to come with me. Stay in bed, I'll join you after my run for some calories burning." He said with a wink.

She laughed. "That was terrible. No, the running is good for my cardio and I like how your ass bounces when you run in front of me."

He shook his head in amusement. "Is that why you're pretending you're not as fast as me?"

"I'm fast but not _that_ fast." She pecked his lips. "Now be nice and I'll let you wash my back under the shower when we're back."

They ran their usual route and passed by that one jogger they saw regularly on their morning runs.

"On your left."

"Uh huh."

He heard Natasha a few moments later. "On your right."

"I hate you both so much!" The man yelled and he heard Natasha snickering.

The shower they took after their run was quite long because Natasha let him wash some other parts of her body besides her back. She was laughing and giggling underneath the steam of the hot water and it was his favorite sound in the world.

He watched her get ready for work and Natasha turned around with a raised eyebrow and pointed at her breasts that were now covered by a bra. "Did you seriously leave a hickey on my left breast?!"

"Yup." He grinned proudly. "I'll intend to leave one on your right one tonight."

Natasha rolled her eyes and slid into her business dress. They would spend most of the day at the Pentagon. "Zip me up?" She turned around and lifted her hair off her neck.

He stood up from the end of the bed and pressed a kiss between her shoulder blades and then on her neck while zipping her dress up. "You look amazing."

"You're such a dork." She said with a warm smile. She crinkled her nose. "But you're my dork."

"Always." He promised and he wondered if he should tell her that he had checked what kind of engagement rings he could afford.

They had countless meetings at the Pentagon accompanied by Hill and Sitwell and he had to grit his teeth every time someone made a stupid comment about Natasha's past and her ties to Russia. Natasha's face showed no emotions but he did wonder if it hurt her deep down. He wanted to put General Talbot through a wall after he made an ugly remark about her but it would have probably made everything worse. But he was so proud of his girl when she corrected him on the current situation on the Ukraine because his intel had been outdated. He had been very embarrassed and Hill barely managed to hide her laugh with a cough.

"Does is bother you?" He asked her when they were back home sitting on their couch and Natasha was sipping on a glass of wine.

"What?"

"How people treat you? They're...they're so disrespectful."

She placed the wine glass back on the coffee table. "It's not like it's coming out of nowhere. I did horrible things, I deserve it." He opened his mouth to object. "I know you disagree, but I don't really care about what other people think about me. Their opinion doesn't matter to me. Only yours does. And Clint's. And Coulson's did. And Fury lets me stay in the States and doesn't send me back to Putin."

"I think the world of you." He really did. She was the most amazing person he'd ever met. She was so strong and smart. And loving and...She was just perfect. It was a horrible thought but he was glad that she hadn't moved on from him. It was the most selfish thing but he didn't think he could have taken it if he gotten her back in his life and she'd loved someone else. She never really talked about what she'd done while he had been in the ice but he knew that she was telling the truth when she said that there hadn't been anyone else.

"And that means the world to me." She whispered softly. "I was so lost without you."

"I thought about you every day during the war. You were always on my mind. Buck was teasing me endlessly." He said with a small smile. "He threatened to tell you every embarrassing thing about me."

"I would have loved to really meet him."

"Yeah, me too." Bucky's death was still...It still hurt like hell but he learned to live with the pain. "He always told me I would find the right girl one day. I didn't even want to go out that night but Buck convinced me. And I'm so glad he did, sweetheart. I'm so fucking glad he did."

Natasha nodded. "We owe him everything." She raised her wine glass. "To James Buchanan Barnes." She took a sip and then handed the glass to him.

"To Bucky. May he be surrounded by pretty dames in heaven." He raised the glass and then took a sip as well.

* * *

 _2014_

"Wait, not so fast!" Natasha laughed while he tugged her along by her hand. They were in London for their first official vacation as a couple and he had to get her to a very special destination. "We're not all super soldiers! I wouldn't have worn heeled boots if I'd known you want to run through half London."

"We're almost there, sweetheart." He turned around and gave her a sheepish grin. "You want me to carry you?"

"Don't you dare! I can walk on my own!"'

He laughed and turned with her around the corner. Natasha stopped walking and her grip on his hand tightened. "Is that...?"

"Yeah." He smiled. "I mean the bar is long gone but this is where we met. And fell in love."

Tears were forming in her eyes. "I haven't been in this part of London since...since I was waiting for you." She blinked her tears away. "I can't believe we're here _together_ now."

"I know. When I...before the plane hit the ice, I pictured you waiting here for me and me coming around this corner. Knowing that it would never happen was more painful than the plane crash. And then when I woke up and thought for a few seconds that it was still 1945...I thought hey I can still make it, and when I realized that it wasn't the forties anymore and that I lost my one chance at true love...I was broken, Nat. I've never felt that kind of pain before but then I saw you at the ramp of that quinjet and I...everything was okay."

Natasha smiled beautifully at him. "I would have waited another seventy years for you. When I heard they found you and that you were alive...that was the happiest day of my life."

He cupped her cheek. "Why didn't you come to me sooner?"

"I was terrified that you wouldn't want me anymore once you knew who I really was."

He kissed her softly and he heard her sigh against his lips. "I'll always want you. I'll always love you. And that's why-" He let go off her and dropped down on one knee pulling the ring box out of his jacket. Natasha's eyes widened and she covered her mouth with her hands. "Will you marry me, Natalia? Will you be my wife for the next seventy years and the next seventy years after that?"

"Yes." She breathed and she was about to drop on her knees as well but he didn't want her to be on the dirty sidewalk so he pulled her to sit on his outstretched thigh. "Of course, I'll marry you!"


	65. Hi (Part III)

_The third and final part -enjoy:)_

* * *

Steve had been more than surprised when Natasha had asked him what he thought about a farm wedding. She'd never stroke him as the kind of woman who would want something like that. He'd always thought she'd wanted an elegant wedding. But he'd agreed. of course. He didn't care where they would get married as long as he would be her husband at the end of the day. Marrying Natasha had been on his mind for...well, pretty much since he'd walked out of the door on their first night together. He'd imagined during the war their little wedding with Buck as his best man. He had known that it had been insane to already think about marriage even by 40s standards but he had been so in love with her. He still was. And he _always_ would be.

He had been the last few days in Toronto for a conference and it was the middle of the night when he finally got home. He walked quietly into the house, putting his suitcase next to the wardrobe. He couldn't wait to climb into bed and pull his girl against his chest. He loved the way she snuggled against him and made those cute, little noises in her sleep. He'd just gotten out of his jacket when Natasha came running towards him and he barely managed to catch her when she jumped into his arms because he had been so surprised. She really moved around like a cat.

"I missed you!" She breathed before she pressed her lips against his. And from that moment on it was a tangle of clothes getting thrown around the hallway and him stumbling to the floor careful not to hurt Natasha. She flipped them and he let her have his way with him.

"What was that?" He laughed, still a bit out of breath but feeling really good.

"I told you I missed you!" She grinned and kissed his shoulder. "It's been really lonely without you in bed to keep me warm." She cupped his face with her left hand and he felt her ring against his cheek. "I'll always miss you when you're away."

"I know the feeling." He whispered and kissed her deeply to show her how much he missed her. She smiled against his lips and wasn't opposed to another incredible round of lovemaking in their hallway.

Steve had just taken a shower at the Triskelion after the intense training session he'd had with his team. SHIELD didn't care about the fact that he'd come home late last night (and then stayed up longer to make love to his Natasha) and he had to report back to duty this morning. His team was in top shape and Natasha had done an excellent job at leading the team in his absence. He hadn't had a chance yet to read the report (because he had been busy this morning at home making breakfast for Nat and watching her get ready. He loved to watch her do her make up and hair. It always felt so intimate and domestic) but he did know that a mission in Cleveland had gone smoothly.

"God, I'm glad that Cap is back." He heard Rumlow grunting when he was about to walk around the corner to get back to his office. "I hate it when that bitch is in charge!" Steve balled his hands into his fists. He wanted to strangle Rumlow in that moment. He was a good agent but he always came off as a dick. "Why didn't Cap chose me as his second in command? I'm a fucking Marine and she's just some...some Russian whore!"

That was it! He was going to kill that asshole! "You know that Fury would kill you if he heard you talk about his favorite like that, right?" Rollins hushed. Natasha was Fury's favorite?! "If Romanoff doesn't do the job first!"

"Please I can take her! She's barely five feet tall!" _She is 5'3, you asshole!_ He thought to himself and he knew that Natasha could take him. She could probably even take Steve out if she really wanted to. "You think Rogers made her his second in command because they're fucking? Why else would he do that? Guess even Captain Perfect is only a horndog like the rest of us."

"She's the only one he knew from before." Rollins said and Steve panicked for a second. Did he _know_? "They fought together in New York. She's an Avenger. Probably thought that it was a good idea."

"She's probably blowing him to stay in that position." Okay, he heard enough. But he felt guilty because Natasha had been in his office once or twice crawling under his desk and unzipping his pants because he had been so tense and she'd wanted him to relax. _That_ was not the reason she was his second in command and he'd returned the favor back at home. He just hated it that people reduced her to _this,_ completely ignoring how good she was at her job. _"_ I can't wait until things are different around here. I hope she's on our side and she'll suck my c-" Rumlow didn't come further because Steve stormed around the corner and lifted him up with his hand wrapped around his throat.

"Shut the fuck up! Do not ever talk about her or any other woman like that again, you piece of shit! Your behavior is disgusting and disrespectful!" He snarled and couldn't help but choke Rumlow a little bit. "You're off the team and I'll make sure that Fury knows about this." He dropped Rumlow to the ground. "If I ever see your face again, I'll will put you through a wall! Understood?"

"Yes, sir." Rumlow choked out and he looked seriously afraid. _Good_. He immediately went to Fury's office to tell him about the incident and Fury assured him that he would deal with Rumlow. Hill came into his office at afternoon to give him files of potential candidates as the new team member. He decided to go with Agent Morse who was apparently an acquaintance of Nat and both women seemed content with the fact that they would be working together. Morse respected Natasha and Steve was happy when he heard that Fury had fired Rumlow. Was Natasha really his favorite?

* * *

"Do you have any wishes for my wedding dress?" Natasha asked him while they were waiting for Sam Wilson to arrive at the cafe. They had been talking to him after their morning runs and after Nat's background check they'd decided to get to know him. She thought that it would be a good thing for him to have a friend outside of their world and it didn't hurt that Sam was a veteran as well.

"Um, should I?" He asked confused. "It's your dress."

She smiled. "Yeah, but I want you to like it."

"Sweetheart, I'll love any dress on you. You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." He said with a dopey grin. Natasha blushed a little and leaned forward to peck his lips. He really liked her habit to reward him with kisses when he did something she thought was adorable.

"Should I come back later?" Wilson quipped and grinned broadly when they both pulled apart to look at him. Steve had been over the moon when Natasha agreed to let Sam know that they were an item. Not that he wanted to parade the fact that he was with her but he did feel a little bit proud that someone knew that this amazing woman was his girl. And soon she would be his _wife_.

"Hi, Wilson." Nat greeted him. "We're glad you could make it."

Sam smiled widely. "Hey, I'm just thrilled that you two decided that I'm cool enough to hang with you."

Steve chuckled. "Well, you passed Natasha background check."

Sam laughed. "I feel like I don't want to know what would have happend if I didn't."

Natasha grinned like a Cheshire cat. "You really don't."

Sam was a great guy and the three of them got along really well and he didn't miss how happy Sam looked when Steve promised to drop by the VA some time.

"I think Wilson has a crush on you." Natasha purred while he got her out of her pants. She was popped up on her elbows laying on their bed and looking at him with a grin. "He looked like you hung the moon or something. I get it. You're pretty awesome."

"Yeah?" He whispered against her thigh before he pressed a kiss on her smooth skin. "I think you're pretty awesome too. The awesomest."

"I don't think that's a word." She laughed breathlessly while he moved his lips up until he was between her legs to press a kiss on her most intimate part. " _Oh._ Yeah, you're the awesomest at this." She moaned and let him peel off her panties.

They spent more time with Sam and he knew that Nat considered him a friend as well. It was nice that someone knew about them. It felt good that Sam asked him how his girl was doing when he and Sam did something without Nat. He knew that Barton knew about them but he hadn't seen him since New York and Nat only said that he was doing good when he asked her about him. Stark seemed to sense that something was going on between him and Nat the few times they saw him, but besides weird comments he never directly asked them if they were an item. He had the suspicion that Stark was a bit afraid of Nat and she and Pepper Potts were in contact.

He'd had few beers with Sam at a sports bar watching a Dodgers game. He still couldn't fucking believe that they moved to fucking _LA_. He'd wanted to invite Nat to a game when they still had been living in New York and he had been flabbergasted when she'd told him they'd moved. He'd stopped on his way home by the supermarket to get Nat her favorite chocolate. He looked for her but she wasn't downstairs.

"Nat?"

"Bedroom!" She responded and he jogged up the stairs already looking forward to the kiss he would get when she saw the chocolate. The bedroom door was open and he dropped the box of chocolate when he looked into the room.

Natasha was laying on their bed in only a Dodgers Jersey. She left a few buttons open and he could see a little bit of her breasts. "Hi, soldier."

"Uh..." He managed to get out. "Um..."

Natasha laughed, clearly pleased with herself and beckoned him to join her. He hastily got out of his clothes and jumped onto the bed. He had no idea what was going on with him but he kissed and touched her anywhere he could and rolled with her around the bed until they suddenly fell down. He barely managed to roll them so she would land on him and not the floor.

Natasha was laughing and pulling herself up so she was sitting on his lap. "I should wear this more often. Good to know that Captain America wants me so much that his reflexes basically don't work anymore."

"Nat." He whined and unbutton the rest of her jersey. "You look so good. So...hot." He said with a blush. God, he sounded like some horny teenager.

Natasha grinned happily and grabbed a pillow from the bed and shoved it under his head. "You want me to leave it on? So you'll think about me every time there's a game?"

He knew he was blushing furiously but he nodded. "Yeah. But I'll always think about you, sweetheart."

Now Natasha was blushing. "You're such a dork." She whispered and leaned down to kiss him deeply. She chuckled into the kiss when his hands moved to her beautiful and round behind.

* * *

Natasha wanted him to see the farm before they would get married there. They still hadn't set a date and both hoped to find time where they could leave for a short honeymoon after the wedding. They couldn't be gone too long with their important jobs at SHIELD, but he hoped a few days somewhere warm would be possible for them. He still didn't know how Natasha wanted to accomplish that since she didn't want Fury or SHIELD to know about them.

"How did you even find this farm, sweetheart?" He asked her while she drove their rental car through a forest. "You don't come across as a farm girl."

"Oh, I'm not." She smirked when she looked briefly over to him. "You'll understand in a bit, darling."

He had no idea what that was supposed to mean. Natasha drove by corn fields and stopped the car in front of a nice farm house. It looked old but it still seemed inviting and cozy. They both got out of the car and Natasha knocked on the front door.

The door got opened by a pregnant brunette who smiled warmly at them. "Hi!" She hugged Natasha and then him. Who was this woman to Nat? "It's so nice to finally meet you, Steve. I'm Laura. Nat has told us so much about you!""

"Hi?" He was still confused and even more confused when Barton showed up behind this Laura. "Huh?"

Barton laughed. "I see that Nat has kept you in the dark. This is my farm. And this is my wife Laura. Good to see you again."

He blinked a few times. Barton was married? He had farm? And he was about to become a father. Natasha spoke up. "I wanted to tell you, but it wasn't my secret to share."

"Fury helped me set this up when I joined SHIELD. He, Coulson and Nat are the only ones who know. Or knew, in Coulson's case."

"Auntie Nat!" A little girl screamed and threw herself into Natasha's arms. "You're here! I missed you!" Nat picked the little girl up and kissed her cheek.

"Hi, Lila. This is Steve. The man I'm going to marry." Natasha said and Lila looked at him with big eyes. He waved shyly at her. He had no experience with children expect Bucky's little sister.

"He looks like Prince Charming!" She whispered and Barton rolled his eyes. A boy, maybe eight or nine, joined them and gave Natasha a hug. He introduced himself as Cooper and asked shyly if he really was Captain America.

They were shown their room and Natasha changed into more comfortable clothes. "I'm sorry it took so long for you to meet them."

"It's okay. I'm happy you have them in your life. And I get why you want to get married here and I love the idea."

"Yeah?" She smiled and sat down on his lap. "They were the closet thing to a family to me until you came back into my life." She pressed kisses onto his jawline. "And now they're your family too."

He wrapped his arms around her waist. "They seem great."

Nat nodded. "They are. Laura is very smitten with you. I think I talked too much about you." She chuckled. "She wants you to help Clint pick a birthday present for her. She loves the engagement ring you gave me." She ran her fingers through his hair and gave him a heated kiss that made him ache for more. "And I think Lila's in love with you." She kissed him again, her tongue exploring his mouth. Would it be terribly rude to skip dinner and just stay in their room? "Gotta keep you interested in me." She whispered against his mouth.

"There's only one girl for me. I've been in love with her for seventy years." He whispered and pulled her into a deep kiss. They made out until Clint knocked on the door yelling that he didn't want to get scarred for life.

* * *

"I bought a tattoo gun." Natasha announced after she came home and joined him on the couch. "I want a tattoo."

"Okay?" He answered and turned the TV off to focus on her completely.

"And I want you to tattoo me." She said and his jaw dropped. What? "I want you to design the tattoo and then tattoo it on my skin. Somewhere on my body that only we'll ever see."

"I have no...Nat, I can't tattoo you! I've never done anything like this before!" What if he hurt her? What-

"I trust you. I know that you can do it." She stood up from the couch and unbuttoned her jeans and pulled them down a bit. "I want it to be here." She tapped on her left pelvic bone underneath her scar. "Only you will see it. And you're the only one who is allowed to touch me there."

"Nat-" He started but a look into her eyes stopped him. She trusted him and she wanted this. And who was he to turn her down. He would always give her what she wanted. "Okay."

Natasha beamed. "Really?"

"I'll do it. I don't really want some tattoo guy get his hands on you." He answered truthfully. The spot she had chosen for her tattoo was pretty intimate. "You already know the motive."

Now she was blushing. "Delphiniums." Okay, there were pretty flowers but he didn't understand why she'd want them on her skin forever. "They're the birth flowers for July."

 _Oh._ "Natasha-" He breathed out, incredibly touched. He was almost mad that a tattoo wouldn't last on his skin. He wanted to say more but she was already kissing him breathless.

"So something of you is always with me." She whispered between kisses and helped him out of his shirt because the mood had changed completely and they both needed each other.

He spent the next days obsessing over the tattoo design and read everything he could find about tattoos and what he had to keep in mind. Natasha somehow managed to steal some artificial skin from the med bay so he could practice. He would normally never encourage such behavior but he didn't want to mess up Nat's tattoo.

He did her tattoo on a Sunday evening and he did a really good job if he did say so himself. Natasha loved it as she told him repeatedly and kissed him deeply. And it surprised him _how much_ he liked the fact that something of him was on her skin forever.

* * *

Natasha sent him a text with an address on his birthday telling him to meet her there. He ended up in front of a dancing studio, he couldn't look inside since the blinds were closed but the door was open when he checked. He walked inside and his breath stopped.

The studio was lit by hundreds and hundreds of fairy lights and in the middle of the room was Natasha in a leotard and tights. She smiled softly. "Happy birthday, honey."

"I...Thank you. What...Um..." He stuttered out. He couldn't believe she did this for him.

"I realized that you've never seen me dance before. And I thought that you...that you maybe want to see that?" She asked carefully and he nodded eagerly. Natasha looked relieved. "Oh, good. I'm a bit out of practice so don't expect too much! And afterwards we're gonna have a picnic here to celebrate the birthday of the love of my life." She walked over to him and cupped his face. "I love you."

"I love you." He smiled and kissed her again. Natasha told him to sit down and she started the music. Seeing Natasha dance was...there were no words for it. She was so beautiful, in fact he didn't think he'd ever seen something more beautiful. She had a calm and serene look on her face and moved like magic. She twirled and jumped and she was grace and beauty personified. He couldn't believe that she shared this with him. The music stopped and she bowed.

"Wow." He breathed out. "Wow. You...That was incredible. Thank you."

Natasha smiled happily and walked over to him and straddled his lap. "I...I haven't danced in forever. I tried it in the fifties but I had to think about you and how you told me that I could be a ballerina and I...it just hurt too much."

He took a deep breath. Knowing that she had lived for seventy years thinking that he had been dead...He didn't think he could have lived with that pain if the roles had been reversed. His Natasha was so strong. "I love you more than anything."

Natasha rested her forehead against his. "I could only ever love you." She kissed him softly. "The only one I ever wanna dance for and with is you, my darling."

"My heart, my life, my soul." He breathed against her neck, overwhelmed with his intense love for her. He'd never thought he could love _that_ much before he'd met her. She was more important than anything. If she'd asked him to hang up his shield to live a normal life, he would do it in a heartbeat. "You're my everything, Nat. Always and forever."

She gently grabbed his hair to pull his head up. She kissed him until they were both out of breath. She pressed her small hand over his heart. "Mine." She whispered and he was sure that she could feel how his heart was fluttering. "Let's get married next weekend. I can't wait anymore. I want to be your wife. I waited seventy years for this."

"Yes." He wrapped his arms around her to press her against him. "Let's make an honest man out of me." Natasha laughed and stood up to shimmy out of her leotard and tights. He pressed his thumb into her tattoo looking up to her. God, she was so beautiful and perfect. And she was _his_.

* * *

He blinked a few times before he could finally open his eyes. God, his whole body hurt. What had happened? He looked around and found Nat sitting on a chair next to the bed he was laying in. She was curled into the chair sleeping. She looked like an angel but he had still problems to remember what happend. Why was he in a hospital bed? His chest hurt like he had been shot. Natasha moved in her sleep and her sweater fell off her shoulder and he saw that she was wearing a bandage.

What-

 _Oh, God_! His heart started racing and the monitor started beeping. Fury'd died. SHIELD had been compromised. They'd tried to kill them. Natasha had been shot. By...By Bucky. Bucky wasn't dead. He was the Winter Soldier and working for Hydra against his will. Hydra was back and SHIELD gone. Bucky had put Steve into a hospital bed. Bucky was out there and probably confused and scared, not really knowing who he was. _Oh God_!

Nat woke up and was immediately by his side. "Shh, it's okay. Just breathe, sweetie. Just breathe. Listen to my voice. Just breathe in and out."

He managed to calm down, thanks to her. "I'm sorry we missed our wedding." They had been about to leave for Clint's farm when Fury had ordered them to come back for a mission. And then everything had gone to hell.

Natasha kissed him very softly. "That's okay. How are you feeling?"

"Peachy keen." He said and she raised an eyebrow. "Everything hurts, but it's doable. Where are we?"

"Stark- Avengers Tower." Nat answered. They were in Manhattan? "I didn't want to risk Hydra trying to finish you, so I had Stark get you after your surgery. His quinjet is equipped for medical transportation, thank God!"

"Bucky?"

"Gone. I think he pulled you out of the river and then ran. I don't think Hydra has him."

"I'm sorry he shot you -again." He still couldn't really wrap his mind around the fact that Buck was still alive and what had happened to him. He couldn't even image what he had been through.

"That's not your fault. It's not even his." Natasha laced their fingers together.

"I have to...I have to go after him, Nat." He said quietly. "I have...He's my best friend."

She nodded with a sad smile. "I know, Steve. I'll already arranged for our stuff to be put into storage and recalled our lease." She caught his puzzled look. "I'm coming with you." He opened his mouth to protest but she put her hand over his mouth. "No! Don't even try, Rogers! I'm coming with you. You think I'll let you chase after Barnes alone? He's your friend but he's also confused and dangerous. I'm coming with you to protect you."

She removed her hand. "I can't ask you to do that."

"Good thing then that you don't have to. I owe Barnes. You said that he convinced you to go out that night. Without him, we wouldn't have met. I'm helping you save him. End of story."

"Thank you." He mumbled quietly. He didn't know if he could even do it without Nat. And just the thought of being separated from her was just _unbearable_.

"I have one condition though."

"What?"

"I wanna get married before we leave." She smiled softly. "My dress is here and I have a tux for you. And I know a trustworthy judge to marry us. We can get married tonight."

"Huh?"

"You want to get married tonight? Start the search for your friend as husband and wife?"

God, what he had done to deserve her. "Yes, Of course I'll marry you tonight. But I...what about the Bartons?"

"We'll have a party at their farm once our lives are back to normal. I don't care where we get married or who's there -I just wanna marry you."

Pepper was truly magical and turned the penthouse of the Tower into a wedding location with hundreds of flowers and candles. She and Tony offered to be the witnesses with Tony constantly remarking while he helped him get ready for the ceremony that he'd known all along that he and _Red_ were a thing.

His eyes almost fell out of their sockets when he saw who was going to marry them. Next to Pepper standing was _Ruth Bader Ginsburg_. How on earth did Nat know her? She nodded at him and the music was already playing.

Jarvis opened the doors and Natasha came into view. She was wearing a beautiful ivory silk dress that was inspired by the forties. She looked...there were no words. She was truly a vision.

"Hi." She whispered and was smiling from ear to ear.

"Hi." He echoed and took her hand to press a kiss on it.

He couldn't really remember much of the ceremony. Only that they both promised to love each other forever and that they both said I do before they were pronounced husband and wife. They shared a drink with Tony, Pepper and Ruth Bader Ginsburg (again, how did Nat know her?!) and then they were alone in the penthouse dancing to the songs Nat had been teaching him to dance to.

"Now that we're alone, I can tell you my vows." Natasha whispered. "I didn't want the others to hear them."

He played with her engagement ring and wedding band. "Okay, _how_ do you know RGB?"

She laughed. "I saved her life a few times and she gives me advice with legalities from time to time." She kissed him. "Now back to my vows. The Red Room made us think that love...love was just an illusion. A fantasy for children and I believed that. Then one night in 1944, I go to a bar and this sweet boy walks in and my heart starts racing." She smiled up at him. "I'm spellbound by him. I go over to him and we talk. The whole night until the bar closes. He walks me home because he's a gentleman and he comes up and we make love." She grinned. "Two times. I fall in love with him and I want to run away with him because I realize that love is real and it's exciting and it's _everything_. But love is also painful because I hear about his death and my heart is broken for over seven decades." He tightened his hold on her waist. "I thought our story was over before it even started but then...you came back to me and you healed me. I know that true love is not an illusion because I found it with you. And I know that I will _always_ love you. I always have and I always will."

He blinked his tears away, moved by her words. "I haven't really...prepared anything." He admitted ashamed. "But I know that I was born to love you. There is no one else for me. You are my first and only one for everything. The only girl I'll ever kiss, the only girl I'll ever make love to and the only girl I will ever love. It's always been you. Even before we met. My heart was always meant for _you_."

A tear was rolling down her cheek and he wiped it away with his thumb. "That was pretty good, Steve." She laughed softly. "I can't tell you how happy I am that you're my husband. I wanted this for so fucking long."

"I know. I dreamed about our wedding all the time during the war."

They danced until the earlier hours of the morning and he was glad that he was already healed enough so that he could carry his _wife_ over the threshold and make love to her on their wedding night.

* * *

 _2015_

Searching for Bucky was...hard and exhausting. They were close to him a few times but arrived when he'd already been gone. Steve would be lost without his wife. He had no clue how to search for someone and he would lose his mind without her. Bucky was out there and needed him and he wasn't there for him. And Natasha...God, Natasha was _so good_ to him. She listened to him and comforted him. And he hated himself that she had to spend her first year of marriage basically on the run. They were both aware of the fact that Hydra was still out there and wanting the Winter Soldier back. Natasha called in a lot of favors and together they followed every clue around the world. She'd dyed her hair brunette and left her engagement ring in a safe at Avengers Tower, she'd told him not to change his look so Bucky could recognize him. So far that they been lucky and they hadn't run into Hydra.

Another lead turned into nothing and they were staying at a motel near Sofia. Natasha dropped her thigh holster onto the coffee table. "You can use the shower first." She said with a small smile. "I'll get us dinner."

"Thank you." He breathed out. He could never really tell her how much he needed her. He couldn't do this without her. He walked over to cup her face and kiss her. "I love you."

"And I love you." She pecked his lips again and shoved a gun into the back of her jeans before she left the motel room. He went into the tiny bedroom and took a hot shower careful to leave enough hot water for his wife. He wasn't so sure if a cheap motel like this had an unlimited supply of hot water. He changed into clean clothes and laid down on the bed. Where was Buck and why didn't he come to him? He had to remember! He'd saved him, he'd pulled him out of the water so he had to remember!

He was so deep in thought that he didn't notice Natasha coming back and leaning over him. "Hey." She whispered and kissed him. "Let's eat." He nodded and let her drag him out of bed. They ate dinner in silence with Natasha rubbing his thigh every now and then to comfort him.

Natasha threw the containers after dinner into the trash and he pulled her into his arms to kiss her deeply. She still tasted like their dinner. "Can we? Tonight?"

Her soft hands moved underneath his shirt. "Of course." She whispered and kissed him again. They didn't make love often and he felt bad that they spent their honeymoon phase like _this._ Their actual honeymoon had just been one night in Paris before they'd gone after Bucky. He was a terrible husband, his beautiful wife deserved so much more. He pulled her shirt over her head and walked her to the bed to give her one night of that famous phase where newlyweds were all over each other.

Later that night Natasha was pressing kisses onto his shoulder. "Talk to me."

"What if we don't find him?"

"We will. He can't hide from me forever. I will find him for you." She promised and she sounded so convinced that he believed her.

He rolled onto his side to face her. "I'm sorry the beginning of our marriage is like this."

She inched closer to him and kissed him. "We're going to be together for...well, pretty much _forever_. We have decades and decades ahead of us. It won't be always like this. This just...this makes us stronger. Everything we do together strengthens our bond and love."

"It's still isn't fair to you."

"Life's not fair, babe." She smiled sadly. "Just look at us and _how long_ it took for us to end up together. We'll get Bucky home. I know we will."

"I would have found you." He blurted out and Natasha furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. "I would have come for you...if you still had been with _them_." He clarified. "I wouldn't have stopped until you were free. Until you could live your life the way you wanted."

"Steve-" She cupped his face and slanted their lips together. "I love you."

* * *

Weeks and weeks passed by without any good lead on Bucky. They been in almost every European country and run into Hydra twice. One time Natasha had gotten hurt during a fight and he'd seen red. It hadn't been a deep wound and she hadn't needed stitches but that moment when she'd yelled and pressed a hand to her side...God, he'd just wanted to kill in that moment.

Natasha insisted that they had a night off and booked a hotel suite in a fancy hotel in Rome. And of course she was right that they needed it. The thought to return home was on his mind more and more. He couldn't do this to Natasha for much longer. He was her _husband_ and he had to give her a real home where she was _safe._

He decided to push all thoughts of Bucky away and to just have a romantic night with his wife. They took a bath together and then left to go to a little restaurant near the hotel. Natasha looked beautiful in her red dress and spoke perfect Italian when she ordered for them. They strolled through the city before they went back to their hotel. That night he made sure that his wife knew how much he loved and appreciated her.

He pillowed his head on her naked chest and ran his hand up and down her arm. Natasha pressed a kiss on top of his head. "Did you just marry me so you could use my boobs as your pillow?" She chuckled and toyed with his hair.

"Of course." He joked and pressed a kiss on her breast. Natasha hummed and tugged on his hair so he would move up. They kissed and kissed until even he was panting into her mouth. "Do you want to go home?"

Nat blinked a few times at him and brushed her thumb over his cheek. "What? Where is that coming from?"

"I just...It's been ten months and we still didn't find him. Maybe it's time to go home." He nuzzled her with his nose to breathe her scent in. The possessive side of him loved it that he also smelled his aftershave on her. "Go back to Brooklyn and buy a house."

Natasha closed her eyes. "I want that. I really do, but we can't. Your friend is still out there and...I know that you won't find any peace until you have him back."

She was right, but he couldn't be selfish anymore. She was his wife and she would always come first. Even before his best friend. _I'm sorry, Buck._ "We can't live like this forever, sweetheart."

"I know." She nodded and wrapped her delicate arms around his shoulders. "I know. Just...Let's wait for the next lead and if that is a bust...then we can go home."

"Okay." God, she was so understanding and supportive. He didn't deserve her.

Someone of Natasha's contacts heard of a man that kind of fitted Bucky's description but Steve wasn't too hopeful. There had been many times where there had been this kind of lead and then it had been somebody completely different or Buck had been long gone. Natasha still wanted to go to Bucharest and he promised himself that they would go home after this. They would go back to Brooklyn and buy a house there.

He wasn't surprised that Natasha spoke Romanian and she asked around and came back to the little park where he was waiting for her. "I think this is the right place. A man who _always_ wears long sleeves and a glove on his left hand buys plumbs regularly on the farmers' market. He's shy and barely talks but he knows the language and is friendly. The description fits your friend. I think we found him."

He felt hope stirring inside of him, but it felt too good to be true. "You know where that guy lives?"

"Somewhere in that industrialized apartment block over there." She got her tablet out of his backpack. "I'll hack into the files of the co-administration, maybe I find something." He watched her face while her eyes where glued on the tablet and her fingers danced across the screen. She looked really positive that they found Bucky. Maybe she was right. Her eyes lit up and she looked at him. "I think I have him. This lease looks suspiciously unsuspicious and the tenant always pays in cash. "Let's go."

"No." He immediately said and Natasha looked surprised. "I'll go and you wait in the car."

"No. We go together."

"Nat, if this is really him and he's not in control...What if he hurts you?!" He couldn't live with that!

"That's why we're going together, Steve! End of discussion!" She shoved her tablet back into the backpack. "Let's go, darling."

He took a deep breath and nodded. He followed Nat through the apartment building until she stopped in front of a door on the fifth floor. "That's it." She knelt down to unlocked the door with a bobby pin and opened it. He stepped inside first and looked around. It didn't look very comfy. Whoever lived here seemed not be very attached to this place. They wouldn't have a problem to leave within five minutes. He found a journal on top of the fridge and opened it. His heart started racing. That was Bucky's handwriting! A photo fell out of the journal and Nat picked up.

"Looks like we're in the right place." She said softly and handed the photo to him. It showed him and Bucky in their uniforms. God, Nat had found him!

He looked up and Bucky was standing behind Natasha. He had been so quiet that they both didn't hear him. Steve quickly grabbed Natasha and pushed her behind him. "Do you know who I am?"

Buck clenched his jaw. "Steve. That's what it said in the museum." He knew that Bucky was lying and hadn't read that in the museum. "I'm not coming with you."

"Bucky-" He began but got interrupted.

"No. You two should leave."

Natasha spoke up. "Steve, wait downstairs in the car." He turned around to look at her. "I need to talk to Barnes alone." Something in her eyes told him that she knew what she was doing.

"Okay." He nodded and left reluctantly the small apartment. He walked back to their rental car and switched between staring at the clock on his phone and the windows of the fifth floor. He knew that Natasha was good and that she could hold her own, but he was still worried. His Buck would never hurt her but...He wasn't really that Buck anymore, was he? What were they talking about? Could she really convince him to come with them? Was it over? Would Bucky come home?

He waited for over thirty minutes and he was ready to check on Natasha when he saw her walking through the front door of the building and behind her was Bucky! He had a backpack with him and looked around while they walked to the car. Natasha opened the passenger door and got in while Bucky sat down in the back.

"Always knew you'd marry a bossy girl." Bucky mumbled and Natasha grinned at him. He gave her hand a squeeze and started the engine.

* * *

 _2016_

Steve walked back into their new kitchen after he'd walked Bucky to the door and thanked him again for helping with the furniture. Two super soldiers hadn't needed much time to unload the truck and Nat had told them where to put everything.

His heart stopped beating for a second when he saw Nat standing on the kitchen counter to be tall enough to put things into the cupboards. He hated it when she did that! She could fall and seriously hurt herself! But he had to admit that the view was really nice.

"I know you're staring at my ass, Rogers!" Nat chuckled and turned around. She stretched her arms out and made grabby hands.

He came closer and she jumped down into his arms. "I could have put that away."

"No." She shook her head. "You already carried half our furniture around today. It was a very sexy." She laughed and kissed him. "You still got some energy left?" She wiggled her eyebrows and he laughed.

"For _this?_ Always." He murmured and trailed kisses on her jaw and neck. "The bed's not built up yet."

"So we'll just use the wall." She smirked and her hands moved to his belt. He blushed furiously thinking back to the day they'd _finally_ found this house and the realtor had left to let them look at the house alone and they'd both loved the house so much that they ended up having sex against the living room wall. And then upstairs against the bedroom wall. His face had been red as a tomato when he'd given the realtor the keys back and told her that they'd wanted the house.

Natasha laughed like she knew what he was thinking about. "I'm so glad we got this house and immediately christened it when we checked it out. You didn't ambush me in the other houses."

Steve snorted. "Excuse me? You were the one who pushed me against the wall and pretty much ripped my pants off."

Natasha grinned happily. "Interested in a reenactment?"

He laughed and pressed her against the first wall available. "Of course."

* * *

He came home to Natasha and Bucky sitting on the floor and playing Monopoly in the living room. His wife and his best friend had become good friends over time. It had taken Bucky some time to realize that Natasha was actually Natalia from the bar. His memory had still been fuzzy, but when he'd recognized her he'd laughed and said that he'd known that Steve would never settle for a different girl. The day he'd remembered that he'd shot Natasha twice had been bad and he had literally been on his knees apologizing and asking for her forgiveness.

"Hi, babe." Natasha grinned and he walked over to her to give her a kiss. He noticed that she'd gotten a new plant for the room. She'd decorated their new house with a lot of love and devotion. She'd done pretty much the whole house but he'd used her time away on a mission to turn one of the rooms upstairs into a little ballet studio with mirrors on the wall and a ballet barre. She'd had been so touched and happy that she'd jumped into his arms and they'd made love in her new ballet room. Natasha pulled him out of that nice memory. "How was it with Tony?"

"Intense. He babbled something about a project called Ultron but Pepper immediately said no."

Nat chuckled and kissed him again. Bucky made gagging noises. "Hello?! I'm still here!"

Steve sat down behind Nat and wrapped his arms around his wife. "Hey, Buck." He noticed that Nat had way more Monopoly money than Buck.

"Your wife is cheating! I don't know how but she is!"

"You're just mad that you're so bad at this!" Nat laughed and Steve buried his face in her hair to hide his grin. Bucky was a sore loser but Steve couldn't completely rule out that Nat _wasn't_ cheating.

Natasha decided to take a bath after Bucky had given her all of his Monopoly money and Steve really wanted to join her but he also wanted to enjoy a beer with Buck.

"How nice of you to stay here with me when I know that you rather want to rub your wife's back." Bucky teased.

"Shut up." He replied like a grown up and took a sip from his beer.

His best friend laughed. "I still can't believe you're a married man. This life suits you. I always knew you were meant to be a husband."

"Thanks?"

Bucky laughed and they finished their beers in a comfortable silence. He was so grateful that Bucky was back and safe. That he had his free will back and could do whatever he wanted. Bucky left with the comment that he should go before Steve would kick him out so he could do his marital obligations. Steve rolled his eyes at him but he immediately jogged up the stairs when Bucky was gone.

Natasha was in their bedroom sitting in front of her vanity and braiding her long red hair into a braid. She saw him in the mirror and smiled. "Bucky gone?"

"Yup."

"Good." Natasha smirked and stood up so he could see what she was wearing. She wore a dark green satin babydoll that made her legs look extra long.

"New?" He licked his lips. She looked incredible. She always did.

"Yup. You like it?" She did a little twirl and he nodded eagerly. How could he not? She was his dream girl and he was the luckiest guy in the whole world that she wanted _him_. "Then show me." She whispered and fell down on their bed.

* * *

He was sitting on the couch sketching a portrait of Natasha for her birthday when he heard her coming home. They had the day off and Natasha had left in the morning saying she had errands to run. He had been a bit disappointed because he'd hoped to spend the day with her in bed. He closed his sketch book and walked into the hallway.

"Hi, sweetheart."

"Hi." She pointed at two pizza boxes on the dresser. "I got dinner."

He took the food and brought it to the living room where he sat it on the table. "How was your day?"

"Good." His wife answered who followed him. "I...I have a surprise for you."

"Okay?" He sat down on the couch and Nat joined him with her purse in her lap. "What is it?"

She pulled something out of her purse and handed it to him. It was her passport. Why was she giving that to him. "Look inside." She was a mix between pride and nervousness.

He did as he was told but didn't get what she meant with all of this. He glanced over the info and then looked twice. _Natasha Rogers_ was written there.

"What?"

"I changed my name. The paperwork is finally through."

"You didn't...I never expected you to take my name."

She smiled. "I know and I didn't do it for you. I did it for me. Romanoff or Romanova was never my name, just an alias given by the Red Room and then Fury. It has no meaning to me. It's just a name. But Rogers...That's who I wanna be. I wanna be the person good enough to carry that name. It's the name of my family. Of my home and heart. I _want_ to be Natasha Rogers."

"Nat..." He tried to blink his tears away. He was so moved that she'd chosen _his_ name as her new one. "I...Thank you for thinking that my name is worthy of that."

She smiled. "Thank you for thinking that I'm worthy of that name."

He pulled her into his arms. "So you're Mrs. Steve Rogers now?" He asked with a grin.

Natasha elbowed him in the stomach. "I'm _Natasha_ Rogers, dork."

He laughed and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "Fine by me. Fine by me, sweetheart."


	66. Hi (Part IV)

_Turns out I can't let go of this universe yet, lol._

* * *

 _2017_

It was Winter and fucking cold outside. Steve had always loved the winter even though he'd gotten especially sick during the time but he'd loved to go ice skating or have snowball fights with Bucky when he had been healthy enough for it. But then he'd crashed a plane into the ice and missed seventy years of being with his one true love.

Said one true love mumbled something in her sleep and pressed herself closer to him to soak up his heat. He smiled down at her and pulled up the blankets up Natasha was covered by them up until her face. She hated the cold and was freezing all the time. Not that she admitted that to anyone besides him. She clung to him when they were alone and he loved that she snuggled against him to warm up.

He checked the time and they had to get up soon to be punctual for the weekly team meeting at Avengers Tower. "Sweetheart." He pressed a kiss on the top of her head. "Wake up."

"Ngh." Natasha murmured and buried her face in his chest. He had the suspicion that Natasha was a little bear and needed hibernation to survive the winter. He rubbed his hands in circles over her back. "Can we just stay in bed all day? It's still dark outside." She mumbled into his shirt.

He laughed and squeezed her cute ass. "I can make you pancakes. Or French toast. How about waffles? What do you want to eat?"

Natasha moved her head up to look at him. She looked adorable with her tousled hair and sleepy eyes. She blinked a few times and then gave him a wolfish grin. Looked like his wife was waking up. "What do _you_ wanna eat?" She wiggled her eyebrows. "Me?"

"That was terrible." He laughed and rolled her onto her back and moved down her body until he was with his head between her legs. "I can't believe I married such a dork. And people think you're scary." He winked at her and Natasha grinned and patted his head before he pulled her pyjama pants and panties down.

Natasha looked very happy with herself while she watched him make them breakfast. She made horrible innuendos that made him more laugh than anything else but it didn't stop him from throwing a giggling Nat over his shoulder and marching with her into the bathroom. The shower was filled with hot steam, laughter and soft moans and they stayed inside until the hot water was gone.

"Just what I needed to get through a meeting with Stark." Natasha sighed and arched her back. He chuckled and stepped into his boots. Natasha came over to him swaying her hips but it looked more adorable than sexy in her snow boots. "I love you." She whispered and hugged him. "I love you so much."

She always told him that she loved him before they left the house. She never said those words out loud when they were in public. "I love you, too."

She smiled softly and pulled his head down. "Can we have a date night tonight?" She asked before kissing him.

"Of course. Anything you want."

Natasha grinned. "Good, I already have an idea."

The weekly meeting took hours with the whole team going over situations that might needed the Avengers to intervene and going over potential new recruits. They had video conferences with the President and then the UN General Secretary and it was pretty late when they could finally go home.

"It's a bit late to book a table somewhere." He noticed when he and Natasha left the tower.

"We have everything we need at home." She said with a soft smile and got into the car where Happy was waiting for them and drove them home. Natasha told him not to come into the living room until she called for him and he waited in the bedroom wondering what she was up to now. He heard her calling his name and he came back downstairs. She'd moved the furniture around and the fire place warming the room. An sheet was in front of it and she was just wearing a rope.

"Nat?" He asked a bit confused.

She pointed at paint tubes and brushes on the coffee table and let her robe fall to the ground. "I want you to draw on me. Do you want to?"

He swallowed and nodded. "Yeah."

"Great." She smiled. "These paints are especially made for skin, so don't worry." She lowered herself onto the sheet in front of the fire place. "Come on, darling. Draw on me like one of your French girls."

He chuckled and got out of his clothes until he was only in his boxer briefs. He took the paint and a brush and started to draw. Inspired by her tattoo he covered her entire body in flowers. She looked like garden Eden to him. She was his paradise. His wife shivered when the brush touched sensitive parts of her skin and she was looking at his face the entire time while he was using her as a canvas.

"I think I'm done." He leaned down to kiss her. "Thank you."

"My phone is over there so you can take pictures. But don't show them to anyone or you're sleeping on the couch forever, mister!" She quipped, knowing that he would never let anyone see her like this. He kissed her again before he grabbed her phone. Nat posed for him and the took dozen of pictures and showed them to her. "Wow, you're so good at this. It looks beautiful."

" _You_ look beautiful." He corrected and Natasha beamed. They took a long and hot bath together and shared a pie after they cleaned up the living room. Natasha fell asleep as soon as they went to bed (little bears needed their sleep) and he held her tightly thanking his lucky stars that he ended up with this amazing and perfect woman.

* * *

"Are you two ever gonna have a real wedding?" Bucky asked him when he was over to the watch the game with him. Bucky had been too furious when he'd found out that the Dodgers were now in LA.

"Hm?"

"Didn't you say that you wanted to have a party at the Bartons or something like that when your life was more quiet?" Bucky asked, looking guilty. Neither he or Nat had ever told him that he had been the reason for their shotgun wedding but he'd figured it out on his own. "Look with the paybacks from the Army...I can pay for a second wedding for you guys."

"Buck-"

"No, let me do this. You've been talking about your wedding to her since the war. It's my fault you never had a real wedding."

"No, Buck. It's not your fault and I think our wedding was perfect. Not everyone we wanted was there but it was still very romantic. We're both not the people for a big fancy wedding. Nat was right when she said that she just wanted to be married to me. We're married and that's all I care about."

"Then let me pay for a honeymoon!"

"We don't want your money. I appreciate it but it's not necessary."

Bucky stayed after the game still trying to convince him to let him give them a wedding or honeymoon. It was very sweet of him, but they didn't need that. They had been married for almost two years and Nat had never mentioned another wedding again.

"Hi, boys." Natasha yelled from the hallway and he got up to greet his wife. She had problems to get out of her boots and he helped her out of them. Natasha laughed and pulled him down to kiss her. It was still cold outside but at least there was no snow or ice. "Did you guys win?"

"No." He laughed and kissed her forehead.

"Oh." Natasha said and stood up from the little bench in their hallway. "Well, I got you something on my little shopping trip with the girls." He knew that Natasha still had a small problem to adjust to the fact that she had friends now. Multiple friends and even female ones.

"You didn't have to get me anything, sweetheart."

"I saw the leather jacket and just had to get it for you." She slung her arms around his neck. "You can show me your gratitude in the bedroom later. Remember when you tied me to the headboard and-"

"God, stop!" Bucky yelled from the living room. "Steve's not the only one with enhanced hearing. I don't wanna hear this stuff! _Yuck_!"

Natasha grinned and rose to her tiptoes to whisper into his ear what she wanted him to do to her later tonight. His ears were still pink when they walked into the living room. He really hoped that Bucky hadn't heard that, it was no one's business what they did in the bedroom.

Bucky offered again to pay for a second wedding or a honeymoon but Natasha politely turned down his offer. His best friend seemed more convinced when Natasha said no this time.

He was putting the dishes into the dishwasher when Natasha padded into the room. "A vacation would be nice. We haven't been on one in ages." She said, wrapped her arms around his waist. "Just you and me somewhere warm where I don't have to wear three pairs of socks. Like a tropical island."

"That sounds great." He agreed and kissed her. Their only vacation had been in London when he'd asked her to marry him. "You think Buck would spring for a tropical island?"

She laughed. "I don't want him to pay for that."

They decided to go to Mauritius and had a wonderful time. They explored the island and went swimming and diving, enjoyed long walks on the beach, found out that making love on a beach sounded better than it actually was (he cringed when Nat complained that she had sand _everywhere.)_ and just focused only on each other. He liked it the most when they were entangled in a hammock looking at the ocean and were just together. He found out that Natasha had freckles when she was in the sun for a long time and he was just charmed by it.

"Do you think we'll retire one day?" Nat asked her eyes still on the beautiful ocean in front of them. "Retire and buy a house at a beach?"

"Do you want that?" He whispered into her hair that smelled like sea salt and coco nuts.

"Yeah. Some day just you and me living somewhere warm." She craned her neck to look at him. Her eyes were shining and she smiled softly. "I don't have to share you with anyone and we'll make love all day."

"All day, huh?" He chuckled and kissed her forehead. "Sounds very optimistic. I'm not getting any younger. I'm turning 100 next year. Maybe three times a day will be realistic."

Natasha snorted and pressed a kiss to his jaw. "That's not enough. It's never going to be enough, I'll always want more of you. And we're going to be young pretty much _forever_. But can you imagine hanging the shield up and letting someone else save the world?"

"Yes." He said immediately. "I don't wanna live this life forever. One day we retire and just live our life. You and me, making love all day on a beach."

"But please on a blanket. I took me hours to get rid of the sand!" She punched his chest and then laid her head on it. "But that sounds nice. Just you and me enjoying our life together."

"Do you think we'll _ever_ age?" He whispered.

"I don't know. Bruce doesn't seem to think so." Natasha must have sensed his confusion. "I asked him since he's the expert on the topic. Our serums are fighting against the aging process since it's a weakness."

"So you're be still wearing tiny bikinis way into your two hundreds? Those things should be illegal." He asked, tugging on the waist band of her bikini panties, but he almost shivered when he thought about _how long_ they could be together. He really had an eternity with her. He somehow knew that still wouldn't be enough. His hand slipped into her bikini bottom to brush his finger over her tattoo.

"You're such a man sometimes." She laughed and snuggled closer to him and they both took a nap.

* * *

Natasha decided to throw Bucky a party for his 100th birthday and rented out a bar. Bucky didn't show it but Steve could tell that he was moved by it. The whole team came and Natasha was very intent to have Bucky and Pepper's new assistant Darcy Lewis talk to each other all evening.

"Are you trying to set them up?" He asked with a grin while he joined her at the bar where she was making herself a drink.

"What? Me?" She replied with a sly grin on her face. She held her drink up to him so he could take a sip. "Good?"

"Yeah. But you didn't answer my question, sweetheart."

Nat laughed and took his hand to play with his wedding band. "You know me so well, husband of mine. Lewis just mentioned what a beefcake Bucky is and that she needed to get laid."

"Nat!"

"What? Her words, not mine. And don't you think that Buck deserves some happiness? Darcy is not looking for something serious, just some fun and that could be good for Bucky. I know he's not ready for a real relationship. Maybe something happens between them, maybe not." She cupped his jaw with her hand and turned his head into the direction of the small dance floor. "They look comfortable with each other." Nat was right. Darcy was making silly dance moves around Buck who was laughing.

"Okay, you have a point." He admitted and leaned down to kiss her. "Have I told you how good you look tonight?"

"You did. I know you have a thing for my legs in short skirts." She grinned and ran her hands up and down his arms. "And I have a thing for you in too tight button downs. You wanna check out the bathrooms here?"

"You have to pee?" He asked dumbly.

"God, you're so cute sometimes." She took his hand and on their way to the rest room he realized what she meant. Half an hour later they stumbled out of the bathroom and ran into Tony who gave them a smug grin clearly knowing what he and Nat had been doing in that bathroom.

Bucky and Darcy were still talking and maybe something good could happen between them. God knew that Bucky deserved it. His best friend thanked Natasha again for the party before she swung her leg over Steve's bike and sat down behind him and he drove them home. Darcy and Bucky only went on a few dates until they both decided to just be friends but Steve could see that it had been good for his best friend to put himself out there again.

He was checking if all the doors and windows were locked while Natasha was upstairs in the bathroom cleaning herself up and getting ready for bed. She just came into the bedroom when he came back to her. They both slid into bed and Natasha snuggled against him

"You already know what you wanna do for your 100th?" Natasha asked and kissed his neck. "I wouldn't be surprised if the mayor or even the President want to throw you a big party next year."

"Oh God, I don't want that." He hated that kind of attention. He always shut down Tony's idea to go on Late night shows. He just wanted to do his job and then go home. "I don't want a party. Just a day off with my girl. That's all I want."

He felt her smile against his skin. "I think that can be arranged. And what do you want for your 99th birthday this year?"

"Just a day off with my girl." He told her truthfully.

"I'm seeing a pattern here." She chuckled and kissed his neck again. "I won't be mad if you wanna do something with the guys."

"That's sweet, but I missed so many birthdays with you. I wanna spend every next one with you. With my wife. With the person I love most in the world."

"You're such a sap." Natasha replied sleepily but he heard in her voice that she was happy about that. Maybe he was a sap but he hated it when he was away from her. And if it was just for a day or two because of a mission. They had spent enough time apart from each other. He had the luxury of sleeping through the seventy years but his Natalia had to live with that pain every single day. She barely spoke about that time but he knew that it had been very painful for her. She'd admitted one night that she'd almost hated Laura and Clint in the beginning because they had something she'd thought she could never have. He tightened his hold around her and Natasha sighed in her sleep. God, he loved this woman so much.

* * *

Natasha had broken her ankle during a mission in Pakistan and was on bed rest which she did not like _at all_. She healed faster than normal people but she was still on break for at least a week. Today was only day four and she had been pretty grumpy this morning when he'd left for a training session at the Tower.

"Sweetheart?" He yelled through the house when he came home. He looked for her in the living room where she had been when he'd left the house this morning.

"I'm here!" Natasha answered from the little patio outside.

"Hi, sweetheart." He leaned down to press a kiss on her hair. She was sitting on a lounge chair with her laptop on her lap. "What are you looking at?"

"Just browsing the internet." She replied and puckered her lips. He chuckled and gave her a kiss. "How was your day?"

"Good. Training was very good. Rhodey is a great addition to the team. I'm glad he finally caved in and joined us." He sat down on the other chair. "How was your day?"

"Boring! I pretty much just watched Netflix and then limped outside when the sun came out." She closed her laptop. "I hate being like this!"

"I know, but it won't be for long. You're probably back on your pretty little feet next week."

Natasha snorted. "Do I detect there a little foot fetish?"

He rolled his eyes. "No."

She stretched her healthy leg out and wiggled her toes. "Are you sure?"

"Yup. What do you want for dinner? I think we still have some tuna steaks in the freezer."

"Sounds good but before that you have to make out with me." She grinned and leaned back. He pretended like it was a burden to humor Nat but he had no problem to lower himself carefully onto her and spent the next twenty minutes or so to kiss her deeply. Natasha's cheeks were flushed and her lips swollen. "Hm, you're such a great kisser. I think my ankle would heal so much quicker if you'd kiss me all day."

"I got no plans tomorrow." He whispered and kissed her until her stomach started to growl. He pulled away with a chuckle and left to make dinner for them. Natasha followed him and jumped onto the kitchen counter and ordered him to make out with her until the dinner was done.

He stayed the next day at home with her and they spent most of the day kissing and cuddling. Natasha tried a few times to get into his pants but he stopped her every time chuckling and kissing her to distract her from her mission. They read a book together and discussed it after they were done. Natasha's weird brace thing for her ankle designed by Dr. Cho was removed a week later and Natasha attacked him the moment they stepped into their house to have her way with him.

It surprised him when Natasha started to tell him about things that she'd done while he had been in the ice. She usually never shared stories about that time since she somehow feared that he'd think less of her which was not possible. He knew that she'd had no free will and wouldn't have done those things if she'd had a choice.

"Do you wanna go clubbing with me?" She once asked him over lunch at a bistro near the Tower. "You've been acclimated to this time and I'm wondering if you're ready for a club."

"Um...where's that coming from?" She'd never gone clubbing since they gotten together. And they were reunited for almost five years now.

"I love dancing, you know that." She smiled. "I just like the energy in a club. The music and all those people around you dancing. You can just let yourself loose to the music."

"Am I...Aren't you going clubbing because of me?" He asked, feeling guilty.

"No! I rather spend time with my husband then go out alone but I thought that you're maybe comfortable enough to try it? We don't have to go if you don't want to!"

"No, no. I'll try it." He promised. He would do it for her. The thought of going to a club was a bit scary but he'd do it for her. Maybe he'd like it, even though he was a terrible dancer.

"You know, I was a Go-Go dancer in the sixties." She laughed. "I had the boots and dress and everything. It was a cover for an op but I made a lot of money during that time. And I had to pose as a stripper in the nineties. You want me to give you a show tonight? A lap dance maybe?"

"You don't have to do that." He reached over the table to hold her hand. "You never have to do that." She had still been working for the Russians in the nineties so that meant that she hadn't done the stripper job because she'd wanted to.

"I know." She smiled sweetly. "That's why I'm offering. I know that you'll never make me something that I don't want to. But I want to do that for you. I think you'll like it."

And from that day on, Natasha told him more about her past, she left the bloody details out but she shared more with him. The show he got that night had was great and them going clubbing was _interesting._ He had no idea how to move but Natasha put his hands on her waist and started to move to the music. Several girls hit on him while he was _basically grinding with his wife_ on the dance floor and Natasha got so annoyed by the whole thing that she dragged him home and pushed him onto the bed crawling on top of him.

"Nat, I'm sorry." He whispered.

"It's not your fault. You did nothing wrong." She said and ripped his shirt open. "But you are _mine."_

 _"_ Forever." He promised and let Natasha do to him whatever she wanted. They blasted club music through their living room the next night and Natasha showed off dance moves that made his jeans pretty tight.

* * *

 _2018_

Natasha stormed down the hallway towards the room they would be staying at during their time at the _Playground_. They all had been shocked that Coulson was still alive, but he knew that it had hit his wife the hardest. She acted like it was no big deal and but as soon as the meeting was over she left Coulson's office. He didn't know what he should think about SHIELD still existing, but he had more important things to do now. His wife was upset and hurt and she needed him.

He opened the door and poked his head through. "Do you want to be alone?"

She was standing in the middle of the room with her back to him, hugging herself. "You're the only one I want to see right now."

He shrugged his leather jacket off and threw it on the bed before he made his way over to her. He turned her around and pulled her into a hug. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

She buried her face into his shirt. "No."

"Okay." He simply answered and held her as long as she needed him to walking them to the bed sitting down. Natasha crawled into his lap and buried her face into the crook of his neck. "I'm here."

"Thank you." She mumbled. "You're the only one who trusts me."

"Clint trusts you. And Bucky does too. Everyone on the team does."

"But you're different. You'll always honest with me. You wouldn't have let me believe that you were dead for five years. You would have come to me."

He rubbed his hand over her back hoping it was soothing. "That's true." Nothing could have kept him away from her. _Nothing_. "I'm not defending him, but I think he thought he was doing the right thing."

"Coulson always took me out to dinner on my birthday. He got me books and CDs while I was in containment after I deflected. He let me sleep on his couch after I was released from custody and didn't have a place yet. I thought he cared about me. I almost told him about you. He admired you so much and said you were his moral compass and I let it almost slip that I knew you. Coulson knows my real age. I trusted him. I _mourned_ him!"

He didn't know what to tell her. So he held her tighter and let her deal with her inner struggle. He knew that she wouldn't cry, but he could feel how upset and hurt she was.

He searched for Coulson while Natasha was in the gym letting her frustrations out on May and Morse who'd also known that Coulson was still alive. He found the new director of SHIELD still sitting in his office. He just walked in without knocking on the door.

Coulson looked up. "Oh, I thought you were Romanoff." Steve didn't bother to tell him that her name was Rogers now.

"She won't come to you. You should know that." He said sharply and sat down on the chair in front of Coulson's desk.

"I thought she changed." Coulson pointed at Steve's wedding ring. "I never thought that she would get married. She is _your_ wife, right? Or are two married to other people?"

"No, she's my wife."

"And she's happy?" Coulson asked hesitantly like he was unsure if he was allowed to ask that. "I always wanted her to find peace."

"I think so. She says that she happy. And she would _never_ lie to me."

Coulson sighed. "I wanted to tell you, but Fury ordered me not to. I was following orders. You people can understand that."

"Don't try to pull me into this. You hurt her deeply. She was devastated when you died. She didn't show it at SHIELD, but she was heartbroken over your death."

"I didn't realize you two had become friends so quickly after New York."

 _Shit. "_ I guess we're kindred spirits. You have to apologize to her. She thinks you never cared about her."

"What? Of course, I do. She's like a dau- She's very important to me. I wanted to tell her, but Fury said she was fine. Said that she was working with you and everything was going well. He even said that he had the suspicion that you two were more than partners." Coulson smiled a little. "I'm really glad that she has you. I always hoped that she would open herself up to finding someone. But she always said that there had only been one man for her and he'd died years ago." Coulson furrowed his eyebrows. "I always wondered who she was talking about. Has she ever said anything to you?"

He wouldn't tell Coulson that _he_ was that man. "I'm not going to talk with you about Natasha's private life. She's my wife, I won't betray her trust."

"That's fair, I guess."

Coulson offered him a drink but he was in no mood to have one with a man who'd hurt his Natasha. He could understand that Coulson had been following orders but if Steve had learned one thing than that it was never smart to trust Fury blindly. He left Coulson's office after reminding him in his Captain America voice that he had to talk to Natasha.

Natasha was already in their room for the night when he got back. She was lying on the bed staring at the ceiling. He got out of his jeans and joined her. He was relieved when she moved to drape herself around him. "How are you?" He asked and breathed in the scent of her shampoo.

"Better. I got to kick May and Bobbi's asses so that lifted my spirit. We're good." She gave him a knowing look. "You talked to Phil, didn't you?"

He brushed her hair out of her face. "Yeah. I told him to talk to you. He knows that he hurt you. He's sorry even though he has a hard time admitting it." He ran his fingers over her arm. "You told Coulson about me?"

"Hm? No."

"You told him there was a man but he died."

"Oh." Her hand on his shoulder gripped him harder. "He had been bugging me to go out and meet someone. Telling me to just go on dates and I got angry at him. I couldn't just go on dates. Not when I was still in love with my sweet Steve." She smiled sadly. "So I told him that much so he would drop the topic. And he did."

Natasha now seemed even more upset that she had shared this with Coulson and he just told her stories about his mother to calm her down. He told her about the many times his mother had been done with him when he'd gotten into trouble again. God, he wished that his mother could have met Natasha. Both women had made him into the man he was today. It hurt a little to talk about his ma, but the real smile on his wife's face was worth it. And Sarah Rogers should be remembered.

Together with Coulson's team they managed to capture the enhanced individuals without any casualties on both sides. He saw how Coulson took Natasha to the side when they were back at the playground and she only came back when they were ready to board the jet.

"Coulson still alive?" Tony quipped before he disappeared into the cockpit. Natasha glared at him before she sat down next to Steve.

"And?"

"We talked. I'm still a bit pissed, but I don't want to waste energy on it. What's done is done." She smiled a little. "It's okay. You don't have to worry about me."

"Do you want me to go back and beat him up for you?" He joked and Natasha shook her head in amusement. She looked around and he knew that it was to make sure that no one was paying attention to them and kissed him.

"My dork." She whispered and intertwined their fingers.

* * *

"Okay, you have to go!" Natasha laughed between kisses, but didn't pull away from him. He chuckled and pressed her against the wall in the hallway. "Steve, you're going to be late!"

"Mhm." He agreed and kissed her again, his hands touching her everywhere he could. He would be in DC for the next few days and he didn't really want to leave his wife. "You think they'll notice if I don't come?"

"No, _of course_ not. People won't notice if Captain America is not at a security conference where he's supposed to represent the Avengers." She laughed and slid her hands under his shirt. "You'll be only gone for three days, darling." She ran her nails over his stomach and he shivered. His wife was a little tease! She knew how much he liked that! "I'll make you your favorite dinner when you're back. I might even wear something _nice_ for you. Maybe something black and lacy?" She grinned and pulled his head down to kiss him. "Now go before Hill tries to kick in the door."

He cupped her beautiful face and basked in the way she looked at him. "I love you."

"I love you." She smiled and took his left hand to take his ring off since there would be press and they didn't want the world to know about their marriage. Their relationship was sacred. "Now give me one more kiss." He pressed their lips together and kissed her forehead before he took his suitcase and walked out of the front door.

He'd managed to leave the conference sooner and he was on his way home. He knew that there had been no missions so Natasha should be at home and he couldn't wait to see his girl. He had never been a fan of the political side of this job and he'd shaken enough hands for the time being. He paid the cab driver and left the car. He walked up the stairs of their house thinking that they could maybe go out for milkshakes or something. The weather was nice and warm and a little date sounded lovely.

He unlocked the door and typed in the code into the alarm system. He turned around and _what the fuck?!_ A black cat was sitting on the carpet in the hallway hissing at him. Did it get in through the terrace door?

"Liho, Liho? Where are y-" Natasha came into the hallway and she looked at him with wide eyes. The cat immediately ran to her and rubbed its head against her shins. " _Fuck_! What are you already doing here?!"

"I wanted to surprise you!" He pointed at the animal. "Who is that?"

"I found her yesterday while I was out." Natasha picked the cat up and looked sheepishly at him. "I took her to the vet and everything. I named her Liho. Can we keep her?"

"I thought you didn't like animals?"

"This is not an animal, this is Liho!"

Was that supposed to make sense? The cat, _Liho_ , purred loudly while Nat was absently stroking her back. "I feel like you two are already thick as thieves. I'm not kicking your cat out."

" _Our_ cat." She corrected and walked over to her. "Come and pet her. Her fur is very soft!" He lifted his hand but the cat started hissing again. "Hey, stop that!" Natasha chided her and let her down. "I guess she thought it was just us girls. She'll learn to love you." She looped her arms around his neck. "Since I love you so much."

"I'm still your number one?" He asked with a grin and pulled her into a deep kiss. "Hi, sweetheart."

"Hey. I missed you." She whispered against his lips, jumping up and wrapping her legs around his waist. "Take me upstairs, Captain."

"Yes, ma'am." He jogged up the stairs and got into the bedroom kicking the door shut so their new roommate wouldn't disturb them. They were necking like teenagers on their bed and he just got Nat out of her top admiring her new bra when a loud whining from outside interrupted them. Nat looked to the door, but he quickly kissed and sucked on her neck. "Ignore it. She'll go away."

"Okay." His wife sighed and pressed her chest against his. The whining and crying got louder and Natasha pushed him off of her and stood up to let the cat into the room. Liho jumped onto the bed and he could swear that the cat was glowering at him. Natasha pulled her shirt back on and sat down on the bed to pet the cat. Liho looked very pleased with herself.

"You know you'll have to share her with me, right? She's my _wife_!" He complained.

Nat laughed and blew him a kiss. "I'll make it up to you when's she napping. Cats sleep like twenty hours a day."

He and Liho coexisted around each other. They both loved Natasha so they tried to tolerate the other one. He wasn't insecure or anything but he did ask his wife from time to time if he was still her number one.

* * *

"You can't hide here forever, Steve." Bucky told him for the hundredth time. "Go home to Natasha. She's calling me all the time. Steve, please. Just talk to your wife. She loves you, you know that. I know you're...I know it's hard but you have to forgive yourself. It wasn't your-"

"Don't. Don't finish that sentence!" He barked and looked finally up. "Don't say it wasn't my fault. It was! I...I almost killed my _wife_ , Buck! I can still feel-" He shook his head. He didn't want to think about what had happened last week.

"You weren't yourself." Bucky sat down beside on the bed in his guestroom where Steve had been hiding since he had been released from the Tower. "You weren't in control. We both know that _you_ would _never_ hurt Natasha. You would rather die."

He closed his eyes, feeling disgusted with himself. "It were _my_ hands wrapped around her throat choking the life out of her. It was _me_ who almost crushed her windpipe. I almost killed the person I love more than anything in the world. What kind of man does that make me?"

"The same kind as me and Barton." Bucky sighed. "An alien, a _god_ , put her spell on you and controlled your mind. You heard Thor, not even his kind could resist her powers. It wasn't your fault what this Lorelei chick did to you."

"I don't wanna talk about it anymore." He lied down on the bed, staring at the ceiling. He felt so guilty and disgusted by himself. This sorceress had infiltrated his mind and made him forget about Natasha. He hadn't remembered his love for her and hadn't even batted an eyelash when Lorelei had told him to kill her when she had found out that they were married. If he closed his eyes, he could still feel her losing her strength underneath his hands. The way she'd looked at him with red eyes, choking out that she loved him and that they were meant for each other. Her faith hadn't faltered while he'd tried to kill her. He'd hesitated enough when she'd said that she was his Natalia and they'd known each other forever that Thor had used that moment to get him off Natasha. That hit had cleared his head and he'd realized what he'd done. Natasha had been heavily breathing, trying to get air into her lungs, and Sam had been by her side putting an oxygen mask over her face.

How could he go home? How could he go back and sleep in the same bed as her? He couldn't make her sleep in the same bed as him! He almost killed her! A little longer, a little more pressure and she would have been _dead_. How could he have forgotten her? What she meant to him? She had _never_ forgotten him in all those years of torture and mind wipes and he'd forgotten her after a run in with an Asgardian. What kind of man did that make him? What kind of _husband_? Natasha was better off without him. He was a _danger_ to her! What if something like this happened again and this time he would kill her?

Natasha should file for divorce. She was better off without him. She would realize that one day.

Natasha showed up at Bucky's door two times asking, almost begging, him to let her see Steve. He heard his best friend comfort her but he didn't let her in. Bucky stopped talking to him after the second time he sent Nat away. Sam and Tony also came by but he refused to see them. He should probably officially leave the team and New York. Natasha could have the house and Liho (not that the cat ever liked him) so she wouldn't be so alone. He should probably leave town soon since it was only a matter of time until Bucky would kick him out.

It was the middle of the night and he couldn't sleep as usual when he heard how the window in his room got opened. He jumped up thinking someone was breaking in but then the scent of his wife was filling his nostrils. Natasha was climbing through the window and closing it when she was in the room.

"You should go."

"No." Natasha said, slipping out of her leather jacket and boots.

"What are you doing?" He asked perplexed and moved away until his back hit the wall.

"I haven't slept in days because my husband is not lying next to me in bed." She came slowly closer. "I'm done with you hiding here."

"No, stay where you are." He tried to press himself into the wall.

"Steve." She said softly, and God he missed her so much. "You're not going to hurt me."

"I almost killed you." He choked out, tears building in his eyes. "You almost died."

"But I didn't, because you pulled through in the end. That wasn't you. I know that you would never hurt me, darling." She was holding her hand out. He shouldn't, but he was itching to touch her. "You weren't in control. I know that feeling better than anyone. You said that what I did for the Red Room wasn't my fault. You said that Bucky isn't responsible for the actions of the Winter Soldier. You didn't blame Clint for what Loki made him do." She took his hand gently and carefully. "It wasn't your fault. But I still forgive you if you need my forgiveness. I forgive you, my love."

"Nat..." If he were a better man, he would have let her go in that moment. He would have broken up with her to protect her. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I...God, please forgive me. I...I never wanted to hurt you. She...she was so strong...I'm so fucking sorry." He fell to his knees and pressed his head into her stomach. God, how could he think that he was strong enough to leave her. He needed her more than anything.

"It's okay. Everything is okay. I forgive you, even though there's nothing to forgive. I love you, Steve. And I know that you love me."

"I do! I love you more than life itself." He mumbled into her shirt and his wife ran her hand through his hair.

"Let's try to get some sleep." She whispered and tugged on his shoulder to make him stand up. "I'm tired and I can't really sleep without you."

"Nat...Are you sure, Natalia?" He shouldn't share the bed with her. But he wanted to. He'd missed her so much. And she was here and she was...she was everything. She nodded and took his hand leading him to the bed. She pulled him onto the bed and made him lie with his back to her. "What-"

"You're the little spoon tonight." She wrapped her arm around his waist and pressed her whole body against his backside. He felt her press a kiss to the back of his neck. "Now go to sleep, darling. We're together and everything is okay."

"Okay." He mumbled and closed his eyes, finally being able to relax. _Everything was okay._

They slept until late afternoon and walked home, their hands intertwined. Liho was staring at him when they walked through the door and then ignoring him. Later when he and Nat were cuddling on the couch Liho came to them and laid down next to his thigh and let him pet her. Everything was okay. They would get through this.


	67. Hi (Part V)

Liho jumped off her cat tree in the living room and ran out of the room and Steve knew that Natasha was coming home. She had been with Sam and Rhodey for a week in Honduras and he'd missed her terribly. He knew that she could hold her own and that Sam and Rhodey had her back, but he preferred it when he was with her. Or at least Bucky. He knew that his best friend would be looking out for his wife, not that the others weren't but the trust he had in Bucky was different. It hadn't been an easy talk but he'd made Bucky promise him that he would look after Natasha if anything ever happened to him.

He heard Natasha's voice in the hallway and got up to greet her. She was kneeling down to pet Liho who was rubbing herself against Nat's shins. "I missed you too, you little furball." She laughed and stood up. "Hi, Steve."

She had a cut on her forehead and he frowned at that. "Are you hurt anywhere else?"

"No." She came to him and hugged him. "I'm okay. Don't worry."

He nodded and kissed her temple. "Hi." She looked up at him and he cupped her face to really kiss her. He could feel how Natasha relaxed against him and she returned the kiss with a sigh. "Are you hungry?"

"No. But I'd like some tea."

"Coming right up." He took her hand and walked with her into their kitchen to make her one. They sat down at the kitchen table and Liho used that chance to plant herself in Nat's lap. Natasha took a hot shower while he cleaned up and locked the doors. She was already in bed when he came upstairs and immediately wrapped herself around him like an octopus when he joined her in bed. He kissed her forehead and closed his eyes.

"I love you." She mumbled already half asleep.

"I love you." He whispered and ran his hand through her silky hair.

The next morning he woke up with a naked Natasha sitting on top of him with a wide grin on her face, his body immediately reacting to her. Liho was offended that no one was paying attention to her until late noon. He was pretty sure that the cat was giving him the stink eye when he refilled her water and food bowls and he wondered if she knew what he and Natasha had been doing upstairs.

A few weeks later his birthday was already around the corner. Natasha had been right and there had been plans to throw him a big party to celebrate his hundredth birthday but he'd politely turned it down. Tony wanted to throw him one at the Tower with just a couple of people but he knew that he and Tony had different ideas what a just _a couple of people_ meant. He thanked Tony but declined. He really just wanted to be with Nat.

He came home to all his friends sitting around the dining table celebrating his birthday earlier because his wife only told him that they would be out of town on the fourth of July. She looked very pleased with herself and wouldn't give him any clues. The dinner was perfect and all of his friends listened and didn't get him anything (Nat probably reminded them about it and no one was dumb enough to go against her).

The evening before his birthday Natasha disappeared into their walk in closet and came out with two suitcases and told him to carry them to the car. "Where are we going?"

"You'll see." She smiled and said goodbye to Liho who Bucky would check in on as she explained on their way to their SUV that they barely used. She got into the driver's seat and he sat down next to her. "It's just you and me for your birthday, darling. We have a few days until we have to be back in the city."

God, that sounded like heaven. He leaned back into his seat while Natasha started the engine.

She drove up north and they ended up in Montauk where she parked the car in front of a beach house. The next house was at least half a mile away. They were almost alone here. It was perfect.

Nat checked the clock. "Well, it's still a few minutes until your birthday, but this is my gift." She pointed at the house.

"Thank you, sweetheart. A few days just with you are the perfect gift." He took her hand to kiss her.

Nat chuckled. "That's good, but the house is my gift."

"What?!"

"I bought it. For us. For weekend getaways and one day we can live here." She smiled shyly. "This is our future."

He looked at the house and then at his wife. "Nat...I don't know what to say..."

"Just say thank you." She leaned over to kiss him. He whispered a thank you against her lips before he kissed her again. God, his Nat was amazing. The house looked perfect and he suddenly couldn't wait for retirement.

The four days at _their_ beach house were incredible. Natasha baked him a cake for his birthday and they had a BBQ and then watched the fireworks sitting on the roof of their house and later in bed she gave him hundred kisses all over his body. They explored the area and he really liked it here. Natasha had chosen the perfect place for them. He was pleasantly surprised when he saw that half of the clothes in Natasha's suitcase were lingerie that she modeled for him before they made love making sure to christen every room in their house. He was almost sad when they left but this was theirs now and they could come back whenever they wanted.

* * *

Natasha was doing yoga on their terrace with Liho watching her from a outdoor chaise lounge, when he came home after his meeting with Tony. He still couldn't believe what had just happened. He shook his head and watched Natasha do her routine and she grinned up at him through her legs before she picked up her mat and walked into the house.

"Hi, babe." She put the mat away and came over to him. "You wanna join me in the shower?"

"Hi." He pecked her lips and Natasha frowned.

"Okay, what's wrong."

"Tony." He sighed and sat down on the couch. Natasha joined him and threw her legs over his lap. "I met Spider-man today."

"We ran into him before on jobs in New York."

"No. I ran into his alter ego when I came into Tony's lab because he forgot about the meeting. Turns out that Spider-man is interning for him." Natasha raised an eyebrow. "Spider-man is a teenage boy who still goes to high school and he lives with his aunt in Queens. I recognized his voice when he introduced himself."

"Damn, I always thought he was young but not that young! And Tony knew?"

"Yeah, Peter asked him to keep it a secret. Tony thinks that he could do non-lethal missions for us. He's the one that made his new suit. I get that he wants to look out for the kid-"

"But he's still a kid. Every mission could turn lethal." Natasha nodded. "I'm not Tony's biggest fan, but he wouldn't put a child into any real danger."

"I know. It's just a kid should go to school and worry about grades and not _this_."

"Didn't you pick fights daily without any superpowers?"

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah, but that was different. Tony wants the kid to join the team, but I don't think that's a good idea. And his aunt doesn't even know about the whole thing."

"I don't think we should take him on missions that deal with international crises, but helping people in New York could be a good thing for the boy. He gets experience without really putting his life in danger and I'm sure that Tony has an eye on him."

He ran his hand over her calf. "Yeah, you're right. It's just...we're responsible for each other. Everything that happens is on us...And this life...it's dangerous. But you're right. This kid has abilities and he wants to use them to help people. That's a noble thing."

"I bet he was very excited to really meet you." Natasha grinned and sighed when he started to massage her foot.

"Yeah. It was kinda sweet." He chuckled thinking about how Peter almost knocked Tony out because he had been so excited. "He called me Mister Rogers. That was kinda weird."

Nat laughed. "He's just showing some respect for his elders. You _are_ a senior citizen."

He grabbed her to tickle her ribs. "Yeah? You're only six years younger than me, missy! You're a senior citizen, too!" He pushed her top up to _really_ tickle her and Natasha laughed and shrieked trying to get away from him. It was all fun and games until Liho attacked him to protect Natasha. She bit into his biceps with her tiny and _sharp_ teeth, and only slightly pierced his skin but Nat still insisted to clean the wound, even though the serum would prevent any infections, and sank to her knees to make him feel better.

Natasha wiped her mouth off and chided Liho when they came out of the bathroom with him still floating on air.

"Bad kitty!" She picked Liho up and pressed a kiss to her forehead. The cat looked like she knew where Nat's mouth had been just minutes ago because she didn't look very happy. "But thanks for having my back."

* * *

 _2019_

Seeing Bucky and Natasha fight was a blur out of red and metal. They were fast and, if it had been a real fight lethal. Bucky was stronger than Nat, but she was faster and used Bucky's own strength against himself. Buck landed on the mat more than he probably liked. Natasha was a formidable fighter and it amazed him every time to see her in action. She was force of nature.

Bucky landed again with a loud thud on the mat. "Okay, I had enough for today."

Natasha laughed and helped Buck up. Steve came closer to the ring and happily accepted the kiss that his wife gave him. "Good job. But Buck, you're dropping your right shoulder too much and your new thigh move needs a bit more finesse, Nat."

"We can practice later." Nat smirked and Bucky groaned in the background. Steve tried his best not to blush. Some of their sparring might had led to another kind of sparring in the past. He just liked being between her thighs.

Nat left to take a shower after they'd gone over the training schedule and he talked with Bucky about Sam's birthday and what they could do for him. Both men pretended to dislike each other but Steve knew that it was just show. His girl had said that they were jealous of each other but they both didn't mind that he spent most of his time with his wife. They agreed that a good burger or steak and drinks sounded perfect.

He realized that Natasha was still in the shower when he came into the locker room and decided to join her. He looked for the room she was using and got out of his gym clothes, took a towel, a change of clothes and opened the door to the shower. Natasha turned around and smiled at him. "I thought you'd never come."

"Still room for one in here?" He grinned and hang his towel up and dropped his clothes next to hers onto the bench. Natasha reached her hand out and he took it letting her pull him under the water stream. Some of Tony's designs were way over the top, but the man knew how to build great showers. The water was covering them both and he took a moment to admire the water running down Natasha's body. She was grinning smugly when he looked back up and pulled him into a kiss. He smiled against her lips and kissed her back.

"Do you want to wash my hair?" She whispered and he nodded. He took her shampoo and let a dollop fall into his palm before rubbing his hands together. He worked the foam into her hair, massaging her scalp and Nat was humming happily. He loved these little moments with her. He gently titled her head back to get all of the product out of her hair and then worked the conditioner in.

Natasha turned to face him when he'd washed everything out of her hair and kissed him again. His hands automatically landed on her bottom and she chuckled into his mouth before softly biting into his lower lip. He pressed Natasha against him hoping that they could-

"Don't even think about it, punk!" Bucky knocked loudly on the door. "This is a public space."

Natasha laughed and told Bucky to get lost. She took his shower gel and rubbed it into his skin. "Later, babe." She promised and continued to wash his body.

They were about to leave the tower when they ran into Pepper in the elevator. "Ah, Steve! Good that I run into you." Pepper said after greeting Nat with a kiss on the cheek. "I have a proposition for you. What do you think about your own art exhibit? We have the space and you could donate the money."

"Um.." He blinked in confusion. "I've never done something like that before."

"Can we get back to you about that?" Natasha asked.

"Of course." Pepper nodded and got out of the elevator before them. "Just call me when you thought about it, Steve."

He nodded and turned to Nat when they were alone. "Do you want to have your own exhibit?"

"I mean it was always my dream, but what if they only come because I'm Captain America?" He admitted in a small voice. He knew that the world cared more about Captain America than Steve Rogers.

Nat took his hand and laced their fingers together. "That's a possibility. But you are truly talented, darling. I wouldn't have framed your sketches and hung them if they weren't good." She smiled softly. "You have a talent and I think people will see that. If anything, critics will probably be especially picky because you are Captain America and they'll think you can't draw. And you don't have to do this. Pepper will understand."

"Yeah...But I think I want it. The money can go to charity and every artist dreams of having their own art show one day."

"Then do it. I'll be your date and I'll kick anyone's ass who says something mean about your work." He smiled down at her and they stepped out of the elevator. "But don't exhibit any of your drawings of me. Especially not the _sexy_ ones. I don't need the New Yorker art scene to know how I look naked. But I do wonder what the world would think if they knew that Captain America has dirty drawings of his wife."

"Shut up." He replied like a real adult, trying not to blush. Some of his drawings of Nat were pretty _explicit_ and he hid them in a special portfolio so no one would accidentally stumble upon them. "The world doesn't even know that I have a wife!"

Together they went through his drawings and sketches that evening and he decided to do the art show so he called Pepper after dinner to tell her the news.

Steve put the suit on that Natasha had laid on the bed and went to the art gallery while Natasha was still on the phone with Hill and the Secretary of State about a situation in Colombia. She'd promised to come to the exhibit as soon as possible.

He was nervous. Almost a hundred people with big wallets were invited to look at his work and to hopefully spend a lot of money that would go to the children hospital and the VA in Brooklyn. He went with Pepper and the curator over a few things until the first guests showed up. He shook hands with the rich and famous trying to do small talk with them. They asked him about his work and he tried to answer the questions as good as possible.

He had chosen with Nat the pieces for the exhibition and she'd agreed to exhibit one sketch of her. It was in black and white and only showed her backside so it was almost impossible to tell who it was. He was asked about the picture and the woman but he didn't give anything away. He wanted to play with his wedding ring like he always did when he was nervous but his ring was at home on his nightstand.

"Hey, man." He looked up and saw Bucky coming towards him. He excused himself from the mayor and his wife to greet his friend. "Wow! Look at all these fancy people!" Bucky grinned and gave him a hug. "I'm proud of you."

"Thanks, Buck." He said with warm cheeks. He couldn't really believe that this was happening. He'd never thought that he would have his own exhibit at an art gallery one day.

"Looks like you made it. You're not sick anymore. A renowned artist. And you actually found a girl who wanted to marry you. Sarah would be so proud."

"You think?" God, he wished his ma was here to see all of this.

"Of course. Well, she probably wouldn't be happy that you didn't marry a catholic girl. " Bucky laughed. "Speaking of her." He pointed at the entrance and Natasha was just walking through the door. God, she looked spectacular in her black dress that clung to her body nicely and accentuated her beauty. Her hair was in an elegant knot on top of her head and she wore darker eye make up as usual that made her eyes look even greener. She tottered on her stilettos towards him after she'd given her coat to the staff. "Don't let that jaw of yours hit the floor!"

He glared at his friend before he focused back on his wife. She came with a bright smile towards him. He almost pulled her into his arms to kiss her but he did remember that they were in public and that all eyes were on him tonight. She greeted him with a kiss on the cheek and then did the same with Bucky.

"Hi, boys."

"Hi." He whispered softly. "You look amazing."

Bucky snickered. "Dude, you're not being obvious at all."

Natasha laughed a little and asked if there was some place where they had some privacy. He led her to some kind of storage room and closed the door behind him. "Hi, darling." Natasha breathed out and then grabbed the collar of his blazer to kiss him. She kissed him deeply and he wrapped his arms around her. "I'm so proud of you."

"Thank you." He whispered and kissed her again. "I was really nervous."

"And now you're not?" She asked softly and rubbed a comforting hand over his bicep.

"Well, you're here now."

"Dork." She blushed a little and kissed the grin of his face. "Good thing I'm wearing kissproof lipstick today." She chuckled and kissed him again. "Now sell your work to collect money for kids and veterans and you might get lucky tonight." She bit her lip and he gulped. He didn't think that she would ever lose to have that affect on him. "I might have brought a new set of lingerie and maybe I'm already wearing it."

And with that she left the room and he tried to calm down. He couldn't just leave his own art show after half an hour because he wanted to see his wife in her new lingerie.

He heard people addressing Natasha as Miss _Romanoff_ and it felt so wrong. She was Natasha _Rogers,_ but only a handful of people knew that. They didn't want the public to know about their marriage because if the world knew then their enemies would know and would use it against them. Like Lorelei had done. He knew that Hydra would use Natasha to get to him if they knew that she was his wife. His best girl, his whole fucking world. She smiled at him every time their gazes met while she charmed the guests into biding for his work.

Sam and Rhodey arrived shortly after Nat and congratulated him on his work. Tony came fashionably late which earned him a from scowl from Pepper and even Hill showed up much to Sam's joy. He figured that they would leave together and that their _thing_ was currently on again.

It was after midnight when Pepper came to the table where he was talking to Rhodey and Nat with the latter rubbing her foot against his calf from time to time which make him grab his bourbon tighter.

"Congratulations, Steve." Pepper announced. "It was a great success. Everything is sold!"

"What?" He blinked at the woman and Nat slipped her hand into his.

"Yep. Especially the drawing of Natasha was very popular. Not that the buyer knows that it's her. It made the most."

"How much did we collect tonight?" Nat asked.

Pepper smiled warmly. "Almost two million dollars."

"What?!" He almost shrieked and Rhodey choked on his scotch.

"We made 1.92 millions dollars. Congratulations, Steve. You'll help a lot of people with that money."

"I'm so proud of you, darling." Natasha beamed brightly at him. "You are definitely getting lucky tonight. _Multiple_ times."

"I think that is our cue to leave." Rhodey laughed and led Pepper away from the table.

Holy shit! He'd never thought that they would get _that much_ money. They said goodbye to their friends and Happy drove them home. Nat told him to sit on their bed when she was standing a few feet away from him. She let her dress fall to the floor and stepped out of it. Yeah, that was _really_ nice lingerie.

"Okay, wow." He panted hours later when the sun was already coming up. "I think I'll sell my work regularly if this will happen every time."

Natasha laughed and hit his chest. "I thought you weren't getting any younger!" She grinned and pressed a kiss to his shoulder. "I'm very proud of you. Your work is amazing and it's worth every penny that it made last night."

"You think so? They didn't just pay so much because I'm, well, Captain America?"

"No." Her small and soft hand cupped his cheek. "No, I eavesdropped on their conversations. They were really surprised that you're such a talented artist. They paid because the paintings and sketches are incredible and not because you're a national icon." She pecked his lips. "I heard one artsy guy say that the woman in the black and white sketch must mean a lot to the artist. He said he could practically feel the love and devotion."

He smiled and kissed her again. "You mean everything to me. You always have and you always will, sweetheart." Natasha smiled and rested her forehead against his. "Now let's try to get some sleep before Liho kicks us out of bed."

* * *

"Uncle Steve, can you lift an elephant?" Lila asked him over breakfast. They were at the farm for Laura's birthday and he was still amazed that they actually managed to get the weekend off to visit Nat's family since the last weeks had been very hectic with work.

He looked over to his wife who was grinning into her coffee mug. "Uh, I don't know. Can't say I've tried it yet."

"Cooper said you can't, but I think you can!" The teenager shot his little sister a death glare.

"If I ever come into that situation, I'll let you know, okay?" He asked Lila who nodded. He could lift motor cycles and cars...How much did an elephant weigh?

Breakfast was over soon and Natasha offered to put Nate down for a nap. She put the toddler on her hip and went with him upstairs. Lila and Cooper followed their dad outside to feed the animals. So only he and Laura were left to clean up the breakfast table.

"I'm really glad you could make it." Laura smiled warmly. "It's been so long since you two were here."

Steve nodded. "Yeah, we're happy, too." He considered the Bartons his family now as well. And he loved it that the kids were calling him Uncle Steve since his wedding to Nat.

"You know I've been wondering about something for a while now. Well, actually for years." Laura said while she handed him dishes for the dishwasher.

"Okay?"

"Did you know Natasha from before? Well, did you two each other back in the day?"

He almost dropped the plate she'd handed him. "What?!"

"You were both born around the same time and...well, Natasha never dated anyone and then you show up and months later Clint tells me that Natasha has a boyfriend. I was pretty surprised by that. Don't get me wrong, you two are perfect together but it was so sudden."

"Uh-"

"It was love at first sight." Natasha was suddenly standing in the kitchen. "We looked at each other and that was it. It was like I had to wait seventy years to meet the right partner." She smirked a little. She was technically telling the truth. It had been love at first sight. But in 1944 and not 2012. And she did had to wait seventy years for him.

Laura smiled, but she didn't look completely convinced. "I wish I could say it was the same with Clint. It was probably his horrible hair cut." She laughed. "Nate asleep?"

Natasha nodded and Laura left the kitchen to check on her husband and kids. Natasha came to him and wrapped her arms around his waist and looked up at him with her chin on his chest. "I love Laura, but I don't want anyone to know about that."

He smiled down at her. "I know. Bucky knows, though."

"Yeah, because he was there the night we met." She chuckled darkly. "I promised him intense pain if he'd ever told anyone about that."

He rolled his eyes fondly at her and pecked her lips. "My hero." He joked and Natasha laughed before she pressed their lips together again. "Have you ever been on a tractor?"

"No."

She took his hand and led him out of the kitchen. "Then let's burrow Clint's and have a little tour."

Clint explained everything to him and with Nat in his lap they drove off the property and explored the area together. It was really beautiful where the Bartons lived and he enjoyed to do this little trip with his wife. Driving with Nat in his lap was probably not the safest way but he had sharp reflexes and the tractor wasn't that fast. They stopped at an field and Natasha suddenly had a blanket in her hand that she laid down on the grass. No one was here and they ended up making love in broad daylight much to Natasha's amusement.

She was laughing when they got back into their clothes. "What?" He asked her with a grin.

"Nothing." She shook her head with a big smile on her face. "You never cease to amaze me, darling."

"Oh, please!" He pulled her against him and played with the hem of her sundress. "You planned this whole thing. We both know that I can't resist you in those dresses."

Natasha grinned a pleased little smile and pecked his lips. "You know me so well, my darling." She purred and looped her arms around his neck. He lifted her up by his hands on her waist to even out the height difference. "We have to get back soon for Laura's party." She reminded him but kissed him with so much passion that it knocked the air out of his lungs."

"I love you, Natalia."

She smiled softly. "And I love you, Steve Rogers."

* * *

Natasha's birthday was around the corner and Steve was trying to come up with the perfect way to celebrate it. He knew that just like him she didn't like big parties so he objected to Pepper's idea to throw Nat a party at the tower. Maybe they could take a short trip up north to the beach house? It was cold since it was November but they could cuddle in front of the fireplace. Or maybe he could book a hotel room here in New York so Nat could get pampered with massages and stuff like that. He wanted to surprise her but he wasn't really good at it.

Natasha was on the couch with Liho in her lap watching the news when he came home. He sat down next to his wife and she snuggled against his chest. "So, your birthday is next week."

"Don't remind me." She sighed. "I'm turning 95. Only five years left until I'm hundred!"

"Hey, I'm 101!"

Nat laughed and pinched his thigh. "Well, you're a fossil!"

"And you're not?" He snorted. "Do you want to do anything special?"

"No. If we don't have to work then I just wanna stay home." She looked up at him. "Maybe you can make me your ma's roast?"

"Of course. There might be even a cake in it for you."

Maybe they jinxed it because Natasha had to leave the country two days before her birthday for a job and it didn't look like she would make it back in time. He tried to find a way to get to her but she was in the middle of an extraction of a former SHIELD agent and he would only jeopardize the whole operation. He knew that this was out of his hands and there wasn't anything that he could do, but he still felt like a failure. Nat would most likely not be able to celebrate her birthday and he felt like it was his job as her husband to make sure that she could.

Jarvis sent him a text that Nat's mission had been a success and Steve got an idea and texted the AI.

He prayed that he reached the hotel suite before Natasha. He wanted to be there before her to have everything done when she arrived in Paris. New York was closer to France than Vietnam so hopefully she wasn't there yet. And she wasn't when he got into hotel suite and checked the kitchenette out. It was small but everything he needed was there. He started to make his ma's roast and he'd just put it in the oven when then door opened.

"Hi." Natasha smiled.

"Happy birthday." He ran to her and lifted her up. "Happy birthday to the greatest person ever born."

She smiled and kissed him. "Thank you. And thank you for this. I think my birthday would have been over if I'd landed in New York."

"Well, we still have three hours and the roast is done in one."

Natasha raised an eyebrow and ran her nails over his clothed chest. "What are we gonna do with that hour?"

After dinner they sat down on their bed with view of the Eiffel Tower. Natasha snuggled against his chest and sipped on her champagne. "That was a great birthday."

"Yeah? Even though it were only three hours?"

Natasha looked up at him. "Even just one minute with you is the perfect birthday."

He kissed her softly. "Tomorrow we're going sightseeing and then I'm taking my girl on a date."

"Sounds lovely." She hummed and he realized that she was tired. He took her glass and she laid down on the mattress. He joined her after he put their glasses away and pulled her against his chest. He could give her her new necklace tomorrow.

* * *

 _2020_

Liho greeted him at the door with a bump of her little head against his shin when he came home. He'd spent the last days with a small team on a mission in Syria and was now back in Brooklyn. Natasha had been in DC for a conference and he hoped that she was already back.

"Natasha?"

"Bathroom!" She shouted back and after scratching Liho under her shin, he hung his shield on the wall and jogged upstairs to see his wife. He opened the bathroom door and found Natasha sitting in the bathtub. She'd lit candles and two wine glasses were on the edge of the tub.

"Hi, darling!" She smiled and a strain of her hair fell out of the knot on top of her head. "A litte birdie told me that you were back. Get naked and in the tub!"

"Yes, ma'am!" He saluted her and got out of his clothes and shoes. Natasha leaned forward and he sat down behind her with Nat leaning against his chest. "What a nice surprise!"

Natasha cocked her head to look up at him. "I know, right." She puckered her lips and he leaned down to kiss her. "I'm glad you're finally home."

"I was only gone for five days." He joked, even though he had missed her too.

"Felt like a lifetime." She sighed and handed him a glass of wine. "I was thinking that we'll enjoy this bath and then watch a movie?"

"Sounds perfect." He agreed and took a sip from his wine.

He slipped his wedding ring back on after their bath while Natasha chose a film. The pizza arrived when he came downstairs and the delivery guy's eyes went huge when Nat opened the door only in her silk robe. Steve glared at him and the boy took the money and left. Halfway into the movie he turned the TV off because his wife had fallen asleep and he carried her into their bedroom. He checked if everything was locked before he joined Natasha. God, he was the luckiest guy in the world that he got to sleep next to her every night.

"Building's empty, Cap!" Sam informed him over the comms. The team was in Sokovia raiding a Hydra base and they'd found human experiments. They got the people out of the building.

"Has anyone eyes on Rumlow?" As it turned out Rumlow was also Hydra and had been in Europe since Fury had fired him from SHIELD years ago.

"No."

"Could he be inside? Gone back?"

"I'll send Redwing to check, Cap." There was a pause while he waited for Sam's response. "Yeah, looks like he's in there. Wait...I think Natasha is also still in the building."

Steve pressed on his ear pierce. "Nat? Rumlow is inside. Be careful. Do not engage until you get further instructions."

" _Rogers_ that." Nat quipped back and he grinned to himself. His wife, the scary and lethal Black Widow, was just a huge dork.

He wanted to say something but then he heard a loud explosion. He turned around and saw how the building was crashing down. God, Natasha! He touched his ear piece. "Nat? Natasha? Do you copy? Nat? Natalia, answer me!"

Nothing. Oh God, he wanted to throw up. The whole building was gone. Just debris and ashes. Oh God! He ran as fast as he could to the giant rubble heap and threw wreckage over his shoulder to find a way in. She was still alive, he just had to get her out of there.

"Nat!"

He absently noticed his team members doing the same with Rhodey and Sam flying above them probably scanning the area to find Natasha. His hands were bleeding but he didn't care. He wouldn't stop until he'd found Natasha. He couldn't think any further. If she...No, she was okay. She had to be. He was too weak to live without her. He needed her more than anything.

"I think I found her!" Rhodey announced.

"Where?" He shouted back and looked up.

Rhodey pointed to the other side of the rubble pile. "Over there. I think she's in some kind of elevator? Or metal locker?"

He ran to the location and started to dig. Bucky rushed to his side to help him. He was glad that his best friend wasn't saying anything. They stopped when they found a broken freezer with a dent. He ripped the lid out of its angles and there she was. Natasha must have jumped into the freezer when she'd heard the explosion to protect herself from the blast. She was unconscious but she still had a pulse. He sighed in relief and Bucky helped him get her out of the freezer.

"Wait!"

"What?"

Bucky pointed at the bottom of the freezer. "There's blood. She's bleeding!"

 _Fuck!_ He carefully shoved his hand into the freezer and touched something wet on her left side. Something must have stabbed her but he didn't know what it was because there was nothing in the freezer. "Okay, we'll get her out on three." He said to Bucky who nodded. "One, two, three."

They lifted her out of the freezer and he tried to push any thoughts about how it resembled a coffin out of his mind. The quinjet was already there when he carried Natasha down the rubble pile. He placed her gently on the gurney and let Sam push him to the side so he could get to work. He cut her cat suit open and flushed the wound out. It look like it was caused by a knife. Not some pipe. Sam stapled her wound and then turned around to face him.

"She should be okay until we land at the nearest hospital. She needs to get into an OR asap. I think her lung got hit."

Steve nodded and Rhodey announced that they would be in forty minutes in Vienna. He took Nat's lifeless hand and laced their fingers together. She would be okay. She had to be!

Natasha had been in the OR for over two hours now and those two hours were the longest of his life. The whole team was waiting with him for an update on Nat and Steve was out of his mind. Nat was strong, so strong, but she had lost so much blood and she was so tiny...

"Herr -Mister Rogers?" A doctor in scrubs came into the waiting room and looked around. "Which one of you is Miss Rogers' husband?"

"I am!" He jumped up and ran to the doctor. "Is she okay? Can I see her?"

The doctor took a step back because Steve hadn't realized that he was crowding her. "She's in the recovery room. We'll be bringing her soon to a private hospital room. She's stable. We managed to close the hole in her left lung and she should make a full recovery. She's lucky that she's enhanced or she would have bled to death. You can see her soon." The doctor gave him a nod and then left.

Oh thank God! She would be okay. He sighed in relief and turned around to see the others looking relieved as well. Bucky came over to give him a hug. "Like some building could kill Natasha! You should change before you see her." He pointed to the chairs behind them. "I took your duffel bag with me."

He found an empty room to change in and then immediately went to Natasha's room. She was still unconscious but her face wasn't so pale anymore. He dragged a chair to her bed and sat down next to her, never keeping his eyes off of her. He had been very close to losing her and that...just scared him. He loved her so much and living without her was impossible. He would have never adapted or found his place in this new world without her. Only because of his love for her he'd found his way. Natasha was his past, his present and his future. She was his whole world and without her...He would be so lost. But she was still here. She was alive and she would be completely healthy again. He was so thankful for that. Without her nothing would make sense. He carefully took her hand and listened to her heartbeat that echoed through the room. She was okay.

He didn't know how long he'd watched her when her eye lids finally started to flutter and she blinked her eyes open.

"Hey, sweetheart." He murmured softly. "You're in a hospital. Everything's okay."

"What-" She licked her dry lips and he quickly grabbed the glass of water from the nightstand and held the straw against her lips. She almost emptied the whole glass. "Thank you."

"How do you feel?"

"Been better. Rumlow attacked me and managed to get a a hit on me. Then he suddenly ran away and I tried to follow him but the wound slowed me down. I heard the explosion and jumped into a broken freezer." She brushed her thumb over his hand. "Did I scare you much?"

"I was losing my mind, Nat. I can't live without you. I was so fucking terrified that I would lose you." He whispered and cupped her face with his free hand. "You are everything to me."

"I love you." She whispered back. "Kiss me."

He leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to her lips. "I'm so fucking happy that you're okay. We're taking a vacation once you're better. Just you and me at our beach house."

Natasha smiled. "That sounds lovely. We should probably take Liho with us, though."

"Sure. We'll get her cat sunglasses." He joked and Natasha laughed but it soon turned into a cough. "But first you have to fully recover, sweetheart."

"Oh yes, for all the thank-god-Nat-is-still-alive-sex!" Natasha grinned and he snorted. Yeah, she was going to be just fine. "Do you want to join me in here?"

"I shouldn't!" He objected, but she was already moving to the side.

"Please, I sleep better with you right next to me. Just don't touch my left side and we'll be fine." She pouted a little bit and he sighed, taking of his shoes. He carefully got into the bed on her right side. "Thank you."

"Now sleep." He pressed a kiss to her temple. "I love you so much, Natalia."

Her eyes were already closed, but she grabbed his hand. "I love you, too. Only you."

* * *

 _And this is it. I hope you enjoyed this little series:)_


	68. Work hostility (AU)

_AU: Natasha gets a new colleague and she doesn't like Steve Rogers at all._

* * *

Natasha felt good today. She knew her presentation would go well and she'd finally gotten the email from the real estate agent that she would get the apartment near Central Park. She had to invite Pepper and Maria for drinks after work today! She swiped her card and the security let her into Stark Tower where she was working as the head of PR and Marketing. She was the youngest who ever gotten the job and it payed really well. And Pepper was probably the best boss anyone could ask for.

Natasha stopped by her office to drop her bag off and then went with her laptop under her arm into the conference room to set up everything for her presentation. Stark Industries was going into clean energy and it would change the world and Natasha was responsible for the PR campaign.

She swung the doors of the conference room open and almost dropped her laptop. What the fuck was _Steve Rogers_ doing here? He was the competition! He worked for Hammer Industries!

Rogers stood up. "Miss Rom-"

"I'm calling security! How did you even get in-"

"Ah, you already met." Pepper was suddenly behind her. And she didn't seem fazed that Rogers was here. "We finally poached Steve! We've wanted him to work for SI for so long."

 _What now_? She'd had no idea about that! And why would they want Rogers if they had _her_?

"He's your new partner. Technically you're his boss, but I know the two of you are going to make wonderful things happen." Pepper said with a smile.

Rogers came over to him. "Miss Romanoff, it's good to see you. And I really look forward to working with you."

She shook his hand but didn't say anything. He was either here to spy for Hammer or he was trying to get her job. Either way she wasn't going to trust him. Or be nice to him.

Rogers tried to talk to her after her presentation, asking her if he could invite her to lunch so they could go over a few things, but she declined and used her lunch break to sign the contract for her new apartment.

She couldn't believe that Pepper had hired this blond douche. Natasha was excellent at her job, she didn't need this guy to mess up her work! She would just communicate with him through their assistants and wait until he would leave or get fired. Hammer's PR hadn't been very good, so it was only a matter of time until Pepper would let Steve go. She just had to be patient and watch out that he didn't do anything important so he couldn't fuck anything up which would mean more work for her.

She made her assistant bring Rogers enough paper work for at least a week so that he was busy and wouldn't bother her. It didn't help when Darcy came back with a goofy smile on her face after bringing all those files to Rogers. Natasha had already realized that the women had Stark Industries were into him. She'd even caught Maria staring at his ass and that was not like Maria at all. At least at work. So who cared that he was good looking? He was a threat to her job! How many women had lost their jobs to some man?! Too fucking many! And she wouldn't join them. No, whatever Rogers' plans were, she would thwart them!

She managed to avoid talking to Rogers pretty much completely thanks to her assistant Darcy who was passing her notes onto him. As it turned out he was more of a graphic designer and his designs were pretty good -not that she would ever tell him that. He accepted her reasonable critic without complaints and changed what she didn't like. Maybe he had just been looking for a change and wasn't out for her job or spying for Hammer Industries. According to everyone on her team, he was a basically a saint and Darcy seemed to be crushing on him. Well, she was still a kid and who hadn't had embarrassing crushes when they were young and dumb? She wouldn't begrudge her for that.

She hadn't really seen Pepper in the last weeks because of her new apartment and Pepper always being on business trips so she gladly accepted the invite for drinks at the penthouse. She was still a little bit mad that Pepper had hired Steve but she knew that her friend hadn't done it to piss her off. No, Pepper was way too nice for that.

She left her blazer in her office and took the elevator to get to the penthouse. She was more of a brick wall and wooden floor kinda gal but she loved the view from the balcony of the penthouse. She thought that it would only be her and Pepper, maybe Tony and Rhodey if they were in town. And they were here but Steve Rogers was also at the small bar drinking a whiskey or bourbon. _Great_. She gritted her teeth and was about to turn on her heel when Pepper spotted her and came over to her with a big smile on her face.

"Nat." She gave her a warm hug. "It's so good to finally see you again!"

"Yeah, you too." She smiled back because Pepper just had that effect on her. Natasha didn't care about a lot of people but Pepper Potts was very important to her. She could get through one evening with Rogers being in the same room for Pepper. Maybe she wouldn't even have to talk to the guy!

She sat down with Pepper on one of the sofas and they caught up with each other. Talking about work, Natasha's new apartment and other things. Pepper asked her how she was getting along with Rogers (or _Steve_ how Pepper called him) and she answered truthfully that he was good at graphic designing. She didn't tell her that she wanted to strangle the guy on a regular basis. Just his presence alone irritated her immensely.

It was even worse when she found out that Tony and Steve went way back. Apparently they had been friends for years and met while Rogers had been still in the army and SI had been producing military weapons. She hadn't even known that the guy had been in the army. Not that she cared about him or wanted to know anything about him.

She excused herself with a drink in her hand and left to enjoy the view from the balcony. It was a warm summer night and she just watched the city that never slept. Moving to New York had been the best thing that had ever happened to her. She loved this city so much.

"You don't like me _at all_ , do you?"

She turned around and Rogers was standing in the doorway. His jacket was gone and he'd rolled the sleeves of his shirt up. Damn, she had to admit that he was very attractive indeed. But then again, other mothers had beautiful sons as well. He wasn't special.

"What?"

"You always look like you want to murder me." He chuckled and came slowly closer. "Can I join you or do I have to fear that you'll push me off the railing?"

She rolled her eyes and sipped on her martini. _Ass_. He probably thought that he was charming. "Do what you want. It's a free country."

"Ah, there is that tone again. I'm sorry if I've done anything to upset you. Just tell me what it is and I promise I'll stop doing it."

 _You could quit._ "I'm like that with everybody. Don't flatter yourself."

"You're not like with Pepper."

She snorted. "Being anything but nice and sweet to Pepper is probably a crime."

Rogers laughed. "You're probably right. She's a saint. Tony can be lucky to have her in his life." He was now standing next to her. And so close that she could smell him. He smelled nice. "Look, I just want us to get along. Maybe we can even directly discuss projects so Darcy doesn't have run all day up and down the hallway in her high heels. I think you're incredible at your job and I had been looking forward to working with you and I just don't get why you hate me."

"I don't understand why Pepper hired you. I'm great at what I'm doing." He even said so himself five seconds ago.

"I hated it at Hammer and Tony wanted me to work for him for ages. I turned him down every time but I couldn't just work there anymore. Hammer Industries still lives in the past and the climate there is racist and sexist. I wanted to leave for ages but the job paid well and I need the money to take care of my mother." She looked up at him when he said that. "She had cancer and her pension as a nurse is not much. I don't want her to lose her house so I stayed. And when Pepper mentioned that she wanted to change a few things at the company...Well, I asked if they had a job for me. I'd rather just be an illustrator but that doesn't pay enough. And now here at SI I have a job that I don't hate and I can pay my mom's mortgage."

Okay, wow. Now she kind of felt bad. "You're not trying to steal my job?" She blurted out.

"What? No! I don't want your job. I don't even think I'd be any good at it and you really are the best." He smiled a little. "Is that the reason you can't stand me? I'm not after your job, I promise."

"And you're not spying for Justin Hammer?"

"God, no. I hate that dick."

"Maybe I've misjudged you, Rogers." She admitted and he smiled at her. Okay, he had to stop doing that because it irritated her. "I'm willing to speak directly to you so Darcy doesn't have to waltz around in her heels. She can't really walk in them."

Rogers chuckled. "That's true. I asked her why she wasn't just wearing flats and she told me that boss bitches always wear heels. I think she was referring to you."

"Did you just call me a _boss bitch_?" She raised her eyebrow playfully.

"No. Darcy did." He grinned and she laughed. Maybe he wasn't so bad after all. She could dial down the death glares a little bit. It was probably better for the climate at the office.

* * *

She kept her promise and started to talk to Rogers. Darcy's eyes almost fell out of her sockets when she saw them talking in the hallway about a project. She didn't want to be his friend but she also didn't want to kill him anymore so she figured it was progress. Their projects were faster done now that they were directly talking to each other and she had to admit that the outcome was truly better. They really worked well together. Maybe she couldn't do everything on her own after all.

Not wanting to murder Steve Rogers certainly made the business trip she had to take with him easier. They had to represent SI at a conference in Boston and not talking to him would have probably made the whole thing impossible. She still wasn't so sure if she bought into the whole sweet and nice guy thing because in her experience men like that didn't exist. Maybe Rhodey fell into that category and that's why Carol had married him right after high school.

A SI private plane flew them to Boston and they shared a cab to the hotel. Rogers tried to engage her in small talk but she blocked that. She already talked with him about work related stuff, wasn't that enough?!

She wanted to murder someone when the receptionist confirmed their reservation. "One room with two queens."

"No." She said immediately. "We have _two_ rooms. Check again."

"I don't have to. The reservation had been made yesterday and it had been the only room left."

Great, Darcy must have forgotten to book rooms and just called the hotel yesterday. Rogers took the key cards. "We'll take it. Thank you." He turned to her. "I know the situation is not ideal but at least we have two beds. Just don't kill me. Or Darcy, when we get back."

She gritted her teeth and followed him to the elevators. It was just one night. She could do that without killing him. The room was at least nice and she announced that she would shower once they dropped their suitcases onto their beds.

The hot water was helping her relax and she wasn't so mad at Darcy anymore. Yes, she forgot to book rooms in advance but that could happen to everyone. She wrapped a towel around herself and only realized that she'd forgotten to take fresh clothes with her when she was applying her face cream. Shit. She didn't really want Rogers to see her like that. She poked her head through the door and he wasn't there. Thank God! She quickly ran to her bed to grab her suitcase when the door opened and she was so surprised that she forgot to hold her towel with one hand. It fell to the floor and Rogers shrieked.

"Oh God. I'm so sorry!"

Her whole body turnned red and she quickly wrapped the towel around her again. God, she wanted to die right there. She turned around but Rogers was with his back to her. At least he had manners. "I'm decent." She managed to creak out and ran into the bathroom with a change of clothes underneath her arm. Oh God, she was so embarrassed. She couldn't believe that she accidentally flashed her co-worker her ass. Thank God she had been standing with her back to him! She quickly changed into her silk pajamas and left the bathroom.

Steve looked equally embarrassed. "I swear I didn't see anything. I immediately turned around!"

"Then why are you so red?"

"Uh..." His cheeks got even more flushed. Great, he had definitely seen her naked ass. "I might have seen a little bit."

" _Great_. I forgot my clothes and I wasn't...I wasn't trying to sexually harass you or anything." God, what if he filed a complaint with HR?

"I know. You are way too embarrassed to have planned the whole thing."

"I appreciate it if we pretend like this whole thing never happened."

Rogers nodded. "No problem." He took his things and left to take a shower. She sure hoped that he didn't forget his clothes but she wouldn't mind seeing his behind. Or his abs. She shook her head. Woah, she had to stop there right now or she would definitely hear from HR.

She was on her bed going over her notes when Rogers came out of the bathroom, fully clothed. He smiled at her warmly. "Do you wanna order something? I'm starving."

Her stomach growled like on command. "Yeah, sure. Let's see what they have." They both ordered a cheeseburger with fries and it arrived fifteen minutes later. She wanted to eat in silence but it didn't look like Rogers did.

"Do you have any siblings?" He suddenly asked her.

"No."

"Me neither. Do your parents live in New York or-"

"My parents are long gone." Why was she telling him that?!

"I'm sorry. My dad died before I was born so it was always just me and my mom. I was a mess when she had cancer."

"How long is she cancer free?" Why was she asking him that?!

"18 months now. Do you have any other family?"

"No, it's just me. Has been like that for a long time." She wiped her mouth with a napkin after she was done with her dinner. "Are we done now?"

Rogers looked like she slapped him. "I'm sorry. I didn't...I'm sorry if I overstepped any boundaries. That wasn't my intention. I just thought we could get to know each other better. I barely know anything about you."

"So? I prefer it that way."

"Why? Are you some spy who's gonna kill me if I know too much?" He joked but he somehow seemed hurt that she didn't want to tell him anything about her.

"Look, it's nothing personal. I'm just very private. I've been always that way. I'm talking to you and I promise I don't spend my lunch breaks anymore imagining how I would kill you."

He laughed. "What's your favorite way?"

"Strangling you with one of your ties was a favorite. Or pushing you out of the window."

"How traditional. But then you'd have a lot of witnesses if you'd do it at the office. You'd have to get rid of them as well." He quipped and she wondered for a hot second if he was flirting with her. No, he couldn't be. Why would he?

The conference went well and she was amazed at how pretty much every woman was throwing herself at Rogers and how flustered he was because of that. She almost laughed but he looked so uncomfortable that she decided to save him from the flock of women. He had been so confident yesterday during dinner, why was he so shy now? She could admit that he was very good looking so shouldn't he be used to women wanting him?

"Thanks." He whispered when she dragged him into a cab that would bring them to the airport.

"Was there no woman you liked?" She asked with a smirk. "Sharon Carter from the Wall Street Journal seemed to be _very_ into you."

He looked at the top of her head and then into her eyes. "Blondes aren't my type." And there it was again. That confidence. Something fluttered in her stomach. _Shit._

* * *

Natasha came to the shocking realization in the next weeks that she actually liked Steve Rogers. He was just too nice and sweet to dislike him. He always had a kind smile for her and shared his lunch with her when he realized that she only ate _crap_ according to him. She did notice that he started to bring more food than even a giant like him could eat but pretended that she didn't. She didn't know what to think about the fact that he started to cook extra food for her and she actually liked his cooking and didn't bring her _crappy food_ to work anymore.

One day a cookie jar full of delicious homemade cookies was waiting for her on her desk and Rogers only mentioned with a shrug that his mother had made them for her. Which meant that he'd told his mother about her. And what _that_ meant, Natasha didn't know.

She knew that the fact that she was talking to Rogers and not glaring at him anymore was the office topic number one. Darcy seemed almost disappointed that she wasn't spending so much time with Rogers anymore but she would get over it.

She took a deep breath before she pushed the door of his office open. She was about to ask him for a favor and that was something that she did not do. But she was also cheap and didn't want to pay over a hundred bucks just to have someone carry her new dresser up to her apartment and then assemble it. She had grown up with little money and hated to spend money on things that could be done for free. Well, she might buy Rogers a pizza if he helped her. She'd originally wanted to ask Rhodey but he was out of town and she'd rather have no dresser than ask Tony for help. Which only left Rogers and he looked strong enough with all his muscles.

"Hey."

He looked up from his tablet. "Hi." He greeted her with a warm smile.

"So I kinda need your help with something. I don't _need_ your help but I was hoping you'd help me anyway..." She stumbled out. God, why was she so bad at asking for help?

"Sure, what is it?"

"I have this dresser in my basement for ages and I was wondering if you'd help me get it upstairs and with the whole assembling stuff."

"Of course! No problem. Tonight after work?"

"Yes." She turned around to get out of his office. She looked at him before she left the room. "And thank you." He smiled at her warmly and she was kind of looking forward to spend time with him outside of work.

He was waiting outside her office after work and they shared a cab to her place. She wasn't really surprised when he told her that he was living in Brooklyn, she couldn't imagine him living in Manhattan. He followed her down to her storage unit in the basement and refused her help and carried the big box alone to the elevator. Jesus, how strong was the guy? And she was kind of glad that she didn't have to help carry it in her high heels.

"So you don't have a boyfriend who can help you with this?" He asked her after he leaned the package against the elevator wall.

"No."

"Hard to imagine that you don't have a boyfriend with that sparkling personality of yours." He grinned and she watched in amazement how his muscles moved under his shirt when he picked the box up again.

"Did you just make a joke?" She couldn't help but smirk back.

"Happens from time to time." He winked and stepped out of the elevator. She quickly ran past by him to show him where he had to go. She unlocked the door and let him in. He looked around. "Wow, nice place."

"Thank you."

"So where do you want this?"

"My bedroom. This way." She walked down the hallway with Steve following her and she felt a little bit weird to let him into her bedroom but he was only here to help her with the dresser. Together they assembled the dresser in half an hour and pushed it against the wall opposite her bed.

"Thank you so much, Steve."

"Hey, that's the first time you used my first name. I thought you didn't know it." Shit, she hadn't even noticed that.

"Well, you schlepped my dresser up to my apartment so I guess you can call me Natasha."

He smiled so brightly that it almost blinded her. "I will, _Natasha_."

Damnit, she liked that way too much. "Can I buy you pizza as a thank you?"

"What? I am allowed to call you Natasha _and_ I get pizza? What a nice evening."

"Haha, you're very funny." She deadpanned. Who knew that he was a little shit? "You want pizza or not?" He nodded and she left to grab her phone to order. Steve followed her and she motioned for him to sit on the couch while she opened the app from her favorite pizza place. "You like pepperoni?"

"Who doesn't?" He asked back and she decided to just order a family sized pizza. She'd seen how much the guy could eat. Their food arrived shortly after and Steve seemed surprised when she handed him a beer.

"What?"

"I just figured you are a wine girl."

"I have wine if you'd rather have that."

"No, no. Beer is perfect. Thanks."

They talked about work over dinner and she had to admit that it was nice to just sit here with him sharing a pizza. "I'm sorry I've been such a bitch to you at the beginning."

"You thought I was out for your job. I get it." He smiled a little, wiping sauce off the corner of his mouth with his thumb. "And you're surprisingly nice ever since our talk on the balcony."

She rolled her eyes and shoved him a little. "You better appreciate that!"

"I do. Which reminds me and I hope I don't end up getting hit in the head or anything, but my best friend Bucky has a bar and Imagine Dragons is performing this weekend. Do you wanna come?"

She liked their music and she hadn't been to a concert in ages. "Yeah, why not."

Steve smiled. "Great. I'll put your name on the list. You're going to take someone with you or-" He sounded like he didn't want her to bring a plus one and honestly she didn't know who she could bring with her.

"No, just me."

* * *

Natasha would take the fact that it had taken over one hour to get ready to the grave. No one had to know that she changed her outfit three times and made sure that her eyeliner made her eyes look extra green today. She knew why it was important to her that she looked good tonight but she didn't want to admit that out loud.

She took a cab to Brooklyn and was surprised that Steve's friend seemed to have the hottest bar in the borough. She told the bouncer her name and could walk in. Should she look for Steve or was that pathetic? She would just order a drink and sit down at the bar.

"Natasha!" Steve was waving at her from what looked like a private lounge of the bar. This bar was more like a club.

She caught herself smiling at him and came over to him. "Hi."

"Hey. I'm really glad that you came! Do you wanna sit with us?" He stepped aside and pointed at the sofas.

"Yeah, sure. Thanks." She was introduced to Steve's friends and noticed that Barnes, the bar owner, gave his friend an approving nod which made Steve blush a little. _Interesting_.

Steve ordered her a gin tonic and they talked a little before the show started. The concert was great and she somehow ended up pressing herself against Steve's chest during the slower part of the set list. He eventually worked enough courage up to wrap his arms around her middle and they swayed to the music. That was her favorite part of the concert. She liked it even more when she felt his breath on her neck because he brushed his nose against her skin. She liked him and she wanted him. A nice and sweet guy was usually not her type but she decided to make an exception for Steve. She was pretty sure that she wouldn't regret it. There was the whole work issue but she would deal if that once they had to cross that bridge. If Pepper could live with the owner of SI, why couldn't Natasha date her co-worker?

It was way past midnight when Steve walked her out of the bar after a night full of flirting and unnecessary body contact. She didn't have to touch his thigh so much and he didn't have to play with her fingers but they both did it anyway.

"Thank you for inviting me." She told him while they waited for a taxi.

"No problem. I'm really happy that you were here."

"Me, too." She smiled and placed a hand on his bicep. "Do you wanna go out some time? Dinner and a movie?"

"You asking me on a date?" He was beaming at her and one of his big hands landed on her waist to pull her closer to him. "Are you over your hatred towards me?"

"Yeah, I think so. I think a date will help me make a final decision on that subject." She sassed back and Steve chuckled. "A kiss might be helpful as well."

"Yeah?" He asked, his voice deep and husked. She nodded and he cupped her face, pressing their lips together. He kissed her softly but pulled away when she tried to deepen the kiss. "What's the verdict?"

"I think I'll need another demonstration." She said, biting her lips because _damn_ his kiss had been very promising. He laughed and kissed her again, smiling against her lips.


	69. Girl on fire (AU)

_AU: Firefighter Steve meets photographer Natasha who's supposed to take photos for a charity calendar._

* * *

A redheaded woman was just getting out of her car when Steve parked his bike behind the fire station where he was working. Helping people seemed to be his calling so he decided to join the FDNY after he'd left the army. The woman was shouldering a photo bag and went to her trunk where Steve could spot more equipment. _Oh no!_ Was she the photographer for that stupid calendar? That was _today_?! Shit, he so did not want to be in that thing. He groaned but he remembered his manners and walked over to help her carry the lights and screens.

"Do you need help, ma'am?"

The woman turned around and, woah, she was _gorgeous!_ "Oh, that would be very nice. Thank you." She smiled and handed him a few things to carry. "I assume you work here?"

"Yes. I'm Steve Rogers." He'd offer her his hand but his arms were full.

"Natasha Romanoff." She smiled. "Are you one of the models?"

"Huh?"

"For the calendar?"

"Right." They walked through the back entrance into the station. "I'm afraid so. The chief mentioned something like that. I don't really wanna do it if I'm being honest."

Miss Romanoff laughed. "Don't worry. I won't turn it into some porn for horny housewives. I only do tasteful shoots."

"Natasha." Chief Fury came towards to them with a smile on his face. Weird, Fury usually never smiled. "Good to see you, kid. Of course you only visit me at work when it's because of your work."

Did they know each other? Natasha looked at him. "Nick is my foster dad." She explained and then hugged Fury. "Hi, old man." Fury chuckled and patted her back.

"Remember, I don't want this whole thing turning into some Playgirl shooting. We just want good photos to sell many calendars for a new fire truck and to help the homeless shelter."

"Don't worry. I know what I am doing, Nick."

Fury smiled proudly and then looked at Steve. It was kind of weird to see Fury like this. So fatherly and gentle. Not that Fury was an asshole or anything. "Natasha usually works for Vanity Fair or the New Yorker. She's doing this for free."

"Well, I did demand a pot of your chili." She elbowed him with a grin on her face. She really had to be the prettiest girl he'd ever seen. "Can I take a look around? To see where the lighting is the best? Rogers here can show me around." She smiled at him brightly and he saw Fury roll his eyes.

"Um, sure, ma'am." He stuttered out because beautiful women turned him into a shy teenager and her close relationship to Fury kind of freaked him out. "If that's okay, boss."

Fury threw his hands in the air. "Like Natasha doesn't always get what she wants." With that he left and Steve figured that it was okay to show her around. She linked arms with him and asked him all kinds of questions. He did wonder if she was flirting with him. She was so pretty and he liked her spirit. She had a dry sense of humor and made him laugh more than once.

Should he ask her out? Would she say yes? But she was probably already seeing someone.

"Who else is gonna sacrifice themselves for the calendar?" Natasha asked when they reached the common kitchen. Sam and Hill were eating breakfast at the giant dining table. She walked over to them and it looked like she was successful in convincing them to join the photo shoot. It didn't surprise him that Sam was on board, but _Maria_?!

It was almost a miracle but they didn't get called in and Natasha used the whole morning to take hundreds of pictures of the team. She was really good at her job and everyone felt comfortable. No one had to take their clothes off and yet the photos, that she showed them on her laptop, were sexy in a classy way. It was already afternoon when she packed her stuff and he offered again to help her carry it back to her car. He was doing it because his ma had raised him right, but he also wanted to spend a little more time with her. God, he wanted to ask her out so badly, but he feared that she would say no. He still felt like the skinny and scrawny boy he had been most of his puberty when the girls hadn't looked at him twice.

"When's your birthday?"

"Uh, fourth of July." Natasha grinned at that and he held his hands up. "Believe me, I heard all the jokes."

She laughed and shook her head. "Okay, then you'll be July."

"Really?"

"Yeah, why not." She shrugged her shoulders and then she poked him in the bicep. "Do you have a girlfriend, Steve? Boyfriend?"

"No."

"Good." She shoved a card into the pocket of his uniform pants. "This is my number, I hope you'll call." She rose to her tiptoes and kissed the corner of his mouth and his brain stopped working for a second. "It was nice to meet you, Steve."

"Yeah, uh, you too." Holy hell, what just happened?! "I'll call you."

She smiled and got into her car. "You better! See you!" She waved and then drove off. What just happened? A beautiful girl had given him her number and kissed him? That basically never happened to him!

* * *

He wanted to call her and ask her out but work got in the way. They had to put out three fires and get an burglar out of an chimney during his shift and he immediately passed out on his couch when he got home. He slept for over ten hours and only woke up when Bucky started to vacuum the living room.

"Wake up, punk! It's already noon!" Bucky kicked his shin and Steve threw his pillow against his friend's head. He liked living with Buck but sometimes he just wanted to murder him. He'd had such a nice dream about Natasha!

Well, at least he was awake now and could call her. "Did you save any kittens from trees? Did any girls offer to hold your _fire hose_?" Bucky snickered before he turned the vacuum cleaner back on.

Steve rolled his eyes, grabbed an apple from the kitchen and disappeared into his room. He went through his backpack two times but he couldn't find Natasha's card. It had to be here! He'd put it there after he'd gotten it out of his pocket noticing that she'd written her _private_ number on it. Fuck! Where was that card?! He went through his stuff again but the card still didn't show up. How was he supposed to call her now?

He got his laptop and sat down on his bed. He googled Natasha Romanoff but didn't find any contact info. Only her work and she was _really_ talented. She'd been around the globe shooting celebrities, politicians, beautiful landscapes and she had even been at refugee camps to shred a light on the situation in Syria or the Sudan.

Some gossip sides speculated that she'd dated a few Hollywood actors that she'd photographed and he wondered if that was true. And if so, why should she be interested in _him_? She'd kissed him but maybe just for fun. He was just some firefighter from Brooklyn and not some Oscar winner with his own charity. Maybe he should just forget about the whole thing. She probably already regretted giving him her number and jumped every time her phone rang fearing that it was him. No, it was probably better that he lost her number.

He had the next days off and used that time to work on his portfolio because he wanted to get a part time job as an illustrator. He went to the gym and the VA trying his best not to think about Natasha. He liked her and he would have loved to see if that spark between them could have led to something but what could he offer her? _Nothing_.

The next days at work were mostly uneventful with only small fires and a few other small incidents. He'd almost gotten Natasha and her fiery green eyes out of his head when she was suddenly standing in the common kitchen with a carton under her arm. She announced that she was just dropping off a few copies of the calendar, completely ignoring him. Well, he deserved that. He should have at least tried to contact her to tell her that he wasn't interested. Well, he was interested, but _she_ wouldn't be once she got to know him better.

He decided to stay out of her way while she was at the station and went to one of the rooms where they could sleep while they were on call. He just laid down on the bed with a book in his hands when the door opened and closed. He looked up and Natasha was standing in front of the bed with her hands on her hips.

"So do you never call a girl who gives you her number or am I just that special, huh?" She looked furious.

"I lost your card. I thought I put it in my backpack but it was gone."

Her facial expressions softened a little. "Okay. You could have asked Fury for my number."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "He would have never given it to me."

"True." She laughed and sat down at the edge of the bed. "Maybe _you_ should give me _your_ number so I can call you."

"I don't think that's a good idea." He couldn't look her in the eyes. She was so out of his league that it was almost comical.

"Why? I thought you liked me."

"Yeah, but you'll never like me. I mean you go out with Hollywood guys to fancy parties. I can't compete with that."

"I see." Her voice was icy and he looked up at her. She was pissed. "You googled me and now you think you know _everything_ about me. Don't you know you can't believe everything you read online?" She stood up and walked to the door. "You're right that this is not a good idea. I didn't know you were a dick." And with that she left, slamming the door behind her.

He couldn't help but feel like a major asshole. Had he made a mistake?

* * *

Three weeks later while he was on duty they were called to a burning warehouse. It had been empty for years but there could still be people inside so they searched the place. He was upstairs, the smoke making it hard to see, when he heard a cough. And then another one. He followed the noise and found a woman with a little girl in her arms coming towards him. He didn't recognize her at first due to the smoke, but that was Natasha coming towards him. She pushed the girl into his arms who looked at him with fear in her eyes. He told Natasha to follow them and led them out of the building.

He carried the girl to the paramedics who immediately took care of her. He turned around to tell Natasha that she had to get checked as well but she wasn't there. He looked for her and found her sitting on the sidewalk while his unit was putting out the fire. She was hugging herself and he got out of his jacket and wrapped it around her shoulders.

"You have to let the paramedics take a lot at you. You could have fume poisoning." He sat down next to her but leaving enough space between them. "Why were you even in the warehouse?" He took a closer look and she was wearing a tank top, yoga pants and running shoes.

"I was running when these kids were screaming that their friend was still in there so I just ran inside to look for her." She coughed out.

"Okay, you have to get your lungs checked. Come." He stood up and she didn't look like she wanted to follow him. "Please."

She sighed, closing her eyes for a second and then she stood up as well. "Fine."

She was thankfully okay as it turned out and didn't have to go to the hospital. The little girl thanked them for saving her life before the ambulance drove off to bring her to the nearest hospital.

"Thank you for getting us out of there." Natasha murmured while giving him his uniform jacket back. "I don't think I would have found the exit on my own."

He smiled. "I was just doing my job. It was very brave to run into a burning building to save a child."

"Some might say it was pretty dumb."

"No, it was brave and selfless." He assured her.

"Thanks. So I'm not some superficial chick who only dates celebrities?!"

"Uh, look, I never judged you or anything-" He scratched the back of his neck. He really had been an idiot. "I just didn't think I'm your type. I'm not living some fancy and exciting life."

"You're saving people pretty much daily. You saved my life today. I only went out once with that guy and he only talked about himself and left me with the check after he spotted some lingerie model. I'm not into that life and I was actually really mad that you jumped to conclusions about some crap you read online. I just like taking pictures, capturing a moment forever, that's it. I'm actually a pretty boring person."

"I'm sorry, Natasha. I wasn't thinking less of you...I just thought that you would think that I was boring. I mean you're totally out of my league."

Natasha laughed. "Flattery won't get you anywhere today." She blinked her eyes a few times and yawned. She was probably exhausted. "I think I'm heading home. I live just around the corner. Thank you for saving my life."

"I'm sorry again for...well, my behavior. It was just childish."

"It's okay." She nodded and walked away, disappearing between two fire trucks.

"Should have asked for her number, dude!" Sam was suddenly standing next to him. "She's into you!" He decided to ignore the comment.

* * *

Two days later someone knocked on the front door while he was in the kitchen. He heard Bucky getting it, so he stayed where he was. He had been trying to find the courage to ask Fury for Natasha's number but it just felt awkward and unprofessional to ask his boss for his foster daughter's number.

"Hi." He looked up from the sink and turned around. Natasha was standing in his kitchen. "Your roommate let me in."

"Um, hi. I...How do you know where I live?"

"Fury."

"Ah." She put two pizza boxes on the kitchen counter. "I brought dinner. As a thank you for, well, saving my life and as an excuse to stop by."

She followed him into his room where they would be safe from Bucky's curiosity and eavesdropping. "I'm glad you came by. I really am. I was a moron and, again, I'm sorry I blew you off like that."

"You deserve another chance." She smiled. "Now let's eat before the pizza is completely cold."

Natasha stayed almost the whole night. They talked and talked about pretty much everything. They talked for hours and he felt like he'd known her forever. She was funny, smart and very charming. She was really the kind of woman he could fall for. And it looked like she liked him too, because she kissed him when he walked her to his door.

He looked at her, still a little dizzy from the kiss. "Can I buy you dinner?"

"You mean a date?" She smirked and her hands were rubbing up and down his arms.

"Yes."

"Tomorrow seven pm?"

"I'll pick you up." He promised and she pecked his lips. "I'll see you tomorrow, Nat."

The date was amazing and he was really a moron for not realizing how good they were together. She was truly special and he didn't hesitate for a second when she invited him in. And he thanked his lucky stars the next day that Fury wasn't in the locker room when the others were teasing him about the red lines on his back.


	70. The boy is mine (Hi Part VI)

_Natasha has to deal with the fact that the whole world loves and wants her Steve. Takes place in the Hi universe._

* * *

Having Steve back was the greatest thing that had ever happened to Natasha. She would never forget the moment Coulson had told her that SHIELD had found Captain America and that he was _still alive_. She had been _truly_ happy for the first time in almost seventy years when she had seen Steve walking down that ramp of the quinjet.

She kept the fact that she loved Captain America a secret for seventy years and they now kept their relationship a secret as well. She knew that Clint was aware that something was going on between her and Steve but he kept quiet about it. He would let her tell him about Steve when she was ready. Having Steve back in her life and him still loving her was so important and sacred that she didn't want anyone to know about it. Especially not the public. The world was going crazy about Captain America still being alive and they all wanted a piece of him, but they would never get to know this about him. They would never find out that he already had a girlfriend who he met in 1944 at a bar in London. He was hers and she was his.

It still amazed her that most civilians didn't recognize them when they were out in public but it made it so much easier to go out with Steve. To show him everything that changed in the last decades. That they could walk hand in hand down a street and no one looked at them twice. They just looked like any other couple in love.

But it was different when they were on official Avenger business and kept a distance between each other. Men were afraid of her so they didn't approach her, but Steve was always surrounded by women. They basically threw themselves at him, not trying to hide their interest. Steve was polite but she could see how uncomfortable he was. He always apologized profoundly when they were alone, telling her that she was his best and only girl. She knew that she had no reason to be jealous, that Steve loved her and would never cheat but it still bothered her.

The media soon started to call him the most eligible bachelor in the world (something that definitely hurt Stark's ego) and wondered when he would meet someone. Captain America fan clubs were founded where women were gushing online about Steve, picturing him as the perfect boyfriend (which he was). Female celebrities showed interest in him and tried to score dates with him. Gossip sites had polls where reader could choose which actress or singer was the best fit for Captain America. All those things shouldn't bother her, but they did. She knew that they would never click on her name if it would show up in an online poll. No one would want someone like her dating America's golden son. Someone as good and pure as Steve loving her was sometimes even a surprise to her. She had done so much wrong in her life and yet she had gotten a second chance with the sweet boy from the bar.

It gotten worse when Steve officially started to work for SHIELD and they both moved to DC. She was so incredibly happy that she finally lived with the love of her life in a house and that she slept in his arms every night, but she _hated_ the attention he got the Triskelion. She definitely didn't want anyone there to know that they lived together and that she was hoping that Steve would propose soon (they were both from a different time and she wanted _him_ to ask _her_ ) so she treated Steve like any other agent at work. She was professional but kept her distance to him. She didn't want to start any rumors going around why she was nicer to Captain Rogers than to anyone else. People still thought that she was hooking up with Clint and she had only let them believe that to help protect his family.

Here at SHIELD everyone knew who he was and the female agents were all crushing on him. She caught Hill staring at his ass more than once, _May_ smiled at Steve when she ran into him at the Triskelion and especially the junior agents couldn't contain their excitement when they were graced by Captain America's presence.

The audience when Steve was working out or sparing was almost completely female. Look, she got it, okay? Steve looked like a Greek god and had a heart of gold. She could understand why they were all crushing on him, she'd fallen in love with him the moment he'd walked into that bar. Seeing him all sweaty and defeating his sparing partner within minutes did things to her as well and she had dragged Steve into an empty room after training more than once. But she was his girlfriend so it was okay. He was hers and those women lusting after him bothered her! They just wanted Captain America and not Steve. She thought about the photo she had stolen on her first mission in New York that showed Steve before the serum, she highly doubted those women would still want him if he still looked like that. Natasha would always want him, she didn't care how he looked. She looked him for _who_ he was and not for his looks. She loved him so much, more than she ever thought she could love someone.

Steve had a meeting with Fury and Secretary Pierce at the Triskelion that she was not needed for so she got home before him today. She wanted to use his absence to cook him something so they could have a date night at home. They could take a nice bath after dinner or she wasn't opposed to go straight to bed for a little bit of fun. She probably shouldn't love the fact so much that she was the only one who'd ever had the pleasure to share a bed with him. She would be the only one he would ever experience this with. Those women could lust after him all they wanted, they would never actually take him to bed.

She was in the kitchen roasting vegetables when Steve came home. He immediately came to her and wrapped his strong arms around her. Steve gave her a kind of safety that only he could give her and it had nothing to do with the fact that he was so much stronger than anyone else. No, he made her feel secure. She had been so lost without him until he finally had come back to her.

"Hey." She mumbled into his chest and she felt Steve press a kiss on top of her head.

"Hi, sweetheart."

She looked up at him and he lowered his head to give her a sweet kiss, but she could feel that something was bothering him. He was a little bit tense. "What's wrong, darling?"

He sighed and moved to lean against the kitchen counter. "I ran into Agent Carter after the meeting. She asked me out. Just for coffee but her intentions were clear."

She had noticed before that Carter was into Steve. She just didn't think she'd try to make a move. Great, another blonde Barbie who was after her man. "What did you say?"

"I said no, of course. Told her that I'm not looking for a relationship." He shook his head. "She implied that she would also be okay with just sex. Not that's wrong or anything, but not with me!"

God, he was so cute. She pecked his lips quickly and Steve smiled a little. "I can't blame her for wanting a piece of _this_." She pointed at him. "I mean you're incredible in bed." Steve blushed and she grinned. "Let her think that she could have you one day. But Talking to her would probably complicate things."

"Maybe if people knew that I'm with someone than-"

"They'll want to know who that someone is. Just tell them that you keep work and your private life strictly separated. Use your Captain America voice and act disappointed that they would even think that you would date a co-worker."

She got back to roasting the vegetables and Steve moved behind to press kisses on her neck after he pushed her hair out of the way. "But I am dating my second in command. You expect me to lie?" He quipped while his hands landed on her waist.

"Yes. Or your second in command stops letting you into her pants."

He chuckled against her skin. "Well, in that case..."

* * *

There were sometimes stories about women who claimed that they had been with Steve, whether it was in a relationship or just sex. She wondered if those women even really existed or if the tabloids just made them up to sell their magazines. She knew those stories were bullshit and most people didn't buy into it. She didn't tell Steve about it so she had no idea if he knew about this. She really hoped he did't because it would only hurt him. But people still wondered if Captain America was truly single or if he had someone in his life. Some people on the internet even speculated that Natasha was his secret girlfriend (she was actually his _wife_ now!) but most argued in the comments that Captain America would never be with someone like her. No, he would date an all American girl who was sweet and innocent according to them. Some mothers even asked online if there was a way to contact him so he could meet their daughters. Natasha rolled her eyes at them and closed her laptop. She knew that the public would have a problem if they knew that she was Captain America's wife. She also knew that Steve didn't care about her past, but she did care about his reputation. He was the best man she had ever met and she didn't want people to think less of him because of who he'd married.

Steve got invited to award shows and parties of pretty much every single female celebrity. Of course he never went to any of those. She personally was glad that the world didn't know that she and Steve were married. Their friends knew and that was enough. Maybe it was silly, but she was glad that a handful of people knew that she was his wife. Not it wasn't just the dream she'd had for seventy years but actually reality now. He was her husband and he loved her. Only her. She didn't want anyone else to know about their marriage. The world already had so much of Steve, they knew so much about his past that it wasn't fair if they had this of him, too.

All of the Avengers were invited to the Inaugural ball for President Ellis' second term and a part of her wanted to go as Steve's official date. She wanted to wear the most gorgeous dress she could find and show the world that Steve Rogers was hers. She wanted them to wear their wedding bands so everyone would know that they were a couple. But then they would lose the last little piece of privacy and their enemies would know their weaknesses. She wasn't proud of it, but if she had to choose between saving the world or Steve -she would choose her husband in a heartbeat. She had already lost him once, she couldn't go through that again. Once she had found out that her sweet Steve had been actually Captain America and died after he hadn't shown up at the bar...God, that pain had been...There were no words to describe it.

The whole team would go together and she was sure that she would manage to get a few dances with her husband. She would just have to behave herself because Steve in a tuxedo made her want to rip him out of it to have her wicked way with him. Steve seemed to be happy that they would get to be together even though they had to be careful so no one would realize that they were in love.

She found the perfect dress on a shopping trip with Pepper and couldn't wait to see Steve's reaction when he would see her in it. Tony rented the upper floors of a hotel near the White House so the whole team had privacy. She managed to snatch the honeymoon suite from Stark and Pepper with the explanation that she and Steve were actually married unlike the other couple, though she could see a wedding in the near future. She was just doing the last touches on her hair and make up before she stepped out of the bathroom into the bedroom where Steve was fighting with his bow tie.

"You need help, darling?"

"Ugh, yeah!" Steve whined and turned around and she was surprised that his jaw didn't hit the floor. "Nat-wow, you look amazing."

She twirled around herself. "You think?"

Steve came over to her. "Yes. You are always beautiful, but this dress looks stunning on you. And I think it will look great on the hotel room floor later." He winked and brushed his finger over her clavicle.

"Dork." She grinned and helped him with his bow tie. It was kind of adorable that Captain America jumped out of planes without a parachute but had to admit defeat against an innocent box tie.

"Thanks, sweetheart. I kinda wish we could just stay here. The living room of this suite is big enough for ballroom dances." He gave her a soft kiss. "I know why we keep us a secret and I completely agree, but I do wish I could walk in there with you and everyone would know that you're mine. That this gorgeous and brilliant girl married me."

"I know what you mean." She sighed and cupped his face. "But it's better like this. We have to protect this. Nothing is more important than your marriage. We already gave the world so much of us."

He nodded. "I know. I love you."

"I love you, too."

She danced with every member of the team and she had to admit that Tony was a good dancer, but of course nothing could compare to dancing with her husband. They were discreet and only danced twice but it was like only the two of them existed on the dance floor. Steve whispered sweet nothings to her that made her smile and she hoped that her eyes showed him how much she loved him.

She was currently dancing with Bucky and she wondered if he always had been such a great dancer of if Hydra had thought that it was a necessary skill set. They moved effortlessly over the dance floor when Bucky raised his eyebrow. "Oh oh. Looks like the First Daughter is hitting on your husband."

Her head snapped into the direction Bucky was looking and he was right. Liz Ellis was definitely flirting with Steve. It looked like she was trying to get him to dance with her, but he had only danced with Natasha and Pepper tonight. She gritted her teeth, now President Ellis joined them and it looked like he was trying to get Steve to dance with his daughter. Well, what dad wouldn't want his daughter to date Captain America? Steve looked defeated and nodded which delighted Liz to no end. She was beaming brightly when Steve led her onto the dance floor. Natasha almost laughed at the fact that the woman thought that she had a shot with him. But Captain America would go home with Natasha tonight. He would come with her, make love to her and then pull her against his chest so she could sleep in his safe embrace because she was his _wife_. Steve looked slightly annoyed but he was good at covering it while the First Daughter was talking her head off.

"I don't think killing the First Daughter at the Inaugural ball would be good press for the Avengers." Bucky chuckled before he twirled her.

"What?"

"You look like you want to murder her."

"I don't-" Bucky gave her a pointed look. Okay, maybe he was right. The First Daughter was definitely too touchy for her liking. It would probably the story of the year if the First Daughter would start dating Captain America. That would be the most American thing since Apple Pie or baseball. Maybe killing her would be a bit too much, but Natasha would at least love to punch her in the boob or something.

Steve accompanied Liz Ellis back to her table where she tried to get him to sit with her. Natasha was already on her way, when Pepper appeared out of nowhere next to Steve and led him away with an excusing smile. She wondered if the First Daughter realized that she had been _this_ close to getting her ass kicked.

Steve wasn't there when she woke up the next morning and she turned the TV on until he would come back. The most discussed topic was Captain America and the First Daughter dancing and the press was having a field day with it. Photos from yesterday were analyzed by body language "experts" and they were all positive that there was a lot of chemistry between them. Some were already calling them the most spectacular couple since the Kennedys. She wondered what the media would say if they knew that he was actually married to Natasha Romanoff. She doubted that the coverage would be very positive. She was maybe an Avenger, but the public still had a problem with her which she could understand given her bloody past. She heard the door open and turned off the TV. Steve came into the bedroom with a smile on his face and a paper bag in his hands.

"Remember that little cafe we used to go to when we lived in DC?"

"Clarisse's?"

"I went there and got you your chocolate croissants." He looked very proud of himself and she smiled warmly at her dorky husband. Who cared if some woman had hit on him yesterday? The First Daughter would never get to spend the night with Steve and then have him bring her chocolate croissants from her favorite bakery in town. No, he only did that for her.

* * *

The Avengers had to work with the CIA together since they were after the same people and they sent Agents Ross and Carter. She hadn't seen Sharon since the fall of SHIELD and was glad about it. She had known that she was working for the CIA and thought that their paths wouldn't cross again. Yet here was Sharon making heart eyes at Steve. She was staying close to Steve during the debriefing, throwing her hair over her shoulder and subtly trying to show him her cleavage. It was kind of pathetic. Steve had turned her down over three years so, why did she think he'd changed his mind by now?

She touched his arms while they were speaking and during the mission she tried to impress him which almost ended with the head of the Hydra splinter group getting away if Natasha and Bucky didn't manage to prohibit that. Sharon seemed to be embarrassed but it didn't stop her from hitting on Steve who was really uncomfortable by now. She knew that he and Sharon's great aunt had been good friends so that probably alone freaked him out, let alone the fact that he was a married man.

Natasha had enough when she watched Sharon trying to give Steve her hotel key and Steve kept pushing her hand away, telling her that he wasn't interested in her. She stormed over and threw all caution out of the window. Sharon was a former SHIELD agent and now CIA, she knew what Natasha would do to her if she ever told anyone about what Natasha was about to tell her.

She yanked Sharon back, rage cursing through her veins. She wasn't even jealous anymore, she was mad that Carter didn't accept Steve's lack of interest in her but kept pushing him. Sharon looked at her with a mix between anger and fear.

"I would really appreciate it if you stop hitting on my _husband_! Or we're gonna have a problem, Carter!"

Sharon's eyes widened in surprise. "What? He's your...Huh? I had no idea. I wouldn't have...if i had known..." She stuttered out, clearly terrified of her. _Good_.

"And even if he wasn't married, you should have accepted his no!"

"I thought he was just shy! Aunt Peggy always said that he was so flustered when a woman showed interest in him."

Steve raised an eyebrow. "There's a difference between being flustered and _uncomfortable_. I was trying to be polite out of respect for Peggy but you clearly crossed a line!"

"I'm sorry. It won't happen again." She mumbled and quickly left the room.

Steve smiled down at her and she couldn't help but smile back. All that anger was gone now. "Thanks for coming to my rescue."

"You're sometimes too nice for your own good, darling." She kissed the corner of his mouth. "What do you say if we go home and I let you draw on my back?"

He chuckled. "That sounds wonderful. Let's just hope that Liho doesn't run away with the brush in her mouth again."


	71. Liho (AU)

_No woman looks twice at Steve. He's small, skinny and his inhaler is his second best friend after Bucky. But then a black cat gets into his apartment and he meets the cat's owner._

* * *

A loud meowing stopped Steve from working on his sketches for the new project he was currently in charge of. He stopped moving the pencil over the paper and listened. There was nothing except the noise that was Brooklyn. Maybe he had just imagined things. He continued to work on his drawing but then he heard that sound again.

He looked up and saw a black cat on the other side of his window. Did it somehow climb up the fire escape? The cat was meowing and had her paws on his window. He felt sorry for the animal and got up to let it in. Maybe it got lost. The cat moved in a circle before it jumped through the window into Steve's apartment. Maybe he still had some canned tuna? The cat didn't look like it lived on the streets but that didn't mean it wasn't hungry. He filled water into a small bowl and put it in front of the cat who had followed him into his tiny kitchen. Steve was just glad that one of his many allergies wasn't cat hair. The cat looked at the bowl and then at him and it almost seemed disappointed. So it wasn't thirsty then? He looked through his cupboards for canned tuna when he heard a knock on his door. And then another one. He quickly closed the kitchen door behind him so the cat couldn't run away before he walked to his front door. He wondered who it was since he never had surprise visitors. Bucky and Sam always texted him if they wanted to come over.

He opened the door and a _stunning_ redhead was standing in front of him. She smiled at him shyly. "Hi, I'm Natasha. I just moved in and I can't find my cat. She's black. Have you seen her?" She had a slight accent that he couldn't place. Maybe something East European? He was surprised that she was still smiling at him because most women looked at him funny. He wasn't tall or muscular build like his friends. He was skinny and only one or two inches taller than the woman standing in front of him. And she was short, even for a woman.

"I think I have your cat."

Her eyes lit up. "Really? I must have knocked on dozens of doors already. Not a lot of nice people live here."

"Yeah. Your cat was sitting in front of my window and I just let her in. She's in my kitchen." He stepped aside. "Do you want to come in?"

She nodded. "Yes, thank you. I'm sorry if Liho annoyed you. She sometimes just wanders off." She smiled. "I'm glad she got into your apartment and not one of those douchebags on the third floor."

No woman had ever been in his apartment before. And he lived here for three years now. Bucky had tried to set him up on blind dates but those always ended with the girl saying that he was very sweet but she just couldn't see anything happening between them.

"I'm Steve. Steve Rogers."

She offered him her hand. "I'm Natasha Romanoff. It's very nice to meet you."

"Uh, yeah." He stuttered out because he was almost shocked that she didn't look at him with pity. No, she looked at him like he was just some normal guy. "Your cat's in there." He pointed at the kitchen door and Natasha opened it. Her cat was currently going trying to get a drawer open.

"Liho, you little fury bastard!" Natasha chided and the cat kind of looked embarrassed. Could cats do that?! "I can't believe you harassed this nice man to get into his apartment!" She picked the cat up who tried to get out of her embrace but she was unsuccessful. "I'm sorry again. Thank you for letting her in though and not shooing her away. Who knows where she would have landed instead."

"No problem, ma'am."

"Ma'am?" She laughed a little. "Did my cat find the only American man with manners? I thought you were all just frat boys."

"So you're not from here?"

She shook her head. "No, I'm from Russia. I lived there until I was a teenager and then we moved to London. I studied in California and now I moved to New York. I don't know why I just told you half my life story." She chuckled. "I should go. I still have a million boxes to unpack. I'm 5C, by the way."

"I'm 4A."

"I know." She grinned. "We're currently in your apartment."

"Right. Uh, it was nice to meet you."

"You, too, Steve Rogers." She took her cat's paw to make the cat wave at him. "Bye, Steve." She smiled at him before she left his apartment. He could hear her talking to her cat in what he assumed was Russian and by the tone of her voice she was angry at the cat. She was probably mad that her cat had gotten into the apartment of a man like _him_. Or maybe she was just angry because her cat had ran away, a nicer voice in his head suggested.

* * *

He kind of waited for the cat to show up at his window in the next days but she never did. Maybe Natasha had now an eye on her cat and he didn't run into her when he was in the lobby or the elevator. It was almost like he'd dreamed the whole thing.

Work kept him busy in the next couple of days and he almost didn't hear the knock on his door. The office had been very hectic today and he immediately laid down on his couch when he'd gotten home. He got up, still a little groggy from his nap, and opened the door. Natasha was smiling at him and held a bottle of champagne up. He was no expert but it looked like the expensive kind of champagne.

"I got this at work today. Do you wanna share it with me?"

"Why?"

Her smile fell a little. "Because you're the only one I know here and you seemed nice? I thought we could become friends. I'm sorry. I should go."

She looked really embarrassed and was turning around to walk away. "No, wait. I'm sorry. It's just no neighbor ever wants to hang out." He barely knew the names of the other neighbors and he was more than surprised that a woman like Natasha wanted to spend time with him.

"So I can come in?" She held the bottle up. "It's really good champagne."

He reminded himself not to drink too much because he was a lightweight due to his height and weight. "I don't have champagner flutes, though."

"Who cares." She let herself in and handed him the bottle. "Mugs are just fine." He saw out of the corner of his eye that she was sitting down on his couch while he got into his kitchen to get two normal glasses. He came back to the living room and put the glasses down on the coffee table. Natasha took the bottle out of his hands and popped it open. She filled their glasses and raised hers. "To new friends."

He nodded. "To new friends." He took a sip and damn, that stuff tested good! "Where do you work that you get stuff like this?"

"Stark Industries." She placed her glass on the coffee table. "I work for Stark's charity. You don't believe what kind of gift baskets we get. It's insane. I mean they could just donate that money as well, but no they sent us baskets worth thousands of dollars along with their checks." She took a look around his living room and he thanked his mother for raising him to keep his place clean. "I like your place. It looks very homey and warm."

"Thank you."

"And what do you do?"

"I work as an illustrator. I mostly do sketches for books or PR campaigns."

"So you're an artist. That's very impressive! I bet you're very good at your work." She took his right hand. "These are the fingers of an artist."

"Uh, thanks?"

She smiled and let go of his hand. "Sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable." She took a sip from her champagne. "I should probably warn you that Liho will eventually try to get into your apartment again."

"Okay?"

"She's very sneaky and she'll find a way outside and she knows that you once let her in so she'll try again. She's clean and nice, so you don't have to worry about that."

"It's okay. I don't mind. Would have been a problem if she was a dog. I'm allergic, but cats are surprisingly okay."

"I'm allergic to strawberries. One bite and I'll get as red as my hair. Too bad though, I love strawberries."

Maybe it was weird and not very nice, but he liked the fact that she had allergies, too. Well, _one_ allergy. Bucky wasn't allergic to anything. "And do you like it so far in New York?"

"Yes. And I love that I'll actually get to experience all four seasons here. I love fall and winter. And I'm glad that I now have a new friend who lives in my building." She smiled and he knew he was blushing. She refilled his empty glass and he should have stopped her but he didn't. "So do you have a girlfriend? Or boyfriend?"

"No." He answered sharply because he hated the topic.

"No one special?"

"No." He almost wanted to laugh. Natasha seemed actually surprised that he wasn't seenng anyone. "Do you have a boyfriend. Or girlfriend?"

"No, no." She laughed. "I haven't dated in months."

She sounded like months was a long time for her. He hadn't dated in years. Not since Peggy had moved back to England and no woman had been interested in him since then. "I'm sure you'll find someone in no time."

She tilted her head and seemed somehow amused. "Maybe I already have."

He woke up the next morning on his couch with a headache and found a glass of water on the coffee table. A note was popped against the glass. _Drink me!_ was written in neat handwriting next to a phone number. Only Natasha could have left that there. God, what happened last night? Judging by his hangover he had been drunk.

God, he just hoped that he hadn't embarrassed himself. Natasha was nice and she actually wanted to be his friend. He knew that he would never have any chance with her but she seemed so lively and charismatic that he wanted at least to be her friend. He couldn't really remember much from last night, but he somehow thought that they had been dancing? He remembered Natasha taking his hands and teaching him a few dance moves after he'd blurted out that he couldn't dance. Did that really happen or was that just wishful thinking? And she left that note and glass of water for him. Did that mean that he'd fallen asleep while she had still been there? God, how embarrassing!

He saved her number in his contacts but he didn't call or text her. He didn't really know what to say to her.

* * *

"Dude, there's a cat scratching at your window!" Bucky said while they were watching the game. They were both Dodgers' fans despite the team moving away from New York ages ago.

He turned to look at the window where Liho was standing on her hind paws with her front paws placed on the window. He got up to let her in. "Hey, there. Did you run away again?" Liho rubbed her head against his shin before she stalked further into the apartment. She stared at Bucky before she padded into the kitchen. He filled a bowl with water and then put a little bit of canned tuna on a saucer for her.

"Is that your cat?" Bucky asked when he came into the kitchen.

Steve sometimes hated it that he had to look up to his best friend. He wished he was as tall and muscular as his best friend. Maybe then the army would have accepted him and he could have served with Bucky.

"No, she belongs to Natasha."

Bucky smirked. "Natasha, huh? And who is this Natasha?"

"My neighbor." He thought about what Natasha had said to him. "And friend."

"Look at you making female friends! Is she pretty?"

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"I'll take that as a yes. Where does she live? Shouldn't you go over to her and tell her that her cat is at your place?"

"I'll try calling her." He hadn't called her before and he felt a little bit weird about it but at least he had an actual reason now.

"Oh, you have her number!"

"Don't be an ass!" Steve hissed and pressed his phone against his ear. Natasha didn't pick up and he hang up before he got her voice mail. Liho trotted past by them and rolled herself into a ball on his couch. He was pretty sure that the cat was planning on sleeping there. He quickly sent Natasha a text that Liho was with him and then he locked his screen. Bucky looked offended that the cat had stolen his spot on the couch and sat down on the arm chair glowering at the animal.

Bucky was already gone when Natasha texted Steve back. Liho was still sleeping, occasionally changing sleeping positions. She wrote that she'd had to deal with a work issue and was on her way home, promising to pick her cat up.

Half an hour later, someone knocked on his door. He let Natasha in who looked exhausted in her crinkled blouse and pencil skirt. She was taller now than him in her pumps.

"I'm so sorry that's she been here so long. We had a crisis in the office and I couldn't leave. I'm sorry."

"It's okay. Don't worry." He assured her. Liho had been mostly sleeping and hadn't bothered him. "Do you want something to drink? I have juice. Or beer."

She smiled. "That's very sweet, but I just want a shower. Another time?" She picked Liho up from his couch and the cat snuggled against her chest. "I have your number now, so I'll text you. Okay?"

He nodded and walked her to the door. "Have a nice evening."

"Likewise, Steve." She leaned forward and pressed her lips on his cheeks. "And thanks for taking care of Liho."

"Uh, yeah." He managed to get out, touching the spot on his cheek where she'd kissed him. She had just done that because he'd let her cat sleep on his couch. It didn't mean anything.

* * *

Everyone at work had gotten a thank you basket stuffed with fruits, chocolate and wine and he figured that he could share it with Natasha. She had shared that expensive champagne with him and he thought that he should return the favor. He hoped that Natasha was home, but she was probably somewhere enjoying her life.

He knocked on the door and no one opened. Of course she wasn't home on a Friday night. He was already back at the elevators when he heard her voice. "Steve, wait! I was in the bathroom." He turned around and Natasha was just in a towel standing in the hallway. "Come back!"

Her hair and skin were still wet and the towel barely covered her body. She had really nice legs. Woah, what the hell was wrong with him?! He started to have problems to properly breathe and he prayed that he wasn't going to have an asthma attack.

How pathetic would it be if he got one because of a half naked woman?

"Uh, I got this at work and thought we could dig in?" He blurted out, trying to slow down his breathing. It was a miracle that it actually worked because he could now smell Natasha and she smelled heavenly.

"Oh, yes!" She beamed and got back into her apartment. "Get in before Liho escapes!"

He practically jumped inside and she closed the door behind him. Liho was on a cat tree, looking at the basket in his arms.

"Just give me a minute to get into actual clothes." She laughed. "Glasses and plates are over there!" She pointed at the open kitchen and left the big living room. He looked for two glasses and plates and put them on her coffee table after he'd found them. Liho jumped down from her cat tree to inspect the fruit basket. She didn't seem happy and trotted into the kitchen, probably heading straight to her feeding dish.

Natasha was still gone and he looked around a little bit. She had _a lot_ of books. Most were in English or Russian, but there were also some in French and Spanish. Wow, did she speak four languages? He could only speak and read _un_ _petit peu_ of French. He went back to the couch and sat down.

Natasha came into the room in a man's t-shirt and leggings. Did she have a boyfriend now? He wasn't surprised, but he had to admit that he was a little bit sad. He knew that he had no chance with her but she was so nice and didn't look at him with pity. He didn't feel like a _shrimp_ when he was with her. He hoped that the guy knew how special she was.

"Do you wanna watch a movie while we have our feast?" She asked while she plopped down on the couch.

"Sure." He nodded with a smile and Natasha turned the TV on. They agreed to watch the latest DC movie since they both hadn't seen it yet. The red wine made her lips look even more appealing and he remembered how her plump lips had felt on his cheek. His mother would pull his ears for thinking like that about a friend. Natasha just wanted his friendship and here he was turning into one of those guys he despised so much.

The movie was soon forgotten and they talked for hours about pretty much everything they could think of. Natasha was not only very beautiful, but she was also damn funny and very kind.

Unfortunately he laughed so hard at one of her stories that he needed his inhaler. He was incredibly embarrassed that he had a small asthma attack, but Natasha was just so nice and seemed very worried about him.

"Are you better now? Do you need anything?"

"A glass of water maybe?"

"Just one sec!" She jumped off the couch and came back moments later with a glass of water. "Here."

"Thank you." He mumbled out and slowly emptied the glass. God, he was mortified! He should leave as soon as it was possible.

Natasha looked guilty. "I feel like I should apologize for almost killing you."

"What, no. It's just something that happens." He put the glass on the coffee table. "I'm not as healthy as most people. I have a ton of allergies and asthma. Well, and I've never gotten that growth spurt boys usually have in high school."

Natasha smiled, but it was a warm smile and not the way most people smiled at him. "I still feel like I have to make it up to you. How about dinner and a movie? Do you like Italian? We can go to a restaurant or I can cook if you tell me what you're allergic to." Her eyes lit up. "Oh, we could go dancing! There's this jazz club a block from here. Do you wanna go there with me?"

"I can't."

"Why not? I can show you the steps before we go." She smiled. "That's no problem."

"That's not it. I can't have dinner with you or go dancing with you." Her smile vanished and she somehow looked guarded. "I like you too much for that. I know that you just want to be friends and I...I think I like you more than that. I'm sorry."

"Okay." She seemed mad. Why? She probably had more friends by now. "What exactly makes you think that I didn't just ask you on a date?"

"Huh?" He was surprised that his jaw didn't hit the floor. "What? I mean...Look at me and then at you. We're basically from two different worlds."

"All I see is a nice and attractive man who I'd like to get to know better." She thought that he was _attractive_?! "And I thought he was interested in me too, so I asked him out."

"You really wanna go out with _me_? On a _date_?"

"Yes. Is that so hard to believe?"

"Yes! I mean...you're _you_ and I-"

"You're a sweet and friendly guy." She smiled. "And you have pretty blue eyes and your lips look very kissable."

He knew that his whole face was red. He rarely got any compliments. "Really?"

She nodded and came loser. His breath got caught in his throat when she cupped his face with her hands. "Can I kiss you?"

He licked his lips. "Yes." He breathed out and Natasha was already pressing her lips softly against his. He hadn't kissed anyone in so long and he forgot how great it was. Natasha tasted like wine and chocolate and it was perfect.

Her cheeks were flushed when she pulled away and she was softly smiling. "Very kissable, indeed." She whispered and kissed him again.


	72. Sleeping Beauty (AU)

_AU Natasha volunteers at the hospital and reads to Captain Rogers who is a coma patient._

* * *

Natasha left the hospital room of Hank and Nick with a smile on her face. Both men were old enough to be her father and they treated her like a daughter. She liked them a lot. People like them were the reason why she was volunteering at the SHIELD hospital in Brooklyn. Not every patient had family or friends that could visit regularly and she liked spending time with those patients.

She came twice a week to the hospital to see if anyone wanted to play a game or just talk. Life was good to her and she wanted to give something back and she hadn't hesitated when her friend Laura had told her about the program at her hospital. Natasha's job as a dance instructor was fun and paid good money, but she wanted to do more than that. And she felt like she was doing it here. The patients were so nice and grateful that she spent time with them and she was just happy that she could help make their day a little bit better.

She checked again if she had her e-reader in her bag before she entered the ICU. She cleaned her hands and sanitized the e-reader before she stepped into the room of Captain Rogers. He had been hurt while he had been deployed in Iraq and he was all alone. She only knew that he had two friends who were still in Iraq because a Sam Wilson had written her a letter thanking her for spending time with his friend when he couldn't be there for him. She didn't even know how this Wilson knew about her.

"Hi, Steve." She greeted him before she dragged a chair to his bed. She hoped that he was okay with her using his first name. She'd called him Captain Rogers in the beginning but stopped eventually. A nurse must have shaved him because his beard was gone. She had liked him with one. She had to admit that Steve Rogers was a very attractive man, but it was probably unethical to think like that about a coma patient. He had been in a coma for over four months and she had been reading to him for two. She hoped that he would wake up soon. The doctors weren't very optimistic about it but Natasha could tell that Steve was a fighter from what Wilson had written her. She knew that he would wake up one day, she just did.

She sat down but stood up again when she noticed that the blinds were closed. She opened them again so Steve would have a bit of sunlight in his room.

"I do wonder what you're dreaming about. Maybe about Harry Potter? We're almost done with the fourth book. Man, I hope you like Harry Potter and I'm not annoying you. Remember about that old man who always came alone to my dance classes? Stan showed up with a lady last week! He had been learning how to dance for her! Isn't that sweet? Are you a dancer? Or more of a jock? It's insane how muscular you still are despite being in bed all day."

God, she'd started to ramble again. She'd developed the habit to just talk to Steve. She told him about her work and other things that happend to her since the last time she had visited him. She liked to think that he liked to hear about those things. She didn't actually know him but in her mind Steve Rogers was a kind and sweet man.

"Okay, I think that was enough about me for today. Let's dig into Harry Potter, shall we?"

She read him three chapters before it was time for her to go. She had still to pay Peggy Carter a visit before she had to go to work. "I see you on Thursday, Steve." She gave his hand a squeeze like every time she did when she visited him and then left his room. She hoped that he would wake up soon. He was still so young, he still had his whole life ahead of him.

* * *

"I forgot my e-reader. I'm sorry, Steve." She apologized after she sat down next to his bed. "My morning had been pretty hectic today. The apartment above me had a water-pipe burst and they had to check if my pipes were damaged as well. Now I have a hole in my bathroom wall." She sighed and looked at him. Of course he couldn't answer her and she felt kind of silly. A hole in a wall was nothing compared to what he was going through. She fought the urge to caress his cheek. That would be creepy. He had such a beautiful face and she was seriously jealous about his eye lashes. They were so long that they touched his cheeks. She wanted to know what color his eyes were but she couldn't just check. No, that would also be creepy.

"I hope it's okay if I just talk with you today. I'm sorry we're not reading Potter today. Remember Stan? Well, he actually proposed to his lady friend and they asked me to teach them a wedding dance. Do you want to get married? I don't know if I ever want to get married...One day maybe. That reminds me that my ex texted me. We ended things months ago and now he suddenly wants to meet for coffee? You know, he cheated on me. With his secretary, what a fucking cliche. I'm sure that you're a better man than him. I bet you'd make a great boyfriend." She shook her head. Jesus, what was she talking about? She quickly changed the subject and told him about her niece's school project.

She squeezed his hand as a goodbye and ran into Dr. Banner, Steve's neurologist, on her way out. "Dr. Banner! Hi."

"Hello, Natasha." He gave her a kind smile. "Have you been talking to Steve again?"

"Yes. Any progress?"

Banner sighed. "No. But it's good that you're talking and reading to him. We know that coma patients react to it. Some even say later that they heard everything that was said to them while they were in a coma."

 _Oh._ "Well, then I better not confess to any crimes." She laughed nervously. God, what if he remembered all the stupid crap she had told him? She probably wouldn't even see him once he woke up, so she shouldn't worry about that.

Bruce chuckled. "Yeah, something like that. I have to go back to work. Have a nice day."

She nodded. "You, too."

She left the ICU and decided to visit Laura at the maternity ward. Clint, Natasha's best friend and Laura's husband, was also in the nurses lounge when she looked there for Laura.

"Hey." Clint nodded to her and Laura smiled warmly. "How's Sleeping Beauty?"

"Don't call him that." She snapped at him and sat down at the table.

Clint held his hands up before he continued eating his muffin. "No signs that he'll wake up soon?" Laura asked in a gentle tone.

"No." Natasha shook her head. "It's just so unfair. He's so young and served his country and then he ends up in a coma?"

"He's not the only soldier like that. I have a lot of moms here whose partner is overseas or was killed in action."

"War sucks."

Laura nodded. "Yeah, it does." She offered her one of the muffins before Clint ate them all. "Do you want to come over for dinner tonight? Lila will be thrilled and Cooper will be as well, even though he's too old and cool to show that anymore."

"Yeah, that sounds great." She couldn't help but think about Steve. He would be all alone when he woke up. She knew from Wilson that he had no family and it would take months until his two friends would come home. She hoped that Steve would be awake by then.

* * *

Natasha was still grinning about the story Peggy Carter had told her when she had visited her. The ninety year old woman had a wicked sense of humor and could tell the most amazing stories. She really liked Peggy, Natasha could only hope to be like that when she was her age.

The smile vanished when she walked into Steve's room. It was _empty_. The bed was made, but there was no one in it. Was he- did he _die_? She suddenly felt like someone punched her in the gut. She had to sit down. Was he really dead? She bit on her lip, trying to collect herself. She was not going to cry right now.

"Natasha?" She turned around and Dr. Banner was standing behind her. "What are you- Did no one tell you that Rogers has been transferred to the regular hospital ward?"

"Huh? No." He wasn't dead? Oh thank God! She sighed in relief.

"Rogers is awake. He woke up yesterday morning. No brain damage, nothing. It's almost a miracle."

"What?" She stared at Banner. "He's awake?"

Banner smiled. "Yeah. He's been asking about a woman who he thinks has been talking to him. I'm pretty sure he means you." She was blinking at Banner in confusion while he told her which room Steve was in.

She walked to Steve's new room on autopilot. He was _awake_ and he wanted to see her. She couldn't believe that he was actually awake now after all these months she'd read to him waiting for him to open his eyes. She was happy for him, but she felt really weird to actually meet him. Did he think that it was weird that a stranger had visited him twice a week? Did he remember what she had told him?

A few nurses were talking and giggling when she walked past them.

"He's so handsome!"

"Have you seen his arms and hands? So big and strong!"

"Would it be super inappropriate to ask him out?"

Who were they talking about? She nodded at them in greeting and the nurses stopped talking. One or two turning pink. _Weird._ She stopped in front of Steve's room and took a deep breath. Should she have gotten a gift for him? No, there was no reason for that. She would just say hello and wish him a quick recovery and then leave.

She knocked on the door. "Come in!" She swallowed her nervousness down and opened the door. Steve Rogers was alone in his room and looking at her with a smile on his face. "Hello."

Her heart started racing because she finally knew that his voice sounded like. And she liked his voice. It was deep and warm. "Hi. I'm Natasha. I think you were asking for me?"

His eyebrows were furrowed in confusion before he nodded. His eyes were a light blue. He had very pretty eyes. "Are you the one who read to me?" His whole face lit up. God, he was _beautiful_.

"Um, yes. Hi." She walked into the room. "I hope you like Harry Potter?"

He laughed. What a beautiful sound! "Yeah, I mean I've only seen the movies. Never thought I would have to be in a coma to finally read them. Or have them read to me."

"Uh-"

"Too soon for coma jokes?"

"Maybe, but you're the one who has been in one, so I guess you get to decide when it's okay to make them." She walked over the bed and offered him his hand. "I'm Natasha Romanoff. It's really nice to meet you. _Really_ meet you."

He nodded and took her hand. She didn't know why but she was so happy that he _finally_ squeezed her hand back. "Steve Rogers, ma'am. Thank you so much for reading to me. For spending time with me. I heard you. I don't know how to explain it but...it felt good to know that someone was there."

"You're welcome?" She didn't really know what to say. He seemed so grateful and she had just read to him. "I love any excuse to read Harry Potter." She joked and Steve smiled. "How are you feeling?"

"Surprisingly good. I have to build up my muscles again but my brain is unharmed. My wounds are long healed and I should be able to leave the hospital soon."

She sat down on the chair next to his bed. "Do you remember what happend to you?"

He nodded grimly. "Yeah. We were patrolling a village when a group of terrorists ambushed us. I tried to get my unit out but there were so many. I remember getting shot in the leg and then something was burning into my temple and then I woke up here. I now know that a bullet hit my head. I'm lucky I'm still alive."

"I'm sorry if I upset you. I didn't mean to."

He shook his head. "No, you didn't. You spent so much time with me, you deserved to know what happened. I think my friend Sam has contacted you? I talked to him and my other best friend Bucky earlier today."

"Yeah." She nodded. "He wrote me a letter thanking me for talking to you since he and his friend couldn't be there for you. He told me that you don't have anyone here in New York."

"I only ever had Bucky and Sam after my ma died."

She suddenly had an idea. "Do you want my number? I mean you probably need help to get settle back in into civilian life, right? My best friend is a realtor, I'm sure he can help you find a place. And I can help you with other things?"

"You would really do that? You don't have to. You've already done so much for me, Miss Romanoff."

"Please call me _Natasha_. And I don't mind. I really don't."

Steve smiled. "Thank you so much."

* * *

She helped Steve fill out the paperwork for his army pension and Clint found a nice apartment in the area Steve had grown up in. She knew that he was going to the VA and seeing a therapist for his PTSD. She helped him pick out furniture for his new place and drove him to the storage unit where the rest of his stuff was. She spent a lot of time with him in the next weeks and she liked to think that they were friends.

It was a warm Summer day and she was having her lunch in front of the dancing school. She kept looking at her phone because Steve had an interview for an illustrator position today and she was dying to know how it had gone. He was so talented, he had to get the job!

She was just biting into her sandwich when she heard Steve calling her name. "Nat, hey!"

She put her sandwich back into the lunch box and waved at him. "Hi. What a nice surprise! How did it go?"

"I got the job!"

She jumped up from the bench to hug him. "That's amazing, Steve! I'm so happy for you."

"Thank you." He smiled down at her. "What do you say to celebration drinks tonight?"

"Sounds great!" She sat down back on the bench. "You wanna share my lunch with me? If you have time?"

"For you, always." He smiled warmly and sat down next to her. "I would have never applied to that job if it weren't for you. So thank you, Nat."

She poked his thigh with her finger. "You did that all by yourself, mister!"

Steve picked her up with his bike at her place and drove them to a bar in Hell's Kitchen because he knew the owner. He helped her off his bike and then introduced her to Luke before they sat down at a little table near the windows with their drinks.

She raised her Martini glass. "To your new job!"

"Thank you." He smiled and clinked his glass with hers. "I couldn't have done it without you, Nat." She opened her mouth but he held his hand up. "I mean it. You helped me so much. You were there for me when I needed someone to help me find my place back in this world. I can never thank you enough for your friendship, Natasha. You have no idea how important you are to me." He reached into his leather jacket and pulled a flat and square box out of it. "This is for you."

"Steve-"

He handed her the box. "I hope you like it." He said with a dopey grin. The grin she liked so much and that made her feel things she shouldn't feel.

She opened the box and smiled at him. "Thank you, Steve. It's beautiful." He had given her a golden identity bracelet with her name engraved on it. "I love it, but you shouldn't have."

He waved her off. "Yes, I should. You've done so much for me, this is the least I could do." He took her hand and she hoped she was hiding her shiver. "You need my help to get it on?"

"Yes, please." He took the bracelet, wrapping it around her wrist. "Thanks." She moved her arm around and the bracelet was shining in the light. "It's perfect."

"I'm just glad that you like it." He took a sip from his Bourbon and his eyes were smiling at her. She wanted to reach over the table to hold his hand, but she stopped herself. She was currently his only friend and she didn't want to ruin their friendship with her crush on him. Who was she kidding? It was _more_ than a crush.

Luke joined them when he could leave the bar for a few moments. "It's nice that you finally came by, Rogers!" Apparently Steve had met him at the gym and they both hit it off. Both men were very muscular, Luke looked even a bit bigger than Steve. And Steve was already pretty beefy.

"Well, you've been bugging me forever to pay your place a visit." Steve laughed and clapped Luke on the shoulder.

Steve's friend looked at her. "And he failed to mention what a beautiful girlfriend he has." Luke smiled at her. "You two seem very happy together."

"Oh, we're not a couple." Natasha said quickly before Steve could correct him. "We're just friends."

Luke seemed skeptical. "Just friends?" He looked at Steve. "Do you give all your friends pretty bracelets? Do I get one as well?"

Steve laughed uncomfortably and Natasha couldn't help but feel a little embarrassed. She hadn't thought that Steve would be _that_ uncomfortable with the idea of them being more than friends. "Very funny, Luke."

Luke excused himself when the bar got fuller again and Natasha just wanted to go home. Steve's mood seemed to have changed since Luke had called her Steve's girlfriend. She had secretly hoped that he also liked her more than just a friend, but why would he? He'd just gotten his life back after a coma and was probably not ready for something romantic.

They left the bar pretty soon after their conversation with Luke and Steve drove her home. She got off his bike and he walked her the few steps to the entrance of her apartment building.

"Thank you again for the bracelet."

He was finally smiling at her again. "You're welcome." He took her hand to look at the bracelet. "It's looks great on you."

"Thanks." She smiled back. She didn't know what came over her but she leaned forward and pressed a kiss on Steve's cheek. "Goodnight." She hurried up the stairs without looking back at him.

"Goodnight." She heard Steve mumble in the background before she walked through the door.

* * *

Steve was busy with his new job and Natasha had added another dancing class to her work schedule so they didn't see each other much in the next weeks. She had been a bit grumpy according to Peggy when she visited her and offered to set her up with her grandson. She turned the offer down but maybe she should go out again. She knew that nothing would happen between her and Steve and maybe it was time to start trying to meet guys. She was ready for a new relationship. She missed being in one. Maybe she should download one of those dating apps.

She was surprised when Steve invited her to a party. They had only texted from time to time in the last two weeks, but apparently his friends were back and throwing a party to celebrate their return. She texted Steve that she would come before she opened the dating app to see with whom she matched. She didn't like any of her matches and threw the phone next to her on the couch. Maybe she would meet a nice guy at that party.

She came a little bit earlier to the party because Steve wanted her to meet his two friends. She decided to wear a short black dress that showed off her figure in case there were any cute guys. Steve was sitting at the bar with two men when she walked into Luke's place. He looked damn good in his blue button down and tight jeans. Damn, why did he have to be so attractive a _nd_ funny and sweet?!

"Nat, hi!" Steve looked over to her and waved. She waved back, smiling at him and his friends. Okay, his friends were now looking at her and pretty attractive. Maybe one of them was looking for a romance? God, did she really just think that? She couldn't start seeing one of his friends.

Steve stood up and introduced her to the two men. "Natasha, these are Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes, my best friends. Sam, Bucky, this is Natasha." She didn't miss how he didn't call her his friend. Did that mean anything? Was their friendship already over? No, she didn't think that he wanted her to meet his oldest friends in that case.

"Hi, it's nice to meet you." She shook their hands and sat down at the bar. Luke greeted her and made her a Martini.

"It's so nice to finally meet you. Stevie won't shut up about you." Bucky told her with a sly grin. Oho, this guy was definitely a flirt. She looked over to Steve who was sporting a pretty cute blush on his face. She couldn't help but be smitten by it.

Sam rolled his eyes at his friend. "Ignore him. That's what I do. I just wanna thank you for looking after Steve while we couldn't. It was killing me to know that he was alone there in a hospital bed, and I was so relieved when I heard that a volunteer was spending a little bit of time with him. Thank you! Steve's the best man I know and he wouldn't have deserved to be all alone during that difficult time."

She swallowed the lump in her throat down. "It was no problem. It was actually kinda nice to talk to someone without getting interrupted." She joked, hoping she was hiding her embarrassment. "Steve's a good listener."

Bucky laughed and pushed a shot glass over to her. "Yeah, that he is. Coma or no coma." He handed Steve and Sam shot glasses as well. "To Natasha." He raised his glass.

Steve looked her deeply in the eyes and she realized that she still had feelings for him. _Shit_. "To Natasha." He murmured softly and emptied his glass.

The bar was soon filled with Sam and Bucky's friends and she tried to flirt with a few guys but it just didn't click and it didn't help that she noticed Steve watching her from time to time with a slight frown on his face. What was bothering him _now_?!

She had few drinks and had danced on the dance floor when she decided that it was time to go home. She had a few patients to visit tomorrow morning. Two guys had given her their number but she wouldn't call any of them. They weren't _Steve_. She was at the coat rack looking for her leather jacket when someone joined her.

"Leaving already?" Steve asked her and handed her her leather jacket. "It fell to the floor."

"Thanks. Uh, yes. I have to be at the hospital at nine. Hank and Nick are expecting me for Rummy." She slipped her jacket on. "Thanks for inviting me."

"Let me take you home."

"No." She shook her head. "I'll just call an Uber, but thank you."

"I miss you." Steve suddenly said and he looked shocked that he'd said it.

"What?"

"Things are weird since that evening and I...Did I do something wrong?" He looked like a lost puppy.

"No. It's nothing. We were both just busy with work." She forced herself to smile. She wasn't going to tell him that she had fallen for him. That would just make things even weirder between them. "And we'll probably see less of each other now with your friends being back."

Steve furrowed his eyebrows. "Do you think that you were just a some kind of rebound while they were overseas? Nat, I won't drop you just because Buck and Sam are back. God, no. You mean the world to me! You are very important to me." He took her arm and shoved the sleeve of her leather jacket up to reveal her bracelet. "That's why I gave you this. As a sign of my feel-of my friendship to you." His thumb brushed absently over her pulse point on her wrist and she shivered. Steve's gaze landed on her lips and his eyes darkened when she licked them. Maybe she wasn't the only one who wanted more than friendship.

"Steve-" She breathed out and he was already kissing her. At first his kiss was hesitant and barely a brush of his lips against hers, but when she sighed against his lips cupping his face, he _really_ kissed her and her knees got weak. He really knew how to kiss a girl! He kissed her deeply and almost hungrily and she wanted to melt. He pushed her into the jackets on the coat rack and she never wanted to stop kissing him. But she did pull away from him. "We should get out of here." She rasped out.

"Yeah." Steve murmured and ran his thumb over her cheek. "Can I take you home?"

She nodded with a grin and took his hand to drag him out of the bar. They should probably talk about the change in their relationship but they were too busy getting each other out of their clothes on their way through the hallway to her bedroom.

She wore a choker the next day to hide the hickeys that Steve had left on her neck but Hank and Nick both noticed them. Just like Peggy Carter who wanted to know everything about Natasha's new boyfriend.


	73. Freaky friday

_One of Tony and Bruce's experience goes wrong causing Natasha and Bucky to swap bodies. Steve has no idea about it when he goes to Bucky for girl advice._

* * *

Natasha took the elevator down to Tony and Bruce's lab to give Bruce some of the tea she liked so much. They'd talked about his time in India and his love for tea and she'd promised him to let him try some of her favorite kind that she imported from Russia.

Tony and Bruce were standing in front of some kind of machine that she hadn't seen in here before. They must have built it recently. Barnes was also in the lab sitting in a chair watching the two scientists. She figured he was here because Tony wanted to take a look at his arm.

She nodded at him before she walked over to Bruce's desk to drop off her gift for him. He was probably so deep in thought that he wouldn't even notice her if she spoke to him but he would know that the tea was from her when he would spot it.

"Do you guys even know what you're doing?" Bucky asked from where he was sitting.

Tony didn't look up while he was typing something into the keypad of the machine. "Of course! You're witness to something that will change the world, Captain Comrade!"

Oh God, what had they done _now_?! She should probably get out of here before that thing would blow up. Maybe she shouldn't have finished that thought because in that exact moment the machine started to shake and make funny noises. Yeah, that was definitely not good.

"Fuck! Get down!" Bruce yelled before he tackled Tony to the ground.

She was about to run away when a metal arm grabbed her and a heavy body threw itself over her. Some kind of light beam hit her and Barnes before he pushed her to the ground.

Her body felt weird. She had felt a tingle when the beam hit her and now something just felt off. _Wrong_. Her left arm was slightly numb, but it was also buzzing. Was she having a heart attack?

She opened her eyes and blinked a few times. "Natasha, are you okay?" She heard Bruce ask in the background.

"I think so." She replied, but that wasn't her voice. No, her voice wasn't that deep and _male_. What the fuck?! She looked down her body and that was _definitely_ not her body! And her left arm felt so weird and different because it was a bionic one! What the fuck?!

"Man, the fuck was that?" She heard her own voice next to her. She turned her head and was looking at _herself_. Jesus, that was just fucking weird. If she was in Barnes' body, did that mean that- "Why is my voice so fucking high?" Barnes looked down his, _her_ body. "What the fuck?!" He stared at her, well at himself. "Are you...Did we-?"

"Swap bodies? Yeah, I think so." She replied and stood up, running towards Tony and lifted him up with one hand. Man, being this strong was pretty nice. "Undo this! Now!" She snarled at him and Tony looked terrified for a second before he collected himself.

"I would, but I don't know how. I have to find out how this happened before I can undo it." She let him down. "We were trying to make teleportation possible and not _this_." Tony grinned. "But hey, now you don't have to fantasize about what you would do if you were in a body of the opposite sex."

"Shut up." Bucky hissed and it was so weird to hear her voice like this. It sounded so different than what she'd heard it when she was speaking. Was that really how her voice sounded? "Banner, can you fix it?"

She turned to look at him as well. Bruce had least had the decency to look guilty. "I think so. Once we know what happend, we should be able to reverse it. But it might take some time. A few hours at least."

 _Great_. She clenched her jaw and sat down on one of the chairs in the lab. It was foreign to be so tall and muscular. Being petite had always been an advantage. No one paid attention to a small woman, but people looked twice at a tall and build man. God, she wanted to be back in her own fucking body!

Tony cleared his throat. "Could we maybe keep this between the four of us? Like can we not tell Cap about this? I think he's still mad about Ultron and I don't want to piss him off again."

Oh shit! She was going to the movies with Steve tonight! Well, she should probably cancel that as long as she was still in Barnes' body. And she didn't want anyone to know about the whole body swap as well. It was kind of embarrassing. "Let's not talk to anyone about this. We try to avoid people until we're back in our own bodies."

Barnes nodded. "Yeah, I agree. The less people know about this, the better. And hurry up! No offence, but I prefer my own body!"

* * *

She didn't know where Barnes went but she was in the gym testing her new and temporarily body. She wanted to know what it can do. She would never be a super soldier, but maybe she would have to fight one in the future and it would help if she knew how the body worked.

She was now used to the feeling of the arm and curious to see what it can do. She'd had no problem to lift the weights with just her left arm. She wondered how much she could lift. She had seen Steve throw motorcycles. Could she do that as well? It probably wasn't a good idea to go the garage and start throwing bikes and cars around, though.

She wanted to test that famous super stamina and got onto the treadmill. She was curious to see how many miles she could run until she was out of breath. She had run over twenty five miles in one hour and was only slightly sweating when she heard the doors of the gym opening. Shit! So much for Jarvis warning her if someone wanted to use the gym!

"Ah, Buck! Good thing I run into you!" She heard Steve behind her saying. Shit, shit! Why didn't those super serums come with the ability to turn oneself invisible?!

"Hi." She didn't turn around, hoping he would just start his work out and she could leave. She was good at pretending to be someone else, but she didn't think she could convince Steve that she was his best friend. And she didn't want to lie to Steve but she also didn't want him to know about the whole thing.

Of course, she wasn't so lucky that Steve would ignore her, or rather his best friend, and he showed up in front of the treadmill. "I need your advice, Buck."

She didn't stop running. "Okay."

"It's pretty important. Could you maybe stop for a second?"

"Sure." She didn't want to, but she got off the treadmill. "So, what's wrong?"

"I'm going to the movies with Nat tonight-" Shit, she forgot to cancel him! She doubted that Bruce and Tony fixed their mess by tonight. "And I...I want to tell her how I feel about her."

"Uh-huh. Wait, _what_?!" She was glad that she wasn't on the treadmill anymore or she would have landed on her face. Or rather Barnes' face. Could the serum regrow teeth? "How you feel about m- her?"

"Don't act so surprised!" Steve looked almost offended. "You've been telling me for ages to finally man up and tell her that I'm in love with her!"

 _In love_. What?! He was in love with her?! With _her_? God, she had to sit down. "You love Natasha?" She managed to get out.

"Yeah." Steve looked at her funny. "You already knew that. So how should I tell her? Should I tell her that I love her or should I just say that I have feelings for her?Should I tell her before or after the movie?"

She just wanted to run away. _Steve Rogers_ loved her. That was a lot to process. She knew that he liked her better than the others, but she always thought that it was just a silly crush because she was pretty much the only female he was hanging out with.

"Why tell her now?"

"Because she deserves to know." Steve said with a soft smile. "I just want her to know that there's someone who loves her. And I can't keep pretending that I don't love her. I don't expect her to feel the same, I just want her to know that she's loved."

It would probably be weird if she started crying now, right? Why would Bucky Barnes cry over something like this? "Uh, I mean... _why_ do you love her?"

Steve raised an eyebrow. "Really? Didn't you say that you would ask her out if it weren't for my feelings for her? What's not to love?" Steve sighed dreamily and she almost grinned. She was totally overwhelmed with the whole situation and kind of freaking out but she was also flattered that Steve was, well, in love with her. She knew that she liked him more than just a friend but she was never brave enough to put a label on it. "She's funny and kind. She helped me with everything once I started working for SHIELD. She was always there for me. She listened to me and never judged me. She's fiercely loyal and compassionate and she always has to pet every dog and cat we see when we're out. She tells the worst jokes and looks so proud when she makes a joke about my age. Her laughter is my favorite sound in the world..." Steve blushed a little. "I got a little bit carried away, didn't I?"

She blinked at him. She would have really liked for him to keep talking about her like that, but why would Barnes want to hear his best friend gush about her? Did she want Steve to tell her that he loved her? Shouldn't she be selfless and let him go? Tell him right now as his best friend to move on from her? To fall in love with someone else? Did she love him? No, she wasn't ready to go there yet, but she couldn't deny that she felt something for him. How could she not?

"I think that if you really love her, then you should tell her that. Just tell her and then see what happens."

Steve nodded. "You're right. I waited long enough." He laughed nervously. "Can't believe I'm finally gonna do it. Thanks, Buck."

"You're welcome...Punk." She got out when Steve was already on his way out of the gym. God, what the fuck had just happened?!

She was more than relieved when Jarvis informed her two hours later that Bruce and Tony were positive that they found a solution to the body swapping problem. But that still left her with the whole Steve thing. What was she gonna do about that?!

* * *

She was back in her own body, waiting in her apartment at the Avengers Tower for Steve to show up at her door. She hadn't cancelled their movie night and she wondered if it was actually a date, but now she wished she had cancelled. She felt incredibly bad that _she_ had been actually the one Steve had talked to earlier today. She should have stopped him before he'd told her that he was in love with her. What was she gonna say to him? She couldn't tell him that she loved him, too. It wouldn't be true, would it? Was what she felt for him already love? She groaned and looked at the watch on her phone. Steve would be here any second now. Should she pretend that she had no idea about what he would tell her tonight? No, that didn't seem right.

Steve knocked on her door and she got up from her couch, taking a deep breath. She would have to tell him everything. She opened the door and Steve was standing in front of her with a bouquet of flowers in his hands. Oh, shit. He was really gonna tell her, wasn't he?

"Hi, Nat." He seemed nervous, but he had it mostly under control. "These are for you."

She accepted the flowers. "Thank you. Please come in. We have to talk." She walked back inside her apartment.

"Okay." He sounded confused. "About what? There's actually something I have to tell you, too."

She quickly put the flowers in a vase and put them on the kitchen counter. "I know." She took a deep breath. "You weren't talking to Bucky this afternoon. You were talking to me."

"Huh?"

"Bruce and Tony's experience went wrong and Barnes and I switched bodies. They fixed it, I'm back in my own body." She had never been so nervous before. "I know what you're going to tell me, because you technically already told me."

Steve's face went pale. "I don't...You and Bucky switched..But you're okay now?" She nodded. "And you-" He closed his eyes. "God, that's not how I wanted you...How did you even switch..." He stopped speaking and just stared at her. "I can't believe you already know."

"I'm sorry, Steve." She looked down at the kitchen counter between them. "I should have told you who I really was when you came into the gym."

"I've envisioned telling you the truth many, many times and none of the scenarios were like this." Steve laughed. "How do you feel about it?"

"I...I don't really know. Why me?"

Steve smiled softly. "You already asked me that. At least now I know why Bucky was acting so strange. You see me as Steve and not Captain America. You're always there for me. You make me happy. So damn happy, Nat. How could I not have fallen in love with you? I don't expect you to feel the same or to even say it back. I just want you to know that I love you."

She bit her lip and her heart was racing in her chest. She never felt like this before. Hearing him say these three words to her was _amazing_. She wasn't freaking out anymore, no, she felt calm. "Do you want to go on a date with me? I mean we already wanted to go to the movies, but we could go to dinner before that?"

A smile was slowly lighting up Steve's beautiful face. "Really? I would love that."

She walked around the corner of the kitchen isle. "Yes." She nodded. "I want to go on a date with you. I think I've wanted that for a long time, I just didn't realize it until today."

Steve walked her to her door after their first official date and she kissed him goodnight before he left to get to his own floor at the Tower.

It took her several months, but one morning when they were still in bed, she whispered to him that she loved him, too.


	74. New York (AU)

_AU Natasha Romanoff is the mayor's chief of staff and has to work with artist Steve Rogers on an art project for the city._

* * *

Natasha was very proud of her job. She was the youngest person ever to be appointed Chief of Staff by mayor Nick Fury. She was in that position for a year now and she loved it. Fury was a great boss who actually cared about the people of New York and she was proud to lead his staff. Together they all would change New York for the better, she just knew it.

She checked her tote for her laptop and the files she had taken home with her and gave her cat Liho a pet on the head before she would leave her house. She knew how lucky she was that her parents had left her a townhouse in Manhattan. She had thought about selling it because it was a bit big for just one person, but she couldn't just sell the house she had grown up in. So she decided to adopt a cat and Liho loved to run around the house all day and she didn't feel so guilty that the little furball was alone most of the day.

She grabbed the tumbler filled with coffee and left the house, walking to the subway station near by to get to city hall.

She dropped her bag off in her office before she walked to the conference room for the daily staff meeting. The meetings always took at least thirty minutes where they talked about current projects. It was May and they were preparing the Fourth of July. And on top of that Mayor Fury had announced that he and the Governor were planning to legalize weed and the phones hadn't stopped ringing ever since. Which reminded her that she had to call the office of the Governor this week.

"Natasha?"

She was almost out of the room when she heard her boss calling her. "Yes?"

"I need a minute."

She nodded and walked back inside. "What's up?"

"Remember your art project we talked about?"

"Yes, of course!" Would he finally green-light it? She had presented Fury with the idea of helping young and _troubled_ kids by letting them embellish New York City with art. She wanted those kids to see that they weren't useless like society claimed them to be, and New York would get a little bit more colorful. The teenagers could make connections and the project could be some kind of social work so they don't have to go to juvie just because they stole some lipstick or got caught smoking weed since it was still illegal.

"I talked to the party and they want to do it."

"Really?" She smiled at her boss. "That's great news! I already have a list of social workers who would be perfect for the job."

"Yeah, well...You might want to wait with that."

"Why?" The sooner they started, the more kids they could help!

"They want an artist to lead the project." Fury explained with a frown. "They think it's good press. We have to give them that because the city can't do all the founding for the project. The rest of the money comes from the party."

Natasha gritted her teeth. Fucking politics! She wouldn't be surprised if the most promising presidential candidate of the party would later say that they came up with the idea. She could think of at least two potential candidates from New York.

"Great, just great. We don't need some Banksy! We need social workers and people with connections to colleges and education programs!"

Fury sighed. "I know that. You don't have to tell me that. Let's just hope that they send us a good person and not just someone who just wants to work on their image."

"We can't even choose someone?!"

"No, I'm sorry, Natasha."

Now, that was just great! She left the conference room to get to her office to get the work done for the day. _Unbelievable_! She spent the rest of the work day at her laptop and on her phone and was one of the last staffers to leave the office. She was still mad that the party hijacked her project for good publicity. Wouldn't a project lead by social workers be good enough press? Why did it need some fancy schmancy artist?!

She was still fuming when she walked into the bar to meet her friends for some after work drinks. Pepper and Maria were already there and a martini was already waiting for her.

"Hi." She greeted her friends before she almost emptied the glass in one big gulp.

"Are you okay?" Pepper asked with a raised eyebrow, taking a sip from her wine.

"Yeah. No."

"Yes or no, Nat?" Maria shoved the little bowl with nuts over to her.

She took a handful of nuts and tossed them into her mouth. "My art project got green-lit."

"That's amazing!" Pepper exclaimed before she frowned. "Why aren't you happy about that?!"

"Because the party and donors want some artist to lead the whole project to get attention and good press. Who knows who they choose! The wrong person can ruin the whole project! I didn't want this to be some PR thing for the next presidential candidate, I just wanted some teenagers get a chance to change their lives!" She groaned out and buried her face in her hands.

"Just wait until you know who will work with you." Maria patted her back. "I highly doubt some arrogant and self obsessed artist wants to do such a project. Maybe you'll get someone who does it because he cares about the cause as well."

She looked up at Maria. Maybe her friend had a point. Only a good person would sacrifice their time for a charity thing, right?

"Will you still be able to hire social workers?" Pepper asked.

"Yeah, actually with the cash injection of the party we can get more people for the project."

"See!" Pepper smiled. "You probably won't even see much of whoever is supposed to head your project. They probably only show up for the photo op."

* * *

She had been busy with other work in the next two weeks and barely had time to think about the project when she got the news that the artist had been chosen and she would meet him soon. So, it was a guy. She wasn't so sure if the woman on the phone had told her the name of the artist since the connection had been bad so she couldn't google him. She just heard that he was from Brooklyn and really looking forward to it. She knew that he wouldn't be paid so she hoped that he had accepted the project because he wanted to help and not because his image needed to be improved.

Natasha got a mail the next day informing her about the new development of the project and she finally knew the name of the artist. Steve Rogers. She never heard of him but that didn't have to mean anything. She wasn't an artsy person and wasn't part of the New Yorker art scene. She started to type his name into Google when someone knocked on her door.

"Come in." She yelled and looked up from her screen.

A tall, blond and _very_ handsome man opened the door. "Miss Romanoff? I'm Steve Rogers." So _this_ was Steve Rogers. He didn't look like an artist, more like a real life Ken doll. "I'm sorry to barge in like this, but I thought I should introduce myself."

She nodded. "Yes, please come in." She told him with a smile. She would be polite and nice for now until she knew what kind of person he was. Years of being in politics had given her the ability to read people. Once she knew what kind of character he was, she would decided how to deal with him. She wouldn't let him ruin this project. "It's nice to meet you, Mister Rogers."

"Likewise, Miss Romanoff." Rogers smiled at her kindly and sat down after she told him to. He almost appeared to be nervous. "I just wanted to say how grateful I am to work with you on this project. I've had some run ins with the police when I was a teenager and I think that this project can help a lot of kids."

"Run ins with the police?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Well, I..." He blushed a little. "I've got in a lot of fights when I was in high school. There were a lot of bullies in my neighborhood and I couldn't just ignore them. I got into a similar project back then instead of getting charged with anything. That project probably saved my future, so I'm more than happy to help give other kids that chance."

She studied him for a moment. He seemed like a nice guy and maybe the fact that he had been through something familiar would be helpful. He didn't look like he was doing it to for fame. "There is still paperwork to do, but we should soon be able to start with the project. You'll be more of the face of the whole thing and the social workers will do the actual work. But I'm sure a few kids would benefit from hearing the reason why you're doing this."

Rogers nodded. "Just call me as soon as you're ready to start. I'll do whatever you need me to do. I already have a few ideas." He smiled and stood up. "It was nice to meet you, Miss Romanoff."

"You, too." She answered truthfully. She hit search as soon as Rogers had left her office to find out more about him. He even had his own Wikipedia page! It looked like he was really successful with his work, judging by the prices it got sold. Holy shit, who would pay 80,000$ just for a pencil drawing of the Brooklyn Bridge?! She found a few profiles on him from Vanity Fair and the New Yorker and they all pictured him as a decent guy who had grown up with nothing and risen to fame in his late twenties after he had left the army.

Was she really so lucky and she had gotten sent someone who would actually help her with the project and not be in her way?

* * *

Steve Rogers turned out to be one of the good guys. He wasn't in her way, but offered his input when she asked him to. She read the article in the New York Times more than once where he mentioned her and the team of social workers numerous times. The office got a lot of calls after that with people wanting to donate art supplies and some even offering rooms for counseling.

The project was going well and already twenty teenagers had signed up. Steve had found a restaurant that wanted a mural in their backyard and got to work with the kids. It looked really beautiful and she told their social media manager to share it on the city's social media accounts which resulted in more people asking for murals or even graffiti. She was delighted when she heard that two of the kids were so good that a private school offered them scholarships. Another one had gotten a job offer from the restaurant and hopefully he wouldn't have to steal anymore to support his family.

She met with Rogers from time to time so he could update her. She could see in his eyes how much the project and kids meant to him. He had good connections and even got one kid an internship at Stark Industries. She had been more than surprised when she had found out that Steve knew Pepper's on and off boyfriend Tony Stark. The world was really small.

She managed to leave the office earlier today and decided to check on the kids. She only had met a few of them and she wanted to see how the newest members of the group were doing, and thankfully the newest art project was on Broadway which wasn't far away from City Hall. She walked to the theater that had asked for a make over of their waiting lounge. She had gotten Maria's boyfriend Sam Wilson involved, who was a VA counselor and good craftsman, and he agreed to help the kids with building furniture for the lounge.

She walked through the open front door and no one was here. They had already started on a beautiful mural that seemed to incorporate scenes of different musicals, and a few sitting benches were done. So far it looked really good.

"Hello? Anyone here?" Her voice echoed through the room.

"Miss Romanoff? Hi!" She turned around and Steve Rogers was standing behind her with Sam just walking through the door.

"Hey, Nat!"

"Hi. Um, where is everyone?"

Sam laughed. "We sent them home. Teenagers can only pay attention for so long. A few had to study."

"Ah, okay." She nodded absently and looked back at the mural. It was really beautiful.

"Here." She turned around and Rogers was handing her a water bottle. She accepted it gratefully since it was a hot New York Summer day.

"Thanks."

"So what brings you here?" Sam joined them.

She took a sip of water. "I just wanted to check in on you since it's not that far away from the office. It looks great so far. The mural looks amazing."

"Yeah, the kids really put their effort into this." Rogers smiled and she nodded. She was so glad that the project was a success and the kids had fun.

"And Steve's a great artist. Always has been." Sam chimed in and Rogers shoved with him his elbow.

"Do you know each other?"

Sam nodded. "Yeah, we served together. He was Special Ops and I was Air Force. I thought you knew that?"

"No." She shook her head and then looked at Rogers. "Do you know all my friends' boyfriends?"

Rogers laughed and she had to admit that he had a great laugh on top of that pretty face, hot body and that nice personality. "I don't think so." Sam left to pick up Maria from work so she ended up being alone with Rogers. "Can I buy you some ice cream?"

That offer surprised her, but it was so hot and how turned down free ice cream. "Yeah, sure."

He smiled and they walked to the nearest ice cream parlor after Rogers had locked the theater. They decided to take their ice cream to Central Park and were lucky enough to find an empty bench underneath a tree.

"Thank you for taking on this project."

Rogers smiled. "Thank _you_ for including me. The kids are really great and I finally feel like I'm doing something again that matters. So I should thank you."

"You shouldn't really thank me. I was actually vivid when I was informed that they wanted an artist to lead the project. I thought it would take away from the actual cause, but I was wrong. You're the right person for it."

"Thanks, I think."

She chuckled and finished her ice cream. She talked with him more about the project and he told her about the kids and they somehow ended up on a first name basis. And they exchanged numbers and Steve promised her to send her regular updates on the project since she wasn't really involved in it anymore.

* * *

Natasha was now texting with Steve pretty much daily. It had started with only messages about the project, but soon they just started to talk to each other about anything and everything.

They talked about food they liked, what shows they were currently watching, and just things that had happend to them during to the day. She thought it was safe to say that they were some kind of friends. Steve had even invited her to his birthday party and she promised to show up after she'd made an appearance at the city's Fourth of July party. She thought it was kind of hilarious that he was born on the Fourth of July. How patriotic of him.

She decided to use her lunch break today to buy new sleeping wear. It was so hot during the night and she hoped that some pjs made out of silk or satin would help her stay cool during the night. She walked into her favorite lingerie store and found a few pieces that she liked. She also saw a few bras that she wanted to try on and took them with her to the dressing room.

She tried the sleeping wear on and decided to buy two new camisoles and the fitting sleeping shorts. Both sets were made out of silk and thanks to the Fourth of July sale cheaper than usual. She tried the bras on next and liked the ivory one a lot. But it was pretty expensive, even with the sale, and she wasn't sure if she should get it. She got her phone out of her purse and opened her texting conversation with Pepper while looking at herself in the mirror. She looked pretty good in it. And the girls did too. She quickly snapped a pic of herself and sent it to Pepper.

 _Yay or nay? The girls look good and the bra is really comfortabl, but it's 139$. Should I get it or not?_

She was thinking about getting the panties as well if she should decided to buy the bra when her phone vibrated in her hand with Pepper's text.

 _Um, I don't think you meant to send this to me, right?!_

 _Right?! Or did you mean for me to get it?_

Another text appeared only seconds later. What was going on with Peps? Pepper had sent her photos of herself in lingerie before to ask for her opinion.

 _Also, bras cost that much?! WTF!_

Huh? Pepper bought her underwear at even more expensive shops. What was going on? Her gaze glanced upwards and she read the name on top of her screen. _Steve Rogers._ She had sent Steve a photo of herself in only a bra asking for his opinion! _Jesus_! Oh God! Oh God! What was she supposed to fucking do now?! What was she supposed to text back?

 _I can see that you read my text._

Shit!

 _I think that you didn't mean to send this to me. I'll delete the photo, don't worry. And I'll never speak of it again. I promise._

She started to type an answer when he sent her another text.

 _You look beautiful. You should get it._

Her cheeks were getting warm and it had nothing to do with her embarrassment.

 _Forget I just wrote that. Like I forget you sent me that pic._

She couldn't help, but smile at that. _Thank you and I am so SORRY!_

She was almost glad that Steve didn't text her back. She changed back into her clothes and walked with the items thrown over her arm to the register. She felt a little bad when she handed the woman her credit card, but she had to have that bra. She blushed when she caught herself picturing Steve seeing her in real life in it and wondering how he would react to her. What kind of lover was he? Gentle and giving, or rough and just taking what he wanted? Hopefully a mix of both. Why was she thinking about that? She put her credit card back into her wallet and accepted the shopping bag the girl handed her. She wished her a good day and left the store.

Was she attracted to Steve Rogers? Did she _want_ him to see her in her underwear or maybe even less? God, had she unconsciously sent him this pic on purpose?!

* * *

True to his word, Steve acted like he hadn't gotten a pic of her half-naked the two times she had seen him in the next week. Texting with him had been a bit awkward right after the whole nude accident, but they were soon back to their old forth and back texting. She had so much to do that she couldn't even think about the possibility that she was attracted to him.

Maria sent her a text, inviting her over for dinner, and Natasha happily accepted. Sam was a great cook and she hadn't had a home-cooked meal in ages, she just didn't have the time to cook in the last weeks. She stuck her head into Fury's office to wish him a good night and then stopped by a bodega to get Baileys and a tub of ice cream.

Maria opened the door with a smile on her face and Natasha was already greeted with the smell of Sam's famous gumbo. Mm, she was starving! She handed her friend the alcohol and ice cream, and followed her into the kitchen where Sam was standing in front of the hob, stirring his gumbo. And next to him was _Steve_ , sipping on a beer.

"Uh, hi." She had no idea that he would be here.

"Hey!" Sam grinned and nodded at her. "Dinner's almost done."

"Hi, Natasha." Steve smiled warmly at her and she couldn't help but to return it. He really had such a warm and kind presence. You just had to feel comfortable around him. "Good to see you."

"Yeah, you too."

Sam's gumbo was delicious as always and Natasha learned more about how Sam and Steve knew each other. They had met at boot camp, had been at the same Army base in Afghanistan for some time, but then lost contact after they'd returned home. And now thanks to the art project they had found each other again, amazed that they both lived in New York.

"I guess we have to thank Nat for reuniting us." Sam laughed and refilled her ice cream bowl with Baileys. "Thanks, Nat."

"Yeah! Thanks, Nat!" Steve boomed with flushed cheeks and she wondered if he'd had too much Baileys. She couldn't help but laugh because he looked down right adorable right now.

"Yeah, thanks Nat, for reuniting these star-crossed lovers." Maria smirked. "Sam won't stop talking about Steve. It's only a matter of time until he leaves me for him."

"Hey, you haven't seen him shirtless yet, babe!" Sam grinned and leaned over to kiss Maria's cheek.

She and Steve both looked at each other and blushed. _He_ had seen her shirtless. It was no big deal, she told her herself for the thousandth time. The bra hadn't been see through, so it was like she had been wearing a bikini top, right? _Right_?!

It was after midnight when she decided it was time for her to go home and Steve immediately offered to walk her home or to share a cab with her. He told her that a woman shouldn't be out alone at this time, sounding caring and not patronizing, so she agreed to him walking her home. She didn't live that far away and it was a warm summer night.

Steve told her about his art and that he would soon have an art exhibit in Brooklyn and invited her to the opening which reminded her of another invitation.

"So what do you want for your birthday?"

"Huh? Right, my birthday. You don't have to get me anything, Nat. _Natasha_ , I mean of course."

"You can call me Nat. You've seen me in my bra after all." She joked and Steve laughed, but he looked like he wasn't sure if he was allowed to.

"I deleted it. And I didn't tell anyone about the whole thing."

"I know." She just knew that he was telling the truth. He was an honest guy, he wouldn't lie about something like that. "I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable. I really thought I sent that pic to Pepper."

"Why would I be uncomfortable about a beautiful woman sending me a photo of her?" He said and immediately blushed. "Oh God! Forget that I just said that!"

"You think I'm beautiful, huh?" She grinned, secretly feeling _very_ flattered. "Good to know." Steve got even redder and she just thought it was the cutest thing ever. They reached her house and she stopped walking. "This is me. Thanks for walking me home, Steve."

"No problem." He waved her off. "I had a good time tonight with you. Uh, and Maria and Sam of course!"

"Yeah, me too."

He leaned briefly forward, then pulled back and ended up awkwardly patting her shoulder. She almost laughed. It looked like he had wanted to kiss her at first but then his courage had left him. And she almost cried out in frustration because she realized that she wanted him to kiss her.

"Goodnight, Nat."

"Goodnight, Steve. Sweet dreams." She whispered, leaning forward to brush her lips briefly against his. "I'll see you."

Steve blinked at her a few times and she was about to walk up her stairs when he gently grabbed her wrist to make her look at him. "Uh...Do you wanna go out with me sometime? On a date? If you want?"

Oh, _Steve_. God, he was so damn adorable and sexy at the same time. A very dangerous combination. "Yes, I'll go on a date with you. You want me to wear my new bra?"

"Uh, I mean if you want...if you want to?" He stumbled out and she didn't miss how his gaze briefly flickered to her chest before he looked back into her eyes. She smirked at him. "How does dinner and a movie sound? There's an open air cinema in Brooklyn, we could go there."

She nodded and patted his cheek. "Sounds great! And maybe you'll find out at the end of date if I'm wearing my new bra." She said with a wink before she walked up the stairs to her front door.

"Why do I have the feeling that you're a little tease?"

She blew him a kiss before she disappeared behind her door, already looking forward to her date with Steve. And she was definitely gonna wear her new bra.


	75. Back to the roots

_Steve's biggest fear comes true- he wakes up in his old and scrawny body._

* * *

Steve woke up feeling funny. He was still exhausted from yesterday's mission and his body ached. He had been hit with an alien beam after pushing Nat out of harm's way and he figured that his body hurt from that. Nat had been mad at him for taking the hit for her, but he'd rather deal with an angry Natasha than her being hurt or something even worse.

He groaned because he wanted to sleep but it was time to get up, he couldn't stay in bed all day. He had been too beat to return to his place in Brooklyn and had slept at the Tower.

God, he felt like shit. Everything hurt and he was just so goddamn tired. He hadn't felt this bad since...since... _No!_ He opened his eyes and pushed away the bedspread. No, no, no, no! That couldn't...No, he had to be still asleep! No! This was a nightmare and not reality! No, he couldn't be back to his old and scrawny self! No! He started to panic and had problems to breathe. Shit, he was on the brink of an asthma attack!

He was trying to calm down and to get air into his lungs when his bedroom door burst open and Natasha came running towards him. Why had it to be _her_?! He didn't want her to see him like _this_!

She was already pressing an inhaler into his mouth before he could do anything. "Shh, just listen to my voice. You're okay. Everything's okay, Steve. Just focus on your breathing. Inhale and exhale, okay?"

 _Everything was okay?! Nothing_ was okay! His biggest fear had come true! The serum stopped working and he was back to being sick and useless! The team didn't have any use for him anymore, he wasn't Captain America anymore. He was just some little guy from Brooklyn. He had always known that the serum was too good to be true and its effect was now gone.

Natasha was stroking his back until he calmed down and his breathing went back to normal. "See?" Natasha smiled. "You're okay."

"I'm not okay!" He snapped and moved away from her and got out of bed. He had to hold up his sweats or otherwise they would drop to the floor. How fucking humiliating! "Are you blind?! I'm...I'm useless like this! Everything that was useful about me is fucking gone! I can't help anyone like this! I can't even walk up stairs without almost dying! I can't even see the color for your hair anymore! I'm fucking useless!"

Natasha came slowly towards him like he was some scared and hurt animal. It just made him even more angry. "You're not useless! Let's get down to the lab to find out what happend. I'm sure it has something to do with what happened yesterday."

"No! I should just leave. This was always bound to happen. I've always known. You're now in charge of the team. I'll hand in my resignation today."

"No, you're not!" Natasha looked angry. "You're going with me to Tony and Bruce so they can find out what happend and how to reverse it. And even if they can't, you're still a valuable member of the team! I'll find you some clothes. Wait here!" She turned around and ordered Jarvis not to let him out of the apartment. Steve figured that Jarvis was also the one who had alerted Natasha when he had his asthma attack.

She came back with a pair of _her_ sweatpants and an old shirt that was a bit too big for her. Both clothing pieces fit him almost perfectly and he was relieved that her sweats were a bit too short for him. At least he was still an inch or so taller than her.

They didn't talk to each other on their way to the lab. All he wanted was to go home and to hide there forever. He didn't want to be like _this_ , he'd hoped that this part of his life had been over. But now he wasn't tall and strong anymore. He was just, he was just some joke.

* * *

"I can't explain it." Bruce announced after he had probed and poked Steve. "The serum is still in your veins. I don't know why it's not _working_ at the moment."

"Can I go now?" Steve asked, rubbing the spot his arm where Bruce had taken his blood. He didn't matter that the serum was still in his system, it clearly didn't work anymore and it never would again.

Natasha glared at him. "You think you can reverse it, Bruce? Get the serum back to working again?"

"I'll do what I can. It would help if I knew how that alien tech works that we confiscated yesterday. Let's hope that Tony finds something out." He walked over to a medicine cabinet and pulled a few meds out, handing them to Steve. "Take these. They should help with your symptoms. We know so much more now about your diseases than we did back then."

"Thanks." He murmured and accepted the meds. At least that was something and he hadn't had to worry about how to afford his medication like he had used to. "I'm going home now."

"You don't want to stay here? Wait until Tony and Bruce know more?" Natasha asked with her hands on her hips and he knew that she was pissed. Why was she pissed? _He_ had every reason to be fucking angry. His old life was over now. All he could do now was find a good doctor near his apartment since Steve would have to show up there probably weekly and find a new purpose in his new life. Maybe he'd find a job as an illustrator or something like that. "Steve?!"

Right, Nat was talking to him. "No, I'm going home. You can call me if you have news, but I already know it won't be good ones."

"I'm coming with you." Natasha decided and he knew that there was nothing that he could do to stop her. Not with this sick and weak body, and he wasn't even sure if he could have stopped her if he had been still Captain America.

"Fine, do whatever the fuck you want." Steve murmured out and Tony walked into the lab.

"Well, aren't you a joy to be around with." Tony quipped. "I dug everything out that SHIELD has on alien technology. Don't worry, Stevie! You're soon back to being all muscularly and tense. Now you're only tense. Though, I have to admit that I like the fact that I'm currently taller than you."

"Fuck off." He snapped at Tony before he stormed out of the room with Natasha hot on his heels.

"I can't believe I'm saying this but you should be nicer to Tony." She hissed when they were in the elevator. "He's helping you. I would have never thought that your politeness and sweetness was a side effect of the serum, and that Steve Rogers is actual an asshole."

"Excuse me?" Why on earth wasn't she leaving him alone?!

"I know that you're going through something right now, but that doesn't give you the right to treat us all like shit. If anyone can find out what happened then it's Tony and Bruce. They'll fix it."

He didn't answer her, he just crossed his arms over his chest. God, his bones were so pointy!

"And now the silent treatment, very mature!" Natasha sighed. He knew that he was acting like an ass, but it..it was just a lot to take in. Being Captain America- helping and protecting people- that was all he had ever wanted and now it was gone. He couldn't help or protect anyone like this. "Look Steve, I get that you're upset, but we don't even know if it's permanent and even if it is- it's not the end of the world. There are still things that you can do. This is not the end of you being an Avenger."

He snorted. "Sure it is. They wouldn't let me join the army in this state and you guys won't let me go into the field like this. It's over, Nat."

"Science is so much further than it used to be. I'm sure most of your problems can be treated. I train you, you can build up some muscle. Just because you're not enhanced anymore, doesn't mean you're not useful anymore. Tony's not enhanced, neither are Sam nor Clint."

"Tony is a genius and Sam and Clint won't passed out after running a mile."

"You went to boot camp and didn't die-" Natasha grinned. "There's still hope for you."

He appreciated Natasha's attempts of cheering him up, but he just wasn't in the mood for it. "I just wanna go home."

Natasha nodded. "Fine. We'll sit on your couch, watch movies, and as long as we wait for Tony and Bruce's call you're allowed to wallow in self pity. But afterwards we either go back to the Tower to reverse the whole thing, or we'll start training so you know how to fight with your new body."

"Old body." He corrected, desperately wishing that he was still sleeping and everything was just a stupid nightmare.

* * *

Steve knew that it was pointless to try to convince Natasha not to come with him and so he opened the door of his apartment for her and followed her inside. He was just thankful that none of his neighbors had seen him. God, how would they even explain that Captain America wasn't on the team anymore? Would he have to go into hiding? Maybe that was for the best.

"I think we should order Chinese and start some show." She told him while she walked into his living room. "We're probably the last two people on this planet who haven't seen _Stranger Things_ yet." She plopped down on his couch with a smile on her face. "Come, sit. We'll just start the show and order food when we're hungry." She patted the spot next to her. "We haven't done anything like this in so long, Steve. This can be our first date."

He just stared at her. He had completely forgotten that he had finally asked her out last week and they had been about to leave for their date yesterday when they had been called to assemble. God, he had been so focused on his new, _old_ situation that he'd forgotten about that. Of course, fate would be that cruel to him. He'd finally asked his dream girl out and then he got turned back into the ugly frog.

"You don't have to stay and you can forget about the date. Don't worry. I know that I'm not...I know that women don't want to date me when I look like this." He couldn't look her into the eyes. He had seen so many beautiful women before looking at him with pity and discomfort. All those girls Bucky had tried to set him up with and who had left the date as soon as possible.

"Why would I want to leave? And I'm not gonna forget about our date. I...that's not easy for me to admit, but I've wanted to go out with you for quite some time now." She sighed. "Can you please look at _me_ and not your feet." He did look up at her and Natasha was softly smiling at him. "Nothing changed for me. I mean, I'm a bit pissed at your behavior from earlier, but I guess I can understand that." She patted the spot next to her on the couch again. "Now come! We've got two seasons ahead of us."

"You don't have to do this. Please don't pretend like _this_ doesn't bother you. Nat, I'm...Please go." Why didn't she just go? Why did she have to give him hope, when they both knew that she deserved more. A real man. A man who could fight beside her, a man who could protect her, a man who wouldn't get an asthma attack at least once a day. "I know that I'm not the man anymore that you want."

Natasha clenched her jaw and stood up from the couch, marching towards him. She looked furious. "Are you implying that I'm only interested in your super soldier body? Do you think that? Huh? Would you have cancelled our date if I...god I don't know... if I suddenly shrunk down or got asthma or...or grew a third eye on my forehead? Would you stop liking me then?"

"Of course not!"

Natasha growled. "But you think that I'm not attracted to you anymore just because we're the same height now and you have an inhaler in your pocket? Seriously? Do you really think that low of me? Looks don't fucking matter! I thought we both knew that better than anyone!"

He felt like she slapped him because she looked so upset. "I didn't meant it like that. I-"

"I think I know exactly what you mean. And what you think about me." She walked past by him. "I'm leaving. Remember to take your meds and to leave your phone on in case Bruce or Tony call. I think it's better if you don't call me for some time."

"Natasha, I-"

"Save it." She was already at his door. "I thought you were different, but you boys are all the same." She said with her back to him and then left his apartment.

Fuck! He didn't mean for her to get upset, he just...he just wanted to get over with the inevitable. There was no point. She was an Avenger and he...and he wasn't anymore. He didn't fit into her life anymore and he didn't want to hold her back. And he knew that he wasn't attractive like this. And he couldn't offer Natasha the life she deserved. Natasha was an exciting woman who deserved an exciting life and he could literally die because of the littlest things. He couldn't even see the unique green of her beautiful eyes anymore.

* * *

He spent the next three hours wallowing in self pity and thinking about Natasha. He shouldn't have said those things to her. He had let his anger about his situation out on her and that hadn't been fair. She had only ever known him in his enhanced body and not the original model. He had judged her without really listening to her. She hadn't treated him differently, she had been nice to him and he had been an ass to her. God, he was such a moron. Not him turning back into a shrimp had ruined anything that could have happened between them, no, he had done that.

The ringing of his phone interrupted his train of thoughts and he picked it up to check who was calling him. Maybe Nat? Or Bruce and Tony with news? The number was blocked, but that wasn't unusual.

"Hello?"

"Hey, punk." Bucky greeted him. "Heard you're back to being a little punk?"

"How do you know that?!" Did everyone on the team know by now what had happened?

"Banner contacted me to ask if I know anything about the serum since HYDRA gave me a similar one, but I couldn't help him. Sorry."

"It's okay. Are you still in Malaysia?"

"Yup, mission's running smoothly. So, how are you feeling?"

Steve snorted. "You have to ask? I feel like shit. My body hurts, I forgot how weak this body is. I'm completely useless."

"Now that's not true." Bucky tried to comfort him. How _nice_. "You've always been an annoying punk, but your heart was always in the right place. We both know you were chosen for a reason for that program. Your new muscles didn't turn you into a good man. _You_ always were one."

"I can't go into the field anymore."

"You don't even know yet if it's permanent. And you're still a great tactician. Even if you're stuck like this, there's still work for you. Don't give up, Steve. I thought you were a fighter! Where's the little guy who always picked fights with bullies?"

"I don't know. I think I've been relying too much on the serum and got lost of who I am. It's just been a shock...the whole thing. I was always scared that it would happen and now it did, Buck. I'm just scared. I liked being strong and healthy. And being taller than _you_."

Bucky laughed. "Yeah, I love you too. It sounds like you've lost sight of who you truly are. You're Steve Rogers and not just Captain America. Cap is worth nothing without Steve Rogers."

"You're right. I've been an ass today. Mostly to Natasha." He whispered into the phone. "I accused her of not liking me like this after she wanted to have our first day today."

" _Steve!_ We made it to the 21st century and you still don't know a thing about women. You really think that Natasha cares about looks? The woman who gets constantly reduced to her own looks? You're such an idiot, sometimes!"

"I know. I have to apologize to her. I know that."

"Good! I have to go now, but we'll talk soon. Okay, Stevie?"

"Yeah, take care."

* * *

It was already late in the evening when Bruce finally called him. And he had good news for him. Both he and Tony were convinced that the effect from the laser beam on the serum would fade and he would soon be strong and tall again. They couldn't tell him a time frame but they were sure that it would happen soon. He thought that he would be more relieved about that but he couldn't stop thinking about his fight with Natasha. He cared for her so much, had been sweet on her for ages, and then he had treated her like shit. He wasn't surprised if she never wanted to see him again.

He took a cab to Natasha's place and knocked on her door, praying that she would let him in. He had to apologize to her.

"What?" She asked through the closed door.

"It's me, Steve."

"I know."

"Oh...I...I want to apologize. I am sorry, Natasha. I let my anger and insecurities out on you and that was wrong. I was being a dick to you when you were just kind and helping me. I'm sorry. I judged you without thinking. I know that you're not like those girls back then. You're the only one besides Bucky who really knows me. Who sees me as Steve and not Cap. Even _I_ just saw me as Cap in the last months." He leaned his head against the door. "I forgot who I was and where I came from. The serum has nothing to do with who I am. I decide who I want to be and today I was a total asshole and I am sorry. I shouldn't have said those things to you. I-" He wanted to say more, but suddenly everything hurt so fucking much. His whole body ached and he felt like he was bursting out of his skin. What the fuck was going on? He screamed in pain and fell to the floor.

"Steve?" Natasha's hands were suddenly on him and he felt a little bit better. "Steve, it's okay. Just breathe. I think it'll be over soon. Just focus on my voice. You're doing great."

The pain got worse and worse and he gritted his teeth so hard that he was surprised that they didn't shatter. And then the pain was just gone. He opened his eyes and everything was back in color. Natasha's beautiful green eyes were looking at him with worry. "Steve?"

"I'm okay. I'm fine." He looked down at his body and the sweatpants, Natasha had given him, were ripped. She helped him up and he was looking down at her again. Everything was back to normal. "I am so sorry, Nat."

"For ripping my pants?"

"No, I mean for what I said earlier today. And I guess now also for ripping your pants."

"I think I might have some old SHIELD sweats that'll fit you." She motioned for him to follow her inside her apartment. "I don't think you should walk around New York like that. You might get arrested for public indecency." She disappeared into her bedroom. Was she going to forgive him? Were they still friends? He doubted that she still wanted to go out with him, but he hoped that they were still friends. She came back with black sweatpants on her arms. "These should fit you."

"Thanks." He had no clue why she had sweats that were too big for her, but he wasn't going to ask her. He quickly went into her bathroom to change. His shirt was still intact, but pretty tight. It was almost weird to look like this again. Maybe today was a lesson for him. That he shouldn't forget who he really was and not what he was made into. He came back into the living room where Natasha was waiting for him. "Thanks again. Are we..are we okay?"

"We will be. What you said hurt me, but I can see that you regret it. I forgive you."

"So, we're still friends?" He asked quietly.

"Yeah, we're still friends." She said with a little smile. "We all say stupid things sometimes that we don't mean. I know that I haven't always been very nice to you. I had to deal with the fact that I have feelings for you and you had to deal with the whole mess of today. We're good."

He was almost too afraid to ask. "Do you...do you still have feelings for me? I have them for you."

"Have you ever truly thought that I was only interested in you because of your looks? Be honest with me?" She looked so hurt in that moment that he hated himself.

"No." He answered truthfully. "This wasn't about you. It was about me and my insecurities. I was trying to push you away because I was scared. About what had happend and what was going to happen. You know me, the _real_ me. And I know you. I know that you don't care about those things. I'm sorry."

"Good." She smiled softly and that sight made him way more happier than being tall and strong again. "Then you're going to pick me up tomorrow to take me on a date. I expect flowers and chocolate. I expect you to sweep me off my feet. You've got a lot of making up to do."

"Really? You still wanna go out with me?" He couldn't help but grin like an idiot. She was giving him a second chance? God, he didn't deserve her.

"Yes. Don't mess it up!" She raised her finger playfully at him.

"I won't! He promised her and himself.


	76. Into the woods II (AU)

_AU Bestselling author Natasha enjoys spending time with her new lover Steve in upstate New York, but it's time for her to return to the city._

 _This is a sequel to **Into the Woods** in which Natasha rented a cabin in Upstate New York to work on her new book and met carpenter Steve Rogers!_

* * *

"Wake up, sleepyhead."

Natasha groaned and buried her face in the pillow. Steve was amazing and she loved the time they spent together, but him being an earlier riser annoyed the fuck out of her. He pressed kisses onto her naked back and she smiled into the pillow.

"I know that you're awake, Nat." He whispered against her skin and she tried to fight the chill she got when he brushed his soft beard over her skin. "You wanted to work on your novel all day, remember?"

Yeah, she did. She was kissed by the muse since the night he had showed up at her door to protect her from the criminal that had escaped from prison. The guy hadn't shown up at her cabin (thank God!), but instead she had gotten to know her handsome neighbor better and had fallen into bed with him the next morning. From that point on, she was either writing or spending time with Steve. She was almost done with her book because thanks to Steve her writer's block was gone and the book was almost writing itself.

Steve's arms wrapped themselves around her and he turned her around, pulling her against his broad chest. "I'll make you breakfast, sweetheart." He kissed her temple. "And then you'll write and tonight we're gonna have a candlelight dinner. Sound good?"

"So good." She had never been very romantic or into guys who looked liked sexy lumberjacks, but she was crazy about Steve and she enjoyed his little romantic surprises very much. He was such a sweetheart. "But can we stay a little longer in bed?" She shamelessly placed his hand on her breast.

Steve chuckled into her ear. "You've got something specific on your mind?"

He left to drive into the next big town to get supplies for his newest art project after he'd thoroughly rocked her world and made her french toast for breakfast. She sat down with a smile on her face on the little veranda of her cabin and opened her laptop to work on the last chapter she had written and to hopefully start the next one today.

She read the email that her publisher Fury had written. He was asking when she was coming back to the city since she was almost done with the book. She had to write the next four chapters and then she was done. She was more than relieved that the book was as good as finished because she had felt under pressure ever since her debut novel had been such a success and everyone wanted to know when her next book would be published.

Leaving the city for a few months had been the right decision for her writing process. She didn't think she would have been able to write the book if she had stayed in Manhattan. She knew that she had to go back and she _wanted_ to go back. Her friends and her family lived in New York City. She missed seeing Clint and the others regularly. But she also knew that Steve was the reason why she had written the book so fast. He inspired her and he made her happy. She liked him _a lot_ , she hadn't liked a man this much in so long. He was so good and sweet to her and he was the best lover that she ever had. But she didn't know if they just had an affair or if he was her boyfriend. Was this just some fling for him that would end when she returned to the city? Did he assume that they were just sleeping together? But none of the men that she'd had affairs with had went hiking with her, cooked for her, or drove into town to get her tampons and Advil. But Steve did those things for her.

She had to talk with Steve about what they were doing, hadn't she? God, she was terrible when it came to feelings! There was a reason why she hadn't been in a real relationship for years. Did she want to be in one with Steve? Did she want him to be her boyfriend? Could they make a long distance relationship work? See each other every other weekend? They lived only 100 miles away from each other- that was doable, right? She knew that he wanted to stay here and not move back to New York and she couldn't ask him to do that. And she didn't want to live here for good. She was a city girl. What were they gonna do?

She wrote Fury back that she would be staying in upstate New York until she was done with the book. No one really knew about Steve, but Natasha was sure that Laura, her best friend's wife, knew that Natasha was seeing someone here. She emptied her coffee mug and got to editing her latest chapter. It took her longer than she had planned and Steve was already back from his shopping trip when she done with the chapter.

"Hi." He kissed the top of her head. "How's it going?"

"Slower than I thought." She looked up at him. "Did you get everything you needed?"

He smiled. "Yeah, I did." He leaned down to kiss her. She loved kissing him. His lips were so soft and he always kissed her like she was the only thing in the world that mattered to him. She did wonder if he always kissed girls like that or if she was special. "I'll be in my studio to get some work done. I think I have dinner ready by eight. That okay?"

She nodded. "Yup. I see you then."

He kissed her until she was floating on air before he left to get back to his own cabin. She watched him walking down the road with a dreamy smile on her face. God, she had it _bad_ for him.

She was cursing at herself that she hadn't taken any sexy lingerie with her for her stay here, but how had she been supposed to know that she would be spending her nights here with her handsome neighbor?! She sighed while she got into her plain back bra and panties and decided to just wear jeans and a simple sweater. She didn't have to really doll herself up for him and her clothes would be soon on his bedroom floor anyway. Her stomach growled since she hadn't really eaten since breakfast and she was already looking forward to what Steve had made.

She locked her cabin and walked down the road until she arrived at Steve's cabin that was bigger than hers which made sense with him actually living here. He opened the door and let her in after a kiss.

"The lasagna is almost ready. I hope you're hungry! I also made tiramisu."

"Mm, sounds delicious!" She followed him into the living room where his dining table was. He'd decorated the table with candles and he even had cloth napkins. She smiled at him when he pulled out the chair for her and filled her glass with red wine.

"A girl can get used to this."

Steve just smiled at her and left to get into the kitchen. Damn, she had hoped that he would say something like, _I want you to,_ or something like that. But he didn't. She had only been with him for two months, she didn't really know him. Maybe he hooked up regularly with the women who came up here to rent a cabin and she wasn't anything special.

No, she shook her head. Steve wasn't that kind of guy. She knew enough of those guys and he wasn't one of them. She would just have to talk to him about everything.

Steve came back with two plates of steaming lasagna. "Here you go. Be careful, it's still really hot!"

"Thank you. It looks and smells great!" He smiled and sat down across from her. She took a bite and, of course, the food was amazing. This wasn't the first time Steve had made lasagna for her and she knew that it was his mother's recipe. "Delicious as always!"

He told her about his new art project and that he had finished a dresser for a client in Boston over dinner. He titled his head and looked at her. "Is there something on your mind? You've been a bit off today."

It was a good sign that he noticed that, right? She put her fork down. "It's just...I'm almost finished with my novel. It will be soon time for me to return to the city. To go home."

"I'm sure you're happy to see your friends again."

Not the answer she was hoping for. "Yeah. Uh, I've been wondering about what me going back means for us? Is there even an us? Or are we just...Will this end when I go back?"

"Do you want that?"

"What?"

"For this to end when you go back to the city? For me...we are an _us_."

"No, I don't want this to end. I like you." She felt her cheeks getting warm. _Great_. "I like you a lot."

Steve smiled. "I like you too."

"And I want to keep seeing you. If that's okay for you."

He took her hand and laced their fingers together. "That's very okay for me. I want to keep seeing you as well. We can make this work, Nat. We'll enjoy what's left of our team here and then we can visit each other. We're both freelancers. We can make it work. I know I want it to."

She smiled and nodded. "Me, too."

* * *

The next three weeks went by so quickly and by the end of the month she was done with her book. She had spent the last weeks writing and being with Steve and it was time to go home. She had been here for over four months now. She spent one last romantic night with Steve before he carried her stuff to her car and kissed her goodbye, promising to come down the next weekend. She was sad thinking about the fact that they were going from seeing each other every day to only seeing each other from time to time. But she had to learn how to live with that. She'd rather only see him occasionally than not at all. She just had to get used to it.

She had driven half the route when she decided to take a break and eat something. Steve had made her a little care package and when she opened the lunch box, she found a little paper box in it. She smiled and looked inside. Steve had given her a golden necklace with an N as the pendant. God, he was such a sweetheart.

She put the necklace on, grabbed her phone, smiling when she saw the picture of her and Steve as her home screen, and snapped a selfie, sending it to him.

 _thank you, I love it! xoxo_

She ate the pastrami sandwich and continued her drive back to New York. Steve had texted her back by the time she parked her car in the underground carpark.

 _You're welcome! It looks great on you. Can't wait to visit you!_

Asking Laura to look after her place while she was gone had been a great idea. Her plants were still alive and her fridge was even stocked so Natasha didn't have to go grocery shopping. She unpacked her things, looked for a frame for the portrait that Steve had made of her, and called Fury to let him know that she was back in town. He asked her to meet him and her editor Maria Hill tomorrow to talk about the book.

She had a few errands to run, but gladly accepted the invite from the Bartons to come over for dinner. They had talked on the phone and originally wanted to drive up for a weekend trip but never got to it.

She bought a cake at a bakery and knocked on their door at 7 pm. Lila opened it and threw herself into Natasha's arms with Lucky jumping around them. She was greeted warmly by the other Bartons and the dinner was as amazing as always. They exchanged stories about what happened and Natasha shrieked out of happiness when Laura told her that she was pregnant.

The two women were sitting on the couch after the Lila and Cooper went to bed and Clint was in the kitchen doing the dishes.

"I can't believe you let Clint knock you up again!" Natasha grinned at her friend over the rim of her wine glass. She was really happy for her friends and excited to be an aunt again, but she could imagine that three kids were a lot of work. And both Laura and Clint worked full time.

"Well, this is the last one. My dear husband is gonna get a vasectomy." Laura laughed. "Three kids is more than enough."

Natasha wasn't so sure if she wanted to know about Clint and his little swimmers. "Since this is the last kid- I demand that it will be named after me!"

Laura chuckled. "We'll see." Her gaze dropped to her decollete. "I like your necklace. Is it new?"

Natasha's hand went instinctively to her necklace. "Yes. It was a gift."

Her friend smirked. "A gift from whom?"

"Steve." She still hadn't told Laura about him, but it seemed like she was now going to.

"And who's _Steve_?"

Natasha fought the urge to roll her eyes at Laura. "He's my boyfriend. He lives down the road where my cabin was. He's a carpenter and artist."

Laura smiled brightly. "Wow, I can't even remember the last time you called a guy your _boyfriend_. Good for you."

"He's great. I like him a lot." Natasha confessed.

"Do you have a picture? I wanna know what he looks like." Laura asked and Natasha nodded and handed her her phone to show her the photo of her and Steve. "Wow! He looks incredible! What a _man_!" Laura whistled and Natasha laughed. "These kind of guys live upstate?! Wow, just wow! I thought guys with beards and longer hair weren't your type?"

"I think Steve is everyone's type. And he doesn't even realize how handsome and sexy he is, which makes him even more attractive!"

Laura gave her the phone back. "I bet he's incredible in bed!"

"Laura!" Natasha fake-gasped and then laughed.

"What? He is, isn't he?"

Natasha grinned. "He's a gentleman, but he's not a gentle man. Best sex I've ever had! He's really-"

"Why do I always choose the worst moment to step into a room?!" Clint groaned from the door. "I don't wanna hear anything about your sex life, Tasha!"

"Well, I do." Laura objected. "Leave, if you don't wanna know about Natasha's new boyfriend's bedroom performances."

"You got a boyfriend?" Clint raised an eyebrow. "Wow, I think hell just froze over. I thought you didn't do boyfriends."

"She does _do_ Steve." Laura snickered and Natasha rolled her eyes.

* * *

The days until Steve's visit were pretty hectic. She met every day with her editor Maria for several hours and had meetings with the PR department of the publishing house. It felt good that they were in the final steps of her new books being released.

Despite Laura desperately wanting to meet Steve she didn't the weekend he came over. No, they hadn't seen each other for ten days which felt like a life time if you had been used to seeing each other daily and spent most of the time in her apartment. They did leave her place for breakfast and one night for a dinner date, but they mostly stayed in her bed.

She was so excited to tell him about the progress with her book and that Fury wanted to publish it by the end of the year. Steve was happy for her and made her promise him to sign his copy. She didn't tell him that she was thinking about dedicating the book to him. She wouldn't have written it so fast if she hadn't met him, but dedicating a book to someone was a big deal. Laura had bawled her eyes out when she had read the first page where Natasha thanked Laura and Clint for being her family, and even Clint's eyes hadn't been glistening. She didn't want Steve to freak out.

They visited each other as often as possible in the next two months which sadly wasn't very often. Netflix had offered her a consulting position on the show that was based on her novel on top of the work of preparing the release of her newest book. Steve had to finish projects for clients and had to stay upstate to do so. They tried to talk every day on the phone or at least tried to text, but they were both so busy. She was so happy about being so successful in her career, but she wasn't so happy that her love life suffered.

Thanksgiving was around the corner and she wondered if she should invite Steve to join her at the Bartons. She knew that Steve had no family anymore and that his best friend had died in Afghanistan and she had no clue if he had anyone else. She knew that he was friendly with the people who lived in his town, but would they invite him over for Thanksgiving? And her birthday was right after the holiday and she did want to celebrate it with her boyfriend. She could just invite him for her birthday and then casually mention Thanksgiving.

She picked her clothes from the dry cleaner up and called Steve on her way back to her apartment. She didn't have to wait long until he picked up.

"Hi, sweetheart."

Her heart started fluttering at the sound of his voice. "Hi. How are you?"

"I'm good. Just finished the arm chair this morning. I'm really glad that thing is finally done. How are you?"

"Good. I'm gonna be in the New Yorker! They're gonna do an interview with me. With a photo shoot and everything!"

"Wow, that's amazing!"

"Thanks! Look, my birthday is soon-"

"November 22nd, I know. Can I come down to celebrate with you?"

She sighed in relief. "Yes, of course. And Thanksgiving is right before that...Do you already have plans?"

"A few people asked me to come over, but I don't really wanna be the fifth wheel."

"How would you feel about coming with me to the Bartons? Laura is a great cook and everyone is really great." She really hoped that he would say yes or otherwise things could get weird.

"You want me to meet your family?" He didn't sound opposed to the idea. More like he was a little bit surprised, but in a good way. "That's a big step."

"Uh, yeah...You don't have to, but I'd really like you to meet them."

"I'd love to meet them."

"Really?"

"Of course, sweetheart. I think it's time. I'm really looking forward to it. And of course to your birthday."

She was more than relieved that she was going to spend Thanksgiving and her birthday with her boyfriend and she wasn't mad when Steve had to end the call because someone was at his door.

She walked by an art gallery and stopped when she saw something out of the corner of her eye that seemed familiar. A beautiful charcoal drawing of the Brooklyn skyline was on display. She didn't know why but it looked like something that Steve might have drawn. She checked the tag for a name. _Grant Rogers._ She furrowed her eyebrows. Wasn't Grant Steve's middle name? Her eyes widened when she saw the price. The drawing had been offered for _19,180_ $ and it was _sold_. Holy shit!

She had seen enough of Steve's sketches and was sure that he had drawn this piece. She knew that people bought his drawings and the furniture he made looked incredible, but she'd had no idea that he was...That he was some kind of famous artist.

Why hadn't he told her this about him? Didn't he trust her with this? He used his middle name, so she figured that he wanted to separate this from his actual life. He was a humble man, so he probably didn't want people to make a fuss about the fact that people paid a 20 grand just for one picture.

She threw her clean clothes onto her couch and quickly got her laptop out of her bedroom to google _Grant Rogers._ There were no pictures of him and the art scene speculated about who he really was since he never showed up to his own exhibits and didn't give any interviews. His pieces were very popular and got sold for a lot of money. She did know that Steve made his furniture under his real name and when she googled Steve Rogers, she found his homepage where clients could contact him. And she found a few articles about his time in the army. He barely talked about it and she didn't want to pressure him. She couldn't even image what he had experienced overseas. She read the articles and Steve was pretty much a _war hero_. He'd saved his unit from an attack by the Taliban. She googled Bucky Barnes, but didn't find anything. Bucky was probably just a nickname.

She leaned back against her chair and looked out of the window. She had told Steve so much about her which was more than unusual for her, and didn't know much about Steve. She'd had no idea that he had a secret life as a famous artist and that he'd had been awarded with the Bronze Star medal and the Purple Heart which meant that he had been _hurt_ in combat. Which she also didn't know about. She had seen a few scars on his body, but he'd never said how he gotten them.

Did he simply not want to talk about those things or did he not trust her enough? Or care enough for her to tell her about it?

* * *

She decided that she wanted to talk with Steve about it in person and not on the phone. She just hoped that he would explain everything and that she wouldn't be without a boyfriend on her birthday. Her book was going to be published two weeks before Christmas to get some "holiday money" according to Fury and she would be busy all of December, so she had to do it over Thanksgiving and her birthday. And she didn't think she could wait that long to ask him why he didn't tell her that he was an famous artist and a war hero.

A fucking hurricane ruined their plans to see each other because it was just too dangerous for Steve to drive and no trains were leaving the train station. Natasha couldn't even get to the Bartons on Thanksgiving because it was too dangerous to set a foot outside. So she was sitting alone on Thanksgiving in front of her TV with a pizza, praying that her windows wouldn't burst. Steve let her know via text that his town had a power outage when he wished her a happy thanksgiving.

She postponed her birthday part to next week and only had breakfast with the Bartons during the two hour break where it wasn't raining like it was the end of the world. She had gotten beautiful leather boots from Clint and Laura, and Cooper and Lila had given her a self-made frame so that she could frame the cover of her new novel.

She had already put her new boots in her closet and was currently looking for the right place for the frame when she heard a knock. She thought it was outside, that something was getting knocked against the wall by the storm, but then she heard the knock again. Yeah, that was her door. She put the frame on her couch table and walked to the door. Who was that? One of the neighbors?

She opened the door and came face to face with a soaked Steve. His hair, beard and clothes were completely wet. "Steve?"

"I couldn't miss your birthday! Happy Birthday, sweetheart!" He smiled at her and she almost swooned which was not like her at all!

"What are you- how did you get here?" She asked confused.

"I drove. Wouldn't recommend it, but I made it. I had to park the car a block from here, that's why I'm so wet."

"Come inside. It's warm and dry in here." She helped him out of his wet jacket and he followed her into the bathroom. "Just take off your clothes-"

"Wow, that was quick." He grinned and she rolled her eyes. "I thought you'd wanted at least to see your present before we'll have birthday sex."

"I was gonna offer you some towels to dry off and I think you left some clothes here but if you'd rather stay in your wet ones..."

"I got clothes in my duffel bag, but some towels would be nice. It really feels like it's the end of the world outside."

"I know. Wait here, I get you the towels." She left to go to her linen closet and came back with the promised towels. Steve had already shred his wet clothes off and she was reminded again that he had a great body. She wasn't really superficial, but his body was smoking hot. Steve noticed her staring at him with a grin on his face, but she was ignoring that. She wasn't going to sleep with him until she had talked with him about what she had found out about him. They were in a relationship, why wasn't he talking with her about his past and his double life?

He was toweling himself off when she left the bathroom, and joined her in the living room in jeans and a simple white shirt. He sat down next to her on the couch and handed her a gift box. "Happy Birthday." He whispered softly and leaned forward to kiss her. She kissed him back and almost forgot that she had to talk to him. "I hope you like the gift."

She opened the box and was looking at a vintage ballerina music box. It was high quality and couldn't have been cheap. At least now she knew that she wouldn't have to feel guilty about him spending too much money on her since he was apparently loaded. She opened it and the finale andante of Swan Lake filled the room. It was the perfect gift. Her ballet days were long over but she still loved it so much.

"Thank you." She breathed out and looked up at him. "I love it."

He smiled. "I'm glad. But that's not all. Take another look." She looked at the bottom of the box and there was a pair of small diamond hoops. "I saw them and thought that you'd like them. Don't worry about the price. I can afford it. I won't have to eat dry bread for the rest of the year."

 _I know. "_ Thank you. They are beautiful." She placed the music box next to the frame on her coffee table. "Did you buy that with the money from the Brooklyn skyline drawing, Grant Rogers?"

Steve's smile disappeared from his face. "How did you- I was gonna tell you, I swear!"

"When?"

"Today actually. I told you I was an artist, I just didn't tell you how successful I am. Look...it's kind of embarrassing that people pay so much money for my art. I've never done it for the money and I don't like the fancy art scene at all. I just wanna create something. I don't wanna hang out at art galleries with people who think they are better than anyone else just because they think they can correctly interpret every artist's work. I like being just Steve, I don't want people to treat me differently and I definitely don't want the wrong kind of people to be interested in me. I'm sorry that it took me so long to tell you about that, Nat."

She believed him. He looked guilty that he'd kept it from her and he really didn't seem like the type of guy who wanted that kind of attention. "I googled you after I recognized your sketch. I read the articles about your time in the Army. Why didn't you tell me that you have the Bronze Star and Purple Heart."

Steve clenched his jaw and she was worried that she angered him. He sighed and took her hand. It almost looked like he needed human contact in that moment. "I didn't want you to know. I didn't want to talk about that. I was treated like some war hero, but I'm not. Yes, I got my unit out of there. I felt good." He shook his head. "I really felt like a hero. And then two weeks later I sent my best friend to his death."

"Steve-"

He held his hand up. "Believe me, whatever you want to say- I already heard it. But it _was_ my fault. The intel wasn't much and Bucky advised me to not send him and a small team to track down a hidden place of the Taliban. I disagreed and sent them anyway. They walked straight into a trap. Bucky..." He gulped and she pulled him into his arms. "Bucky was the only one who didn't make it back to the base. We found his body five days later. He told me that it was a bad idea but I felt invisible and didn't listen to him."

"I am so sorry for what happened to your friend." She didn't know what else to say. Was there even anything to say? It hadn't been his fault, but she knew that he would never believe that.

"I'm sorry that I kept all of this from you. I just..." She heard him sniffing and then he pulled away from her embrace to look at her. His eyes were wet but he was smiling a little. "I'm sorry I ruined your birthday."

She shook her head. "You didn't ruin anything."

"I don't like to talk about what happened to Bucky. But I also know that he would want me to live my life. To move on and to try to be happy. And you...you make me so damn happy, Natasha. I've been thinking about us in the last weeks and this long distance thing...it's not gonna work in the long run." Was he really gonna break up with her on her fucking _birthday_?! After telling her all of this and then saying that she made him happy? _Seriously_?!

She opened her mouth, but he kept talking. "I'm gonna move back to Brooklyn." _What?_ "I can't hide in my cabin for the rest of my life. It's time to come home. And I wanna be closer to you. I want to be able to pick you up for a date without driving through half the state."

"Are you doing this for you? Or for me?" She didn't want him to move back to New York _just_ for her. That would put too much pressure on her.

"For me. It's time. Brooklyn is my home. And yes, also for us. You made me realize that I want more for my life. You helped me get to the point where I'm ready to take this step."

She blinked her tears away. "I'm really happy that you're moving to New York. It sucks to only see you every other week."

He cupped her face with his hands. "I know. I missed you so much, sweetheart." He kissed her softly. "I can't wait for us to live in the same city."

She smiled. "Me, too." Now _that_ was the best birthday gift she had ever received.


	77. My OTP is canon, bitch!

_Darcy Lewis starts working at the Avengers compound and begins to ship Romanogers._

* * *

After years of watering Jane and making sure that she stayed alive, it had been time for Darcy to move on. She loved Janey like a sister, but let's be honest, she still didn't really know a thing about Jane's work.

So Darcy had decided to apply for the job as Maria Hill's assistant when Jane had told her that she was looking for one. Saying goodbye to Jane and Eric hadn't been easy, but she knew that she had made the right decision -she couldn't be an intern for the rest of her life.

And being Hill's assistant was a _great_ job. Hill had a no bullshit attitude, but she was a nice boss and Darcy thought they got along quite nicely, and she even made her boss laugh from time to time.

And living at the compound was just fucking amazing! She had her own little apartment with fancy furniture, and the best thing was that Darcy was actually being _paid_. Jane had given her money when she could, but having an actual salary was more than nice. She bought a new wardrobe since she was now the assistant of a boss ass bitch, and she could even start putting money to the side for a nice vacation next summer. Life was good. Really good. She had a new job and was surrounded by hot superheros all day long. What more could a girl want?

What Darcy didn't like so much were the regular training exercises for _all_ employers. Why the fuck did _she_ have to run four miles through the fucking forest? She wasn't on the superhero team! She was just responsible for keeping Hill updated on everything!

And it also didn't help her ego that Hill and Romanoff didn't even have one little drop of sweat on their perfect faces. No, they looked like they just came from a nice stroll through a park where birds had been sitting on their fingers singing with them.

The only good thing about this torture was that she got to ogle Captain America's buns of freedom. And of course the other Avengers. Barnes, Wilson and Rhodey were fine as hell. And Maximoff and Romanoff looked like freaking models. Working here could give a normal girl some kind of complex. Really, did you only get onto the team if you looked like you belonged on the cover of Vogue or GQ?!

Wanda smirked at her and Darcy briefly wondered if the girl was reading her mind. But she was almost glad that she was also panting like Darcy herself. Good to know that not everyone was in top shape.

Back at the compound, Darcy emptied her water bottle in one big gulp and flopped down on the bench outside the gym. Captain Perfect came over to her with a kind smile on his face. Not that she had any chances with a guy like him, but she didn't feel particular good about the fact that she looked like a sweaty tomato right now.

"Good job, Lewis. But you need to work more on your cardio. The compound could get attack at any moment and you need to be able to run for your life."

She grimaced. The dude had a point, but she'd rather spend her evenings watching Netflix than running on a treadmill. And good sports bras were so expensive when you were a girl with big boobs.

"Uh-huh, yeah."

Cap looked like he was about to say something, but Romanoff walked past by them and he just stared at her. Hell, Darcy couldn't stop staring as well. The redhead pulled her tank top over her head and was only left in her tight yoga pants and a sports bra that made her girls look very good. Where did Black Widow buy her sports bras?! They were probably too expensive for Darcy anyway.

She looked back at Cap whose eyes were glued to Romanoff's ass. Holy shit! She didn't think she had ever seen him do something like that before. Sooner or later every guy's eyes wandered to Darcy's chest, but no, Steve Rogers always looked into her eyes. Okay, Thor also never looked at her boobs, but he didn't count. Romanoff looked over her shoulder and smirked at Cap who quickly looked away, turning pink.

 _Interesting._

* * *

Hill and Romanoff were in Europe helping Fury with something and Darcy hoped that her boss would ask Fury if he knew whatever happened to her iPod. It had been years and she still hadn't gotten it back!

Things were quiet at the compound and the Avengers didn't need to assemble. Darcy used Hill's absence to organize her paperwork and to establish some kind of system, even though Hill was kind of messy. But it was nothing that Darcy couldn't handle.

Darcy had tried to find out if Rogers and Romanoff were a thing, but she didn't find anything. There was nothing online and the compound wasn't exactly a rumor mill. She had befriended Wanda a little bit, but didn't ask her. She didn't want her to think that she was only friends with her because she wanted hot gossip on the Avengers. Not that Darcy could do anything with it, they all had to sign NDAs before they started to work here.

She had barely seen Cap and Widow together before Romanoff's departure for Europe, so she couldn't really see for herself if these two were a thing. But she did notice that Rogers was a bit mopey since the redhead was gone. Did he miss his girlfriend?! Darcy knew that it was none of her business, but she had always been nosy. And what was more interesting than the love life of superheros?!

She was done with filing the mission reports from last year and decided to call it a day. It was almost midnight and Darcy could hear her bed calling. She left the office wing and decided to drop by the common kitchen for a midnight snack before she would go to bed. She had her own kitchenette in her apartment, but her fridge was empty. And why should she buy groceries, if she could get food for _free_?

She walked through the glass corridor and turned around the corner from where she could look directly into the kitchen thanks another glass wall. Really, Tony Stark had a thing for glass. Was it some voyeurism kink?!

She stopped walking when she saw that someone was in the kitchen. Cap was filling hot water into a mug.

Couldn't he sleep and needed some tea? Should she just join him or wait until he was out of the kitchen? They lived under the same roof, but they weren't exactly friends or anything like that.

Rogers walked to the sitting area in the kitchen and Darcy only noticed now Romanoff sitting there. He handed her the mug and she smiled at him. It was a smile that she had never seen on the woman's face before. Rogers sat down opposite from her and they both sat there in silence. Romanoff was sipping on her tea and Cap was just watching her with a fond look on his face. He almost looked like he was in _love_.

Darcy smiled to herself and decided to go to bed. She just hoped that she still had a granola bar somewhere in her apartment.

* * *

A few days had passed since she saw Rogers and Romanoff in the kitchen, pretty much having a midnight date, and she hadn't seen either of them since. They were busy people and Darcy was busy herself. Turning the Avengers Initiative into its own agency was a fuckton of paperwork and Darcy was the lucky one to fill out the majority. She felt pretty cool having access to the sensible data of the organization, but bureaucracy was just another word for torture. If she was going to hear that fucking jingle again because the Pentagon had put her on hold again..They were going to have to put her into a holding cell because she going to turn into the Hulk!

She decided that a break was in order and totted towards the common kitchen. She was mad at herself for wearing heels, but Hill looked so badass in hers and Darcy thought it was time that she dressed more like a grown up. She filled a mug with coffee once she was in the kitchen and her eyes lit up when she saw that the giant glass bowl with candy was refilled. She had the sneaking suspicion that Barnes and Wilson were the ones who were pretty much inhaling that stuff.

Thank Thor that she was wearing a dress with pockets today! She stuffed those with candy until they were brim-full.

"I see you got to the candy before Rhodey did."

Feeling like a kid caught with their hand in the cookie jar, she turned around and came face to face with Captain America. "Uh...Wait, _Rhodey_ is the one who steals all the candy?!"

He chuckled. "It's always the ones you least expect. Don't worry, take as much as you like."

"Thanks." She knew she was blushing. Damn, she wanted to be cool around here!

He got a mug out of the cupboard and went for the coffee. "You've been here for three, four months?" He turned around and she nodded. "And you like it so far?"

"Yeah, it's a great job. I loved working with Jane, but it was time for something new."

"Jane Foster, right? Thor talked about her a lot."

"Have you heard from him?"

Rogers shook his head. "No. I guess you didn't either, huh? I'm sure he's fine, though."

Could she just ask him about him and Romanoff? Or would that be overstepping some line? She didn't work for him, but that didn't mean that he wasn't her boss. But she wanted so desperately to know what was going on between the two Avengers! And she would never ever ask the Black Widow that. No, she valued her life too much for that.

"Are you going to Tony's party on Friday?" Cap asked her, interrupting her train of thoughts. "I know he said only team members, but you're welcome to come."

She had heard that Stark and Pepper Potts were going to spend the weekend here and trowing a little party, but it was supposed to be a private gathering. But free food and drinks? Count her in!

"Yeah, sure. Are you going with Natasha? She's your girlfriend, right?" She blurted out and Rogers almost choked on his coffee. Great, so much for being subtle. Argh, she hoped that the Black Widow wasn't going to kill her in her sleep tonight. Darcy hadn't even hit 30 yet, she was too young to die!

"What?! She's not my girlfriend!"

"Ah, friends with benefits! Gotcha!"

"What, no!" He almost seemed offended that she would think he would be into that. Huh, so he was still old fashioned.

"So, you two are not banging?"

Great, now she had completely lost her filter! Jane hadn't paid much attention to that because she was too busy with science, but she wasn't so sure about Captain America. Would she get fired? Was she somehow committing treason right now?!

"Who's not banging?" A voice asked behind her and Darcy froze. Oh God, she was going to die.

Natasha Romanoff was standing behind her and she knew that she was toast now. Romanoff was going to kill her and then her and Rogers were going to make out or something. She was positive that Rogers was the kind of guy who was into women who could kill you with their pinky.

"No one." Rogers quickly answered and gave Darcy a sharp look. "Have you looked at the file I dropped off on your desk?"

"About Parker? Yeah, I have." Romanoff nodded and grabbed an apple from the fruit basket on the kitchen counter. Her gaze wandered from Darcy to Rogers. "Did I interrupt something?"

"No."

"No." Darcy repeated. "I should get back to work. Uh, bye."

"Hey, what about her?" She heard Natasha asking while she exited the kitchen. That was close! One of these days her mouth would get her into big trouble! She just hoped that Cap wasn't too disappointed in her. Disappointing him was like disappointing a cute puppy.

"Shut up." Rogers groaned in the background. "We've been over this a million times! I don't wanna date!"

 _Yeah, because you wanna date your friend Natasha!_ She really hoped that she didn't just say that out loud.

She slept with one eye open that night.

* * *

Darcy found a dress in the back of her closet that was semi fancy enough to wear it to a party by Tony Stark. She had heard that other employees besides the Avengers would come and she was relieved. She just felt better if some normal people were there. And she could better hide from Romanoff in a larger crowd. The woman always seemed to watch her ever since that incident in the kitchen. Had she heard the whole thing and was just waiting for the right moment to strike? Should she make a will, so her parents and Janey would get everything? Not that she owned a lot.

A lot of people were already there when Darcy arrived. She had to give it to Stark, he knew how to throw a party. The common area was turned into a club with waiters running around, offering snacks and drinks. If this was a small gathering- what did Iron Man do for a big party? It really looked like one of those fancies clubs where Darcy couldn't afford the admission. Working for the Avengers had been a great idea!

She grabbed a martini and some appetizers from a tablet when a waiter walked past by her and took in the scene before her. The Avengers were already here and a few of the other employers.

Wanda was talking to Pepper Potts, and Stark was sitting on leather couch, talking to Rhodey.

Wilson and Barnes were playing billiard, and Romanoff and Rogers were...Where were they? She had just seen them...

She looked around and found them at the bar. Romanoff was mixing drinks and Cap was looking at her every move. He was basically enchanted by her, she didn't think that he would notice anything else right now besides the woman before him.

It was kind of cute. It looked like she was teasing him or telling a dirty joke because the dude was blushing. Romanoff looked delighted by it to no end and threw her head back in laughter. Rogers looked up at her and _woah_ , he looked like every dude who was looking at his one true love in those romance novels.

He accepted the drink with a smile and Widow watched him while he took a sip. He nodded at her and she smiled. Again, it was the smile Darcy had only ever seen the woman use for Cap.

Darcy didn't know a lot of things, but she did know that those two were in love with each other. God, they were perfect together! Why weren't they together yet? And married with lots of cute babies? Okay, that was a bit too much even for her. She shook her head and decided to say hello to the people she was friendly with.

She talked to a guy from STRIKE who was more interested in her boobs than her eyes and so he didn't notice her watching CapWidow. Stevenat? Romanogers? Shouldn't these two have a name like TomKat or Brangelina? Both couples were long history, so maybe they weren't the best example. Romanoff was trying to get Rogers to dance and actually succeeded. _Wow_.

Cap seemed really uncomfortable, but Romanoff was helping him and soon they were both moving effortlessly to the music.

God, they both looked so good, it was unfair! They looked they were shooting some commercial for a sexy new fragrance. Natasha wore a tight top and leather pants, and Steve was wearing a nice black button down and black jeans. Darcy was pretty sure that Natasha had chosen that outfit for him. The redhead turned around in his arms and his hands landed on her waist while they moved to the beat. If they didn't hook up tonight, Darcy was gonna lose her mind!

"You wanna get out of here?"

She looked back at the guy standing in front of her. "No." She gave him a fake smile and decided to see what food was available today. She was kind of hoping for caviar and lobster, or some fancy shit like that. That was the least she could expect from a billionaire, right? She decided to try the canapes with truffles and _gold._ The gold tasted like nothing, though, why the fuck was is on the canapes?!

She talked with a few nurses of Dr. Cho's team and one mentioned that Captain Perfect had been glued to Romanoff's bedside when she had been hurt before Darcy moved to the compound. Apparently she had been unconscious for two days and Rogers hadn't once left her side. God, that was soo sweet! Why weren't they a couple?!

The nurses suddenly excused themselves and Darcy was sitting alone on the couch near the dance floor. She looked over, but Romanogers was nowhere to be seen. Oh, did they leave to hook up? _Niiice_.

"Darcy, hello." Romanoff was suddenly standing in front of her. She pointed at the couch. "May I?"

"Uh, sure." Oh God, was she going to kill her now? With all those witnesses?

"We haven't really talked yet." She sat down next to her. "Do you like it here?"

"Yes, a lot!

"Good, that's good. Listen, I don't wanna make you uncomfortable or anything, but do you have a boyfriend? Are you seeing anyone at the moment?"

Okay, that was not the direction Darcy thought this conversation would go. "Um, no. _Why_?"

She smiled a little, but Darcy didn't know if it was sincere. "I've noticed you watching Steve. Would you like to go out with him?"

" _What_?!"

"If you wanna get to know him better, I can arrange that. He needs a girlfriend. Not that he would ever admit that. So, do you wanna go on a date with him?"

What the fuck was happening right now? Why the fuck was the Black Widow asking her if she wanted to go on a date with Captain America? What was going on? Did Romanoff not see that her and Steve were perfect for each other? Did she not realize that he was in love with her? Why the fuck did she want to set him up with Darcy? Darcy didn't want to go out with him. No, she wanted him to go out with the woman he loved- _Natasha_. The guy deserved some happiness and Natasha did too.

"Um, no thanks. He's not my type."

Romanoff's eyes widened. "He's not your type? He's everyone's type!"

"Is he yours?" Darcy couldn't help but asked.

"This isn't about me."

She tried to hide her smirk. Natasha didn't say that he _wasn't_ her type. "I don't wanna go out with him. If you want him to have a girlfriend so badly, why don't you just go out with him?"

She looked briefly hurt, but the expression vanished as soon as Darcy spotted it. "Fine, then don't go out with the perfect guy." She stood up. "You just made a mistake."

"I think you're making one." She blurted out and Natasha seemed surprised, then shook her head and left.

She later saw Cap trying to talk to Romanoff, but she shook him off and left the party. Steve looked like a kicked puppy and Darcy felt like the whole thing was her fault . She just wanted her new ship to be canon!

* * *

It was weeks after the party when Darcy was in alone in Hill's office and all hell broke lose. One minute she was typing in a handwritten report from Fury and the next minute the alarm went off, informing her that the compound was under attack. She tried to ask FRIDAY what was going on, but it appeared that the AI was offline which couldn't mean anything good.

God, why hadn't they allowed her to carry her taser? She dived under Hill's desk and found the gun that was strapped underneath the table. She had gotten some training and knew how to use it, but she was still not entirely comfortable with having a gun in her hands. She knew that she was supposed to wait right where she was until she had more information, but hadn't Captain America himself told her that she should be able to run when they were under attack? Darcy took a deep breath, prayed to Thor that he would look over her, and left the office.

She heard gunshots and noise from the other side of the building, but the office wing seemed to be clear at the moment. Okay, where to go now? She was definitely not going towards the noise. Nope. She would try to leave the building and then see what to do when she was outside. She was sure that the Avengers and the op teams were handling the situation.

She turned around the corner and someone pulled her into their arms and covered her mouth with their hand before she could scream. The hand was pretty small and she pretty sure that she felt breasts press into her back.

"Shh, it's me." She recognized the voice as Romanoff's. "Can I let go or are you gonna scream and compromise our location?"

She tried to talk, but Natasha's hand was still on her mouth. She let go. "What's happening?" She whispered after she turned around to face her companion.

"Hydra got somehow in. FRIDAY's down. I've come to check the wing because we store valuable intel here. Did you see anyone?"

She shook her head. "No, you're the first person here."

"Good." She looked around. "I need you to go back into Hill's office to secure our data. Just boot her compute and type in-" She pushed a piece of paper into her hand. "This in. It will lock down our servers and no one will have access. I'll wait here and stand guard."

She blinked at Natasha, but then nodded. She had to get her act together. "Okay." She walked back into Hill's office to do as Natasha had told her. She almost laughed at the code, but she was currently too scared for any kind of humor. She typed the code in and the computer immediately shut down.

She sighed in relief and went out of the room when gunshots were suddenly everywhere around her. Natasha pushed her back into the room and followed her shortly after. She locked the door and turned around to look at her. "Are you carrying?"

"Uh, yeah. I found this gun underneath Hill's desk." She held the gun up.

"Good. This door won't hold them off for long." Natasha said calmly while Darcy was losing her freaking mind. "Help me move the table so we can hide behind it." She snapped out of her fear and helped her. "I know you're scared, but I'm here with you, okay? I've been in worse situations before. You're gonna be okay. Don't worry." Natasha squeezed her hand which surprised Darcy more than anything. "I want you to start shooting as soon as this door opens, okay?"

Darcy nodded and released the safety switch of her pistol. "I can do that."

Natasha smiled. "Good. Don't think, just shoot."

Seconds later the door burst open and Darcy did what Natasha had told her to. She didn't think that she actually hit anyone, but it was enough to distract the HYDRA agents so Natasha could take them down. One by one went to the ground.

"Good job, Lewis." Natasha patted her shoulder and then walked over to check on the bad guys.

"Thank you." She breathed out and came out of their hiding spot. "I don't think I would survived this without you."

"You're a tough cookie, you would have found a way."

This was probably not the right time, but Darcy was grinning like a fool because of the compliment. The _Black Widow_ thought that she was a tough cookie!

"Miss Romanoff? All intruders are arrested or have been killed." FRIDAY announced and Darcy was really glad to hear her voice. "All systems are back online."

"Good. Thank you, FRIDAY. Any casualties on our side?" Natasha put her Glock back into her thigh holster.

"Captain Rogers has been shot and-" Natasha was already running out of the room. "He's currently in the infirmary."

Not knowing what to do, Darcy just followed Natasha. She wanted to know how Cap was as well. Jesus, the Black Widow was fast! Did everyone know that she was almost as fast as Rogers and Barnes?!

Natasha was already by Cap's side when Darcy reached the infirmary, completely out of breath. Okay, maybe she did have to work on her cardio.

Rogers's pants were cut open on his right leg and Darcy saw a bullet wound. And she spotted another one in his left shoulder.

"What happened?" Natasha almost hissed while pushing a strain of hair from his forehead. Huh, that was strangely intimate.

"Someone managed to get a hit on the punk while he was fighting someone else." A male voice said behind her and Barnes came into the room. "Shit happens, Nat."

"Why do you have that goddamn shield if you're not using it?" Her voice was now sounding softer.

Cap cupped her cheek with one hand and looked at her sheepishly. _What_ was happening?! "Sorry, sweetheart. I'll make it up to you, I promise." He whispered and pulled her down for a kiss.

Oh God! Oh God! "Yes!" Darcy squealed and threw her fist into the air. "My OTP is canon, bitch!"

Natasha and Steve stopped kissing to look at her. Barnes was eyeing her as well. "Your what is what now?"

She waved him off. "Shush, you're ruining this for me!"


	78. Goose

A/N: I had this and a few other one shots already drafted before I decided to take a creative break. So there could be a few one shots popping up even though I'm on hiatus.

 _Steve is pretty sure that Natasha is messing with him when she claims that she cat-sits for Fury._

* * *

Steve knew that he wasn't really an expert when it came to the opposite sex. Before the serum no one, aside from Peggy, looked at him twice and after the serum too many women wanted him, and he knew they just wanted him because of his new looks. So due to his lack of experience, he had no idea what was going on between him and Natasha. He knew that people were talking about them at the Triskelion, that they thought that he and Nat were a thing.

He liked Natasha. He really did. She was his first real friend here and he could see why Fury partnered them up. They couldn't be more different, but they worked very well together. He trusted her and spending time with her was his favorite thing. They spent more and more time outside of work together and he just loved being in her company. She'd warmed up to him and showed him her real self. Beneath that cool and cold front was a dorky and witty woman. She loved to read and was a big Disney nerd, and they often watched the movies together.

Steve would be lying if he hadn't thought about Nat being more than just his friend. She made him happy in a way that anyone hadn't been able to in a long time. She made him laugh and he felt like he was just _Steve_ to her, and not _Captain America_.

And he kind of felt that the time they spent together were kind of like dates. Not that he'd ever been on a real one. He had to shudder when he thought about his double dates with Buck.

Maybe he should grow a pair and just ask Nat out. He sometimes thought that she maybe wanted to be more than friends as well. He'd noticed that she looked at him differently than at anyone else. So maybe there was hope.

He got off his couch with a big sigh to get his phone. He was just gonna text her to see if she was free tonight and then go from there. He would just be casual, ease them both into this.

He found his phone in his leather jacket and opened his conversation with Natasha.

 _Hey:) Are you free tonight? Have dinner and see a movie?_

He reread his text and pressed send. It was casual, but it kinda implied that it could also be a date. They usually met at one of their places to see a movie and eat take out. He hoped that she would pick up what he was implying. His phone pinged with a text message. He opened it and his face fell.

 _I can't:(_

Shit. Did she really already have plans or did she _knew_ and was letting him down? He was thinking about a reply when his phone chimed again.

 _I'm cat-sitting for Fury._

He read the text again. Was she messing with him? Was she making fun of him? If she didn't want to spend time with him, she could just tell him. He was a grown man, he could take her rejection.

 _I'm pretty sure that Fury doesn't have a cat! Just say that you don't want to see me tonight._

Her replay came almost immediately.

 _Don't be a sourpuss!_

What was that supposed to mean? He wanted to lock his screen, but she'd sent him photo. He opened it and was looking at a selfie of Natasha who was making a sad face and had a freaking _cat_ in her arms.

 _You could come over and spend the evening with me and Goose...if you want. We're both two very nice girls;)_

Fury had a cat. A cat named Goose. Or was that cat Natasha's and she was messing with him? Natasha texted him an address that he didn't know and he wondered if it was Fury's.

* * *

He parked his Harley in front of a nice house in a suburb of DC. It wasn't a mansion, but it was still a very nice looking house. Did Fury really live here? He hadn't pictured Fury as suburbs kinda guy.

He walked up to the front door and rang the bell. The door opened and Natasha was standing in front of him. She was wearing leggings and a hoodie that looked a lot like the one he'd been looking for for weeks.

"Hi!" She smiled at him. "I'm happy you decided to come!"

"Uh, hi. Does Fury really live here?"

She laughed. "You really don't believe me, do you? Yes, he does. And he really has cat."

She stepped aside and he walked into the house. It really was a nice house; Steve could picture himself living in a place like this one day as well. He followed Natasha through the hallway into the living room.

The cat from the selfie was sitting on the floor and looking up at him. "This is Goose, Steve. Goose, this is Steve."

He waved at the cat, not really knowing how to greet one, and the cat just blinked twice at him before she walked over to Natasha and rubbed herself against her legs. "She prefers women. And Nick. They're bffs."

"Okay." He'd learned more about Fury in the last five minutes than he'd had in the last 18 months.

"Come, sit down." She pointed at the couch. "I made popcorn. I'll get it and then we can watch a movie." She grinned a little. "I feel like a teenage girl who's babysitting and a cute boy came by to keep her company." She thought that he was _cute_? That was a good sign, right? "I'll be right back."

He nodded and used Nat's absence to let his gaze wander. Fury's living room looked pretty normal, but then again Steve had no idea what he'd expected. There was a fire place with a basket with firewood next to it. A few framed photos were on the mantel. One showed Natasha and Clint with Fury, and he didn't recognize the two women with Fury in another photo. One was blonde and the other had short black hair and they were both posing with Fury. And his cat was also there! Fury looked younger in that picture... _How_ old was Goose?

Said cat was now sitting in front of the fireplace. Huh, where did the basket with the firewood go? He could have sworn there had been one just a minute ago!

Natasha came back in that moment with a big bowl of popcorn in her arms. "You've already decided what movie you wanna see?"

"Uh..." He looked at Goose. "Aristocats?"

She laughed, grabbing the remote from the coffee table. "Good choice!" She turned on the TV and started the movie after she found it on Netflix. She dug her hand into the popcorn bowl and threw some of it towards Goose.

"Are you sure it's okay that she eats that?"

Natasha looked amused. "Believe me, her stomach can take it."

"Okay." He watched the cat eat the popcorn before he focused on the movie. He looked for Goose after some time, but she wasn't sitting by the fireplace anymore. He did a double table, but the basket was back. What the hell?

Together they emptied the bowl of popcorn pretty fast and Natasha put the empty bowl onto the coffee table. They were halfway through the movie when Natasha suddenly pulled his arm over her shoulder and snuggled into his side. His breathing stopped for a minute, she'd never done this before.

"Okay?" She whispered, eyes on the screen.

"Yes."

She didn't say more, but she snuggled closer and he felt brave enough to rub his hand up and down her arm. He was pretty sure he went to heaven. His gaze flickered between the TV and Nat and he couldn't stop thinking about how good and natural this felt. He sure hoped she felt like this too. He looked from her to the TV, but his gaze stopped at the coffee table. The bowl was _gone_. Neither he or Nat had gotten up to bring it into the kitchen. What was happening?

He saw Goose's tail moving behind the coffee table and watched her walk out of the living room. Was his mind playing tricks with him? He shook his head and just focused on Natasha being so close to him.

The movie ended eventually and Natasha turned the TV off. She left his embrace and sat up to face him. "I think it's tradition that the boy kisses the babysitter when he visits her."

"Yeah?"

She nodded seriously, but her eyes were sparkling at him. "Yeah. It's like an American law."

"Well, in that case..." He cupped her face and leaned in closer. "Are you sure?" He asked because he had to know. He had to hear from her that this was really happening and things were changing between them.

"Yes." She whispered softly. "Kiss me, Steve."

His heart skipped a few beats at her words and he pressed his lips against hers. The kiss was soft and almost chaste, but it was perfect. Nat's eyes were still closed when he pulled away, resting his forehead against hers.

"Kiss me again." She whispered and since he was a good soldier, he gladly followed her order. They kissed longer this time and even a little lip nibbling and tongue were involved.

The cat meowed and jumped onto Natasha's lap. She laughed and her cheeks were a bit flushed and her lips swollen from them kissing. "Looks like someone needs attention." She patted Goose's head and Steve's gaze briefly flickered to the coffee table. He did a double take. The bowl was back. What the hell?

"So-" He looked back at Natasha. "Do you want to go out with me?"

He smiled. "Are you asking me out on a _date_?"

"I think I am. Yeah."

"I'd love to go on a date with you."

Natasha beamed and he hadn't felt this great and happy in...God, in forever. She shooed Goose off her lap and cupped his neck to kiss him again.

He'd never thought that he would have his first kiss with Natasha in Nick Fury's house, but he couldn't really care about that. Not when he was finally kissing her and would soon go on a real date with her.

* * *

"Hey, Goose!"

Fury walked into his house, happy to be finally home again. He loved his job, but he hated kissing the asses of politicians who frankly had no motherfucking clue about his work.

Goose padded towards him and the sound of her little paws hitting the hardwood floor always made him smile. He knew what she really was, but she was still the cutest motherfucker in all of DC, possibly the whole universe. "Has Natasha been good to you?"

He bent down to scratch Goose's head while she rubbed her body against his legs. "Yeah, I missed you, too." He walked into his kitchen with Goose in tow.

"So I heard that Rogers was here?" He wasn't sure what to think about that. Not about Rogers being in his house. He knew that he could trust the man. He didn't know what to think about _Natasha_ inviting him over. He was old, but not too old, he knew what that meant. He made a face at Goose. "Did they make out? In my house?"

She looked up at him and then spit something out. Almost twenty years and it still freaked him out a little bit. He took a closer look. Goose had spit out sunglasses. They looked _a lot_ like the ones Rogers was often wearing.

He grinned at Goose. "Good kitty!"


	79. Dear Steve (AU)

_AU Lila writes letters to Captain Rogers because of a school project and wants him to meet her aunt._

* * *

Spring 2016

 _Hello Captain Rogers:)_

 _my name is Lila Barton and I am ten years old and I live with my family in Queens, New York. My dad is a veterinarian, his subject are birds of prey, and my mom is a teacher. I have two brothers named Cooper, who is 13, and Nate, who is four. And we have a dog named Lucky and he's the cutest dog in the whole wide world! My favorite show is Dog Cops that I always watch with my daddy. My favorite person is my Auntie Nat! She's the coolest person I know. She's super funny and pretty! She was an actual ballerina and now has her own dance school in Brooklyn! Who's your favorite person? I probably talked way too much about myself, right? I hope you write me back, Captain Rogers. Mommy and daddy say that soldiers are out there protecting us and our country and I hope that you are safe. And thank you for protecting us! The school told us that our letters are supposed to make you feel good and make you smile. I don't know if I done that so I'll add a picture of Lucky stealing Daddy's pizza and running away. I hope I hear from you:)_

 _Hello Lila!_

 _It's so nice to meet you! Your letter definitely made me smile! I'm already looking forward to your next one! I think it's only fair to tell you something about me since you told me something about yourself. First of all, please call me Steve. I'm turning 32 this summer and I'm from Brooklyn, actually. So we're neighbors! I joined the army after art school with my best friend Bucky. We've been in the same unit ever since. Your dog looks very cute and who doesn't love pizza? I've never had a dog, but I might get one when I get home. We didn't have lots of money when I was a kid so we couldn't afford to have a dog. I love to draw and I hope that you enjoy the little sketch of Lucky. Your family sounds very lovely and I'm very happy that you're the one who's gotten my name. Take care!_

Fall 2016

 _Hey Lila,_

 _All the guys loved the little care package that you sent us! The cookies were amazing! Thank you so much! Bucky wants to know if you'll marry him when you're eighteen or if you at least will give him the recipe. Just give him the recipe. Bucky is way too old for you and you can do such much better;) I'm really glad to hear that little Nate is doing better now and that the bronchitis is gone. I've been sick a lot as a kid and that hadn't been any fun. It's so awesome that you get to be the sugarplum fairy! I bet your parents were very proud when your aunt told that she picked you for the role. And you don't have to worry, I don't think your aunt would have chosen you if you're were bad. She chose you because you are the best for the role and not because you're her niece. I have good news- this is my last tour. I'll be coming home in six months and then I'm staying for good. I love this job, but it's time for me to do something else. Take care!_

 _Steve,_

 _this is so awesome that you're coming home! You have to come over for dinner or something so that we can meet in person! My mom's the best cook in the whole world! She can cook your favorite dish! What's your favorite one? Mine is lasagna! You have to visit us! Are you moving back to Brooklyn? Then you have to come over, you have to! Auntie Nat and her boyfriend broke up. I never liked him. Do you have a girlfriend? If you do, I'm sure she's nice but not as nice and pretty as Nat! I'm so excited that you're returning to America! I really want to meet you! We are friends, right? And friends meet each other! Please say that you'll visit us!_

Winter 2016

 _Hi Steve,_

 _it's so awesome that you're coming home soon! Only two more months! What is the first thing you're gonna do once you're back here? I think I would eat candy until I get sick. I asked mommy and daddy again and they really would love to invite you for dinner some day. I think it's so cool that I have two grown up friends now! I think you really gonna like Nat! She has to come too, when you're coming to dinner! Nat is the coolest person ever! She's super pretty and the smartest person I know! Are you a dancer? If not, Auntie Nat can teach you! She even taught dad how to dance for his wedding to mommy! I hope you're well. Stay safe and thank you so much for the scarf you sent me for my birthday! I can't believe I almost forgot to thank you for that! Sooorry! And I can help you find a dog if you still want one? My auntie Nat has a cat named Liho and she only lets me and Nat pet her! Nat has her cat from the shelter, I think they have dogs there too! The three of us can go together! I already wish you Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year in case the next letter doesn't arrive before then!_

 _Dear Lila,_

 _I'm glad you like the scarf! I think the first thing I'll do is hugging my ma when I'm home. And I definitely want a pizza from my favorite pizza place. And thank your parents for inviting me! I definitely look forward to it. I can't wait to meet you. Your letters really mean a lot to me! I can't dance at all and I'll probably make a fool out of myself if I try. I still want a dog, but I have to settle in before I can look for one. Of course I want your help if your parents are okay with it. You are an dog expert after all! I'll see you soon, Lila! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, Steve._

* * *

Steve had been home for two and a half weeks and it was good to be finally back in Brooklyn. His mother didn't have to tell him, he could see that she was more than relieved that he wasn't overseas anymore. And he was glad as well. That part of his life was over and he was looking forward to build a life in Brooklyn. He and Bucky already found an apartment and he had a few job interviews in the next weeks. He was really hoping that someone would hire him as an illustrator, because that was what he wanted to be. He'd met a Phil Coulson through his friend Sam who got him an interview with New York's most successful publisher and Steve really hoped that they would hire him. But he wouldn't think about that tonight. No, tonight he was having dinner with the Bartons and he was really looking forward to it.

Lila Barton's letters had meant a lot to him and he'd always read them with a smile on her face. She was such a kind and sweet kid and it had been good to be reminded that people like her had been the reason why he'd joined the army.

He put the present for the kids under his arm and bought flowers for Mrs. Barton on his way to her house. His ma had raised him right and told him that he couldn't show up empty handed up. He hadn't known what to get Lila's dad, but he hoped that he would like the present for the kids as well.

The house the Bartons lived in was really nice and he walked up the stairs to knock on the door. Maybe he would live in a such house with his own family one day as well.

The door opened and a redheaded woman came into his view. Wow, her green eyes were just beautiful. "Yes?"

"Uh-" He cleared his throat. He never knew what to say when he was talking to a pretty girl. "I'm Steve Rogers."

"Steeeve!" Someone screamed his name and the beautiful woman got pushed out of the way. "You're here!" Lila wrapped her arms around his waist. "Hello!"

He chuckled and looked down at her. "Hello!"

"So, you're Steve." He looked up at the woman standing in front of them. She seemed amused and he was pretty sure that she was checking him out. "Lila won't stop talking about you. I'm Natasha."

So, this was Natasha? Lila hadn't been exaggerating. She really was super pretty. "Nice to meet you." He offered her his hand while Lila was still wrapped around him. She took his hand and he was sure that he wasn't the only one who felt a little spark when their hands touched.

He was introduced to the rest of the family and the dinner was great. Everyone was so kind and it was nice to get to know the people Lila had been writing about. Lila's dad invited him to go with him and his friends to the next Yankees game and he promised Lila that he would come to her next dance recital.

Apparently he and Natasha, who he hadn't been able to take his eyes off during his stay, lived in the same area and Lila decided that he should walk her aunt home which he immediately agreed to. Because he was a gentleman and because, and he didn't know why, he was _really_ drawn to her. He loved the sound of her voice and he was charmed by the constant little smirk on her beautiful face.

They walked through their neighborhood and Natasha really didn't live that far away from him. "Thank you for walking me home. You're a gentleman." She said with that smirk on her face.

"You're welcome?"

She laughed. "I feel like I should warn you. Lila can be a little minx and I'm pretty sure that she wants to set us up."

"What?"

"She's been talking about how great you are for months and I wouldn't be surprised if she wrote to you about me."

He blinked at her. "Yeah, she actually has. But only good things."

She seemed amused. "She better be, because I have to say that I might be interested." She... _What_? "Goodnight, soldier." She winked and then walked into her apartment building leaving him confused behind.

Did he have a chance? She intrigued him and he definitely wanted to get to know her better. He couldn't explain it, but there was definitely _something_ between them.

* * *

Natasha was with them when they went to the Yankees game and Steve was pretty sure that she was flirting with him. She touched his arm a lot, joked with him, and he managed to make her laugh a few times. He was really glad that baseball games were sometimes so freaking long, because he and Natasha were mostly just focused on each other. He wouldn't even have noticed that their team had won if they hadn't gone to a bar afterwards to celebrate the victory. Natasha sat down next to him in the booth and he didn't miss how Clint watched them with a grin on his face. Natasha shook her head and her friend looked away.

"And how are you dealing with being back in New York?" She asked, stealing one of his fries.

"Good. Better than I thought I would be. My mom's over the moon that I'm back."

Natasha smiled. "So is Lila. She told me that you draw?"

He nodded. "I'm hoping that I can make money with it. I got a job interview at Shield next week."

"That's the big publishing company in Manhattan, right?"

"Yup. I hope they'll hire me as an illustrator."

She stole another fry. "I'm sure they will." She scooted closer to him until their shoulders were touching. "Are you seeing anyone?"

Was she asking because she was interested? _He_ was definitely interested in her. "No. Are you?"

She smirked up at him. "No." She answered and leaned her head on his shoulder, focusing on Clint who was telling a story.

He'd asked Bucky for advice since his best friend was a ladies man (he already had a new girlfriend) and he'd advised him to show Natasha that he could be a flirt as well, which he really wasn't. He was terrible when he tried to be smooth.

He didn't know what else to do and so he decided to give Natasha flowers when he would see her the next time and Lila's dance recital at her dancing school seemed like a good occasion to bring someone flowers. He got her a bouquet of multi-colored daisies (roses seemed a bit over the top) and looked for her after the performance. He found her backstage, tiding up.

"Hi, Natasha."

She looked up from the box where she was putting in costumes. "Hey. Did you like the show?"

"Yes. It was great." He came closer to her and handed her the flowers. He felt a bit awkward. "Uh, these are for you."

She looked surprised, but then she smiled brightly. "Thank you, Steve. That's very sweet of you. Daisies are one of my favorite flowers."

"I'm glad that you like them." And he really was and judging by her reaction, getting her flowers had been a good idea.

"How did your job interview go?"

"Great! I got the job!" He had completely forgotten about that and was so touched that Natasha remembered. That meant that she cared, right? Should he ask her on a date?

Lila chose that moment to storm into the storage room. "Auntie Nat!" She threw herself into her aunt's arm. "The show was so much fun!"

Natasha laughed and patted Lila's head. "I'm glad you liked doing it."

Lila turned to look at him. "Steve, are you going to get a dog soon?"

He thought about it. He had a job so he could afford one, and between him and Bucky, they had enough time to take care of one. And he really wanted a dog.

"Yeah, I think so."

"Can Nat and I help you pick one? We can go to the shelter where you got Liho from!" She looked back at her aunt.

Natasha smiled at him. "Are you sure you're okay with that?"

He nodded. "Yeah. And I'd really like for you two to help me with that."

* * *

A whole month passed until he had finally the time to go with Natasha and Lila to the animal shelter. His new job was amazing, but it had been very hectic in the beginning. He hadn't seen Natasha or the Bartons during that time, but he'd exchanged numbers with Clint and he had been more than happy when Clint had texted him Natasha's number because she wanted him to have it. Since then, they had been texting constantly and even talked on the phone a few times.

Natasha and Lila were already at the shelter when he finally arrived after his work day. The kid was waving and he didn't miss Natasha checking him out.

"Hi, Steve!"

"Hey, Lila. Natasha." He nodded at her while he hugged Lila back.

"Hey. You look good in a suit."

"Uh, thanks." He tried not to blush, almost thankful for his work dress code.

Lila dragged them inside and after they talked to the staff, they were allowed to check out the dogs. He had no idea what kind of dog he wanted. He just didn't want a small one, but other than that, he didn't care.

The kid was running from cage to cage, squealing and trying to pet every dog. He and Natasha stayed a little bit behind. "So, what are you looking for?"

"I like to take the dog on my morning runs. And I think I want a cuddly one." He blurted out.

Natasha chuckled. "You like to cuddle? Good to know." He tried to come up with a smooth reply, but of course he couldn't think of anything.

"What about this one? He's so cute!" Lila suddenly asked and he looked into her direction. She was pointing at a medium-sized mud with brown and white fur.

He came closer to them and knelt down. The dog wiggled its tail and pressed against the cage, when Steve tried to pet him through the fence. "Hey, buddy."

"His name is Dodger." Natasha said, reading the little card next to the cage. "He's been here for a few months. He's very active, family friendly and loves to _cuddle_."

"Hey, Dodger." He cooed and the dog barked happily. Yeah, he had good feeling about this one.

"I'll ask the lady from the front desk if we can take him on a walk!" Lila said, running out of the hall.

He stood up and looked at Natasha who smiled at him. "I think you found your new dog."

He nodded. "Yeah, I think so too. Thanks for coming with me."

"You and your new pal could take me on a date as thank you." She grinned and stepped closer to him.

"Yeah?"

"Mm-hm." She bit her lip and then pecked his lips. "Maybe even tonight."

His mind was still trying to process everything, so it took him a second to reply. "I don't think they give me the dog today. Looks like it's only me who takes you on a date tonight."

She smiled and kissed him again, and this time he returned the kiss. "Might be better this way. Dodger is so much cuter than you."

He looked at the dog and then back to Natasha who was smirking. Yeah, she kinda had a point there.


	80. Hi (Part VII)

_Natasha's seventy years without Steve_

* * *

 _London, September 1945_

It hadn't been easy, but Natalia finally gotten the Red Room off her trail and she was _free_. She knew that they wouldn't find her and she could start her new life. Her new life with _Steve_.

She had always thought that love was for children, but then this beautiful man had walked into the bar and she had been immediately smitten. She hadn't been able to take her eyes off of him and she had felt so comfortable during their conversation. She had known that it had been risky to let him walk her home, to let a stranger (an _American_ stranger) know where she was staying, but she had felt it deep in her bones that she could trust him. Natalia had been with a lot of men, because of her job and sometimes just out of boredom, but none of them could ever compare to Steve. Yes, he had been inexperienced, but it still had been perfect. For the first time in her life a man had _made love_ to her and she wanted more of that. She wanted a life with him and that was why she had come back to the bar.

The war was finally over and she and Steve could run away together. He would take her to America and they would be together. She was sure that she had enough money saved so that they could buy a house in Brooklyn. She could be a dancer and Steve could be an artist if he wanted to. She smiled to herself, wondering how long it would take until he would propose to her. She'd never thought that was something that she would want, but the idea of being his wife was more than appealing to her. He was a kind and wonderful man, a marriage to him wouldn't cost her her new freedom. No, he was different than those man who just wanted someone to cook them dinner and give them children.

Maybe the Americans could reverse what the Red Room had done to her and she could get pregnant after all. She would love to be the mother of his children.

She turned around the street corner and the bar came into her view. It was still closed and Steve was nowhere to be seen. She wasn't worried about that though, she knew that it could take some time until he would show up. Who knew where he had been when Japan had surrendered.

She walked to the cafe near by where she could perfectly watch the bar. She ordered a coffee and a piece of cake, waiting for Steve to show up. The first thing she would tell him was that she loved him. She loved him and she knew that he had fallen in love with her as well. She had seen it in his eyes during their night together. And then she would take him to the hotel where she had book a suite for them so they could talk about their future. And then they would make love. She couldn't help but smile. She was so happy and excited that her life with him was _finally_ about to start.

Steve didn't show up that day. But it didn't matter. She would come back the next day.

He didn't show up the next day. And the day after that. And the day after that.

She knew what it meant, but she didn't want to believe that. No, it couldn't be. He couldn't be...She couldn't even think about that.

Natalia waited a whole week. She came to the bar everyday, waiting for him for hours, but he didn't come. She walked back to her hotel room, staring at the bed where she had pictured her and Steve loving each other. The first tears were falling down her face. Steve was _dead_. She just knew that he was. She had fallen in love and her love had died.

How could she have believed that she would get to run away with the man of her dreams? Had she really been so stupid to believe that her destiny would be to be the wife of an American? To dance and come home to a man who loved her and was good to her? Of course she didn't get to have such a life. She was a weapon and not a real person, and Steve had paid the price.

She broke down crying. She cried for Steve and how his life had ended way too soon. She cried for the life that they could have had together. And she cried for herself. The Red Room had done terrible things to her to make her stronger, to turn her into marble, but that pain was nothing compared to what she was feeling now. She had never loved anyone before and now losing the one person, that she did love, was just _unbearable_. What was she supposed to do now?

* * *

 _New York, 1947_

 _Of course_. Of course, her first mission in America would bring her to New York City. Sometimes life was just fucking cruel. She knew that the Red Room knew that she had tried to run away, but they didn't know what, or rather _who_ , was the reason. It was just cruel irony that they had sent her to check in on Dottie and her weird obsession with an agent named Carter. But maybe it was also a sign. She knew that Steve had worked with the SSR and this job gave her the opportunity to find out more about him. She had been more than shocked when she'd realized that Steve Rogers was _Captain America_ , but then again, of course he was. Only a man like Steve could have make Captain America such a hero and inspiration to million of Americans. And of course, he had sacrificed his life to save the world. She was so proud of him, but it still hurt so fucking much. She still missed him so much and it had been two years. Would it always hurt this much?

Carter and Dottie were doing one of their cat and mouse chases, so Natalia decided to use that time to check out the SSR base in New Jersey, hoping that there would be files about him.

Sneaking into the facility was way too easy. The Americans really needed to work on their security. She searched the base until she finally found the building where the files were stored. It took her some time until she found the aisle where the files of the agents and soldiers where whose last name started with R.

Rogers, David.

Rogers, Matthew.

Rogers, Peter.

 _Rogers, Steven._

There he was. She had to take a deep breath to calm herself down. She pulled the file out of the cabinet and sat down on the floor. She took another deep breath before she opened the file. A photo fell out of it and she picked it up. Her heart stopped beating for a second. It was Steve before he'd gotten the serum. God, he was so beautiful. She blinked her tears away and traced his face with her fingers. He hadn't needed the serum, he had already been perfect. He still would have taken her breath away and she would have fallen in love with him. She carefully stuck the photo into her jacket. This was the only piece that she had of him and she decided to keep it. No one knew about her, but she was the only one who deserved to have it.

She read his file with a small smile on her face. He had always been a good man and the perfect candidate to get the serum. No one else would have deserved it. She laughed a little when she read that Steve had lied several times to get enlisted. Even when he had lied, he had done it for a good cause. Her heart broke for him when she found out that Steve had lost his best friend in the Alps and there had been nothing that he could have done to save him. She barely remembered Sergeant Barnes, but he had to have been a good man if he had been Steve's best friend.

She stood up, put the file back into the cabinet, and left the facility right before the sun rose. She looked around, her chest tight, thinking that this had been a place where Steve had lived, where he had gotten what he always wanted, and that he had died way before his time.

She didn't want to, but she knew that she had to go back to the Russians. She had no place in the world.

* * *

 _Paris, 1958_

These kind of missions were Natalia's favorite kind. She loved to work undercover and to just live in a city for a few months while she was trying to get closer to her target. It almost felt like she was a normal person. Yes, she had to infiltrate the high society to get closer to Parisian politicians to find out what they knew about the Soviet plans and possibly had to kill a few people, but she still had time for herself. She could wander around the city, enjoy the art and just be a normal woman.

She had to buy a dress for a gala that an old and rich Parisian official had invited her to. She knew that the man wanted to sleep with her and she had to indulge him since he had strong ties to the US, and Russia had to know how far they were with their space program. The Americans had already succeeded in having the first super soldier, Russia couldn't let them have space as well. Natalia would again have to use her body to serve her country. And like every time she would try her best not to think about Steve. It still felt so wrong to be with someone else, even if it wasn't her choice.

She found a beautiful dress when she stopped by Dior and they promised to deliver it to her apartment within the week. She was eternally grateful to the sales woman who had ignored Natalia's teary reaction to the wedding dress in the back of the dressing room area. The woman probably thought that she was waiting for a proposal and not that the dress had been perfect for a wedding with her dead love.

Her and Steve could have been married for a decade if fate hadn't been so cruel to them. She hadn't aged in the last decade and she was sure that Steve wouldn't have as well. Maybe she would have been pregnant now or they would have already had children. A little boy who just looked like his father. She never bothered to go to a doctor when she was in the States to find out if her sterilization could be reversed. Why bother? The man she wanted to be the father of her children was dead.

She decided to wander around Paris after this emotional afternoon to distract herself. She couldn't let herself think too often about Steve or it would destroy her. It had been ten years and she was still in love with him. Why had she only gotten one night with the love of her life? It just wasn't fair!

A few happy couples crossed her path and she hated them all. Did they even know how lucky they were? She could understand why _she_ didn't deserve happiness and love, but why didn't Steve? Why did he have to die so young? If anyone deserved love, happiness and a long life, it would have been him.

The finale andante of Swan lake interrupted her train of thought. Where was the music coming from? She followed it and ended up in front of a dancing school. The doors were wide open and she could see the students dancing. Some of them had talent, others...not so much.

"Bonjour, mademoiselle!" An elderly woman came closer to her. Natalia could tell by her posture and grace that she was a former ballerina.

"Bonjour." She replied with a heavy American accent since it was part of her cover.

"Américain? You're welcome to stay and watch," The woman took a closer at Natalia. "Are you..a... danseuse de ballet? Uh, a _ballerina_?"

Wow, the lady was good. "Yes, as a young girl." She watched the young women end their performance. Most of them were amateurs, but they were a few who had talent.

"You're welcome to join us." The woman smiled warmly at her. "Everyone with a passion for ballet is welcome."

Natalia thought about the offer. Going to a few dance classes wouldn't jeopardize her cover. That old Parisian would probably like to seduce a young American dancer. And she hadn't danced in ages.

 _I'd love to see you dance, Natalia._

Steve's voice echoed through her mind. No, she couldn't dance. No, she had wanted to dance for _him_. To work as a dancer and then come home to him.

"Are you alright, chérie?"

She looked at the woman. "I...I can't...I have to go...I'm sorry." She choked out and ran away.

* * *

 _Hamptons, 1991_

Shit! She had been too late. The Winter Soldier had already completed his mission. Fuck! She gotten the intel too late that he had been ordered to kill Howard Stark. For the first time she had failed in protecting Steve's friends. God, she was so fucking furious with herself! If she had gotten here an hour earlier, she could have saved Howard and Maria Stark, but they had already been dead when she'd arrived.

She had managed to prevent countless attempts on the lives of Director Carter and the members of the Howling Commando for almost fifty years and now the Winter Soldier had ruined it. She had promised herself that she would look out for Steve's friends and now she failed that promise. She failed _Steve_.

She closed the eyes of Maria Stark and then walked over to Howard Stark.

"I know that you have been looking for him all these years. That means a lot. Even though you have no idea who I am or what I meant to him. Thank you for not giving up on him." She whispered before she closed Stark's eyes as well. It would have been great if Howard Stark would have found Steve's body and he could have gotten a real burial. Natalia only had that one photo of him and having a place where she could go and talk to him would have been nice.

She promised herself that she would keep an eye on Stark's son because she knew that Steve would want her to.

* * *

 _Kiev, 2004_

She was sent to assassinate Yushchenko to ensure that Yanukovych would win and the Orange Revolution would end the way Russia wanted it to be. Usually these kind of jobs were quickly done, but she was being followed by someone from SHIELD. The agent had already prohibited two assassination attempts and Natalia was getting annoyed. She was just here to kill someone, and now she had to be careful that she wasn't going to get killed as well.

Yushchenko would speak to his supporters today and she wanted to use that chance to take him out. She knew that it was dangerous to sit on a roof with a rifle when someone was out there to kill her, but this was her first chance to get close to her target in days and she had to take it.

Her phone vibrated and she read the text that she had gotten from her handler.

 _The agent's name is Barton. He's one of SHIELD's best. Eliminate the threat._

She didn't really care about the guy's name, but she would go after him once she'd killed Yushchenko. She heard people cheering and looked over to the stage. Her target was here. She was about to get to work when her rifle suddenly fell off the roof. What the hell? Was there an _arrow_ sticking to it?! _What the fuck_?

"What's a nice girl like you doing with a weapon like that?"

She turned to the side and a man was standing at the edge of the roof. _Agent Barton_. She wanted to draw her gun but he fired a _fucking arrow_ and it landed next to her, causing a little explosion. She lost her footing and the gun glided across the roof. _Great_.

"Shield can't afford modern weaponry, Robin Hood?" She taunted, while trying to come up with a plan.

"Ha, like I've never heard that nickname before. Very original!" He replied sarcastically and came closer to her, his bow pointed at her. She'd never been hit by an arrow, but it was probably painful. He had to come closer to her so she could disarm him and push him off the roof or snap his neck. "Tell me, why does someone follow kill orders when she simultaneously saves the lives of Directors Carter and Fury."

 _Shit_. How did he know? "I have no idea what you mean, William Tell."

"He actually had a crossbow, not a bow." Barton smirked. "We have reason to believe that a foreign agent tried to kill Directors Carter and Fury when they had been in London. The sniper missed the car and we found his body a few hours later. We also found CCTV footage of a redheaded woman leaving the crime scene right after the failed attack." He looked downright amused and Natalia was fuming. She had been so sure that no one had seen her and that she had been out of reach of any security cams. What a rookie mistake. She had only been there to save Steve's friend Carter, she hadn't even known that the current Director had also been in the car. "You might wanna think about a new hairdo. That color is pretty recognizable."

"You wanna talk hair or you wanna fight?"

"There's no reason for us to fight. Come with me."

Her eyes widened. Had Barton lost his mind? "You think I'll surrender just like that? I know what you'll do to me. No, thank you!"

"I don't want you to surrender. I want you to join me. Join SHIELD. We can always use someone like you." Okay, he had definitely lost his mind if he'd thought that she was buying his bullshit.

"I'm not falling for that crap."

"It's not crap. You saved the lives of two SHIELD directors, and Director Carter somehow thinks that it wasn't the first time that you've done that. You can come with me and work for us. You'd have your freedom and could use your skills to help people."

She looked at him. Was he really telling the truth? Could she just switch sides? Start a new life? What was she supposed to do? She was unarmed and Barton could have already killed her, but he hadn't. What would _Steve_ do? He would believe in the good of people. He'd want her to change her life. She eyed Barton for a moment. He was relaxed, he wasn't going to kill her. She made a choice in that moment.

"Take me to your leader."

* * *

 _Washington DC, 2012_

Natasha hated paperwork, but it needed to be done. Coulson always wanted everything to be done by the book and proper paperwork was part of it. She was just about to open Word when her door flew open and Coulson stormed into the room. He looked downright _excited_ and Coulson rarely showed any emotion at work.

"Are you okay? Did Thor come back to earth?"

"They found him, Natasha!" He basically screamed at her. "We finally found him."

"Who? What are you talking about?"

"Captain Rogers!" She could just stare at him. _What_? They had found Steve's body? "And he's alive! He's in a coma, but he's alive! I'm leaving in fifteen minutes to see him myself. You wanna come with me?"

Her heart was pounding in her chest. Was he really alive? After all this time? _How_?

"Natasha?"

"Uh, go without me. I still have to track down Luchkov, remember?" She managed to get out calmly, but she was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Steve was _alive_.

"Right." Coulson nodded. "Keep me updated on that." He added and left her office.

She tried to control her breathing, but she had no success. Steve was alive and she had done so many horrible things in the last seventy years. How was she ever going to face him?

 _Helicarrier, 19 days later_

She was more than nervous, she had no choice but to face Steve. Clint needed her to save him from Loki and they couldn't do that without Captain America's help. Would he be happy that she was still alive? Had he even wanted to come to that bar or wouldn't he have showed up even when he could have? Had everything just been in her head? Would he hate her, once he knew who and what she really was?

Coulson came down the ramp of the quinjet with Steve in tow. He still looked exactly the same. He was still so beautiful and he looked confused and excited when he looked around. And then his eyes landed on her and he looked like he'd seen a ghost.

"Agent Romanoff." Coulson said and then pointed at Steve. "Captain Rogers."

He seemed so confused, but also _hopeful._ "Ma'am?"

She couldn't help but beam brightly at him. He was _alive_ and he was _here_. He'd come back to her.

"Hi." She breathed out, her emotions threatening to overwhelm her. "I thought we said one week and not almost seventy years, Steve Rogers."


	81. Hi (Part VIII)

_2021_

Natasha didn't like to keep things from her husband. She usually told him everything, but she wasn't ready to talk to him about what was going on with her. She had to make sure that it was a possibility and not a just a fantasy, because she didn't want to get his hopes up.

She wanted a baby and she _knew_ that he wanted the same. He would never tell her, of course, because of her infertility, but she could see it in his eyes when he watched Tony and Pepper with little Morgan. He wanted a family and she was yearning for one as well. She had for over seventy years, ever since she'd met him. She'd never thought that she wanted children until him. She wanted _his_ children. A boy that was a little version of him and a girl that would have him wrapped around her little finger. She wanted all of this. The house was more than big enough for more members of the Rogers' family and she was sure that Liho would be happy about little humans who wanted to play with her.

Natasha sighed and leaned back against the kitchen chair, staring at the screen of her laptop. She had been looking for fertility specialists who could hopefully help her become pregnant. She knew there were other ways, but she wanted to carry their baby herself. She had the name of Pepper's OB/GYN who'd helped her friend become pregnant and maybe she could help Natasha as well. Liho seemed to sense her distress and planted herself into Natasha's lap and began to purr. She stroked the cat's fur and listened to the soothing sound.

She got up after a few minutes and checked the fridge and pantry to figure out what she was going to make for dinner. Steve was out with Bucky and Sam to watch the game, but he'd promised he'd be home for supper. Steve could teach their kids how to play baseball and they could spend the weekends at their beach house. She could picture them running along the beach and Steve would throw their little girl into the air and catch her. And she and Steve would be able to watch their grandchildren grow up and start their own families.. Would the children inherit their serums as well and would live for a very long time? She should talk with Bruce about that one day.

She wiped a tear away. Fuck, she wanted this so badly. What if she wouldn't get it? Would Steve leave her one day? For a woman who could give him biological children?

No, he wouldn't. She knew that. But she also knew that he wanted to be a father and she would do whatever it took so that he would be one.

She took a deep breath and pushed all thoughts about babies away and decided to make pasta tonight. She wasn't in the mood for anything fancy.

The water was boiling and she was currently making the pesto when Steve came home. She heard him greet Liho and then he came into the kitchen.

"Hi, sweetheart." He smiled at her and kissed her softly. "I missed you."

All her bad thoughts were gone, once she was back in his presence. With him, she could only be happy and at peace. "It were only a few hours."

"It felt like a lifetime. I like you so much better than Buck and Sam."

"Sweet talker." She chuckled and stirred the pasta. "I hope pasta and pesto is okay?"

"Of course." He pushed a little bag over the kitchen counter, smiling bashfully. "I saw this on my way home."

She gave him a confused smile, grabbing the bag. Steve usually drew her little sketches as token of his affection and didn't buy her something. She opened the bag and was looking at a Cartier box. Now, she was really confused. She got the box out and opened it.

" _Steve_..."

"Do you like it?"

She laughed a little. "Of course, I do. But this isn't something that you just get on your way home." She pulled the love bracelet out of the box. It was a simple gold one, but she knew that it still had been very expensive.

"Okay, you got me." He grinned sheepishly. "I ordered it weeks ago, but the engraving took some time. The guy who knows Cyrillic was on vacation."

She looked at the inside of the bracelet. _I'll love you for eternity._ She loved the fact that he'd chosen Cyrillic so most people wouldn't be able to read the message. "It's perfect, Steve. Thank you so much." She breathed out, grabbing his face to kiss him. God, he was so perfect and good to her. "I love you so much."

He brushed her hair out of her face. "I love you, too. So damn much."

She was about to pull him into another kiss when the water boiled over and she had to run to the stove. The pasta was thankfully not overcooked and she could serve her husband dinner. He set the table and opened a wine bottle while she put pasta and pesto into two bowls.

Steve helped her put the bracelet on and she told him to keep the little screwdriver that was the only thing that could open the lock. She liked the fact that he was the only one that could get the bracelet off of her. Back in her spy days, she wouldn't have been able to wear such a prominent piece of jewelry, let alone have a tattoo. But those days were long over and she could wear the bracelet to public events, when she had to leave her rings at home.

They were already done with dinner, but they were still sitting at the kitchen table, drinking wine.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you- Sam's gonna be an uncle again. His sister is pregnant."

"That's great." She managed to say. She knew she was being petty, but Sam's sister already had two kids and Natasha had none. When would it be _her_ turn? "When's she due?"

"This summer, I think. We should send her something."

She nodded absently. Everyone was having children, except them. It just wasn't fair. "I'll order something from the boutique where we bought Morgan's treasure chest."

Steve did the dishes while she wrote the grocery list. "I think I'll take a bath." She told Steve after she pinned the list to the fridge.

"You want company?" He asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Not tonight." She said softly and kissed his cheek. She wasn't in the mood. Steve, being Steve, of course didn't pout or tried to get her to say yes to sex; he just wished her a nice bath.

She drew herself a hot bath and got out of her clothes. She looked at her naked body in the mirror, picturing herself with a baby bump. Her gaze fell to her new bracelet and she smiled. She knew that she had a good life. Most women didn't have such a wonderful husband. But she wanted _more_. She wanted to have her husband's children and she would make that happen. If there was one thing that she and Steve had in common, then it was their stubbornness.

* * *

She had to put her search for a specialist on hold, because her family needed her. Bucky's niece Jamie died in a car crash and left her teenage daughter Rikki behind. The girl was obviously upset that her mother was dead and Bucky tried his best to be there for her. Natasha was surprised how hard it was for Bucky to get custody for his grandniece. He had been pardoned, he had a big apartment and enough money to take care of the girl. He was mentally stable and he was more than welcome to take a break from the team to be there for Rikki. There was a distant cousin in Florida where she could live as well, but neither Rikki nor her uncle wanted that. Rikki was a good kid and she deserved to stay in New York where her friends lived.

They were a lot of hearings in Rikki's case, and Natasha was sure that having Captain America as a character witness sealed the deal in the end, and Bucky was granted custody over Rikki Barnes.

She and Steve invited Bucky, Rikki and their lawyers Matt and Foggy to lunch at Rikki's favorite cafe, but Matt and Foggy had to head to a different case, so it was just the four of them.

Rikki was still grieving her mother, but Natasha could see that she was happy that she could live with her uncle. Bucky himself was over the moon, Steve had told her that Bucky would have moved to Florida if Rikki would have had to live with her cousin so she wouldn't be alone. He was a good man.

Steve and Bucky were at the bar, picking up their order, while she and Rikki looked for a table. They found one in the back of the cafe and Rikki sat down next to her in the booth. Without really thinking about, Natasha wrapped her arm around the girl.

"Is it bad that I'm happy?"

She looked at Rikki. "No, it's not. It's okay to be happy. And it's also okay to be sad. Your mom would want you to live your life. You can grieve for her, but still be happy about things, Rikki. There are no rules when it comes to grief, sweetie."

"I never lived with a guy before." She mumbled and Natasha laughed.

"You'll be fine. Just remind your uncle to always put the toilet seat back down." She joked and pressed a kiss to her temple. "And you can call me if he gives you trouble, okay?"

Bucky and Steve came with their food in that moment. "And who do I call if the kid gives _me_ trouble?"

"No one." She replied and shared a grin with Rikki.

She and Steve went home after lunch to give Bucky and Rikki some privacy. Her husband gave her a deep kiss when they were inside their house.

"What was that for?"

He smiled and caressed her cheek. "You've been so great to Rikki. And to Bucky. With everything." He kissed her forehead and she sighed. "She really looks up to you. It's important that she has a female attachment figure after losing her mother."

"She's a great kid."

Steve nodded. "Yeah, she is. I can't believe that Bucky is now technically a parent."

Her smile dropped a little. When would they become parents? She almost asked Steve, but she kept it to herself.

* * *

The appointment with Pepper's gynecologist had been devastating. According to her, the Red Room hadn't done a normal sterilization, no, they had basically destroyed her uterus and ovaries. The doctor wanted to talk to a few of her colleagues, but Natasha could tell that she wasn't very convinced that they would say something different. The woman couldn't even tell her if Natasha's eggs were still usable. Natasha knew that the chances of having her own biological child were pretty much nonexistent.

She tried to get her emotions under control on her way home. The gynecologist had been in Boston and she'd told Steve that she had to take care of something for Fury. She was devastated, but she wasn't willing to give up yet. Science was capable of so many incredible things, there had to be a way for her to get pregnant.

Natasha got through the front door and was greeted by Liho who rubbed herself against her legs. She patted her head and walked further into the house. She looked for Steve, but he wasn't downstairs.

She heard him singing when she walked up the stairs and found him in the guestroom. He had Morgan in his arms and was singing to her. Her chest felt tight at the sight before her. Would he ever be able to sing their own child to sleep?

He looked from Morgan to her and smiled. "Hi." He whispered, moving a sleeping Morgan to her portacrib. "Pepper and Tony had to leave town for a work thing and I offered to babysit." He laid the baby gently down and covered her with her blanket. He looked at the little girl with so much affection and joy that it killed her. He was born to be a father and she was the reason that he didn't have a child.

"Nat, what's wrong?" He asked with a worried look on his face.

She blinked at him, tears rolling down her cheeks. She hadn't even noticed that she was crying. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"For what?" He took the baby phone and walked her out of the room. "Natalia, what happened? Did something happen to Fury?"

"No." She shook her head. "I lied. I didn't have to handle something for Nick. I...I went to see a gynecologist in Boston."

"What happend to your one in New- _oh_." Steve was way smarter than people gave him credit for. "That's the one that helped Pepper...with Morgan, right?"

She nodded, not being able to look at him. Steve's arms were suddenly around her, pulling her against him. She buried her face in his chest and he ran his hand over her back. "I take it that it didn't go so well?" She nodded again and he pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "I'm sorry, Nat."

She looked up at him and his eyes were full of love and devotion. "They destroyed my body and it doesn't look like the damage can be fixed. There are a still a few people that might be able to help, but...I don't know if I will ever be able to give you a child."

He cupped her face and kissed her. "I don't need a child to be happy with you, you know that, right?"

"But you _want_ one, right?"

He sighed and rested his forehead against hers. "Natasha-"

"Please tell me the truth and not what you think I need to hear, Steve."

He pulled away to look at her and she could see the longing in his eyes. "Would I be happy if you told me that you were pregnant? Of course. But like I said, I love the life we have."

He was _still_ trying to spare her feelings. "I want a baby, Steve. I want _your_ baby. Do you want that, too?"

He closed his eyes. "Yes." He whispered. "Yes, I want that. I want to be the father of your children." It looked like the dam was broken now. "I want a little girl that looks just like you. She's gonna have your spirit and she's gonna be our little princess. You're gonna teach her ballet and you two are gonna wear matching tutus."

She started crying again. He had his own fantasies about their family. He wiped the tears away. "That sounds so lovely, but I don't know if I can give you that little girl."

"I love you. I love you more than I thought I would ever love someone, Natalia. You're my life." He kissed her softly. "And we're in this together. I can come with you to your next appointment. There are so many ways to have children these days." He kissed her again, this time deeply and passionately. "I need you to know that you're enough for me. I will still love and want you, no matter what."

"I love you, too." She whispered. She felt a lot better. She just prayed that they would have that little girl one day. And the boy she was picturing in her head.

* * *

Natasha's happiness was the most important thing to Steve. His wife came before anything and anyone else. And seeing her like this broke his heart. They had gone two specialist together and they both had bad news. Natasha had asked if they were at least able to extract eggs from her body for a surrogate, but none of them could say if it could work. He knew that she wanted to carry their baby herself, so it hadn't be easy for her to ask.

Yes, he wanted children. He hadn't really thought a lot about it when Natasha had told him all those years ago that she couldn't get pregnant. He'd really only wanted her and he didn't _need_ children. But he wanted them, he had for a while now. How could he not? Natasha was the love of his life and the most amazing person he'd ever met. She would be a wonderful mother. He wanted their family to grow. He often pictured Natasha with a mini version of herself in her arms. He saw how happy Pepper and Tony were with Morgan, and he wanted that for him and Natasha as well.

And it broke him when Natasha admitted to him that she had dreamed about them having children since they had met. She had this dream for almost eighty years and he wanted to make it happen. God, he wanted to be the father of her children so badly. They could adopt a baby, but he wasn't so sure if an adoption agency would give two people a child with their kind of lives. It had been so difficult for Bucky to get custody over his own niece.

Their last appointment had been in London and they were still in the city. Natasha was showering while he made a few phone calls. She was wrapped into a fluffy robe when she came into the bedroom of their suite.

"When's our flight back again?" She asked, flopping down onto the bed.

He sat down next to her and ran his hand down her smooth leg. "Change of plans."

"Huh?"

"We're spending the weekend in Paris. We need this. Just you and me, Nat. No talks about babies or ovaries or anything like that. We can't let this dictate our life."

His wife played with the belt of her robe. "Are you mad that it's such a difficult journey and it might end up fruitless?"

"No, sweetheart. I'm not mad. And I can live without children, but I can't live without you. And we have to remember that we're also a couple. Let me take my wife to Paris so I can romance her."

She was finally smiling at him. "I'd love that, darling. No more talk about our problems." She sat up on her knees and let her bathrobe fall down her body. He licked his lips and Natasha smirked. It had been some time since the last time they made love. "I want you, Steve."

He basically pounced on her, Natasha's laughter filling the suite.

Their weekend in Paris was perfect. They wandered around the city, went to the Louvre and the Muséé d'Orsay, and he even managed to get tickets for the Ballet de l'Opéra to surprise his wife. They made love again and again, had dinner at the Eifel Tower, and went shopping at Dior. He had been surprised that she wanted to do that, but he could tell that it meant something to her. She told him when they were laying in their hotel bed that she had found her dream wedding dress decades ago in that Dior store and that her actual dress had been a replica because she hadn't been able to track down the original one.

* * *

 _2022_

Natasha still couldn't believe that she was in Wakanda. The African country had opened its borders just months ago and surprised the rest of the world with its advanced technology and science. Wakanda was already living in the future.

She couldn't even remember what led to it, but she found out that the Wakandan medical field was way ahead of the rest of the world. The things Wakandan scientists and physicians could accomplish were truly miracles. Paralyzed people could walk again and women, who were told they could never get pregnant, gave birth to healthy babies. Princess Shuri, the sister of King T'challa, had been certain that she could fix Natasha's fertility issues and for the first time Natasha believed a scientist. The woman was so bright and had already made so many impossible things possible, that this would work as well.

Sam was leading the team while she and Steve were in Wakanda for Natasha's surgery. Steve was nervous and worried about her, which she appreciated, but there was no reason for it. This would work. She just _knew_ it.

They had dinner with the king, talking politics and possibly working together. She tried to pay attention, but she was too excited for tomorrow. Shuri had explained more than once to her how the procedure worked, but it was honestly a bit too complicated for her. And Natasha didn't really care what was done to her as long as it would work.

Steve was by her side, holding her hand, until she had to be taken to the OR. He let more than reluctantly go off her hand and told her that he loved her. The anesthesia worked pretty fast and she was out even before Shuri came to the OR to operate the machine that would heal her uterus and ovaries.

Natasha woke up with Steve already looking at her, his hand holding hers again. "Hi." He whispered softly.

"Hey." She answered, feeling surprisingly good.

"How are you?"

"Good. I'm not in pain." She smiled and pressed a kiss to his hand. "I feel actually pretty great. How did it go?"

Steve was now beaming at her. "You have the healthy uterus and ovaries of a twenty-something woman." He kissed her lips softly and tears were in her eyes. God, she was so relieved. "We have to wait for one cycle so your body can adjust and then we can start trying."

"Really?"

He nodded. "Yeah, really." He looked so happy.

She put her hand on her belly. She would never be able to repay Shuri for this. She looked at Steve who was still grinning brightly.

"I hope you know that means that I'll have my period soon, right? Is Captain America brave enough to get tampons for his wife? And I might get cranky. I haven't had my period in almost ninety years."

"Captain America never backs down from a challenge. And your PMS might be a good practice for when you are pregnant."

* * *

Steve got the text that his wife was ovulating when he was out with Sam having a few beers. He was grateful to Sam that he didn't say anything when he threw a few bills on the table and hastily left after saying goodbye to his friend. He knew that Bucky would have giving him shit about the whole thing. Their friends knew that they were working on having a baby and were very supportive, some more than others. He really hadn't needed the list of the most _fruitful_ sex positions that Tony had given him after the last team meeting.

He raced home on his Harley and almost knocked over poor Liho, when he stormed through the front door. Well, the cat had to get used to that. Kids could be a bit rough.

"Natalia?"

"Bedroom!" She yelled back and he sprinted up the stairs. He was nervous which was silly. He had been intimate with Natasha countless times, but this time it was _different_.

He opened the bedroom door and was greeted by a beautiful sight. Natasha had lit candles and was posing on their bed. She was wearing a new negligee that made her look like sin personified.

"Wow."

She smirked, clearly happy with his reaction. "Just because we're making a baby, doesn't mean it can't be fun."

"Yeah." He managed to get out and Natasha beckoned him to join her. He shut the door so Liho wouldn't disturb them and got to work.

Their first try wasn't successful, but they knew that it never really worked for any couple the first month. Natasha was sad when she got her period and he tried his best to cheer her up. They had already bought pregnancy tests, but this month they would stay untouched. They would be young for a very long time and they were both completely healthy, it would happen for them.

Rikki was turning sixteen and they threw her a party at the Tower. The whole team was here and all of Rikki's friends to celebrate her big day. He and Natasha had gifted the girl a new laptop and were watching her open her other presents when Natasha's app alerted her that she was ovulating. They managed to sneak away and ended up in the locker room of the gym floor.

"I think this was it." Natasha said, pulling her panties back up. It had been smart of her to wear a dress today.

"Nat-" He didn't want her to get her hopes up already.

"I know, I know. But I can feel it. We just made our baby." She smiled happily. "Let's never tell the little one how we conceived them." She grinned and pecked his lips. "Who wants to know that they are the result of a quickie at a party?"

He laughed and zipped his pants up. Bucky looked at them like he knew what they had been doing when they came back, but Steve didn't care. He was hoping deep down that Nat was right and they had just conceived their first child. They soon said goodbye to Rikki and the others to go home and try to make a baby a few more times. Better be safe than sorry.

He was out of the country when Natasha would be having her period, even though they both hoped that she wouldn't have it. She hadn't called or texted him and he didn't want to ask her if she'd gotten her period.

He got home before midnight, thinking that Natasha was already sleeping, but it looked she was still awake. The lights upstairs were on. Liho didn't come to greet him. That was a bit strange, was the cat sleeping?

"Natasha, sweetheart?"

"Bathroom."

He walked to the master bathroom and found Natasha sitting on the floor, Liho purring in her lap. "Nat?" He asked, confused. He was only now noticing the pregnancy tests in front of her.

"I'm too afraid to look. I'm two days late." She whispered. "But that doesn't have to mean anything."

"You want me to look?" He asked softly, kneeling down next to her. She nodded and he picked the first one up. Natasha had used at least six tests. He read the first one. His heart starting beating faster. And then he read the next one. And the one after that. He checked them all and they all said the same. _Pregnant._

"Natalia, look at me." She did and he smiled at her. They were finally going to be parents. God, Natasha finally got what she wanted for all those years. He would be a _father_. He would have a family of his own. He hoped that his mother could somehow see them right now. "They're positive. You're pregnant!"

She blinked at him. "Really?" She asked very quietly.

"Yeah, we're gonna have a baby." He beamed at her.

Natasha pushed Liho off her lap to crawl into his. "We're having a baby?" Her voice broke at the end of the sentence.

"Yeah, sweetheart. You're going to be a mom."

She smiled brightly at him and then buried her face in his neck. "I'm pregnant!"


	82. Hi (Part IX)

_2022_

Steve celebrated his 104th birthday with Natasha at their beach house. He had never been a fan of birthday parties and Natasha had to fight with her morning sickness so she wasn't in the mood for a party as well. She was at the end of her first trimester and his poor wife had to deal with all the symptoms. She could barely keep any food to herself, was exhausted all the time and she _hated_ pretty much every shower gel and aftershave he'd tried. He'd given up on shaving and used just plain soap to wash his body because everything else made her nauseous.

He had been in town, getting stuff for their BBQ tonight. Natasha had tried to make him breakfast, but the smell made her sick and she had to run to the bathroom. He had felt a little helpless, when she'd started crying because she thought that she'd ruined his birthday. She always made him breakfast in bed on his birthday and her pregnancy hormones were making her more emotional than usual. He'd told her that everything was okay and he just wanted to spend time with her. His wife was growing their child inside of her, that was already the best birthday present.

He put everything in the fridge before he looked for his wife. He found her on their bed in the bedroom, laying on her side, her face towards the windows. He thought that she was napping so he wanted to leave her alone.

"Hey." She whispered and turned around. God, she was so beautiful. She already had the famous pregnancy glow and she looked breathtaking. She truly was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. And she was pregnant with _his_ child. How did he get so lucky?

"Hi, sweetheart." He came closer and sat down on the bed. "How are you feeling?"

"A little better." She reached her hand across the mattress and he laced their fingers together. "I'm sorry, but I don't think you'll get birthday sex this year."

"That's okay." He chuckled and squeezed her hand. "I've read that women are insatiable in their second trimester. It's probably best if I save my energy for that." He winked at her and she laughed. "And besides, I'm sure you'll make it up to me next year."

"Next year, there will be a little _baby_." She smiled dreamily and he was sure that he looked the same. "I'm sure the little one will want all of our attention." She scooted closer to him and put his hand on her stomach. She did that a lot. He couldn't wait for when he would feel the baby kick. "I'm so happy, Steve."

He bent down to kiss her. "Me, too, sweetheart. Me, too." He whispered and laid down next to her for an afternoon nap.

Natasha managed to get a bit of salad down later that day, but pushed the ribs over to him because she couldn't stand the smell. They watched the fireworks from the balcony, and he was happy and content with his pregnant wife sleeping in his arms.

He woke up later that night because someone was poking him in the shoulder. "Steve? Wake up, darling!"

He blinked his eyes open and Natasha was hovering over him, looking down at him. "What? Are you okay? Is the baby okay?"

She smiled. "Yes, we're both okay."

He sat up and looked at her confused. "Then what is it?"

"I forgot to give you your present, my love." She smiled sheepishly. "I think I already suffer from pregnancy brain."

He hadn't even noticed that she hadn't given him anything and he honestly didn't care. He didn't need presents. He was married to the love of his life and she was pregnant with his child, what more could a man want?

"It's nothing fancy." She said, almost looking guilty. She handed him a wrapped box. "I made it myself."

He unwrapped the box and opened it. A leather-bound photo album was inside of it. "You made this?"

She nodded and her cheeks flushed. "I picked up a few skills over the decades. Open it."

He did as he was told and his breath got caught in his throat. She had made this album for their family, for their children. She had written their love story onto the first pages and included the napkin he'd drawn a ballerina onto when they had met. She had put a wedding photo and the first ultrasound picture of their baby in it as well. There were also pictures of their friends and photos of the two of them over the last ten years. He smiled at that. They had been together for ten years and were still madly in love with each other. And now their love created a baby. There were still a lot of empty pages left in the book.

"We can fill it with photos of our family. Add our children to it. This is our family book." She said softly. "Do you like it?"

He cupped her face and kissed deeply. "I love it, sweetheart. This is a great idea." Natasha beamed happily at him. "But you said _children_. How many do you want?"

"Honestly?" She bit her lip and he nodded. "Three or four. We can afford it and we have so much love to give. I want a big family with you."

He pecked her lips. "We can have as many children as you want. It's your body, your choice. I want as many children as you are willing to give me. I want our house to be filled with love and children's laughter."

Natasha slung her arms around his neck to kiss him. "You're my dream come true, Steve. All I want is you and this baby." She kissed him again. "And the babies after this one."

She pressed herself against him, kissing him hotly. He tried to pull away because his body started to react to her, but she tightened her hold on him. "I'm feeling better. I want you." She whispered into his ear before she bit into his earlobe. "Make love to me."

And he did.

Steve woke up alone the next morning, a little bit confused. The space next to him was cold, so Natasha had already been up for some time. Was she feeling sick again?

"Natasha, sweetheart?" He asked, getting out of the bed and searching for his underwear.

"Bathroom." Was her answer. God, he hoped that she wasn't feeling sick.

He put on his underwear and made his way into the bathroom. He stopped in the threshold, his heart fluttering in his chest because of the sight in front of him. She was standing in front of the mirror, completely naked, only wearing her rings and bracelet. Her right hand was on her stomach who was a little bit arched. She started _showing_!

"Can you see it?" She turned so he could see her from the side. "I know it's not much-"

"I see it." He breathed out. "God, Natalia, you're so beautiful. Stay right there!" She looked confused, but nodded. He quickly left to get his phone and took a few photos of his pregnant wife. He already knew that he would start a portrait of her later today.

"I hope you don't share this with the Avengers group chat." She laughed, posing for him.

"No one is ever going to see you like this besides me." He grinned back. God, she was truly a vision. "Cover your breasts with your arms so we have a photo that we can show the little one later, so they can see how beautiful their mommy was when she was pregnant with them."

She did as she was told and he took a few more picture of her. "I think we should do this every month."

"Good idea, sweetheart." He put his phone onto the edge of the bathtub and walked over to her. "You are so beautiful."

She smiled up at him. "Thank you, darling." She pressed herself against him and ran her hands down his back. "Steve?"

"Yes? Do you want breakfast?"

"No." She shook her head. "I think my second trimester has already started."

"Okay?"

She bit her lip, looking almost embarrassed which was very unlike his wife. She rose to her tiptoes and pressed her lips against his ear. "I'm horny."

He laughed when her hands landed on his ass. He had a thing for hers and she had one for his. Perfect match. "You're really know how to set the mood, doll." He gave her a dirty kiss and picked her up to carry her to the bedroom. It wasn't his birthday anymore, but it still felt like it was with the things they did that morning.

* * *

Seeing Natasha pregnant was still the most beautiful thing Steve had ever seen. She was so happy and just glowing. Her baby bump was still relatively small, but it was noticeable and Natasha wore it with pride. She wore loose clothing outside, but when she was in their house she wore tight shirts and leggings to show off her baby bump. They always sat on their patio at the end of the day with Natasha in his arms and his hand on her belly and Liho was sitting Natasha's lap. The cat was very gentle and protective of Natasha.

Natasha wasn't an active member of the team anymore since the start of her pregnancy and Sam was now his second in command. He hadn't told his friend about it yet, but Steve planned to pass the shield onto him. Steve would still join them, just like Nat, if they were needed, but they both wanted to focus on their family. A child needed a lot of attention, and their jobs were just too dangerous and he didn't want to leave Natasha and their child behind, and he couldn't even imagine doing this without his wife. No, it was time to give up the shield, at least until all of their kids were in college. And Sam would make a great Captain America.

He was already home and decided to continue to clean out the room next to their bedroom that would be the nursery. The baby would sleep in their bedroom for the first months, but they still wanted the room to be done before the baby was here. They had used the room as storage, and unfortunately a lot of stuff had ended up in here over the years. He was packing boxes for the storage unit when he heard that Natasha was coming home. She had been shopping with Laura since she and Clint were in town to celebrate their anniversary and Laura needed something for the occasion.

He shut the box and left the room to greet her. Natasha was still in the hallway with Liho in her arms and her face pressed into the cat's fur. He chuckled quietly when he saw the shopping bags around his wife. She had always loved shopping and she especially loved buying things for the baby.

"Hi."

She removed her face from Liho's fur and let the cat back down. "Hi." She smiled back at him and he came closer to kiss her.

"How was the shopping trip?"

"Good." She pecked his lips again. "It was great to catch up with Laura. It was just weird that Laura was the one who bought sexy lingerie and I'm the one who bought unsexy maternity fashion. You'd think they made better clothes by now." She shook her head and kissed him again. "I missed you, though. And the baby missed you, too."

"Yeah?" He pressed his hand on her belly. Natasha was already feeling the baby kick, but he hadn't had the privilege yet. "I missed you two, too."

Natasha smiled happily and kissed him again. "Steve? I'm hungry _and_ horny."

He laughed, giving her another kiss. This was pretty much her constant mood in the last two months. And she was so energetic that it was starting to freak him out. She had no problem to run around Brooklyn all day to shop baby things and then she wore him out in the bedroom. He was starting to think that _she_ was the one with the super serum and not him. While he was trying to catch his breath after their lovemaking, Natasha padded into the kitchen on the hunt for something to eat.

"How about I make you something to eat and then I take care of your other urge." He squeezed her ass and Natasha chuckled.

"Sounds like a plan." She went to the bedroom to put away her new clothes while he headed to the kitchen to make his pregnant wife something to eat.

Natasha had changed into one of his button down shirts when she came into the kitchen and he noticed with much joy that even under the too big shirt her belly bump was visible. She sat down on one of the chairs at the kitchen island, watching him making her a sandwich.

"Anything new with the Bartons?"

"Oh, yes! Cooper got that internship with the senator! He's very excited." She said, grabbing some strawberries from the bowl on the kitchen island. "And Nate is in the finals of the spelling bee contest."

"That's great. Clint and Laura must be so proud of their boys."

She nodded. "Yeah. It distracts Clint from the fact that Lila is going to college next year. I can't believe that my little Lila is almost a grown woman!"

He pushed the finished sandwich over to her, smiling. "It's gonna be even weirder when it's our _own_ kids who are gonna leave the house. Does Lila already know where she wants to go?"

"She asked Tony to write her a recommendation letter for MIT, so I think that's a favorite. I know that he's interested in Lila working for SI one day. She's truly a genius. She definitely didn't get that from Clint." She grinned and bit into her sandwich.

He laughed and shook his head. "Can you imagine how Buck is gonna react when Rikki leaves for college?"

Nat snorted. "He's gonna move into the dorm with her to make sure that she's not gonna meet guys like him. I taught her how to deal with men, he doesn't have to worry."

"You taught her how to kick them in the balls?"

"Yup. I will teach that our daughters as well!"

"That's my girl." He smiled proudly and moved around the kitchen counter to press a kiss to her forehead.

* * *

Bucky was helping him getting the boxes to the storage unit while Natasha was helping Rikki with her history assignment about the Soviet Union. Apparently Bucky had provided his niece with a lot of intel that she couldn't use for her school project without the CIA or Shield knocking on their door, so Natasha'd volunteered to help. Bucky and Rikki were a good team and he could see how much it meant to Bucky that he could take care of Rikki. He had missed watching his little sister grow into a woman and Bucky had loved Rebecca more than anything, but he had now the chance with Rikki and he knew that Rebecca and her daughter would be proud if they could see the two. Rikki had already offered to babysit for them, saying that she could use some extra money.

He and Bucky stopped by a diner to get food for the four of them before they drove back to the house. They found Natasha and Rikki in the living room with Rikki practicing her presentation. Natasha was sitting on the couch, eating a yogurt, and Liho was naturally next to her and it almost looked like the cat was actually listening to what Rikki was saying.

"Hi, you two!" He said, walking over to Nat to properly greet her. He bent down to kiss her quickly, but his wife deepened the kiss and he happily participated in it.

"Ew!" Rikki whined in the background and Nat grinned into the kiss.

"Yeah, ew!" Her uncle agreed. "Get off your wife, you already got her pregnant! I'm hungry!"

Steve watched Natasha absently eating her burger, her hand on her stomach. She was deep in thought and smiling from time to time. He was sure that she was thinking about their baby. She was five months pregnant, but it still amazed him every single day to see her pregnant. She loved being pregnant and he was just happy to see her so happy. He knew that she would be an amazing mother, he had seen the way she was with the Barton kids, with Morgan, and now with Rikki. God, their baby was so lucky to have Natasha as their mom.

He walked Rikki and Bucky after supper to the door and he noticed that Rikki was carrying a bag. He smiled, but didn't say anything about it. He was sure that Natasha had given the girl something from her closet.

His wife was laying on the couch with Liho on her lap, and the cat had her ear pressed against Natasha's belly. Could the cat hear the baby?

He joined her on the couch and Nat immediately snuggled into his side. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head and Liho jumped off her lap, not pleased that her human pillow had moved.

"What did you give Rikki this time?"

"Just a jeans jacket that I haven't worn since the late 90s. I'll never wear it again and she liked it." She snuggled even closer to him. "Don't worry, I have still enough clothes to give to our daughters."

"I know." He chucked. "The majority of the boxes that Buck and I took to the storage unit are your clothes, sweetheart."

Her eyes were closed and he thought that she'd fallen asleep, but she was still awake. "I want Clint to be one of the godparents of the baby."

"Yes." He agreed. Clint was a great choice. "Do we need godfather and god _mother_ or can it be two godfathers?"

She smiled, her eyes still closed. "Bucky can be a godparent, too."

He kissed her forehead and smiled at her. His wife knew him so well.

* * *

Ten years. Ten years they managed to keep their relationship a secret from the world. And now _everyone_ knew. The story that Captain America and Black Widow were together was everywhere. Every news outlet, every blog, just everyone was reporting about it.

Natasha hadn't come out of the bedroom yet. The world didn't know yet that she was pregnant and she was terrified that they would. And he was too. The baby had two super serums running through its veins and both serums were _very_ valuable. The thought that someone could try to take Natasha to...Steve couldn't even finish that thought or he would lose his mind. He had to keep the two most important people in his life safe. Natasha and the baby were his whole world.

He stood in front of the bedroom door, trying to come up with something to cheer Nat up. They had been always so careful. They'd never worn their rings to public events and didn't really show any PDA when they were outside. They'd even hired a private Lamaze teacher who came home to them instead of going to a class. He'd felt bad that Natasha didn't have the chance to bond with other mothers. There were Pepper and Laura who were a big help to Natasha, but it would have been nice if she'd could talk to someone who was _currently_ going through the same thing, but the risk was too high. The Lamaze teacher had signed a NDA that would pretty much ruin her entire existence if she told anyone who her clients were. He had felt guilty when he'd read the NDA that Pepper had sent over, but the safety of Nat and the baby was more important than anything.

He opened the door and peaked inside the room. Natasha was lying on their bed with Liho pressed against her side. Her hand was on her growing baby bump and he was sure that people would realize why she was wearing baggy clothes outside; he wasn't even sure if they could even still hide the bump.

"Natasha sweetheart?"

"We have to protect the baby." She whispered.

"I know." He answered and got into the bed, pulling her against him. His hand landed next to hers and he hoped that he would feel the baby kick. He had felt it a few times over the last two weeks and it was just... _amazing_. "We will. I promise you that I will always protect you two."

"What are we going to do?" He wished he had an answer. "Do we know who leaked it?"

"No. But it has to be someone who works at the Tower. Friday is looking into it." He said and Natasha made an unhappy sound.

"What if they are coming for the baby?"

He couldn't think about that. He only knew that he would kill anyone who would even think about laying a hand on his family. "No one even knows about the baby yet." He said, trying to calm her.

"But they will. I tried not to think about it, but one day they will know. Someone just has to see one of us with a baby and post it online and then..."

"You know that Friday deletes those posts immediately." He started to rub her belly. "And the world knows about Morgan."

"She's not the daughter of a super soldier." She whispered quietly and buried her face in his shoulder. She had a point.

"We can protect our child." He kissed her head. "I know you, Nat. You are going to be a mama bear. No one's wanna mess with your baby."

"I already love the little one so much, Steve. _So much_." She mumbled into his shirt. "I can't even..."

"I know how you feel." The love he felt for his child was unlike anything he'd ever experienced.

She looked up at him. "I always knew that people would eventually know that we are James' parents. I mean, at the latest when he goes to kindergarten or tells people who his parents are...but it's still scary!"

" _James_?" He asked softly. She wanted to name the baby James? And she thought that it was a boy? They didn't even know the sex yet, they wanted it to be a surprise.

"Yeah." She smiled a little. "James for a boy, and Sarah if it's a girl. But I think it's a boy."

" _Nat_." He choked out. She wanted to name the baby after his best friend or his mother?

"Do you like the names?"

"I love them!" He kissed her softly and hugged her closer to him. "But we don't have to name them after-"

"No, I _want_ to. And I want Clint or Laura as their middle names."

"I love that."

She smiled and kissed him again. She soon fell asleep in his arms and he looked up the ceiling, praying that nothing would ever happen to her and their child.

It was a former employer of SI who'd hit on Rikki's _underage_ friend during Rikki's birthday party which Tony had witnessed and immediately fired him. The guy had been angry and sold them out to the tabloids. SI wanted to sue, but it was already too late. The world knew that they were married and one day they would know about the baby. Tony came over to install a new and improved security system that was connected to Friday and Natasha felt a little better. And Steve did too. Tony stayed for dinner and he shared with them that he was always worried about Morgan's safety, but it was no way to live. And Tony was right, if anyone could protect their children, then it was them.

* * *

"And there's your baby." Bruce said with a smile and both Steve and Natasha looked at the screen with big smiles on their faces. "Little Rogers is healthy. There's no abnormal development. The serums don't seem to have any effect on the baby. How are you feeling, Nat?"

"Great. Well, I mean my back aches and I have to pee all the time, but I'm good." She laughed and Bruce nodded.

"Good. I send everything to your obstetrician. Have you decided where you wanna give birth?"

"Here, at the Tower." Natasha answered. "It's the safest place in the world. Well, according to Tony."

Steve pressed a kiss to her head. So far, they managed to keep the pregnancy a secret, but they had still six weeks ahead of them. They thanked Bruce for taking a look at the baby and Steve wondered if Bruce knew what sex the baby had. Natasha was convinced that they were having a boy ( _a mother just knows these things, Steve!),_ but he was still dreaming about a little redheaded girl. He would love a son just as much, but he was still picturing a mini version of Natasha running around the house.

Happy drove them home and Natasha immediately walked up the stairs into the nursery. He followed her after he changed the water in Liho's bowl and gave her some nibbles.

"Hey." He said softly, watching Natasha rearrange some books in the bookshelf.

"Hi."

"You okay?"

She turned around and smiled. "Yes, of course. I just want everything to be perfect."

"I know. And it is." He looked around. The nursery made things feel real. Their baby would be living here. Natasha had chosen everything with so much love and affection, the room looked beautiful. She'd chosen gender-neutral colors and he'd painted the room and drawn animals onto the walls. Natasha had sat in the rocking chair, talking to him. It had been the perfect afternoon. Laura had gifted them the Barton mobile and added a little Cap shield and an hourglass to it.

"Are you hungry, sweetheart?"

She shook her head and moved away from the bookshelf. "No, thank you. I think I'll take a nap. Do you want to join me, darling?"

"Of course." He kissed her lips before he bent down to press a kiss to her belly. They walked hand in hand to the bedroom and Steve waited until his wife found a comfortable position until he joined her in bed.

"He's soon here."

He chuckled. "Still convinced it's a boy?"

"I know it. Next one will be your little girl." She yawned and laced their fingers together. "I can't wait to meet our child."

"Me, too." He lifted their hands and kissed the back of her hand.

* * *

Steve and Tony went alone to the birthday party of the President. The rest of the team was helping Shield, and Bucky stayed in New York to keep an eye on Natasha. They both had told Nat that he wasn't going on the mission because of Rikki, but of course she knew that was a lie. But Natasha was heavily pregnant and she needed protection and Steve trusted all of his friends, but Bucky was _different_. He would protect Natasha and the baby no matter what.

Steve didn't even want to attend the party, but he knew he had to. The Avengers were technically freelancing and a good relationship with the President was very important. He'd ignored questions about Natasha and changed the subject. Being with Natasha for ten years had taught him a few things about these things.

He was talking to the Secretary of State when Tony suddenly appeared at his side, a little bit out of breath. "Why aren't you answering your fucking phone, Rogers!"

Steve looked from the Secretary to his friend. "Uh...I think my battery died. What is it?"

Now Tony looked a bit uneasy. "Uh...It's about...uh, the game...Your team won... and you've won 1000 dollars! Congrats, pal. Come with me to tell them your... bank info." What the fuck was Tony talking about?! He tried to ask him, but Tony was already leading him away from the Secretary. "Bye!"

He followed Tony out of the room, getting more confused by the second. Did something happen with Shield? "Tony-"

Tony looked around and he only started to speak when the waiter was gone. "Okay, don't freak out. But Natasha's in labor-"

"What?! No, the baby's not due for another three weeks!"

"Well, looks like the baby thinks differently. No one could reach you, so they called me." Tony tugged on his arm. "Friday's already sent a quinjet to the White House. Let's go, daddy."

He followed Tony on autopilot. Holy shit. The baby was coming. Natasha was in labor and he wasn't there. Fuck! What if he would be too late and he missed the birth? The quinjet was fast, but what if the baby was faster?! Oh God, he was on the verge of a panic attack! He tried to calm down, but he wasn't very successful. The baby was coming!

"Are you okay?" Tony asked him when the quinjet took off.

"No!"

Tony chuckled. "It's totally normal to freak out! I was losing my mind when Pepper was in labor. I don't think I was useful to her at all."

"What if I'm too late and the baby's already there?"

"Well, then Red is gonna hold that over your head for the rest of your life."

"That's not funny." He shot back. God, his wife was in labor and he wasn't there. Would he really miss the first moments of his baby's life? He wanted to be there when the baby would be laid on Natasha's chest and she was holding the baby for the first time.

"Is Natasha okay?"

"Yes, Captain Rogers, she is fine." Friday's voice suddenly filed the jet. "She's dilated by 7 centimeters. Her contractions are regularly and she and the baby are doing fine. Miss Rogers said, and I quote, to hurry the fuck up-" The AI sounded amused. "Or you are going to sleep on the couch for eternity."

"See." Tony smiled. "We still got three centimeters to go and we're only 40 minutes away from the Tower."

Those 40 minutes were the longest of his entire life. He had never been so nervous in his life before, not even the night before he'd gotten the serum. Right before they reached the airspace of New York City, Friday announced that Natasha was at 10 centimeters. Shit, she was giving birth and he wasn't there. How long did it take until a baby was born?!

Steve ignored Tony and already let the ramp of the jet down while the plan was still in the air and jumped down. He ran into the Tower and almost knocked over Sam who was waiting for him inside. He just heard Sam yelling that the baby wasn't there yet when he ran past by him to the medical wing of the Tower. He was sure that he'd never run so fast before.

He burst through the door and saw Natasha on the hospital bed, holding Pepper's hand who was murmuring to her.

"Steve!" She yelled through gritted teeth before she screamed.

"I can see the head!" Her doctor said in that moment and Steve wanted to look but Pepper called his name.

"Here, take your place, dad." She let go off Natasha's hand and stood up. "You're lucky you're in time."

He forgot to thank her for being there for Nat when he couldn't and just rushed to his wife's side. Her face was flushed and she was sweaty, but she'd never looked more beautiful. "This really sucks." She groaned. "I don't think I want that many children anymore."

"You're doing so great, sweetheart." He took her hand and kissed her forehead. "Natalia, I'm _so_ sorry that I almost missed it."

"I'm gonna make you pay for that later." She said before she had to push again. And then there was suddenly the scream of a baby and they both looked at each other. Their child was born.

"What a beautiful boy." The doctor said and laid the baby on Natasha's chest. A boy, they had a _son_?

Natasha looked down at their child and he'd never seen that look on her face before. She'd just looked so happy, she looked _beyond_ happy, she looked like she was finally at peace.

"Hi, my sweet little darling. I waited so long for you, my love." She pressed a kiss to the baby's head and then looked up at Steve. "This is our boy. This is _James_."

"He's perfect." He breathed out and placed his hand over Natasha's on their son. God, he felt so much love for his son. And for Natasha, it was like he fell in love with her all over again. This was everything. Natasha and James were everything. "Welcome to the world, James." He bent down to kiss his son on the head. I love you and your mommy so much. I promise I will always protect you and your mom. Always."


	83. Everybody knows

_Steve and Natasha think that their relationship is a secret, but the reality looks very different._

* * *

 _Sam_

He had been so sure that Steve and Natasha had been an item when Natasha'd showed up that one morning in her Corvette to pick up Steve. That belief had just strengthened when the two'd knocked on his door needing a place to lay low. He'd actually expected to walk in on them when he'd asked them if they wanted to have breakfast. And then Steve had fallen into the Potomac River and Natasha had been out of her mind. Sam was positive that Natasha would have killed Barnes if he hadn't dragged Steve out of that river.

She had been a mess during Steve's surgery and hadn't left his side until she had to go to that congressional hearing. Sam had still thought that they were a couple and he had been more than surprised that Natasha hadn't come with them to look for Barnes and he'd been even more surprised when Steve'd said that he and Natasha were just friends. But Steve talked about her _all the time_ during their search for Barnes and she called him a lot for someone who was supposedly working on new covers.

Sam had always known that Steve was in love with Natasha and he was also pretty sure that she had feelings for him as well, she was just better at hiding it. And because of that Sam wasn't surprised when he saw Natasha walking out of Steve's motel room in Prague when he'd come back from his run. He didn't think that she noticed him, but you never knew with her. But he definitely saw her tousled hair, the small smile on her face, and the hickey on her neck when she'd left the room.

He didn't know how long they were together, maybe Steve had been lying to him about DC, and it wasn't really his business, but he did know that these two were good for each other and that one day they were ready to tell him about their relationship.

* * *

 _Tony_

Tony wasn't often at the compound. No, his avenging days were over. He still designed everything and paid for everything, but he barely put the suit on nowadays. And he preferred it that way. His focus was now on Pepper and making sure that Parker didn't get killed in Queens. He stayed mostly in New York City, but he did make the trip upstate from time to time to see the team. The compound had everything that one could need, but he still preferred the luxury of the Tower.

The atmosphere was different since the last time he'd been here. Tony couldn't name what it was, but something had _changed_. The compound still looked the same, and there weren't any new additions to the team. Everyone looked the same since the last time he'd seen them and besides Wilson locking Barnes into the pantry last week, there hadn't been any incidents.

What was it? Something had changed, he just knew it, but _what_ was it? He had to figure it out during his stay or otherwise he was going to lose his mind! And it didn't help that the others seemed to be oblivious that something was different! Maybe it was something that was just noticeable to an outsider?

The only thing that he'd noticed was that Maximoff seemed to have warmed up and finally felt like she belonged here with the others. His relationship with her was... _complicated_ , but she had been through so much and deserved to find a place for herself. It was quite obvious that she looked up to Natasha and had a crush on Vision which Tony thought was adorable since Vision was clueless even though he seemed to like her back.

He watched the others train and noticed that Natasha and Maximoff left the gym before the others. Vision just hovered away, but the other men were just waiting around,

"Why aren't you showering?" He asked when they came closer to them.

Rhodey rolled his eyes. "We're not going to be in the shower room when there's a 19 year old girl, Tony!"

"Huh?"

Steve sighed. "We don't want to make Wanda uncomfortable. You know, she doesn't want four grown men to see her in a towel when she goes to the shower. She's not like Nat."

"I haven't thought about that when I designed the place." He admitted. "It's not like you're showering together, though. There's a stall for everyone! You're not gonna see her naked or vice versa."

"And that's why there were so many sexual harassment complaints when you were at SI." Rhodey shook his head.

"I'll think off something." He promised. He'd never thought that something like that could be a problem. Romanoff didn't care and he honestly would have never thought that they would have a young girl, a _teenager_ , on the team. Okay, he could understand that it would make Maximoff uncomfortable if older men saw her like that, even though he knew that at least Steve and Rhodey would look away.

He made a few jokes after dinner when it was just the boys because Natasha and Maximoff wanted to go to the movies and noticed that Steve wasn't so tense anymore when his jokes had a sexual innuendo because Rogers had usually told him to knock it off or he hadn't understood the double meaning. But now Steve was mostly ignoring it and he didn't even blush anymore.

Hm... And then it dawned on him. Steve had finally done it! He wasn't a virgin anymore! Holy shit! Was that why the atmosphere was different? But would Steve losing his virginity really impact everything around here?

No, not really. There had to be more. Tony watched Steve during the evening, wondering what else was there. He had to have lost his virginity to someone here at the compound. He didn't think that Steve was gay or bi, so that ruled out the guys on the team. It had to be someone on the team or maybe someone that worked closely with them. He couldn't picture Rogers with someone who would be with a civilian.

Hill? No.

Cho? No.

That only really left Maximoff and - _oh God!_ Steve and _Natasha_ were banging! Holy shit, that had to be it! They were boning and, of course, the change in their relationship changed the dynamic of the team! Oh God, why hadn't he realized that sooner! Were they just hooking up or were they are real couple? Did the others know about this?

Friday announced in that moment that Maximoff and Natasha had come back from their trip into the town and Steve immediately sat up straight like he had been waiting for it all evening. Of course he had. Cap was waiting to get laid!

Steve yawned in that moment. Funny, Tony assumed that only combat could exhaust Captain America. "I'm tired. I'm heading to bed."

Tony barely managed to swallow his tongue, he almost asked _which_ bed he was heading to. Oh God, he didn't want to picture these two in bed. Yuck!

"Mm-hm." Barnes nodded, looking slightly amused. Did the others know as well? "Goodnight, _sweet_ dreams."

Steve looked confused for a second, but then he got up, wishing everyone a goodnight, and left the room. And he was going to Natasha's or his own to...Tony shook his head. That was almost as worse as picturing your own parents doing it.

* * *

 _Rhodey_

Rhodey was a firm believer of minding his own business and he did not get involved in his teammates, friends', private lives, not that they were messy. No, compared to Tony's mess, living here was basically a vacation aside from the avenging part. He didn't really care about what the others did in their free time when it didn't involve him. He was older than the others (okay, technically Barnes and Rogers were the oldest) and he had other interests. He was even thinking about moving out of the compound so he could have a life outside the Avengers Initiative, it seemed like a healthy thing to do.

Even though he stayed out of most of the things that happened at the compound, he knew two things. The first was that Barnes and Wilson only pretended to hate each other, and the second was that Rogers and Romanoff were more than just partners and friends. They both kept their person life out of Avengers business so he didn't really care about that. But they did seem happier and he respected their decision not to announce their relationship to the others.

* * *

 _Wanda_

Living in America without Pietro was...not easy. She always discovered things that she knew her brother would like, but he wasn't here to see them. She missed him and she knew that she always would. But she was grateful that she had found a new place. She had new friends and a purpose in her life and for now that was more than she could ask for. She just wished that Pietro was by her side.

She liked Natasha the best out of her new teammates. Maybe it was because she was the only other woman on the team or it was because she was also from another country and Wanda had been more than surprised when Natasha revealed that she spoke Sokovian. Or maybe it was because Natasha had gone through something familiar and that was something that they shared. She knew that Natasha didn't think she was a good person, but Wanda could _literally_ see her true self and Natasha was a good person. She was kind, understanding and helping people was all she wanted to do.

Wanda decided early on that Natasha would be her role model. She'd gone through so much and come out of the other side and that gave Wanda hope.

And she also loved the fact that Natasha had a boyfriend, at least Wanda was pretty sure that Steve was her boyfriend and not just her...bed mate. Maybe one day Wanda would have a boyfriend as well. She didn't know if the others knew about Steve and Natasha since they didn't show any PDA or had announced that they were in love. Wanda only knew because she could feel their intense love for each other whenever they were in the same room.

Steve's love for Natasha was warm and patient, Natasha's love for Steve was quiet, but fierce and passionate. Wanda knew that Natasha was always surprised by how much she loved Steve. She could feel that Natasha had thought that she had been incapable of that kind of love. Natasha was sometimes fighting her feelings for Steve, thinking that he deserved better, but Steve was so sure that he and Natasha were meant for each other that it made Wanda almost jealous. How wonderful it had to be to have someone that believed in you and your relationship _that much_.

* * *

 _Clint_

Of course he knew that Natasha was banging Steve. He knew her better than anyone, he had always known that Natasha had a soft spot for Cap and that it was only a matter of time until she would give into her feelings for him. Even when that whole Bruce thing had gone down; he'd always known that Natasha would listen to her heart one day and be with Steve. She never said anything about him to Clint, but he knew that she loved Steve. And he was glad that it was Steve who she had given her heart and not some other guy. Natasha was very special and she deserved someone who truly loved her and would always be good to her.

He could see how happy she was with him, even though it wasn't very obvious. No, it were the little things that showed Clint that Natasha was with Steve and that he made her happy. She smiled more, she hummed a little from time to time and her hair was in her natural state. And that alone showed Clint that Natasha had finally found herself, thanks to Steve. She'd always changed her hair regularly, but for the last six months her hair was a dark red with wavy curls that Laura said no styling tool could accomplish (apparently she'd tried, but to Clint her hair was perfect).

Clint was waiting for the day when Natasha would officially tell him that she was with Steve and he could tease her a little bit. He knew of course, that she knew that he knew, but he wouldn't say anything until she told him about her relationship.

And he was dying to give Steve a shovel talk to see how he would react to that. And apparently Laura was dying to ask Natasha how Captain America was in the bedroom. Something that Clint _really_ didn't need to know. He liked to live with the image that Nat kissed Steve's cheek and then they just went to sleep.

* * *

 _Bruce_

He'd had been more than flattered when Natasha had shown interest in him, even though he had been very, _very_ , surprised. He would have never believed that he was her type nor that she was even interested in starting something with a team member. And Bruce had always thought that there was _something_ between her and Steve when he saw them together. He had known that they had worked together before Shield had fallen and Natasha always had a little smile on her face when someone mentioned Steve. And he didn't miss how weird Rogers had acted when Natasha had flirted with Bruce during that party before Ultron happened. And then everything had gone to hell and Bruce, or rather the Hulk, disappeared. He knew that Natasha wasn't really into him, he had felt it when she kissed him before she pushed him off that cliff. And he was sure that she had known it too. But it had been nice to think that such a beautiful and charming woman could be interested in a man like him.

And he would be lying if he hadn't hoped a little bit that maybe things would be different when he returned. Maybe Natasha finally knew what she wanted and maybe they could try to see where this thing could go with them. But he also wasn't delusional, he had been gone for over two years and he had always known that her attraction to him wasn't really about him.

But once he was at the compound and everyone welcomed him back, he could see that Natasha wasn't interested in him. She treated him kindly and like a friend, but there was nothing more. Steve, however, was a different story. He tried to be nice, but he was tense and his gaze always flickered back to Natasha, like he was trying to watch her reactions. Steve was jealous. Of _him_. Bruce would have never thought that Captain America would be jealous of him. He didn't know if he and Natasha were together, but he was more than certain that Steve had feelings for her.

Bruce wasn't an official member of the team, but he stayed at the compound to do some research to figure out if he could get better control over the Hulk, and he used his breaks to watch Natasha and Steve. He'd talked to Natasha and they both agreed that they were better off as friends and Natasha even apologized for her behavior and explained that she had been going through something and this had been her way of dealing with it. She hadn't told him what it was that she had been going through, but he was pretty sure that it had something to do with Steve.

Natasha and Steve were _always_ together. Training the new team together, working for hours in one of their offices and they were always standing next to each other. Bruce had been surprised when he had seen that Tony ( after Steve'd asked him to) added magnets to Nat's suit so that she could use Cap's shield as well.

He _knew_ that they were together when the team had gone back from a mission and Natasha had refused to get checked in medical. She said that she was fine and just left the room. Bruce passed by the medical wing a few hours later and saw that Steve and Natasha were in one of the examination rooms. Steve was checking her body for wounds with a dark face. Bruce figured that she had been indeed hurt and he was correct when Steve very gently wrapped bandages around Natasha's rips.

He said something to her that Bruce couldn't hear and she cupped his face, smiling softly at him. Steve shook his head before he kissed her. Bruce had already suspected that they were a thing, but seeing him it with his own eyes was still...weird. He wasn't in love with Natasha, but he couldn't help but feel jealous. Not really because Steve was with her, but rather, because Bruce knew that he couldn't have what they had. He couldn't be with someone. He knew that and Natasha had known that as well. And that was why she had flirted with him, she had known that it would have gone nowhere. Bruce wondered if Natasha had already known that she had feelings for Steve back then and that was why she had been after him.

He only realized that he was still watching them when Natasha got Steve out of his shirt and laid down onto the gurney, pulling Steve on top of her. He should really get out of here before he saw anything else.

He wasn't mad at Natasha. No, and he also didn't feel used. She was a good person and she deserved someone like Steve. Steve could give her everything she wanted and he would always be good for her. And Steve also deserved a win. He was happy for his friends.

* * *

 _Bucky_

Of course he knew that Steve was in love with Natasha. Even the Winter Soldier had known that Rogers had feelings for Romanoff. Bucky had felt it in Steve's punches and hits when he'd attacked him after shooting Natasha. There had been so much rage and anger, that it could have only been love. Bucky was ashamed and he would never tell Steve this, but the Winter Soldier had originally planned to take Romanoff hostage to make Rogers let Operation Insight happen. Bucky was just glad that Romanoff had been in disguise when he had roamed through the Triskelion before he had been ordered to stop Wilson and Rogers to get onto the helicarriers, because he knew that things could have gone very ugly if he had taken Natasha.

He had known that Steve and Wilson were looking for him. And sometimes Natasha had been with them. He had watched them one night, because Bucky had just wanted to see Steve from afar to make sure that the punk was alright. His mind had still been fuzzy and he hadn't been ready to face his best friend, but he wanted to make sure that he was okay. He'd followed Steve and Natasha through the streets of Prague and had smiled when he'd seen how Steve had shyly taking Natasha's hand into his own. She'd looked up at him in surprise, but hadn't pulled her hand away. They'd walked hand in hand towards the river and he'd left them alone, not wanting to intrude such a personal moment.

He had let Steve find him a couple of months later in Romania and together they'd stayed in a small house since he hadn't been ready to go back to the States just yet. Natasha had just showed up one day, telling them that everything had been dealt with and he could just go back without having to fear imprisonment or something worse.

He had seen that Steve had been happy that Natasha had come, but there had been no signs that they had been romantically involved. Steve hadn't even mentioned Natasha once, even though that hadn't been surprising. Bucky had gone early to bed so that the two could catch up and he'd later had to realize that tiny, old houses in Romania had paper thin walls and he had heard _everything._ He had tried to tune the noises out, put his pillow over his face, but he'd still heard them. Natasha had been gone the next morning, but Steve still had been in a _very good_ mood. Of course he had been. The punk had gotten laid. Multiple times.

Bucky had been _more_ than relieved when he had been told that he would have his own quarters at the compound and that Stark had _soundproofed_ everything.

They still hadn't said anything about them being a couple, but Bucky knew that the rest of the team knew as well that their team leaders were a couple. And he could see how fucking happy Steve was and that was the only thing that mattered to him.

He was watching TV when Friday informed him that Steve was standing in front of his apartment. He turned the TV off and told the AI to let his best friend in. Steve looked nervous for some reason.

"What's wrong?"

"Uh, nothing." Steve came closer, rubbing the back of his neck. "Uh...um...no one knows this and...and you have to keep it to yourself...um, Nat and I...we're together..."

Bucky fought really hard not to grin. "Oh, really?"

"Uh, yeah and I..." He pulled his phone out of his pocket. "I need your help with something." Steve almost shoved the phone into Bucky's face. Jesus, the punk was really nervous. Bucky looked at the screen to find out what Steve wanted him to show. He blinked a few times. He was looking at _diamond rings_. "Which one do you thing is the right one for Nat?"

He looked from the phone to Steve. "Are you planning to propose?"

His best friend blushed a little, but his eyes were shining brightly. He just looked so goddamn happy and in love in that moment. "Yeah. Yeah, I am."


	84. Public Relations (AU)

_AU Natasha Romanoff is the best at PR, but pretty stupid when it comes to her client Steve Rogers._

* * *

Natasha was proud of her job and she was damn good at it. She'd started working for Pepper Potts' PR firm right after she'd graduated and she was Pepper's best publicist. She could fix anything, no scandal was too big for her to handle, and her clients worshiped her. They knew that she could make or break their careers and that they would be lost without her. Natasha wasn't a judgmental person, she didn't care if her famous clients cheated on their partners or did drugs. She just made sure that their _activities_ didn't ruin their careers.

She took care of actors, singers, and athletes. And she took care of Steve Rogers' public image who was an artist and not your typical celebrity. Steve was her easiest client by far. No scandals, nothing. Sometimes she wondered why he'd even hired Potts Public Relations since his image was perfect. He had just told them that he didn't want to deal with this part of his job and that he gladly paid someone else to pay attention to his public image. And the public _loved_ him. He was a former army captain who paid for his mother's chemo and who adopted a shelter dog. His sketches and paintings were sold for so much money that he could donate half of it and still afford a house in Brooklyn and one for his mother in the Hamptons. He was the perfect client and the only thing she had to do was to supervise his schedule and to make him go to some of the parties people threw for him.

She'd just booked an appearance for one of her other clients on Ellen after he'd tweeted something dumb on Twitter so he could apologize and do one of Ellen's games to raise money for a charity.

Her phone buzzed and she picked it up to check who'd texted her. It was a text from Rogers.

 _Hey. You wanna come over tonight? I got your favorite wine and Dodger misses you. And so do I :*_

Yeah, she was also having an affair with him. She knew that it was more than unprofessional and that it could get her fired, but she couldn't quit him. He was so different from anyone in the business and even though he wasn't really her usual type, she wanted him so goddamn much.

She texted him back that she was on her way and left her office. She didn't really know how she ended up sleeping with him. She had a rule that she would never sleep with a client and she knew that Pepper wouldn't let her get away with it if she did. And it hadn't been tough for her to live by that promise, she had _never_ been attracted to one of her clients. But then Steve Rogers had walked into her office and she'd pretty much wanted to jump him right there. A few weeks later, he'd invited her to his art studio and she should have known how the evening was going to end, but she'd gone anyway. He'd shown her a few pieces that he was working on and then one thing led to another and they'd had sex on his plotting table. She had bolted pretty much right after they'd finished, swearing to herself that this had been a one time thing. That promise had lasted 18 hours until she'd run into him outside of her apartment building and she'd taken him upstairs where they hadn't even made it to her bedroom.

She heard Dodger barking when she knocked on Steve's front door and he opened it seconds later. His dog greeted her happily and Steve gave her a deep kiss since they hadn't seen each other for a couple of days.

"Hi." He smiled and let her in.

"Hey." She grinned back and stepped into his house. His dog was dancing around them until he lost interest and decided to jump onto the couch. Steve had already laid out a tee for her and she stepped out of her business outfit and heels and slipped his shirt on. She met him in the kitchen where he was finishing dinner for them. The table was set and he'd already filled her glass with wine. She smiled a thank you to him and sat down.

His pasta tasted amazing and they talked about their jobs. She usually told Steve more than she should about her work, but she never said any names and she doubted that he could guess about which stars she was talking about. He just didn't care about celebrities. He told her in return about the new painting that he was working on and asked her if she didn't want to come by tomorrow to see it. He asked her with a glint in his eyes and they both knew that they wouldn't just take a look at his painting tomorrow.

She helped him with the dishes and he told her to go upstairs while he was getting Dodger ready for the night. She walked to his bedroom, got out of his shirt, and waited naked for him on his bed. He seemed to like that surprise, judging by the way he licked his lips, and then joined her in bed to satisfy all her needs.

She was still trying to catch her breath and it sounded like Steve was doing the same. Boy, he really knew how to treat a girl. She was relaxed and boneless, and she just wanted to sleep, but she had to leave this nice bed to get home. She groaned and sat up, Steve had really worn her out tonight.

He moved behind her and trailed soft kisses onto her back. "You know-" He murmured against her skin. "You can have a drawer or two so you can leave a few of your things here and you wouldn't have to leave. You can spend the night here."

That sounded like something that people did who _dated_ and not two people who just fucked. "It's okay. My place is closer to work than yours and I hate commuting."

"Okay. It was just a thought." He let out a disappointed sigh and pressed one last kiss on her back. She turned around to kiss him on the lips before she slipped out of bed.

She was just glad that Steve hadn't mentioned visiting his mother in the Hamptons again. Who wants to introduce their affair to their mother? Steve was sometimes really weird.

* * *

"When will I meet your boyfriend?" Her best friend Laura asked over drinks. Her husband Clint was watching their kids and Laura had an evening to herself. She loved her niece and nephews dearly, but Natasha missed the times where she and Laura had been partying the whole night.

"My what?" She asked, perplexed. She hadn't told anyone about Steve and he was definitely not her _boyfriend_. She didn't do boyfriends.

Laura raised an eyebrow at her. "I know you're seeing someone. You're not as sneaky as you think, Nat."

"I'm not seeing anyone. We're just having sex. Nothing more."

"Uh-huh." Laura didn't look convinced. "The sex must be great then, because you seen happier. If I had to guess, you've been _just having sex_ with that guy for five months."

Her eyes widened in surprise. Laura was right.

Her friend just grinned. "Would having a boyfriend really be that bad? He seems to make you happy. _Really_ happy."

"You know that I'm not the type for that. We're just having fun."

"So you'd be okay with it if he would be having fun with someone else?"

 _No. "_ Of course."

Laura laughed. "You used to be better at lying."

Her friend decided to go home before it was even midnight, and Natasha decided that it was time for a booty call. She was already in front of his house when she called him and Steve let her immediately in. He asked her if she wanted anything to drink or to eat, but she didn't want anything like that. She just wanted _him_. The thought of him doing this with someone else made her way more jealous that she would ever admit and she pushed him onto the couch to have her way with him.

She was too tired to go home and accepted Steve's offer to stay the night. She borrowed a shirt after her shower and crawled under the sheets. Steve joined her shortly after and pulled her against his chest.

"The exhibit is next week, right?" He asked, his hand running through her hair.

"Mm." She mumbled against his pec. The man was really built.

"You wanna be my date?"

She raised her head to look at him. "You know, I can't. You're my client."

He sighed and she knew that he was disappointed. "You can just be my plus one."

" _Steve_ -"

"Yeah, I know." He pressed a kiss onto the top of her head. "Go to sleep. Goodnight."

* * *

She did decide to go to the party in the end, but not as his plus one, and _definitely_ not as his date. They weren't dating, they _couldn't_ be dating or she would lose her job, and she didn't want to date. She just wasn't the kind of person who wanted a relationship. She liked what she had with Steve. The sex was great and she liked working with him, and that was it.

She chose a dress that showed off her figure and paired it with high heels that made her legs look extra long and sexy. She wanted to look good tonight, hoping the night would end for her in Steve's bed. They hadn't seen each other since she'd showed up for that booty call last week and she missed him, _no_ , what she was that she missed his body. She missed his body!

Half of New York City's high society was at the art gallery to have a first glimpse at Steve's new exhibit and she was certain that a lot of money would be collected for the charities that Steve supported.

She spotted talking Steve to Pepper and her fiance Tony Stark, who was a former client and Pepper had only agreed to go out with him after he'd hired another PR firm. Natasha decided not to talk to Steve in Pepper's presence and went to the bar instead, ordering a martini.

She made the rounds with her martini in her hand, taking in Steve's new work. She had seen a few pieces, but not everything, and she was curious what he had created. He truly was talented and she was proud of how far he'd come as an artist.

Natasha almost choked when she saw one of the pieces that she hadn't seen before. And now she knew why Steve hadn't shown it to her. It was a charcoal portrait of a woman, she was shown from behind, but Natasha knew that _she_ was the woman. Her wavy hair was in a messy bun on top of her head and her too big shirt exposed one of her shoulders. This was a look that Steve had seen many times before and he just decided to draw it? To show it to the world? What if someone asked who that woman was? Steve was a terrible liar and she didn't want to lose her job just because of some guy she was banging! What the fuck had he been thinking? This could ruin her career! She was so fucking angry! But she had to swallow that anger, because she couldn't make a scene here, even though she loved to tell Steve to fuck off right now.

Looking around, she found Steve talking to some friends, and she quickly walked over to Pepper, telling her that she wasn't feeling so well and decided to go home. Her boss seemed surprised, but wished her to get better and to take the day off tomorrow if she wasn't feeling better by then. She thanked Pepper and walked to the exit, her eyes meeting Steve's for a second and he looked confused and a bit hurt that she was leaving, but she honestly didn't give a fuck. What gave him the right to exhibit a fucking drawing of her?!

She took a cab home, ignoring Steve's texts asking her why she'd left so early and if she was okay. Did he really think she was okay with him doing this? She hadn't even known that he'd drawn her! Were there even more pieces just waiting to be put on display?!

She paid the driver and got into her apartment building. The concierge stopped her before she reached the elevators, informing her that something got delivered for her. She accepted the small package and went into the elevator. She couldn't remember ordering anything and anything work related got sent to her office.

She kicked off her high heels, when she was inside her apartment and went into the kitchen to get a knife to open the package. A card was on top of a black box. She opened the card to read it.

 _You are my muse. Without you, there wouldn't be an exhibit. Thank you, Nat. I hope you wear them tonight._

The package had obviously arrived after she'd left for the party. She shook her head. Just because she was apparently his muse, that didn't give him the right to draw her! She opened the box and couldn't help but gasp. Steve had given her beautiful teardrop diamond earrings. And the stones weren't exactly tiny, so the earrings had to be very expensive.

Why was he drawing her and buying her expensive jewelry? They were just co-workers and sleeping together, none of this made any sense!

She changed into more comfortable clothes and sat down on her couch with a glass of wine, the earrings on her coffee table almost mocking her. Had it been a mistake to start something with Steve? Things were starting to get too serious for just a casual fling. Would she lose Steve as a client if she stopped sleeping with him? Maybe there was a reason why one shouldn't get involved with clients. Natasha groaned, realizing that she had created a giant mess.

A knock on her door startled her and she checked the time. It was way after 11 pm, who was it?

There was another knock on the door. "It's me." She heard Steve's voice from the other side of the door.

 _Great!_ Of course he would show up here. She sighed and stood up to let him in.

He held up a paper bag with the logo of her favorite bakery. How did he know about that? Had she told him? "Pepper told me that you weren't feeling so well, so I thought I come by to check on you. I come bearing cupcakes." He smiled softly and this gesture made her feel all tingly.

She stepped aside to let him in. "Thanks. You didn't have to come by." He looked at her like she'd said the wrong thing. "Uh, and thanks for the earrings. That wasn't necessary."

"Do you like them?" He asked with a hopeful smile.

"Yeah, they're beautiful. Thank you."

His smile grew wider and he put the paper back on her coffee table next to the earrings. "So my mom's coming into the city tomorrow to see the exhibit. Are you free tomorrow for lunch?"

She blinked at him in confusion. "You want me to meet your mother?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Because I want my mom to meet my girlfriend." He said like it was the most logical thing in the world.

 _God_ , he thought that they were an actual couple. That was why he'd given her those earrings, why he'd drawn that portrait, why he'd showed up with cupcakes at her door, thinking that she was unwell. God, she was such a fucking moron. He'd thought this whole time that she was his girlfriend. _Shit_.

" _Steve_ -"

His face fell and she felt like she'd kicked a puppy. " _Oh_. I take it that you're not my girlfriend then." He looked to the ground. "So this was just sex for you." God, he looked really hurt and _she_ was the reason. She hated herself in that moment. "Do you fuck all your clients?"

"What?!"

"I'm sorry, that was out of line. I guess... I'm...just hurt and angry...I thought this was going somewhere." He walked past by her and she wanted to stop him, but she didn't know what to say. "I... have to go. I...I'll ask Pepper for a new publicist. Don't worry, I won't tell her why." He looked over his shoulder, but wasn't meeting her gaze. "I...Take care." He opened the door and just left.

Natasha could only stare at the closed door. She felt _terrible_. For hurting Steve, and the thought of not having him in her life anymore... was just too much. She didn't really know what he truly meant to her, what it would mean for her job, and if she was even capable of being someone's girlfriend, but she couldn't lose him. No, that thought hurt more than she'd realized it would. She opened the door and ran into the hallway. Steve had already reached the elevators.

"Steve, wait!"


	85. Public Relations II (AU)

_Second part of Public Relations._

* * *

"Steve, wait!"

She ran after him and thankfully Steve didn't get into the open elevator, but he still looked guarded.

"What?"

She stopped in front of him and took a deep breath to collect herself. It didn't happen often that she was in a situation that was foreign to her. "I...I've never...Look, I'm not good at this, but I can't bear the thought of not having you in my life. This is all new to me." She admitted quietly. "I've never had a real boyfriend before, Steve."

He sighed heavily. "I can't just have sex with you anymore. I want _more_. Is that something that _you_ want?"

"I think I do." She whispered. "I might be really bad at it though."

Steve smiled a little. "What? There's something that you're not good at?" His expression turned serious again. "Are you sure that this is what you want, because five seconds ago you had a different opinion."

She had to be honest with him. "I thought that it was what I wanted, but I think I was in denial. This-" She gestured between him and her. "This has been more than just sex for some time now and I tried to ignore it. I never had a real relationship and I could lose my job over this."

His face softened. "I can let someone else do my PR. I just want to be with you, Nat." He smiled. "I should have talked with you about that and not just assumed things. And I get if you're not ready to meet my ma."

"Does she know about me?"

Steve took her hand and laced their fingers together, making her feel all warm and fuzzy. "Of course. She noticed months ago that I seem happier."

Hadn't Laura said the same thing to her? Steve did make her happy and she liked eating dinner and just talking to him almost more than having sex with him and he was incredible in bed. "Do you want to stay the night?"

He smiled. "I've never done that before."

"I think it's time." She said and led him back to her apartment. "And I think I want to meet your mom for lunch tomorrow." She said, looking up at him, and his smile almost blinded her. She could do this. She could meet his mother, that was something that couple did, wasn't it?

* * *

To say that Natasha was nervous to meet Steve's mother was putting it lightly. She wasn't even used to the fact that she had a boyfriend now, let alone that she was meeting her boyfriend's _mother_ , but she had put Steve through so much that she had to do it. Their relationship had to move forward and meeting the parents was a logical step.

She had left work earlier so she would be punctual, she didn't want to come too late to lunch. She had chosen a modest dress in a light blue to appear soft and friendly, she had spent quiet some time this morning to pick an outfit. She didn't want his mother to think that she was some kind of vamp. God, when had she started to care what other people thought about her?

She picked up flowers on her way to Steve's house and took a deep breath before she knocked on the door. She heard Dodger barking and Steve opened the door a few seconds later.

"Hi." He beamed at her and pecked her lips. "These for me?" He teased, pointing at the flowers.

"No." She laughed, shaking her head. "They are for your mother."

"That was very thoughtful of you." He praised and squeezed her hand. They had talked last night about the fact that she was very inexperienced when it came to real, adult relationships and Steve promised to be patient with her while she promised not to try to shut him out. "My mom's on the patio."

"Okay."

He smiled. "Don't be nervous. She's gonna love you." He gave her hand another squeeze before he laced their fingers together and led her to the patio. She was glad that he didn't mention that her hands were a little bit sweaty. She had never met any parents before, okay? She was nervous!

Steve's mother was a small and elegant woman. Her hair was still blonde and she was just beautiful. She had that kind of beauty that only intensified over the years, and she had the same eyes as her son. She smiled brightly at Natasha and she suddenly didn't feel so nervous anymore. Steve's mother had that smile that made feel people warm and safe. Steve's smile was the same.

"You must be Natasha!" Mrs. Rogers walked towards her and hugged her. "It's so nice to finally meet you. Steve has told me so much about you!"

"Uh, hi! It's really nice to meet you, Mrs. Rogers." She answered, handing her the flowers.

"Thank you." She accepted the flowers. "And please call me Sarah, dear." Natasha could only nod while Sarah looped her arm around hers and led her to the table on the patio. "I'm so glad that Steve has finally found someone again. He's been alone for too long."

"I'm really glad he's in my life." She said truthfully and she didn't know what else to say. Sarah sounded so happy that Steve wasn't single anymore. Well, she figured that mothers wanted their children not to be alone. Not that Natasha knew anything about what mothers wanted since her own had passed away when she had been a child.

"So tell me about yourself." Sarah said with a smile and sat down opposite from her at the table. Steve sat down next to Natasha and squeezed her knee briefly under the table. She looked at him, her heart fluttering a little when she saw how soft his gaze was. Sarah was grinning knowingly when Natasha focused back on her.

Sarah Rogers was a wonderful woman and Natasha realized that she was a big reason why Steve was such a kind and great man. She couldn't help but feel welcomed and comfortable in Sarah's presence.

Steve walked her to the door after lunch and Sarah's warm hug, inviting her to come up to the Hamptons.

"Was this okay for you?" Steve asked carefully when they reached the door. "It wasn't too much too soon?"

"No. Your mom's great. I'm glad I met her today." She said with a smile and Steve visibly relaxed. "And I wouldn't say no if we spent a weekend in the Hamptons."

"Yeah?"

She nodded. "Yes. I feel very comfortable around your mother."

"She likes you, too." Steve cupped her face. "She really does, I can tell."

* * *

Natasha had to fly to LA and stay there for a week to fix the mess that one of her clients had created. She knew that she was biased but Steve was really her favorite client, because he'd never caused her any trouble (beside the fact that she shouldn't be dating him).

Justin Hammer was a dick and Natasha wanted to drown him in the Pacific Ocean more than once, but he'd paid a lot of money for the firm's service so she kept her mouth shut and dealt with the scandal. She just didn't understand why he was still married if he seemed to prefer to sleep with women who _weren't_ his wife. She was just thankful that Steve would never do something like this to her.

Her phone pinged with a Google alert about Steve when she was on her way from the airport to Steve's place. She opened the article and panicked for a second. Christine Everhart had written a gossip piece wondering who Steve Rogers was seeing after he'd rejected her at an event, telling her that he wasn't single.

 _Shit_.

Natasha wouldn't be surprised if Pepper would text her soon to tell her to get onto that. She had been so excited to see Steve again and now this happened. She wasn't mad that he'd told Christine that he was with someone, maybe women would stop hitting on him now, but people would want to know _who_ he was dating.

She got out of the cab and walked up the few stairs to Steve's front door. She wasn't going to think about this. She wanted to spend a romantic evening with her boyfriend after being away for a week. She thought that this was something couples did, at least this was something that she wanted to do and it didn't even freak her out.

She knocked on his door and Steve opened it a few seconds later. "Hey!" He smiled brightly at her before he pulled into a hug. "I missed you!"

"I...I missed you, too." She admitted and breathed in his scent. She loved his smell.

He kissed her forehead before he pressed a soft kiss to her lips. "Come in. Dinner is almost ready, sweetheart." He took her suitcase and rolled it into his hallway. She followed him and was greeted by a happy Dodger. She patted his head and scratched him under his chin before she followed Steve into the kitchen.

He went to the oven to check on their food and she was pretty sure that he'd made lasagna for them. She walked behind him and wrapped her arms around him when he'd closed the oven. His hand covered hers on his stomach before he turned around in her embrace.

"Hi." He smiled and kissed her.

"Hey." She whispered back and kissed him again. "It's good to be back. Work has been a bitch. Well, Justin Hammer is a bitch."

He laughed, wrapping his arms around her. "So, dinner is ready in half an hour. You have any idea what we can do until then?"

"I think I do." She smirked, her hands moving to his ass. "And I think you'll like it, too."

* * *

She didn't want to go to work today, but she knew that she had to. Natasha would tell Pepper about her relationship with Steve today, hoping that Pepper wouldn't fire her and just make Steve the client of one of her co-workers. She didn't want to tell her boss _and_ friend that she had broken the golden rule, but she had to before anyone found out that _Natasha_ was Steve's girlfriend and Pepper would read it on a gossip blog.

Pepper was already in her office when Natasha came to work and she waited until her boss was done with her business call.

"Come in." Pepper called and Natasha walked into the office, closing the door behind her so no one could listen in. "How are you?"

"Good. I'm good. And you?" She sat down, feeling nervous. She had lied to Pepper for the last five months and she felt terrible.

"I'm great." Pepper smiled brightly. "We agreed on a date for the wedding. Keep the second weekend next March free." She took a sip from her latte. "But I don't think that's what you want to talk right now. What's up?"

Natasha took a deep breath. "You've heard that Rogers is seeing someone?"

Pepper nodded. "Yeah. Do we know who? Is she kosher or do we have to deal with skeletons in the closet?"

"Uh, well." Natasha cleared her throat. "That depends on how you look at it... It's me. I'm the girlfriend."

Pepper just looked at her and she felt uneasy because she had no idea what was going through her friend's head. "I see. How long?"

"Five months." Natasha looked at the ground. "I know that we're not supposed to get involved with clients and I never thought I would break that rule...I care a lot about him. And Steve agreed to a new publicist."

"Do you love him?" Pepper asked softly and Natasha was surprised. At Pepper's tone and the question itself, because Natasha hadn't thought about that. Did she love him? Had she ever loved someone like that? Steve was special to her and she thought about him all the time and she wanted to spend every minute with him, but was that _love_?

"I don't know. He's...very important to me. He's not just some fling." She answered quietly. "I never felt like this before."

Pepper smiled. "I'm happy for you. And for Steve. I think you two can be good together. And yes, you two can't work together anymore. It's unprofessional." And there it was. Would Pepper fire her now? "But I'm not firing you, if that's what you're afraid of. Would be a bit hypocritical of me since I'm getting married to an ex-client."

Natasha sighed in relief. "Thank you, Pepper! I was really worried that you would fire me. What I did was unprofessional and I should have told you about it sooner. I'm sorry."

"Yes, you should have." Pepper agreed and Natasha felt bad. "But I also know you, and you probably had problems to admit your relationship to yourself."

"Well...you might have a point there." Natasha said, grimacing slightly.

"See, I know you!" Pepper laughed. "So I take it that portrait of the unknown woman is you?" Natasha nodded. "It's beautiful and he really captured your essence."

"Thanks?"

Pepper grinned. "I think we should have a double date soon. I'd love to get to know Steve as your boyfriend."

Woah, double dates. Well, that was something that couples did, wasn't it? "Sounds..great!"

* * *

Natasha didn't have to ask Steve to know how happy he was right now. They were on their way to the Hamptons to spend the weekend at his mother's house. She and Sarah had exchanged numbers and were texting regularly. And Steve was getting along quite well with his new publicist Sam Wilson with them both being veterans and dog lovers. And Natasha was excited to start her new job. It hadn't been easy to leave Pepper Potts PR, but she hadn't been able to say no when Tony Stark offered her to run his charity. She already had so many ideas and she was looking forward to a change in her career. She hadn't really realized it before, but she was tired of dealing with arrogant stars who thought they were the center of the universe.

"We're here, sweetheart." Steve said softly, interrupting her train of thoughts. She looked at the house and was amazed. It was truly beautiful and right by the beach, she couldn't wait to swim in the ocean!

"It's beautiful."

Steve nodded. "Yeah. Ma's really proud of it."

"She should be." She cupped his face and pecked his lips. "And you're such an amazing man for buying this house for her."

"I wouldn't have my career without her. I wouldn't be the man that I am without her."

She smiled softly. "I know."

They got out of the car and Sarah was already coming towards them. "Hello!" She hugged Steve and then Natasha. "It's so great that you're here!"

"Thank you for inviting me!" Natasha said politely.

Sarah gave her a warm smile. "I'm not inviting you, dear! You can come by any time. With or without Steve. You're not a guest, you're family!"

"Thank you!" She said with warm cheeks. It should freak her out, but it didn't. Not anymore. She knew now what she wanted and what she felt. She loved Steve and she wanted to be with him for as long as he would have her. Sarah wrapped her arm around Natasha's shoulder. "And don't worry. I sleep like the dead and I wear earplugs, so you kids can be as loud as you want!"

" _Ma_!"


	86. The Breakup

_Steve and Natasha broke up and they won't say why._

* * *

"Are you ever gonna tell me what happened, Tasha?" Clint asked his best friend while they were sitting outside on the porch of the farmhouse, drinking Laura's moonshine.

"We broke up." She said and took another sip from her mason jaw. "There's nothing else to say."

Natasha had showed up three days ago at their door step, announcing that she was single again, and walked straight to the the guestroom where she hadn't come out of until the next day. And then she was acting completely normal again, like she hadn't told him that her and Steve were over.

"Why did you break up?" He asked again for what felt like the hundredth time.

She shrugged her shoulders. "Doesn't matter. It's over. It's better this way." She gulped the rest of her moonshine down and stood up. "I'll go to bed. I think I'll head back to New York after breakfast tomorrow. Goodnight, Clint."

"You can talk to me. You know that right?" He said softly.

She looked briefly hurt, but it was gone as soon as he spotted it. "There's nothing to talk about. But thanks, Barton." She squeezed his shoulder before she walked inside.

He just didn't get it. Why had they broken up? They had been so happy together. Steve worshiped the ground Natasha walked on, and Natasha had finally opened up more. Clint knew that Natasha loved Steve and he couldn't imagine that she would just fall out of love with him over night. It just didn't make any sense. They were perfect for each other and Clint had actually thought that they would be together for the rest of their lives. What had happened between them?!

x-x-x-x-x

"You wanna talk about it, punk?" Bucky asked again and handed Steve another beer. His best friend had barely been talking since he'd called him yesterday telling him that he and Natasha were history.

"No." He simply said, accepting the beer.

"Talking about it could help."

Steve just shook his head. "It's over. And we're not getting back. I don't see how anything could he helpful right now."

The bitterness in Steve's voice told Bucky that Steve hadn't been the one to end things. Why did Natasha break up with Steve? She wasn't exactly an open book, but it was obvious that she was in love with Steve. What happened to them?

"Why did she break up with you?"

"I don't wanna talk about it, okay?" Steve snapped angrily. "It's over and there's nothing I can do about that. I don't wanna talk about it anymore. My heart is fucking broken and I don't need to analyze that, okay?"

"Okay." He said softly. He'd never seen Steve like that.

"I'm sorry about that outburst." Steve said more calmly. "I'm heading home. Goodnight, Buck."

He nodded. "Goodnight, Steve. You know I'm always there for you."

"I know."

* * *

Steve was in no mood to go to the weekly team meeting, but he had to. He didn't want to see Natasha, assuming that she would actually come. He had no idea what she had done in the last five days. Seeing her would just remind him of what he had lost and would enever have again. He still couldn't really believe that they were done. He just couldn't understand it. They had been so happy and then... it had been over. One minute they had been madly in love and then she had broken up with him. He'd never felt this kind of pain before. He'd thought getting over his missed chance with Peggy had been tough, but this...He didn't think he would ever get over Natasha. He loved her and he wanted to be with her. But she didn't, or otherwise she would have said...it didn't matter anymore. She had broken up with him and he had to learn to live with a broken heart.

It didn't look like the others knew, judging by the lack of reactions when he walked into the room. Only Wanda looked up from her tablet and gave him a gentle smile. Could she sense his pain? Natasha wasn't here yet and he started to hope that she wasn't going to show up. He had no idea how he would react if he saw her right now. He just wanted her back. He would never ask her again, he just wanted to be with her. He missed her so fucking much. He missed her smile, her smell, he even missed the tea mug stains she left all over his furniture.

"Hey."

His heart stopped beating for a second and he turned around, coming face to face with his...with his ex-girlfriend. God, he had an ex now. He hated that fact. "Hi." He whispered. God, she was so beautiful. And so strong and smart. She was just perfect, why didn't she want him anymore?

"You're blocking the way." She said and he automatically moved to the side. "Thanks."

That was all she was going to say? "You're welcome." He managed to answer and watched her walk past by him and sit down next to Wanda.

The meeting went better than he thought it would and he managed to keep it together. He hoped that he could talk to Natasha after the meeting, but Vision wanted to discuss something and Natasha was already gone when he looked for her. He tried calling her, but she was either busy or ignoring his call.

Didn't he at least deserve some closure?

* * *

He hadn't seen Natasha since the team meeting. He only heard from Hill that Natasha was with Fury, dealing with something that wasn't Avengers business. Had Natasha agreed to the job because she didn't want to see him? Were they going to try to avoid running into each other? They had to clear the air so their private life wouldn't affect the team.

He'd asked Friday to tell him when Natasha was back and the AI did so on a Wednesday night. He drove to Natasha's apartment without really thinking about it and was already knocking on her door before he could think about what he was going to say.

He was almost sure that she wouldn't open the door, so he was surprised when she did. She didn't say anything, she just looked at him.

"Um, hi." He should have really come up with a plan. Was he just here to get closure or was he here to win her back?

"Hi."

"Can I come in?"

"Okay." She stepped aside to let him in and closed the door when he was in her hallway. "Why are you here?"

"Can we...can we just take a minute to talk about everything?" He pleaded with her. "We haven't really talked about it."

She sighed, her eyes looking sad. Was her heart broken as well? "What's there to talk about? You want to get married and I don't."

"I shouldn't have sprung that on you so suddenly. It just slipped out."

She eyed him carefully. "But you meant it, didn't you? You wouldn't ask me to marry you just to mess with me."

"Of course I want to marry you. I love you. You are the love of my life. Of course I want us to be married." He said honestly. He hadn't planned to propose that morning in bed, but the words had just left his mouth and they were the truth. "But I don't _need_ to be married to you. I just want to be with you, Nat. I love you and I want us to have a life together. I can't lose you."

"We both want different things. I don't want to get married and I think that you'll start to resent me and I don't think I could take that. You should move one. Find a nice girl who wants to marry you and can give you a family."

And suddenly it dawned on him. He finally knew why she'd turned him down. "Is that why you broke up with me? You think that I want children? We talked about this. I don't. It's true that I used to in another life, but I'm not that man anymore. I only want you. Not everyone wants to have children, Natasha."

"You say that now, but you'll change your mind once all our friends have kids and then you'll hate me because I'm the reason you're not a father." She whispered, looking to the ground.

He tilted her chin up so she would look at him. "Hey." He said softly. "I love you so much and nothing will ever change that. I want a life with you and just you. I just need you and nothing else."

She closed her eyes and a tear rolled down her cheek. "Do you really mean that?"

"Yes." He answered truthfully. "Do you really don't wanna get married at all?"

"I..." She opened her eyes. "I don't know. I never really thought about it to be honest."

"Then think about it and we can talk about it again. I guess I shouldn't have asked you without us never talking about marriage before."

Her small hands moved to cup his face. "I do know that I don't want to be with anyone else." She smiled softly and kissed him gently. "I love you."

"I love you, too." He whispered hoarsely and kissed her with everything that he had. "I love you so much."


	87. Hi (Part X)

_This is truly the last part of the Hi series, I hope you enjoyed it._

* * *

 _2023_

"Hi there, buddy." Steve cooed while he got a screaming James out of his crib. "I'm here. Are you hungry? Yes, you are, aren't you?" He pressed a kiss to James's forehead and walked out of the bedroom. "Mommy's having some me time, so you're gonna get a bottle, okay?"

James grimaced, causing Steve to think that his son sometimes understood them. James hated the bottle and preferred to get his food directly from the source, but Natasha was in her ballet studio at the end of the hallway, getting back into shape. Even though she looked perfect, but he wasn't going to tell his wife what to do with her body. He carried James downstairs to the kitchen to heat up the bottled breast milk. James gave him a wary look, probably suspicious that his mother wasn't taking him into her arms to feed him, but at least he'd stopped crying.

He put his son gently into the baby seat on the kitchen counter so he had his hands free to make James's food warm. Steve still couldn't sometimes believe it that they had a child now. The last three months had been like a dream. He loved James so, so much and his bond with Natasha had grown also stronger since they'd become parents.

He got the bottle out of the fridge and was about to put it in the bottle warmer when he heard Natasha.

"Is my boy hungry?" She asked softly and got James out of his baby seat.

"I can feed him with the bottle, if you want to go back upstairs." He offered, but he knew that Natasha would say no.

"It's okay." She smiled and kissed his cheek when she walked past by him to the breakfast nook. "I was done with my training anyway when I heard James." She sat down with James in her arms, pulling down the zipper of her sports bra. James made a happy sound and found Natasha's nipple almost on his own. His wife smiled down at their son and then looked up at Steve. God, she looked so beautiful with a baby in her arms. "He's already so big."

"I know." Steve smiled. "Half of his closet is too small for him by now."

"Yeah, we have to storage the clothes for his siblings." She said and helped James burp after he was done with his dinner.

"How many siblings is he gonna get?" He asked with a grin and Natasha grinned back. While Natasha wasn't too fond about child birth, she still wanted a big family. And he did, too.

"Well, I definitely want that little girl that you've been talking about." She kissed James's cheek and the baby giggled. "I love you, my sweet boy. So much." She walked over to him and he wrapped his arms around his wife and son, looking down at them. This was what life was about in his opinion. Family was everything and he had lucked out to have one with the prettiest and smartest gal. "And I love you, my darling."

"I love you, too." He smiled and kissed her softly.

"I'm gonna put James down for his nap and then I'm gonna take a shower." She looked up at him through her lashes and he licked his lips. "Do you wanna join me?"

"You know I do!" He growled quietly not to wake a dozing James.

She pecked his lips before she walked out of the kitchen, swaying her hips because she knew that he was watching her every move.

* * *

"Do we even like Tony that much?" Natasha asked him while they were lying on their bed with James between them. She rubbed his stomach and their son giggled happily.

He chuckled and blew a raspberry on James's tiny foot. "I don't want to leave him for a whole night as well, but it's Tony's birthday. And he's one of our best friends. And Rikki is great with James and we're only a phone call away, Nat. We have to leave the house without him from time to time."

"But he's so small and helpless." She kissed James on the forehead and he reached out his little hand to her and she pressed a kiss on his palm. "I don't think I can go. A mother can't just leave her son behind, Steve!"

He didn't really want to go to Tony's party as well, but he knew that they had to. Tony was their friend and they had to get used to the fact that they weren't going to be around their child 24/7. James was almost five months old and they'd managed so far that one parent was always with him if the other one had an appointment.

"You're not leaving him behind, sweetheart. We're probably gonna be back before midnight. And I think we need a little couple time for ourselves." He cupped Natasha's cheek. "We're not just parents."

She closed her eyes. "When did you become the one who's right?"

"I must have picked it up from my wife."

They managed to stay at Tony's party for two and a half hours until they wanted to go home. Natasha wasn't the only one who missed their baby. He just wanted to go home to their child and breathe in James's smell and nuzzle his face in his soft baby hair.

Rikki was doing her homework at the kitchen table, the baby phone next to her, when they got home and she told him that James had pretty much slept through. Steve briefly checked on James before he paid Rikki and walked her home. She and Bucky only lived a block away, but it didn't feel right to let a teenage girl walk home in New York at night.

Natasha had ditched her dress and heels for one of his shirts when he returned and lifted James up in her arms.

"He just woke up." She tugged James against her chest and the baby grabbed a strain of her hair to chew on it. "I don't think he even realized that his parents weren't home."

"Thank God, or he would have thrown a party." He joked and wrapped his arms around the two most important people in his life. "I missed him the whole time, but it was nice to do grown up things again, wasn't it?"

"Yeah, it was."

* * *

 _2024_

It was James's first time at the Barton farm and it was such a joy to see his excitement about everything. He was still a little wobbly on his legs, but he loved to run through the big house, and to see all the animals on the farm. Steve was glad that they decided to visit Aunt Laura and Uncle Clint.

"Mama!" James wobbled towards his mother who picked him up with a big smile on her face. "Mooo!"

"Did you like the cows?"

"Mooo!" James clapped his hands. "Dada, moo!"

Steve laughed and ruffled his son's hair. "Are cows your new favorite animals? Liho won't like that!"

"Man, your kid is fast." Clint came into the kitchen. "One second he's looking at the cows and then the next second he just races off."

"Maybe you're just getting old." Natasha teased and bounced James on her leg who squealed happily. "Your uncle Clint is getting more gray hair each day."

"Hey, I'm not the one turning 100 this year, missy!"

"Do you know what you want to do for your birthday?" Laura asked and Natasha sighed. She'd talked with him about this before and she just wanted to spend the day with him and James, but she didn't want to upset their family and friends.

"Well, to be honest...not much. I just want a nice day with my two boys." She said and James blew a wet raspberry on her cheek, causing her to giggle. "You know that I'm not one for big birthday parties."

Laura smiled. "I know. And you can do whatever you want on your birthday, Nat. But I still like to visit you after your birthday for a nice girls weekend." She came closer to Nat and James and tickled James's tummy. "Cute boys are also invited."

"Oh, so what shall I bring?" Clint quipped and Steve laughed. He was pretty sure that neither he or Clint were invited.

"Oh honey, we both know that you're not a cute boy!" Laura sassed back and Clint stuck his tongue out.

* * *

"Come lay with me." Steve patted the spot next to him and James, who was asleep.

"In the biblical sense?" Natasha raised her eyebrow playfully. "You might wanna bring James to his room then."

"Haha. You know what I mean."

She grinned and laid down next to him and James, her hands placed on his tummy. James grabbed her thumb in his sleep and made a happy sound. "He's so tall already! I can't believe he's turning two soon!"

"I know." He agreed, turning to lie on his side. "So, how did you like your day, birthday girl?"

"It was perfect. I was with my two boys, what more could I want." She smiled at him. "Going to the zoo was a great idea, darling. And dinner was amazing. And thank you for the beautiful necklace."

"Anything for my girl." He was glad that she had enjoyed the day, because he hadn't really known what he could plan that would be fun for Natasha _and_ James since she wanted to spend the day with their son.

" _Anything_?" Her hand moved from James's stomach to Steve's chest and she played with the button of his Henley. She almost seemed a little bit shy. What was on her mind? What did she want?

"You know that I'll give you anything, you just have to ask, sweetheart." He promised her.

"I want another baby." She whispered softly and looked at him hopefully. "James isn't so little anymore and I don't want the age difference to be too big between them."

"Really?" He had been dreaming about another baby as well, but waited for Natasha to address the topic since it was her body. "I would love to have another baby."

Natasha beamed. "Yeah? We can try for your little girl this time."

"Sounds great!" He grinned back. "I'll quickly bring James to his room and then we can get started?"

Natasha laughed and smacked his chest. "I still got my implant, but I can get it removed tomorrow."

"I'll still take James to his room, so we can practice, babe. So we know what we have to do tomorrow." He winked at her and gently lifted their son into his arms. James stirred a bit, but he didn't wake up. He was really exhausted after the trip to the zoo.

"Then I better get naked." She teased, pulling her sweater over her head, revealing a new bra. "You still owe me birthday sex, my love."

He saluted her, his other hand holding James against his chest. "Yes, ma'am!"

* * *

 _2028_

Steve was greeted by Liho when he walked through the front door and petted her head. She wasn't the youngest anymore, but still very agil and loved to play with the kids. He came home from dropping off James at preschool where he proudly told his friends that Captain America was his uncle. The Avengers had been on TV yesterday and it seemed like James had completely forgotten that _his father_ had been once Captain America as well. But then again, Steve couldn't fly and it looked pretty cool when Sam was in the air with the shield in his hands.

"Where are the girls?" He asked Liho who purred and then walked back to her spot on the cat tree. "Thanks for the answer, furball!"

He heard music coming from upstairs and walked up the stairs, already knowing where his girls were. He could see Natasha and Sarah in the dance studio because the door was open. Both were wearing tutus and Natasha moved gracefully to the music and Sarah tried to copy her. He smiled at the sight. Sarah looked just like her mother. While James was a mix of both of them, Sarah had inherited all of her looks from Natasha. She was only two years old, but she was already so bright and joyful. And her and James got along so well. They were thick as thieves and it just warmed his heart to see them together. God, he was so goddamn lucky. He had everything that he could ever want.

"Daddy!" Sarah had spotted him in the mirror and came running towards him. He knew that Natasha had been aware of his presence. "We dance!"

He knelt down to pick up his little girl. He just loved the way she beamed at him and he prayed that life would always be kind to her. "Hi, my little bug."

She scrunched her little nose. "Not a bug!"

"Yes, you are. My little lady bug. The cutest bug." He blew raspberries on her cheeks, making her giggle.

"Hi, my love." Natasha turned the music off and came towards them, giving him a quick peck. "Did James remind everyone again that Sam is his uncle?"

"You know it." He sighed. "It's like he doesn't even believe that I was the _first_ Captain America! The original one!"

Natasha gave him an amused look and took Sarah from him. "How about we get changed and then we go outside to cheer daddy up, Sarah?"

Sarah clapped her little hands. "Yay! See ducks!"

"I think Sarah wants to go the lake." He snickered and Sarah nodded her head.

"Then we'll get changed real quick and then we can go to the ducks, sweetie." Natasha kissed their daughter's head and walked out of the room. He followed them, offering to help Sarah get dressed. "I can do that, darling." She gave him a knowing look and let Sarah down who ran to her room with Liho in tow who had come upstairs. "I'm _pregnant_ , not sick."

"I know, Nat." He said sheepishly. Of course his wife of almost fifteen years would see right through him. "But this time we have two little kids and your first trimester is always the worst and the kids don't even know yet that you're pregnant. I don't want anything happen to you and the baby."

"We're fine. Don't worry, my love." She kissed his cheek. "I feel great today. So great actually, that we should tire out the kids, so we can have a little fun tonight."

He laughed, shaking his head. God, he was such a lucky guy. He had two healthy and beautiful children, a third addition to the family was on their way, and he was still madly in love with his wife. Even after all this time. And she loved him back. She'd waited for him and she'd given him all he'd ever wanted.

"I love you, Steve." She whispered softly. "I've loved you from the moment I first saw you."

He cupped her beautiful face and kissed her. "I love you, my sweet Natalia."


	88. No happy ending

_Natasha gets her funeral._

* * *

He was still in the first stage- denial. He couldn't believe that she was gone. Natasha was _dead_ and she was never coming back. He could still hear her voice in his head, how hopeful and giddy she had sounded before they'd all left to collect the stones.

 _S_ _ee you in a minute._

She hadn't kept that promise. Had she known? Had she somehow known that one of them wasn't going to make it? That _she_ wasn't going to make it? How could she just sacrificed herself? They all needed her! Steve needed her! How was he supposed to keep going without her by his side? How was he supposed to get a life if she was not in it?

"Hey, are you ready?"

He turned around to find Sam standing in the doorway with a compassionate smile on his face.

"No, not really. I don't think I ever will."

They were at the Barton farm to lay Natasha to rest. Not that there was a body to bury. He had searched for her body on Vormir, but it hadn't been there. There was nothing left of her. They had decided to bury a box with things that reminded them of Natasha. It would be buried underneath the tree that had been Natasha's favorite spot to read or to just relax when she had stayed at the farm.

He had chosen to add his hourglass keychain to the box. He had no idea why, but Natasha had given it to him when they had started to work together at SHIELD and it had been with him ever since. It symbolized the beginning of their friendship and now it was the end of it.

He followed Sam outside the house to the tree where Natasha's burial would be. The others were already there and Steve put his keychain into the box. It was a beautiful wooden box that Clint and Cooper had made and a ballerina was carved into the lid. Everyone placed their pieces that reminded them of their lost friend into the box and Steve just wished that Natasha could somehow see how much they had all loved her. It was a small circle, but each and everyone here had meant something to Natasha. The Bartons, Rhodey, Wanda, Sam, Fury, Maria, Pepper, Bruce, and Thor; they were all here to pay their respect to her.

Clint would be the one to give her eulogy. A part of Steve was jealous that he was doing it, he felt like he should be the one, but he knew that he wouldn't get through it without breaking down and Clint had been in her life first.

They lowered the box into the ground and Clint moved to stand next to the empty grave. He looked like Steve felt. They all missed her so much.

"Natasha Romanoff was a huge pain in the ass. Right until the last moment of her life." Clint chuckled sadly. "She wouldn't let me do what was right and just had to do it herself. Natasha was the most selfless person that I've ever met. She always cared for others and never about herself. She was a good person...She was my best friend and it's... not fair that she's not here anymore. She should be here." Clint took a deep breath and Steve looked up the sky, trying to collect himself. He knew why Natasha couldn't have let Clint sacrifice himself. He would have jumped as well if he had been in her shoes, but it was...Clint was right, it just wasn't fair. A small hand slipped into Steve's and he looked down to see Lila standing next to him, tears streaming down her face. Clint hadn't really elaborated about how his family had reacted to Natasha's faith, but he knew that Lila was taking it the hardest. She had been Natasha's favorite. He squeezed the girl's hand and focused back on Clint.

"Natasha was brave and strong, and yet gentle and soft. We were her family and I hope that she knew how much she meant to us. I hope she knows that we'll always love her and we'll miss her. God, I miss you so fucking much, Tasha. Who's gonna save my sorry ass now? Natasha and Tony were the heart and soul of us and I hope that they are together now. Eating cheeseburgers and drinking vodka. If anyone deserves it, it's these two." He took the shovel and threw dirt on the box. "We'll see each other again one day, Tasha. I know it. Until then, try to stay out of trouble, sis."

He pushed the shovel towards Bruce and stormed off to the house. Everyone said their last words to Natasha and Steve was the last person to do so. He didn't want to, because it meant that she was really never coming back and he didn't know how he was supposed to deal with that. The pain was unbearable and it had only been five days. How was he supposed to live like this for the rest of his life? His best friend, his partner, _the woman that he loved_ was dead and he was just supposed to keep going? He'd never even had the chance to tell her what he really felt for her. He'd never told her that he was in love with her. He should have stayed at the compound with her, he should have been there for her. He had just left and let her deal with everything on her own. They should have moved on _together_. He never even got to really kiss her.

"I hope you're at peace now. And I hope that we'll see each other again. Wherever you are, I hope that I'll get there one day to be with you. I miss you, Nat. And I love you. You never lost hope in the last five years and it worked. You're the reason that everyone's back. I just wish you were here to see it. And I'll make sure that everyone will know what you did. I won't let them forget your sacrifice. You've been always a hero and everyone is gonna know it. I love you, Natasha."


	89. Cupid (AU)

_AU Natasha Romanoff runs the most successful dating agency in New York until she gets Steve Rogers as her client._

* * *

"Natasha, your next client is here." Her assistant Darcy informed Natasha over the intercom.

Natasha quickly finished her coffee and told Darcy to let the client in. So far Natasha had found for 91% of her clients the perfect partner, making her the best in the matchmaking industry. She didn't know what it was, but she was really good at setting people up and why shouldn't she make money with it?

The door opened and a tall, blond man walked into her office. Just judging by his looks, it wouldn't be hard for her to find someone for the man, because he was _really_ attractive.

"Uh, hello. I'm Steve Rogers, ma'am." He almost seemed shy, but Natasha was used to it. Most people were a little bit embarrassed to hire an agency to find a partner for them.

"Hello, Steve. I'm Natasha." She shook his head and motioned for him to sit down. She offered him something to drink and told Darcy to make him a coffee.

Darcy came in with Steve's coffee and he mostly stared at his cup than looked at Natasha. "So, what brings you to me?" She asked, hoping to break the ice.

"Well, my friends...This wasn't my idea. My friends are paying for it." He laughed uncomfortably. "They are sick of me being alone."

"Does it bother you that you aren't in a relationship?"

"Well, I mean I don't hate it, but...I also think about the future and I want a wife and kids and I have to find someone for that, right?" He smiled sheepishly and Natasha thought that his smile was pretty.

"Why haven't you found the one yet, Steve?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know. My friends tried to set me up, but it just never clicked, I guess."

She nodded. "Okay. Are your expectations too high?"

"I don't think so. I just want someone who is kind, compassionate. A woman who makes me laugh and who loves kids and animals. I don't care what she looks like or what she does for a living."

Steve sounded pretty unproblematic so far and he was good looking, usually those guys didn't even have to look for women, they just came to them.

"Are you into any _weird_ sexual things? Golden showers or whips?"

"What? No!" His eyes widened and Natasha almost laughed. She wasn't judgemental and didn't care what her clients did in their bedrooms, but she had to know if they were into certain things to find the right match. She couldn't set up an innocent virgin with a someone who was into leather and whips.

"Relax, I was just teasing. Mostly." She smiled a little and Steve visibly relaxed, but his cheeks were still flushed. _Adorable_. "I just need to know if you have certain likes or dislikes, so I can find the right woman for you. I'm not just talking about sexual preferences, it applies to anything. One client, for example, didn't want to date someone who eats meat."

"Okay, that makes sense, I guess. Like I said, I don't have a specific woman in mind. I like strong-willed and independent women. I like loyalty and kindness."

She nodded and wrote everything down. Steve sounded like an easy client and she was sure that she would find the perfect woman for him in no time.

 _Famous last words..._

* * *

Steve had filled out the sheet that every client had to do and Natasha had gone over it right after he'd left her office. He was a vet and was now working as an art teacher at a private school, but he also volunteered at a youth center. He'd had one serious relationship so far, but the woman had moved back to Britain and they'd ended things. She was bit surprised that a man in his 30s had only been in one real relationship, but it wasn't too unusual. Maybe he just hadn't met the right girl yet, but Natasha was going to change that.

She compared his scores with the women in her database and found a few candidates that could be perfect. She sent Trish an email, writing her that she had potentially found someone, adding a quick description of Steve to the mail. Male clients only got info about her female ones after they'd agreed to it. Natasha had vowed to herself that she was going to protect the women that pretty much trusted her with their hearts and safety.

Trish agreed to meet with Steve and Natasha contacted him to let him know that she had a potential date for him. She gave Trish Steve's number and hoped that the two would hit it off. Trish was independent and career-driven, but also very loyal and family-orientated and Steve could be the perfect fit for her.

Steve and Trish didn't hit it off. He behaved like a gentleman and paid the bill, but he hadn't been much of an exciting date according to Trish.

Well, not every first set up was a success. Natasha would keep looking.

She thought Carol would be a good fit, but her and Steve didn't even go out. She tried her client Gamora (hippie parents were responsible for that unique name), but she also didn't want to have a second date, and then Peter Quill walked into Natasha's office and she knew that he was perfect for Gamora.

Natasha just didn't understand. Steve seemed perfect on paper, why didn't she find someone for him? Had he fooled her? Kept something from her? Was he a creep in the end? Didn't he take it serious? His friends had paid the fee, had Steve only come to her to make his friends happy? Was he some kind of player and only wanted a woman for a night? She couldn't get a read on him and she decided to change that. She contacted Steve and invited him to lunch, telling him she wanted to go over a few potential matches for him personally.

He was already there when she walked into the bistro near the school he was working at. He stood up and shook her hand when she arrived at the table and he even offered to pull out the chair for her. His manners were impeccable so far.

They ordered and Natasha decided to interrogate her client to figure out why he hadn't matched with her picks yet.

She took a sip from her white wine and smiled at him. He smiled back. "I hope you're not too unhappy with our services."

"Huh?" He blinked at her in confusion.

"We haven't found the right woman for you yet." She chuckled a little.

"Yeah..." He blushed a little. "They were great, though. I can see why you set me up with them...It just didn't click, I guess. Happens a lot to me."

He seemed uncomfortable and she smiled to ease his tension. "I'm going to change that. Can you tell me why it didn't click with them?"

"I honestly don't know. I sometimes think that I'll never find someone. Maybe it's just not in the cards for me. I've met wonderful women, but I never fell for them. And I'm sure they didn't fall for me either."

"Are you still in love with the woman who moved back to Europe?" She asked him softly. If he was still in love with someone else, he would never find a new girlfriend. Women sensed those kind of things.

"No." He shook his head. "I know we weren't meant for each other. I loved her a lot, but not anymore. I'm completely over her."

She believed him. "Okay. Sorry for being nosy."

"It's fine."

Their food arrived and they talked about his job and hobbies. He also asked about her and he was an attentive listener. They laughed a lot and Natasha was surprised when her assistant called her, asking when she would be back at the office.

Steve seemed surprised as well. "Shit, I have to be back at school soon." She nodded and got her credit card out of her purse. Steve shook his head. "No, it's my treat."

Natasha laughed, but shook her head. "No, I invited you. I just deduct this from the tax." She winked at him and he laughed.

Steve waited with her until her Uber arrived and wished her a nice day before he walked down the street. The car drove past by him and he waved her at when he caught her looking at him.

He was such a great guy, why was he still single? Why hadn't she found the right woman for him yet? It was starting to bother her. She was so good at her job, why couldn't she set up this perfect guy with his dream girl? Where the fuck was that woman? She would find her for him.

* * *

Natasha never worked on Sunday to keep a healthy work- and- life balance and today she was spending her free day with her niece Lila. Lila was the daughter of her best friends Clint and Laura and she loved the kid to death. She loved all three Barton kids very much, but Lila was her favorite. Not that she would ever admit that out loud.

Lila wanted to check out some art and crafts stores in Brooklyn since the girl was currently into making her own jewelry and Natasha agreed to buy her new supply. Her niece thanked her happily and wanted to invite her to coffee and cake, but Natasha shook her head and told her that it was her treat. Going to a cafe in Brooklyn was a bit too expensive for the glitter wallet of an eight year old.

Lila ran into the back of the store, because there was something that she wanted to check out before they got cake, and Natasha waited for her, looking at some glass figures.

"Natasha?"

She turned around and came face to face with Steve who was smiling at her. "Hi."

"Hey! What brings you to Brooklyn? I took you for a Manhattan girl."

"My niece. She says the crafts stores in Brooklyn are the best." She laughed and Steve grinned.

"She does have a point there."

"Steve?" An older woman came towards him who had to be his mother. They both had the same beautiful eyes. "Oh, hello." The woman smiled at her kindly. "I'm Sarah, Steve's mother. And you are?" She looked so hopeful and amused that Natasha realized Steve really had been single for a long time. His mother seemed to hope that Natasha was _interested_ in her son.

"I'm-"

"This is Natasha." Steve said quickly. "She's a friend of a friend." He shot her a pleading look. So he hadn't told his mother that a dating agency was helping him find a woman.

"Yes." Natasha nodded. "We met once through mutual friends."

"Oh, which friends?" His mother asked intrigued and Natasha saw out of the corner of her eye that Steve seemed to start to freak out. So he wasn't a great liar. That was actually good.

"Uh-"

"Auntie Nat, can you burrow me ten bucks? I don't have enough for this and I neeeeed it!" Lila joined the little group with a box almost as big at her. Natasha took a closer look and saw that it was filled with countless beads and pearls for jewelry making. The box covered most of her face, so Lila didn't notice Steve and ran into him. "Oh, I'm sorry." She looked up at Steve, and god, he looked like a giant next to her. "Who are you?"

"This is...my... friend Steve and his mother Sarah." She introduced them and Sarah cooed about Lila, telling her what a pretty little thing she was. Lila grinned proudly and she reminded her of Clint so much in that moment. And Sarah looked like she really wanted grandchildren. Poor Steve.

Steve shook Lila's hand and asked her for what she needed all those beads and pearls. She told him excitedly about her jewelry and almost ripped out Natasha's arm when she wanted to show Steve the bracelet she had made for her aunt. He was really good with kids. Well, of course, he was. He was a goddamn teacher!

"Do you like cake?" Lila asked Steve with big eyes and Natasha was sure that Lila just developed her first crush. Poor Clint!

"Who doesn't?!" Steve asked with a laugh.

"You and your mom can join us, right, Auntie Nat? We were gonna go to a cafe!"

She was about to tell Lila that Steve and Sarah probably already had plans, but his mother spoke up before Natasha could open her mouth. "We'd love to. Don't we, Steve?"

"I thought you wanted me to paint your living room?"

"That living room isn't going anywhere, is it?" She said with a smile and asked Lila what her favorite kind of cake was.

Well, it looked like they were going to have cake with Steve and his mom. Steve shot her an excusing look and Natasha just smiled. She was actually okay with spending more time with him. Him _and_ his mother, of course.

They found a cute, little cafe and got the last table by the windows. Lila squealed in delight when she discovered that they had cupcakes and chose a unicorn one while the adults went with cheese cake or apple pie.

Natasha had to admit that she was having a lot of fun. Sarah was just a sweetheart and Steve was such a great guy. He listened to Lila and took her seriously. He was probably everyone's favorite teacher at his school.

Sarah told Lila that she had to get her brothers cupcakes as well and offered to pay for them before Natasha could get her wallet out. Sarah and Lila left their table to pick out cupcakes for Cooper and Nate.

"I'm sorry that my mom hijacked your day with your niece."

She looked at Steve with a smile on her face. "Well, if I remember correctly Lila invited you."

He chuckled. "True. She's a great kid."

"Eh, she has her moments." She grinned. "Am I correct, when I say that your mom wants you and me to be a thing?"

He grimaced before he blushed. "Is she that obvious? She's very excited when there's a woman in a five feet radius from me."

"She doesn't want you to be alone anymore."

"Yeah, but her ulterior motive are grandchildren." He huffed out a laugh. "It's more about her than me. She just wants to be a grandma."

She chuckled and finished her latte. "I really had a great time today. Your mom's great. She'll be a great mother in law."

Sarah and Lila came back to the table in that moment. "So, Natasha-" Sarah said and Natasha looked up at her. Steve's mother sat down with a glint in her eyes. "Lila told me you're single?"

"Uh, yes."

"Isn't that a bit odd for someone who sets up people for a living? Shouldn't you be the shining example?"

Steve choked on his coffee and Natasha just stared at Sarah. She _knew_? How? Did Lila tell her while they were getting cupcakes? "Um..."

"You found a husband for my friend's daughter. Jemma Simmons? I saw you at her wedding." Sarah grinned smugly. "I wasn't sure at first, but then I remembered why your face was familiar. You two aren't really friends, are you?"

Steve was red as a beet while Lila was just confused since she didn't really understand what Natasha did for a living. "I can explain." Steve mumbled, looking like a boy who got caught with his hand in the cookie jar. "It was Sam and Bucky's idea..."

Sarah looked more amused than mad that they had lied to her. "Did you find someone for my son yet?"

"Um, no. Not yet." Natasha admitted rather embarrassed. It really bugged her that she hadn't found his perfect match yet.

"Well, it's pretty obvious, isn't it." Sarah said, smirking at them. "You two should go out with each other. Right, Lila?"

Lila had obviously lost her interest in the conversation, but now she was nodding before she continued to shove her cupcake into her face.

"Mom!" Steve chided, turning even redder.

"I promise that I'll find the right person for your son. He's a great guy and the perfect woman is out there for him, I know it. He won't be alone for long, don't worry." She promised, hoping that Sarah would drop the idea of _her_ dating Steve. That idea was ridiculous. He wasn't even her type! He was way too...Huh...She couldn't think of anything. _Shit_.

"You two don't know how you look at each other since the crafts store. And you probably didn't realize that you pretty much only talked to each other and not to me or Lila." Sarah grinned. "I'm just stating the obvious. Why try to find him someone else, when you both obviously like each other."

Natasha didn't dare to look at Steve in that moment. "We should get going, Lila." She threw a few bills on the table and stood up. Lila seemed confused, but stood up as well.

"I didn't mean to embarrass you, Natasha." Sarah said softly.

"It's okay." Natasha forced herself to smile and picked up Lila's crafts store box from the ground. "Have a nice day." She took Lila's hand and walked with her towards the door.

"Bye!" Lila said. "Thanks for the cupcakes for my brothers!"

Natasha hadn't missed that Steve hadn't really said anything. Natasha was going to have to let Steve go as her client. She was way too embarrassed to work for him anymore. It wasn't his fault and she knew that Sarah hadn't been malicious, but Natasha just wanted to forget that the whole thing ever happened.

* * *

The first thing Natasha did when she came into her office on Monday morning was cancelling her morning meeting. She needed the time to write an email to Steve, explaining that she was ending the contract. She just didn't know what she was supposed to write. She couldn't just write that she was mortified to see him again, because she was embarrassed and starting to think that his mother maybe had a point. Maybe she was interested in Steve. Maybe she had been happy deep down that it hadn't worked out with the women she had set him up with. And maybe she hadn't acknowledged that because she wasn't really good at the whole relationship thing which was kind of ironic regarding her profession. But she couldn't write any of that.

Her phone rang and she saw that Darcy was calling her. "Yes?"

"Steve Rogers is here, boss lady."

 _Shiiiit._ "Tell him I'm not here!"

"I would, but you're on speaker."

Natasha slapped her hand against her forehead. Fuck, fuck, fuck. "Let him in."

The door opened and Steve came in with flowers and a box of chocolates. "Hi."

"Hey."

"The flowers are from me and the chocolate from my ma. She's really sorry. And so am I." He smiled sheepishly.

"It's okay. I know she didn't want to offend me."

"I have a confession to make." He put the flowers and chocolate on her desk. "I think I sabotaged my dates."

"Huh?"

"I...I kept comparing them to...you." He rubbed the back of his head and avoided to look at her. "Truth to be told, I can't stop thinking about you since I walked into your office."

"Oh."

"Yeah, _oh_." He looked at her and he was a mix between nervousness and hope. "My mom was right about me. Was she right about you?"

She wanted to tell him that his mother wasn't right about her, but she somehow couldn't. Steve had something about him that made her want to be always honest with him.

"There's a possibility."

"Yeah?"

"Uh, yeah."

"Does that mean you'll go out with me?" He asked, smiling sheepishly.

She couldn't help, but to smile back. "Yes, that means I go out with you. I guess I kinda have to since I don't seem to find anyone else for you."


	90. Ohana (AU)

_Best friends Steve and Natasha spend the night together before Steve's deployment and Natasha has a big surprise for him when he comes home._

* * *

Natasha didn't really want to go to the party, but she knew that she would regret it if she didn't. It was the farewell party for her friends Steve and James who were leaving the day after tomorrow for Sokovia. She had been more than surprised when Steve had told her that he was going on another tour since he'd originally planned to leave the Army to pursue a career as an illustrator and he'd already had a few offers. But he felt like he still had to serve his country and she'd never talk him out of it. But that didn't mean that she wasn't terrified that something was going to happen to him. He had been shot three years ago and Natasha had been out of her mind when she'd heard about it. The wound hadn't been too serious, but what if he wouldn't have that much luck again? Steve was her best friend since high school and she had been so happy when he'd told her that he was going to move to New York permanently, but now it would take almost three years until that could happen. She wasn't a religious person, but she prayed that God was looking after Steve. And James, of course.

The party was at James's mother's house and Natasha's chest felt tight when she thought about the fact that James was the only one who still had a parent. Steve's mother Sarah died five years ago and Natasha's adoptive father Nick died when she'd just started college. Another reason why her and Steve were so close.

She rang the doorbell and Winifred let her in, informing her that the boys were outside on the patio. A few people were already there and James was currently flirting with a woman that Natasha didn't know.

Steve was at the grill, flipping burger patties. He smiled at her brightly when he spotted her. She felt sick, when she thought about the fact that she wasn't going to see him for such a long time, maybe even never again, and it just broke her heart. Steve was her best friend, he was her person. He was her rock, her family. Her everything.

She forced herself to smile when she reached him. "Hey."

"Hi, Nat." He kissed her cheek in greeting.

"I see that James left you to do all the work while he's trying to get laid?" She rolled her at James's typical behavior and Steve just laughed.

"Well, you know him. And Winifred is gonna make him do the dishes as payback." He grinned and checked the meat on the grill. "How are you?"

"I'm okay. You don't have to worry about me, Steve. I'll be okay." She assured him, taking his hand to squeeze it briefly. "I'm gonna miss you, though."

"I'm gonna miss you, too. Like crazy." He gave her a sad smile. "I'm gonna miss so much of your life."

She wanted to tell him that he shouldn't go, but she couldn't do that to him. He loved being a soldier and serving his country, she couldn't take that away from him, even though she knew that he would stay if she asked him to.

"I'll wait with my wedding until you're back."

"You already got a groom?" He snorted, piling the burger patties on a plate.

"Tons, Steve!"

Natasha was one of the last to leave and Steve naturally offered her to walk her home, and she was glad that she was going to spend a few more minutes with him. She gave James a long bear hug and told him to be careful and to look after Steve. He kissed her forehead and told her jokingly to find a lot of female friends for him to hit on while he was gone. She wasn't as close to him as she was to Steve, but she still loved him.

They walked in silence to her apartment building and she desperately wanted to beg him to stay in New York. She was so scared that something was going to happen to him. He was the most important person in her life, she couldn't lose him.

"I promise that I'll be careful, Nat." He said, breaking the silence. "I'll do everything I can to come back to you."

"Am I that obvious?"

He smiled softly. "We know each other for over 15 years, Nat. I _know_ you."

They stopped in front of her building. "Please come back to me, Steve. I can't lose you, too."

He looked deeply into her eyes. "You won't. Bucky and I, we got each other's back. We'll be okay."

"Okay." She nodded, willing her tears away. She threw herself into his arms and buried her face into his broad chest. He rubbed his hands in a soothing manner over her back and she wished that they could stay like this forever.

She looked up at him. Had his eyes always been so beautiful? And his lips so plush and kissable? She didn't know what was happening, but she was suddenly dying to feel Steve's lips against her own. She rose to her tiptoes and pressed her lips softly against Steve's. His grip on her tightened and he gently kissed her back. It should feel weird to kiss your best friend like that, but it just felt perfect. The kiss grew deeper and more passionate and she led Steve to her apartment without really thinking about anything except that she wanted to be as close to him as possible. She wanted to have as much of him as she could get for tonight.

* * *

 _Almost three years later_

Steve was beyond happy that he was finally back home. It had been hard to be gone for so long, but now he was back for good. He left the Army and was ready to live a civilian life. He already had a job interview next week and was looking forward to sharing a house with Bucky. They both knew how lucky they were that their living situation had already been solved thanks to Bucky's mom's connections. And he couldn't wait to see Natasha again. He had missed her so fucking much and he hoped that things could change between them now that he was back.

She hadn't mentioned a boyfriend in her mails and he was sure that their night together had meant as much to her as it had to him. He had been in love with her since the first time he'd seen her, but he'd always thought that she'd just wanted friendship from him until _that night_. He had felt in her kisses and touches that she loved him too, and he knew that she hadn't been ready to admit it to herself, but maybe she now was and they could start a life together. All his other relationships had failed, because Natasha had always been the one for him. And he hoped that he was the one for her, too.

Their friend Sam and Winifred picked them up from the airport and drove them to their new house. He and Bucky both loved the house, and thanks to Winifred all their things were already there.

"Do you know if Natasha will come by later?" Steve asked Sam and Winifred while they sat in the kitchen, eating Winifred's reheated lasagna.

Sam and Buck's mom shared a look before Winifred spoke up. "You haven't heard from her yet?"

"She said that she was busy with work, but would come by as soon as she could." He answered. God, he was dying to see her!

"Maybe you should just come by her place tonight, Steve." Winifred said and Sam looked like he wanted to disagree. "You have her new address, right?"

"Yeah." Winifred's idea wasn't so bad. That way Bucky wasn't there to eavesdrop.

He bought Natasha's favorite flowers on his way to her new apartment and tried to calm his nerves. Should he just confess his feelings or should he ask her on a date? He would just see what felt most natural when he would finally see her again. Knowing himself, he would probably just blurt everything out.

He was lucky and someone just left the apartment building and Steve could just walk through the door. Natasha had to make good money at SI if she could afford living here. He was happy for her that she was so successful.

He found apartment 5D pretty fast and knocked on her door, trying to calm the butterflies in his stomach. He was finally going to see her again!

The door opened and his heart almost jumped out of his chest. God, she was so beautiful. The most beautiful girl he'd ever seen. "Hey!"

"Steve!" She looked more shocked than surprised. "I was going to visit you and James tomorrow-"

"Mommy!" A little voice inside her apartment yelled. Did she have guests? "Mommy! Stitch gone!" A little girl was suddenly standing next to Natasha. "Mommy!"

Steve just stared at the child. The girl was still a toddler and had Natasha's hair. And she called Natasha mommy. _God, Natasha had a child._ What the fuck? The little girl was looking at him. "Hi?"

Oh God, that girl had his mother's eyes... She had _his_ eyes. Was that...What the fuck was going?!

"Natasha?"

"Mommy!" The girl tugged on Natasha's cardigan. "Stiiiitch!"

Natasha knelt down. "I'll help you find Stitch in a minute, Sarah. Please go to your room."

 _Sarah_?! The girl's name was Sarah? Oh God, that little girl was _his daughter_ , wasn't she? He watched as _Sarah_ looked at him curiously before she walked back into the apartment.

"I wanted to tell you." Natasha suddenly whispered. "I didn't mean to keep it from you, Steve. I just didn't know how to tell you."

He dropped the flowers to the floor. "She's... _Sarah_...She's mine?"

She nodded. "Yes."

He had no idea what he was feeling right now. There were too many emotions to name them each. Too many thoughts were running through his head. Holy shit, he had a child. A child with Natasha. But she hadn't told him about his daughter. How could she keep something like this from him? He had a right to know! Suddenly he was just fucking pissed.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I was...You were gone and I was just scared and confused. I had no idea if you even wanted a baby and it was just a one night stand and I...I wanted to tell you, but more time passed and now you're here..."

"How could you keep this from me?" He shouted and Natasha winced. He had a child this whole time and no clue. God, he'd already missed so much!

"I didn't want to ruin your life. Being in the Army was your whole life and...I didn't want you to have to make a decision between that and a baby. I should have told you ages ago, but I knew it would be worse with each passing day and I just...I was scared. I didn't plan to get pregnant."

"Does she know about me?"

"I told her about my best friend Steve, but she doesn't know that you're her father. She's too young to understand that it takes two to make a baby. For her it's normal that she only has a mommy."

"I want to be part of her life, Natasha. I want to be her dad. You can't make me miss more of my daughter's life." He snapped at her. She couldn't keep him away from Sarah. He was going to get a lawyer if he had to.

"I won't." She whispered. "Do you want to come over for breakfast tomorrow? We should tell Sarah together who you are." She wiped a tear away and he was mad at himself that he just wanted to wrap his arms around her. "I am truly sorry, Steve. I know what I did was wrong and that it's unforgivable. You can see Sarah as often as you want. I won't keep her away from you."

"Good." He said through gritted teeth. "I'll come by at 8." Natasha nodded. "I can't believe you did this to me."

"I am truly sorry." Now she was truly crying and Steve felt like an ass.

"Mommy! Stitch back!" Sarah yelled from inside the apartment.

"She's a Lilo& Stitch fan?" He asked softly.

"Yeah." Natasha said with a small smile. "She's a big Disney fan, but Stitch's her favorite. She loves to draw, just like her dad."

Steve took a deep breath, trying to clear his mind. He was a father and he had missed the first two years of his daughter's life. He hadn't even known that she existed, but Natasha had named their child after _his mother_.

"Were you ever going to tell me?"

"Yes, tomorrow." She closed her eyes for a second. "I was scared and pregnant and all alone. My best friend was on another continent, fighting to make the lives of others safer, and I didn't know what do to. I didn't want you to leave everything that you believed in behind. I didn't want you to have to give up your career. I knew that you would try to come back to me to help me with the baby." Her smile was almost shy. "You are the sweetest man that I have ever met. I missed you every day and I hate myself for keeping this from you. There's no excuse for it, but I am truly sorry. I want you to be in Sarah's life, I want her to have her dad."

He believed her. And he honestly had no idea how he would have handled the whole situation. He would have wanted to come home, could he have gone home? He had no idea if they had just let him go home. There were countless mothers and fathers serving who had to leave their family behind. They wouldn't have made an exception for him. And he would have thought about Nat and the baby the whole time and that distraction could have gotten him killed. The whole situation hadn't been ideal, but Natasha was still his best friend. God, she was _the mother of his child._ And he still loved her, he always would.

"I...I still have to process everything, but I want us to have a good relationship. You, me and our daughter." He said eventually and Natasha looked relieved. "I see you tomorrow."

She nodded. "Please don't hate me. You're still my person. You're...I love you, you know that, right?"

"Yeah." Of course, he knew that she loved him. He had just always hoped that love would grow into something romantic.

She shook her head. "No, not that like that. I'm in love with you. And I know that telling you makes everything even more complicated. There hasn't been anyone since you. I realized that night that I have always been in love with you. And I love you even more for giving me Sarah. She's great, Steve. You're gonna love her so much."

He'd waited 15 years to hear her say that she was in love with him and now...it had to happen like _this_. He couldn't tell her that he felt the same. Not tonight, not after what he'd found out.

"Goodnight, Nat."

She nodded and closed the door. He shook his head and walked to the elevator. He still couldn't believe that he was someone's father. God, he couldn't wait to get to know his little girl.

* * *

He barely slept that night. He tossed and turned, thinking about his child. And Natasha. In a perfect world, they would have raised Sarah together as a couple. But the reality looked different and he had to learn to accept that. Natasha hadn't kept Sarah a secret to hurt him, he knew that. He knew that she must have been terrified when she'd found out that she was pregnant and he had been thousands of miles away, risking his life. A lot of soldiers missed important parts of their children's lives, but at least they _knew_ that they were parents...

But he loved Natasha and he already loved Sarah, and a family should be together, shouldn't it? Natasha was sorry, he knew that, and he could forgive her over time. He had to if he wanted to be a good father for Sarah. And the fact that Natasha named their baby after his mother meant the world to him and showed him that she truly had been thinking about him.

Remembering that Sarah loved Disney, he went to a toy store and bought a Stitch bag for her. He really hoped that she didn't own one already. He rang the doorbell and Natasha buzzed him in. He basically ran up the stairs, because he was so excited to see his daughter again. And today she would find out who he was. And he was happy to see Natasha. She had messed up, but he loved her. And he knew that he always would.

Natasha was already standing at the doorway with Sarah behind her legs, her head poking around to look at him. She waved her little hand and his heart fluttered in his chest.

"Morning, Steve." Natasha smiled a little.

"Hi." He smiled back and then knelt down. "Hi, Sarah. I'm Steve."

"Hi, Steeb." She grinned. "Mommy gave us a free day for you!"

Natasha laughed. "She's very excited that she can stay home today."

"This is for you. It's a little bag." He handed Sarah his present and her whole face lit up.

"Mommy, a baby Stitch!" She hugged the bag against her little body and his heart melted. He barely knew her, but he already loved her _so much_.

"Please, come in." Natasha stepped aside. "I hope blueberry pancakes are still your favorite?"

"I loooove blue pancapes!" Sarah giggled and ran towards, as Steve assumed, the kitchen.

"She takes a lot after you, Steve." Natasha said softly. "I think the only thing she got from me is my hair."

"She's beautiful." He said, unable to take his eyes of his daughter. "She definitely got that from you."

"Charmer." She shoved him with her elbow.

"Thank you for naming her Sarah."

"It was my first and only choice."

"Steeb, help please!" Sarah looked at him with big eyes and he realized that she wanted him to help her get into her chair. He helped her and Sarah smiled happily. "Thanks, Steeb."

He mostly just watched Sarah during breakfast. She was a bright and happy kid. She babbled a lot and asked him to cut her pancakes for her. Natasha told him that Sarah loved to draw, promising to give him some of her drawings, and that she was obsessed with pigeons for some reason.

Natasha took a deep breath when Sarah was done with her breakfast and Steve knew that the moment was here. They were going to tell her who he really was. Was she going to understand that or was she too young for that?

"Sarah, sweetie?"

Sarah looked up from her plate and Steve smiled when he saw that she had syrup smeared all over her little chin. "You remember what I told you about Steve?"

She nodded seriously. "He's your fwiend. Like Lila is my fwiend! You cry when you look at his photo, mommy. You miss him because he was helping people."

Natasha had cried because of him?

"Yes, he's my friend. Do you sometimes wonder why Lila has a mommy and a daddy and you have only a mommy? You do have a daddy. The best daddy ever."

Sarah looked from Natasha to Steve. Did she...Did she know? "Mommy loves you... that's why she sad...Lila's mommy loves Lila's daddy..."

"Yes, Sarah sweetie. Steve is your father."

Sarah looked at him with big eyes and she almost seemed shy. "Do you stay?"

"In New York?" He asked and she nodded. "Yes, I'm never going away again. I'm here for you. I want to get to know you, Sarah."

"Mommy was sad..." Sarah looked at her mother. "She miss you. I'm not wanna be sad."

"Steve's here for good. He won't leave again, sweetie. I'm not sad anymore. Your father's back. You won't be sad, because you won't have to miss him, okay." She said softly and Sarah nodded. And Steve realized in that moment that one of the reasons why she hadn't told him or Sarah about each other was to spare them that pain of missing each other. How was she supposed to understand that she had a father, but he wasn't with her?

"Do you wike Disney?" Sarah asked him hopefully and he laughed.

"I love Disney. I haven't seen Lilo & Stitch in forever."

Her little face lit up. "Can we watch, mommy?"

"Of course." She chuckled. "But only because it's a special day."

"Thanks, mommy!" Sarah jumped off her chair, causing him to almost have a heart attack, but she gracefully landed on her tiny feet. Looked like she'd inherited more from her mother than just her hair and beauty. Sarah took his hand and he stood up from his chair. "You, mommy and me are Ohana!"

 _Ohana_? Right, he remembered what it meant. He looked from Sarah to Natasha and then back to their daughter. "Yes, we are, sweetie."


	91. Ohana II (AU)

_Thank you for all your feedback- here's a second part:)_

* * *

Steve saw Sarah as often as possible in the following weeks. He spent all his free time with her to get to know her. He worked as a illustrator at a publishing house and went to a therapist to deal with his PTSD, but the rest of his time was for Sarah.

She was his little sunshine and he loved her more than life itself. She was so smart and kind, and he loved to see the world through her eyes. Sarah couldn't yet stay at his place because she got homesick and so Natasha offered that he could sleep on their couch from time to time so he could tuck Sarah in and wake her up in the morning.

His relationship with Natasha was getting better. He hadn't told her yet that he was in love with her, because he just wasn't ready, but he was grateful that she went with him to his therapist so they could talk about everything. And she agreed to joined custody and he had the same rights as Natasha.

He'd stayed the night and was still half asleep on the couch, when he heard giggling. He fought to keep his eyes closed, waiting to find out what his little sunshine was going to do.

He felt her poke his cheek and he tried his best not to smile. Sarah giggled again and then she climbed onto his chest. "Wakey!" She squealed and patted his cheek. "Wakey! Up get!"

"Noooo!" He growled playfully and wrapped his arms around her. "Nooo! You're stuck here! We're never getting up!"

She giggled happily and tried to kick him with her little legs. "Mommy, help!" She squealed, when he started to tickle her. "Daddy mean!"

He stopped immediately and just looked at Sarah. This was the first time that she'd called him _daddy_. She seemed confused. "Daddy? What wrong?"

He just hugged her against him and kissed the top of her head. God, his baby smelled so good. "Nothing is wrong, sweetie. I love you. So much."

"Luv you." She mumbled and he wanted to cry. He was so goddamn happy in that moment. "Daddy, I'm hungry!"

"Breakfast is almost ready!" He looked up to see Natasha watching them from the doorway. She had tears in her eyes. "Why don't you get Stitch, Sarah?"

"Okay." Sarah pressed a wet kiss to his cheek and he helped her climb off him. "Thanks, daddy." She beamed and then ran to her room to get her Stitch.

"Did you hear that?" He asked Natasha and he was amazed at how hoarse his voice sounded.

She nodded. "I did." And then tears were rolling down her cheeks. "I'm sorry you had to wait so long for that. I'm sorry for everything. I truly am. If I could go back and-"

"Hey, stop. We can't go back and we have to make the most out of what we have now." He stood up to hug her. It was the first that she was back in his arms since he'd found out about everything. "Sarah and I have each other and that's the only thing that matters."

"I'm still sorry." She whispered and pulled away from him. That hurt him, but he knew that it was better this way. Was he even ready to comfort her? After all the pain she'd caused him? She walked to the dresser that Nick had left her and picked up a book from it. "This is a journal. I wrote everything down about Sarah since the day I found out that I was pregnant. I...I addressed it to you. I kind of talked to you through that journal." She handed it to him. "I was scared to give it to you, but you have to have it. It's yours. I know it's not the same as experiencing everything yourself, but-"

He took the book and put it into his overnight bag. "Thank you." She was right it wasn't the same, but he still couldn't wait to read it.

Sarah came back in that moment, Stitch in her arms, and she looked up at him with big eyes. Steve laughed because he knew what she wanted. "Come here." He picked her up and carried her into the kitchen. He put her into her seat and helped her with her oatmeal. Sarah thought that they would always have blueberry pancakes when he was there, so she looked at the oatmeal with a cute frown on her perfect face.

"No pancapes?"

"No, sweetie. Oatmeal's great." He said, hoping to get her to eat it. "Look, mommy put fruit and nuts into it."

"Syrup?" She asked hopefully, but he shook his head. "Pleeease, daddy?" He was really tempted to give her syrup, but he heard Natasha say no behind him and Sarah pouted. "Please, mommy?"

"No, Sarah. Oatmeal is good for you and I put raspberries in it. You love them, remember? Now be a good girl and eat your breakfast, so your daddy can walk you to kindergarten, okay?"

"Okay."

He got ready while Natasha got Sarah for the day. Sarah was wearing her little Stitch bag while he shouldered her little backpack with her lunch in it and he watched Natasha kissing their daughter goodbye.

"Be good today, sweetie. I'll pick you up later." Natasha cupped Sarah's face. "I love you."

"Luv you, mommy." She grinned and took Steve's hand. Well, she mostly wrapped her little hand around his finger. She looked expectantly at him and he wondered what his little sunshine wanted. "Kiss mommy! Lila's daddy always kiss her mommy!"

Natasha looked uncomfortable, but she rose on her tiptoes to peck his cheek for a second. "See, we kissed. Now let's get you to kindergarten or Miss Wanda worries where you are!"

Steve still stared at her, feeling her lips on his skin again had felt so fucking good.

"Real kiss! Lips!" Sarah complained and stomped her foot.

Before he could really think about what he was doing, he leaned forward and kissed her very briefly. Sarah made a happy squeal and he and Natasha just looked at each other. Her cheeks were a bit pink and he wanted to kiss her again.

"Miss Wanda waiting!" Sarah yelled, interrupting the moment between her parents.

"Alright, we're going." He laughed when Sarah tugged on his hand. "I'll see you, Nat." He said softly and she smiled.

"Have a good day, Steve."

* * *

"How did you feel when Sarah called you daddy?" Bruce, Steve's therapist, asked him during their weekly session.

"Amazing, I just felt like I was going to combust with all that happiness inside me. I'm so happy that she sees me as her dad now. That she understands who I am to her." He said with a smile on his face.

"And how did you feel when you read Natasha's journal?"

"I wished I had been there for everything. I wished I had seen Natasha with her baby bump, had been there for Sarah's birth. Heard her first word. I missed all those things and I'm never getting that back. But I also know that I wouldn't have been able to come home and I would have missed all those things anyway. I would have had to desert and I don't know if I could have done that. Being a soldier was all I wanted when I was a kid. I wanted to follow my dad's footsteps and Nat knew that..." He sighed. "Everything is just so messed up. I would have missed everything either way. Seeing Sarah just on Skype wouldn't have been enough..."

"So you can understand why Natasha had been scared to tell you about the pregnancy." Bruce asked carefully.

"I guess so. I can understand that she had been in a very difficult situation and I'm glad that she decided to have the baby."

"I know that Natasha has hurt you a lot, but I could also see that she feels very guilty about everything when she joined us. You can either hold onto that forever or you are willing to move on. Punishing Natasha will also hurt you and Sarah. And you said that you still love her? Will you ever tell her that?" Bruce's voice was always so smooth and relaxing, and he helped Steve to see every angle.

"I kissed her." He blurted out.

If Bruce was surprised, he didn't show it. "Really? When did that happen?"

"A few days ago. Sarah actually wanted us to kiss and Nat kissed my cheek, but Sarah wasn't happy and I just...I just kissed her. It was only a peck on the lips, but it felt really good. I wanted to kiss her again."

"Did you?"

"No." He chuckled. "Sarah wanted to go to the kindergarten."

"Do you still want to kiss Natasha again?"

He didn't have to think about that. "Yes, but I don't know if I should."

"You are entitled to feel the way you want to feel. It's okay if you're not ready to explore your feelings with Natasha together. And it's also okay if you want to be with her. No one can tell you what to do or what is right for you except yourself, Steve. What are you afraid could happen?"

"I don't know. I wanted this for so long and now we have a child and I feel like it's another sign that we should be together, but I just...I never thought she would do what she did to me."

"Do you trust Natasha?"

"Of course."

"Do you think she would ever keep something this big from you again?"

"No." He said immediately. "I know she learned from her mistake."

"Could you ever see yourself falling in love with someone else? Or Natasha being with something else?"

"No." The last question made him jealous. He didn't want another man in Natasha's life. Or his daughter's life.

Bruce smiled softly. "Love is painful. Loving someone means that they have the power to hurt you like no one else can. You're hurting and Natasha is hurting. You can both keep hurting or decide to move on." Bruce looked at his watch. "Our time is up for today. I want you to think about what we talked about today."

"I will." Steve nodded and stood up. "Thanks for your time, doc."

His phone buzzed in his pocket on his way out and he answered it when he saw that Natasha was calling him.

"Hello?"

"Want to go to Tony Island, daddy?" Sarah asked him excitedly and he had to smile. God, she was so freaking cute.

"Coney Island!" He heard Natasha correct her in the background.

"Coney Island! You want go? Me and mommy?"

"I'd love to!" He wanted to say more, but Sarah had already hung up. _Huh_? His phone rang again a minute later and he answered it. "Yes, sweetie?"

"Uh, it's me." Natasha said. "Sarah doesn't really get how a phone call works, I'm afraid. Do you want to meet us there or do you want to go together?"

"I can come to you and we take the subway together." He offered because he didn't want his girls to take the subway alone. Some strange people lived in New York. "I can be there in fifteen minutes."

"Okay. I'll let Sarah know. She's very excited. She's never been to Coney Island. See you in fifteen minutes."

And now Steve was excited that he would be there to experience Sarah's first visit to Coney Island. He'd always loved it there as a kid and he remembered on his way to Natasha's apartment that he and Natasha had kissed for the first time at Coney Island when they had been teenagers. She had been his first kiss and now she was the mother of his child.

Sarah opened the door for him and he grinned when he saw how cute she looked today. Her hair was in two little pigtails on top of her head and she wore a cute dress with tights and tiny sneakers and asked him to help her into her jean jacket.

"Thanks, daddy."

He smiled when she slung her Stitch bag over her shoulder. Natasha came into the hallway and her beauty took his breath away like it did every time he saw her.

"Hi." She gave him a shy smile and he wondered how she felt about the kiss. "I'm really glad that you could make it."

Sarah was sitting on his lap while they took the subway to Coney Island and he listened to her as she was telling him what she wanted to see. It surprised him every time how much Sarah actually knew about him, even though he had only been her mother's best friend when Natasha had talked about him. Sarah knew that he loved Coney Island and that he had been there tons of times as a kid with Bucky and then later with Natasha.

God, they had so much fun at Coney Island. Sarah had big eyes and wanted to see everything. She tried cotton candy for the first time and shoved her entire face into it because she thought that it would be fluffy and cried when it was only sticky and she had it all over her face. She squealed happily when she was riding the children's merry-go-round and he and Natasha took as many photos as possible. He won a teddy bear for Sarah that she gave it to her mother because she didn't want Stitch to be jealous.

Sarah was already sleeping in his arms when they walked up the stairs to Natasha's apartment. She was grumpy when Natasha woke her up to brush her teeth and to change into her jammies, but she fell asleep again as soon as he and Nat tucked her in.

"I had a great time today, Nat." He told her while she walked him to her door.

"Me, too." She smiled. "And Sarah had a blast. We should do it again sometime."

"Yes. Has she been to the Niagara Falls before? We could rent a cabin in the area, so she can see real nature? I'm sure they make some kind of hiking seat so I can carry her on my back when she gets tired."

Natasha looked nervous. "Are you sure you want to share a cabin with me?"

"I wouldn't have asked otherwise." He assured her and Natasha relaxed. "I want to go hiking with my family."

"Sarah's never been before. I'm not sure if she's gonna like it."

"Then let's find out together."

"Okay." She nodded and smiled. "A grumpy toddler is no picnic, though."

"I'll take my chances." He chuckled and kissed her cheek. "Goodnight, Nat."

She seemed surprised by that and her cheeks were a little bit pink. "Goodnight, Steve."

* * *

Buying hiking gear for two adults and a toddler turned out to be quite expensive and they only bought boots, jackets, a backpack and a hiking carrier for Sarah to sit in when she got tired. And they had to rent a SUV (Natasha's car was too tiny and Steve only had a bike) and the cabin. He wondered how families with a low income were supposed to offer their kids trips like that.

Sarah just looked darn cute in her little boots and jacket and she squealed happily when Steve gave her a Stitch baseball cap to protect her from the sun.

They sang Disney songs in the car and Steve tried to explain to Sarah again that the Niagara Falls weren't just a shower because that had been her conclusion when he'd explained waterfalls to her.

The cabin had two bedrooms and he helped Natasha assemble Sarah's portacrib in her room while Sarah rolled around on the grown up bed. They agreed to hike to the Falls tomorrow and decided to visit an animal park near by.

Sarah asked on their way to the park if they had pigeons and Steve barely contained his laughter. Of course, Sarah wanted to see them instead of bears or lynx.

Their little girl started crying when they told her that she couldn't pet a grizzly, let alone take one home with her. Natasha and he laughed more than they should when Sarah observed that lynx were weird looking cats and Simba was way prettier. She barked at the wolves and was very pleased when one of them started to howl and she howled back. They played with Sarah on the playground before they had to return to the cabin if they didn't want to walk through a dark forest.

Sarah babbled about everything that she saw while he carried her on his shoulders and Natasha reminded Sarah that she would have go to bed soon.

"Not sleepy, mommy!" She complained. She fell asleep five minutes later.

It was his turn to get Sarah ready for bed and she wasn't very happy to get woken up again, but her teeth had to be brushed and her clothes had to get changed. He kissed her forehead when her eyes were closed again and he left the bedroom, leaving the door an inch open so they could hear her if she needed them.

Natasha was sitting in front of the fire when he came into the main room, taking a sip from her wine. "She's sleeping again?"

"Yup, she fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow."

Natasha chuckled lightly before she looked at him with a serious expression on her face. "I can go to my room, Steve. I know that the atmosphere is weird without Sarah as a buffer."

"No, please stay, Nat. I want to spend time with you and Sarah. I miss my best friend." He said softly and sat down next to her. "I want to move forward."

She looked at him with tears in his eyes and he thought against the urge to wrap his arms around her. "I want that, too. But can you ever forgive me?"

He thought a lot about that since his talk with Bruce. And he now knew the answer to that question. "Yes. I forgive you. I don't want to be mad at you anymore. I don't want to punish you. I want to enjoy what we have. The family that we are. I want to leave the past behind us and move forward. We're parents now and we have to be a team, we have to be a unit."

"Thank you, Steve." Natasha whispered, wiping a tear away. "Thank you for letting me back into your life and giving me a chance. Thank you for forgiving me. I promise you that I will never keep anything from you ever again. I missed you every single day and I'm so happy that you're back. And you're such a great dad."

"I'm so glad that I have a child with _you_." He confessed truthfully. "The beginning hasn't been ideal. But I know how lucky I am that the mother of my child is my best friend."

"You think that we became best friends so we could have Sarah one day?"

"No, I think we became best friends because we're soulmates and Sarah is the result of that special connection."

" _Soulmates_?" Natasha gasped.

"I've been in love with you since you walked into our classroom all those years ago." He whispered and placed his hand over hers that was next to him. "I love you, Natasha. And I love that we have a child together."

She whispered his name softly when he cupped her cheek with his other hand and leaned towards her. She closed her eyes and he brushed his lips against hers briefly before he pressed his lips completely on her mouth, really kissing her. She sighed into the kiss and scooted closer to him until she was completely in his arms. Kissing Natasha felt right, this was what he always had wanted and the fact that their daughter was sleeping in the next room just made it perfect. The three of them were a family and nothing would ever keep them away from each other.

"I love you, Steve." Natasha breathed before she kissed him again.

"I love you." He whispered against her lips and they both smiled.

He was about to deepen the kiss when they heard Sarah. "Mooooommy! Poooootty!"

Natasha chuckled, resting her forehead against his. "That's my cue." She pecked his lips before she stood up to take care of their daughter. He watched her leave the room with a smile on his face.

She had been gone longer than he thought she'd be and he decided to check on his girls. He found them on Natasha's bed, cuddling. Sarah was wide awake and telling her mom about her dream.

"Daddy!" She beamed when she noticed him. "Snuggle!"

Natasha smiled and moved Sarah and herself to make room for him. He got onto the bed and pulled both his girls into his arms. Sarah seemed to sense that something had changed between her parents and she seemed very happy about it. She made kissing noises and Natasha kissed her cheek before she kissed him on the lips.

And he had never been more happy than he was in that moment with the two people he loved more than anything in the world. Sarah mumbled something while she was falling asleep again and he looked at Natasha who had never looked more beautiful.

"Ohana." She whispered, rubbing her hand over Sarah's back.

"Ohana." He agreed with a smile on his face.

"Ohana." Sarah mumbled before she nuzzled her perfect little face into his chest.


	92. The good doctor (AU)

_AU Natasha needs a veterinarian for her cat and ends up in Steve Rogers's practice._

* * *

Natasha was glad that she was finally home after a long day at work and she just wanted to soak in her bathtub. She was incredibly grateful that she had gotten the job as Pepper Potts's PA, but it was sometimes really stressful.

She unlocked her door and called for her cat, Liho, but got no answer. Was she sleeping? She walked further into the apartment and found Liho laying on the living room carpet, whimpering. Shit, what happened?

"What's wrong, sweetie?" She ran to Liho and stepped onto something and yelled in pain. What the fuck! She could even feel it through the sole of her heels. She looked down and saw that she stepped on a _Lego_. Oh _no_ , had Liho found the birthday gift for Lila and _ate_ it?

She gently picked Liho up to get her into her transportation box. "Did you tear into the lego package?" She asked, but Liho only whimpered more. Shit, shit. Could she _die_ from this? She put Liho into the box and called the vet only to hear the voicemail telling her that Dr. Banner was on vacation. She wrote the first number of his covers and called them. They told her to come immediately and she changed into sneakers and ran with Liho's box pressed against her body to the practice since it was just a block away and she'd never get a cab in time.

Dr. Rogers must have just recently opened the practice because she never heard of him before. She told the receptionist her name and was told that Rogers would be soon with her. She thanked her and walked into the waiting room that was full of women. Weird.

She found an empty chair and sat down, whispering to Liho to calm her down. A few minutes later they were called and she was waiting for the vet in the examinations room. God, she hoped that he could help her Liho. She'd had Liho since she'd moved to New York, she had been her first friend here.

She got Liho out of her box and swaddled her against her chest and walked with her around the room, hoping that it was soothing for her and distracted her from the pain.

The door opened and a man came in. A _really_ attractive man came in. Natasha would have laughed if she hadn't been so scared for Liho's life. He was the reason why there were so many women in the waiting room.

"Natasha and Liho Romanoff?" He asked, looking up from his chart. Oh, he had really pretty eyes.

She nodded. "Yes, thank you for squeezing me in."

He offered her his hand. " I'm Steve Rogers. No problem, ma'am." He looked at Liho. "And you think the little one ate Legos?"

"There were scattered all over the floor. And she's whimpering in pain and not really herself."

He nodded. "We'll get an x-ray to confirm it. We have to see how many are in her and where they are right now. We might have to remove them via surgery, Miss Romanoff. Is she a friendly cat or do you want to bring her to the x ray room?"

"Can I?"

He smiled at her warmly. "Of course. Follow me."

As it turned out, Liho's little stomach was full of Legos and Rogers decided to get her into the OR right now to remove them. She was offered that they could call her after the surgery, but she wanted to wait here for news.

Natasha sat down in the waiting room, trying not to think about her little furball getting cut open. How the fuck did she open the sideboard and got the package open? Why hadn't Natasha hid the present somewhere else? Why did she have to buy Lego for Lila and not something else? God, she felt so fucking guilty! This was all her fault!

Her guilt trip was interrupted by the conversation of two women next to her.

"Do you think he's gay? I mean I was wearing this top that make my boobs look real good and he didn't even glance at them! I mean, hello! Have you looked at me?!" One of them exclaimed and Natasha rolled her eyes.

"Nah, he's not gay! I caught him staring at my ass!" The other one said and Natasha didn't believe her. She had no idea why, but she knew that the woman was lying. Probably to make herself feel better and her friend jealous. "He's gonna ask me out soon, I know it."

The other one scoffed. "Please, you have no ass. There's nothing to stare at. And if he's gonna ask anyone out, it's gonna be me. No guy can resist me!"

"Romanoff?"

Natasha looked up and the receptionist was smiling at her. That was a good sign, right?

"Yes?" She stood up and walked over to the older woman. "Is Liho okay?"

The woman nodded. "Yes. She's waking up now." Natasha sighed in relief. "She's in our infirmary. She has to stay the night. I take you to her so you can say goodnight. I think my son is still in there so he can tell you about the surgery."

Natasha followed her. "Your son?"

"Oh, yes." The woman smiled. "I'm Steve's mother. Nepotism got me the job." She laughed and winked.

Natasha's eyes fell to the name tag on her chest. Sarah Rogers. "I'm sorry, I didn't know your name. How rude. I don't know where my head-"

"Don't worry, dear. You're here because you worry about your little fur baby and not..." Mrs. Rogers sighed and Natasha realized that she knew why most of the women were actually here. God, it was kind of pathetic. Did their pets even need the appointments?

Dr. Rogers was kneeling down in front of one of the glass boxes and talking. He looked up and smiled at her. "Ah, look, there she is, Liho."

She basically ran the rest to him to see Liho for herself. She was waking up, but still very groggy. "Hi, there. You got me really worried."

"I pulled 11 Legos out of her stomach. There were no complications and she should fully recover."

"Oh, thank God. Thank you so much, Dr. Rogers!"

"It's my job." He chuckled, standing up. "She has to stay the night, but you should be able to pick her up tomorrow. She'll have to wear a cone. Has she ever had one before?"

"No." Natasha said, already knowing that Liho would fight her on this.

"I'll show you how to get her into it." He said and Natasha nodded her thanks. "You can say goodnight to her. Just remember to leave your contact info at the reception so we can reach you."

"Yes. And thank you. For saving her."

He smiled. "You're welcome. Goodnight, Na-Miss Romanoff."

Liho opened her eyes in that moment and meowed weakly when she recognized her. "Hey, you little idiot. Who eats 11 Legos?"

She heard Rogers and his mother laugh and almost missed how his mother asked him why he didn't let Darcy put on the cone like she always did. Liho meowed again and Natasha cooed at her, not paying attention to both Rogers as they left the infirmary.

* * *

Pepper Potts was a nice boss and gave Natasha the next two days off so she could take care of Liho. Natasha already knew that sneaky Liho would try to get out of that cone.

She came to the practice after work and Sarah, as she told Natasha to call her, said that she could already go to examination room 2 and that her son would be soon with her. Natasha was glad that she didn't need to be in that waiting room full of horny women.

She smiled brightly when Rogers came in with Liho in her transportation box and the cat meowed loudly when she heard Natasha's voice. "Sounds like she's better?"

He nodded. "Almost seems like she didn't have surgery 24 hours ago. Ready to try to get that cone on her?"

"Sure."

He opened the box and Natasha picked Liho to press a kiss on her head. "I was really worried, you dumbass. Don't ever do that again."

It took them twenty minutes to get Liho into that cone. She was a sneaky bastard and she was _fast_. Natasha's forehead was sweaty and Rogers was panting a little bit. Liho was pissed and pouting, but at least the cone was on and she was back into her box. Natasha already knew that the cat would take her anger out on the furniture later.

"Man, that was...something." Rogers chuckled. "I think Liho is the fastest cat that I have ever seen."

"I'm training her for the Cat Olympics." She said in a serious tone and he snorted.

"Cat Olympics, ha. Do they have one for dogs? Maybe mine can compete. He can sleep nine hours or more without waking up once. That's talent, right?"

She laughed and he grinned. "Do you treat your own dog?"

"God _no_. I can't give the little guy a shot. Not when he gives me the puppy dog look. And I don't want him to hate me! I don't even go with him to the vet, because I hate it when he whines. Bucky always has to take him."

 _Bucky?_ That was definitely a guy's name. "Is Bucky your boyfriend?"

"No. He's my best friend. We live together. He works from home which is good since I'm here at the practice a lot."

"I feel guilty about leaving Liho alone so much-" She admitted quietly."But I worked my ass off for my current job. And I got student loans to pay off."

"You've had her for, what, seven years?" He asked and she nodded. "So, she's used to it. Pets eat stuff that they're not supposed to. Things like that happen. You just have to turn your back for two minutes and they already ate something bad. Is she acting strange? Peeing on your carpet or losing a lot of fur?"

"No."

"Then you shouldn't worry about it. Every animal is different and Liho loves you." He smiled. "You're a good cat mom."

"Thanks. And Pepper gave me the next days off, so I can take care of Liho."

"Pepper?" He repeated and looked confused for a second. "You don't happen to work for Pepper _Potts_?"

"Uh, yes. I'm her PA. You know her?"

"Yes." He laughed. "Tony is a good friend."

Okay, he really didn't seem like someone who would get along with someone like Stark who was... _a lot_. "Huh, what a small world."

"Yeah!" He seemed really happy that they knew the same people. "Are you invited to their spring party?"

"No. I _work_ for Pepper, I'm not her friend." She laughed a little. "I help to plan it, though."

"Oh." He looked disappointed for some reason. "I just thought it would be cool if we would run into each other there."

Liho made an unhappy sound in her box, reminding Natasha that it was time to get her home. "I should go."

"Yes, yes, of course. Don't forget to make an appointment with my mom for the stitches."

"I will. And thank you."

He smiled. "No need to thank me. It's literally my job."

She returned his smile and left the room.

* * *

It was Sunday afternoon, fours days after the surgery, when Natasha came back from the supermarket and found blood spots on her carpet.

"Liho?" She dropped her shopping tote and searched for her cat. She found Liho on her cat tree, the cone on the floor, and the cat was licking her open wound. Shit! She must have popped a stitch or something. Fuck! Wasn't cat saliva filled with tons of bacteria?!

"Stop that, you stupid cat!" She chided Liho, picking up the blanket on the sofa and wrapping Liho in it before she could escape. She got her phone out and called Rogers's practice. No one picked up. Shit, today was Sunday. Of course it was closed today. Fuck! She was about to hang up to call the animal clinic, when someone did pick up.

"Hello?"

"Uh, hi. This is Natasha Romanoff and-"

"Oh, Natasha, dear." She now recognized Sarah Rogers's voice. "Everything okay?"

"No! Liho got out of the cone and the wound is open and she licked it and isn't cat saliva dangerous-"

"I'm at home right now- we have a call diversion, I'll let Steve know and he'll meet you at the practice. Okay, honey?"

She nodded until she realized that Sarah couldn't see her. "Yes, thank you so much."

"It's not a problem. I'll call Steve now and he'll be there shortly. Take care, sweetheart." Sarah hang up and Natasha quickly got Liho (under a lot of protest) into her box, grabbed her wallet and phone, and jogged to the practice.

Rogers wasn't there yet and she sat down on the stairs in front of the building. "Why did you have to do that, you brat?" Liho just meowed, she didn't seem bothered by the fact that she was bleeding. And Natasha was more worried about the wound getting infected and Liho getting sepsis.

"Hey."

She looked up to see Rogers standing in front of her. "I came as quickly as I could."

"Thank you so much!" She stood up and he took the transportation box from her. He looked so different in normal clothes. He really was a very attractive man.

"Was she bleeding a lot?"

"There were a few spots on my carpet and on the cat tree." She answered him, following him into an examination room. An empty veterinary practice was kinda creepy.

"This happens a lot. I wouldn't worry too much, Nat-Miss Romanoff." He smiled sheepishly. "Sorry."

"No, no. Please, call me Natasha. You made sure that Liho can still participate in the Cat Olympics after all." Was she flirting with him?!

"Well, in that case...Only if you call me Steve." He blushed a little which was adorable. "I'll clean the wound and redo the stitches. I'll give you antibiotics to make sure that the wound doesn't inflame."

"Thanks, Steve. Really. For coming in on your free day. I hope your girlfriend won't be mad." Okay, wow. Now she was trying to find out if he was taken. What was wrong with her?

"I don't...There's no one who's gonna be mad."

"Good." He looked almost amused while he was trying to get Liho out of the box who was having none of it. "Well, I mean good that no one's gonna be mad at you, of course!"

They managed to get Liho out and Steve assured her again that it wasn't that bad. He cleaned the wound, redid two stitches, and they put the cone back on Liho again, and Steve recommended to put Liho into some sort of onesie so she couldn't get to her wound.

"Uh... do you..."

Steve looked up from the computer because he had to update Liho's file. "Yeah?"

"Are you free right now? I could make you dinner... as a thank you? I mean it's almost six and if you're not..." God, she had never been this awkward when she'd asked out a guy before. Wait, she was asking him out?

"I'd love to!" He smiled at her and Natasha felt less awkward.

He took Liho's box and carried it all the way back to her apartment. He gave Liho the antibiotics and he even helped Natasha make dinner. He was funny and sweet, he helped her with the dishes and asked her if he could see her again, without a cat emergency as he'd put it. He didn't try to kiss her when she walked him to her door which she appreciated a lot since it would have been way too soon for that. She had a good feeling about him. He was one of the good ones.

* * *

Dating Steve was great. It was more than great. He was such a sweet guy who treated her so well and she liked him a lot. They had only been seeing each other for two months, but she could really see this going somewhere with him. They had so much fun together and they talked about everything and anything. She hadn't felt like this in forever. His mother had practically adopted her when she'd heard that Natasha had no parents anymore, and her best friends liked Steve a lot after meeting him for the first time last week.

And Liho was doing great. Her wound had healed nicely and she'd gotten used to Steve staying over. She hadn't been a fan of her new veterinarian coming over so often at the beginning, but she'd seemed to realize that Steve came over for Natasha and not her. And Steve's dog was just the cutest and she almost liked him better than Steve, not that she would tell him that.

Natasha came with Liho to the practice for the cat's annual shots and was greeted by a smiling Sarah who invited her over for a Sunday brunch.

"You can come with or without my son, sweetheart." She said with a wink and Natasha laughed.

She walked to the waiting room, almost grinning, because Steve was sure that Liho would have her revenge for poking her with a needle later, when he'd at least suspect it. Did he think that the little furball was going to kill him in his sleep? God, he was such a dork.

The waiting room was, of course, full of women (okay, there were two men, and a kid with a dog) and Natasha rolled her eyes. Steve had told her that he was aware that those women wanted him, but he had never been interested in one of them. Well, until her, as he'd admitted her with pink cheeks.

Natasha sat down, placing Liho's box in front of her, and noticed that the two women from her first time visit were here as well. They were both pretty dolled up for a appointment at the vet. Natasha smirked when a thought crossed her mind.

"Romanoff?"

She smiled when she saw that Steve himself came to get her. All women immediately sat up straight and smiled at him. Natasha picked up Liho's box and walked over to Steve.

He took the heavy box from her as soon as she was standing in front of him. "Hi."

"Hi. Do you trust me?"

"Of course." He answered, looking a little bit confused. She smiled and rose to her tiptoes to peck his lips. He smiled into the kiss and kissed her a little longer than she thought he would. "I know what you're doing."

She grinned when she heard the female groans of disappointment behind them, but she didn't care. She didn't care one bit.


	93. Food is love (AU)

_AU Natasha Romanoff and Steve Rogers compete against each other in a cooking show._

* * *

Natasha had learned how to cook from her father Nick. It had been the one thing they had bonded over after he'd brought her from Russia to the States and she had hated here everything and just wanted to go back. It had been in his kitchen where she had learned what being loved by someone meant and she always thought about her father every time she cooked. She'd briefly considered becoming a professional chef, but she knew how hard the business was, and she ended up working for a non profit organization. But she still loved to cook for her friends and family in her free time.

It had been more of a joke when she'd applied to participate in _Kitchen Battle_ , the number one cooking show hosted by Tony Stark, so she had been more than surprised when she'd gotten the mail that they wanted her on the show. The winner would get 10,000$ and Natasha wanted to use that money for a trip through Europe to learn more about its various cuisines. She had already saved some money and she was lucky that she didn't have to pay rent because her father had gifted her his apartment after he'd decided that he had enough of New York and moved to Rhode Island, but traveling through Europe was fucking expensive.

There would be five other candidates and the show would keep her busy for four weeks if she got to the final round. Fortunately she had a nice boss who allowed her to work a little less during those weeks since she would have to prepare herself for each show if she wanted to win this thing. Tapping was always on Saturday which was good since she had the weekends off anyway.

She packed her kitchen knives into her backpack and took a cab to the studio. Today, she would meet the other contestants and get a look behind the scenes. Tomorrow was already the first tapping where they had to cook their favorite dish for the jury.

A production assistant led her to the set where already four of the other candidates were. Two women, named Wanda and Val, and a guy named Bruce. The last one of the group had apparently already called to let the studio know that he was going to be a bit late because of traffic. Natasha liked the other candidates. They seemed ambitious, but not like they were secretly assholes who would sabotage the others. Wanda was a student, Val worked as a martial arts trainer and at a bar, and Bruce was a scientist.

They got familiar with the studio and their kitchen islands, and checked the grocery lists so everything would be there tomorrow for the first challenge. God, she was already so nervous!

Natasha was going over her item list with the PA Darcy, when someone joined the group.

"I'm so sorry that I'm so late!" She looked up and a man came into the studio. He was tall and, Natasha couldn't help but notice, very handsome. "There was an accident on the Brooklyn Bridge."

"What a beefcake!" Darcy whispered to her before she focused on the man. "You must be Steve Rogers?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Give me a second and I'll show you around." Darcy said sweetly and Natasha chuckled to herself. She couldn't blame the girl, he was really good looking. Steve smiled at her and she gave him a smile in return. He seemed nice so far, hopefully he wasn't a dick in disguise.

Darcy looked back at her and they went over the rest of the list before she told Steve to follow her so she could show him everything. Natasha watched the two until they were out of her sight. God, he was really hot. And his smile was very nice. She shook her head. She wasn't here to meet a guy, she was here to cook and to, hopefully, win a ton of money.

Bruce suggested that they could all go together to a tapas bar to get to know each other a little. Natasha agreed because it was a good idea. Just because they were competing against each other, didn't mean that they shouldn't get along. The others also agreed and they found a tapas bar near by.

She learned that Bruce spent most of the year in India to help people, that Val was a vet just like her wife Carol, and that Wanda was a twin and originally from Sokovia. Steve was also a vet and worked as an illustrator. They all seemed like really great people and it was almost a shame that they were competitors.

Natasha didn't sleep well that night because she was so nervous, but she was a big girl and focused on the task before her. She was going to make her father's favorite dish- rump steak with aligot and a red wince sauce. Natasha knew that it wasn't the most complicated dish, but that didn't mean it wasn't delicious. She'd rather cook something simple than choose something complex and lose the first round.

They met Tony Stark, the host of the show, before the beginning of the tapping and he was quite the character, but Natasha liked him. She checked to see if every ingredient was here and was more than relieved when it was. She would nail this. The audience was only a crowd of fifty people much to Natasha's relief. Too many people would only make her more nervous. She was already trying to ignore the fact that millions of people were going to watch the episode tomorrow night.

Stark introduced them to the audience and the women seemed to really like Steve. Not that Natasha could blame them. He was a very attractive guy and the fact that he was going to make his mother's lasagna probably made the women swoon. Stark told them to get to their kitchen islands and then the clock was already ticking. She took a deep breath and got started. She had one hour to make the perfect dinner.

She was going to start with the red wine sauce, so it could simmer while she was doing the rest. She peeled and cut the shallots to saute them before she added salt, pepper, rosemary and garlic. She poured vinegar to it and let it boil until it looked like syrup and it was time for the red wine. She had just added it when Tony showed up at her kitchen island.

"How is it going, Natasha?"

"Good." She looked briefly up to smile at him before she focused back on peeling the potatoes and cutting them into small piece so they would cook faster.

"I've heard that you learned cooking from your dad?"

"Yes. He thought it was a good way to bond with me. To introduce me to America. He adopted me when I was seven. He showed me what family means." The audience awed.

"You're from Russia, right?"

"Yep." She said, while tossing the potatoes into the boiling water.

"You know, that I basically have to call you Anastasia, right? The red hair, the green eyes...Have you found your Dimitri yet?" Stark quipped, causing the audience to laugh, and Natasha stopped herself in time before she rolled her eyes. The cameras were everywhere!

"Nope. The whole Rasputin curse thing makes it kinda hard to meet a guy, you know?" She deadpanned and Tony seemed to be caught off guard for a moment. The audience was laughing and Natasha was pretty sure that Steve laughed as well.

"Well, then I let you get back to work before the curse gets me." He looked like he collected himself and walked over to Bruce.

She knew that the back and forth with the host was big part of the show, but it was hard to do it while cooking. She didn't want to make any mistakes. She checked the clock and saw that they had only thirty minutes left.

She check the potatoes, but they still needed some time. It wasn't time yet for the steaks, so she was going to grate the cheese for the aligot now. She looked and looked, but there was no cheese grater on her kitchen island. She looked around and found one in the giant cupboard behind her. And naturally it was up way too high for her. Great! Maybe she could get it if she'd jumped...

Nope, she couldn't get it. She was about to ask for help, when a hand was suddenly grabbing the grater and handing it to her.

"Here." She turned around and came face to face with Steve. God, his eyes had such a nice blue color. And his lashes were so long! "There you go."

"Thank you!" She whispered and he smiled at her.

"No problem!"

"Oh!" Tony suddenly yelled and she and Steve both jumped a little bit. "Have you found your Dimitri? He's not opening secret doors for you, but getting the cheese grater. Romance really downgraded in the last one hundred years, didn't it?"

The audience laughed and this time Natasha did roll her eyes. Steve chuckled, obviously agreeing with her.

Natasha's dish was a success and so was Steve's lasagna which smelled amazing. Unfortunately one of them had to leave and it was Val. She didn't seem to mind too much and Natasha promised her to visit her at the gym because she wanted to get back into martial arts.

* * *

Natasha didn't have too much work the following week, she only had to supervise an event where kids could draw with artists. She planned to only stay for awhile and then go home to test cook her meal for the next show. They were supposed to make a first course and a main course, and Natasha had decided to make salmon tartar and beef wellington. She hoped that Maria, her roommate and good friend, was in the mood for that.

She was currently going over the attendance list when she noticed a familiar name. Steve Rogers. Was it just a coincidence or was is the Steve she knew? Her question was answered when she heard his voice behind her.

"Natasha?"

She turned around and smiled. "Hi! Fancy meeting you here!"

"Yeah! Hi!" He seemed happy to see her. "What are you doing here? Are you a drawer, too?"

"God, no. I have zero talent when it comes to this. No, I planned the thing."

He nodded. "Right, you mentioned that you worked for a non profit. So, are you ready for Saturday?"

"I hope so. I'm gonna cook my course later tonight and use my roommate as my guinea pig."

He laughed. "Yeah, my best friend is complaining that he won't fit in his pants soon if I keep cooking for him."

"It was really good to see you, Steve. But I have to get back to work and you should probably get ready for the kids."

"Yeah, you're right. See you."

She nodded with a smile and left to search for her assistant Daisy. How funny it was to run into one of the contestants outside of the show.

Natasha wasn't able to leave sooner because Daisy had a family emergency and had to leave, so she stayed until the event was over. She was tired and not in the mood for cooking, she would just do it tomorrow. She just wanted to go home and watch something on Netflix.

"Hey, you're still here." Steve approached her while she was cleaning up a little.

"Yeah, something came up and I had to stay."

He rubbed the back of his neck. "Look, I know that we're competitors...but do you wanna grab a bite to eat? There's a great pizza place around the corner."

Well, she was hungry and Steve seemed like nice company. "Yeah, sure. Why not."

"Great!" He beamed at her and he even helped her tidy up.

They decided to take the pizza to go and ended up in a little park on a bench. Steve was right and the pizza was really good and she learned a little bit more about him. He'd joined the Army right after high school and went to art school after he'd left. He had been raised by a single mother and she'd died five years ago.

"I'm so sorry for your loss." She whispered sadly because she couldn't even imagine a world without her grumpy, old dad.

"Thank you. I love cooking because it reminds me of her. She spent hours in the kitchen, singing and creating the most amazing dishes. She always said that food was love."

"I think she's right. I learned to trust and, eventually, to love my adoptive father through cooking. The first thing we did together was to make cheeseburgers. Real American cheeseburgers. It was a big deal for me." She told him, the memory causing her to smile softly.

"Do you miss it? Russia?"

"No, not really. I was glad when I could leave. I hated it at the orphanage and I thought I was stuck there forever because I wasn't a cute baby, but then my dad came and got me out of there."

"He sounds like a great guy."

"He's the best."

They finished the pizza, talking a little bit about the show and how surreal it was to be actually on it, and then Steve offered to walk her home.

"I live in Manhattan, not here in Brooklyn. That's a pretty long walk." She laughed and Steve blushed a little.

"Oh, yeah, you're right."

"Thanks for the offer, though." She had to grin, because Steve looked adorable being all flustered. "You can walk me to the subway station?"

"Yeah, I can do that."

They shared stories about their work and Steve waited until her train arrived.

"Goodnight, Steve. I had a really good time."

"Me, too. It was great running into you."

"Yes. See you on Sunday!"

He smiled at her and her heart fluttered a little bit. Shit, stop that! "Goodnight, Natasha."

* * *

Tony seemed to have bonded with Bruce and was mostly talking to him during the next tapping which was fine by Natasha. It meant that she could focus on her cooking. The salmon tartar was already done and in the fridge, and now she had to cover her tenderloin with puff pastry and coat it with yolk. She was putting the beef wellington into the oven when Tony appeared next to her. Damn, she'd hoped he was going to leave her alone. Talking while cooking was a bit much.

"How is it going, Anastasia?"

God, she hated that nickname! "So far so good. I have to check on it regularly and hope I get it out at the right moment."

"What are you serving with it?"

"Glazed carrots with thyme."

"Sounds delicious! So I've heard about you that you're a dancer?"

"That's correct." She said while washing the carrots. "I've considered to go to Juilliard, but I decided to do something different."

Tony grinned. "Did you know that Steve over there can't dance? Maybe you can teach your Dimitri some moves?"

The audience seemed to really like the idea because they were hollering and clapping. She wouldn't mind showing Steve to dance, but they were both a bit busy at the moment right now!

"Sure, another time, though. The food doesn't cook itself."

"That's true." Tony said. "Or otherwise I wouldn't have to order so much."

Thankfully he left her alone after that to go talk to Wanda about her studies. She looked over to Steve who was smiling at her when their eyes met. Yeah, she wouldn't mind teaching him to dance at all.

Steve and her managed to get to the next show, just like Wanda. Bruce had to leave and Natasha was a bit sad. He was a nice guy and didn't seem to mind that he lost.

Wanda had been picked up by her brother and Natasha and Steve were left alone to wait for their town cars that would take them home. She was glad that the studio provided that service, because she wasn't in the mood to wait ages for a cab or an Uber to arrive.

"I'm really happy that you're in the next round." Steve told her while they waited.

"Me, too. Uh, I mean that you're as well." She laughed nervously. She hoped that her first statement didn't make him think that she had been talking about herself.

"I know what you meant, don't worry." He shoved her gently with his elbow. "You don't have to teach me how to dance, you know that right? Tony just said it for show."

"I know, but I don't mind. I love dancing and I haven't really done it in ages."

Steve looked pretty happy with her answer. "Really? I mean...That would be great. I always felt too awkward to go to dancing classes...I could give you my number and we could...see when we both have time?"

"Yeah, let's do that." She nodded and they exchanged numbers. He opened the car door for her and closed it after wishing her a nice evening.

* * *

Natasha watched the episode with her friend Maria who didn't know yet that she'd made to the next round since everyone had to stay quiet. They sat on their couch with a big bowl of popcorn between them. Maria watched both the show and kept an eye on Twitter to find out what others thought about the episode.

"People are really into Steve and his boyish charm. Is he really that nice or is it just show?" Maria asked without looking up from her tablet.

"He's really like that, at least he gave me no reason to think otherwise." She answered, watching herself on TV. God, that was so strange.

"Women seem to like you and men are digging you." Maria laughed. "What a surprise! A lot are wondering if you're single...Ew, I wish I hadn't read that tweet. Some men are pigs!"

"What did he tweet?" She asked automatically.

"You don't want to know." They reached the part where Tony asked her if she wanted to teach Steve to dance. "Oh, Twitter really wants that to happen! A lot think that you'd make a cute couple!" Natasha rolled her eyes at Maria's statement. "So, are you gonna teach him how to dance?"

"Maybe. Probably. I mean we exchanged numbers."

"Oh, really?" She didn't have to look at Maria to know that she was grinning smugly.

"Yeah, really. Now watch the show if you wanna know if I made it."

Maria congratulated her to making it to the next round after the episode ended, telling her that she was definitely going to win. Natasha wasn't so sure about that though. Wanda was a good cook and Steve's food had gotten a lot of praise from the jurors so far.

She checked her phone to see what friends and family wrote about the episode and was surprised to find a message from Steve.

 _How is it that you look so cool and calm and I look so nervous?! Teach me your ways!_

She smiled. He had really come across a little bit nervous. She was nervous as well when they were tapping, but she had always been great at hiding her true feelings. It was just something that came with growing up in an orphanage.

 _I thought you wanted me to teach you how to dance? You add more to that and I have to start to charge you!;)_

She only noticed when her battery was almost dead that she and Steve had been texting for almost two hours.

 _My phone's almost dead. And I have to go to bed soon. You'll come by on Wednesday for your first lesson?_

 _Yes, I will. And again, thank you so much! Goodnight, Nat. Sweet dreams:)_

She fell asleep with a smile on her face that night.

* * *

Natasha did wonder if other contestants had met before in their free time, but she didn't really care about that. She didn't think that Steve was the guy to sabotage her somehow, so she would lose on Saturday. But she was glad that Maria would go after work to her yoga class and wouldn't be home before eight. She didn't need her friend to comment about Steve being here. Natasha had moved the couch and coffee table to the side so they would have enough room to dance. She was about to make some tea when the door bell rang. She buzzed in Steve, filled the kettle with water, and then he was already knocking on her door.

She opened the door and was again reminded how handsome he was. He really looked good in that leather jacket. "Hi!" He smiled warmly and helped a cake dome up. "I made my ma's lemon bars."

"I haven't had them in years!" She stepped aside to let him in. "I was just making us some tea. Please take a seat while I get it for us."

"I can help you." He offered, taking his leather jacket off. He was wearing a tight Henley shirt that was showing off his upper body very nicely. God, those arms!

She had to force herself to look up into his eyes. "I got it, but thanks for offering. I'll be right back." She said, quickly leaving to go to the kitchen. Okay, Natasha, get a fucking grip!

She had to admit that Steve's lemon bars were excellent. They had to make a dessert in the next show and that wasn't really one of Natasha's strong suits...She hoped that her Swiss chocolate cake with lavender rose ice cream was going to be a success. It sounded fancier than it actually was and it was honestly the only thing that she was good at, dessert wise.

"Your apartment is amazing!" He gushed, looking around. "I don't want to know how much you pay as rent!"

She laughed. "Nothing. I could never afford a place like this. My dad signed it over to me. He had enough of New York City and he didn't want to sell it. He owned it for over forty years and didn't want to have a stranger living in here."

"I get that. I thought about selling my ma's house after her death, but I just couldn't. She worked so hard to afford it and it felt wrong to have someone else live there. I asked my best friend if he wanted to move in with me and we renovated the whole house to make it our own, but my mom's spirit is still there." He smiled a little.

"What a great way to honor her."

"Thank you. So is your dad watching the show?"

She laughed. "Oh, yes. He told me that my beef wellington could have used a little bit more color."

"My mom always said that she was the better cook. And she was right." He chuckled and raised his tea mug. "To parents who know better."

"To parents who know better."

Steve had warned her that he had two left feet and unfortunately he was right. He stepped on her feet more than once, apologizing each time profoundly. It took some time, but then he seemed to get the hang of it and they swayed through her living room. He wasn't going to be the next Fred Astaire, but there was potential.

And she had to admit that it was quite nice to dance with Steve. She had a hand on his chest, his very muscular chest, and he'd wrapped his hand around hers and they danced to the slow music. His eyes never left hers and something in her chest was fluttering again. She didn't pull away when Steve lowered his head, his lips very close to her own. She closed the distance by kissing him softly.

* * *

How did one act after kissing another contestant on the show you were on? Natasha had no fucking clue. But she had to figure it out fast because she was supposed to be at the studio in two hours. What had she been thinking? How could she have just kissed him? Why had he kissed her back? Was he as confused as she was? They were competitors, they weren't even friends and she'd just kissed him? God, what was wrong with her?! She had to focus on the competition and not Steve's soft lips. Ugh!

Her phone rang and she knew without looking that it was Steve. He had been calling her since the whole kissing debacle. Actually, it had almost turned into something more than just kissing, but thankfully Maria had come home before Natasha could have done something even more stupid. Sleeping with the competition would have been royally stupid.

She managed to get to her little wardrobe at the studio without running into Steve. The contestants barely talked to each other during the show, so maybe she could get through the day without talking to him.

She changed her clothes and was checking her make up, when the door opened and, _SHIT_ , Steve was walking into her wardrobe. "I'm sorry to barge in like this, but you won't take my calls!"

"Steve!"

"We have to talk!"

She sighed and turned around. "I know, we can talk after the show!"

"No, you'll probably run off before I get the chance to talk to you!" He replied. He probably had a point. "I'm just getting straight to it, okay? I like you, Natasha. I wanna spend more time with you. I want to get to know you. I know the situation with us, competing against each other isn't ideal, but I...I would love to take you on a date tonight."

He liked her? Did she like him too? She probably did or she wouldn't have freaked out like she'd done. "One of us could lose tonight."

"Then the other one can cheer up the loser. It's just a game, Nat. I know ten grand is a lot of money, but it's not everything. I think this between us could really go somewhere."

"Do you like Sushi?" She asked quietly and Steve's whole face lit up. He was right. It was just a game in the end, and when was she going to meet such a sweet guy again?

"I love Sushi. So does that mean we're going on a date tonight?" He grinned happily.

"Yes, it does."

Neither of them lost that night. They both made it to the final round. Natasha got one more point from the jurors than Steve and won the competition. He congratulated her by kissing her and Twitter exploded, freaking out over the fact that Anastasia had found her Dimitri.

She used the price money to travel through Europe and Steve joined her for the last part of the trip. They traveled along the Amalfi coast and visited South Tuscany, eating, cooking and making love. And two years later they returned to Italy for their honeymoon, and nine months later they welcomed their daughter Sarah. Natasha was married to the most amazing man and had the sweetest little girl, and all thanks to a cooking show.


	94. Murder Mystery (AU)

_AU Natasha Romanoff gets send to a little town in Upstate New York to report about a murder series that Chief Steve Rogers tries to solve._

* * *

Natasha had to admit it to herself- she got lost and had no idea where she currently was. She'd followed the instructions of her GPS, but this was definitely not the little town called Valkyrie. Nope, this was just trees. Tons and tons of fucking trees and no town in sight. She groaned and punched her steering wheel. Ow, that was a dumb idea.

She got a map out of the glove box, since the GPS was no fucking help, and tried to figure out where she was. It took her some time, but she was positive that she figured out how to get to Valkyrie. Not that she even wanted to get there, but she had to. Getting the job at the New York Bulletin was another step to working for the New York Times one day, but Natasha hadn't imagined that her editor would send her upstate to cover a murder series that shocked the town. She wanted to write about political scandals and not satisfy the hunger of true crime fans. There was already so much crime in New York City, why did they have to report about a town 150 miles away? But Coulson thought that it was the perfect story for a series and Natasha was the (un-) lucky one to get it.

Three women had been killed in their own homes in the span of seven weeks and police seemed to have no clue who could have done it. There was no real evidence and the women were all different types. Natasha didn't know what to think about driving to a town where women were apparently not safe, but she had no choice. Being a reporter was a dangerous job, and she had her taser.

She sighed and started the engine to get to Valkyrie, hoping that the people would even talk to her. Weren't small town folks a bit weird? What would they think about a stranger coming to their town to report about the murders. The killer was probably one of their own, would they protect him?

Valkyrie looked like a town straight out of a movie. The streets were clean, flowers were planted alongside the sidewalks, and there were pretty cafes and boutiques everywhere. Thankfully her GPS seemed to work again and she found the B&B she was going to stay at without any problems.

She left her stuff in her car and walked inside the B&B to check in. Maybe someone here could fill her in on the gossip.

An older woman with a blonde chignon smiled at her warmly. "Hello, my dear. Checking in?"

"Yes." Natasha nodded, getting her credit card out of her wallet and handing it over. "It's under Romanoff."

The woman took the card and typed on her keyboard. "Ah, there you are. I'm Sarah. Sarah Rogers, the owner. Welcome to Valkyrie. Your first time here?"

"Yes, it is. I'm actually here for work." She said carefully, trying to find out if the other woman was going to talk.

"Oh, really?" She smiled. "We don't get so many visitors anymore because of...well, I'm sure you've heard."

"That's actually why I'm here. I'm a reporter. I work for the New York Bulletin."

"Such a fancy newspaper cares about our little town?" Miss Rogers looked genuinely surprised. "It's so terrible what happened to those women! But you're safe here. I had my son install an alarm system."

That actually made Natasha feel a little bit better. But she was still going to sleep with her taser underneath her pillow. "Did you know the victims?" She asked, relieved that the woman was talking about the murders with her.

"Yes, two of them. It's a small town. Wanda has worked here when she had been in high school and Melinda came here for breakfast from time to time. They were good people, they didn't deserve what happened to them!"

"I'm sorry."

Miss Rogers blinked her tears away. "Here are your keys." She handed them to her and waved at someone behind her. "And Peter will help you with your luggage. Breakfast is from 6 to 9, lunch from 12 to 2, and dinner from 6 til 8. Everything made by our wonderful cook May and me." She smiled at Natasha. "I hope you have a pleasant stay despite everything, and maybe your work will help solve the case." Miss Rogers grabbed her hand gently. "Please be careful, Miss Romanoff."

"I will." She whispered, suddenly feeling uneasy. How scared did the women in this town have to be? She hoped that they would find the bastard soon.

She googled the address of the police station after tipping Peter for carrying her suitcases, wanting to talk to the chief of police to find out how the investigation was going. The chief was probably an old white man who should have retired years ago and refused to accept that the killer was most likely one of their own.

She grabbed a notebook and pen after she checked that the windows of her room were closed. She double checked if she locked the door before she walked down the stairs. Sarah, as she had insisted to call her, gave her a muffin on the go after she'd heard that she hadn't had lunch yet. She couldn't help but be touched by the small gesture.

The police station was almost empty and the receptionist Darcy explained to her that it was because the chief had ordered that patrol cars were regularly driving through town to make the people feel safer. Natasha was surprised that the woman told her that. So far the people were way more open that she'd imagined. The chief wasn't present, but would be back soon and she was welcomed to wait here. She was even offered a coffee and a doughnut. Did Natasha have the wrong idea of a small town? She said no to the pastry, but yes to a cup of coffee.

She was almost done with her coffee when a man came into the station and Natasha almost choked on her beverage. _Holy shit_ , those kind of specimen lived in small towns? He was tall and the uniform barely fit him because of all those muscles. And he had a really pretty face that was framed by a neatly trimmed beard. Natasha shook her head slightly. She was here to work and not to lust after some officer. The handsome man spotted her and nodded at her with a smile.

"Boss man, a reporter is here to talk to you." Darcy yelled. Natasha's eyes widened. Hercules was the chief of police?!

He turned around to look at her again. "Natasha Romanoff, right?" How did he know her name? Had Coulson called to announce her arrival? "My mom told me that a reporter was staying at her place. That's you, isn't it?" He smiled at her and came over.

"Sarah is your mom?" She asked perplexed. Wow, this was really a small town.

He nodded. "Do you wanna talk in my office?"

"Uh, yes. That be great." She hoped that he would talk as open as his mother about the case. "What was your name again?"

"Oh." His cheeks turned pink. "I forgot to tell you. I'm Steve Rogers, ma'am." He offered her his hand and she shook it. Wow, his hand were really big. Was everything...Okay, get your head out of the gutter, Natasha.

She followed Chief Rogers into his office. She spotted a photo of him and his mother, and another one of him with a dark haired man. Was it his boyfriend? Brother? Friend? He wasn't wearing a wedding ring. When had she started to pay attention to those things? She observed him while he sat down at his desk. He seemed to be in his mid thirties. Wasn't that a bit young to be the chief of police?

"I'm surprised that a New Yorker newspaper cares about our little town."

"Well, you know that everyone is obsessed with true crime and people sleep better when it doesn't happen in their own neighborhood. Makes them feel safe." She shrugged her shoulders. "And media coverage has helped solve a lot of cases, so maybe we can help each other."

"Isn't New York one of the most dangerous cities in the world?" He had a small smirk on his face. "The newspapers in the area have reported about it, but most folks want to pretend like it didn't happen. Even though the women are terrified and don't feel safe in their own homes."

"Your mom talked to me about it."

He chuckled. "My mom doesn't let others tell her what to do. I can guarantee you though that most won't talk to you about the murders."

"Do you have a suspect yet?"

"No." He shook his head. "I'm not naive. I know that it's most likely one of our own. Most hope that it's a trucker or someone else who just passed by."

"That's rather unlikely, isn't it?" She was glad that Chief Rogers was on the same page as her.

"Yeah, but they don't want to accept that. We've never had a murder here before, let alone three, and no one wants to believe that a citizen of Valkyrie is capable of something like thia."

"Has anyone moved to the town recently? Or are there any connections between the women?"

Rogers shook his head. "No, not really. No one's new and there's nothing that caught our eye. They shopped at the same stores and all went to the gym here, but so does everyone else. It's a small town."

"Would you be okay with it if I go and ask around a little bit?"

"If you find anyone who's willing to talk to you, sure. But don't get your hopes up." He leaned back against his chair. "It's almost like they don't want the case to be solved. If no one talks about it, it didn't happen."

She thanked him for his time and left her card, asking him to call her if he had anything for her.

Rogers had been right. No one really wanted to talk about the murders, they just said that it had to be someone who passed through and that all three women had been good people. Natasha wanted to talk to the families of the victims, but she decided to do that tomorrow. She wasn't in the right head space to talk to them.

She decided to get a drink before she would drive back to the B&B. She found a bar, she was pretty sure that it was the only one in town, and ordered a vodka on the rocks. She stayed at the bar and observed the other guests. No other woman was alone here aside from Natasha herself and the bartender. There were mostly men here and three women who were in male company.

She thanked the bartender for the drink and went through her notes. So far she didn't have much. There was no suspect, they didn't even had a motive. Natasha was sure that the killer hated women. The killer had strangled the victims which was quite intimate. Usually murder victims knew their killer, so maybe all three women had a connection to the killer. But then again this was a town where everyone knew each other.

"Well, hello. I've never seen you here before." Natasha looked up from her notes and a dark haired man was sitting down next to her. "What's pretty face like you doing in a place like this?"

She had to fight really hard against the urge to roll her eyes. This place was actually quite nice and his line as old as humanity itself. She decided to ignore him, but he kept talking to her.

"I know everyone in town and you're new. I'm a police officer." He said and that made Natasha look at him, causing him to grin smugly. "I'm Brock. And you are?"

"Natasha." She simply said. "Are you working on the serial killer case?"

"You a true crime fan?" His gaze darted over her body and he was not very subtly looking at her breasts.

"Kind of. I'm a reporter."

"Oh, wow! Aren't you too pretty for that?" He grinned. The guy probably even thought that it was good compliment. "Yes, I'm working on the case, darling."

She ignored the pet name. "Can you tell me anything? I talked to the chief of police and-"

"Rogers?" He huffed out a laugh. "Please, the guy is useless. Just because he was in Quantico, doesn't mean he knows shit. He thinks it was one of our people." Brock rolled his eyes. "Then why hasn't it started sooner , huh?"

Rogers had been recruited by the FBI? "Some serial killers live a normal life for decades before their first kill."

"Don't worry your pretty head with his stupid theories. You know, I was supposed to be chief of police, but then Fury makes Rogers his successor. I tell you that it was a trucker. The highway is near by and isn't it smart to kill people in a place where you don't live?"

She just shrugged her shoulders. She didn't want to talk to him anymore. He seemed to be pretty set on the theory that it was a stranger, but Natasha thought it was just lazy. She threw money on the bar, nodding a thanks at the bartender. "I have to get going. It was nice talking to you, Brock."

"The night doesn't have to be over yet, Natasha." His hand landed on her thigh. "I can show you around town. I can show you my apartment."

Woah, did the guy really think that she wanted to sleep with him after a five minute conversation about murders? "No, thanks." She shook his hand off and stood up.

"Aw, don't be like that, darling!"

She ignored him and left the bar. God, some men were just...Ugh.

She walked to her car and drove back to the B&B, thinking about the case. Maybe the killer was someone who got rejected by the victims? Wanda Maximoff had been 21, Melinda May 43, and Claire Temple 36. They all could have been approached by the same guy or maybe it was someone who had easy access to their apartments. Like a plumber or handyman.

Natasha couldn't help but feel like someone was watching her on her way from the car to the house. She looked more than once over her shoulder, but couldn't see anyone. Her mind was probably playing tricks on her. She opened the door and almost ran into Chief Rogers. Who was not in his uniform, but in jeans and t shirt. God, he had such a nice body.

"Hi!"

"Hi!"

They both laughed and he stepped aside to let her in. "Thanks. What are you doing here?"

"I had dinner with my mom." He smiled at her. "I come here at least three times a week. I know, I'm a mama's boy."

She smiled back. Still having parents had to be nice. "I met your colleague today. Brick. No, Brock."

Rogers looked annoyed. "I take it that he told you that I have no clue?"

"Yeah, something like that."

He rolled his eyes. "He's really stuck on the idea that it was someone not from here. And he thinks that he knows everything better."

She was about to tell him that Brock had hit on her, but changed her mind. He probably didn't care what his men did in their free time and she'd handled him.

"Goodnight."

"Yeah, goodnight." He was about to leave, but then turned around. "Don't open your window. There's an AC."

She nodded. "Okay, I won't."

"Good. I guess I see you around, Miss Romanoff." He said with a small smile.

"Bye, Chief Rogers."

* * *

Talking to the victim's families didn't really bring Natasha any further. One of them had been in a relationship (the boyfriend had been out of the country during two of the murders), and the other two had been single and no one knew anything about a potential suitor. They hadn't acted differently the weeks before they had been killed and the families just couldn't understand how anyone could do something so horrible. And none of the victims have had reparations at their homes before the killings.

Natasha had nothing. She told her boss that but he told her to keep digging and to write an article about the victims and the town. People were loving that stuff according to him. She went back to the B&B for an afternoon nap because the conversations with the families had drained her. It was so frustrating to talk to them without offering them anything in return. She couldn't tell them who had killed their daughter or sister.

A knock on her door woke her up an hour later and Natasha got up to answer the door. She opened it, but left the chain on. Better be safe than sorry, but then again, she doubted that a killer would knock first. She opened the door completely when she saw that it was just Sarah.

"Hello, my dear. I made some cookies for you." Sarah smiled warmly at her and Natasha's chest felt tight. The older woman reminded her so much of her own mother.

"Thank you so much." She let Sarah in who put the cookie plate on the desk by the window.

"How is it going?"

"Not good. How has your son not lost his mind already?"

Sarah chuckled sadly. "He's stubborn. He will keep the case open until he found the killer. And he will. My Steve is a smart boy. I assume your mother is not happy that you're in a town where a serial killer is lose?"

"My parents passed away when I was in college."

"Oh, Natasha. I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to-"

"I know, it's okay. You didn't know. I have an older brother who gave me a taser when I moved out." She laughed a little, thinking about the over protectiveness of Clint. Maybe he should have gotten one for himself, since she had always been the better one in Krav Maga. "I can protect myself."

Sarah nodded. "Yeah, but it's still a dangerous world for a woman. I made sure that I raised my Steve to be respectful to women and to protect them."

"He seems like a good guy." She assured Sarah.

"So, do you have a boyfriend waiting for you in the big city? Or a girlfriend?" Sarah asked with a mischief glint in her eyes.

Natasha had to laugh. "No. No boyfriend or girlfriend."

"You know...Steve is single as well." Sarah grinned and Natasha didn't know what to say. "I know that my boy is a good and handsome man, but he just hasn't found a woman who is his match."

"Well, I'm sure that he will find her one day. Uh, I have to start writing my article for my boss..." She was suddenly feeling a little bit uncomfortable.

"Of course." Sarah smiled and walked to the door. "I think Steve will come over for dinner tomorrow, why don't you join us? My house is at the end of the property."

"I...I see how far I got with my article until then."

"Excellent."

Oh God, was Sarah trying to set her up with her son? She barely knew her and Natasha was going to leave right after the killer was caught or Coulson ordered her to come back to the city earlier, so what was the point?

* * *

Natasha spent most of the next day in her room, writing and editing her article. She wasn't really happy with it since it was just a repeat of everything they already knew, but she hit send anyway.

She wasn't sure if she should really go to Sarah's house, but Natasha was hungry and maybe Rogers would tell her more about the case. She decided against wearing a dress (she'd only packed one anyway) and showed up in jeans and a blouse.

Rogers was already there because he answered the door when she opened it. "Hey! My ma hoped that you would come!"

"Yeah, well, it would have been rude not to."

Sarah greeted her with a warm hug and ushered her and her son to the dining table. The food was amazing and Sarah and Steve ( they ended up on a first name basis much to Sarah's joy) told her about the town. And Sarah told her very proudly that Steve had been in the FBI until he'd decided to come home to become the new chief of police. She told them in return about her brother and his family and that she'd always wanted to be a journalist.

She offered to do the dishes after dinner, but Sarah ordered her and Steve to take their wine glasses and sit outside.

"You never mentioned that you were in the FBI."

"You never asked." He grinned while fluffing out the pillows so they could sit down.

"Touché." She laughed and sat down. "And you just decided that you don't want to be a fed anymore and came home?"

"Yeah, kinda. I love it here, it's a great place, current events aside. I liked the FBI, but this is home, you know. My mom always worried that something could happen to me and it's relatively safe here."

"I get that. It seems very idyllic here. It's very quiet. I almost couldn't sleep at first because I didn't hear the sounds of the city."

"I actually lived in Brooklyn for a while. My best friend still lives there. He left this town as soon as possible." Steve laughed. "This town is not for everyone."

They talked a little bit about things they liked and Natasha didn't even notice that she forgot to ask him about the case. "Your mother mentioned that you're single?"

Steve groaned. "She told you that?"

"Yep." A giggle escaped her and she bit her lip.

"Oh man, that's _why_ I just had to come over tonight. I am so sorry!" His face was completely red.

"It's okay, don't worry. Your mom cares about you, it's sweet."

"If you say so." He rubbed the back of his neck. "Uh...are you single?"

"Yeah." She said with a laugh. "Haven't found the right person yet."

"...yeah..." He nodded and emptied his wine glass. He seemed lost in thought and she focused on the starry sky above them.

"I can't remember the last time I could see so many stars." She whispered in awe. It was truly beautiful.

"One of the perks of living here." He laughed softly, pointing out different constellations to her. She had to admit that she loved listening to his voice. It was so deep and smooth. They ended up with their shoulders and arms touching and Steve pulled a blanket over them because it started to get chilly. She closed her eyes and listened to a story from his childhood. They were so close to each other that she could smell his cologne and she fought the urge to snuggle up against him. Maybe he would walk her back to her room later, maybe he would try to kiss her. She would let him.

The sound of twigs breaking and a whispered _shit_ startled her out of her sleepy state. Steve was up in a second, drawing his gun. She hadn't even noticed that he was armed.

"Get back inside." He whispered to her. "Lock the door behind you. My mom has a rifle, tell her to get it."

She blinked at him before she pulled herself together and got back into the house. God, was the killer outside? Would Steve be okay? Why hadn't she taken her taser with her?! She found Sarah in the kitchen whose smile vanished when Natasha told her what had happened. Sarah went to get her rifle and told Natasha to get behind her. Was the serial killer really out there? Was he really that dumb to spy on the chief of police?

Two sharp knocks on the door startled both her and Sarah, but they relaxed when they heard Steve's voice. Sarah let her son in and he informed them that whoever had been in the woods was gone.

"You think it was the killer?" She asked him, surprised that she had been so scared.

"Maybe. Could also be a couple of teens, having some fun." He smiled a little. "Whoever it was, is gone now. I'll walk you to your room, don't worry."

She thanked Sarah for the lovely dinner and Steve reminded his mother to lock up behind them. They walked in silence through the big garden back to the B&B.

"Look, I probably overreacted back there." He said when they were in front of her door. "It was probably just some teens. I'm sorry if I scared you."

"It's okay. Thank you for walking me back to my room." She smiled at him. "What a gentleman."

He blushed adorably. "My ma would have my head if I didn't."

"Goodnight Steve." She laughed, unlocking her door. She stepped over the threshold and something crunched underneath her boot. She looked down and saw that she stepped on a piece of paper.

"Did you drop this?" Steve asked, picking it up.

"No, I don't think so." She took the note from him and unfolded her. Her heart started racing when she read it.

"What's wrong?"

She handed him the piece of paper without a word. _Nosy bitches get more than stitches. Go back to the city, you cunt._

Steve's expression changed to worry and his jaw was set. "Do you have a plastic bag?"

"Yeah, I think so." She was glad that searching for the bag kind of distracted her from the fact that someone, probably the killer, was threatening her. She found a bag in her suitcase and handed it to Steve. He put the note in it and stuck it into his leather jacket.

"I'll send this in for fingerprints and DNA, but I doubt that there is anything on it." He laid his hand on her shoulder. "I have a guestroom...You can stay there if you want... I rather keep an eye on you. We shouldn't take this lightly."

"I...I have a taser." She managed to get out.

"My mother told me." He chuckled. "I don't mean to undermine you or patronize you, but someone just threatened your life and we don't know who."

"Okay, yeah, you're right."

She packed her stuff while Steve called his mother to update her. They stopped on their way at the police station and Steve sealed the evidence so it could be send to the crime lab first thing in the morning.

Steve showed her where everything was when they got to his apartment, and told her to call for him if she needed anything. She took a hot shower before she went to bed. Natasha barely slept that night, unable to stop thinking about the note. Was the killer now after her?

* * *

 _To be continued..._


	95. Murder Mystery II (AU)

_Part II_

* * *

A knock on the door woke Natasha up the next morning. The room was still dark, so she figured that it was early in the morning.

"Can I come in?" Steve asked through the closed door.

She sat up against the headboard and made sure that her hair wasn't too much of a mess after she'd spent most of the night tossing and turning in bed, failing at not thinking about the note.

"Yes, of course."

The door opened and Steve came in with a cup of coffee. He was already in his uniform. "Morning. I hope you like your coffee with milk and sugar?"

"Yes, perfect." She smiled and accepted the mug. "Thank you. And thank you so much for letting me stay the night."

"Of course. I hope you got some sleep?" He sat down at the edge of the bed, leaving enough space between them so she wouldn't feel uncomfortable. He was such a thoughtful man.

"A little bit." She took a sip from the coffee and hummed a little. That was exactly what she needed. "So the person who left the note was probably also in the woods, right? It was the killer, wasn't it?"

"I think so." Steve nodded, his expression grim. "He doesn't want you to figure out who he is. I'm sure your boss will understand if you want to drop the story."

"No! I'm staying here!" She wasn't going to give up now. She was obviously asking the right questions or otherwise the killer wouldn't have threatened her. "A little mean note won't chase me away."

"You were pretty spooked last night." He said softly. "No one's going to fault you for wanting to leave."

"No, I'll help you catch the guy. Maybe this story will be my Pulitzer." She joked. Yes, she was still scared, but she knew that this was what the killer wanted. And she wasn't going to let him win. She would carry her taser on her at all times and she felt really safe with Steve. No, that was a dangerous thought. She couldn't start to like him. "Can you drive me back to the B&B? Or do you have to go to work right now?"

"Did you forget something in your room? My mom can bring it over."

"I can't stay here, Steve." She said softly, even though she wanted to. Not just because he could protect her. She could do that on her own, no, she wanted to stay here because she liked to be in his company. Last night out on the patio had been so perfect until they'd heard that noise.

"Of course you can, Natasha." He reached his hand over and placed it on hers. Oh, that felt nice. "We have to take this threat seriously. You're safe here. And I'm pretty sure that my mom is going to stop talking to both of us if I don't look after you."

"Okay." She chuckled and he smiled. "I don't to want upset Sarah."

"Good. I left you a set of keys on the kitchen table so you can come and go as you want. But please be here when it gets dark, okay?" He looked so concerned that she only nodded. "I'll try to come home tonight as soon as possible. The downstairs neighbor is a very good friend of mine. Sam is a good guy and you can trust him. If you notice anything unusual and I'm not home, go to him. He's a vet, he knows what to do. And please always have your taser on you."

"Okay." She nodded, trying her best not to freak out. "I will."

"I'm probably overreacting, but I don't want anything happen to you."

Steve had to leave for work and Natasha got ready for the day. She saw that Coulson had emailed her, telling her that he liked the article. She decided against informing him about what had happened last night. Sarah came by to drive her back to the B&B so Natasha could get her car. She seemed really worried about her and was relieved when Natasha told her that she was going to stay at Steve's after telling her that she wasn't going to leave town.

She decided to spend the day at the library to find out more about the town and its people. She went through the archives, hoping to find reports of domestic violence or anything similar, because the killer obviously hated women. She only found articles about DUIs and brawls, there had been a car accident with two deaths but that had happened almost 30 years ago. One article caught her eye, reporting about a woman calling the police last year, because she was sure that someone was lurking in her backyard during the night. It also said that she'd heard scratching on her door, but police found nothing. The article didn't name the woman, so Natasha would have to ask Steve about it tonight. Had this woman almost been the first victim?

She was surprised when it was already 4pm when she checked her phone. Wow, she had been here for over eight hours and only found one thing that might be something. She saw that Steve had texted her to tell her that he was going to be back around six. She could cook something as a thank you. She wasn't that great of a cook, but she would manage to make a pasta dish.

The grocery store wasn't far away (the perks of a small town) and she put spaghetti, cream, mushrooms and herbs into her shopping basket. She added white wine and a little chocolate cake and shower gel because she'd noticed this morning that Steve's was almost empty. She was looking for some magazines in case she wouldn't be able to sleep again tonight when she noticed that someone was standing behind her.

"Hey, writer!" It was the police officer. Brock, was his name, right? His smile was more of a smirk. "I'd heard that you left town? My sister said your room has been emptied out. She works there as a maid."

"No, I'm still here."

"Great!" He grinned at her, his eyes dropping every so often to her chest. Did men really think that women didn't notice it when a guy was looking at their boobs? "That means we can go out! Where are you staying? I can pick up later and we can drive through town."

She would rather stick a fork in her eye than spend an evening with that guy. She knew that he just wanted to fuck her. "I already got plans." She picked a magazine without looking and dumped it into the basket. "Have a nice evening, Brick."

"It's Brock!" He yelled after her while she walked to the checkout. "You don't know what you're missing out on, darling!"

She paid for her stuff and drove back to Steve's apartment. He wasn't there yet and she started to make dinner. It was nothing fancy, but she still hoped that he would like it. Steve came home when she was draining the pasta and adding it to the sauce.

"Oh wow, it smells great!" He said as a greeting and she smiled at him. "You didn't have to cook though."

"I know, but I wanted to. It's just pasta."

"Let me quickly wash up and then I'll set the table." He smiled and left the kitchen. He came back a few minutes later in a tee and sweatpants and set the table like he'd said he would.

She served the pasta in bowls while Steve filled their wine glasses. They sat down at the kitchen table and Natasha was happy when he said that he liked her dish. Steve told her that he sent the note to the crime lab, but it would take some time until they would get a result. They probably wouldn't find anything anyway, the killer hadn't left any DNA or fingerprints at any of the other crime scenes behind.

"I went through the news archive today and found an article about a woman thinking that someone was watching her?"

Steve nodded."Yeah, that was Maria Hill. She moved away a couple of months ago because of work. It happened before I came back. I read the report. There were no signs that someone tried to break in and no one else saw anything. Maria had been out of town a lot because of her job, it could have been burglars or teens who wanted to raid her cupboards for alcohol."

"Or it could have been the killer and he dropped his plan because of the attention." She stated, refilling her wine glass.

"Yeah, that thought crossed my mind as well." He nodded. "It could have been the killer. But he's smart. He probably educated himself before he started. He's like a ghost. He doesn't leave anything behind."

"Do you..." She wasn't so sure if she could ask the chief of police the question that was on her mind.

"Yeah?"

"Do you think it could be someone with... a law enforcement background?" She asked quietly.

He took a deep breath. "I can't rule it out. But crime shows and the internet educated the public on how investigations works. It could be anyone. It's probably a white man between 20 and 50, but that profile matches 33% of the population in this town."

"So we have nothing?"

He stood up with his plate in his hands. "Yeah. I wish I could tell you that I'm close to solving it, but I'm not. And people start to mistrust each other and that's not helping. And they start to resent me because I think it's one of us."

Natasha was done with talking about the case for the day. She didn't want to think about the fact that she could potentially be the next victim. "Do you want to watch a movie?"

"Sure." He smiled and took her plate. "What are you in the mood for?"

"Disney?"

They decided to watch their favorite Disney movies. Hers was The Lion King and Steve loved Robin Hood. They sang along and both sniffed when Mufasa died. They were watching Robin Hood when her eye lids grew heavier and heavier.

She woke up when someone was lifting her up. _Steve_ was lifting her up and carrying her to the guestroom. "Oh shit. Did I wake you, I'm sorry!"

"It's okay. Sorry that I fell asleep." She yawned, quickly covering her mouth with her hand. "You can let me down. I can walk the rest on my own."

"Right, sorry." He let her down and wished her a goodnight.

"Night, Steve." She leaned forward without thinking and kissed his cheek. "Sorry!"

"It's okay!" He said quickly, his cheeks turning pink. "Goodnight."

"Yeah." She nodded and disappeared into the bathroom to brush her teeth, ignoring the urge to run back and grab his face to kiss him until they were both out of breath. What the fuck was wrong with her? There was a serial killer out there and she was thinking about sleeping with the chief of police. It shocked her how much she wanted to go to his room, but she pulled herself together and went to the guestroom. She couldn't start anything with him. Her life was in New York and his was here in Valkyrie and he didn't strike her as the type to have a little affair. And sleeping with the main source of intel was just fucking unprofessional.

* * *

Sarah had invited her over for breakfast and Natasha stayed the whole morning at the B&B. Steve's mother told her more about the victims, but she couldn't tell her if there had been any rumors of domestic violence or sexual harassment.

"I'm sorry, dear. I know that it happens behind closed doors in every community, but no one never talks about it." Sarah took a deep breath. "I've never told anyone."

Natasha looked up from the menu card she was currently laminating for Sarah. "Were you-?"

"There's a reason why Steve's father is never mentioned. He was a drunk and he took his frustration out on me. No one knew. It took me some time, but one day I finally found the strength and kicked him out. He died a few years ago, but we didn't go to the funeral. I'm just glad that Steve doesn't take after his father." Sarah smiled softly. "God gave me a good boy."

Natasha nodded in agreement. "He's great."

"Is he your type?" Sarah asked hopefully.

"Um..." Natasha didn't blush easily, but her face felt pretty warm right now. Sarah was still looking at her with hope in her eyes. She didn't want to offend her so she just started to babble. "He's very handsome...and sweet."

"And he has a heart out of gold. He would always treat you right, Natasha." Sarah placed her hand on top of Natasha's. "Just think about it. My son likes you and you like him, too."

"I..." She didn't know what to say. She couldn't tell Steve's mother that she'd had a pretty vivid sex dream about her son last night. She couldn't tell her that she thought that his eyes were the kindest she had ever seen. She couldn't tell her that sweet men like Steve never went for her, that men like Brock wanted her to hit it and quit it. "He's gonna find someone, don't worry, Sarah."

"Yeah. Don't deny herself from something that you deserve, okay honey?" Sarah let go off her hand and stood up. "I should see what May is doing in the kitchen. Thank you for your help with the new menus."

"O-okay, yes. I should get going."

Natasha thanked her for the breakfast and went to her car. She drove aimlessly through town and ended up in front of the police station. Great! Her subconscious had led her to the object of her desire. Maybe Steve had a new lead that he would share with her. She walked into the police station and asked the two police officers that were there if the Chief was here. She was told that he was in his office and Natasha knocked on his door.

Steve smiled at her brightly and Natasha felt all warm and fuzzy. She ignored it and walked into his office. "Hi."

"Hey. What brings you to my humble chambers?"

"I was hoping that you have anything new for me?"

"No." He sighed in defeat. "A trucker had breakfast this morning at the diner and we got several phone calls, informing us that the killer was back. I sent someone to check on him and the poor guy is in the area for the first time."

"Jesus." She grimaced, feeling bad for every foreign man that came into the town. It would make so much more sense for a trucker killer to kill in different towns and not come back to the same town for each murder.

"So...uh...listen...I have to go to the neighbor town Sokovia for a meeting this afternoon...Do you want to come with? The meeting won't take long and Sokovia is a beautiful town. You can explore it and then we can grab a bite together after my meeting?" He was nervous and Natasha wondered if she just got asked on a date.

"Yes." She said before she even realized what was happening.

His whole face lit up. "Great! I have to finish this report and then I'll meet you at my place? I have to change before we can go."

She nodded and left the police station to drive to Steve's apartment. A police car passed by her on her way with Brock and another officer in it. He smirked at her and Natasha nodded politely. She took a shower when she was back at Steve's place, spent ten minutes to pick out the right outfit, and made sure that her red hair looked extra shiny and that her natural curls were extra bouncy. She remembered how her mother had told her to apply perfume where she wanted to be kissed by a man and and spread it on her neck and, just to be safe, between her breasts. You never knew what could happen.

Steve arrived a few minutes later and she could see in his eyes that he liked what he saw. He disappeared into his bedroom and came out in black jeans, a button down and blazer. He looked so good that Natasha licked her lips before she could stop herself.

"Ready?" He asked with a warm smile on his lips.

"Yeah, let's go."

* * *

The drive to Sokovia was only 30 minutes long and she told Steve about the trips she'd done with her family when she had been a child. His mother hadn't been able to leave the B&B closed for too long, so he'd gone with his best friend's family on vacation. Natasha liked they had could talk so open with each other.

He promised her that the meeting with Chief Danvers wouldn't take too long and he would call her when he was done. She told him that she would be okay without him and decided to check out the boutiques and little shops here. Sokovia was a bigger town than Valkyrie and Natasha wanted to see if she could find anything nice for Steve as a thank you for everything he'd done for her.

She had noticed a sketchbook on his coffee table and she had been dying to peak inside but she hadn't, and with that in mind she bought him watercolor pencils that she hoped he could use. She remembered that her eyeliner was almost empty when she spotted a Walgreens. She got a new eyeliner, mints and grabbed a box of condoms without really thinking about it. The older lady at the checkout was grinning at her and Natasha quickly hid the box in her bag so Steve wouldn't see it. She didn't know if he had any and if anything was going to happen between them they needed protection.

She was in a bookstore when Steve called her to tell her that he was done and asked if she was hungry. They met a in front of cute, little cafe and sat down outside on the patio with a great view of the river. His warm smile made her heart flutter and she knew in that moment she was a goner. She wanted him. And even worse, she _liked_ him.

"How did your meeting go?" She asked him after they ordered.

"Good. Danvers and I agree that the police departments have to work closer together. We hope to get the other chiefs on board so that we have more information and hopefully solve cases sooner."

"You hope to catch the killer that way?"

"Maybe he committed a crime in another county and we don't know about it yet. Not a murder, but maybe assault."

Their coffee and cake arrived and Natasha decided that she didn't want to talk about work for the rest of the day. No, she wanted to find out more about Steve Rogers. She wanted to know everything about him.

She asked him why he'd wanted to be an FBI agent and he told her that he just wanted to help people. He'd joined the army after high school and had been recruited by the FBI after he'd left. And she could see how much it bothered him that he hadn't caught the killer yet. And she decided in that moment that she would stay as long in Valkyrie as necessary until they got the bastard. He wanted to know what made her want to be a journalist and he looked at her so fondly when she told him that she always loved writing and had "published" her own newspaper as a kid that she couldn't stop the blush heating up her face.

"I dictated my articles to my brother when I couldn't write yet." She laughed, remembering how annoyed Clint had been, but he'd still done it. "Journalism can reach million of peoples, it can open their minds, it can change the world. I always wanted to be part of that."

"I read your articles."

"What? You did?"

"Yeah..." He blushed adorably. "I googled you after you came by the station for the first time. I wanted to know what kind of person you are. Your pieces are great. I loved the one you wrote about that corrupt politician. What was his name again?"

"Alexander Pierce."

"Yeah, him. You really reminded your readers that politicians are supposed to serve the people and not themselves. It was a great read."

"Thank you." Now she was blushing, too. But she highly doubted that she looked as adorably as Steve.

Natasha didn't even notice that they already finished their coffee and cake until the waitress came to clean the table. Steve insisted to pay, again making her think that it was a date.

"Do you want to go rowing?" He asked and she looked over to the river, it wasn't a big one, but it still looked like it had strong flux. "No, not the river. There's a lake outside of town and they rent row boats."

"Oh, yes. That sounds lovely!"

And quite romantic, but she kept that to herself. Steve said that it wasn't far away and they walked to the lake. They talked more about things they liked and Steve seemed really impressed when she told him that she was a former ballerina. They managed to get the last row boat and Steve, the gentleman, helped her get into it. He took the oars and started to row. The area was really pretty, but Natasha just focused on Steve. She would have never thought that the tall and muscular man was actually incredible sweet and kind. He was really one of a kind.

"What?" Steve asked her with a smile on his face.

She grinned back. "Nothing.

"Okay." He laughed, shaking his head in amusement. Her grin grew bigger because she decided that she was going to kiss him today.

He helped her out of the boot when their time was up and she used that chance to press her body against his. She heard his breath hitch which was definitely a confidence boost. They walked back to his car in comfortable silence, both sneaking glances at each other the whole time.

"I'm really glad that you took me with you." She told him when they were in the car.

He smiled kindly at her. "I'm glad you came with."

"Is there anything else we can do? I don't wanna go back yet."

"Hm." He was trying to think about something. "Well, there's a maze near by. You wanna go?"

"Yes!" She nodded eagerly, because she didn't want this perfect day to end. When had she felt this comfortable in the presence of a man? She couldn't remember.

"Okay!" He grinned happily and started the car.

Natasha had really underestimated small towns. The maze was ginormous and would lead them to a big field that was perfect for picnics. She got her wallet out before Steve could get his and bought a picnic basket for them. He took the basket from her and followed her into the maze. She grinned over her shoulder and the way he was looking at her told her that he considered today to be a date as well.

They got lost more than once and Natasha decided to try something when they ended up in an impasse. No one was around and she took the picnic basket from Steve and put it on the ground.

"I don't think that's a good place for a picnic." He laughed, but he stopped when she stepped into his personal space.

"I've been thinking all day long only about one thing." She whispered, her hands gliding up his arms to his neck.

"Yeah?" He breathed, his gaze dropping to her lips. "What have you been thinking about?"

"This." She rose onto her tiptoes ( he was so much taller than her) and brushed her lips against his. "Okay?"

His answer was to press her against him and to slant their lips together in kiss. She smiled, wrapping her arms around his neck, and she gasped into the kiss when he lifted her up to even out the height difference. God, it was such a great kiss. It was that kind of kiss that made the butterflies in your stomach go crazy and your toes curl.

"Wow." He whispered when they pulled away to get air into their lungs.

"Yeah, wow." She echoed, unable to stop herself from kissing him again.

It probably took them a considerate amount of time longer than usual to get out of the maze, but they had to stop several times for kisses. But they did get to the field eventually and had a wonderful picnic with even more kissing.

"I can't stop thinking about you since we talked in my office for the first time." He confessed between kisses.

She smiled up at him. "That makes two of you."

It was already dark when they were back in Valkyrie. Steve wanted to check in on his mother before they would drive to his apartment and Natasha had the feeling that Sarah knew that something had changed between her and her son. Sarah wished them goodnight with a cheeky grin and she immediately thought about the condoms in her purse.

Natasha didn't sleep that night in the guestroom.

* * *

The loud beeping of an alarm woke her up the following morning. An arm reached over her to shut it off and the events of last nights flashed through her mind, causing her to grin like a fool.

"Go back to sleep." Steve whispered and kissed the back of her head before he tried to untangle himself from her, but she wouldn't let him.

"Nooo, stay." She whined, cuddling closer to him. He was so warm and he smelled so good. She turned around to bury her face in his chest.

"I have to get to work, Nat." He chuckled, kissing her hair.

She sighed, knowing that he was right. God, being a responsible adult sucked. She'd rather stay in bed here with him all day, getting lost in each other. Like they had done last night. But she had work to do. Wanda Maximoff's brother had texted her yesterday, telling her that he wanted to give her his sister's journal, hoping that it would help somehow.

Natasha moved until she was hovering with her face over Steve's, leaning down to kiss him. "Morning, handsome."

He smiled into the kiss, his hands roaming over her naked back. "Good morning."

"What are your thoughts on a shared shower?" She tugged on his lower lip with her teeth. "To save water, you know?"

They left his apartment an hour later, both showered and definitely sporting a healthy glow on their faces, and Steve walked her to her car. "Do you wanna come by the station later so we can have lunch together?"

She nodded. "Yes, I'd love to."

He smiled and pecked her lips. "Great. Do you have your taser with you?"

"Yep." She patted her purse. "I'll see you later."

The butterflies in her stomach went crazy when he cupped her face to kiss her softly. "Be careful."

"You, too."

She sat down on a bench near the police station after Pietro Maximoff had giving her his sister's journal. He hadn't been able to look inside since he'd found it yesterday morning and he'd lost his faith in the police, so he decided to give it to Natasha. She could understand Pietro's frustration, but Steve was really trying his best to find the murderer.

Natasha didn't know what to think about reading the most intimate thoughts of a dead young woman, it felt like a intrusion of privacy. She just hoped that she would find something in here.

Wanda seemed like a sweet person. She had worked in a pharmacy in Sokovia, specializing on natural remedies, and dreamed about opening her own store one day. She'd loved her brother a lot and had looked online for a cat to adopt. So far Natasha couldn't find anything unusual in Wanda's diary, she had just been a 21 year old woman who had still her whole life ahead of her. She started to get angry, Wanda had cared for others so much, she hadn't deserved such a cruel fate. She had never even been in love and now she would never experience that.

She decided to take a break to clear her mind and went to the only diner in town to get lunch for her and Steve. She remembered that his assistant Darcy loved doughnuts and got her one with pink and white sprinkles.

Darcy greeted her with a smile when Natasha walked into the police station. "Hello, Miss Reporter."

"Hey, Darcy!" Natasha laughed, handing her the doughnut. "Here for you."

"Oh, thanks!" She beamed, licking her lips. "I was gonna be a real grown up and have salad for lunch, but I'm rather having this."

"Well, hello there." Natasha didn't need to turn around to know who just walked into the station. "How are you, Red?"

She shared a look with Darcy before she addressed Brock. "Good. I'm here to talk to Chief Rogers."

He pointed at the food bag in her hand. "Trying to bribe him with food? He's clueless, I told you so! He's not gonna find the killer even if he's holding up a poster with 'I'm the killer ' in red letters."

It was probably pointless to point out to him that he hadn't caught the killer either. "Have a nice day, Brock."

"You wanna go out tonight? Get dinner and then to my place? I have a waterbed. For the extra bounce." He winked at her and Natasha heard Darcy snort behind her.

"I'm not going out with you tonight. Not now, not ever." Natasha said sternly. "It's not gonna happen, so stop asking!"

"Yeah, Rumlow!" Darcy chimed in. "You're not getting your dick wet tonight, so forget it! No woman with a little self esteem wants you!"

His jaw was clenched and he looked at her and Darcy with disgust. "Fu-"

"Natasha!" Steve interrupted Brock in that moment, coming out of his office. "Hey, I didn't know you were here yet!"

She smiled at him, barely noticing that Brock slammed the door on his way out. "Hey! I brought food."

She followed Steve into his office, not missing how Darcy gave her a thumps up before she bit into her doughnut. They had lunch and Steve asked her on another date. He wanted to take her stargazing, apparently there would be a meteor shower tonight and they could have a picnic underneath the stars. She immediately said yes and kissed him on the lips as a goodbye before she left.

She didn't really get to read more of Wanda's diary, because she had to participate in a conference call with the editorial staff and then her niece facetimed her to talk to her about her role in the new school play. She drove to Steve's apartment and got ready for her date. He got home shortly after her and after a quick shower he drove her to a hill from from where they could see the meteor shower perfectly.

They barely kept their hands off each other on their way from his car to his apartment and Natasha was glad that it was pitch black so no one could see them or otherwise they would be the talk of the town tomorrow.

They landed on his bed with Steve on top of her, all urgency suddenly gone. He brushed a strain of her hair behind her ear and smiled down at her. "I know that the circumstances aren't ideal, but I'm so happy that you came into my life."

She cupped his cheek with her hand, emotions she hadn't felt in forever coming to the surface. "I really like you."

"I like you, too." He whispered against her lips before he kissed her deeply.

* * *

Natasha stayed the next day in Steve's apartment to finish Wanda's diary. She didn't know why but she completely forgot to tell Steve about it. She discovered to her utter surprise that there had been a man in Wanda's life. No mentions of his name, only that he was handsome and older than her and that had been the reason why they'd kept it a secret.

 _He is so much different than I always thought he was. He's patient with me, he always calls me to check in on me and he's willing to wait to take the next step. I always assumed that he only wanted sex from women, that he was a brute, but he's kind to me. I know that the age difference could be a obstacle, but I like him._

Natasha felt bittersweet when she read those lines. It looked like Wanda had found someone and then everything had been snatched away from her. She found another entry about the mysterious guy from two weeks before her death.

 _It wasn't how I thought it would be. I pictured our first time to be gentle and sweet, I thought we would make love, but it wasn't like that. I felt uncomfortable, but he said that it was just because I was inexperienced. Everyone had that kind of sex. I liked it at first, but then...it was like something snapped in him. He held me down and when I told him to let go, he wrapped his hand around my throat and started squeezing it. He let go off me when he was done and was completely sweet again. I don't know what to do. Are all older men like that? Is that just how men get over the years? Are all adults having this kind of sex? Should I just get use to it?_

Natasha felt sick to her stomach. It sounded like Wanda had been sexually assaulted by the man that she'd liked. And he'd choked her...The killer had strangled all of his victims. Wanda was the first kill...Had Wanda _dated_ her killer? She went through the journal again, hoping that she would find any clue about the identity of the man.

She was about to call Steve to tell him about Wanda's secret boyfriend and her assault when her phone started ringing. It was Steve.

He started talking as soon as she answered the call. "Nat? Where are you?"

"At your place. Look-"

"Please come to the station right now! I need to know that you are safe!" He sounded frantic, desperate. Something was wrong.

"Steve, what happened?" Her heart started racing. What had happened?

"Darcy...She's dead." He choked out and Natasha felt like someone punched her in the gut. God, not Darcy! "We...we found her this morning in her apartment after she didn't come to work. He killed her!"

* * *

 _Third and finale part coming soon..._


	96. Murder Mystery III (AU)

_Warning: Rumlow says and does some pretty problematic things that could make some of you uncomfortable._

 _Part III_

* * *

Thousand thoughts were running through Natasha's head on her way to the police station. Why did it have to be _Darcy_? Bubbly, sweet Darcy? Natasha couldn't believe that she was dead. No, it had to be some kind of misunderstanding. Darcy had been so young and full of life! And why had the killer gone for Darcy and not Natasha? Was Natasha next? And how was Steve holding up? She couldn't even imagine what he was feeling right now.

She raced to the police station in record time and saw that the news about Darcy's death had already spread. Candles, flowers and stuffed bears were in front of the police station. Natasha wiped away a tear when she spotted a photo of a smiling Darcy. The other victims were strangers to her, even though she was getting to know Wanda through her diary, but Natasha knew Darcy and...she'd wanted to see her favorite band next week in New York. It just wasn't fair.

She pushed the doors of the police station open and took in a sharp breath when she saw the empty reception. A few officers were there and she found Steve sitting in a corner with his face in his hands. She quickly walked over to him, but he didn't seem to notice her presence.

"Steve?" She asked softly and he looked up at her and her heart broke for him. His eyes were bloodshot and he just looked...defeated. And so small.

He didn't say anything to her, he just wrapped his arms around her middle and buried his face in her belly. She ran her fingers through his hair, hoping that it was soothing. "I'm so sorry, Steve."

His hold on her tightened, but he moved his head to look up at her. "She's just...gone. I...Why her? She is... _was_ so sweet and caring. Everyone loved her...I just...How could someone look at her and decide to kill her?"

She had no answers for him. She couldn't understand it herself. She only knew that a monster had done those horrific things and she wanted him to burn in hell. Steve buried his face back into her hoodie (it was actually his that she had quickly thrown over after he'd called her) and she kept running her fingers through his blond hair.

"Boss?" They both looked up and a female officer came towards them. "Excuse me, but the DA wants to talk to you, chief."

"Yeah, one sec." He pulled away from and stood up. "You can wait in my office. I mean if you want to. Can you please stay?"

She nodded. "Of course."

He hugged her before he followed his officer. Natasha saw that Brock was watching her with a clenched jaw. Was he really _jealous_ right now? His colleague had just been murdered and he was pissed that Natasha was involved with someone other than him? She glared back at him before she walked into Steve's office.

She didn't have to wait long until Steve came to her. He closed the blinds after he shut the door and then he was crashing his lips on hers. "I need you." He whispered between kisses, helping her out of his hoodie.

"We have to be quiet." She breathed back, starting to unbutton his shirt.

They didn't talk after that. They both needed this. They needed to feel alive, to feel a connection to someone. To forget how horrible and cruel the world was and to just be with someone. This was something that they could control, that they could enjoy.

"I'm sorry." He mumbled afterwards while they got back into their clothes. "I don't know what came over me. I'm not...I'm not that kinda guy who has sex at his workplace after someone died."

She took his hand and laced their fingers together. "It's okay. I think we both needed that. I felt like myself again." She cupped his cheek with her free hand and kissed him. "Don't feel ashamed. You didn't use me. We both wanted it."

"I think Darcy would have approved. Having sex at work." He chuckled before his eyes got watery. "I want to kill the bastard."

"I know. Me, too."

"He won't get to you. I promise you that, Nat." He kissed her with so much emotions that her knees got weak. "I will keep you safe."

"I know." She whispered against his swollen lips. "We'll get the bastard."

A knock startled them both and Steve let go off her and stood up from the couch. Natasha missed his touch immediately.

"Steve? Are you in there?" She recognized the voice as _Sarah's_ and blushed furiously. Shit, shit. She brushed her fingers through her hair because she and Steve both had obvious sex hair.

"Yeah, ma." He looked equally embarrassed. "One sec!"

They both put the pillows back on the couch and Natasha shoved her bra into her bag at the same moment as Steve opened the door. She hadn't even realized that she hadn't put it back on. She was just glad that she was wearing Steve's big hoodie, so she should be fine.

Sarah hugged her son and whispered to him. Natasha got a hug as well when Sarah noticed her in the room. "Thank God, you're here. I drove by Steve's place and tried calling you, but no one picked up."

"Sorry. I came here as soon as I heard." She apologized. She hadn't even heard her phone ringing, but her and Steve had been a bit...busy.

Sarah stayed with Natasha in Steve's office after her son had to go back to work. They had to promise to stay at the station so they would be safe. Natasha doubted that the killer would strike so soon again, especially now with the entire town on high alert. But he looked really worried, so she agreed to stay here. She emailed her editor to let him know what happened and he told her to write an update for the site.

She was typing the article on Steve's computer when Sarah spoke up. "Darcy was a good kid. I can't...How could something do that to her?"

"I wish I knew." She sighed. "Something is seriously wrong with the killer."

"I'm worried about Natasha. I think you're in danger."

"Every woman in this town is in danger." She replied, sending her article to Coulson.

"No one got a note though. Just you, my dear. You need to be very careful. I talked to Steve and he thinks it's one of his men."

Natasha looked at Sarah with big eyes. She'd suspected that he had a theory, but he'd never voiced it to her. "He does?"

"Don't you think it, too? A lot of his officers are vets, they are highly skilled and could have gotten a job anywhere, but they all came back. They are very dangerous and you're so petite." Sarah smiled sadly. "You wouldn't stand a chance. I'm scared that he's gonna grab you when you're alone."

"I know Krav Maga." She said stubbornly. "I can defend myself."

"I don't doubt that, but they can still overpower you. Just please be careful. Stay close to my son. He can protect you. And he will. I know what you two were doing before I showed up earlier." Sarah teased and Natasha looked to the ground. She suddenly felt a teenager who got caught making out. "Don't blush, dear. I'm happy for you. I'm very happy for my son."

"Does he have a suspicion who it is?"

"Yeah, but he won't say who. He needs more proof. But he told me not to trust any of his men." Sarah said grimly and Natasha felt a shiver running down her spine. Was the killer right now in the building? Had he greeted Darcy every day when he came into work? Had Darcy let her killer in, thinking that he had just been a friend? She felt sick to her stomach. The killer seemed to be able to act since Wanda had thought that he was a decent man.

Sarah and her went back to the B&B in the afternoon with Steve promising to come as soon as possible, but he still had to get a hold of Darcy's parents and he wanted to get the FBI involved.

Natasha went through Wanda's diary again and again in the B&B reading room, hoping to find even the tiniest clue about her killer. She was sure that Wanda's boyfriend was the one who had murdered her.

 _I bought chewing tobacco. This is the first time I got him something. I hope I got his brand._

Pietro hadn't smelled like tobacco the two times she had talked to him. Had Wanda bought the tobacco for her lover? Was she grasping at straws or did she actually find something?

Her head was pounding and she decided to take a nap on the couch. She woke up later in Steve's strong arms. "Hey." She murmured, looking up at him. "When did you get here?"

"A little while ago. I didn't want to wake up. I hope this is okay." He loosened his hold on her.

"Of course, it is." She snuggled closer against him, breathing his scent in. She detected no tobacco smell. She hated herself for checking, but she had to be sure. "Do you smoke?"

"Huh? Where is that coming from? No, I don't. I like my body cancer free."

She hadn't tasted any tobacco in his kisses, why was she asking him? He wasn't the killer. She knew that. "Do any of your officers smoke?"

He furrowed his eyebrows. "Where is this coming-" His eyes widened in realization. "Did you find something?"

"Maybe." She sat up and got Wanda's diary out off underneath the couch. "Pietro Maximoff gave this to me. It's Wanda's journal. She had a blooming relationship with an unidentified man. He got aggressive during sex. He choked her. She writes that he's older than her. And she mentions buying chewing tobacco for someone."

Steve looked at the book in her hands. "You think that she unknowingly dated her killer?"

Natasha nodded.

He seemed to be in thought. "I don't recall anyone being a smoker. Or chewing tobacco. At least not while they are on duty. But I don't spend my free time with them, so I'm not completely sure."

"Maybe it's nothing."

"But maybe it's not." He looked suddenly pained. "You asked me if I smoked...Did you think..."

"No!" She said immediately. "I don't even know why I asked. I know that you're not the killer, Steve."

"Do you not feel safe with me?"

"No, I do. I just...I had to make sure, I guess."

"I can't blame you for that. So you think it's a police officer as well?"

"Yes." She whispered. "It has to be."

He nodded grimly. "I know."

"Are your colleagues womanizers? Brock has hit on me every time he saw me, what about the others?"

"Rumlow hit on you?" Steve pulled back from her. He looked insecure. Why? "Do you...you want to go out with him?"

"God, no! Never!" She assured him, realizing why he acted like that. "I'm a one man kinda girl." She pecked his lips. "And I would never go out with a guy like him. He just wants to hit it and quit it. And I...I want more..." She admitted quietly.

Steve smiled softly. "I want more, too. With you, I hope." He gave her a sweet kiss. "I think about you all the time."

She ended up in his lap, cupping his pretty face. She was losing herself in his eyes, they were so blue with freckles of green. Everything was so terrible, but here in this bubble with him...she felt content. She slanted her lips overs his and his hold on her hips tightened, pulling her against him. "This is different." She whispered between deep kisses. "This feels different with you."

"I know." He moved to lay her down on the couch and climbed on top of her. She immediately pulled him down to connect their lips again. She felt so comfortable with him like she'd known him forever and yet everything was still so new and exciting. "This is special. You are special."

"Steve-" She moaned against his lips and he smiled. She felt so safe and cherished underneath him. She wanted to be with him. Really be with him. She wanted a relationship with him. "What are you doing to me?"

He chuckled, his hand finding its way underneath the hoodie she was never giving back to him. "I was wondering the same thing, sweetheart."

"Oh God!" Sarah yelled and she and Steve immediately sat up. "I'm so sorry!" She said, amusement thick in her voice. "I made you kids some sandwiches."

"Thanks, ma." Steve muttered while Natasha hid her face in his shoulder. She had managed to avoid getting caught making out by her parents during the entire time she'd lived at home and now it had happened twice in one day. At least it was before and after and not _during_ , because Natasha would have never survived that embarrassment.

"Oh my God." She whined after Sarah left the reading room, telling them to take as much time as they wanted. "I can never look your mother in the eye again!"

"Of course you can." He kissed her forehead. "She's over the moon about...um, this..us. I'm surprised she didn't throw a condom at us."

"What?" She laughed.

"My ma was a nurse before she opened the B&B." He took her hand and laced their fingers together. "She _likes_ you. Don't worry, my mom's pretty laid back. All the kids come to her when they have questions about sex and their parents won't talk to them about it."

Natasha was still red as a tomato when they walked into the kitchen. Steve's sweet mother knew that Natasha had sex with her son. She knew that Natasha had already had sex with her son today and she'd almost had it again with him like five minutes ago.

Sarah welcomed them with a warm smile and Natasha was touched that she'd remembered that she didn't like cucumbers. They ate in silence until Natasha remembered that Steve had told her that all the kids came to her if they had questions about sex. Wanda hadn't been a kid anymore, but still very young.

"Sarah, has Wanda Maximoff ever talked with you about a man that she was seeing?" She asked between bites. "That she had been uncomfortable with their...bedroom activities?"

"You can say sex, Natasha." Sarah chuckled. "I know that you two are having it." Natasha's cheeks felt warm and Steve's looked pretty pink. Sarah's grin vanished. "No, not that I can recall. Why?"

"I have Wanda's journal and she wrote about a man that choked her during sex. She told him to stop but he didn't."

"Oh, that's terrible! The poor thing! Do you think that it was..."

Steve nodded besides her. "Yeah, it's safe to assume. Did she mention anything else about that guy, Nat?"

"Only that he was handsome and older than her. She thought that he was a brute and womanizer, but to her he was sweet and kind until, well, he pretty much raped her." She looked at Steve. "Who, besides Brock, are flirts?"

"Him and his buddies. Rollins and Russo. They flirt with every woman. I heard that they drive to Sokovia regularly to check out the women in the bars there."

"It could be one of them?" She asked carefully.

"I don't want it to be, but yeah. They are all vets, they knew the victims, they can easily overpower a woman and kill her with their bare hands. They know everything about DNA and evidence." He leaned back against his chair. "I know that the murder works at the station. I just know it. And I'm the fucking idiot who can't catch him."

"Steve." She intertwined their fingers. "It's not your fault. But we have three suspects now. You're going to get him."

"Not without you. But I don't want you to help me. It's too dangerous. I should send you back to New York, but I want you to stay here with me." He whispered hoarsely. "What if I can't keep you safe?"

"You can't send me back, Steve. I make my own decisions and I'm going to stay here." She told him firmly and he smiled a little. "We'll get the bastard together."

"Then that's decided." Sarah laughed. "Good thing that you're as stubborn as my son."

* * *

Natasha and Steve spent the night at Sarah's, talking all night. He told her more about Darcy, that he known her since she was a kid and that she'd had a crush on his best friend. They discussed past relationships and she told him about her parents' death and how close her and her brother were.

She suggested that she could go on a date with Rumlow to figure out if he was the killer, but Steve immediately shut that idea down. They tried to come up with a plan to unmask the killer, but they couldn't think of anything that wouldn't make the three suspects aware of their plan. Her gut told her that it was Rumlow, but Steve reminded her that he was the only one that she knew and that Rollins and Russo were also strong leads. Steve made her promise him not to go after Rumlow on her own and to avoid him as much as possible.

She accompanied Steve to Darcy's memorial and met his best friend James who had come to town to pay his respects. He had to get back to the city later that day, but it was still nice, despite everything else, to meet someone important to Steve. His best friend had been very nice to her and Steve had apparently talked with him about her which made Natasha feel good. She had only told her sister in law Laura about Steve because she knew that Clint would play big brother since Natasha hadn't really been interested in a man for some time now. She knew that the circumstances were horrible, but she wanted it to work with Steve. She hoped that they had a future.

She wrote more articles about Valkyrie's serial killer and her pieces were the top reads on the website. The FBI sent a profiler and her profile about the serial killer matched Rumlow, Rollins and Russo. It was one of them. She knew it was. She just had no idea yet how to catch him.

Steve didn't want her to come to the station anymore so she wouldn't catch the eye of his three suspects. She stayed mostly at the B&B when Steve was on duty, writing articles and doing research. She'd gone through the social media accounts of the victims and the potential killers, but couldn't find anything suspicious. The only one who had really been active on Facebook and Instagram was Darcy and she had pretty much followed everyone of the town. Natasha signed up with a fake profile on dating sites who catered to people with certain kinks (like choking), but couldn't find anyone from the area. The killer had left no DNA on Darcy and there were no witnesses. There had nothing.

She was so desperate that she started to read theories from internet sleuths, but gave up when someone suggested that Ted Bundy was still alive and responsible for the murders. She rolled her eyes and closed her laptop when Steve walked into Sarah's office that Natasha had occupied.

"Hey." He smiled softly and handed her shyly a bouquet of flowers. When was the last time a man had given her flowers? "These are for you."

"Thank you!" She grinned happily, accepting the flowers and pecking his lips. "I love them!"

He asked her to have lunch with him outside on the patio and she gladly agreed. Despite trying to catch a killer, they still found time for little dates. And Natasha was happy to report that things were great between them. They could talk about everything and she hadn't enjoyed the company of someone that much in a very long time. She knew that she was falling for him. And she was sure that it was happening to him as well.

Sarah served them herself, watching them with a fond smile on her face. Steve's mother had whispered to her yesterday how happy she was that Steve had finally someone in his life and that Natasha was always welcomed here.

"Has your editor said anything about when you have to come back to the city?" Steve asked and she could hear the dread in his voice.

"No. I think he hopes that the case will be solved soon and we're the ones to have the coup." She moved with her chair until she could snuggle against him.

He wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "I know it's selfish, but I don't want you to leave."

"I like it here, with you." She admitted quietly. "What happens to us once I have to get back to the city?"

"I wanna keep seeing you, Nat." He whispered nervously.

"I wanna keep seeing you, too." She looked up at him with a soft smile. "I think we could have something great."

His beautiful face lit up. "Me, too. We can visit each other and once that's not enough anymore...we can talk about it again."

She nodded. It was the best solution for now, but she knew that decisions would have to be made if, hopefully, when things got serious between them. "Kiss me."

He smiled and pressed his lips against hers. She could honestly kiss him all day. The clicking sound of a camera made them pull away from each other and they found a sheepishly grinning Sarah with her phone in her hand.

"I'll send it to you two, don't worry!"

* * *

The next day was uneventful and Steve could leave work sooner and picked her up to drive with her through the area. He showed her his old school, the bench where he gotten his first kiss, and the closed cinema where all the teens had hung around on the weekends.

They made love later when they got home and Natasha basked in the way he kissed her softly afterwards, telling her how she amazing and perfect she was. She was drifting off in his arms when his phone rang. He got up to answer it and came back with a worried look on his face.

"Everything okay?" Had the killer struck again?!

"Yeah, my ma's alarm system is malfunctioning. I have to take a look at it, it's driving her and the guests nuts." He sighed. "I know you're tired, but can you please get dressed-"

"Steve, I can stay here." She said softly. She was touched by his concern, but she was exhausted and wanted to sleep. She would be fine here for an hour. "I'm safe here."

He didn't look convinced.

"Nothing's gonna happen to me here, Steve. Go!" She smiled and he nodded after some time.

"Okay, I'll lock the door behind me. Is your taser still on the bedside table?"

"Yes."

"Okay." He walked over to kiss her briefly before he picked his clothes up from the floor. "I'll be back as soon as possible."

She was half asleep when her phone chimed on the nightstand next to her. She picked it absently up and saw that she had a new email. She opened it and her eyes widened when she read it.

 _Maybe this is nothing. But I met a guy last year in a bar in Queens and I remember the town he was from, because Valkyrie sounds so weird. We hit it off and I took him to my apartment. I don't remember his name, I was pretty drunk that night, but he was into pretty kinky stuff and I kicked him out when it got too weird for me. He wanted to choke me and called me all kinds of insults. Maybe it's nothing, but I can't stop thinking about it ever since I read about those murders._

She wrote back, asking the woman if she remembered what the guy looked like. She answered with a yes and Natasha quickly googled Rumlow, Russo and Rollins, but only Russo had a profile pic on his Facebook account. She remembered that there were pictures of the officers at the police station and got out of bed to get dressed. She found the keys to the station and left the apartment. She remembered to send Steve a text, telling him where she was, when she arrived at the station.

She got inside and took photos of Rumlow and Rollins and sent it to the woman. She wanted to use the chance and went through Rollins's desk, but didn't find anything. She got to Rumlow's next and opened the first drawer, a gasp escaping her mouth. He had chewing tobacco in his desk. Her phone chimed and she opened the mail.

 _Brock Rumlow was the kinky fucker._

A shiver went down her spine. Brock was the killer. It was him.

She heard the door opening and she looked up, thinking that it was Steve to check up on her. But it wasn't Steve. It was _Brock_. Shit!

"I thought I saw someone in here. What are you doing here?" He raised an eyebrow. "What are you doing at my desk?"

"It's you." She blurted out before she could stop herself.

He looked confused and then his expression told her that he knew what she meant. "I told you to leave town, bitch." His whole demeanor changed and he charged at her. He was on her before she could get her taser. He threw her on the ground and she was fighting to get him off of her. "Fucking cunt. I knew I should have snatched you the first night when you were outside the B&B."

She turned her head to bite his wrist and shoved her knee into his junk. He yelled in pain and let go off her. She was frantically trying to get her taser out of her bag, but the zipper was stuck. Fuck! She had to get out of here and to her car. She had to get away from Rumlow. Suddenly his arm was around her throat, squeezing so hard that he couldn't breathe, and she knew that she was going to pass out soon and then he could do whatever he wanted with her. No, she wouldn't let that happen. She kicked her legs up and used a table to push herself against him. Rumlow lost his balance and she managed to get out of his hold. She was halfway to the door when something touched her neck and a electric shock went through her body. Oh God, that hurt so fucking much.

"Police officers have tasers too, you stupid bitch." She heard him snarl before she passed out. Her last thought was that she hoped Steve wasn't going to be the one to find her body.

* * *

Natasha wasn't a religious person, but she had always pictured the afterlife to be pleasant if it really existed, and not like _this_. Her whole body ached and her throat fucking hurt. Something hit her face. A hand had hit her. She wasn't dead after all.

"Wake up!" Rumlow grunted and he was so close to her that she could smell him. He reeked of tobacco and sweat. "I said wake up, bitch!"

It hurt but she opened her eyes. She had to blink a few times to focus. Rumlow was kneeling in front of her and she realized that she was tied to a chair. She looked around to take her surroundings in. This had to be some cabin. Which meant that she could be anywhere. The woods around Valkyrie were ginormous. No one was going to hear her. She knew that and Rumlow knew that.

Why was she still alive? "Why didn't you kill me?" She creaked out. Fuck, Rumlow must have damaged her windpipe.

"I think the right question is 'why didn't I kill you _yet_?' " His smile was sinister and Natasha tried her best to hide her fear. Nothing in her life had prepared her to get kidnap by a fucking psychopath! Maybe she should have watched more Criminal Minds. "I'm sure you told your boyfriend where you were since he's so fucking attached to your hip and I didn't want him to interrupt."

"He knows that it's you."

"He's gonna be busy with being charged with your murder, darling." Rumlow laughed and Natasha's blood went cold. No! "I have taken some tokens from the other girls and I'm gonna take something from you too. And while your lover boy is gonna look for you, I'm gonna plant it in his apartment."

"No!"

"Yes. I always had a back up plan, darling. I know what I'm doing." He ran his finger over her cheek and she wanted to vomit. "Why didn't you just give in? All of this could have been avoided if you've given in to me. I know that you want me. And I would have never hurt you if you were my girl."

"Did you say that shit to Wanda before you killed her? Wasn't it enough that you raped her? Did you have to kill her too, asshole?" Rumlow's look on his face told her that he didn't think that she knew about their affair. "She trusted you! She was a sweet girl who wasn't into your kinky shit and you should have respected that, you sick fuck!"

"Oh please, you women are all whores! She was just scared that she liked it so much!"

Jesus Christ, he had really lost his mind. "Why did you kill her? And Melinda, Claire and Darcy! Why did you kill _Darcy_!"

"Because you are all whores and you deserved to be punished! I thought Wanda was a sweet, devote girl and then she just wants to end things? No, I don't think so! And Darcy had a big mouth, she had it a long time coming! Fucking bitch thinks she can talk to me like that? And you!" She gripped her jaw with his hand to force her to look at him. "You could have had me and you decide to fuck that loser?"

She didn't dignify that with an answer. Men like him would never understand why women didn't want him.

An ugly grin was forming on his face. "I think I'll have some fun with you before...well, you know" He traced his finger over his throat. "It's gonna kill Rogers to find out what happened to you before you died. That I was the last one to have you."

No, no, no. He hadn't...none of the victims had been...Why her? "No, please no!" She begged, but she knew that it was pointless.

"I'm gonna have to get you in another position for that, though." He went around her. "I'll make sure it will be fun for you, too. Don't worry. I know how to make a woman come."

God, she wanted to cry. And vomit her insides out. She couldn't believe that she was going to get- wait, he was untying her. He pulled her up away from the chair and she took a deep breath. This was her only chance to escape. She smacked her head back, hitting him in the face, and rammed her elbow into his stomach. He yelled in pain and she started to run. She got the door open and just ran. She had no idea where she was. There were no lights and she couldn't hear a car. She just had to get away from the cabin.

"Come back, you cunt!"

She didn't turn around, she ran as fast as she could, praying that he wouldn't catch up. She ran and ran, twigs hitting in the face, and she stumbled over roots more than once, but she kept running. She would be dead if he caught her. She was literally running for her life.

"Natasha!" That was _Steve_ 's voice! She started to cry. She just had to follow the voice and then she would be safe. She was too terrified to answer him, knowing that not only Steve would hear her. "Natasha!"

The voice was coming closer. She stopped to look around, praying that she would see Steve. She saw a flashlight shining through the trees. Was that Steve?

"Natasha, Nat? I'm coming!"

She was running into the direction of the flashlight and his voice, opening her mouth to yell for him, when she heard a shot and suddenly there was a sharp pain in her lower abdomen. She felt like she was on fire. She pressed her hand on her stomach and she knew that the wetness on her hand was blood. She had been shot.

"Fuck, I missed!" She heard Rumlow yell while she dropped to the ground, the pain overpowering her.

She heard another shot, but she was still alive. Huh? She didn't hear Rumlow anymore. What happened? Was he lurking in the dark, watching her bleed to death? Where was Steve? God, had Rumlow killed him? No, he couldn't be dea-

"Natasha, sweetheart." _Steve_ was suddenly looking down at her, his hands on her stomach. He was alive! The pain was getting worse. He looked like an angel. He had come for her. "Shh, you're gonna be okay. He's dead, he can't hurt you anymore. You're safe. Everything's gonna be okay, sweetheart!"

* * *

 _8 months later_

"I think that was the last box." Steve announced when he came into the kitchen, carrying a removal crate.

"Thank God!" Natasha exclaimed and dropped down on one of the stools at the kitchen counter. She was so exhausted and they still had to unpack and put everything away, and they had to throw a housewarming party. God, moving into a house was no joke. "I'm so tired."

Steve put the box on the kitchen counter before he came to her, wrapping his arms around her. "I know, me too. But we only have to do this once."

"Yeah." She sighed softly and buried her face in his chest.

Almost dying had changed Natasha. It had changed how she viewed life and what she wanted to do with hers. She wanted to focus more on her private life, she wanted a future with Steve who hadn't left her side while she had been in the hospital recovering from her gun shot. She had been more than lucky and no vital organs had been hit. She had written an essay about about the killings and what happened to herself while she still had been in the hospital and it had gotten a lot of buzz. She'd gotten new job offers daily, but Natasha didn't accept any of them. She'd wanted a change, her life had to take a new direction. She knew it had been the right call when the Sokovian News offered her the position as its new editor and she'd accepted it. She was in charge and she already started to change the newspaper. They had uncovered that the mayor of Sokovia blocked projects of people of color without reason and he had to resign. She could help people here, she didn't have to live in New York anymore where people didn't care about each other. She wanted to live in a town where people cared for each other, where the owner of the diner knew what her favorite burger was and where the cashier at the supermarket hid one copy of the latest Vogue so Natasha would definitely get one.

She and Steve had decided to move in together and they'd found a beautiful house outside of Valkyrie. It was the perfect home for them and, just like Sarah had said, there was a enough room for more people. Natasha would lie if she didn't sometimes think about diamond rings, wedding cakes and babies, but it was too soon for that. She was more than happy with what they had for now. But in a year or two, she could see them trying for a baby, so a child would be running around the house one day.

"I love you." Steve whispered softly, kissing her forehead.

"I know." She grinned, her heart fluttering every time she heard those three words, and he pinched her arm. "Hey! Yeah, I love you, too, you dork!"


	97. Cupid II (AU)

_Sequel to Cupid_

* * *

Natasha smoothed down the skirt of her little black dress and checked her reflection in the mirror. Yeah, she cleaned up quite nicely. She reapplied her lipstick and put the tube into her clutch. Steve had invited her to an art gallery opening which would be her third date. The first date had been dinner, and the second one had been a trip to Coney Island which had been so much fun. Natasha really liked Steve and that freaked her out. Yes, she was running a dating agency, but her own love life was, well, not really exciting. She had been engaged in her 20s, but her and Alexei had decided to end their engagement, and Natasha had a few boyfriends over the years, but she hadn't really been in love with any of them. She had always been better at finding the right partner for others than for herself. Maybe that was the reason why she hadn't realized that _she_ was interested in Steve.

There was a knock on her door and she quickly grabbed her clutch and walked to the door.

"Hi." Steve smiled brightly at her and kissed her cheek.

"Hey." She grinned back and couldn't stop herself from pressing a kiss to the corner of his mouth. There had been the famous goodnight kiss after their first date and they had kissed at Coney Island, but they weren't yet at the stage where kissing the other one was natural.

"You look very beautiful, Natasha."

"Thank you. You make quite the picture yourself." And he really did. He looked so good in his blue button down and grey slacks. She was really glad that it was warm enough and Steve didn't need a jacket and she could shamelessly admire his strong arms.

He blushed adorably and she smirked at him. Steve had a cab waiting for them that brought them to the art gallery. Natasha wasn't really into art, let alone modern art, but this was a big part of Steve's life and she would try her best. He introduced her to the owner of the gallery and was kind of surprised when she heard that Steve also had a piece here tonight.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She asked him after the owner left to greet someone else.

"I don't know. I didn't want you to feel like you had to say something. I was kinda hoping that you wouldn't even notice it. I'm trying to impress you and what if you don't like it?" He said with pink cheeks.

She kissed him briefly. "Show me your piece."

"Oh-okay." He licked his lips before he collected himself again. "This way."

Steve didn't have any reason to be nervous. She loved his painting, it was actually the only piece here she actually liked. It was a beautiful painting of mountains, and it was done so well that she'd thought at first that it was a photo. The painting showed the Hindu Kush as Steve explained to her.

"It was the view from our base. It reminded me that there was still so much beauty in this country."

"It's beautiful, Steve." She reached for his hand almost on autopilot and laced their fingers together. "I love it."

He smiled at her and her chest felt tight for a moment. "Thank you."

They continued to look at the rest of the exhibit, still holding hands, and decided to have a late dinner at a restaurant near by. Steve told her more about his time as a soldier and how painting helped him to work through everything, and he seemed impressed when she told him that she had been a ballerina once. She blushed when he asked her if she still danced and if he could see it one day. She didn't really dance anymore, but she kind of wanted to pick it up again to impress him.

Steve walked her home and the kissing in front of her apartment door got steamier by the second.

"Do you want to come in?" She rasped against his lips when his hands landed on her bottom.

His hands moved back to the small of her back and she barely contained her disappointment. "I have to get up early tomorrow. I should head home." He kissed her, but this time the passion was gone. "Goodnight, Natasha."

"Yeah, goodnight." She hoped that she didn't look too disappointed. "I'll call you."

Steve nodded and pecked her lips. "Sleep well."

She watched him walk down the corridor before she unlocked her door and got into her apartment. Had she been too eager? Third date meant that something was going to happen, right? Why hadn't he come inside? It was only ten pm...Didn't he want more of her?

* * *

Natasha had to reread the text from Steve thrice when she checked her phone during her lunch break.

 _Are you free on Sunday? Ma wants to invite you over for lunch. We can go to the carnival in Prospect Park afterwards:)_

She hadn't seen Sarah since _that incident_ and she was still kind of embarrassed, even though her and Steve were now going out with each other. And also he hadn't slept with her yet, but he wanted her to spend the day with his mother already? Yes, she technically already knew his mother, but wasn't it a bit soon?

She wanted to spend the day with Steve, since she hadn't seen him this week yet, but she was still really nervous to see Sarah again. Her phone buzzed again.

 _Ma promised to behave herself. She's actually over the moon that we're going on dates. She won't embarrass you again, don't worry._

Okay, was Steve some kind of mind read? She took a deep breath and texted Steve that she was free on Sunday. If she wanted to have something serious with Steve, she was going to have to see Sarah again eventually.

Natasha couldn't even remember the last time she had been invited to the house of her...was Steve her boyfriend? She had no clue. Anyway, it had been a long time since she'd met the mother of a man that she was...seeing.

She chose jeans and a pretty blouse as her outfit, and only applied mascara and blush as her makeup. She didn't want to look like she was trying too hard. She didn't really know what to bring Steve's mother and ended up buying a bottle of Rosé on her way to Brooklyn.

Steve opened the door when she knocked on it and greeted her with a sweet kiss. "Hey, it's so good to see you."

"Yeah." She nodded, kissing him again. She hadn't seen him for a week and she kind of missed him.

"Ma's in the kitchen." He took her hand and squeezed. "Don't worry. She's really excited that you're here."

She gave him a nervous smile and followed him to the kitchen. Sarah was finishing a salad and looked up at them with a big smile on her face. "Natasha! It's so great to see you again!" She came over to her to give her a warm hug and Natasha relaxed a little bit. "I'm really sorry for, well, you know. I just want Steve to be happy."

"It's okay. I guess that you were right." Natasha admitted shyly.

Sarah grinned happily. "Yeah, looks like it."

Lunch with Sarah was good. The food was great and Sarah was truly a sweet woman who loved her son very much. She asked Natasha a lot of questions and she answered as best as she could. And Natasha was touched when Sarah gave her a little box of old beads and pearls for Lila. Her favorite part was, though, when Sarah, much to Steve's embarrassment, pulled out the family albums.

"Ma, please don't!"

"Shh! You were adorable!" Sarah said with a grin and put an album into Natasha's lap. Steve really had been a cute kid and he'd looked _so different_ before his growth spurt, but he had always been handsome.

"Aw, look at you in that Dumbo jumpsuit! You were adorable!" She cooed and Steve's face turned even pinker. She laughed and grabbed his face to kiss him. She only realized that she'd kissed him in front of his mother when she pulled away.

She looked at Sarah, but she only smiled at them. "I'm sure you two want to spend some time alone. I can copy some of the photos if you want." She winked and Steve groaned unhappily.

"Thank you for inviting me, Sarah."

"I'm really glad that you came, Natasha. Have fun at the carnival." Sarah kissed her cheek and reminded Steve to bring Natasha home after their date. He mumbled under his breath that he knew that before he hugged his mother.

"It wasn't so bad, was it?" Steve asked while they walked to Prospect Park.

"No." Natasha laughed. "I was nervous for no reason."

"My mother likes you a lot. She already warned me not to mess it up." He took her hand and intertwined their fingers. "I really hope I don't mess this up."

She looked at their hands and then at him. "Same. I don't have the best track record when it comes to this."

"We'll figure it out together." He promised and pressed a kiss to the back of her hand.

* * *

Natasha was pleasantly surprised when Steve offered to help her watch Lila and Nate when she told him that she wasn't free on Friday. She hadn't thought that he'd wanted to spend his Friday night with two kids, but he said that he didn't mind and just wanted to spend time with her. It was really cute and she had to admit that she swooned a little.

Nate was only two and fell asleep as soon as his little body hit a mattress (he really took after Clint), but Lila was a little powerhouse and Natasha already knew that she would refuse to go to sleep when Steve was there.

Natasha was right. Nate fell asleep after dinner and his snuggles, and Lila monopolized Steve. She asked him all kinds of questions and had already pretty much invited him to her house for every coming holiday. It was kind of adorable to see the two together and Natasha was sure that Steve would be an amazing father one day. Woah, where was that coming from?

Lila did fell asleep eventually and Steve carried her into Natasha's guestroom. She used his absence to start a little fire in the fireplace and to get two glasses and wine. Just because there were kids in her apartment, didn't mean that they couldn't have a romantic evening, right?

Steve joined her with a smile on his face and handed her a wine glass after filling it.

"I'm pretty sure that Lila is in love with you." She grinned and Steve chuckled.

"Too bad that I'm already sweet on someone else."

"Yeah?"

"Mm." He nodded, taking the wine glass from her and setting it back onto the coffee table. He leaned over her and caged her with his arms. She laid down on the sofa and Steve followed her, pecking her lips like he was testing the water. She grinned into the kisses, feeling like a teenage girl who had a boy over while she was babysitting.

Natasha couldn't remember the last time that she had just made out with someone and she forgot how nice it was. They kissed and kissed and their hands wandered all over each others bodies. Nothing else was going to happen tonight with Lila and Nate being here, but it was still very nice to be this close to Steve.

"So-" Steve said when she walked him to her door after midnight. He sounded nervous for some reason. "I was wondering if you wanted to take a trip with me next weekend? My friend has a house in the Hamptons and we could stay there. We would have the house all to ourselves."

She should be able to free her calendar for that weekend and a house in the Hamptons sounded lovely, but there was still a question on her mind. "Are we sure that we're there yet? I mean we haven't had even sex yet and you want to already take a weekend trip together?"

"Oh, well..." His cheeks were pink. "I wanted to take things slow...Get to know you before we'll sleep together...And with the trip... We have all the time in the world...I thought this was going somewhere with us..."

Natasha sighed in relief. She had thought that Steve maybe wasn't really into her because they hadn't shared a bed yet. "A trip sounds great, Steve. And I think this is going somewhere with us, too."

He smiled. "Good, great! I tell my friend that we want the house for next weekend, yes?" She leaned forward to kiss him softly. "Can I invite you and the kids to breakfast tomorrow?"

"Of course." She nodded with a smile and he cupped her face to give her a deep kiss. "Goodnight, Steve."

"Goodnight, Nat." His thumb was brushing over her cheekbone. "Um, so...So I'll tell my friend that I'm taking my...girlfriend with me?"

"Yes." She chuckled, her heart fluttering in her chest. "You do that, _boyfriend_."

* * *

 _This is the last one shot. And there won't be any other new stories. I'm not really into Marvel anymore and I don't enjoy this website as much as I used to._

 _Thanks for reading, a special thank you to those who took a minute to leave feedback, and take care of yourselves. Be kind to yourselves and others._


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